Keep in mind the only the whole reason the Doom guy was on that was on Mars in the first place was because he punched his commanding officer in the face after said commanding officer told doom guy to fire on civilians Then when dude I got back to Earth he found his hometown destroyed his wife did and his bunny's head on a stick and he went ballistic
There are two human staff you never want to meet in anger, the first is the Butler, but by far the more dangerous is the Nanny, they have been utterly destroying nightmare creatures that threaten their charges sanity for centuries (there is a reason those creatures hide under beds and in wardrobes), if you threaten their charges you will discover that even an elderly nanny, with nothing more than a walking stick, is more deadly than a platoon of well trained heavily armed special forces
threaten the nanny's charges or the mothers cubs and watch why humans trained warriors respects any parental figure among their kin as even if on the brink of death they rip the fussion core out of your own ship to force it down your throat before letting out a howl that shatter asteroids... and then then.. the choir of roars will tell you how not just you will die.. but everyone and everything that hade anything to do with your attack on the young..
There was one story where aliens came to take a colony, and by sheer coincidence, a rival colony on the planet sent a force to take the same colony. As soon as the aliens tried to target a kid to quell the inhabitants the rival force helped the colony out.
Reminded me of something way, way back in 1987. An 18-month old girl fell down a well in Texas. The well was an 8in diameter pipe - she was 20+ft below ground. Rescuers & equipment poured in and the nation's attention was focused on saving a single little girl. This story ain't wrong. She was named Jessica Morales - or Baby Jessica. I think there was a movie.
Yep. I remember the incident clearly. Too bad the name of the man who rescued her isn't also remembered. What he had to do to get to her was nothing short of heroic.
I remember as a kid, watching a news broadcast about a woman in a VW bug who was involved in an accident. When she came to on the side of the road, she began asking about her baby. People informed her that her baby was trapped under the car, and that police and firetrucks were on their way. She tried to get to her baby, but several of the men said no no no don’t! And tried to keep her away, she shoved them, three or four full grown men, out of the way, rushed to the car, lifted and rolled it to the side to get to her baby, who was just fine!
"regardless of species" Yeah my first instinct when seeing even a little delivery robot get attacked was "HELP HIM" this is probably true. Wonder if caring for the young of any species or anything we ascribe those emotions to is because of our dependence on animals we've domesticated. Possibly not a common thing in the galaxy
A combination of self preservation, empathy, attachment due to pack bonding, and our uncanny obsession with cute things, leads to us viewing anything weaker, smaller, or just pretty to look at, as something that must be defended. Just like how people will tie themselves to trees in the name of protection, we also will throw hands with God himself if a baby of any species is threatened with harm or death in our presence.
@@slademmxii8759 This is giving me flashbacks to that one time I fell down the youtube rabbit hole of baby animal rescue videos... some done by professionals, but mostly just, gosling gets stuck in a fence, helping ducks over the curb, kittens jumping out of the grass or doing cpr on one frozen in the snow... there's definitely something there. Funny that the examples I can remember are all waterfowl and cats though.
@@slademmxii8759the cute things not so much. Haven’t some soldiers broken down when their robot drone that’s used to check for explosives gets blown up? We as a species have a tendency to get upset when stuff we depend on gets fucked up
Humans babies are by far one of the most helpless infants on earth. Most animals can walk shortly after infancy. A human baby only has one survival instinct from the start and that is “make a noise summon help” because of this we are typically sympathetic to things that are cute and small
If you think about us compared to other species on our planet, our care for the young is remarkable. It takes years for our young to even be capable, so that empathy to protect is a lot stronger than any other species
@@Genesis23OPBthere's a story where a father with his two bare hand lift and flip over a car to saves his daughter. They're both hospitalized, the father dislocated his shoulder bone and tears his muscle in all 4 limbs. But the daughter survives
40 years ago, my friend and I were camping in The Lake District, in England. We decided to take 'a shortcut' back to our campsite through an empty field. We did not see the bull. It charged. We both legged it towards a hedge and leapt over, into the adjoining field. That hedge was at least six feet high and four feet wide and we hardly grazed the top of it. We couldn't have done it again for a million pounds.
Developing on a planet with cave lions, dire wolves, crocodiles and other incredible perdators and becoming the apex predator above even the most powerful and fierce of them probably has something to do with that. I watched a vid of a Mama Elephant Stomping a Crocodile to Death. You could hardly tell what it was when she was done. Harming the young of any species on Earth risks a gruesome and quick death. Some species will eat you afterwards. But not humans or elephants.
As a baby my families golden retriever Annie, damn near killed a friends dog who came over to sniff me. Annie was a big rug most days. A huge lovable rug that never even growled at anyone. But I was her baby and that dog got too close
yeah, it's a fun little thing, most mammals are instinctually able to recognize the young of even other species and know to be wary even though a defenseless baby would otherwise make for an easy meal since it often means that an aggressive mother is nearby.
Well, any creatures hailed from Earth has this quality on some degree - maybe the insectoid ones less, as they has enough kids, and they will be mostly drones, but any bird or mammal species, and even most of the reptiles do care of their youngs. And on Earth, there is no species, who has absolutely no predators, even if for some the said predator is also a prey species. Which also explains, why we doesn't back down so easily, when we are threatened...
If he had included how incarcerated criminals that had been harmed as juveniles sometimes kill their fellow criminals if they become aware of their past actions, and though not encouraged by their justice system, they do act as if it were foreseeable outcome, that would have also demonstrated the depth of the instinct.
This is why I like HFY. This story (and reading) had me cheering and even crying. HFY! Even just that someone came up with and wrote this, and shared it, makes me so happy to be human!
@@kingmasterlord This wasn't overboard at all. I have witnessed an 80lb waif woman lift the back half of an F-250 up so her child that was stuck under it could get out. By the time those of us nearby recognized what was going on and running over she dropped it down and collapsed. She cracked more than a few vertebrae and tore several of her muscles. I heard it took her almost a year to recover. Do not test a humans ability to ignore the body's self imposed restrictions to accomplish the impossible. It isn't just adrenaline, though that is a component of it. Our body has dopamine, adrenaline, and endorphins that allow us to reach the peak of our restrictions. What lets you push past even that? When you are rushing to help another. Every time we see someone pushing past what should even be physically possible for them, it is ALWAYS when they are focused for another. Those able to access this for self survival are very rare, and this usually only happens when extreme anger is present. Humans are incredibly insane when it comes to what they can accomplish when they are protecting something. With guns being a thing this doesn't seem to help so much, but once you get into a melee? Oh it most certainly does.
Humans use, at maximum, 80% of their bodies strength until the brain decides otherwise and then we are capable of tremendous acts of physical activity but at a cost to our bodies. Our muscles can shatter our bones and teeth when this happens. Hysterical strength.
I know a person who could calculate the amount of fuel Saturn V would need to reach the moon based on the day month and year, all in his head. Yet he couldn't tie his shoes, it was like his mind didn't find that information worth saving. He had velcro on his shoes rather than laces and was a brilliant person. The description at the beginning of this reminded me of him.
There was a documentary about autism years ago i watched. It showed different people with different levels ofautism for a lack of a better description. One guy was able to remember every single word of every book he ever read and he could tell you if you asked him the page and the number of the word. He was the inspiration of the charcter "rain man" of the movie of the same name. But he wasn't able to put on his cloth by himself. There was also a young boy who was flown over a city in a helicopter that afterwards drew a foto like picture in detail of what he had seen. And there was a guy who seemed completely normal, but was able to learn fluent icelandic in less than a week. At the end the most fitting explanation was: people with that sort of autism seem to be able to use parts of the brain to store data, that we "normalos" use for different purposes. Hence their ability to do things we can't, and vice versa. And then there are people who have a "condition" i don't remember the name, but some of them can "see numbers and calculations" before their eyes like projections. They have an easy time calculating things we not just need pen and paper for but need time and effort.
I've heard stories about people who went to jail cuz they did literally anything to harm a kid usually getting utterly annihilated by the rest of the prisoners. The notion of our species having an aggressive parental instinct ain't wrong, my dude, it's just we're used to it.
Not knowing how to refill a vending machine or work out five plus five isn't a lack of intelligence, it's a lack of education or training... enormous difference.
@@bodricthered Or simply a lack of reason to expend the resources/memory space to bother learning. I think Einstein during an interview was asked either his phone number or address and he picked up a phone book. When asked why he didn't know it, he said why? He could look it up. If you don't fill vending machines, why need to know it? Calculators are everywhere, so long as you're taught how to operate them.
This is true. A woman who gives in to her maternal side is capable of becoming super-human in terms of strength. The most common example is that she'll suddenly become strong enough to lift a car off of her child for the purpose of saving them! Humans have this natural berserker state where we become vastly more capable in combat than our training in any field can press. Even a frail weakling can become an unstoppable torrent of murder and death, showing enemies in the viscera of their kin! Adults will protect their offspring to the death, and will be the greatest nightmare of all things if provoked! Humans are capable of great feats if for the sake of the children. Pedophiles however are the opposite. They are eternally weak and lack a berserker state, they are cowardly and prey on children. Their natural enemy is the parents. Parents can be seen as apex predators, protecting their kin. Despite the fact we are seen as omnivores by our general diets. If you were an alien species and you need someone to care for your younglings because your species is more or less considered frail, a human with parental instincts will be your greatest bet. Though with a lifespan of roughly 100 years we're not the longest-living of species. Remember the difference though in humans. Well developed humans will have some level of parental instincts, and become a nightmare for anyone who threatens the children! In pedophiles however, expect your children to become victims! A parent is the greatest threat to a pedophile, because the parent will not hesitate to murder a pedophile as if the child-raping scum had committed a war crime of the worst kind that could only be punishable by an on the spot field execution! Because parents view pedophiles as traitors to their entire species, the vast majority of humans despise the pedophile.
Those of other species, get your copy of the encyclopedia on humans and their lives. In that set you will learn very little about what really pisses off humans. You will learn about their religions, what they will eat, what and why they wear certain clothing, their political structure, their history, wars, and a plethora of other seemingly interesting information. What you won't find, but must experience, is what happens to the one trying to hurt, or hurting, a child of any species. One you have seen what happens, you will then want to find a councelor so you can deal with the carnage you witnessed against the one who tried to hurt, or hurt, a child of any species. Then, make sure to hire a human to take care of your children!
I have been enjoying these stories for the past few weeks, all have been excellent, but this one absolutely delighted me. Fantastic job! Please keep it up.
I personally do not care if this was written by Human or A.I.,,,,,It is simply,,truly and without doubt THE most accurate depiction of what "a human" actually is..............
Man oh man!!! these stories are so much fun! Someone should make one about a bunch of human killer marines being disciplined by a mom... and being deadly scared of her flipflops... like all of us latino men... LOL
"The human fought alongside me during countless raids. I saw it take down three Galraxian Bladebeasts with a knife it had grabbed from the kitchen. Then one day I heard the matriarch of it's immediate clan call it by it's full name. Then and only then did I learn what human fear looks like"
I love this story. We as a species need to adhere to it across the world. We have extreme levels of compassion, but we also can ignore others very easily. Only those in close proximity are of our concern. Humanity is good at extreme compassion or extreme complacency and apathy.
LOL " I know a human who can't answer simple math questions like 5 + 5 but this same man knows how to fix a fusion reactor with nothing more than a pipe wrench" This alien dose not understand the human art of sarcasm.
as somone who knows human mothers have somtimes lifted entire cars of their wheels to save a child, i can confire this does indeed defire logic, physics and bioloigy
So very true. Very recemtly a person was sent to prison on what they did to a child. Once they got to prison, it wasn't long before another human ended them based on their crime to a child.
I love how the author made a great effort to exaggerate the power of parenthood in the fighting scene. Yet somehow I feel that it's not too exaggerated. Maybe because I didn't see how the attackers look like. But still. I'm with the humans who came to the rescue.
There was that one video from Russia with a woman walking around with a kid and that kid stepped on a unsecured sewer manhole and it felt down. And that small woman then rushed in, grabbed that manhole, threw it away like it was made out of cardboard and jumped right into the hole to get the kid out. And I must remind you that such manholes are mostly made out of gray cast iron and are freaking heavy. I am a big guy and I am not sure if I could just grab one to lift it, especially that most dont even have a handle to grab on and are designed to be moved with a crowbar, not to mention to just yeet it away like it was nothing.
Big guy here. Can confirm, manhole covers are Stupidly heavy. Unwieldy too! Our European ones have NOTHING to grab onto, only in the center is a shallow thumb sized groove _(by lack of better words)_ for a pry bar-like tool. Usually 2 workmen lift them out.
@@FroggyMoshbig guy from America can confirm that if you see an angry human wielding one easily…prey that your not their target cause someone effed around and is about to find out
Don’t fuck with old Russian women, the rural ones carry large logs on one shoulder as a regular necessity during the winter. Never fuck with Scottish women, you don’t know which ones participate in throwing what looks like a ship mast into the air.
This is the 2nd time I have seen this story covered by Humans are Space Orcs channel. I have to say this voice has made interesting differences from the other channel enjoyable in own unique way.
Thanks for the laughs! As usual, I added this to my finished audiobook file, for listening to again in the future. I also added it to my humor file, so I can listen when I am just in the mood for funny stories. I'd like to point out that though it's very funny, there is also a lot of truth to this. I never had kids because I never wanted my own, but I don't hate kids. A few times I have managed to quiet crying babies while out shopping by saying hi and other friendly things to them in a friendly voice. Having a stranger do that to them confuses them, so they stop crying while they try to figure it out.😄 On one occasion, I was grocery shopping and a very young boy hopped on in front of me on the electric shopping cart I was using. I took him for a short ride and then returned him to his mother. All 3 of us were happy that day. That happened almost 20 years ago, but it still amuses me, and still makes me happy. In spite of my choosing a childless life, and also, in spite of my health issues and disabilities, I would do whatever I could to protect endangered children from harm.
having evolved the way we did, we're held back by our own safety mechanisms. our bodies are capable of much more than they are capable of withstanding; and so we normally cant access that capability lest we damage ourselves (and what evolutionary line would let someone without highly tuned regenerative characteristics knowlingly harm themselves?). however, we also have chemicals in our bodies that allow us to turn off those safety mechanisms in times of danger. Being highly social, we have the ability to percieve danger to others in the same way we would danger to ourselves. if you cant feel pain, you cant tell you're going too hard, so you dont stop going. avoiding or removing the danger is worth whatever injury you get from the over exertion
😂😂😂 Had me crying/laughing the whole time. A person might get away with many things, but harming an innocent child is NOT one of those things. The ones that got away were lucky. 😂😂😂
That was a very good story. I really enjoyed it. Right on the target too. We are very protective of our young, that is we who are of sound mind. You get a drunker and they’re not so predictive of their kid. They beat the crap out of most of the time.
7:39: PFFFFFFFFT!!!!!!!!! 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣 Yep, that about sums it up. Never, I repeat NEVER, get between a Human and its offspring, it WILL end badly, FOR YOU!
It takes 25 years to fully develop a human into an adult. All parents who aren't mentally depraved will have an instinct to protect such a precious investment of time and effort. Those parents that fail to provide proper support during the child's growth will not receive the support they will inevitably need in their elderly years. So yes, for the most part, our species is indeed wired to become emotionally invested in the welfare of all children within our environment.
I was told by our doctor that my wife and I couldn't have children. 17 years later, after some health changes, my wife gave birth to my son. The pain and suffering I would, without question, inflict on anyone who would harm him, I'm sure would land me in multiple life sentences if it ever came down to it.
Listeing to this for the first time and this is 100% what my grandmother would do if she had the strength. She's far, far from her prime now at 94, but still filled with pride and venom, she would absolutely kill a man in whatever way she could, poison or peeling knife to the throat, if he threatened her children or grandchildren.
It would have been a great ending if they questioned her why she did it and she just said "they attacked the children what MONSTER does that" - still holding a torn out limb and a fistful of guts in her hands in an obliterated room bathed in the pirates blood.
Reminds me of 300 when Leonidas says "Clearly you don't know our women! I might as well have marched them up here, judging by what I've seen." You don't fk with a mother protecting her kids.
It is safer to attack a pride of lions barehanded than to fight an enraged mother even if you're in a suit of armor. First, they get stronger than Superman from carrying their babies around. Second, they go into an insane rage if they think you're going to do something to their babies. When the adrenaline starts flowing, they will pick up a truck and throw it at you.
a pipe wrench and a monkey wrench are two different things on a pipe wrenches jaws there are teeth, used to grab the round pipe and hold on on a monkey wrenches jaws there are no teeth, used to grab shaped nuts on pipe fittings
He forgot to research that SHE is 10x more dangerous because when motherly instincts kicks in, there is no words/methods that can be used to reason with them.
Yeah, when I was in the sixth grade, a classmate was with her grandmother visiting a cemetery, and the girl somehow pulled a large, granite tombstone over onto herself. Another graveyard visitor heard the commotion and began running towards them, intending to help. He reported that this little 78yo woman grabbed said grave marker and flipped it 180° to free the child. He said that the physical display appeared to be so effortless that it reminded him of someone flipping a pillow.
This picture makes me think that the command line for the AI to make the artwork with was "Bikers in space looking at the guy who just tipped over their space bikes"
I'd like to think if we ever meet aliens they'll look at us the way we see chimpanzees. Terrifyingly strong psychotic apes that can rip your face off and use your own arm to beat you to death; but kinda cute when they're happy.
Reminds me of one i heard a bit back about a paradise world with 3(i think) human teenagers acting as like camp councilors for some younglings. The planet was atracked and the humans wrecked chaos on the invaders to defend those in their care.
For anyone doubting this, remember that the Doom Slayer started his rampage over a bunny.
And John Wick was inspired in part by a true event. No joke.
And his whole familly
@@Ater95it’s cannon that he cared more about daisy being killed
Keep in mind the only the whole reason the Doom guy was on that was on Mars in the first place was because he punched his commanding officer in the face after said commanding officer told doom guy to fire on civilians Then when dude I got back to Earth he found his hometown destroyed his wife did and his bunny's head on a stick and he went ballistic
Never fcuk with children or innocents that's a big no no. Hell comes for you if you do.
"I will repeat this so there is no room for ambiguity." Loved that part.
There are two human staff you never want to meet in anger, the first is the Butler, but by far the more dangerous is the Nanny, they have been utterly destroying nightmare creatures that threaten their charges sanity for centuries (there is a reason those creatures hide under beds and in wardrobes), if you threaten their charges you will discover that even an elderly nanny, with nothing more than a walking stick, is more deadly than a platoon of well trained heavily armed special forces
Also: their lawyers.
Hmm... Don't think I disagree. ;)
threaten the nanny's charges or the mothers cubs and watch why humans trained warriors respects any parental figure among their kin as even if on the brink of death they rip the fussion core out of your own ship to force it down your throat before letting out a howl that shatter asteroids... and then then.. the choir of roars will tell you how not just you will die.. but everyone and everything that hade anything to do with your attack on the young..
Team Kerri. 🤘
Disc... Place?
You don’t fuck with kids. They are innocent, you hurt a child, even a nonhuman child, and your existence is never again going to be free of pain.
There was one story where aliens came to take a colony, and by sheer coincidence, a rival colony on the planet sent a force to take the same colony. As soon as the aliens tried to target a kid to quell the inhabitants the rival force helped the colony out.
Reminded me of something way, way back in 1987. An 18-month old girl fell down a well in Texas. The well was an 8in diameter pipe - she was 20+ft below ground. Rescuers & equipment poured in and the nation's attention was focused on saving a single little girl. This story ain't wrong.
She was named Jessica Morales - or Baby Jessica. I think there was a movie.
Yep. I remember the incident clearly. Too bad the name of the man who rescued her isn't also remembered. What he had to do to get to her was nothing short of heroic.
@@donaldwert7137 Robert O'Donnell. He was a paramedic. He took his own life in 1995 after developing PTSD. RIP.
*McClure. Morales is her married name (yup, she's 37 years old now - got married in 2006).
@@OptimusWombat Thank you. RIP, indeed. We lose way too many people to that.
I remember as a kid, watching a news broadcast about a woman in a VW bug who was involved in an accident. When she came to on the side of the road, she began asking about her baby. People informed her that her baby was trapped under the car, and that police and firetrucks were on their way. She tried to get to her baby, but several of the men said no no no don’t! And tried to keep her away, she shoved them, three or four full grown men, out of the way, rushed to the car, lifted and rolled it to the side to get to her baby, who was just fine!
"regardless of species"
Yeah my first instinct when seeing even a little delivery robot get attacked was "HELP HIM" this is probably true. Wonder if caring for the young of any species or anything we ascribe those emotions to is because of our dependence on animals we've domesticated. Possibly not a common thing in the galaxy
A combination of self preservation, empathy, attachment due to pack bonding, and our uncanny obsession with cute things, leads to us viewing anything weaker, smaller, or just pretty to look at, as something that must be defended. Just like how people will tie themselves to trees in the name of protection, we also will throw hands with God himself if a baby of any species is threatened with harm or death in our presence.
@@slademmxii8759 This is giving me flashbacks to that one time I fell down the youtube rabbit hole of baby animal rescue videos... some done by professionals, but mostly just, gosling gets stuck in a fence, helping ducks over the curb, kittens jumping out of the grass or doing cpr on one frozen in the snow... there's definitely something there. Funny that the examples I can remember are all waterfowl and cats though.
@@slademmxii8759the cute things not so much. Haven’t some soldiers broken down when their robot drone that’s used to check for explosives gets blown up? We as a species have a tendency to get upset when stuff we depend on gets fucked up
Humans babies are by far one of the most helpless infants on earth. Most animals can walk shortly after infancy. A human baby only has one survival instinct from the start and that is “make a noise summon help” because of this we are typically sympathetic to things that are cute and small
If you think about us compared to other species on our planet, our care for the young is remarkable. It takes years for our young to even be capable, so that empathy to protect is a lot stronger than any other species
A bit of real
Human strength is normally limited by brains rather than muscle. And we all know fear is situational, and it's effects are unpredictable
true. when adrenaline shuts down the limiters, humans get insanely strong - but risk muscle damage
@Genesis23OPB even at low levels it takes awareness to drive a body successfully!
@@Genesis23OPBthere's a story where a father with his two bare hand lift and flip over a car to saves his daughter. They're both hospitalized, the father dislocated his shoulder bone and tears his muscle in all 4 limbs.
But the daughter survives
@@スガルwhat a mad lad
40 years ago, my friend and I were camping in The Lake District, in England. We decided to take 'a shortcut' back to our campsite through an empty field. We did not see the bull. It charged. We both legged it towards a hedge and leapt over, into the adjoining field.
That hedge was at least six feet high and four feet wide and we hardly grazed the top of it. We couldn't have done it again for a million pounds.
Developing on a planet with cave lions, dire wolves, crocodiles and other incredible perdators and becoming the apex predator above even the most powerful and fierce of them probably has something to do with that.
I watched a vid of a Mama Elephant Stomping a Crocodile to Death. You could hardly tell what it was when she was done. Harming the young of any species on Earth risks a gruesome and quick death. Some species will eat you afterwards. But not humans or elephants.
Oh, we will certainly eat them after....
As a baby my families golden retriever Annie, damn near killed a friends dog who came over to sniff me.
Annie was a big rug most days. A huge lovable rug that never even growled at anyone.
But I was her baby and that dog got too close
yeah, it's a fun little thing, most mammals are instinctually able to recognize the young of even other species and know to be wary even though a defenseless baby would otherwise make for an easy meal since it often means that an aggressive mother is nearby.
Well, any creatures hailed from Earth has this quality on some degree - maybe the insectoid ones less, as they has enough kids, and they will be mostly drones, but any bird or mammal species, and even most of the reptiles do care of their youngs. And on Earth, there is no species, who has absolutely no predators, even if for some the said predator is also a prey species. Which also explains, why we doesn't back down so easily, when we are threatened...
If he had included how incarcerated criminals that had been harmed as juveniles sometimes kill their fellow criminals if they become aware of their past actions, and though not encouraged by their justice system, they do act as if it were foreseeable outcome, that would have also demonstrated the depth of the instinct.
This is why I like HFY. This story (and reading) had me cheering and even crying. HFY!
Even just that someone came up with and wrote this, and shared it, makes me so happy to be human!
its sometimes hard to vibe with when it goea overboard
@@kingmasterlord This wasn't overboard at all. I have witnessed an 80lb waif woman lift the back half of an F-250 up so her child that was stuck under it could get out. By the time those of us nearby recognized what was going on and running over she dropped it down and collapsed. She cracked more than a few vertebrae and tore several of her muscles. I heard it took her almost a year to recover.
Do not test a humans ability to ignore the body's self imposed restrictions to accomplish the impossible. It isn't just adrenaline, though that is a component of it. Our body has dopamine, adrenaline, and endorphins that allow us to reach the peak of our restrictions. What lets you push past even that? When you are rushing to help another. Every time we see someone pushing past what should even be physically possible for them, it is ALWAYS when they are focused for another. Those able to access this for self survival are very rare, and this usually only happens when extreme anger is present.
Humans are incredibly insane when it comes to what they can accomplish when they are protecting something. With guns being a thing this doesn't seem to help so much, but once you get into a melee? Oh it most certainly does.
I came in wondering if anyone else teared up cheering for kerry 😂😂
What is HFY?
@@willy4170 humans fuck yeah
Armed her with slippers, "The altimate Asian Mom"
"I will send you to Jesus!"
And then there's Latina moms. No force in existence is going to save you from that chancla.
I think it's just a mother thing, I'm a spaniard and even here they seem to have aimbot
Death by Chancla…. That would be a humiliating way to go for the aliens.
@@vincent_v1094 Zuleima Josefina Alejandra de la Concepción Gonzalez Brito Wins! Chancletality!
The most dangerous creature in the universe is momma-bear protecting the children in her charge.
Yup.
As a mom and a professional caregiver, this is my favorite story. 😂
hell yeah. i loved the part where the other humans said it was "too lenient"
You bully the smols, you get the mauls.
The moral of the story: don't commit sudoku by attempting to harm kids around a human.
I assume you mean seppuku not sudoku.
@@alanclague2333 come back to me when you develop a humor sense.
@@Kohagaan Unfortunately, on the internet, nobody can tell if you're sincere or not.
@@KaiHenningsen i did , when i heard that joke the first time. Beside that, is it a known meme.
@@alanclague2333we know😂
Hallarious - the most dangerous element in the universe - parenthood! He aint wrong!
Humans use, at maximum, 80% of their bodies strength until the brain decides otherwise and then we are capable of tremendous acts of physical activity but at a cost to our bodies. Our muscles can shatter our bones and teeth when this happens. Hysterical strength.
Powered by the murder juice we produce naturally. Our doctors call it adrenaline. The Xenos call it the Death Driver.
I know a person who could calculate the amount of fuel Saturn V would need to reach the moon based on the day month and year, all in his head. Yet he couldn't tie his shoes, it was like his mind didn't find that information worth saving. He had velcro on his shoes rather than laces and was a brilliant person. The description at the beginning of this reminded me of him.
There was a documentary about autism years ago i watched. It showed different people with different levels ofautism for a lack of a better description. One guy was able to remember every single word of every book he ever read and he could tell you if you asked him the page and the number of the word. He was the inspiration of the charcter "rain man" of the movie of the same name. But he wasn't able to put on his cloth by himself.
There was also a young boy who was flown over a city in a helicopter that afterwards drew a foto like picture in detail of what he had seen.
And there was a guy who seemed completely normal, but was able to learn fluent icelandic in less than a week.
At the end the most fitting explanation was: people with that sort of autism seem to be able to use parts of the brain to store data, that we "normalos" use for different purposes. Hence their ability to do things we can't, and vice versa.
And then there are people who have a "condition" i don't remember the name, but some of them can "see numbers and calculations" before their eyes like projections. They have an easy time calculating things we not just need pen and paper for but need time and effort.
If only this were true for all of them the world would be a better place.
More or less. There's reason why seeing anyone truly harm a child would be considered soulless and psychotic.
I've heard stories about people who went to jail cuz they did literally anything to harm a kid usually getting utterly annihilated by the rest of the prisoners. The notion of our species having an aggressive parental instinct ain't wrong, my dude, it's just we're used to it.
As a ancient earth saying goes.
"Don't mess with mama bear."
This felt like a missed opportunity to use the phrase "don't mess with a momma bear."
Not knowing how to refill a vending machine or work out five plus five isn't a lack of intelligence, it's a lack of education or training... enormous difference.
Can be. Can also be a lack of mental ability...
Or they're autistic
@@bodricthered Or simply a lack of reason to expend the resources/memory space to bother learning. I think Einstein during an interview was asked either his phone number or address and he picked up a phone book. When asked why he didn't know it, he said why? He could look it up. If you don't fill vending machines, why need to know it? Calculators are everywhere, so long as you're taught how to operate them.
To me, it seems like a 10-year-old came up with this story.
@@nagazaki2596 Gotta start somewhere. I enjoyed it.
This is true. A woman who gives in to her maternal side is capable of becoming super-human in terms of strength. The most common example is that she'll suddenly become strong enough to lift a car off of her child for the purpose of saving them!
Humans have this natural berserker state where we become vastly more capable in combat than our training in any field can press. Even a frail weakling can become an unstoppable torrent of murder and death, showing enemies in the viscera of their kin!
Adults will protect their offspring to the death, and will be the greatest nightmare of all things if provoked! Humans are capable of great feats if for the sake of the children.
Pedophiles however are the opposite. They are eternally weak and lack a berserker state, they are cowardly and prey on children. Their natural enemy is the parents. Parents can be seen as apex predators, protecting their kin. Despite the fact we are seen as omnivores by our general diets.
If you were an alien species and you need someone to care for your younglings because your species is more or less considered frail, a human with parental instincts will be your greatest bet. Though with a lifespan of roughly 100 years we're not the longest-living of species.
Remember the difference though in humans. Well developed humans will have some level of parental instincts, and become a nightmare for anyone who threatens the children! In pedophiles however, expect your children to become victims! A parent is the greatest threat to a pedophile, because the parent will not hesitate to murder a pedophile as if the child-raping scum had committed a war crime of the worst kind that could only be punishable by an on the spot field execution! Because parents view pedophiles as traitors to their entire species, the vast majority of humans despise the pedophile.
Those of other species, get your copy of the encyclopedia on humans and their lives. In that set you will learn very little about what really pisses off humans. You will learn about their religions, what they will eat, what and why they wear certain clothing, their political structure, their history, wars, and a plethora of other seemingly interesting information. What you won't find, but must experience, is what happens to the one trying to hurt, or hurting, a child of any species. One you have seen what happens, you will then want to find a councelor so you can deal with the carnage you witnessed against the one who tried to hurt, or hurt, a child of any species.
Then, make sure to hire a human to take care of your children!
"Poor bastard" and "pirate" cannot describe the same person.
Usually, they aren't.
For that sucker's last milliseconds however?
That's the simplest way the author could write its FAFO moment.
You're not gonna believe this
I'm dying. That Janitor takes golden mop of the year, and "best babysitter" award. Holy shit.
I have been enjoying these stories for the past few weeks, all have been excellent, but this one absolutely delighted me. Fantastic job! Please keep it up.
I personally do not care if this was written by Human or A.I.,,,,,It is simply,,truly and without doubt THE most accurate depiction of what "a human" actually is..............
Well, I don't want to break your bubble but it's only true in regard of, let's say, western society.
@@tjblues01 West is the best.
Man oh man!!! these stories are so much fun! Someone should make one about a bunch of human killer marines being disciplined by a mom... and being deadly scared of her flipflops... like all of us latino men... LOL
Doesn't matter how tough or old you get, your mom can cut you down to size. Sometimes all it takes is a look. THAT look.
There is scene in Dragonball Z where some alien takes over body of Gohan (I think?) and then gets disciplined by Chi Chi. :)
"The human fought alongside me during countless raids. I saw it take down three Galraxian Bladebeasts with a knife it had grabbed from the kitchen. Then one day I heard the matriarch of it's immediate clan call it by it's full name. Then and only then did I learn what human fear looks like"
@@worldcomicsreview354 Very well written!
😂😂😂😂😂 💯💯💯💯💯👍
this one was fn to write. it came out of nowhere it was just a 'hmm... this things fun. write it' kinda thing
mission accomplished 😊
I enjoyed it 👍👍
Good story, thanks.
I love this story. We as a species need to adhere to it across the world. We have extreme levels of compassion, but we also can ignore others very easily. Only those in close proximity are of our concern. Humanity is good at extreme compassion or extreme complacency and apathy.
LOL " I know a human who can't answer simple math questions like 5 + 5 but this same man knows how to fix a fusion reactor with nothing more than a pipe wrench" This alien dose not understand the human art of sarcasm.
He is also unfamiliar with the concept of a redneck/good old country boy.😉
Oh God. I am dying laughing. This is so good. The images forming in my head of the Nanny tearing a boarding party to pieces. 🤣
Now all I can picture is a nanny named fran
This tale tells it all - humans will not tolerate the harming of children. It expands to all none combatants. Excellent story teller.
as somone who knows human mothers have somtimes lifted entire cars of their wheels to save a child, i can confire this does indeed defire logic, physics and bioloigy
My algorithm did good work with this channel
love the parenthood theme in those stories, very refreshing :-)
Someone should send this to the Uvalde PD.
So very true. Very recemtly a person was sent to prison on what they did to a child. Once they got to prison, it wasn't long before another human ended them based on their crime to a child.
Well thats a given.
i think this is the 4th one of these stories i listen to but really how are these so good.
I love how the author made a great effort to exaggerate the power of parenthood in the fighting scene.
Yet somehow I feel that it's not too exaggerated.
Maybe because I didn't see how the attackers look like. But still. I'm with the humans who came to the rescue.
Having actually seen both of my parents go Mama/Papa Bear mode on somebody, I can agree with this. It was simultaneously awesome and terrifying.
And at the same time we get "mothers" leaving their child alone for 10 days in a play pen unfortunately not all parents are like Kerri
Adrenalin and human brain safety's removed. Suddenly, you are dealing with a being who has become +10x stronger than before.
There was that one video from Russia with a woman walking around with a kid and that kid stepped on a unsecured sewer manhole and it felt down. And that small woman then rushed in, grabbed that manhole, threw it away like it was made out of cardboard and jumped right into the hole to get the kid out.
And I must remind you that such manholes are mostly made out of gray cast iron and are freaking heavy. I am a big guy and I am not sure if I could just grab one to lift it, especially that most dont even have a handle to grab on and are designed to be moved with a crowbar, not to mention to just yeet it away like it was nothing.
Big guy here. Can confirm, manhole covers are Stupidly heavy. Unwieldy too!
Our European ones have NOTHING to grab onto, only in the center is a shallow thumb sized groove _(by lack of better words)_ for a pry bar-like tool.
Usually 2 workmen lift them out.
@@FroggyMoshbig guy from America can confirm that if you see an angry human wielding one easily…prey that your not their target cause someone effed around and is about to find out
Don’t fuck with old Russian women, the rural ones carry large logs on one shoulder as a regular necessity during the winter. Never fuck with Scottish women, you don’t know which ones participate in throwing what looks like a ship mast into the air.
This is the 2nd time I have seen this story covered by Humans are Space Orcs channel. I have to say this voice has made interesting differences from the other channel enjoyable in own unique way.
Anything requiring less than 1 ton of force and a human can tear it apart, and the human can walk away with minimal injuries
That part about shoving the grenade down the throat gave me chills
Thanks for the laughs! As usual, I added this to my finished audiobook file, for listening to again in the future. I also added it to my humor file, so I can listen when I am just in the mood for funny stories.
I'd like to point out that though it's very funny, there is also a lot of truth to this. I never had kids because I never wanted my own, but I don't hate kids. A few times I have managed to quiet crying babies while out shopping by saying hi and other friendly things to them in a friendly voice. Having a stranger do that to them confuses them, so they stop crying while they try to figure it out.😄 On one occasion, I was grocery shopping and a very young boy hopped on in front of me on the electric shopping cart I was using. I took him for a short ride and then returned him to his mother. All 3 of us were happy that day. That happened almost 20 years ago, but it still amuses me, and still makes me happy.
In spite of my choosing a childless life, and also, in spite of my health issues and disabilities, I would do whatever I could to protect endangered children from harm.
Great Syfy writing. I love this short story. Thank you for sharing.
having evolved the way we did, we're held back by our own safety mechanisms. our bodies are capable of much more than they are capable of withstanding; and so we normally cant access that capability lest we damage ourselves (and what evolutionary line would let someone without highly tuned regenerative characteristics knowlingly harm themselves?). however, we also have chemicals in our bodies that allow us to turn off those safety mechanisms in times of danger. Being highly social, we have the ability to percieve danger to others in the same way we would danger to ourselves. if you cant feel pain, you cant tell you're going too hard, so you dont stop going. avoiding or removing the danger is worth whatever injury you get from the over exertion
3:34 Oh, no, friend.....you have an incredibly dangerous and nigh-unstoppable enemy *_AS_*_ your incredibly powerful ally._ ✊🏻
😂😂😂 Had me crying/laughing the whole time. A person might get away with many things, but harming an innocent child is NOT one of those things. The ones that got away were lucky. 😂😂😂
That was a very good story. I really enjoyed it. Right on the target too. We are very protective of our young, that is we who are of sound mind. You get a drunker and they’re not so predictive of their kid. They beat the crap out of most of the time.
7:39: PFFFFFFFFT!!!!!!!!! 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣
Yep, that about sums it up.
Never, I repeat NEVER, get between a Human and its offspring, it WILL end badly, FOR YOU!
This is my favorite of all your stories. It makes me laugh with joy and gives me more respect for parents.
glad to see it's now humans in general that's seen as both loved and hated and not just Americans XD
It's stories like this that make it so easy to subscribe.
It takes 25 years to fully develop a human into an adult. All parents who aren't mentally depraved will have an instinct to protect such a precious investment of time and effort. Those parents that fail to provide proper support during the child's growth will not receive the support they will inevitably need in their elderly years. So yes, for the most part, our species is indeed wired to become emotionally invested in the welfare of all children within our environment.
I was told by our doctor that my wife and I couldn't have children. 17 years later, after some health changes, my wife gave birth to my son.
The pain and suffering I would, without question, inflict on anyone who would harm him, I'm sure would land me in multiple life sentences if it ever came down to it.
Listeing to this for the first time and this is 100% what my grandmother would do if she had the strength. She's far, far from her prime now at 94, but still filled with pride and venom, she would absolutely kill a man in whatever way she could, poison or peeling knife to the throat, if he threatened her children or grandchildren.
It would have been a great ending if they questioned her why she did it and she just said "they attacked the children what MONSTER does that" - still holding a torn out limb and a fistful of guts in her hands in an obliterated room bathed in the pirates blood.
This is why John Wick murdered a massive portion of the Russian mob, over his puppy (yes I know it’s a movie but it’s a good parallel to this)
Reminds me of 300 when Leonidas says "Clearly you don't know our women! I might as well have marched them up here, judging by what I've seen." You don't fk with a mother protecting her kids.
ROFLMAO with a tear in my eye, this was a great written piece and wonderful narration.
Never...Mess...With...MAMA...BEAR. LOL, I'm so glad I stumbled across this channel.
Hell hath no fury like a care-giver’s scorn. 😂😅
I love this story so much, I’ve listened to it more than twice!
It is safer to attack a pride of lions barehanded than to fight an enraged mother even if you're in a suit of armor. First, they get stronger than Superman from carrying their babies around. Second, they go into an insane rage if they think you're going to do something to their babies. When the adrenaline starts flowing, they will pick up a truck and throw it at you.
Kudos to the writer for not using the term monkey wrench.
a pipe wrench and a monkey wrench are two different things
on a pipe wrenches jaws there are teeth, used to grab the round pipe and hold on
on a monkey wrenches jaws there are no teeth, used to grab shaped nuts on pipe fittings
@@111smdMonkey wrenches also come in Extra Large. In the appropriate circumstances they make excellent hammers.
Nobody really cares about the term "monkey wrench."
This made me laugh so hard that I cried!!!
He forgot to research that SHE is 10x more dangerous because when motherly instincts kicks in, there is no words/methods that can be used to reason with them.
wait till aliens see a mothers adrenalin surge cause her to lift a car to get a kid free lol
Yeah, when I was in the sixth grade, a classmate was with her grandmother visiting a cemetery, and the girl somehow pulled a large, granite tombstone over onto herself. Another graveyard visitor heard the commotion and began running towards them, intending to help. He reported that this little 78yo woman grabbed said grave marker and flipped it 180° to free the child. He said that the physical display appeared to be so effortless that it reminded him of someone flipping a pillow.
Mercy for even thinking of atack on any young ones,or uncapable of combat is unthincable,by me!
Actually pretty accurate for most. Great story.
hell hath no fury like mother scorned
Oh God I just discovered these videos. I'm gonna be here for a long, long while, aren't I?
Yes, yes you are.
A rabbit hole? HAH! Try a black hole!
I genuinely had tears in my eyes listening to this. Well done!
This picture makes me think that the command line for the AI to make the artwork with was "Bikers in space looking at the guy who just tipped over their space bikes"
Humorous in a dark way. Plenty of chuckles. Thoroughly enjoyed it
The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world
I'd like to think if we ever meet aliens they'll look at us the way we see chimpanzees. Terrifyingly strong psychotic apes that can rip your face off and use your own arm to beat you to death; but kinda cute when they're happy.
Mothers,no matter the species,are one the most deadly entities the universe can create.
Don't mess with momma bear.
"Cannot stock a vending machine" I felt that. Vending machines are complex machinery.
I'm a Dad. Easier for me to perish than kids get harmed.
We evolved to look after our future.
Good on Kerri 😈
I always knew why I made sure to not piss off the cleaning lady, whether school or my workplace. You don't mess wit the janitors.
Don't mess with the Mama Bear!
DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT MESS WITH MAMA BEARS CUBS!😆🤣
Thank-you for this!! I had to repeat a few parts - I was laughing too hard.
I can definitely say this is a reasonable reaction to threatening the lives of children.
Someone could make a sick ass comic from this. An animation even.
LOL! "The One Thing Humans Excel At" is SELF DELUSION and that is a plain, simple fact.
We excel at more than just that. Right
.
.
.
Right??
The "momma bear strength" and "father awareness" thing might be memes but that doesn't mean they aren't real.
So in other words, The Only Thing They Feared....Was Her.
*Doom music begins.*
Don’t mess with a mama bear and her cub
Reminds me of one i heard a bit back about a paradise world with 3(i think) human teenagers acting as like camp councilors for some younglings. The planet was atracked and the humans wrecked chaos on the invaders to defend those in their care.
Damn they need to make a movie out of this, got to say it's awesome
Very good story indeed.
7:57
The thumbnail aint soldiers.
They’re the daycare staff