Sonic Ordeal - "Car Keys" from album "Doohickey" (1998)

Band members...
Mark Trail - Lead vocals, looney lyrics, Tambourine.
Cap't Craig Redwine - Rhythm Guitar & Vocals.
George Ross - Lead Guitar, Keyboards & Vocals.
Alan Olmstead - Bass, spaghetti wiring & recording engineer/mixer, occasional trombonist.
Sheldon Reber - Drums & Percussion, Vocals, occasional sax.
Dedicated to our dear friend and missing comrade Craig Redwine... RIP.
All tracks were recorded "live" (initially to a stereo tape deck, and later to a four track R to R, and ultimately to an early 8-track digital ADAT system, then subsequently mixed and messed with)... with the exception of "Back at the Vista" and "Yodel Butt" which were multitrack & overdub efforts (way too much work!).
Sonic Ordeal is a band that was “together” (not a word usually associated with this group) for over twenty five years, and yet they have only actually played together for about sixty hours. Certainly not more than seventy-five. They have performed in public only three or four times. Public venues have included a pool-side party, a nicely-paneled garage and the Grange Hall in McKinleyville, California. They are shy of being eyeballed. The band got together every year or two or three for a recording session.
There is very little advance musical preparation, by design and ennui... Mark brings some lyrics written in advance and makes others up on the spot, occasionally singing what he thinks of as a “melody.” Sonic Ordeal is a band configured in the classic format of drums, bass, two guitars and a lead singer who holds a tambourine. Yes, just like the Rolling Stones but maybe more like Pere Ubu, except that we don’t know how many people are in Pere Ubu and we don’t know what they play, but they do have a fat guy who sings in a weird and limited voice, which is just like Sonic Ordeal. The other band members, Alan on bass, Sheldon on drums and Craig and George on guitars, are eerily similar to their counterparts in the original Rolling Stones, when Brian Jones was still alive.
In order to describe Sonic Ordeal, it is necessary to define the genres in which they record. Much of the music can be classified as “Surfgeezer”, with forays into “Surfgeezer Blues.” Many would call them a “garage band”, but they prefer the sub-genre, “Carport.” They can also be described as, “Hard Listening” (as opposed to “Easy Listening), which is appropriate, as people often find this band hard to listen to. This is particularly true among people who are talented musicians or those who have good pitch. In the field of “Mood Music” they would be found under “Bi-Polar.” They have also been referred to as, “Rock-and-Roll.” Ultimately, Sonic Ordeal is a Sub-Art, Double Garage Band that exists in the hope that someone rich and powerful will hear them and say, “Hey, that’s catchy!”, and then become their patron, enabling them to devote the rest of their lives (or what is left) to music.
Lyrics... (apologies to Mr Browne),
I lose my car keys everywhere...
When I go out I leave them there...
I lose my car keys everywhere...
Everywhere I go.
People say that I must be a dope...
Leave them somewhere, and then give up hope...
Alzieheimers got me by the head...
If I remember, I'll just stay in bed!
I lose my car keys everywhere...
I can just see them shining there...
Leather key chain with Hamms beer bear...
Everywhere I go.
Everywhere I go.
Out of my pocket in the nerf ball game...
Out of my rowboat in Lake Pontchartrain...
Out at the pet store buyin' my fish...
I can never seem to get my wish...
Faraway eyes, my hand goes slack...
Knowin' that my keys won't be comin' back...
Move my bike, ran up on the float...
Lose my keys everywhere I go...
People say that I must be real dense...
Lost so often, there is no defense...
Sometimes I lose my footwear too...
No shoes, no car, oh what will I do?
What will I do?..
I lose my car keys everywhere...
I visualize them shining there...
Leather key chain with Hamms beer bear...
Everywhere I go.
Everywhere I go.
Standin' in the market where I buy my cheese...
Take a lookin' down and I got no keys...
Peekin' all around where they might have dropped...
Tryin' to remember where else I walked...
Peakin' from the herb, honey from the bee...
Nothin' tastes as good as would my keys.
Trippin' down the aisles, spotin' somethin' shiny...
On my knees... I'm on my hiney...
I lose my keys!...
I lose my keys!...
I lose my car keys everywhere...
I lose my keys!...
Everywhere I go...
Everywhere I go...
everywhere I go... (soft)
everywhere I go... (softer)
(instr outro)
everywhere I go... (softer yet)
everywhere I go... (softest)

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*Promo sm*