Endless Space 2 Review | Jingoist Joy™ Edition
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- Опубликовано: 10 июн 2024
- The academy demands you pay reparations for your damage.
Outro is 'Overcharge' by Crt_head.
crthead.bandcamp.com/album/po...
Enjoy.
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Игры
That alien qt has two huge spheres of influence.
If you know what I mean...
She reminds me of a teacher I have classes with
Wayy too much influence
Wayy too much charisma
I will do any and everything
Tracts of Land.
@@R3GARnator *tracts of space
Reptilian alien honkers 👽 🎃🎃
"Are you just lonely?"
yes alien mommy
Thicc alien mommy, praise the dark gods!
The character designers knew what they were doing when creating her
@@Fulgrim2 not even a world bearer would approve this.
MILKY MILKY WARM AND TASTY!
MOMMY! MILKY! PLEASE BE HASTY!
REFRESHING DRINK FROM MOMMY’S UDDERS!
I WANT MOMMY’S AND NO OTHER’S!
GIVE IT! GIVE IT! GIVE IT NOW!
GIVE ME MILKY, LAZY SOW!
UNTIL YOU DO I’LL SCREAM I’LL SHOUT!
I’LL CRY I’LL WHINE AND STOMP ABOUT!
UNTIL MY BELLY IS FULL AND HAPPY!
I REFUSE TO TAKE A NAPPY!
Im about to press the EXTERMINATUS button over here.
The best thing about Horatio is that the leader of Horatio is a clone of Horatio that killed Horatio and Usurped him without anyone knowing that it happened.
he's speaking the language of gods
On side note, is this Mathdebating?
Which just begs the question...how many times has that possibly happened? For all we know they are constantly doing this and no one notices.
@@angelangelis8362 I think that’s the implication
@@angelangelis8362 Tbh I think it's at that point where the previous and current leader is essentially the same person in both mannerisms and habit. So in a sense it never happened.
the joke about "endless space historian" is even funnier now that Bungee is hiring a "destiny lore historian" for real
I'm sorry, they're doing *what*?
*pog*
They fucking what?
Imagine making intricate lore for your looter shooter,only to need the assistance of somebody with too much time on their hands,cramming as much of the entirety of said lore…into their tiny skull caverns.
Why would you need a historian for your own lore…when you yourself wrote it all?
(Yes I know that they have teams working on it but do you really need to hire a “historian” for this?)
Byf is a shoe-in
Genocide: I sleep
Being forced to work overtime: How dare you?!
This game is very realistic I see.
big brain
Tbh it makes some sense - as long as its other people being genocided, that sort of thing is easy to get away with with the right cultural values.
Thats exactly how unions work.
to be fair it's not genocide, the population numbers are forced to be static, not drop
@@lubieplacki2772 sounds like heresy
Nothing warms my heart like: “hey hey people...”
warms the cockles
Agreed
Ive started to use it IRL when meeting my friends.
makes me moist
i love this guy
Got the game. In my first few runs I didn’t know how to diplomatically reject the extortion efforts of the Cravers and Vodyani, so I ended up getting really good at upgrading my military in order to politely rout their militaries back into their homeworlds… and then taking over their homeworlds. In my second formal run, I played as the Umbral Choir and dumped everything into developing my economy. Imagine playing a game where no matter how hard everyone tries to make the largest economy, they are ALWAYS number 2 behind a faction that no one seems to have come into contact with. I literally made a shadow economy that everyone was baffled by because no one knew who was running it…
… But enough about the Merchant’s Guild. 10/10. Would corner the galactic economy again.
In my experience, it sounds like you played it right. It's not really "diplomacy" when they're shaking you down. The best way to deal with it is to make sure you can bomb them back to the Stone Age if they press the point - which they won't, if you're strong enough. I've never seen the Vodanyi AI opponent strong enough to pose a credible threat.
@@douglassun8456 they almost ALWAYS get wiped out first lol.
it's funny when you actually accept the Cravers' demands for dust, their attitude to you changes to "disgusted" and they respond "does your species have a spine"? after accepting your tribute.
@@douglassun8456 usually they dont ask for crazy amounts of dust, and sometimes you just dont give enough of a fuck to want to go to war with em
Merchants Guild, kek
"Given time - any problem can be solved. Given money any problem can be solved instantaneously"
I didn’t catch that until you wrote it down haha.
"They occupy just 10% of Nygean space-"
Oh boy here we go
Didn't realize star trek told the truth like that
Subtlety used to be a thing ..
Based
I was in tears when I got the reference
StarTrek quoted crime statistics before it was cool
>Gets Awakening for free
>Demand to take it back, and pay reparations
I AM, ONCE AGAIN, ASKING FOR YOUR FINANCIAL SUPPORT.
So Sseth was Isyander all along?
Awakening is actually pretty good if you get one of the workshop mods that prevents Isyander from expanding.
I usually just blast him off the face of universe
@@chuckles3116 Same, interesting mechanic in theory, but did horribly. They could have taken the academy in many different directions, a personal favorite as a galactic meeting ground. Once 3 or more races meet the academy, they propose it as a meeting ground for these different empires. You. could also make deals with them through backroom channels, for example, give them money, resources for more political power, away in galactic policy, or advanced tech.
This game really makes me get into the mindset of an imperialist despot. When I started setting up buffer states and brainwashing my citizens into begging me to set up a military industrial complex the world I live in started to make a whole lot more sense.
The best Space Putin simulator.
@@MinscFromBaldursGate92 Space US more like. Putin is a died in the wool humanitarian for waiting 8 years.
@@MinscFromBaldursGate92best america simulator too lol
As an Italian, this game completely encapsulates the Roman answer to the whole "An eye for an eye turns the whole world blind" which is that 1 you should never dish out an equal vengeance, alway retaliate 10 times harder and 2 preemptive attacks. They blockaded all our trade routes? Well, we need less ships in our military now, we are going to declare war, not now of course, we need 5 turns to park our armies right next to their major systems and then declare war when we are basically in orbit.
@@PostYourJaggahogin times of peace, prepare for war 💪
That colonizing gas giants question just got more hilarious since that one guy started complaining you couldn't land on Saturn in Starfield, and then doubled and tripled down on the complaint calling everyone who reminded him "You can't walk on a gas giant" of being nerds.
I legit came back to rewatch this review just cause of that idiot.
Got the game. First multiplayer game, someone said "leave me alone for a minute, I'm gonna "deal" with something." 20 minutes later the Academy's home system disappears in hellfire.
Amazing. Sounds like a real bro dealing with that shit.
Doing God’s work
what a fcking legend
Based and redpilled
What a fucking hero
"This game doesn´t work on national borders"
Proceeds to show a clip of isreali military
"Can you see any borders from up here? What have borders given us?"
Oops cant see the border with your recently bulldozed homes covering it
O p e n b o r d e r s f o r I s r a e l
I mean, even israeli military don't even know wheres their borders.
@@bluecaptainIT >
27:56 Now see I could understand adding that kind of system to the game, basically bribing Isyander to give your enrolled future leaders and top lieutenants preferential treatment and thus say level up faster or maybe get some sweet bonuses, that actually sounds neat. But who in the Fucking name of the Endless themselves thought it was a good idea to have the Academy be an aggressive, expansionist faction when the whole point of them is to be a (atleast on the surface) *'neutral' faction* that basically plays the other factions of each other through academic extortion and educational lobbying.
Also it would've been great to expand the bribery system so that when it comes to influencing the Academy's choices of curriculum and who got the best education at a given time to not just be soley based on whoever gave the most *"Dust" (money)* but could also be based on whoever made any number of notable donations to the Academy via technology shared, luxury goods *'gifted',* good'ole political backdoor dealings, and etc. That way it wouldn't just be the Lumeris gaining the upper hand most of the time when it came to bribing Isyander through sheer raw currency, there can be multiple was of gaining his favor to allow other factions to get on the action.
Imagine a bunch of cravers killing pirates for the academy. I certainly could see it.
@@stagdragon3978 That would make things interesting.
"Give my students preferential treatment or I'll obliterate the academy"
I quest if how they programmed the Academy faction even lines up with who Isyander is supose to be as a character
Making the academy a neutral faction is the better then having them be a annoying threat that's hyper aggressive and expansionist when that's not even how they're supose to act
Note: They fixed the academy.
Released today was a patch that lets you push a button in the pregame settings that makes it so they don't expand.
They also no longer aggressively attack players while at neutral relations.
"Who the hell colonizes a gas giant?"
Lando Calrissian: “Everything you’ve heard about me is true.”
Winning smile baby.
As I recall, someone desperate for Anti-matter, since it tends to spawn on gas giants. Also Vodyani, on occasion, because of the atypical way they handle "colonizing".
Of course, the game has changed a lot since I last played it, so who knows what it's like right now.
In reality, a gas giant has a crap ton of useful stuff. Supposedly there's a LOT of hydrocarbons in Jupiter's atmosphere, as a simple example, and those are damn handy even if you don't want to just burn them. Anybody with a decent manufacturing base for space travel is gonna have a field day mining gas giants. So Cloud City really wasn't too far off the mark after all.
Those without a sense of smell
Ok but seriously
Maybe a race used to low gravity.
Or just a temporary means of mining resources. Imagine we can just park a ship in atmosphere and start absorbing gases, instead of building structures on the surface and start mining. Though we would probably need to do both
"who the hell colonizes a gas giant"
me in starsector : "I need fuels"
"Moderator Note: Yes, this is Sseth. Yes, he has been banned for vandalizing the wiki."
time stamp?
@@AbelmcTrobel It's on the wiki if you got to his profile.
@@murilogomes4712 noice
Jack Frost funneh
they didnt clear everything he's added :p endless-space-2.fandom.com/wiki/The_Unfallen/Tutorials?oldid=5001
Rejoice, they fixed the academy!
How did they?
Why is his voice just immediately so humorous to listen to? Just a master comedic storyteller, I’m impressed
>"doesn't work on national borders"
>shows footage of Israelis
OY VEY
Stop noticing things.
What part of the video? I somehow missed it
7:00
Free Palestine
- How are you supposed to walk on a gas giant?
- Very carefully.
You don't walk on the gas giant. You just attach very resistant ropes to the uh... "unpaid and unskilled labour assistants" and toss em off the ship so they collect all the dust.
They probably just have suspended cities like cloud city in Star Wars. I think there was a project at one point to design a colonization ship of some sort for gas giant habitation.
Found this on wikipedia. "...Landis has proposed aerostat habitats followed by floating cities, based on the concept that breathable air (21:79 oxygen/nitrogen mixture) is a lifting gas in the dense carbon dioxide atmosphere, with over 60% of the lifting power that helium has on Earth.[10] In effect, a balloon full of human-breathable air would sustain itself and extra weight (such as a colony) in midair. At an altitude of 50 kilometres (31 mi) above the Venerian surface, the environment is the most Earth-like in the Solar System - a pressure of approximately 1 atm or 1000 hPa and temperatures in the 0 to 50 °C (273 to 323 K; 32 to 122 °F) range. Protection against cosmic radiation would be provided by the atmosphere above, with shielding mass equivalent to Earth's."
Mind you, gas giants and venus are pretty different, but with enough technology it'd probably be possible.
@@Guru_1092 Yes. They are pretty different. One of them has an average temperature of -145C and the atmospheric jet stream is faster than an actual turbojet airplane.
@@arlandblack1139 As I said, with enough science anything is possible!
It might be the inbred Norwegian in me, but my brain automatically answered "snow shoes".
I'm just as confused as anyone who reads this.
3 years later, they fixed the academy.
I do not know the specifics, what did they change about it?
@@minibotas9496 Kill pirates and you earn favor with the Academy. Supporting the Academy can gain favor. Favor can be used to buy their systems, receive a faction specific buff, gain a fleet, and learn about enemy heroes.
@@faux9694
So… the Academy still expands? Even through your own territory?
@@minibotas9496 not that I've noticed. They mainly expand in empty territories and won't attack yours. You can turn their expansionism off in the options.
@@faux9694 that was my only worry. Neat!
I played a little of this recently and I might end up liking it more than Civilization. The sci fi theme and alien races are more entertaining and I really enjoy the diplomacy system.
Попробуй мод
"Beyond earth"
"the sophons are a race of intellectuals - despite this, they talk in a british accent"
crying
16:46
Shots fired. I caught that one, too.
I deadass laughed out loud
so with 600 likes, DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT THE END SOUNDTRACK IS?
@@WeebRemover4500 its Overcharge
by CRT_HEAD
Man, i have to check up on ES2 wiki to read about the sophons. Im curious if they were inspired by the sophons in the "Three Body Problem" book trilogy. Really great shit.
Congrats, in 4 hours "hey hey people" has become one of the top steam reviews.
they're so stupid.
Congrats! ruclips.net/video/QsR8zBh6EdE/видео.html
It is a stamp of approval
Sseth effect
A perfect example of how utterly useless steam reviews are.
Good news: they updated the Awakening DLC and it is actually fun to play now. Back then I just left it disabled all the time, but now that's no longer the case. It's definitely worth revisiting.
Tree Communism, coming soon to a system near you.
How's it feel to know the devs are working on a massive update to re-work Awakening's mechanics, probably in no small part because of this very video and its popularity?
They saw Milei's stance on the age of consent and are removing all Argentinian influence as fast as they can lel
updates pretty fire, with the academy knowing their damn place and not expanding and the reworked weapons being more balanced. The only issue is that it consistently fails to load the turn where you choose whether to side with or against isandyr in his last quest section. usually around turn 65-75 on fast speed, so you gotta hit victory before then. Fingers crossed thats fixed when it leaves the beta.
Horatio has learned of an assassination plot against former system governor Horatio masterminded by former Horatio Prime Senator Horatio. Horatio was reportedly heard raving that he knew Horatio’s finger prints were all over the plan to kill Horatio and signed an executive order authorizing Horatio to assassinate Horatio before Horatio could give Horatio the go ahead to have Horatio assassinate Horatio.
this is a masterpiece
An wonderful onion video it is
I don't know if this is a shitpost by someone who is not familiar with the game, or someone who is familiar explaining it. It's pretty accurate.
peak roger a muirebe from ck2 here
This begs for that fkin Pirates of the Careabian pick from At the world's end
Fish Mom: "Are you just lonely?!"
Me: "...Yes."
stolen comment
@@thatchedrooves1204 >Getting mad bout something being stolen on the internet.
Ara ara
Fish mommyyyyy
She a thicc fish tho
Rewatching this video, realizing he was using "First Trumpet" as the music for explanation of what dust actually is, and now I wish seth did a review for Lobo Corp or Ruina- it'd be, phantasmal
I can never get over just how fucking good the Riftborn intro cinematic and music is
bro i cream whenever the vaulter theme song arrives in my spotify playlists
@@syrusalder7795 a certified hood classic
I love the concept of a guy so narcissistic he created an entire race of himself.
That is basically Hord Prime from the 2018 She-ra.
Even gets the bonus points for being able to assume direct control.
so, jesus?
Isn't that what the Judeo-Christian god did?
Sseth didn't mention that splicing is at first done by bringing alien genes INTO Horatio. At first. So he's also human Zerg.
Too much poly or an- devas here, PIE to be bright
17:04 I just noticed the Hissho were offered 150000 Dust for a single mushroom.
And declined it.
its a very important mushroom.
No, that confirms it, this is Stellaris in HD.
Anyone knows how crazy samurais are when it's about mushrooms
THERE IS NO HONOR IN SURRENDERING ONES MUSHROOM
Looks like a very detailed reincarnation of Civilization AI.
3:01 Yagoo's plan compressed into a sentence.
It's always entertaining when you play more indie games and occasionally recognize their OSTs in Sseth's videos much later upon rewatch, especially when Sseth hasn't made a video about them yet.
Like what?
Shadowrun Returns @@user-cs4su3ng9l
When sseth was talking about dust, he used First Trumpet music track from Lobotomy corporation
The project moon brainrot is real bro
“The Emperor does not ask, _he commands”_
Just like the Merchant's Guild itself.
Influence Buyout
AKA
The Power to Have Things Just Because You Want Them™
Me: "I don't know, large scale civilization sims aren't my strongest suit for extensive gameplay time..."
Sseth: "Big tiddy fish-mommy"
Me: "Say no more, it's in the shopping cart."
Sseth in Wizardry 6: Damn, that's a good looking fish.
Sseth in Endless Space 2: Damn, that's a nice looking fish.
@@MinscFromBaldursGate92 Mandalore in Genesis Rising: Is he going for the fish?
yes i am addicted to masturbation how can you tell
For anyone wondering now, the Academy and Isyander have been nerfed and there are options to control his influence on the game so you can play with Nakalim without Isyander. I do recommend playing with him but at a reduced level. The idea of the academy taking territory is idiotic from any point of view, but the recent patch is a nice compromise.
Isyander: "once again, give me your funds"
Any sane player: *constructs obliterator* "oh ill give you something alright...."
"once again, give me your NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
exactly fuck academy their systems will be yours... btw they dont mind if you mine on uncolonized planets....
Solar System? More like Solar BBQ
Imagine the academy spawn into a multiplayer game and instead of convincing them to compete each other for his favor, Isandyr just got shelled to dead by player made obliterator
OnCe AgAiN, iM aSkInG fOr YoUr FiNaNcIaL sUpPoRt
"Big-titty fish-mommy is gonna buy the galaxy...and I'm gonna help her."
Jenestra Omalfi'Meos vs. Lady Dimistrescu.
Rule 34 will explode.
Always knew Sseth was a Ugandan warlord of culture.
@@thegrayyernaut unfortunately not as popular as Dimitrescu, though I wish.
She totally saved my butt in my first non-tutorial game.
I was getting invaded by the Imperials but I had enough gold to buy a planet off her and practically restart my civ where I could build my Obelisks in relative peace
Milk truck is coming to town
I heard the First Trumpet OST in there and now I'm excited for a Lobotomy Corp video potentially
The phrase "Nanite Augmented Crackheads" sends me every time
"How are we meant to walk on a Gas Giant?"
*"Very Carefully."*
Your pfp fits that comment so well
That killed me xD
Like always
It will never cease to amaze me how this man can string together several minutes of stupid jokes and simultaneously produce some of the best, most in-depth and genuine reviews out there.
For real, it must take him ages to script these videos.
@@lukoscreyden or he's a god and dont even need to try
I rewatch this again after bought this game yesterday and watch whole 3 hrs new player guide video and this one is much more understandable and practical.
no one like further because funny internet number
Shitposting is a pathway to many abilities, some considered to be unnatural
Walking "very carefully" on a glass giant still makes me die every time.
Coming back I now see that Szeth was 3 years ahead of the Starfield gas giant meme
“How are we gonna walk on a gas giant?” “Very carefully “
He guys i got the joke - he is refering to the video of ssethtzeentach where he talks about colonizing the gas giant haha so funny
OMG! DID WE JUST WATCH THE SAME VIDEO???
@@secretname2670 you guys are fun at partys
just land on the hard surface that's probably underneath all that gas and hold your breath lol duh
@@thelitmango6333 we at least get invited to some you sad nut.
When Sseth buys a legal copy from this decade, ill give the game a try.
lol
where is the codex?
also then try synthetik! ^^
15 men on a dead men's chest
30:21@@cristyanandresceleminmurci1455
The re-educate and re- integrate to the soil part was METAL
10:10 I kneel Sseth-sama, that joke was somehow yet another good prediction(he didn't even get cancer, just a melanoma around his mole at one of his feet).
Ok I'm sold on sexy Horatio clone civilization
Empire of the Autist Cat when?
Sub-race is SS boy and Sean Bean is from the academy.
@@ol_fortune9474 don't forget jauffers
Horatio, formerly known as Wilburgur
AftermathRV Horatio is the final evolution of Autisim Cat, The Daedric God of Madness
"What happened to the Endless? Well there's less of them, The End"
Best, BRIEF, Summary of a story...
They basically fixed the Awakening DLC... Sseth has the POWAAA!!!
Damn that 4x explanation made me come back once again just to listen to it. It is so well made
"re-educate, and reintegrate..."
I wonder where he's going with this
"Into the fucking ground."
*Add to cart*
Haha
Thats the spirit
into the fucking soil
"re-educate, and reisemenate..."
"smiling empireum solder in the background "
"H-how are we meant to walk on a giant gas giant?"
"Very carefully"
That got me
When you search for the song in the outro of this video you will find this video so I have come full circle and will continue the loop for all eternity!
How the hell did Sseth predict Ninja getting cancer, and even predicted that he got Melanoma. That is scary.
"Between death and inconvenience i choose oblivion" this really speaks to me.
Yeah that one is relatable
no existence = no flaws
You wanna excercise, meditate, acquire knowledge, reach out to your fellow man, discipline and mold yourself into a better version of who you are?..... or, what is that? A gun you say?! Remember Sisiphus only keeps rolling that boulder up the hill because he's a brain dead jock that enjoys the work out.
"Re-Educating the natives and Re-Intergrating them... into the fucking soil"
Damn that is a good line
The image of an Imperium of Man Guardsman laughing is the perfect summary
Have a purity seal, loyal subject of the Imperium.
#justimperialthings
12:33
I read that horribly wrong
I would love to watch a long running Scifi series set in the Endless Space universe.
I was very surprised to find that Jingoist Joy is the actual name of a militarist law you can pass
They announced a Horatio dating sim as a joke. Then they actually made it after fan demand, it's called Love Thyself. 😂😂🤣
time to spend some money
@@sparkyboi4387 No need, it's free.
@@thundersheild926 even FUCKING BETTER
For once mob mentality made an objectively good thing happen.
It's mindblowing how his little shitpost channel evolved into a legit, high quality game review channel. He's now a powerhouse of indie gaming market, a burning sun chariot that can lift any game's sales up if the game has unique playable value to it. Powered by independent funds of the merchant guild, nay, the merchant nation. Israel itself. And the videos he produces deserves every penny comes in his way.
God bless this man.
G_d bless this man*
I think its because Seth is a very, very smart man who roleplays as idiot/shitposter (see one of his recent stream for an in-depth lecture on immunology for example). Other people make the mistake of thinking they are the same when actually they are idiots roleplaying as geniuses, which fails inevitably.
Allah bless this man
He's Apollo, bright in incandescence, and we are not worthy!
Being akin to Israel is the only non based part of this community, proud of u guys and Sseth.
Great review of Eve Online Sseth, I love all the clever edits to bring an even more vibrant atmosphere to the game and all the story additions, man I didn't even know all these races existed in eve online and I've seen so many lore videos on EVE Online. Thank you Sseth, will definitely check this game out.
Edit: They changed the game category
Your almost two year old review of this game made me buy most of the DLCs, already had the game. Cheers!
Oh wow, he got his password back from those travelling merchants!
Oy Gevalt.....
Rootles metropolitans
Those dancing movers
When the world needed him most he returned
he uploads fairly consistently
@@elperronimo the world needs him most every time
@@LeeroyFan101 Streaming for a month put him behind schedule and he didn't do anything during that. His contents are always high production quality that requires huge amount of time, so a month per upload is reasonable.
I received more in game knowledge from your review than from all the "beginner" tutorials I watched.
20:01 someone might still be watching this, anyone knows that soundtrack when "the united empire" hits?
Fucking found it, took me ages
CRT_HEAD Gunstar Heroes
@@adalet127 a hero we dont deserve but the one we need
*Endless Space 2 In a Nutshell*
You: Yo, who just put a pirate mark on me?
Friend 1: Idk wasn't me
Friend 2: Not me
Friend 3: Ain't me
*War it is*
AI: Yes, yes, fight stupid humans.
There's a multiplayer mode?
@@SympleSymon well you watch the video right ?
I always love how games too hard for me are nothing for Sseth and he's explaining everything in way I can understand
Respect my man
Sseth is legit actually extraordinarily intelligent, with a masters(?) in biology or something. He's way smarter than me, and probably most RUclipsrs I watch.
@@Nightweaver1 his habit of figuring out how to exploit practically every game he plays is a big sign of how smart he is
Friday Monday Seth when he sees there’s an economy in the game: how can I reach peak capitalism or genocide
@@khurelbatbayanbat7913 In stallaris you do both at the same time
@@Nightweaver1 Masters in Immunology. Which is an extremely hard degree btw.
"the endless, decided to end eachother" how did i miss that joke
This review convinced me to get the game and I have been regularly playing it for almost 2 years now. I also come back to watch this review often because it never stops being funny. Good shit my man
“Make up only 10% of the population but 80% of prison populations”
“Maybe they commit more crimes”
O.O
BenkaransLivesMatter!
they do
Very bold to say Mr. Paris~
What the fuck, this was an actual line in the show?
He's right.
"Amphibious Mommy Milkers" -Dad
The artistic twin of Stellaris.
“Are you just lonely” she knows me so well
Science: "Female armpit inspector"
Yes this is true
dream job
Dammit, Touhou still exists
@@Dan-gs3kg Every day I'm reminded of Reimu fans existing makes me wish to be isekai'd straight to hell. But then it's remedied by the fact that there are some guro touhou fans out there. Balanced, as all things should be.
@@Dan-gs3kg that gif has destroyed hundreds of thousands of lives
@@moltementi279 Touhou armpits gif? Where!? I need it for scientific research!
"Who the hell colonizes a gas giant?"
*[Isaac Arthur laughing in the distance]*
I did it in Starsector.
It wasn't a good idea.
Then I colonized the sun.
That crashed the game.
Love Isaac Arthur
Dont you mean *waughs in disthance* ?
based
In the dark, far, flung, future, there is only ballsack sucking, and nutsack economics. The world has devolved into a new dark age, where Doomguy has taken full control of the major countries of the world. Enforcing his totalitarian rules against Fanta nut, and strictly banning all physical copies of Ordovician Penis Fight 2000. The earth has been scorched, and degraded, cities lay in ruin, lives destroyed, all of this unimaginable pain and suffering, because nobody can get a nice nut going. But, out of the ruins of a destroyed world, out of the dirt and blood, a hero rises. A hero who will challenge Doomguy, and bring peace to everyone's balls.
The earth stretched around for miles, completely barren, nothing but cracked and degraded soil. In the distant horizon, the sky loomed, grey and drab. Star Trek nut crack penis. A massive, collom of inky smoke twisted and curled upwards in the distance. Dr Nutsack crouched down, observing the cruel smoke from afar. He knew its presence could only mean one thing, Penis Bandits, and lots of them.
Dr Nutsack sat down on the dry earth, and began to lay out his supplies. One Aegirocassis Prostate, his trusty hunting rifle, with one remaining magazine, which in turn, housed five rounds, and only two remaining essential oil bottles. He made a mental note to get another fix from the Anti-Vax Guild. A dangerous group to be sure, but few could get far out here without their fix of essential oils.
Dr Nutsack sighed deeply, packed up his supplies, dusted himself off, and cracked his knuckles. He gazed into the unfriendly horizon, contemplating his next move.
“Screw it.” He thought. He took out a vile of essential oil, turning it over in his hand for a moment. Suddenly he popped the top off, and drained the vile, dropping the vile after he was done. He smelled dat homie booty, easy acess penis nut sauce.
The familiar feeling overcame him, his blood seemed to solidify, it felt to become thicker and warmer. Every neuron fired simultaneously in his head, but the only feeling he felt was the overwhelming sense of adrenaline pumping through his veins. His penis got a bit hard not going to lie, his balls were pretty fat but fresh doe, his nuts were not as large as Dwayne The Cock Johnson testie sucker 8000.
Dr Nutsack ran toward the smoke, nae, he glided toward the dark horizon. The land melted around him, his feet barely touched the ground. Suddenly, The Penis Bandits popped up in front of his vision, he wasn’t going fast enough! Dr Nutsack knew he had to do something quickly. He whipped out his pinkie finger and stuck it in his booty hole, inducing a massive, titanic juicy fart. The fart ripped right through Dr Nutsacks pants, the noise of the fart was so loud it created a sonic boom that burst Dr Nutsacks eardrums and immediately ripped off all his nutsack hair. The fart left a huge brown vapor tale trailing behind Dr Nutsaks thick booty cheeks, and launching him thirty feet into the air, where he flew right over the Penis Bandits, like that one scene from the movie E.T, where the alien sucked a fat pee pee hole.
He flew fifty feet straight over the Penis Bandits, his body flailing and turning uncontrollably. Dr Nutsack then flew straight, head first toward the ground. For a few seconds, comprehension entered Dr Nutsack's mind, this was the end. He closed his eyes, he was completely at peace with the world. Then he hit the ground with the force of a train driving off a one-thousand foot cliff, and freaking died. Gorilla nutsack pee pee fart hole jerry from ass and morty nutsack penis diper.
Then a portal opened up, and Metroid walked out, scratching his nuts and looking around the barren landscape.
“Wait, whats going on- where am I?” He said, as the Penis Bandits looked over, and shot him multiple times point blank with Spaz-14’s directly in his nutsack. Metroid started poo poo fart ppee pee nut jake the fart dog from star nutsack return of obama’s prostate blue whale testie how to ask google if i need a nutsack fart doo doo pee pee holw gay butt iron man loves iran police fortunate cookies wee wee wong le gong fong fart sharut nut cole is that awlter supported vote nutsack joe from obama testicle gong diper penis from gravity fall s not ttoo be confused with cgravity grey nutsack i love cum te lmao lmao not going lie homie niggil that pretty gay not doe to go penis penis
Suddenly a second portal opened up, and out walked the looming, massive, 60 foot tall figure of Joe Penis, naked and fully erect. Nobody had seen Joe Penis in over a year, since Doomguy had established the local Penis police, who stopped everyone from getting a nice nut going. Many had lost hope all together, and believed Joe Penis to be dead.
Joe Penis looked down upon the five Penis Bandits, and he noticed the bodies of dr Nutsack and Metroid.
“No, no! This can’t be real, this can’t be happening! My lover metroid, and Dr Nutsack, my pee pee inspector! No! You animals! You killed them both!”
Joe Penis began to shake with anger, his eyes glowed red, his titanic schlong casting a shadow over all of the Penis Bandits. He roundhouse kicked one of the Penis Bandits into the stratosphere. The other Penis bandits got scared and went pee pee poo poo in their pants. Then Penis Joe busted a gigantic fat nut and drowned them in it lmao. society h3h3 pee pee poo poo nutcrack, monster nut juice darth vader has a thick booty not going to lie :blushing emoji: :pee pee emoji: morgan freedom pupic hair finna smells like dorito nutsack lah mayo, ballsack jones came home to see his cat busting a fat nutsack on dat homie mog goo goo ga ga penis fartsack joe rogayanergeranadhemphargitegergorgan question mark
"Your chance of success depends entirely on if you have replaced your troops with a Mobile Suit Gundam"
Thankfully the Academy revamp has itself been revamped with the (Re)Awakening update to be considerably less of a pain in the ass. The update is technically still in beta due to localization issues, but according to one of the patch devs on the steam forums its fully complete and functional.
i just started the game but i turned off awaking after hearing the horror stories, is the rework worth using?
@@connorwright2787 Apparently it greatly tones down the Academy's aggression so long as you don't go out of your way to actively piss them off, as well as give the Nakalim various buffs.
@@TSFF18 thanks for the explanation I'll keep them turned on then and see how I fair
That line "Between death and inconvenience, I choose oblivion" is 2020 in a nutshell.
Yep.
“Are you just Lonely?”
*looks down in shame*
At her bust, yes
@@Intestine_Ballin-ism XD
Damn even NPCs see right through me
They listened to you and unfucked the academy!
3 years late tho
Wait really? What did they do?
@@viewtifuljoe4412 my dad
I was having lunch at work, and this video happenned to be the last page I had opened on my phone since the last time I had used it. So i started watching the video from where I left it, but with no audio, since my colleagues were next to me. A truly eye opening experience, 10/10 would do it again
"in multiplayer you're going to desync before anyone gets angry"
it really IS civ in space
"Do you want diplomacy to not even be an option?"
The Imperium of man:
I'm interested
If you think you are useless, there are diplomats in the Imperium of Man
Wind Gui I guess somebody has to write the war declarations xD
@@walaogui This is the stupidest shit I've ever heard and I'm not surprised at all.
*EPIC GAMER MOMENT*
THE EMPEROR PROTECTS
I watched this masterpiece 10+ times , watched all the reactions to it and most likely do will keep doing it. It is your magnum opus sseth 10/10
Oi guys, Amplitude finally updated the game and fixed Awakening. The Nakalim are less dumb now, and the Academy can now be tweaked to make them less annoying. Took them long enough.
Update: WeedLord420 has been banned for vandalizing the Wiki.
Took them a while
@@synphilia4776 Well, there are only 2 admins iirc
Krekky might be sympathetic either way.
I almost always put this video om when sleeping home alone because sseths voice is so calming.
To anyone watching this now
The awakening section is out of date
The devs fixed the dlc after 4 years
What kind of Heroes of Might and Magic is this?
The one in space.
heroes of poo poo and pee pee LOL ehehehehehehhe
Did not expect to see you here
simply ebin have an updoot and some leddit lead
How are you everywhere?
it's almost impossible to not role play as the imperium of man in literally every single space strategy games ever
“-*reeducating*, and, *reintegrating*, the *native population*... into the F U C K I N G S O I L.”
-Ssethtzeentach, Hero of the Imperium
Just put a mod ho swap the red from the imerials with gold.
It's exactly the other way around. Why would you ever want to be a space hitler?
@@DoctressCalibrator cuz its fun to kill all alien life becouse humanity is the best race ever
Obviously us humans are going to naturally conquer... It’s literally in our DNA
This Is hands down is the funniest most down to the detail type of review I've ever watch! I want this game now.
Coming back after they finally fixed the Awakening DLC
"Big tiddy fish mommy?"
*Looks over to Undyne, Ariel, Mako, and every other scaly waifu.*
"You've been replaced, get out."
remind me who this Mako is?
I love your pfp, lmao I love that comic
@@chesterstevens8870 I forgot about that "game" mako definitely best girl
@Mialisus ya i can't believe people still give him any money. Wont hire any extra help and release like what a text update every couple of months. I just pirated the latest version and called it good
@Mialisus does MG project actually have a team or is it just one guy cause if its the latter im gonna keep away from it
"much like the scottish , Trees are rooted to the ground they dont do much"
lol you forgot to mention refusing sobriety
Can you blame them though? With neighbours like theirs it's no surprise!
@@L1mJahey you're true mate, very fucking true
haha alcohol goes glup glup
The name checks out