Love your first tip of being approachable! I think that’s huge, a guy wants to feel like he won’t be shut down if he gets the courage to ask you out :) Your all’s insight is great!
Yuliya Lyube I feel like when I try to be friendly I come across as desperate? I never seem to be able to connect because I think I try too hard to be friendly.. and then I end up having a really formal conversation because I'm too forced when trying to socialise. You probably guessed, I don't have m(any)/men-ny friends. I need help :×
This is so relevant to me at the moment. I've never had a proper boyfriend, guys just aren't really interested in me and I've never wanted to rush into a relationship or anything. My non christian friends are always saying I need a boyfriend and stuff. Even christian friends always ask about my love life. My family has started now too. I keep getting really stressed and lonely because of it. It makes me feel like there's something wrong with me.
Etakaria yeah its tough, i think girls don't know how afraid guys are to approach girls. i was always dead afraid to approach girls, and i felt sad because i really felt attracted to them but i just felt overwhelmed with fear and i know almost all guys feel that way. Most of us guys don't have many female friends (or any at all), so to enter a girl's social circle and life without having common friends to ease the anxiety, is like being a stranger to a village and trying to belong. i know girls feel that guys aren't interested but that appears that way because guys don't approach girls, because guys are dead afraid. some guys are less afraid than others, im more afraid than most guys, but i have rarely met a guy that wasn't somewhat afraid. and i liked what Tiffany said about girls being friendly, that would help me and guys sooo much, whenever i tried talking to girls i could never figure out if they actually liked me or not. guys are really, really, really bad at noticing things. I have been watching Tiffany's videos for months before i realized she was making videos for girls, when i realized i was watching videos for girls i felt really embarrased, and i only realized it because in a video Tiffany said that these videos were for girls and her women's ministry. since guys are really bad at noticing things, and finding out if a girl actually likes us, a girl being friendly and upfront would really help a lot. friendliness helps guys feel like they can belong to the girl's social circle and life, and thats what guys really want. I often read and hear that guys only want dirty things, but thats not true, guys see girls as the gateway to a very different social world, and thats what guys want, to belong to the girl's world, because it intrigues guys on a deep psychological level. friendliness and helping guys feel accepted is what guys look for.
Rebecca's randomness its really tough, i mentioned to etakaria that its because guys are dead afraid, some less than others, but i rarely meet a guy that isnt afraid to approach girls. i would feel very bad and guilty meeting so many pretty girls and feel too overwhelmingly afraid to approach them, and i would see the girls feel disappointed that i didn't approach them and i would beat myself up because i felt it was my fault they felt unwanted and undesirable, but in reality i really felt attracted to them, but it was too hard for me to talk to them. Most guys aren't as afraid as i feel, which is good, most guys will probably approach at least a few girls in their lifetime. Being friendly to guys will help us talk to girls, almost every time i ever did talk to a girl was because they talked to me first, but they only felt comfortable enough to talk to me because they didn't feel attracted me. Talking to someone you're attracted to is really hard, friendliness would really help a lot.
Thank you. It's reassuring to know girls aren't the only ones who are scared about this sort of thing. I don't think theres anything wrong with guys watching these videos. Especially when they comment and give their own perspective. I will definitely be aware of being more friendly around guys in the future.
It takes sooooo much courage for a guy to ask a girl out. It does. Because rejection sucks. I cant imagine getting the nerve up to do that. But you know what also sucks? Rejecting. Rejecting someone knowing they decided to be brave, and then having to hurt them. I've had it happen before, and I hated every minute of hurting that guy. I only wish more girls could be nice about it and make it as painless as possible instead of getting enjoyment out of hurting someone or embarrassing them. Spread love, not hate ❤
But why do we have to coddle these men? Ok rejection sucks. I've been rejected many times by men and sometimes in the most nasty ways. If I'm able to let it go and move on, why can't they? It's not like we're asking them to make a life threatening decision, it's just initiating a conversation. Today's men really need to man up, and start acting like men again.
Grace Guetschow ... well done on recognizing both sides of the coin. The answer to this issue is to get better and sending (for girls) and receiving (for guys) non verbal signals. If girls could send well crafted non verbal signals to a guy that they are open to being approached, the guy will approach. And if the screws up and starts an unwanted approach, cold nonverbal signals can give his the clue he needs to abort the unwanted approach before going too far. Also, rejection can be super easy, simply "be busy" at the time of the proposed date... and don't offer an alternative. A guy with good social skills will take that hint. And to the commenter that was so uncaring about guys feelings... the power is a rejection scenario lies with the rejector, and for this reason they should endeavour to a often the blow. Just because guys didn't live up to this standard with you doesn't mean the standard isn't right. God bless all.
Grace Guetschow thanks for recognizing that. I remember rejections 10+ years ago. One was hilarious i had a friend he was a pick up artist. I don't believe in that, but we approached a group of girls. He tried a line he told me about for a week, ended up having sex with one. The rest left the table because "i wasn't as charismatic as my friend was"
I love that you explain how rough at times it is for an introvert. I'm the same way. I wish the church family would embrace introverts more often. I'm in a place, that seems like you have to be an extrovert to be part of the group. There loss! I love them amyways.
I needed to hear all of this. I definitely need to work on being more approachable and friendly, I tend to be cold stone faced and quiet until I get used to being around new guys. Thank you so much for this encouragement!!
😂😂😂 That first tip was so me when I was younger! I was so cold toward guys...I was just so super shy! I think we have all probably felt like this at some point in our lives! Great tips guys! Loved it!! Also, your hair looks so healthy and bouncy! Loved it! Xxx
I asked a great guy out a couple weeks ago. We went out on a date, and had a great time. We decided to be friends, but I’m so glad I asked him out. I’d definitely ask a guy out again, ladies DONT BE AFRAID. Most guys will be genuinely happy to be asked out.
I'm a home schooled highschooler so its a bit harder to meet people but I still love the advice you too have given in this video especially when its a thought that's almost constantly on girls mind
wish i was home schooled . i would to control my kids education to life skills and talents . think about future jobs and hobbies ... if you work with horses be around women mostly all the time. i worked on farms so was spending lots times with cows and few guys .. haha. keeps you single tired and injured ..
Both of you made good points in this video. 1. Broaden your horizons... Get out to meet other ppl outside of your circle... I personally done this myself and had success 2. You can be attracted to different types of women..personality wise, body type wise, certain features... Be open to date/get to know different types of women. I'm still single (31 years old) but I like the path I am on regarding my confidence and personal growth.. I am sure marriage is in the future for me
LOL, please pin this comment. There's loads of guys in here saying "Girls should ask guys out!" I can't explain to them all why that simply won't work.
@@xbbt7770 you did know for some guys asking girls simply won't work ether. things get nasty for both parties. it better for right personality type to do the asking. my sister is esfp and she was able to play the game. I am intp and let just say I experience the grip of inferior function and made the girls feel uncomfortable. also make the men feel broken if they are wrong personality type to play the game.
@@spark300c It's not a problem of personality, but confidence. And the way a woman sees it: "If he'd scared of me, a tiny woman, how is he gonna handle the big problems in life?"
Thank you for this actual Christian dating advice! I feel like a lot of Christian dating advice is just telling girls to wait, which is partially true... but they also need to seem approachable and some of the other stuff you said!
When I was in middle school and praying for my future husband (asking God to prepare him for our future marriage) I had the same things on my list: tall, musician, etc and God asked me "Is it okay if he's not a musician but involved in music?" And I thought really hard about it... said yes 😄 after I said yes I wondered if He was basically telling me that my future husband won't be exactly those things or if he really did have someone with those qualities 😄 but I thank God anyway that He knows what is best! 😁 I am married and my husband doesnt sing and isnt a musician but when we met I learned he raps 😂
Candace M I've seen some of your comments on Paul and Morgan's channel. You seem so sweet and always have something productive to add. As a single 17 year old girl, I really enjoy reading your insight!
Why do I feel like I know you guys? I noticed that I've started to think of you two as my spiritual parents if that makes any sense at all. You guys are so sweet and I can truly feel the passion you have for the Lord and each other. Much love
I just realized what is wrong with me all these times...I am always walking around with a stone cold face and never properly answered any guy whom I am not close to...And my crush is just like the way I am,we are both super introverted,he is a friend of my friends,so that means we kind of belong to the same circle,he has been throwing hints that he likes me too(I don't know if he ever knows I like him) despite his shy,introverted nature,and his inexperiences with women....so I would say I'm pretty sure he likes me...but I realized I am just not approachable,and to be honest again,I find it so so hard to flash a smile even on my friends😂😂😥.......Thank you for this eye opening video .... and you have such a great chemistry,hope you continue to be happily married😊
We men have gotten tired if all the demands and expectations of women before a relationship even gets started. Add in the risk that comes with a relationship and it becomes a no brainier.
Loved the part of finding your fulfillment in God and not in your spouse. I was so insecure when I met me now husband and yes it is lovely being married but it is not a cure-all! This video was amazing and I loved every point!
Yup and strong young independent women complain about dating down and refuse to date anyone under 6ft.... if that isn't a double standard I don't know what is..
Wow! Such a good video. And I love how you said that girls so often limit themselves to one type of guy and forget that theres so much more about a guy than just his looks. What point is there in dating someone and marrying someone who has all the looks on our checklist but a boring personality? For a single almost 19 year old girl, who has never had a boyfriend, this video was on point! So much truth! Love you guys🥰🙏😚❤
This video is sooo good. Thanks for the tips, specially your last words about trying to fill the void. It is amazing to know God like the only person who can fulfill you. Love you guys!
Men look to meet their socio sexual needs when their housing needs are met. Housing needs take a long time to meet in 2018... As a 37 year old virgin, I work all the time, which means the only girls I meet is at work, which means I can get fired for sexual harassment if I ask them out. Which means the last 15-20 years of work on my housing needs would collapse. Support your brothers, sisters.
Honesty there! It's just not as easy to afford a family, and families can't support their daughters hanging around the house till get get married, so women go off to work too, and we are all searching for financial stability. Unfortunately, as I was discussing with a group of FB friends, financial stability is not always a predictable and stable goal, so that can leave you 40 and childless with your biological clock half pat 11 (women) or under the weight of financial burden with mouths to feed (men). i worked in a school for the last 12 years, definitely not a place to try to date. And that was the end of that...
FourSquareMicroFarm Part of the problem is that the incoming hordes of immigrants do have a lot of families with multiple incomes where everybody worked and this pushes up housing prices to the point that the "first leave the house when then turn 18" model isn't working anymore. The baby boomers let in all these tribalist immigrants and are shocked to find out that there kids want and need a tribe in order to have the things they did.
It depends on how you approach them. Making appropriate small talk won't hurt. Making derogatory comments might get you caught up in sexual harassment. You won't get fired for small talk.
Tiffany Dawn ya I think it's fine to ask a guy to hangout but it's not like I would say want to go on a date? Frustrating! Wish more men would do so because it shows good leadership. If a guy pursues me after I'm the first to talk to them that's great too. Seems like guys are so fearful of rejection. They just need to understand not everyone's cup of tea. Find your people and they love you
Men want to feel wanted and women don't want to feel like an option they want a man to get to know them and make them priority and women have been told sense they were little don't chase a man you look desperate so we don't anytime I've asked a guy to hangout thinking it would be nice to get to know them he gets weird so I'll wait until they ask me.
@Repent and Believe lol ya well if they didn't turn out to for the most part be turds I'd have a man most boys are trying to be men and most real men are much less easy to find
Thank you guys for blessing me with your videos. Y’all are so warm and loving. I’ve been pretty wayward lately, but I’m glad there’s Christian RUclipsrs like you who actually inspire people to come close to the faith.
I love your comment about finding your worth in God. From my experiences, I believe you are right, women believe they aren't complete, that marriage is when their grown up life actually starts. If you don't find that purpose and fill that void with God from the beginning, then you can set yourself up for stress in marriage. Explore God and the world around you while you are in the season of singleness.
Great advice but I'm 59 & most guys at my age neglect their appearance & claim they're too set in their ways! I feel often times God forgot me, that I need that God fearing gentleman! If I'm seeking, surely his seeking me as well??
Thank you for this video! This is something I have struggled with for a while. The first point really applies to me. My friends have told me I walk around with RBF, and so that is for sure something I need to work on.
Right?? It takes time and dedication to really assess if she's into you. And then you go in to ask her and she's like "nah, we're just friends." Like what the actual f***.
In almost 40 years of being a Christian, not one church Ive attended had single men to date. There were plenty of married people, single women, teenagers, widows, toddlers. The one group missing was single men. None. No one. Zero. And strangely, not one pastor seemed to notice or care.
Idk where you are, but most Chinese-American churches have the exact opposite problem, at least up until around age 40. From youth group past my young adult fellowship up to the regular adult fellowship there has always been way more single men than women. I remember one of my friends going to 4 different proms when I was in youth group because she was the only girl (compaired to like 5 or 6 guys) that was not a lot younger. In the young families group at my church, there are several single men even though they are fairly good looking, successful in their careers and own homes (which is saying something considering we live in the SF Bay area). There is only one single girl there and I have a feeling that she is either asexual or in the closet. She is beautiful, musically talented and loves anime. Pretty much every guy in my church has asked her out at some point and she has turned them all down.
I’m so blessed my current girlfriend who I had been crushing on for a while actually hit me up first we both had been crushing for awhile but she was verryyyyy not approachable as she had just moved and started going to my church I thought she hated me every time I would compliment her or show interest and now we both very happy! Sometimes girls you need to show interest. Just a text maybe or initiate a conversation once or twice. Even if you believe men should be the initiators or the leaders of a relationship (which they usually are) you can take a step and initiate a conversation this shows interest and gives us guys more confidence to take the leap of faith and ask you out!!
I'll tell you why many of us Christian guys are not asking you out. 1. If it is church, we are going to be petrified. Esp if we have been going to that church for a while and call it home. Have known a few guys who have loved the church, asked a woman out, have it not work out, and not return to the church cause of how awkward and the feeling of home being gone. Better safe than sorry. 2. In tandem with #1, we are scared for a number of reasons. Rejection is certainly one as affirmed in Exp #1. But also, if we are going to engage, we are not going to engage for the same reasons the rest of the world does. Not to have fun or go though people (Exp, "Oh, I'll just get another bf/gf"), but to genuinely get to know the person for the possibility of courtship. Means we are not looking for anything shallow. This leads to the possibility of marriage which also leads to the possibility of divorce and guess what is involved in marriage these days? Government. Many men have been pillaged by the system and men know it is against them. Many of us have been educated by our fathers, lack of a father, or other men. We fear the ever living crap out of divorce. Cause it is the ticket to free money (for you) thanks to government intervention, and if you throw a child in the mix, its even worse. Government has created and enabled the culture of single motherhood as a result. Ya, we are more cautious than ever and IF we do ask you out, don't take it lightly. 3. Women these days are more focused on a career and not committed to the motherly duties of the past such as talking care of the house, children, and cooking, etc. (most of you don't even know how to cook) Many of us who had good parents, know. Genuine femininity is rare and there are a lot of fakes in the church. 4. Many of us are saving ourselves for marriage, and we expect the same out of the other, which is beyond freaking rare. Churches are filled with single mothers who are looking for a guy to "settle down with" (hashtag, had a supper crazy party and sex filled youth and now I want you to take care of my problems with your money). Yes we are discriminating and we are using the Word of God to do it. 5. Many other reasons, just look into the recent creation and surge of the mens rights movement. PS, something that really pisses me off about churches these days is how they are adding more women's groups and retreats and have removed all of the men's groups. -_- Overall, yes were scared and are unlikely to move, especially if no solid indications are given. Author- Some random Christian guy you will probably disregard
Good list of points, but you forgot the one I think that girls too often have a double standard for (as well as men, but it seem lately much more with women). There's a popular thing in christian women circles that teach that you shouldn't have to dress up nicely or put on make-up because he should just love you for who you are. But like you said with the horizons point; the reality is that while we know what God wants for us, often on both genders, looks come first. We know that we wouldn't date someone who isn't gospel centered or believes in false doctrines, but the initial desire to talk to each other is 90% of the time based on looks (sorry but that's the world we live in, and there's no such thing as a Christian version of Prince Charming who likes you for who you are without thinking about looks). I personally believe that some women need to put in a little more effort. I've seen girls including my girlfriend, not dress nice or put any makeup on, and yet with not much thought put into it, they expect guys just to desire them right off the bat. The only reason I dated my girlfriend was because my family/brother and his gf tried to set me up. I personally thought she wasn't attractive at all at first and didn't expect us to go past the first two dates (yes...God was and still is exposing my idolatry with looks). But if they hadn't done that, I would never have dated her. I get that for some women that sounds shallow, but I know plenty of christian women including gospel centered ones who wouldn't pursue a guy they had zero attraction to unless he really pushed them or had friends push them. With so many options out there, it's easy to think you can do better, so why not aim for the hottest gospel centered mate you can find? Thankfully God has shown me attraction that goes past looks and by the third date I was really exited to be dating her. While I don't believe women should be dressing ungodly, and that they should guard the idolatry of looks, I do believe women who believe this bad teaching need to put more effort in to their looks and not have double standards.
Agreed... taking care of yourself is attractive. I wouldn't date a guy who looks like a slob all of the time. If you don't take care of yourself, that spreads throughout your life and it's going to affect the relationship in the long run. There's nothing wrong with wanting a woman who cares about looking her best.
I love your tips! I’ve definitely been wondering this myself as of late and this video was so helpful and needed. I absolutely agree on different timelines for different people. It’s a bit tough for me since most of my family were settled and married by the time they hit my current age but I keep reminding myself of timelines and God’s plan for me. I definitely need to work on my approachability because I tend to get “tunnel vision” when out in public and zone in on whatever I’m out to do. Lol. I feel like God is really helping me to transform as a person as I’m lately feeling more called to church and I’ve been getting way more involved than I had been previously. Things go the way he plans them and I trust in his will. Thanks again for all of your videos!
I literally googled the title of this video without knowing I'd find this. This was a God thing & I'm so grateful. You've got a new subscriber! It feels so good to be understood & recognized because some nights it's easier but others I wonder if I'm ever going to be loved by the right man, get married, have that happily ever after story. Thanks so much for this video!!! It's much needed & appreciated. This encourages me to be okay right now.
7:59 THIS IS KEY!! You must mutually pursue each other. If one is pursuing more than the other, or no pursuit is happening from the other, your relationship is doomed to fail. If you can't talk it out and get on the same page, leave. I speak from years of experience and heartbreak. You will bless yourself in the end if you don't put up with that nonsense.
Thank you so much for this video. I'm one of those girls you spoke about..word to word. Feels really nice to know I'm not alone. And your tips are simple yet very practical.
Gosh she really was narrow in her focus, even down to the skin tone and height. Girls can make it so much harder for guys. Attraction is important but it doesnt come in a neat little box with specific instructions. So glad she changed her perspective!👏
I just found your channel & I love you guys!! You have such real honest advice. :)) thank you for shedding some light on issues like this. You guys are the cutest💕
Hi, ive been single for 8 years after a divorce. I joined match dot com last week. I've sent 75 msgs to women since 10/1. And ive gotten very little return. Ive chatted with a few ppl but nobody really is interested. This is a good video bc women really ARE this picky. If a guy doesnt meet every requirement they have, he is dismissed. Its really frustrating, because ive opened up a bit too and gone for ppl i normally wouldnt go for, and still nothing. Im to the point in my life though where i dont care anymore if I meet someone, and I don't care what women think of me.
Dating sites are pointless for Men, women hold all the power in dating sites and the fact that they're picky and hypergamous it makes things worse. Dating sites basically stroke womens egos and make them into huge cunts because women Crave Attention and Validation. Which they can easily get on instagram, slutchat (snap chat lol) Fb, & Dating sites and get up to 10s or100s of guys overnight hitting them up meanwhile for us guys its like being in a desert looking for water to drink. Why else do you think women are so addicted to their phones? And Why else do you think women throw tantrums or are sad sometimes even cry even fucking suicidal ffs when they dont have their phones? Its because they cant see how many men are liking their pics or how many guys are tryna hit them up. The smart phone and internet was one of humans greatest inventions but combine that with an attention/ validation seeking bitch PLUS with the brainwashing of Feminism making women think they're Only Entitled the top 1% of guys because they're all supposed '' strong, equal, independant, goddesses''... Dating sites or better yet dating in general would be so much better for men if Feminism never existed and we probably wouldnt have a country full of Single Mothers too. The only thing Feminism ever did for Men was make it much easier to get some pussy without having to put a ring on it first, now the only problem is coming by Legal Virgins or just virgins in general cause nowdays women are having sex around the ages of 12 & 16 possibly younger meanwhile in the 50s this was unheard of. I bet Dating sites would've been great in the 50s but in todays time combined with feminism and the Rigged divorce courts that are in womens favor Plus the new #MeToo movement that has gotten several innocent mens lives ruined ona false rape accusation Dating in General is pointless. Sucks but this is the world we live in now and this is the environment women have created for all of us. im 20 and i guess i will never exp a relationship at all... A.I. Sexbots are looking better by the day once the West produce them Western women are so Fucked its too funny.
I messaged a woman and she asked for my interests so I told her and I got blocked. The weirdest and most off putting thing that confused the hell out of me. I don't even want to touch a dating app anymore after that.
Aaron I'm a single Christian woman but I'm a single mom of 2 that got out of an abusive situation. I love Jesus and am devoted to serving God whether single or married but i have the desire for a godly husband. No one knows I'm a mom until i tell them and they're all interested but when they find that out it makes alot of them disappear. I feel like Christian men automatically disregard single mothers. And i would personally not touch online dating it scares me. I had one guy at my church show interest in me and make every effort to talk to and get to know me and i thought he was interested but come to find out he's been dating someone and brought her to church today. 😄 it's rough out there. I'm praying and trusting God to bring me someone who won't take advantage of me because i fall in love too easily. But from some of these comments I'm glad to be single. But you seem nice and genuine. Don't give up. There are good genuine women, but idk about online dating. Are you a believer? Apply God's word RUclips channel had alot of good advice for Christian singles.
It's so true that a deeper much more meaningful attraction comes from getting to know someone, doing life with them. Go on a day trip and see how they respond to you after being together all day.
When I first became a believer, way back in the late 1980's, I had a troubling first experience with single women in the church. I was attending a large church with a big singles ministry for young adults. When attending Sunday school and church, I immediately noticed something strange. There were lots of single men and women, but absolutely none of them were dating each other. The men were coming to church alone, and the women were dragging in unbelievers from off the streets. I had been a believer long enough that I knew this just wasn't right. I actually confronted several of the women about this issue and was told that "We love our fellow believing men like brothers, and are not interested in them romantically!" This certainly left a bad taste in my mouth for women in the church. It's no wonder they have relationship issues.....for some reason, they are continuing to fish in the toilet and are wondering why they are catching turds! It is unfortunate that even Christian women can't overcome their female nature. All men need to know that at the end of the day, a woman's female nature will override their Christian faith. I have seen it first hand in my own life.
I have noticed that as well. Church women want those "bad boys" sometimes even more so than the heathen women! Perhaps it's to later "depart from the unbeliever in peace" when the good Christian women no longer want heathen, unrestrained animal sex, "within the confines of marriage", don'tcha know. Then find the good, Christian beta bucks dude, and be, not only a wife, but his friend. I've seen so many "Christian" women pull this stunt, it's become a stereotype.
+rednab2001 Interesting that the men are not dragging unbelieving women off the streets but are continuing to be faithful in their attendance besides. Could it be the case that the men know that you can't just change a woman just like that? The same is true for an unbelieving man; you're not going to just change a man because you have the magic vagina(which such purity would be controversial in itself). Nowhere in the New Testament does it teach us that's how the Church in the 1st Century grew. It ought to surprise us that Christian women do not want to marry someone who's of the same mind, same spirit, and trying to go to the same eternal destination as they are. Wouldn't we think that marriage would be a lot easier and more enjoyable if it was more of an "army of two" instead of "one vs. one"? But there's a certain desire of women that we read about in Genesis 3:16.
Don't generalize!! Not all Christian church-going women are like that. I have gone on dates with guys at church who were believers and once they learned I wouldn't have premarital sex with them, they wanted nothing to do with me. Unfortunately, its said that 70% of people in church have premarital sex, and "some" Christian guys want to be part of those statistics. So it goes both ways. Also, the bitterness I'm reading in these comments are not very "Christian-like" behavior and rather insulting. Maybe its not the women that are the problem.
Glorfinniel you are correct that there is a lot of “the world” in the Church when it comes to sexual morality or lack there of. But the evidence I have seen shows me that women are much more willing to be unequally yoked than men are in the church. Currently, there is zero incentive for a man to marry anyone, and faith does not change that...and yes, women and their enablers are the problem. I champion male chastity if not married, and I no longer believe any man of faith should be marrying.
I feel so bad for you, they do all the time! They are miserable creatures unfortunately, now guys have other option go hay, because ladies are so cruel!!! Is that a plan of your God, of course not, evil plan to destroy God's families all over the world, making ladies feel like we were fishing in the toilet!!!
I’m dying!!!! So glad I found you. Ever since my last relationship I’ve been so uninterested in meeting guys and going on dates bc I feel like I’ve already done that. I think I really feel like “the one” is suppose to come knocking on my door. Soo, perhaps I should prolly make an effort to go out and meet em. 😖🥺🙄
Most men fear to approach women not because of the possibility of failure but because of the possibility of being hummiliated in public.Some women love doing that.If you do not correspont to a guy's feeling, try to tell that in a more respectfull manner.Thus the guy will learn from the experience and go for somebody else.It's simple.
Nope. It’s what I look like. I had no issue when I was thinner and prettier and younger. Plus I was told this by someone. Probably there are lots of things I could do to improve my looks. Need to wait until these things are DOABLE.
wow, thank you, i actually avoid thinking about relationships too much bc i’m finishing law school and i always tell myself it wouldn’t be the best time for that but sometimes i stop and think like, what is wrong with me? i’m almost 22, never even kissed a guy. but i saw myself in many of the “wrongs” you presented, i have high standards, i almost never go out, i’m not approachable, and i NEVER admit i have interest on someone bc i’m afraid of rejection, but the thing is i’m so uncomfortable around guys, i only had one male friend and he was gay so i just don’t know how to talk to them for example there’s this guy from my church i had a crush on and we know each other since kids so it shouldn’t be a problem but at one time we were praying together and i stuttered so much he probably thought i was an idiot, i don’t know i don’t have great social skills at all so its kind of easier for me to just don’t talk at all and being more closed bc i’m scared i’ll do something like that and ruin everything, idk, i know i’m very late to the video i just wanted to vent
Don't hang around with homosexuals. It puts heterosexual men off. Lots of men are into sport. Consider getting into a sports team or at least watching sport so you've got something to talk about with men?
Oh I totally relate to this! When I had a crush on someone, I had such a hard time being myself (or acting "normal" lol) around them! I don't know if these videos would help in some way, but this one is about social anxiety - ruclips.net/video/VaWHLBRV39A/видео.html ... and this one is about tips for friends/meeting people -ruclips.net/video/Oeh870hCDVc/видео.html - I hope they can help in some way! :)
Larissa Strecht ... whatever you plan to do, get started on it. You have such unbelievably high value right now. At 22 you have time. Time to find a good man, time to learn hot to flirt, time to meet and marry, time to enjoy each other's youth. Time before the kids come along. You have not been emotionally damaged by bad relationships yet, and you are fertile. Make a study if it... you are smart. Use that. Study this problem on psychology literature and in life coaching books. Make up practice regimens for yourself to overcome your fears. Do demographic research to find you man. Do it now. At 30 the game changes and you lose value by the minute. I say this as your brother... don't wait. God bless
I've been with many women in my life, i had no fear of rejection what so ever. I love it when a lady says hi to me with a smile along with eye contact. I've done the asking with little effort but now I'll just sit and watch since the rules have changed over. It's my turn to be approached now, and that to has happened several times.
I can so relate to your first tip and your story/example. I do that all the time and am currently working on that. Thank you for the video! I loved it ❤❤
I really liked the last tip cuz I feel like I'm assuming to much by asking a girl out I would rather a girl ask me that shows me she's interested I don't want to force a interest that's not there
Not Christian, but the best advice I could give a girl is to show that you are interested in their hobbies/interests. It is always better to get to know them and be friends with them before dating so that you know the good and bad qualities that they have. Being "friendly" does not tell a guy that you are interested in them. If you like music, go to local shows. Do you like video-games, anime, comics, etc. If you like science, there are events for that too. . Go to stuff like comic con. Guys like doing things/hobbies, so all you need is to find a place that allows people to meet with that particular interest. Also, plenty of girls act friendly, yet give a nasty, disgusted look when you ask them out like you took a crap right in front of her or something. Sure, being nice may help, but it doesn't tell a guy if you are interested or what your intentions will be if he does ask you out. I've asked plenty of girls out on dates and spent the money only to find out that what I did for them was all that they wanted from me. You have to be open to doing things that don't cost money, so that he also knows that you are interested in him as a person and not what he can do for you.
yup .. you never date . like like going to hostels traveling . you visit tourist spots together build friendship and memories that build feelings . be careful who jabbing out with it scares away opputurnety case people think hookingup dating . plus develop feelings . life trap is friend them . then they eventually fall in love with ya . get foot in the door . friends with people like or possibly date if things go south .. i bought this information . get a pool they come over for a swim . get horse pets ... no pressure or date they just visiting for fun and animals . then just happens . if you ask on date they run away . feel like have to get married . haha
I loved this video! I’m 21 years old and my expectations were so high, I wanted to be married at 18 with a tall guy who sings, in the worship team or doing service in church. I’ve never had a boyfriend, been kissed or had any romantic thing in my life. My mom told me that I was too cold and serious so guys were afraid to talk to me and I said to her that she was wrong but now that you said it that may be true. I really hope that I can meet the person that God has for me 😌
paradigm clashes. i came from a nightmarish dysfunctional family, and the only girls that seemed drawn to me were all the ones i was not drawn to, and then after i got saved, its like, something got weirder, the girls i found attractive were attracted to me, but then paradigms became the problem...when we live in a culture where no one is repenting at all, and you are, then the issue becomes a sort of vibes thing, when they cant vibe off of you, then they dismiss you altogether. most men and women stick with what they know, even when it simply doesnt work, or its not what they really want. now that i know exactly what i really want, harder to find now.
I am just insanely traditional and I get rejection exists and guys are scared too, but I firmly believe men should be courting and that is really up to them to “make the first move.”
Love this video and I’ve just subscribed! I’m currently in a situation where I like a guy who I work with but he’s been single for 6 months after coming out of a 12 year relationship. We kind of flirt a lot in work, there’s a lot of playful banter and people have commented on it saying there’s “vibes” between us. I don’t know what to do to be honest
My best advice is to marry an older man. My husband is 20 years older than me and I highly recommend it. He is mature, kind, patient, secure in his identity, has a real job, and doesn't chase other women.
Sorry, that is just way too gross for me. No, I won't date someone 20 years old. I won't date someone 5 years older then me. That isn't always gonna work. Just because it worked for you, doesn't mean it works for all.
It is so different from person to person. If your husband is mature, kind and doesn't follow other women it might be because of his own personality and also it depends on so many other factors. I think it has little to do with age. There are old men like men in their 50s and 60s who betray their wives.
@@nofybn7794 You won't date a guy 5 years older but you will date a guy younger than you even if it more than 5 years. Praise God that an economic collapse is coming and women will marry whatever they can get their hands on to survive.
So true thanks for that. I just stick to church events but then I end up seeing the same people. Maybe if I tried widening my social circle I can find someone. You never know.
True - you never know! We actually made a video called 10 Places to Meet Guys! Here's the link if you're interested: ruclips.net/video/Oh0guCvV_tM/видео.html ❤️
Hi Tiffany, I was wondering could you do a video regarding attraction? I don't fully understand how to know when you feel attracted, and this makes me nervous to date anyone because I am afraid that I could be setting simply because I don't understand what I am supposed to feel.Thanks, have a blessed day.
Oh that's such a great question!! I think the feeling will be different for different people. I think, at least for me, it's this idea of being drawn to the person, to who they are as a whole person, and wanting to spend time with them. It's like this extra desire to spend a ton of time with this person. But that's just what it's like for me, it can feel differently for different people! :) And I think sometimes it's okay to start dating someone even if you're not sure if what you're feeling is attraction or not. I think it becomes clear with time.
Top reasons for not asking a girl out: - I overheard you saying you don't want or don't know if you want children. - I can't afford your debt. -You're never single or date non-Christians. - Not interested enough to carry a conversation. Example: "Hey, (female), how are you doing?" "I'm fine-"*walks off* -You're not really mature or are self-absorbed: God does not appear to be the center of your life. -Older and other Christians have actually told me to avoid you because of your reputation. -I asked you out once and was turned down or saw you turn down others for superfluous reasons. And now, having been called to missions, I can't accept anything less than a woman who is also called. Dating got a whole lot easier for me... there's just no one who fits at the moment. There are church-going women, but few Godly women. There are attractive women, but "wife material" is rare. There are no "good" women, but the closest you can find is one who is accountable... which is still rare. Trust me. Male or female, your life, your children's lives, and your eternities will be better off if you hold out for a Godly spouse. Never married, but definitely found out this truth the hard way.
And girls only fear rejection from the guys they want to date. But its not like theyre not being approached. Guys get regected and overlooked everyday depending on your status.
No, I can't ask a guy out, I know guys are very visual and if they aren't attracted to a woman they won't bother pursuing them.... it would hurt so bad if I asked a man out, and he only decided to date me cause I was there and not cause he was attracted to or interested in me.... guys taking the lead is what boosts my attraction in a man. I'm a girl btw.
This video is awesome I've been struggling a lot with the fact that I'm in my 20's and have never seriously dated anyone and my sister and best friend just got married so I've definitely been feeling the pressure 😂
My too, i live in the states and find women have to high of expectations for guys and especially Christian men. I love Jesus but that just doesn’t seem to be enough
The Thinking Mans Game there are some good Christian girls out there but they do seem very picky and particular about who they date. Kinda have to be a stud or have a six figure job to impress most of them. I mean, life is what it is. There have been a few decent girls I’ve turned down because I simply wasn’t that attracted to them. It goes both ways sometimes.
@Pickel Sandwich they’re not all “ruined”. Just like how some Christian women find it very difficult to find a Christian man with good morals, not a sex demon, and respectful. Maybe it’s a case of looking for love in the wrong places? Idk but I do know that it’s way more challenging to find true real love (especially if you’re a follower of Christ) in today’s world. I see a lot of horrible men and women but I’m not going to shun half of the population and condemn them 🤦🏾♀️
Don’t worry you‘ve got legs 😉 I hope the video encouraged you to look for relationship in God first! That’s what I do! And when I am closed to God I don’t habe any lack.. I am sure you heard that before/ know that.. I just wanted to remind of that 🙃 kind regards and God bless! ❤️ Your future is gonna be lit with your God beside you assisting you in fulfilling your purpose ☺️😎❤️
Thank you so much for this video. I kind of teared up a bit because I FEEL THIS TOO AND I’VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT SO MUCH LATELY! The guy I like and I have a really sarcastic friendship right now. We are always joking around and poking fun at each other (in a nice way of course). But I’m always worried that since we have pretty different personalities, (I’m more calm, shy and mellow, and he’s loud, the most outgoing person I know, and energetic) that he thinks that I’m being serious and that I don’t care for him. And I never want to give him that idea because I’ve realized, especially lately, that I care for him so much more than I thought I did. I will definitely try to follow your advice and keep an open mind about it all, as well as a hopeful attitude. Just over this past year I’ve been getting to the age where a lot of my peers are dating. A lot of my friends are finding boyfriends and I’ve felt so caught behind and incapable of doing the same. There have been maybe one or two guys that have said that they liked me, but they didn’t know me. It was such a surface level thing. It didn’t feel right talking to them and I felt uncomfortable like I was being objectified or something because they only knew me from the outside. And I didn’t know them. I tried to give them a chance, but it wasn’t right to me. With the guy i like now, it feels more right. I don’t know where God is going to take this or what his plan is, but I feel like God is just calling me to pour into his life right now and be an encouragement. I don’t know if He’ll develop this into a long-lasting relationship or if we’ll stay friends but I know that this guy needs someone to care for him right now. Anyways, this comment got so off track. Thank you for this video though!
No guy is asking you out because that's no what guys do. Guys don't just go "ask out" girls and the ones that do are pursuing girls who are much much prettier than they are. You can literally dominate the dating sphere if you, as a girl, ask a guy out instead. This is coming from a guy.
Let me tell you, if you're waiting for a girl to ask you out, you're gonna be waiting a very long time. In fact, in the time you spend waiting for the girl to ask you out, she's being asked out by guys who aren't afraid.
@@xbbt7770 - Let me tell you,there are guys who just wait, and they are happy to wait because they are not going to let themselves be treated like that. Not "fear" , just being practical.
I love that he’s just sitting there eating them drops random truth bombs and goes back to his bowl😂
Victoria Hicks Hicks lol
My last brain cell tbh
So typical of guys😄
Victoria Hicks Hicks 😆😆😆😆😆
😂
James has such a thoughtful face while he's eating.
LOL he really does!!😂
Are you talking to me or Tiffany?? I'm wearing a dress with a high neckline...
😂😂😂
Hihi
They are both lovely people ❤️
James has a perfect voice for radio or cartoons 👀
So true!
He sounds like Steve from Blues Clues!
Ft
Love your first tip of being approachable! I think that’s huge, a guy wants to feel like he won’t be shut down if he gets the courage to ask you out :) Your all’s insight is great!
Paul and Morgan so true. Being friendly is helpful
Yuliya Lyube 😊😊
Yuliya Lyube
I feel like when I try to be friendly I come across as desperate?
I never seem to be able to connect because I think I try too hard to be friendly.. and then I end up having a really formal conversation because I'm too forced when trying to socialise.
You probably guessed, I don't have m(any)/men-ny friends. I need help :×
Who would've thought not looking like u had a stick implanted in ur ass would make someone more inclined to approach u
If the girl likes you it shouldnt even be an effort to talk to them
“Still can’t play guitar.” 😂😂
How about a date? 😊
This is so relevant to me at the moment. I've never had a proper boyfriend, guys just aren't really interested in me and I've never wanted to rush into a relationship or anything. My non christian friends are always saying I need a boyfriend and stuff. Even christian friends always ask about my love life. My family has started now too. I keep getting really stressed and lonely because of it. It makes me feel like there's something wrong with me.
Etakaria I'm in the same situation so you're definitely not alone
Etakaria yeah its tough, i think girls don't know how afraid guys are to approach girls. i was always dead afraid to approach girls, and i felt sad because i really felt attracted to them but i just felt overwhelmed with fear and i know almost all guys feel that way. Most of us guys don't have many female friends (or any at all), so to enter a girl's social circle and life without having common friends to ease the anxiety, is like being a stranger to a village and trying to belong.
i know girls feel that guys aren't interested but that appears that way because guys don't approach girls, because guys are dead afraid.
some guys are less afraid than others, im more afraid than most guys, but i have rarely met a guy that wasn't somewhat afraid.
and i liked what Tiffany said about girls being friendly, that would help me and guys sooo much, whenever i tried talking to girls i could never figure out if they actually liked me or not.
guys are really, really, really bad at noticing things. I have been watching Tiffany's videos for months before i realized she was making videos for girls, when i realized i was watching videos for girls i felt really embarrased, and i only realized it because in a video Tiffany said that these videos were for girls and her women's ministry.
since guys are really bad at noticing things, and finding out if a girl actually likes us, a girl being friendly and upfront would really help a lot.
friendliness helps guys feel like they can belong to the girl's social circle and life, and thats what guys really want. I often read and hear that guys only want dirty things, but thats not true, guys see girls as the gateway to a very different social world, and thats what guys want, to belong to the girl's world, because it intrigues guys on a deep psychological level.
friendliness and helping guys feel accepted is what guys look for.
Rebecca's randomness its really tough, i mentioned to etakaria that its because guys are dead afraid, some less than others, but i rarely meet a guy that isnt afraid to approach girls.
i would feel very bad and guilty meeting so many pretty girls and feel too overwhelmingly afraid to approach them, and i would see the girls feel disappointed that i didn't approach them and i would beat myself up because i felt it was my fault they felt unwanted and undesirable, but in reality i really felt attracted to them, but it was too hard for me to talk to them.
Most guys aren't as afraid as i feel, which is good, most guys will probably approach at least a few girls in their lifetime. Being friendly to guys will help us talk to girls, almost every time i ever did talk to a girl was because they talked to me first, but they only felt comfortable enough to talk to me because they didn't feel attracted me.
Talking to someone you're attracted to is really hard, friendliness would really help a lot.
Thank you. It's reassuring to know girls aren't the only ones who are scared about this sort of thing.
I don't think theres anything wrong with guys watching these videos. Especially when they comment and give their own perspective.
I will definitely be aware of being more friendly around guys in the future.
That does sound really stressful! When people always ask that definitely adds to the sense of stress/loneliness. You are definitely not alone!
God is just taking His time writing me one heck of a love story. 🙌
hahaha typical woman
if he ant you had fun on journey .. it is what it is .. what will be will be beside s helping the odds with knowledge .
All the best
@Robert Jones That's rude. You shouldn't say that to people. Oh but who am I to talk? I'm just a woman.
It takes sooooo much courage for a guy to ask a girl out. It does. Because rejection sucks. I cant imagine getting the nerve up to do that. But you know what also sucks? Rejecting. Rejecting someone knowing they decided to be brave, and then having to hurt them. I've had it happen before, and I hated every minute of hurting that guy. I only wish more girls could be nice about it and make it as painless as possible instead of getting enjoyment out of hurting someone or embarrassing them. Spread love, not hate ❤
Pretty much
But why do we have to coddle these men? Ok rejection sucks. I've been rejected many times by men and sometimes in the most nasty ways. If I'm able to let it go and move on, why can't they? It's not like we're asking them to make a life threatening decision, it's just initiating a conversation. Today's men really need to man up, and start acting like men again.
Today's men don't need to do anything for today's women
Grace Guetschow ... well done on recognizing both sides of the coin. The answer to this issue is to get better and sending (for girls) and receiving (for guys) non verbal signals. If girls could send well crafted non verbal signals to a guy that they are open to being approached, the guy will approach. And if the screws up and starts an unwanted approach, cold nonverbal signals can give his the clue he needs to abort the unwanted approach before going too far.
Also, rejection can be super easy, simply "be busy" at the time of the proposed date... and don't offer an alternative. A guy with good social skills will take that hint.
And to the commenter that was so uncaring about guys feelings... the power is a rejection scenario lies with the rejector, and for this reason they should endeavour to a often the blow. Just because guys didn't live up to this standard with you doesn't mean the standard isn't right.
God bless all.
Grace Guetschow thanks for recognizing that. I remember rejections 10+ years ago. One was hilarious i had a friend he was a pick up artist. I don't believe in that, but we approached a group of girls. He tried a line he told me about for a week, ended up having sex with one. The rest left the table because "i wasn't as charismatic as my friend was"
James being there was sooo super helpful... I can finally kind of see the guys perspective now..
P.s you're so cute together 😁
James is right it is hard for guys to ask girls out. And my wife ask me out 25 years ago after meeting at a gas station. All in God's plan
I love that you explain how rough at times it is for an introvert. I'm the same way. I wish the church family would embrace introverts more often. I'm in a place, that seems like you have to be an extrovert to be part of the group. There loss! I love them amyways.
I needed to hear all of this. I definitely need to work on being more approachable and friendly, I tend to be cold stone faced and quiet until I get used to being around new guys. Thank you so much for this encouragement!!
I have definitely been that way too!!
Same with me! 😊
YOUR GONNA BE SINGLE FOR LIFE LMAOOO
Lol guys feel the same way you know.
Why didn't you want to go out with me? 🤔 I want to approach you but there's a cold face glaring at me. 😞
😂😂😂 That first tip was so me when I was younger! I was so cold toward guys...I was just so super shy! I think we have all probably felt like this at some point in our lives! Great tips guys! Loved it!! Also, your hair looks so healthy and bouncy! Loved it! Xxx
Mat & Est - ChristianVloggers that was me too
This was sooo me😂😂 my secret exposed
Mat & Est - ChristianVloggers If I like someone I automatically avoid them
I am 20 and I think I am still cold towards guys realizing that now.
I asked a great guy out a couple weeks ago. We went out on a date, and had a great time.
We decided to be friends, but I’m so glad I asked him out. I’d definitely ask a guy out again,
ladies DONT BE AFRAID. Most guys will be genuinely happy to be asked out.
I'm a home schooled highschooler so its a bit harder to meet people but I still love the advice you too have given in this video especially when its a thought that's almost constantly on girls mind
No way!! I was homeschooled too, and so was James! What a small world! :):):)
We are everywhere, and we often are late bloomers.
wish i was home schooled . i would to control my kids education to life skills and talents . think about future jobs and hobbies ... if you work with horses be around women mostly all the time. i worked on farms so was spending lots times with cows and few guys .. haha. keeps you single tired and injured ..
Both of you made good points in this video.
1. Broaden your horizons... Get out to meet other ppl outside of your circle... I personally done this myself and had success
2. You can be attracted to different types of women..personality wise, body type wise, certain features... Be open to date/get to know different types of women.
I'm still single (31 years old) but I like the path I am on regarding my confidence and personal growth.. I am sure marriage is in the future for me
ASk hIM OUt?!!!! My heart is beating just thinking about it.
cause you have to pay?lol
LOL, please pin this comment. There's loads of guys in here saying "Girls should ask guys out!"
I can't explain to them all why that simply won't work.
@@xbbt7770 you did know for some guys asking girls simply won't work ether. things get nasty for both parties. it better for right personality type to do the asking. my sister is esfp and she was able to play the game. I am intp and let just say I experience the grip of inferior function and made the girls feel uncomfortable. also make the men feel broken if they are wrong personality type to play the game.
and exactly who some guys feel.
@@spark300c It's not a problem of personality, but confidence. And the way a woman sees it: "If he'd scared of me, a tiny woman, how is he gonna handle the big problems in life?"
The short of it is that guys just gave up 😂 they don’t care too continue trying anymore.
This is the same for a lot of girls, though.
@@himawarinone3661 And when did girls ever TRY to approach guys? How can you give up on something you never even tried?
Thank you for this actual Christian dating advice! I feel like a lot of Christian dating advice is just telling girls to wait, which is partially true... but they also need to seem approachable and some of the other stuff you said!
When I was in middle school and praying for my future husband (asking God to prepare him for our future marriage) I had the same things on my list: tall, musician, etc and God asked me "Is it okay if he's not a musician but involved in music?" And I thought really hard about it... said yes 😄 after I said yes I wondered if He was basically telling me that my future husband won't be exactly those things or if he really did have someone with those qualities 😄 but I thank God anyway that He knows what is best! 😁 I am married and my husband doesnt sing and isnt a musician but when we met I learned he raps 😂
Candace M I've seen some of your comments on Paul and Morgan's channel. You seem so sweet and always have something productive to add. As a single 17 year old girl, I really enjoy reading your insight!
You chose height over musical involvement. Interesting priorities.
Awwww this is so awesome
I wonder what that conversation looked like.
@@Theimmure between who?
James is just adorable.....very helpful, very sweet
Why do I feel like I know you guys? I noticed that I've started to think of you two as my spiritual parents if that makes any sense at all. You guys are so sweet and I can truly feel the passion you have for the Lord and each other. Much love
Awwww!! Much love back to you Rebecca!! :):)
I just realized what is wrong with me all these times...I am always walking around with a stone cold face and never properly answered any guy whom I am not close to...And my crush is just like the way I am,we are both super introverted,he is a friend of my friends,so that means we kind of belong to the same circle,he has been throwing hints that he likes me too(I don't know if he ever knows I like him) despite his shy,introverted nature,and his inexperiences with women....so I would say I'm pretty sure he likes me...but I realized I am just not approachable,and to be honest again,I find it so so hard to flash a smile even on my friends😂😂😥.......Thank you for this eye opening video .... and you have such a great chemistry,hope you continue to be happily married😊
'Still can't play guitar' 😂😂 thank you @paul& Morgan for showing me this video❤️🔥🔥
Joanna Lambright what other instruments do you play?
We men have gotten tired if all the demands and expectations of women before a relationship even gets started. Add in the risk that comes with a relationship and it becomes a no brainier.
From the guy's perspective. These are great tips.
Also, these all apply to guys too. It's not like only girls have these issues.
Loved the part of finding your fulfillment in God and not in your spouse. I was so insecure when I met me now husband and yes it is lovely being married but it is not a cure-all! This video was amazing and I loved every point!
Most men walk around like we are invisable. Women find this out when they hit the Wall.
Yup and strong young independent women complain about dating down and refuse to date anyone under 6ft.... if that isn't a double standard I don't know what is..
@xwinniez 😂
Wow! Such a good video. And I love how you said that girls so often limit themselves to one type of guy and forget that theres so much more about a guy than just his looks. What point is there in dating someone and marrying someone who has all the looks on our checklist but a boring personality?
For a single almost 19 year old girl, who has never had a boyfriend, this video was on point! So much truth! Love you guys🥰🙏😚❤
“Yep. Still can’t play guitar” 😂
Logan Tyndall what's your favourite instrument 😂 aha and how are you
Seen this comment right when he said it 😂
This video is sooo good. Thanks for the tips, specially your last words about trying to fill the void. It is amazing to know God like the only person who can fulfill you. Love you guys!
Gilda Torres It is a good video!
When did women ever buy into the myth they are somehow immune from rejection? It's part of life. Ask any guy.
😭😭I am not alone.. Thank you 😭😭
Men look to meet their socio sexual needs when their housing needs are met. Housing needs take a long time to meet in 2018... As a 37 year old virgin, I work all the time, which means the only girls I meet is at work, which means I can get fired for sexual harassment if I ask them out. Which means the last 15-20 years of work on my housing needs would collapse.
Support your brothers, sisters.
Honesty there! It's just not as easy to afford a family, and families can't support their daughters hanging around the house till get get married, so women go off to work too, and we are all searching for financial stability. Unfortunately, as I was discussing with a group of FB friends, financial stability is not always a predictable and stable goal, so that can leave you 40 and childless with your biological clock half pat 11 (women) or under the weight of financial burden with mouths to feed (men). i worked in a school for the last 12 years, definitely not a place to try to date. And that was the end of that...
FourSquareMicroFarm Part of the problem is that the incoming hordes of immigrants do have a lot of families with multiple incomes where everybody worked and this pushes up housing prices to the point that the "first leave the house when then turn 18" model isn't working anymore. The baby boomers let in all these tribalist immigrants and are shocked to find out that there kids want and need a tribe in order to have the things they did.
@@UnityFromDiversity Welcome the foreigner. It's in the Bible.
It depends on how you approach them. Making appropriate small talk won't hurt. Making derogatory comments might get you caught up in sexual harassment. You won't get fired for small talk.
Guys ask me to hangout but don't actually say can I take you out. Ugh I need this!
Yes, I think that happens a ton today! I think there can be a lot of fear of putting ourselves out there and possibly being rejected.
Tiffany Dawn ya I think it's fine to ask a guy to hangout but it's not like I would say want to go on a date? Frustrating! Wish more men would do so because it shows good leadership. If a guy pursues me after I'm the first to talk to them that's great too. Seems like guys are so fearful of rejection. They just need to understand not everyone's cup of tea. Find your people and they love you
Men want to feel wanted and women don't want to feel like an option they want a man to get to know them and make them priority and women have been told sense they were little don't chase a man you look desperate so we don't anytime I've asked a guy to hangout thinking it would be nice to get to know them he gets weird so I'll wait until they ask me.
@Repent and Believe lol ya well if they didn't turn out to for the most part be turds I'd have a man most boys are trying to be men and most real men are much less easy to find
@@maryswenson5357 chasing a woman is the worst a guy can do , and if he does he will end up friendzoned or rejected.
Thank you guys for blessing me with your videos. Y’all are so warm and loving. I’ve been pretty wayward lately, but I’m glad there’s Christian RUclipsrs like you who actually inspire people to come close to the faith.
I love your comment about finding your worth in God. From my experiences, I believe you are right, women believe they aren't complete, that marriage is when their grown up life actually starts. If you don't find that purpose and fill that void with God from the beginning, then you can set yourself up for stress in marriage. Explore God and the world around you while you are in the season of singleness.
I love that James is frequently just sitting there chowing down and dropping nuggets of wisdom here and there for the rest of us to nibble on.
Great advice but I'm 59 & most guys at my age neglect their appearance & claim they're too set in their ways!
I feel often times God forgot me, that I need that God fearing gentleman!
If I'm seeking, surely his seeking me as well??
I’m in the same boat.
Notice how she took ZERO accountability for being single at 59. Girl you missed the boat, are you that clueless? 59 and you act like a child
Thank you for this video! This is something I have struggled with for a while. The first point really applies to me. My friends have told me I walk around with RBF, and so that is for sure something I need to work on.
Hahahaha I have DEFINITELY done that too 😂👌
We don’t ask you out because we don’t like getting rejected
Right??
It takes time and dedication to really assess if she's into you. And then you go in to ask her and she's like "nah, we're just friends." Like what the actual f***.
@@SCRaetz that sucks bad...
In almost 40 years of being a Christian, not one church Ive attended had single men to date. There were plenty of married people, single women, teenagers, widows, toddlers. The one group missing was single men. None. No one. Zero. And strangely, not one pastor seemed to notice or care.
Same. I'm almost 29 and I see the same problem. Only single men I see in churches or catholic communities are teenagers and in their early 20.
@@annakarina8417 Its of epidemic proportions yet no pastors nor ministries are intentionally reaching men.
31.
Single.
Man.
Christian.
Church goer.
We exist.
Idk where you are, but most Chinese-American churches have the exact opposite problem, at least up until around age 40. From youth group past my young adult fellowship up to the regular adult fellowship there has always been way more single men than women. I remember one of my friends going to 4 different proms when I was in youth group because she was the only girl (compaired to like 5 or 6 guys) that was not a lot younger. In the young families group at my church, there are several single men even though they are fairly good looking, successful in their careers and own homes (which is saying something considering we live in the SF Bay area). There is only one single girl there and I have a feeling that she is either asexual or in the closet. She is beautiful, musically talented and loves anime. Pretty much every guy in my church has asked her out at some point and she has turned them all down.
Man. Where's that church? I'm a single young Christian man, and I'm living in a single-Christian-woman desert.
I’m so blessed my current girlfriend who I had been crushing on for a while actually hit me up first we both had been crushing for awhile but she was verryyyyy not approachable as she had just moved and started going to my church I thought she hated me every time I would compliment her or show interest and now we both very happy! Sometimes girls you need to show interest. Just a text maybe or initiate a conversation once or twice. Even if you believe men should be the initiators or the leaders of a relationship (which they usually are) you can take a step and initiate a conversation this shows interest and gives us guys more confidence to take the leap of faith and ask you out!!
I'll tell you why many of us Christian guys are not asking you out.
1. If it is church, we are going to be petrified. Esp if we have been going to that church for a while and call it home. Have known a few guys who have loved the church, asked a woman out, have it not work out, and not return to the church cause of how awkward and the feeling of home being gone. Better safe than sorry.
2. In tandem with #1, we are scared for a number of reasons. Rejection is certainly one as affirmed in Exp #1. But also, if we are going to engage, we are not going to engage for the same reasons the rest of the world does. Not to have fun or go though people (Exp, "Oh, I'll just get another bf/gf"), but to genuinely get to know the person for the possibility of courtship. Means we are not looking for anything shallow. This leads to the possibility of marriage which also leads to the possibility of divorce and guess what is involved in marriage these days? Government. Many men have been pillaged by the system and men know it is against them. Many of us have been educated by our fathers, lack of a father, or other men. We fear the ever living crap out of divorce. Cause it is the ticket to free money (for you) thanks to government intervention, and if you throw a child in the mix, its even worse. Government has created and enabled the culture of single motherhood as a result. Ya, we are more cautious than ever and IF we do ask you out, don't take it lightly.
3. Women these days are more focused on a career and not committed to the motherly duties of the past such as talking care of the house, children, and cooking, etc. (most of you don't even know how to cook) Many of us who had good parents, know. Genuine femininity is rare and there are a lot of fakes in the church.
4. Many of us are saving ourselves for marriage, and we expect the same out of the other, which is beyond freaking rare. Churches are filled with single mothers who are looking for a guy to "settle down with" (hashtag, had a supper crazy party and sex filled youth and now I want you to take care of my problems with your money). Yes we are discriminating and we are using the Word of God to do it.
5. Many other reasons, just look into the recent creation and surge of the mens rights movement.
PS, something that really pisses me off about churches these days is how they are adding more women's groups and retreats and have removed all of the men's groups. -_-
Overall, yes were scared and are unlikely to move, especially if no solid indications are given.
Author- Some random Christian guy you will probably disregard
Wow...
ThatBrowser Sadly I agree with you.
Agreed bro.
youre right
My trust issues are so messed up that I wouldn’t know if a guy is serious or if they are playing
Good list of points, but you forgot the one I think that girls too often have a double standard for (as well as men, but it seem lately much more with women). There's a popular thing in christian women circles that teach that you shouldn't have to dress up nicely or put on make-up because he should just love you for who you are. But like you said with the horizons point; the reality is that while we know what God wants for us, often on both genders, looks come first.
We know that we wouldn't date someone who isn't gospel centered or believes in false doctrines, but the initial desire to talk to each other is 90% of the time based on looks (sorry but that's the world we live in, and there's no such thing as a Christian version of Prince Charming who likes you for who you are without thinking about looks). I personally believe that some women need to put in a little more effort. I've seen girls including my girlfriend, not dress nice or put any makeup on, and yet with not much thought put into it, they expect guys just to desire them right off the bat. The only reason I dated my girlfriend was because my family/brother and his gf tried to set me up. I personally thought she wasn't attractive at all at first and didn't expect us to go past the first two dates (yes...God was and still is exposing my idolatry with looks). But if they hadn't done that, I would never have dated her.
I get that for some women that sounds shallow, but I know plenty of christian women including gospel centered ones who wouldn't pursue a guy they had zero attraction to unless he really pushed them or had friends push them.
With so many options out there, it's easy to think you can do better, so why not aim for the hottest gospel centered mate you can find?
Thankfully God has shown me attraction that goes past looks and by the third date I was really exited to be dating her.
While I don't believe women should be dressing ungodly, and that they should guard the idolatry of looks, I do believe women who believe this bad teaching need to put more effort in to their looks and not have double standards.
Agreed... taking care of yourself is attractive. I wouldn't date a guy who looks like a slob all of the time. If you don't take care of yourself, that spreads throughout your life and it's going to affect the relationship in the long run. There's nothing wrong with wanting a woman who cares about looking her best.
#PREACH
I love your tips! I’ve definitely been wondering this myself as of late and this video was so helpful and needed. I absolutely agree on different timelines for different people. It’s a bit tough for me since most of my family were settled and married by the time they hit my current age but I keep reminding myself of timelines and God’s plan for me. I definitely need to work on my approachability because I tend to get “tunnel vision” when out in public and zone in on whatever I’m out to do. Lol. I feel like God is really helping me to transform as a person as I’m lately feeling more called to church and I’ve been getting way more involved than I had been previously. Things go the way he plans them and I trust in his will. Thanks again for all of your videos!
James is so funny! Loved the tips. Thank you!
Jessica De La Cruz are you Spanish? 😇
I literally googled the title of this video without knowing I'd find this. This was a God thing & I'm so grateful. You've got a new subscriber! It feels so good to be understood & recognized because some nights it's easier but others I wonder if I'm ever going to be loved by the right man, get married, have that happily ever after story. Thanks so much for this video!!! It's much needed & appreciated. This encourages me to be okay right now.
I stopped going to church turns out girls were asking about me after a little bit. The same girls that were cold towards me😔.
Of course they did. Because their "other options" had expired. Don't be a backburner doormat. 🙄
7:59 THIS IS KEY!!
You must mutually pursue each other. If one is pursuing more than the other, or no pursuit is happening from the other, your relationship is doomed to fail. If you can't talk it out and get on the same page, leave.
I speak from years of experience and heartbreak. You will bless yourself in the end if you don't put up with that nonsense.
Thank you so much for this video. I'm one of those girls you spoke about..word to word. Feels really nice to know I'm not alone. And your tips are simple yet very practical.
Hi Tiffany, I like your tips so much!! You and James speak in such an encouraging way. Thank you for the video!! You are amazing
Gosh she really was narrow in her focus, even down to the skin tone and height. Girls can make it so much harder for guys. Attraction is important but it doesnt come in a neat little box with specific instructions. So glad she changed her perspective!👏
I just found your channel & I love you guys!! You have such real honest advice. :)) thank you for shedding some light on issues like this. You guys are the cutest💕
His line, “That’s why you go to the chiropractor so much now, it ALL makes sense” is sooo funny 😂😂😂😂 what a sense of humor!
Hi, ive been single for 8 years after a divorce. I joined match dot com last week. I've sent 75 msgs to women since 10/1. And ive gotten very little return. Ive chatted with a few ppl but nobody really is interested. This is a good video bc women really ARE this picky. If a guy doesnt meet every requirement they have, he is dismissed. Its really frustrating, because ive opened up a bit too and gone for ppl i normally wouldnt go for, and still nothing. Im to the point in my life though where i dont care anymore if I meet someone, and I don't care what women think of me.
Im taking at least a week break frm match. It's really alot of work.
Dating sites are pointless for Men, women hold all the power in dating sites and the fact that they're picky and hypergamous it makes things worse. Dating sites basically stroke womens egos and make them into huge cunts because women Crave Attention and Validation. Which they can easily get on instagram, slutchat (snap chat lol) Fb, & Dating sites and get up to 10s or100s of guys overnight hitting them up meanwhile for us guys its like being in a desert looking for water to drink. Why else do you think women are so addicted to their phones? And Why else do you think women throw tantrums or are sad sometimes even cry even fucking suicidal ffs when they dont have their phones? Its because they cant see how many men are liking their pics or how many guys are tryna hit them up. The smart phone and internet was one of humans greatest inventions but combine that with an attention/ validation seeking bitch PLUS with the brainwashing of Feminism making women think they're Only Entitled the top 1% of guys because they're all supposed '' strong, equal, independant, goddesses''... Dating sites or better yet dating in general would be so much better for men if Feminism never existed and we probably wouldnt have a country full of Single Mothers too. The only thing Feminism ever did for Men was make it much easier to get some pussy without having to put a ring on it first, now the only problem is coming by Legal Virgins or just virgins in general cause nowdays women are having sex around the ages of 12 & 16 possibly younger meanwhile in the 50s this was unheard of. I bet Dating sites would've been great in the 50s but in todays time combined with feminism and the Rigged divorce courts that are in womens favor Plus the new #MeToo movement that has gotten several innocent mens lives ruined ona false rape accusation Dating in General is pointless. Sucks but this is the world we live in now and this is the environment women have created for all of us. im 20 and i guess i will never exp a relationship at all... A.I. Sexbots are looking better by the day once the West produce them Western women are so Fucked its too funny.
I messaged a woman and she asked for my interests so I told her and I got blocked.
The weirdest and most off putting thing that confused the hell out of me. I don't even want to touch a dating app anymore after that.
Aaron I'm a single Christian woman but I'm a single mom of 2 that got out of an abusive situation. I love Jesus and am devoted to serving God whether single or married but i have the desire for a godly husband. No one knows I'm a mom until i tell them and they're all interested but when they find that out it makes alot of them disappear. I feel like Christian men automatically disregard single mothers. And i would personally not touch online dating it scares me. I had one guy at my church show interest in me and make every effort to talk to and get to know me and i thought he was interested but come to find out he's been dating someone and brought her to church today. 😄 it's rough out there. I'm praying and trusting God to bring me someone who won't take advantage of me because i fall in love too easily. But from some of these comments I'm glad to be single. But you seem nice and genuine. Don't give up. There are good genuine women, but idk about online dating. Are you a believer? Apply God's word RUclips channel had alot of good advice for Christian singles.
It's so true that a deeper much more meaningful attraction comes from getting to know someone, doing life with them. Go on a day trip and see how they respond to you after being together all day.
When I first became a believer, way back in the late 1980's, I had a troubling first experience with single women in the church. I was attending a large church with a big singles ministry for young adults. When attending Sunday school and church, I immediately noticed something strange. There were lots of single men and women, but absolutely none of them were dating each other. The men were coming to church alone, and the women were dragging in unbelievers from off the streets. I had been a believer long enough that I knew this just wasn't right. I actually confronted several of the women about this issue and was told that "We love our fellow believing men like brothers, and are not interested in them romantically!" This certainly left a bad taste in my mouth for women in the church. It's no wonder they have relationship issues.....for some reason, they are continuing to fish in the toilet and are wondering why they are catching turds! It is unfortunate that even Christian women can't overcome their female nature. All men need to know that at the end of the day, a woman's female nature will override their Christian faith. I have seen it first hand in my own life.
I have noticed that as well. Church women want those "bad boys" sometimes even more so than the heathen women! Perhaps it's to later "depart from the unbeliever in peace" when the good Christian women no longer want heathen, unrestrained animal sex, "within the confines of marriage", don'tcha know. Then find the good, Christian beta bucks dude, and be, not only a wife, but his friend.
I've seen so many "Christian" women pull this stunt, it's become a stereotype.
+rednab2001 Interesting that the men are not dragging unbelieving women off the streets but are continuing to be faithful in their attendance besides. Could it be the case that the men know that you can't just change a woman just like that? The same is true for an unbelieving man; you're not going to just change a man because you have the magic vagina(which such purity would be controversial in itself). Nowhere in the New Testament does it teach us that's how the Church in the 1st Century grew.
It ought to surprise us that Christian women do not want to marry someone who's of the same mind, same spirit, and trying to go to the same eternal destination as they are. Wouldn't we think that marriage would be a lot easier and more enjoyable if it was more of an "army of two" instead of "one vs. one"? But there's a certain desire of women that we read about in Genesis 3:16.
Don't generalize!! Not all Christian church-going women are like that. I have gone on dates with guys at church who were believers and once they learned I wouldn't have premarital sex with them, they wanted nothing to do with me. Unfortunately, its said that 70% of people in church have premarital sex, and "some" Christian guys want to be part of those statistics. So it goes both ways. Also, the bitterness I'm reading in these comments are not very "Christian-like" behavior and rather insulting. Maybe its not the women that are the problem.
Glorfinniel you are correct that there is a lot of “the world” in the Church when it comes to sexual morality or lack there of. But the evidence I have seen shows me that women are much more willing to be unequally yoked than men are in the church. Currently, there is zero incentive for a man to marry anyone, and faith does not change that...and yes, women and their enablers are the problem. I champion male chastity if not married, and I no longer believe any man of faith should be marrying.
@@Agent1W Do you think this desire for women, leads them too want to have different ideals or ideas than there partner has?
I like what they mentioned about both people pursuing each other. I really have been miserable doing all the chasing.
I spent 6 years asking girls out between 2007 and 2013 and I got rejected every. single. time.
That's why I don't ask girls out anymore.
Don't lose hope. Maybe God was protecting you from really getting hurt. I know how you feel.
I feel so bad for you, they do all the time! They are miserable creatures unfortunately, now guys have other option go hay, because ladies are so cruel!!! Is that a plan of your God, of course not, evil plan to destroy God's families all over the world, making ladies feel like we were fishing in the toilet!!!
Go gay!!!
Shit dude. That's hard on psyche.
@Bronze LOL
Thank you for this video. It's encouraging to hear that there are others who feel and experience this! We can do this sistahs!
Love your videos , Tiff! You seem like such a kind spirit and I like that you aren't judgmental in your videos❤️
That is so encouraging. Thank you. :)
I’m dying!!!! So glad I found you. Ever since my last relationship I’ve been so uninterested in meeting guys and going on dates bc I feel like I’ve already done that. I think I really feel like “the one” is suppose to come knocking on my door. Soo, perhaps I should prolly make an effort to go out and meet em. 😖🥺🙄
You should just wait for Jehova's witnesses to knock on your door. Ask them if they're single = WIN
This video is golden and exactly what I needed. Thank you God for allowing me to see this. 😍😍😍
LaRae Monét so much to learn from and how are you?
Most men fear to approach women not because of the possibility of failure but because of the possibility of being hummiliated in public.Some women love doing that.If you do not correspont to a guy's feeling, try to tell that in a more respectfull manner.Thus the guy will learn from the experience and go for somebody else.It's simple.
Nope. It’s what I look like. I had no issue when I was thinner and prettier and younger. Plus I was told this by someone. Probably there are lots of things I could do to improve my looks. Need to wait until these things are DOABLE.
wow, thank you, i actually avoid thinking about relationships too much bc i’m finishing law school and i always tell myself it wouldn’t be the best time for that but sometimes i stop and think like, what is wrong with me? i’m almost 22, never even kissed a guy. but i saw myself in many of the “wrongs” you presented, i have high standards, i almost never go out, i’m not approachable, and i NEVER admit i have interest on someone bc i’m afraid of rejection, but the thing is i’m so uncomfortable around guys, i only had one male friend and he was gay so i just don’t know how to talk to them for example there’s this guy from my church i had a crush on and we know each other since kids so it shouldn’t be a problem but at one time we were praying together and i stuttered so much he probably thought i was an idiot, i don’t know i don’t have great social skills at all so its kind of easier for me to just don’t talk at all and being more closed bc i’m scared i’ll do something like that and ruin everything, idk, i know i’m very late to the video i just wanted to vent
Don't hang around with homosexuals. It puts heterosexual men off.
Lots of men are into sport. Consider getting into a sports team or at least watching sport so you've got something to talk about with men?
Oh I totally relate to this! When I had a crush on someone, I had such a hard time being myself (or acting "normal" lol) around them! I don't know if these videos would help in some way, but this one is about social anxiety - ruclips.net/video/VaWHLBRV39A/видео.html ... and this one is about tips for friends/meeting people -ruclips.net/video/Oeh870hCDVc/видео.html - I hope they can help in some way! :)
Larissa Strecht ... whatever you plan to do, get started on it.
You have such unbelievably high value right now. At 22 you have time. Time to find a good man, time to learn hot to flirt, time to meet and marry, time to enjoy each other's youth. Time before the kids come along. You have not been emotionally damaged by bad relationships yet, and you are fertile.
Make a study if it... you are smart. Use that. Study this problem on psychology literature and in life coaching books. Make up practice regimens for yourself to overcome your fears. Do demographic research to find you man.
Do it now.
At 30 the game changes and you lose value by the minute.
I say this as your brother... don't wait.
God bless
I've been with many women in my life, i had no fear of rejection what so ever.
I love it when a lady says hi to me with a smile along with eye contact.
I've done the asking with little effort but now I'll just sit and watch since the rules have changed over.
It's my turn to be approached now, and that to has happened several times.
I can so relate to your first tip and your story/example. I do that all the time and am currently working on that. Thank you for the video! I loved it ❤❤
I really liked the last tip cuz I feel like I'm assuming to much by asking a girl out I would rather a girl ask me that shows me she's interested I don't want to force a interest that's not there
After hearing a lot of No thanks I have given up and now I'm a lot happier.
“We don’t do subtle. I definitely speak for the male race there.”
True Comment: Love is all about one having great chemistry. If you have great chemistry, then you will find the love of your life.
What a cute couple just adorable 😄❤️🤗
I just found you on RUclips! You weren’t hidden, but revealed to me at the perfect time😊🎉. Thank you for your videos
Not Christian, but the best advice I could give a girl is to show that you are interested in their hobbies/interests. It is always better to get to know them and be friends with them before dating so that you know the good and bad qualities that they have. Being "friendly" does not tell a guy that you are interested in them. If you like music, go to local shows. Do you like video-games, anime, comics, etc. If you like science, there are events for that too. . Go to stuff like comic con. Guys like doing things/hobbies, so all you need is to find a place that allows people to meet with that particular interest. Also, plenty of girls act friendly, yet give a nasty, disgusted look when you ask them out like you took a crap right in front of her or something. Sure, being nice may help, but it doesn't tell a guy if you are interested or what your intentions will be if he does ask you out. I've asked plenty of girls out on dates and spent the money only to find out that what I did for them was all that they wanted from me. You have to be open to doing things that don't cost money, so that he also knows that you are interested in him as a person and not what he can do for you.
yup .. you never date . like like going to hostels traveling . you visit tourist spots together build friendship and memories that build feelings . be careful who jabbing out with it scares away opputurnety case people think hookingup dating . plus develop feelings . life trap is friend them . then they eventually fall in love with ya . get foot in the door . friends with people like or possibly date if things go south .. i bought this information . get a pool they come over for a swim . get horse pets ... no pressure or date they just visiting for fun and animals . then just happens . if you ask on date they run away . feel like have to get married . haha
I loved this video! I’m 21 years old and my expectations were so high, I wanted to be married at 18 with a tall guy who sings, in the worship team or doing service in church. I’ve never had a boyfriend, been kissed or had any romantic thing in my life. My mom told me that I was too cold and serious so guys were afraid to talk to me and I said to her that she was wrong but now that you said it that may be true. I really hope that I can meet the person that God has for me 😌
And a guy will love you for YOU too--some guys are drawn to more serious girls! :):)
Just be you and keep being a genuine person and the right man will come by.
paradigm clashes. i came from a nightmarish dysfunctional family, and the only girls that seemed drawn to me were all the ones i was not drawn to, and then after i got saved, its like, something got weirder, the girls i found attractive were attracted to me, but then paradigms became the problem...when we live in a culture where no one is repenting at all, and you are, then the issue becomes a sort of vibes thing, when they cant vibe off of you, then they dismiss you altogether. most men and women stick with what they know, even when it simply doesnt work, or its not what they really want. now that i know exactly what i really want, harder to find now.
*(waving) “yup, still can’t play guitar” 😂 I’m dying
I am just insanely traditional and I get rejection exists and guys are scared too, but I firmly believe men should be courting and that is really up to them to “make the first move.”
Love this video and I’ve just subscribed! I’m currently in a situation where I like a guy who I work with but he’s been single for 6 months after coming out of a 12 year relationship. We kind of flirt a lot in work, there’s a lot of playful banter and people have commented on it saying there’s “vibes” between us. I don’t know what to do to be honest
My best advice is to marry an older man. My husband is 20 years older than me and I highly recommend it.
He is mature, kind, patient, secure in his identity, has a real job, and doesn't chase other women.
Sorry, that is just way too gross for me. No, I won't date someone 20 years old. I won't date someone 5 years older then me. That isn't always gonna work. Just because it worked for you, doesn't mean it works for all.
It is so different from person to person. If your husband is mature, kind and doesn't follow other women it might be because of his own personality and also it depends on so many other factors. I think it has little to do with age. There are old men like men in their 50s and 60s who betray their wives.
Where did you meet?
@@nofybn7794 Sorry but you're gonna be old one day and everyone will think you're gross.
@@nofybn7794 You won't date a guy 5 years older but you will date a guy younger than you even if it more than 5 years. Praise God that an economic collapse is coming and women will marry whatever they can get their hands on to survive.
#4 Ohhhhh Nooooo!!!!!!😂😂😂
I could never... I’m toooo scarreeed
So true thanks for that. I just stick to church events but then I end up seeing the same people. Maybe if I tried widening my social circle I can find someone. You never know.
True - you never know! We actually made a video called 10 Places to Meet Guys! Here's the link if you're interested: ruclips.net/video/Oh0guCvV_tM/видео.html ❤️
Hi Tiffany, I was wondering could you do a video regarding attraction? I don't fully understand how to know when you feel attracted, and this makes me nervous to date anyone because I am afraid that I could be setting simply because I don't understand what I am supposed to feel.Thanks, have a blessed day.
Oh that's such a great question!! I think the feeling will be different for different people. I think, at least for me, it's this idea of being drawn to the person, to who they are as a whole person, and wanting to spend time with them. It's like this extra desire to spend a ton of time with this person. But that's just what it's like for me, it can feel differently for different people! :) And I think sometimes it's okay to start dating someone even if you're not sure if what you're feeling is attraction or not. I think it becomes clear with time.
Wow... I so needed this today!!! Thank you for sharing!! ♥️
Top reasons for not asking a girl out:
- I overheard you saying you don't want or don't know if you want children.
- I can't afford your debt.
-You're never single or date non-Christians.
- Not interested enough to carry a conversation. Example:
"Hey, (female), how are you doing?"
"I'm fine-"*walks off*
-You're not really mature or are self-absorbed: God does not appear to be the center of your life.
-Older and other Christians have actually told me to avoid you because of your reputation.
-I asked you out once and was turned down or saw you turn down others for superfluous reasons.
And now, having been called to missions, I can't accept anything less than a woman who is also called. Dating got a whole lot easier for me... there's just no one who fits at the moment.
There are church-going women, but few Godly women.
There are attractive women, but "wife material" is rare.
There are no "good" women, but the closest you can find is one who is accountable... which is still rare.
Trust me. Male or female, your life, your children's lives, and your eternities will be better off if you hold out for a Godly spouse. Never married, but definitely found out this truth the hard way.
I absolutely agreed with you Brother!
What the actual fuck
I’m a guy, just stumbled across this video, but I found the guys comments to be spot on!
And girls only fear rejection from the guys they want to date. But its not like theyre not being approached. Guys get regected and overlooked everyday depending on your status.
No, I can't ask a guy out, I know guys are very visual and if they aren't attracted to a woman they won't bother pursuing them.... it would hurt so bad if I asked a man out, and he only decided to date me cause I was there and not cause he was attracted to or interested in me.... guys taking the lead is what boosts my attraction in a man. I'm a girl btw.
This video is awesome I've been struggling a lot with the fact that I'm in my 20's and have never seriously dated anyone and my sister and best friend just got married so I've definitely been feeling the pressure 😂
lol Even Christian guys are becoming MGTOW.
Yup basically lol. Na, I'm open to dating but I'm not holding my breath either in life.
My too, i live in the states and find women have to high of expectations for guys and especially Christian men. I love Jesus but that just doesn’t seem to be enough
Truth!... Christian girls seem the same as non Christian
The Thinking Mans Game there are some good Christian girls out there but they do seem very picky and particular about who they date. Kinda have to be a stud or have a six figure job to impress most of them. I mean, life is what it is. There have been a few decent girls I’ve turned down because I simply wasn’t that attracted to them. It goes both ways sometimes.
@Pickel Sandwich they’re not all “ruined”. Just like how some Christian women find it very difficult to find a Christian man with good morals, not a sex demon, and respectful. Maybe it’s a case of looking for love in the wrong places? Idk but I do know that it’s way more challenging to find true real love (especially if you’re a follower of Christ) in today’s world. I see a lot of horrible men and women but I’m not going to shun half of the population and condemn them 🤦🏾♀️
your hair is so gorgeous
I'm 6'5" Still Single, Shy, and Quiet type
Learn to play the guitar. You won't be shy much longer... 🤣
Don’t worry you‘ve got legs 😉 I hope the video encouraged you to look for relationship in God first! That’s what I do! And when I am closed to God I don’t habe any lack.. I am sure you heard that before/ know that.. I just wanted to remind of that 🙃 kind regards and God bless! ❤️ Your future is gonna be lit with your God beside you assisting you in fulfilling your purpose ☺️😎❤️
Thank you so much for this video. I kind of teared up a bit because I FEEL THIS TOO AND I’VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT SO MUCH LATELY! The guy I like and I have a really sarcastic friendship right now. We are always joking around and poking fun at each other (in a nice way of course). But I’m always worried that since we have pretty different personalities, (I’m more calm, shy and mellow, and he’s loud, the most outgoing person I know, and energetic) that he thinks that I’m being serious and that I don’t care for him. And I never want to give him that idea because I’ve realized, especially lately, that I care for him so much more than I thought I did. I will definitely try to follow your advice and keep an open mind about it all, as well as a hopeful attitude. Just over this past year I’ve been getting to the age where a lot of my peers are dating. A lot of my friends are finding boyfriends and I’ve felt so caught behind and incapable of doing the same. There have been maybe one or two guys that have said that they liked me, but they didn’t know me. It was such a surface level thing. It didn’t feel right talking to them and I felt uncomfortable like I was being objectified or something because they only knew me from the outside. And I didn’t know them. I tried to give them a chance, but it wasn’t right to me. With the guy i like now, it feels more right. I don’t know where God is going to take this or what his plan is, but I feel like God is just calling me to pour into his life right now and be an encouragement. I don’t know if He’ll develop this into a long-lasting relationship or if we’ll stay friends but I know that this guy needs someone to care for him right now. Anyways, this comment got so off track. Thank you for this video though!
No guy is asking you out because that's no what guys do. Guys don't just go "ask out" girls and the ones that do are pursuing girls who are much much prettier than they are. You can literally dominate the dating sphere if you, as a girl, ask a guy out instead. This is coming from a guy.
Let me tell you, if you're waiting for a girl to ask you out, you're gonna be waiting a very long time. In fact, in the time you spend waiting for the girl to ask you out, she's being asked out by guys who aren't afraid.
They won't, because they don't want the guys that they have to ask out. It hurts their pride not being treated like a prize to be fought for.
@@xbbt7770 - Let me tell you,there are guys who just wait, and they are happy to wait because they are not going to let themselves be treated like that. Not "fear" , just being practical.
Usually what we envision in our mind is totally opposite of what we actually end up falling for
I just love hearing her speak, she has such a positive energy!
Awwww!!!! Thank you!!
You’re telling my story. Didn’t meet my husband until 39