Uh hundred percent lol. Watching him on Rogan is the best cuz Joe will shut his shit down, and Bart pouts like a toddler if he isn’t the center of attention.
The problem with Bert's "sobriety" is that he's not actually staying sober. He'll say he hasn't drank anything in 23 days, but then say things like, "Well I did have a glass of wine with my wife in the hot tub. But I don't count those." or "I haven't drank all week! Actually I had a couple beers yesterday, but they were nothing."
I think we should make it illegal to share videos, with anyone. That way no one can shove their phone in your face, and if you see something funny, you better make damn sure your friend will appreciate the recommendation and not snitch.
Or maybe..... the other comedians hung around with him to make themselves look funnier? Same tactic as groups of girls always having the one 2 to make the 6 and 7s look better by comparison
@@brianmurphy250bro thats free money. He could retire just from his VA work which is 1 in a million rare for a VA to do. He probably just thought it was funny or owed someone a favor.
Yeah but at the same time the guy claims to be ‘the machine’ and makes a bunch of money off of calling himself that… and he can’t handle a little trip?
I thought that was just part of the joke? Like he was just poking fun at himself like some heavier guys do. But if he was doing / saying those things un-ironically, then holy shit
In early 2020 I was on a terrible path. On day 4 of a drug/ alcohol fueled bender I woke up in a strange apartment on an air mattress to a shirtless Bert on max volume and a room full of idiots laughing. I was so absolutely disgusted in that moment that I decided enough was enough. I went back to college, got a career, got my life together. I now own a home and have a nice life. Thank you Bert.
And then wake them up again in 10 minutes to remind them to remind him to set his alarm in 15 minutes so he can get up and wake them up again, to prepare him breakfast.
@@take7upyours822 😭😭 this comment had me cracking up. Don’t forget the middle of the night announcement that he peed and remembered to flush the toilet
@@TtloreTom is a bit of a psychopath and enables Bert quite a bit. Best example is their podcast with Dr. Huberman where Tom tells Huberman about all the terrible habits Bert does to get a shock reaction out of him. Now just repeat this same interaction to every guest that Tom and Bert get and you’ll get the picture. Tom loves using Bert as his personal circus freak show.
@@franciscoanguiano9838 To be fair that's the whole shtick. Bert's only comedic value is self deprication so that's ultimately the entire podcast. With that being said you're right though, they actually drag each other down.
Burt behaved as if he’s been one of Sandler’s boys being disrespectful, but Sandler’s boys would never ask him such questions they know what’s off limits Sandler has been consistent in decades of interviews always gets triggered at a “what’s your favorite movie you’ve filmed” question I’ve seen him have this reaction only to that question honestly
Multi millionaire right now. If he is still that rich in 5-10 years, I will be impressed. I say this in mind that MC Hammer/ Mike Tyson used to be multi millionaires
@@Stringbean1138 can confirm, i've met him in person and he really is so damn nice, and it doesn't come off as fake or just tolerance. he means it and enjoys being nice.
@@darknevermore3 Yeah he was serious, I doubt hate is in Adam Sandlers ability the guy seems so damn nice but at the time I believe he meant he was experiencing one of the worst interviews he's ever been a part of
That’s not even the saying lmfao. Either way it’s not a negative notion anyway. Anyone with any business sense knows that who you know is the biggest key to a successful business.
I've watched 2 Bears 1 Cave since the 1st episode, but reached a point that seeing Bert romanticizing everything around his alcoholism to deny he has an addiction problem just got sad, no matter how hard Tom and the booth boys were laughing about it.
I only watch the episodes where he's on break. He's fucking ear cancer personified. And so narcissistic he'll probably watch this video in bed 20 or 30x and obsessively go through the comments wondering why nobody can appreciate his greatness properly.
Bert's podcast is pretty much the same as every narcissist LA comedian. It's about "be a guest on my show and listen to me talk about myself for two hours".
@@ellespera lot of people would just chat about whatever for money if they could, and it gets money and listens. that's the reason it's done. there are a million weird stupid things being done for money that others actually want or pay for or waste time consuming. not sure why we are singling this guy out like he's more insufferable than what gets a ton of attention
A sober month is not the way to treat alcoholism. It's easy to not drink when you have set a future date that you wait and skip the whole month with nothing in mind but make through the "tough time" and reward yourself with a drink. The real challenge is not to drink ever again, face the void and manage through. Anyone out there in denial, just be honest to yourself and best of luck.
@Caramelldansen9999 true but if it's progressed into an addiction, even drinking in moderation can be a slippery slope just due to the nature of alcohol. For some people, agreeing to a single drink can easily end with them being blackout drunk and still trying to have more :c
What’s wild about that clip is that it’s textbook alcoholism. My dad did the same thing, he hovered up Gatorade and other sugary drinks during the morning hangovers to stave off the pain. Alcoholics always dive into something to help offset the side effects of alcohol so they don’t have to stop drinking.
I'd be confident too if I had my mom and dad funding everything for me so I could do whatever I wanted. Some of us need to be less risky, cuz we do not have anything to fall back on.
Burp, bark, fart or Bart Chrysler whatever his name is would be nothing like his cousin Tim Sakura they were never meant to be top dogs they were supposed to be small time comedy club guys that were on stage before the actual funny guys showed up. < Rogan blessed the wrong people.
It's crazy how he is actually a funny person but people find cringey things and just focus on that I do not care enough about his actual life or how he became famous, I just watch his specials and laugh because that's what he's tryna do
I met Bert at an airport lobby, he was very kind and called me “brother” our whole interaction. Over an hour or so, he drank 3 wine glasses and I distinctly remember him filling two water bottles full of alcohol before leaving. He also had airport staff escort him from the lounge dispute no major disruptions or crowds forming. Wish him and his family the best
He just kinda sounds like an okay and nice guy from a personal level, and is probably kinda funny, but is sort of like an alcoholic uncle who has a lot of issues
22:40 It's worth noting that "The Machine" story had multiple waves of popularity, and this was only the latest one. I remember way back when I was in high school, circa 2009, there was another clip of him telling the story that was going viral. It's just hard for anyone who wasn't around back then to find out about it since all the social media from back then is dead (i.e. Myspace).
Hey Tom, love your deep dives a lot it’s just good RUclips. Would love if you did a deep dive on the late great Norm Macdonald. There is a lot to dig up about his career that I never hear anyone talk about. Like his first bout of cancer in the late 80’s. Keep doing the crazy livestreams too, watching you on the Destiney stream take the W over the annoying irk was hilarious!
Is that the Bully music? Incredible. Good video. Almost stopped because I was like “I don’t like Bert why am I gonna watch this” and watched nearly the whole thing.
As someone who struggled heavily with alcohol for 13 years and is now sober, I've become acutely aware of the destructive patterns, the subtle lies, the lapses in judgment, and the tendency to constantly interrupt others that accompany alcoholism. When you're in the throes of addiction, everything revolves around it, and nothing else seems to matter. Did you say hurtful things? No problem, just blame it on the alcohol. Did you mistreat your friends? No big deal, I was blacked out, sorry! I used to be a huge fan of Bert's, but having emerged from that dark period of addiction, all I can do now is empathize with those still struggling. It's evident that Bert recognizes that he feels great when sober, as he has discussed it on numerous occasions in podcasts and elsewhere, but he always seems to immediately contradict them with excuses only two seconds later. It seems he may have exhausted all available options, and even his close friends are growing weary. Sometimes, cutting ties is the only way to help someone. I genuinely hope he can find the strength to achieve sobriety.
Same it took many tires to get and stay sober but I’m always and I I think everyone is a better person when sober. Making friends and connections and calling people helps me a bunch with AA aside from the meetings themselves. Meetings are good but if I don’t reach out to others and make connections AA wouldn’t work for me.
Thankfully I never had a problem with alcohol but I know people who died because they couldnt get off of the stuff. Its incredibly tragic to lose a 20-something to addiction. Glad you got clean brother 💪
@@illijillijilli Try NA if AA isn't working for you. Ive found that finding a meeting or meetings that you relate to the people is a big thing. A lot of the time some meetings have weird vibes that push new people away. Most importantly though, just push through the steps and be honest with you sponsor and the meeting about how hard it is for you. Chances are people will relate and help you in some way. whether its just commiserating or giving some insights into how it feels afterwards. Doing the steps (some of them daily) will def free you my friend. In my experience, the program is about replacing good feelings (drinking) with better feelings (being a part of humanity and living in the world as yourself). Its very rewarding in the end. I wish you the best.
I'm 38, and I began drinking around the age of 18. Initially, it was for enjoyment at parties or to feel at ease in new social settings. However, when I turned 21, things took a turn for the worse. By the time I reached 26, I had become a full-blown alcoholic. Over the next 4-5 years, I made multiple attempts to quit, but each time I only managed to go a few days or a week before relapsing. The constant cycle was taking a toll on my well-being, affecting my career, social life, and overall happiness. I spiraled out of control for several years, reaching a point where I couldn't ignore the negative impact any longer. I reached a breaking point and decided that enough was enough. I had allowed myself to reach 400lbs, lost all ambition, and found every moment at work consumed by thoughts of alcohol. It was then that I started viewing alcohol as a poison. I turned to podcasts and RUclips channels discussing the harmful effects of alcohol on the body, and I also downloaded the "I Am Sober" app. This app allowed me to interact with others, celebrate milestones, and seek support when needed. The combination of these factors made me determined never to pick up alcohol again. I genuinely believe that anyone can achieve sobriety; they just need to desire it more than anything else. Quitting alcohol has been the best decision I've ever made for myself, positively impacting my family, friends, professional life, and more. I understand this is a lengthy response, but I hope you find some elements that resonate with you on your journey. You have the strength to overcome it, you are valuable, and you are loved. Sometimes, it's hard to see these things when you're in the fog of addiction. @@illijillijilli
I'm a huge comedy fan and I love to talk to people about which comedians they think are funny. It's a great insight into what kind of a person someone is. I've found, to my surprise that a lot of people think Bert is the funniest comedian they know. I have never found him funny but there's no accounting for taste. I'm just glad that "Jeff dunham" is an answer i hear far less than i used to.
I once knew a woman who *loves* Jeff Dunham, and she was quite alright herself. Dunham is a good ventriloquist, so I can at least enjoy the talent despite his act essentially being dad jokes with puppets. Burt, on the other hand, I never exactly disliked; I just knew within the first bit or two that he was never gonna land with me, and that was confirmed for the next 45 minutes, solid.
Sad but completely true. Although I hated his puppet act and was somewhat frustrated with how popular it was for so long, Dunham can actually be pretty damn funny when not relying on the prop comedy puppet garbage like in interviews and other appearances. Such a shame the puppet act was what brought him fame and fortune.
I can personally attest that Van Wilder was NOT about Bert. Bert was obsessed with girls gone wild and they did a nationwide thing about who is the biggest party school and who in that school is beyond life itself. Our group was Bert, me Chad, M, and we had Sydney S. Me and Sydney actually were getting doctorates but Bert was partying all the time. Coming to class hungover wearing floaties on his arms. The van wilder thing was about a producer on campus trying to get inspiration for this movie when someone mentioned Bert and how he was just on Rolling Stones magazine for being essentially a giant slack off. So they bring Bert in and honestly if he was just himself they could have ran with him. But he did what he always does. He went way too far and turned away the producers. Then when the movie came out he cried saying it was about him and I’m like dude these are the fliers. There’s probably 20 dudes that think they’re the guy when it’s not like that. The 3 of us got really close until he started having success in California. It’s like Bert doesn’t know how to be a best friend. If you’re in his life it’s because you play a part. Sydney got cancer in 2017 and Bert was nowhere to be seen. He flew to his funeral and tried to talk to us like we were friends again but people legitimately walked away from him while he was talking and he started crying. Got back into his car, and he left. He’s a trashy person and a train wreck of a friend. Idc how many wanna say it’s the internet and people can say anything. I have receipts and I have videos with me and Sydney so fork you (thanks RUclips for making me edit that one)
......the moive script says its based off the Rolling Stones story.......yall really are so desperate to just follow a crowd and hate on someone and lie for now reason lol
Bert was definitely working in 2017 supporting a family, you expect him to drop everything, cancel tours to visit your sick friend? At least he made an effort to show up at the funeral. You guys sound like a bunch of shitty friends to walk away when someone is talking to you at a funeral
@kylefarrell25 I did read his comment, hes saying none of the movie was based on Bert at all but the story writers specifically reference the rolling stones article by name and also say it was based on just "college frat life".
I remember hearing this story on Bob and Tom radio sometime around 2010, and figured the guy telling the story disappeared. Then I saw they made a movie about it, and it blew my mind that he was still doing comedy around that story.
Reminds me of lyrics from "Succubus" by Black Dirty. "Keep rolling your eyes to the back of your head Look up where your brain lies see what you're thinking instead"
honestly the biggest problem was the youtube algorithim constantly recommending his videos and adding them as next in queue whenever anyone watched a cumtown clip. this led myself and at least a million other people to go from not knowing or caring who he was to hating him in like a 6 months period
NGL I never heard much about Burt Kreischer… but I see a Fuckton of videos about why he sucks, it’s kind of getting old. Like I get it, he’s not funny, let’s all move on
@@prestonexzabe2997he has that unlikable jockey energy about him, the Fallon laughs, it's overbearing and annoying ASF. 2 bears 1 cave was tolerable because of Tom, and most of the funny bits were them both joking together.
I knew who he was, but you're so right. I remember listening to episodes of the Bonfire while I was playing video games or whatever and constantly having to change it because 2B1C or YMH were constantly coming on, thinking "How many of these do I need to skip before the algorithm catches on?"
Pedestrians are literally people walking on foot. Bert definitely meant something more akin to "civilian," except regarding comedians and not the military.
@@markus7166 maybe he wasn’t important to you, but to many people worldwide it was a tragedy. you can’t deny the impact he had on many around the world. respecting the recently deceased is something i think we all can do. if i recall correctly he tweeted it the day of. he’s a grown ass man trying to act like an edgy teen. I get that he’s a comedian and i wouldn’t get mad over a joke but i can also say it was corny for a grown man to do. just my opinion 🤷🏻♂️
@@ollytropics1735 I think he botched Uncut Gems saying he was a fan he said Precious Gems and Happy Madison I think that was tipping point where Adam Sandler saw he was Faking it being a Fan like he could of done a google search like oh man he blew it and he kept on Interrupting him and was rude too
I swear, it’s like those high school guys who kept adding details to a made up story so he can make everyone laugh. Ain’t no damn way that machine story is even 25% true
I'll never forget him spending the time when COVID lockdowns started and he spent the 2Bears podcast literally breaking down over money worries. Then, he came up with the Standup Drive-in Theater thing, and had to take it to Tulsa, OK because only Southern states had COVID regs that would even begin to allow for that. He goes, makes plenty of money, and is riding high on the next episode of 2Bears because he's proven that his concept works. Now not worried that he'll pay bills, he spends his time talking about that gig shitting on Tulsa, shitting on Southerners, and making it obvious that he wouldn't be caught dead in the South again if he could somehow get away with only touring in LA. I will *never* forget that. It was the first time I'd ever seen a professional performer do something like that. Literally, "Now that I have your money and made it back home...god yall are stupid, dirty, and your town is boring." The fact that Bert has ever thought, let alone once that day, that he is better than any amount of Oklahomans, let alone Southerners, is the exact reason that America is as fucked as it is.
@@BendySendynah spiking someone's drink is hella messed up mate, I hate bert as much as the next guy but moral lines must be drawn and maintained even if you don't like the guy
@@jayromartinez4078to be honest Lee deserves it and ari is a jew that was "forced" to learn the kaballa. Which teaches you that you can do what you want to a nonjew
Idk if I'm weird but I've never expected most stories told by comedians to be real. It doesn't matter to me at all because their job is to tell funny stories. It's like being upset that not all movies are based on true events.
I think part of the reason might be the level of relatability and authenticity that comes with stand up comedy. It's just a guy, on a stage, talking at you. That's innately pretty intimate, and stand-up has stayed pretty close to that format for years and years. Both sides develop a parasocial relationship where relatability is a common draw for comedians. I'm not arguing with you, just trying to offer my reasoning for it.
Agree 100%. I’m no “big fan” of Bert’s, could take em or leave em. But the guy who narrated this video (and a lot of commentators) just seem very butthurt and/or jealous with an agenda to push. Guessin Bert triggered him & his feelings. Society is so soft & sensitive anymore.
@@maximiliankolbe_NINlisten, Bert has his stuff, but if you ever watch him for an extended period of time, you start to get it. He’s a goofball, a nut, but he loves his family and does what he needs to. His drinking is his own choice.
A lot of people here aren’t gonna believe me and that’s fine but my dad actually used to do photography for Burt in the early 2000s. From what I know, he was a depressed seeming guy from behind closed doors. Not like he is on camera. I know this isn’t really surprising information about Burt but I still find it hard to believe he knew him to this day. I’d have to ask my dad more about the things he saw sometime soon. He’s gotta know some juicy stuff lol. I might even be able to find old videos with Burt in them that also have my dad somewhere in them.
The worst part is that he really believes he's an amazing comic who made it on his own merit. I can't deny that he's worked hard and hustled for many years but he's always had the privilege of a family with noney to fall back on, has the most amazing luck of being in the right place at the right time repeatedly for years, and has been propped up by people who boosted him to heights he never could have achieved on his "talent".
People have families with money to fall back on in the overwhelming majority of all things people ever do. He still made it on his own. Horrible comment and just stupidly illogical. He is literally famous because of multiple viral comedy stories that he created, that's the only reason.
Oh, I love Bert! There’s the bit where he goes to Russia, there’s the bit where he gets drunk, there’s the bit where he’s topless, there’s the bit about the mafia, there’s the bit about him drinking, there’s the bit about that school trip he went on, and to top it all off… that bit where he takes his shirt off! You’ve gotta love a wacky boundary pusher!🤢🤮
I mean, I found him entertaining, though I don't exactly have a high bar or standards for that sort of shit. My favourite was the deodorant in the fridge.
Burp, bark, fart or Bart Chrysler whatever his name is would be nothing like his cousin Tim Sakura they were never meant to be top dogs they were supposed to be small time comedy club guys that were on stage before the actual funny guys showed up. < Rogan blessed the wrong people.
Joe has never faithfully participated in sober October. Dude is on a mountain of gear. Shit aint sober. Fucking wild to weigh in for his sobriety challenge with his weird steroid belly.
2 месяца назад
It’s sad you thought you were being intelligent with this comment
I have been watching turkey tom for a while now and it's hard to tell people that I listen to "peoples life's crumbling via commentary" whenever people ask what my most favourite content is
Honestly seeing that he comes from a for the most part well off family or at least wasn’t in poverty , he probably got the type of fake teeth that are actually drilling into your gums rather then like dentures and honestly you could think of these as even better then real ones at times because they aren’t as susceptible to infection or decay as regular ones are
Honestly it's kind of impressive he's gotten as far as he has. I think he's made me chuckle at his "The Machine" joke, that's as far as he's ever made me go. But he's not as unfunny as Amy Schumer. He's not as morally bankrupt as Carlos Mencia. He's not as aggressive and impossible not to hate as Andrew Dice Clay. All things considered, he's not funny, but you can say that about like at least 50% of stand up comics.
I have to disagree about the MDMA incident. It was very much addressed. Bert's wife was super pissed at Ari. After it happened, she didn't want her kids around him, too. Bert and Ari's friendship almost came to end. I think things are a lot better, nowadays.
@@databattlesz There was no meth involved, Ari put molly in Berts drink, and he pretty much got slammed by everyone for doing so, as it's seriously not at all funny to do so to anyone.
The funniest thing about the machine story (and maybe the only funny thing) is after he told the story everyone started calling him the machine. He’s not the smartest guy so he thought they were asking for him to tell the story. Which is why he repeats it so often
The fact that people are so utterly obsessed with that completely untrue story is nothing short of baffling. I guarantee you the truth of that story begins and ends with Burt went to Russia. Yeah buddy. You participated in international armed robbery and there were no consequences afterwards ok.
@@seanjenkins5505 An international robbery in Russia during the 1990s though. Totally possible for that kind of thing to occur and go completely unpunished. You could easily bribe police in Russia during that time and for that matter to this very day. The only difference is that today they have a very Anti-American regime so an American would probably be arrested for that in the current day. Back in the 1990s though? They didn't give a fuck. The Soviet government dissolved and as a result government employees like police turned to corruption for their paycheck. That's a fact. I actually believe there is probably some truth to the story even though I don't really like Burt and I don't really find the story funny.
Burp, bark, fart or Bart Chrysler whatever his name is would be nothing like his cousin Tim Sakura they were never meant to be top dogs they were supposed to be small time comedy club guys that were on stage before the actual funny guys showed up. < Rogan blessed the wrong people.
Thank you for making this? Why? If you don’t like him don’t watch or listen to him it’s that easy. Let people make their own decisions. He sells out arenas so he’s doing something right.
@@justingagnier1394 I thanked Turkey Tom for making this because he actually explained things in a way that made me realize the actual reasons why I don’t think Bert is funny. I’m not hating on anyone that finds him funny. Why do you feel the need to tell me that I don’t have to watch him if I don’t think he’s funny?
My favourite is when Bert was doing his fake laugh to William Montgomerys joke and William screamed at him (ITS NOT THAT FUCKIN FUNNY DUDE!!!) which made the rest of the panel laugh harder cause they knew it was a diss.
bert's like a new band you just found, you listen to their music and you're hyped then the more you hesr the more you realize all their songs sound the same
Definitely a reminder of how dumb luck and knowing the right people are more important than any other factor when it comes to success. His appeal basically starts and ends at "guy who is kind of funny once in a long while" which is great for casual friendships but to force celebrity on it is like building on a foundation of sand. The most offensive thing about him is the amount of success he's had despite being on par with most bar regulars when it comes to humor/depth.
Still shocked me when I saw Bert's giant stomache on a truck driving around as a giant ad around Garden Grove. I knew he was big but that put it into perspective
Bert is the perfect example of "it's who you know" it seriously makes me nauseous knowing he sells out arenas (IF YOU HAVEN'T HEARD). Plus it doesn't help he only talks about himself like he's actually done something in life and has influenced millions. The only ones impressed are his fellow pigs he squeals with
I seriously hope you're joking man 😭 caring so much about another man's success is genuinely insane. and calling his friends "pigs" like bro what. did he hurt you or something
@charleswhite688 I bet you play with your vag and squeal along with bert while you watch his HILARIOUS specials. you're not the meat rider you're the pilot 🫡
His movies can be hit and miss sometimes, but he's never lost his genuinely cool guy vibe. There's plenty of stories where he was a really decent/nice person, having said that.....if you make a person like that hate you or your interview in 5 minutes, you fucked up 😂
I’ve always been fascinated when someone is aggressively trying to be the the center of attention and everyone knows they are lying except for themselves. Someone being oblivious to how how they are being perceived and not seeing or understanding any clear social cues is such an fascinating thing to watch.
@@placeholder_ who the hell comments then gets mad about what state a stranger is from then angry they got a like on their comment?! and u think California people are bad hahaha
everyone knows a real truth teller, the type that will retell a story u told them right in front of u but claim it happend to them, sucks that Netflix and rogan made those losers rich lol
The fact that he loves watching himself on the big screen to the point that he immediately starts crying (while actors usually despise watching themselves) is really everything you need to know about the guy. Perfect summary of his personality. Man am I glad that that movie bombed hard.
just because some actors don’t like watching themselves doesn’t mean they ALL must hate watching themselves. you’re trying to be an armchair psychologist and it doesn’t work. Imagine being happy something someone loved working on bombed hard, and getting mad he was so happy with the movie he cried
As a Russian speaker, I can confirm that there is absolutely no way in Russian language to somehow misspeak his name as The Machine because it is literally the same word but spoken like Machina with A instead of silent E.
Yeah if you believe that his story is real then you're dumb. I feel like most stand up comedians fabricate stories and tell them as if they were real but there is an unspoken understanding that both the audience knows that the story isn't true and the comedian knows that the audience knows that the story isn't true but everybody goes along with it for the sake of humor. Bert tells this story over and over and over again as if it's 100% true and people all over the place actually believe it.
I thought the joke was that instead of saying his name he panicked and said the machine, not that he misspoke his name in Russian, i could be wrong its been a while since ive seen that show. Not that im defending his humor, just if we are going to judge the jokes at least get the details right.
I remember stumbling across the clip from "The Machine" special and watching it I remember being slightly entertained by the outlandishness of the story I also remember being highly confused by his lack of a shirt
Anytime something bad or wrong allegedly happens to Burt , it's really hard to believe it because of how huge his ego is and how much of a narcissist he is
Everytime I see a mildly interesting 20 minute video about any human being I pray that Turkish Thomas will make a video 5 times as long and 10 times as detailed
@@GeeMannnit seems most mini-docs like this involve the creator taking all their info from the farms nowadays 🫤 sometimes you can even find the same posts on threads and what a youtuber is saying will be copy and paste the exact same
Bert is like a thing where the dynamics of it's working parts illuminate in intuitively straightforward terms certain essential qualities of him as an individual.
anyone else notice the little editing error at about 38:12 ? "they did little harm to Burt's reputation- they did very little harm to Burt's actual reputation" kinda cool to see how tom's voice is so stable its hard to notice the editing
Video is titled “the most insufferable comedian”. Two minutes in and I find out Joe Rogan played a big role in getting him off the ground. Oh how shocking.
The Joe Rogan Industrial Complex has done almost the same anount of damage to American standup comedy rhat the Seth Rogen Industrial Complex has done to American comedy cinema or the Seth MacFarlane Industrial Complex has done to Ameican adult animation.
To me Bert is the definition of someone who can be funny while you drink a few beers with your friends, but never a comedian.
Hes my Uncle Jack..
the dude hangs around Joe Rogan who's already a huge clown and followed by MAGA MAGGOTs
I like his stories. He's a great story teller
@@RAZORWlND The same Uncle Jack that you help off a horse?
@@gappuma7883 Tolkien was a great story teller. Bert is a slobbering tard
Burt is like that Kid who invites you over to his house to play video games only to make you sit there and watch him
And talk about himself the whole time 😂
Accurate.
Yoooo this is so on point 😂
🤣🤣🤣
Uh hundred percent lol. Watching him on Rogan is the best cuz Joe will shut his shit down, and Bart pouts like a toddler if he isn’t the center of attention.
The problem with Bert's "sobriety" is that he's not actually staying sober. He'll say he hasn't drank anything in 23 days, but then say things like, "Well I did have a glass of wine with my wife in the hot tub. But I don't count those." or "I haven't drank all week! Actually I had a couple beers yesterday, but they were nothing."
Imma be honest, that shit is pretty funny to me.
@@badman2733pretty sad more than anything
@@badman2733 An alcoholic in denial who has young kids, yeah, hilarious.
@@badman2733but you’re laughing at his denial, and inability to commit to it. Not his jokes lol
@@adamlegros1180, still means he is funny
There's nothing worse than having a friend that forces you to watch stand up that isn't funny and trying to act entertained.
Am I the only person that refuses to play this game?
I just say it's not my thing and move on
That's every friend trying to make anyone watch stand up.
with my mom be like
I think we should make it illegal to share videos, with anyone. That way no one can shove their phone in your face, and if you see something funny, you better make damn sure your friend will appreciate the recommendation and not snitch.
My boyfriend showed me one of his stand up sets and im like "so hes just....shirtless and drunk???" Bro we live in FL we get that free lmao
You can your boyfriend bro? That's strange
@@dawsondetrana5496what are you on about?
are you drunk Dawson?@@dawsondetrana5496
@@dawsondetrana5496strange you latched on to that figure of speech and escalated it to imply incest that quickly tbh
@@dawsondetrana5496what does that even mean? "You can your boyfriend?" No you idiot it's illegal to cut people up and put them in metallic packaging.
Bert really burned his own career by surrounding himself with actual funny people.
I was just thinking I kind of enjoy the podcast clips I see but realized it wasn’t because of him almost at all
Or maybe..... the other comedians hung around with him to make themselves look funnier? Same tactic as groups of girls always having the one 2 to make the 6 and 7s look better by comparison
"Surrounded by actual funny people"
--Source Required....
Tom Segura's stand-up is great and Mark Normand is hilarious. Not too sure about anyone else Bert hangs out with.
Glass houses...@PWRGEUTTP
The most hilarious thing about Bert is his movie based off his only famous joke was a financial bomb at the box office.
A fake story that he made up also. Lol
@@kd9896Welcome to -comedy- media
I guess Mark Hamill didn’t wisely invest or save his TLJ money. It’s like he seeks out horrible roles now
@@brianmurphy250bro thats free money. He could retire just from his VA work which is 1 in a million rare for a VA to do. He probably just thought it was funny or owed someone a favor.
His movie did more money the first few weeks than two movies released the same year featuring Robert Deniro and Russell Crowe.
Yo who the fuck spikes their friend when they're trying to do a month sober? That's beyond fucked up
(((who))) indeed
Ari does, he's a piece of garbage, unfunny and yet still gets attention because he's controversial.
Yeah but at the same time the guy claims to be ‘the machine’ and makes a bunch of money off of calling himself that… and he can’t handle a little trip?
The fact that Ari Shaffir has two stories of drugging people is nuts
Ari is a sociopath
Nothing will ever top Bart's violently distorted perception of his own physique
Right!? I think HE thinks he looks slim, it's fucking wild.
I thought that was just part of the joke? Like he was just poking fun at himself like some heavier guys do. But if he was doing / saying those things un-ironically, then holy shit
It's part of the joke, he definitely knows he's out of shape and has said that before.
Didn't he tell Rogan he can do more push ups or someone way more fit than him? It was a diabolical clip
Is it Bart Simpson you're talking about?
In early 2020 I was on a terrible path.
On day 4 of a drug/ alcohol fueled bender I woke up in a strange apartment on an air mattress to a shirtless Bert on max volume and a room full of idiots laughing.
I was so absolutely disgusted in that moment that I decided enough was enough.
I went back to college, got a career, got my life together.
I now own a home and have a nice life.
Thank you Bert.
congrats on getting out of that situation man
Nuh uh... if thats all it took, congrats 🎉
Sounds truly nightmarish
It took you 3 years to graduate from college and buy a house after a 4 day bender? Wtf bro
All that in less than 4 years….
You lie
Bert is the Dj Khaled of the comedy scene
Nailed it 👊
Ouch, you’re so right it hurts.
Lmao so true
But DJ Khaled is actually funny
@@StolenVHS and he isnt even trying to be
fake suppressed high-pitched squealing noises
Unbearable
It's the absolute most annoying thing I've ever seen. Then faking as if you cant talk. 🤮
Bert is so self obsessive he definitely watched this at least 3 times 😅
Underrated comment 10/10
Then thought, "man this guy really thinks I'm funny!"
There’s no way lol
Chase, the fact you are bashing someone 1,000 times more successful than you who doesn't even know you exist is hilarious.
@@facetiouslyinsolent8313Bert is that you?!?
Bert’s the type of guy to wake up his entire house to tell them he’s going to bed
man i can out point you in a kickboxing match
Jesus, why is this so true?
Wait a second, is this abnormal? Everyone needs to know... it just makes sense- everyone needs to know when I am attempting sleep =\
And then wake them up again in 10 minutes to remind them to remind him to set his alarm in 15 minutes so he can get up and wake them up again, to prepare him breakfast.
@@take7upyours822 😭😭 this comment had me cracking up. Don’t forget the middle of the night announcement that he peed and remembered to flush the toilet
Tom Segura was the worst possible person Bert could’ve been friends with. They just feed off each other in the worst way
Can you elaborate? I like Tom but I’m curious to know
@@TtloreTom is a bit of a psychopath and enables Bert quite a bit. Best example is their podcast with Dr. Huberman where Tom tells Huberman about all the terrible habits Bert does to get a shock reaction out of him. Now just repeat this same interaction to every guest that Tom and Bert get and you’ll get the picture. Tom loves using Bert as his personal circus freak show.
@@franciscoanguiano983810000%
@@franciscoanguiano9838 To be fair that's the whole shtick. Bert's only comedic value is self deprication so that's ultimately the entire podcast. With that being said you're right though, they actually drag each other down.
i honestly think Tom sees Bert like he's his dog
Burt asking Adam Sandler “Do you have Netflix” while Sandler had the biggest Netflix deal at the time is hilarious
Burt behaved as if he’s been one of Sandler’s boys being disrespectful, but Sandler’s boys would never ask him such questions they know what’s off limits Sandler has been consistent in decades of interviews always gets triggered at a “what’s your favorite movie you’ve filmed” question I’ve seen him have this reaction only to that question honestly
The fact that Bert is a multi-millionaire only goes to show just how unfair life is.
Multi millionaire right now. If he is still that rich in 5-10 years, I will be impressed.
I say this in mind that MC Hammer/ Mike Tyson used to be multi millionaires
They all come from the same families. They all know each other.
I noticed it when I was a kid.
@@brianmurphy250 Mike Tyson is broke?
wealthy upbringing + mild interest = wealthier adulthood.
its not about what you do its about who you know
@@StopCopCity1312 who is they? Fat white people?
I remember hearing that story years ago and thinking hey that’s kinda funny, I wonder what he’ll do next. And then he never did anything next.
@PWRGEUTTP30yo headass 😂
@PWRGEUTTPmf bought a bot to spam comments
@@callmeacutekitten8106 They've emigrated from Moist Critical. I wonder if AI is going to destroy the internet?
Yes indeed🎉
Burnt Chrysler is one of the most unaware "comedians" (besides Bapa Schaub.) It's fascinating to observe. As a pedestrian.
Sounding like a real poor right now 😂
@@scumbagjesus999 Obviously part of the wash cloth mafia lmao
💀
The entire way this comment is worded is so funny
Git a washcloth as a cum rag don't ya YOUR POOR IDIOT and if you criticize a rich person it must be because we're miserable 😅
Bert is just one Good Will Hunting "it's not your fault Bert" speech away from completely melting down
haven’t seen it , but is that where the family guy scene with a line close to that comes from
Adam Sandler telling Bert he never wants to see him again made him my hero. I wish I could never see Bert again.
Isn't Adam Sandler known to be a surprisingly nice guy in person? That makes it even better
@@Stringbean1138 can confirm, i've met him in person and he really is so damn nice, and it doesn't come off as fake or just tolerance. he means it and enjoys being nice.
@@Stringbean1138 he def looks like cool uncle vibe
Was he being serious? I don't see what was wrong with the question. Seems like typical fluff. Someone fill me in
@@darknevermore3 Yeah he was serious, I doubt hate is in Adam Sandlers ability the guy seems so damn nice but at the time I believe he meant he was experiencing one of the worst interviews he's ever been a part of
Bert is the most prominent example of "its not who you are its who you know"
No that’s shaub
@@lanestewart7836 both pretty good examples
@@lanestewart7836Bert is the prominent example of "failing upwards"
“It’s not what you know, it’s who you know”
That’s not even the saying lmfao. Either way it’s not a negative notion anyway. Anyone with any business sense knows that who you know is the biggest key to a successful business.
Its honestly sad the lengths Bert will go to to defend alcoholism
Potent observation.
That’s the biggest thing for me… I feel for his little girls 😔
That's what alcoholics do, its denial
That's addiction folk's.😮
All alcoholics do that
The gallon of kool aid moment is one of my favorite podcast moments, Tom dying of laughter is so endearing.
I've watched 2 Bears 1 Cave since the 1st episode, but reached a point that seeing Bert romanticizing everything around his alcoholism to deny he has an addiction problem just got sad, no matter how hard Tom and the booth boys were laughing about it.
Yeah, I had to stop watching for that reason. As someone who is currently battling alcohol addiction, he just became so unhelpful
And beyond that, he's so obnoxious on a social level. He always interupts Tom, and says the dumbest shit.
Or him talk for 80% of the episode about random dog shit that no one cares about or even is remotely funny.
ruclips.net/video/vbMCa0g-44g/видео.html
I only watch the episodes where he's on break. He's fucking ear cancer personified. And so narcissistic he'll probably watch this video in bed 20 or 30x and obsessively go through the comments wondering why nobody can appreciate his greatness properly.
Bert's podcast is pretty much the same as every narcissist LA comedian. It's about "be a guest on my show and listen to me talk about myself for two hours".
ruclips.net/video/vbMCa0g-44g/видео.html
I seriously don't understand the need for every fucking person in LA to have their own podcast these days
@@sokkatomeson7561what?
You mean narcissist Texas comedians, because all the worst offending chuds were "forced to flee" from LA for uh, real reasons that are very real.
@@ellespera lot of people would just chat about whatever for money if they could, and it gets money and listens. that's the reason it's done. there are a million weird stupid things being done for money that others actually want or pay for or waste time consuming. not sure why we are singling this guy out like he's more insufferable than what gets a ton of attention
A sober month is not the way to treat alcoholism. It's easy to not drink when you have set a future date that you wait and skip the whole month with nothing in mind but make through the "tough time" and reward yourself with a drink. The real challenge is not to drink ever again, face the void and manage through. Anyone out there in denial, just be honest to yourself and best of luck.
Drinking is fine in moderation, just like everything else.
It's a different world for addicts.@@Caramelldansen9999
@Caramelldansen9999 true but if it's progressed into an addiction, even drinking in moderation can be a slippery slope just due to the nature of alcohol. For some people, agreeing to a single drink can easily end with them being blackout drunk and still trying to have more :c
Well put. Shouldn't play with fire. @@MagicWhatsItCalled
and an addict would convince themself that it's moderate, it's under control.
His funniest joke to me when he brought in a huge thermos of koolaid and Tom lost his shit.
What’s wild about that clip is that it’s textbook alcoholism. My dad did the same thing, he hovered up Gatorade and other sugary drinks during the morning hangovers to stave off the pain. Alcoholics always dive into something to help offset the side effects of alcohol so they don’t have to stop drinking.
Bert is great example of how important confidence is, even if that confidence is not backed up by anything.
I'd be confident too if I had my mom and dad funding everything for me so I could do whatever I wanted. Some of us need to be less risky, cuz we do not have anything to fall back on.
@@midnightroads4180Fr
@@midnightroads4180perfect response. Very true. I wish I grew up with the privileges he had.
You dont act like this if youre confident. Only people full of fear act like this.
He's not confident. He's a delusional narcissist
Ari is such a sociopath man, it's crazy how he gets away with so much dirtbag shit without repercussions.
Every time I hear anything about him it's about how he fucked with somebody
Benefits of being apart of the tribe 🙏👃
yeah, that guy needs to get caught for littering in Singapore
Also, how the majority of his improv bits revolve around him saying pedo shit. Dude is a walking red flag
@@mkv2718 Ronny Chieng 👀
Bert is the type of guy where you await the moment he speaks so you can enjoy walking away.
Burp, bark, fart or Bart Chrysler whatever his name is would be nothing like his cousin Tim Sakura they were never meant to be top dogs they were supposed to be small time comedy club guys that were on stage before the actual funny guys showed up. < Rogan blessed the wrong people.
@@AlienX-dw9sztom’s actually funny though. he’s gotten a bit arrogant sure but he’s always been funny
Segura used to be my favorite comedian after Bill Burr, but he's turned into whatever the male equivalent of a Karen is
😂😂😂
It's crazy how he is actually a funny person but people find cringey things and just focus on that
I do not care enough about his actual life or how he became famous, I just watch his specials and laugh because that's what he's tryna do
ngl the bit with rogan and the others supporting the health of bert is endearing
I met Bert at an airport lobby, he was very kind and called me “brother” our whole interaction. Over an hour or so, he drank 3 wine glasses and I distinctly remember him filling two water bottles full of alcohol before leaving. He also had airport staff escort him from the lounge dispute no major disruptions or crowds forming. Wish him and his family the best
Bert is set. But he’s trying to fly too close to the sun.
He just kinda sounds like an okay and nice guy from a personal level, and is probably kinda funny, but is sort of like an alcoholic uncle who has a lot of issues
Bro definitely made that up lmao
@@lucasfilbert1726 it’s probably Bert on one of his fake accounts 🤣
@@Jezeus11 Right? My favorite comedians are always on the straight and narrow. Carlin, Kinison, Pryor. All clean cut dudes.
22:40 It's worth noting that "The Machine" story had multiple waves of popularity, and this was only the latest one. I remember way back when I was in high school, circa 2009, there was another clip of him telling the story that was going viral. It's just hard for anyone who wasn't around back then to find out about it since all the social media from back then is dead (i.e. Myspace).
Hey Tom, love your deep dives a lot it’s just good RUclips. Would love if you did a deep dive on the late great Norm Macdonald. There is a lot to dig up about his career that I never hear anyone talk about. Like his first bout of cancer in the late 80’s.
Keep doing the crazy livestreams too, watching you on the Destiney stream take the W over the annoying irk was hilarious!
Seconded. Would love to watch a proper deep dive on the Ol’ Chunk of Coal.
Is that the Bully music? Incredible. Good video. Almost stopped because I was like “I don’t like Bert why am I gonna watch this” and watched nearly the whole thing.
As someone who struggled heavily with alcohol for 13 years and is now sober, I've become acutely aware of the destructive patterns, the subtle lies, the lapses in judgment, and the tendency to constantly interrupt others that accompany alcoholism. When you're in the throes of addiction, everything revolves around it, and nothing else seems to matter. Did you say hurtful things? No problem, just blame it on the alcohol. Did you mistreat your friends? No big deal, I was blacked out, sorry!
I used to be a huge fan of Bert's, but having emerged from that dark period of addiction, all I can do now is empathize with those still struggling. It's evident that Bert recognizes that he feels great when sober, as he has discussed it on numerous occasions in podcasts and elsewhere, but he always seems to immediately contradict them with excuses only two seconds later. It seems he may have exhausted all available options, and even his close friends are growing weary. Sometimes, cutting ties is the only way to help someone.
I genuinely hope he can find the strength to achieve sobriety.
Same it took many tires to get and stay sober but I’m always and I I think everyone is a better person when sober. Making friends and connections and calling people helps me a bunch with AA aside from the meetings themselves. Meetings are good but if I don’t reach out to others and make connections AA wouldn’t work for me.
100% I was never an alcoholic but after i gave up drinking completely in 2020 i started to find Bert's comedy incredibly sad and pathetic!
Thankfully I never had a problem with alcohol but I know people who died because they couldnt get off of the stuff. Its incredibly tragic to lose a 20-something to addiction.
Glad you got clean brother 💪
@@illijillijilli Try NA if AA isn't working for you. Ive found that finding a meeting or meetings that you relate to the people is a big thing. A lot of the time some meetings have weird vibes that push new people away. Most importantly though, just push through the steps and be honest with you sponsor and the meeting about how hard it is for you. Chances are people will relate and help you in some way. whether its just commiserating or giving some insights into how it feels afterwards. Doing the steps (some of them daily) will def free you my friend. In my experience, the program is about replacing good feelings (drinking) with better feelings (being a part of humanity and living in the world as yourself). Its very rewarding in the end. I wish you the best.
I'm 38, and I began drinking around the age of 18. Initially, it was for enjoyment at parties or to feel at ease in new social settings. However, when I turned 21, things took a turn for the worse. By the time I reached 26, I had become a full-blown alcoholic.
Over the next 4-5 years, I made multiple attempts to quit, but each time I only managed to go a few days or a week before relapsing. The constant cycle was taking a toll on my well-being, affecting my career, social life, and overall happiness. I spiraled out of control for several years, reaching a point where I couldn't ignore the negative impact any longer.
I reached a breaking point and decided that enough was enough. I had allowed myself to reach 400lbs, lost all ambition, and found every moment at work consumed by thoughts of alcohol. It was then that I started viewing alcohol as a poison. I turned to podcasts and RUclips channels discussing the harmful effects of alcohol on the body, and I also downloaded the "I Am Sober" app. This app allowed me to interact with others, celebrate milestones, and seek support when needed. The combination of these factors made me determined never to pick up alcohol again.
I genuinely believe that anyone can achieve sobriety; they just need to desire it more than anything else. Quitting alcohol has been the best decision I've ever made for myself, positively impacting my family, friends, professional life, and more.
I understand this is a lengthy response, but I hope you find some elements that resonate with you on your journey. You have the strength to overcome it, you are valuable, and you are loved. Sometimes, it's hard to see these things when you're in the fog of addiction.
@@illijillijilli
I'm a huge comedy fan and I love to talk to people about which comedians they think are funny. It's a great insight into what kind of a person someone is. I've found, to my surprise that a lot of people think Bert is the funniest comedian they know. I have never found him funny but there's no accounting for taste. I'm just glad that "Jeff dunham" is an answer i hear far less than i used to.
What you don't like puppets bro?!
I would instantly stop talking to that person lol
I once knew a woman who *loves* Jeff Dunham, and she was quite alright herself. Dunham is a good ventriloquist, so I can at least enjoy the talent despite his act essentially being dad jokes with puppets.
Burt, on the other hand, I never exactly disliked; I just knew within the first bit or two that he was never gonna land with me, and that was confirmed for the next 45 minutes, solid.
Sad but completely true. Although I hated his puppet act and was somewhat frustrated with how popular it was for so long, Dunham can actually be pretty damn funny when not relying on the prop comedy puppet garbage like in interviews and other appearances. Such a shame the puppet act was what brought him fame and fortune.
Jeff Dunham is a fuckin’ hack. Otto and George forever.
I can personally attest that Van Wilder was NOT about Bert. Bert was obsessed with girls gone wild and they did a nationwide thing about who is the biggest party school and who in that school is beyond life itself. Our group was Bert, me Chad, M, and we had Sydney S. Me and Sydney actually were getting doctorates but Bert was partying all the time. Coming to class hungover wearing floaties on his arms. The van wilder thing was about a producer on campus trying to get inspiration for this movie when someone mentioned Bert and how he was just on Rolling Stones magazine for being essentially a giant slack off. So they bring Bert in and honestly if he was just himself they could have ran with him. But he did what he always does. He went way too far and turned away the producers. Then when the movie came out he cried saying it was about him and I’m like dude these are the fliers. There’s probably 20 dudes that think they’re the guy when it’s not like that. The 3 of us got really close until he started having success in California. It’s like Bert doesn’t know how to be a best friend. If you’re in his life it’s because you play a part. Sydney got cancer in 2017 and Bert was nowhere to be seen. He flew to his funeral and tried to talk to us like we were friends again but people legitimately walked away from him while he was talking and he started crying. Got back into his car, and he left. He’s a trashy person and a train wreck of a friend. Idc how many wanna say it’s the internet and people can say anything. I have receipts and I have videos with me and Sydney so fork you (thanks RUclips for making me edit that one)
Damn dude, that’s crazy. I always associated Bert as this goofy party lovable guy but this video and your comment really opened my eyes
......the moive script says its based off the Rolling Stones story.......yall really are so desperate to just follow a crowd and hate on someone and lie for now reason lol
Bert was definitely working in 2017 supporting a family, you expect him to drop everything, cancel tours to visit your sick friend? At least he made an effort to show up at the funeral. You guys sound like a bunch of shitty friends to walk away when someone is talking to you at a funeral
@kylefarrell25 I did read his comment, hes saying none of the movie was based on Bert at all but the story writers specifically reference the rolling stones article by name and also say it was based on just "college frat life".
Can’t believe how much time some people have 🤦♂️
I remember hearing this story on Bob and Tom radio sometime around 2010, and figured the guy telling the story disappeared. Then I saw they made a movie about it, and it blew my mind that he was still doing comedy around that story.
Bert is the type of guy to roll his eyes to the back of his head when he eats chocolate
Is there something wrong with that? Everyone else in the comments makes fun of stuff that is actually bad
@@lampad4549yes you cuck
"get this AWAY from me"
I’m also that type of guy :(((
Reminds me of lyrics from "Succubus" by Black Dirty.
"Keep rolling your eyes to the back of your head
Look up where your brain lies see what you're thinking instead"
The irony of his life being the inspiration for National Lampoon's Van Wilder is that Van Wilder actually grew up at the end of the movie.
That implies Bert will ever grow up 😂
Yeah because he wanted to bang Tara Reed. Also, Van Wilder's personality was really nothing like Bert's in the first place.
honestly the biggest problem was the youtube algorithim constantly recommending his videos and adding them as next in queue whenever anyone watched a cumtown clip. this led myself and at least a million other people to go from not knowing or caring who he was to hating him in like a 6 months period
NGL I never heard much about Burt Kreischer… but I see a Fuckton of videos about why he sucks, it’s kind of getting old. Like I get it, he’s not funny, let’s all move on
@@prestonexzabe2997he has that unlikable jockey energy about him, the Fallon laughs, it's overbearing and annoying ASF. 2 bears 1 cave was tolerable because of Tom, and most of the funny bits were them both joking together.
I knew who he was, but you're so right. I remember listening to episodes of the Bonfire while I was playing video games or whatever and constantly having to change it because 2B1C or YMH were constantly coming on, thinking "How many of these do I need to skip before the algorithm catches on?"
@pa1nted you said there was a problem though… where is it?
This is a great doc on Burnt Chrysler.
Imagine being the guy who calls normal people pedestrian while his personality is being and alcoholic and rather being a joke than telling them.
Pedestrians are literally people walking on foot. Bert definitely meant something more akin to "civilian," except regarding comedians and not the military.
Never been a fan when I was tuned in to the comedian bros. But Ari drugging his friend and turning him into a prop for a joke was fuuuuuuked.
Ari has narc eyes, drugging him is not cool at all. And exposing him on his own podcast. He's a backstabber?
@@Llkoliioh man, wait till you see his bad attempt at joke tweets 😅. one of the most infamous was the kobe bryant one right after he died.
He's jewish, its what they do
@@cruz8291 who gives a fuck about Kobe ? I’d probably laugh at the joke
@@markus7166 maybe he wasn’t important to you, but to many people worldwide it was a tragedy. you can’t deny the impact he had on many around the world. respecting the recently deceased is something i think we all can do. if i recall correctly he tweeted it the day of. he’s a grown ass man trying to act like an edgy teen. I get that he’s a comedian and i wouldn’t get mad over a joke but i can also say it was corny for a grown man to do. just my opinion 🤷🏻♂️
Wait, isn't Adam Sandler notoriously down to earth and chill? How TF do you fuck up so bad that Adam Sandler hates you in 5 minutes 😅
Fr all you gotta do is talk about the most recent Celtics game and you’re friends with the guy
He didn't know any of his movies but glazed him about how he's such a huge fan of his
@@ollytropics1735 what?? Dude. How are you a man child "comedian" and never watched Adam Sandler?
@@noth1ng5id hence why Adam hated him because he was evidently so fake and just trying to social climb him. 2lazy2try has a full video on it
@@ollytropics1735 I think he botched Uncut Gems saying he was a fan he said Precious Gems and Happy Madison I think that was tipping point where Adam Sandler saw he was Faking it being a Fan like he could of done a google search like oh man he blew it and he kept on Interrupting him and was rude too
To give Mohr credit, it's always better to omit Bert from your stories
Im so happy the tide is turning against Bert. Guy has one madeup story he had been riding on for decades.
I swear, it’s like those high school guys who kept adding details to a made up story so he can make everyone laugh. Ain’t no damn way that machine story is even 25% true
@@PHXNKVHXLIClove the name and pfp
and wills dick apparently which got him that initial sitcom deal
@@PHXNKVHXLIC Right! I'm sure there is a SOME truth to it, but like you said the rest is a complete fabrication.
The drunk party guy is funny for about 2 seconds then becomes just sad
I'll never forget him spending the time when COVID lockdowns started and he spent the 2Bears podcast literally breaking down over money worries. Then, he came up with the Standup Drive-in Theater thing, and had to take it to Tulsa, OK because only Southern states had COVID regs that would even begin to allow for that. He goes, makes plenty of money, and is riding high on the next episode of 2Bears because he's proven that his concept works.
Now not worried that he'll pay bills, he spends his time talking about that gig shitting on Tulsa, shitting on Southerners, and making it obvious that he wouldn't be caught dead in the South again if he could somehow get away with only touring in LA.
I will *never* forget that. It was the first time I'd ever seen a professional performer do something like that. Literally, "Now that I have your money and made it back home...god yall are stupid, dirty, and your town is boring." The fact that Bert has ever thought, let alone once that day, that he is better than any amount of Oklahomans, let alone Southerners, is the exact reason that America is as fucked as it is.
lol triggered
lOL tRiGgErEd...you are an idiot and have 0 pride in the place you are from, I garuntee it.@@derbykitten
Kinda ironic considering I don’t know… he was born in Florida? Dude is a legit retard
@@derbykitten Wat
I'm glad someone else is talking about what he did, is sucks when no one is bringing this up for how abhorrent his behavior is.
I have no awareness of this man having ever existed. This is like really well done historical fiction.
You should have just turned it off and be thankful you never knew about him
Well nobodies on the internet need to target someone to make themselves appear important. "Turkey" Tom is well named.
@@Cheepchipsable They have almost the same subscriber and view counts so not sure where you pulled the nobody card from....are you ok or..?
38:12 Tom the type of guy to tell me twice cuz I aint hear the first time
im kinda mad that Ari received no backlash for spiking someones drink with MDMA.. even moreso for his excuse about it.
Bert is that you?
@@BendySendynah spiking someone's drink is hella messed up mate, I hate bert as much as the next guy but moral lines must be drawn and maintained even if you don't like the guy
Agreed Ari is actually such a POS. Not to mention the like 3 times he beat up Bobby Lee without any major backlash either.
@@jayromartinez4078jeez
@@jayromartinez4078to be honest Lee deserves it and ari is a jew that was "forced" to learn the kaballa. Which teaches you that you can do what you want to a nonjew
for the longest time I thought 2 bears one cave was an unironic homosexual podcast lmao
As soon as I saw that his gimmick was taking his shirt off, I knew his comedy wasn't good enough to carry the act.
Lmao exactly
You're like a janitor giving stock market advice.... just stick to licking toilets! 🤣
Ofc
Idk if I'm weird but I've never expected most stories told by comedians to be real. It doesn't matter to me at all because their job is to tell funny stories. It's like being upset that not all movies are based on true events.
I think part of the reason might be the level of relatability and authenticity that comes with stand up comedy. It's just a guy, on a stage, talking at you. That's innately pretty intimate, and stand-up has stayed pretty close to that format for years and years. Both sides develop a parasocial relationship where relatability is a common draw for comedians. I'm not arguing with you, just trying to offer my reasoning for it.
Agree 100%. I’m no “big fan” of Bert’s, could take em or leave em. But the guy who narrated this video (and a lot of commentators) just seem very butthurt and/or jealous with an agenda to push. Guessin Bert triggered him & his feelings. Society is so soft & sensitive anymore.
The haters in the comments are insane but that comes with being niche. Bert has issues but who doesn’t.
@@maximiliankolbe_NINlisten, Bert has his stuff, but if you ever watch him for an extended period of time, you start to get it. He’s a goofball, a nut, but he loves his family and does what he needs to. His drinking is his own choice.
What if somebody starts the joke every time with this is 100% true and it happened I'm not lying to you this isn't a joke
A lot of people here aren’t gonna believe me and that’s fine but my dad actually used to do photography for Burt in the early 2000s. From what I know, he was a depressed seeming guy from behind closed doors. Not like he is on camera. I know this isn’t really surprising information about Burt but I still find it hard to believe he knew him to this day. I’d have to ask my dad more about the things he saw sometime soon. He’s gotta know some juicy stuff lol. I might even be able to find old videos with Burt in them that also have my dad somewhere in them.
did you ever look for those videso would acc be interested in checking them out
@@puddle3042 I found one ruclips.net/video/VMJcDTB-Zzg/видео.htmlsi=lN5JAWcvA0qFe8f0
It’s at 1:07. I’ll have to ask my dad to find more I guess.
Bert just tells “that’s crazy bro” type of stories lol
The worst part is that he really believes he's an amazing comic who made it on his own merit. I can't deny that he's worked hard and hustled for many years but he's always had the privilege of a family with noney to fall back on, has the most amazing luck of being in the right place at the right time repeatedly for years, and has been propped up by people who boosted him to heights he never could have achieved on his "talent".
Well by what you said he did make it on his own merit no?
People have families with money to fall back on in the overwhelming majority of all things people ever do. He still made it on his own. Horrible comment and just stupidly illogical. He is literally famous because of multiple viral comedy stories that he created, that's the only reason.
@@derpderpin1568not quite lil bro
It’s so badass you use the bully soundtrack, fuckin loved that game growing up
Oh, I love Bert!
There’s the bit where he goes to Russia, there’s the bit where he gets drunk, there’s the bit where he’s topless, there’s the bit about the mafia, there’s the bit about him drinking, there’s the bit about that school trip he went on, and to top it all off… that bit where he takes his shirt off! You’ve gotta love a wacky boundary pusher!🤢🤮
Honestly, him joining the Mafia in Russia will always be my favorite story
I mean, I found him entertaining, though I don't exactly have a high bar or standards for that sort of shit. My favourite was the deodorant in the fridge.
Yeah but you forgot about that one bit of him drinking around his family !!!!!!
Wow, St Pete to Tampa. That’s like moving from Manhattan to Brooklyn. Lmao
Mmmm probably more like Hoboken to Newark
calling burt kreischer a comic is like calling a scat fetishist a plumber
Burp, bark, fart or Bart Chrysler whatever his name is would be nothing like his cousin Tim Sakura they were never meant to be top dogs they were supposed to be small time comedy club guys that were on stage before the actual funny guys showed up. < Rogan blessed the wrong people.
I..... I'm scared to ask 💩
*Angel by Sarah McLachlan plays while my soul floats up to heaven after reading this comment*
@@AlienX-dw9sz Tom Segura is funny as fuck
Yikes…..that was expressive but it made me laugh
Joe has never faithfully participated in sober October. Dude is on a mountain of gear. Shit aint sober. Fucking wild to weigh in for his sobriety challenge with his weird steroid belly.
It’s sad you thought you were being intelligent with this comment
Its sad your mother didn't swallow you
38:12 - You edited you repeating yourself. Still excellent as always, just wanted to toss that in. Thank you Turkey Tom!
I have been watching turkey tom for a while now and it's hard to tell people that I listen to "peoples life's crumbling via commentary" whenever people ask what my most favourite content is
I can’t imagine how many hours you had to endure Bert’s definitely funny (not fake and annoying at all) laugh to make this video. Praying for you Tom
2 hours tops, most of it is regurgitated content from other youtubers. Barely any investigative work in this video.
@@DeusAndrew Yeah, it’s a lot harder to clip video game footage. You’re out here doing God’s work.
Tom is a douche canoe too
Just a copy and paste effort... this dude just leeches content... nothing original here!
ruclips.net/video/vbMCa0g-44g/видео.html
The most interesting about burt is he has managed to do all of this with fake teeth since high school.
Honestly seeing that he comes from a for the most part well off family or at least wasn’t in poverty , he probably got the type of fake teeth that are actually drilling into your gums rather then like dentures and honestly you could think of these as even better then real ones at times because they aren’t as susceptible to infection or decay as regular ones are
Honestly it's kind of impressive he's gotten as far as he has. I think he's made me chuckle at his "The Machine" joke, that's as far as he's ever made me go. But he's not as unfunny as Amy Schumer. He's not as morally bankrupt as Carlos Mencia. He's not as aggressive and impossible not to hate as Andrew Dice Clay. All things considered, he's not funny, but you can say that about like at least 50% of stand up comics.
He's kinda just mediocre.
You hate Andrew dice clay?
11:52 12:24 12:28
@@SilenceDogood999 He's never been funny to me, and he just acts like the least likeable person every time I've seen him in an interview.
@KarazolaX his arc on the O&A early years was where his redemption is.
I have to disagree about the MDMA incident. It was very much addressed. Bert's wife was super pissed at Ari. After it happened, she didn't want her kids around him, too. Bert and Ari's friendship almost came to end. I think things are a lot better, nowadays.
The “mdma” incident… translation, the meth incident…
I always thought ari was a piece of shit, I just never knew how deep it went.
@@databattleszwhere are you getting meth from 💀💀
i stopped listening to anything Aris in you dont do that shit
@@databattlesz There was no meth involved, Ari put molly in Berts drink, and he pretty much got slammed by everyone for doing so, as it's seriously not at all funny to do so to anyone.
The funniest thing about the machine story (and maybe the only funny thing) is after he told the story everyone started calling him the machine. He’s not the smartest guy so he thought they were asking for him to tell the story. Which is why he repeats it so often
The fact that people are so utterly obsessed with that completely untrue story is nothing short of baffling. I guarantee you the truth of that story begins and ends with Burt went to Russia. Yeah buddy. You participated in international armed robbery and there were no consequences afterwards ok.
@@seanjenkins5505 I think it was entertaining to listen to but if anyone actually believes its true they need help
Him trying to tell the machine story in the mall to a little kid after the kid asked to tell him a joke is one of the cringest moments I've ever seen.
@seanjenkins5505 His fans will show a pic of him with some guys outside of a train and claim that's proof the story is real.
@@seanjenkins5505 An international robbery in Russia during the 1990s though. Totally possible for that kind of thing to occur and go completely unpunished. You could easily bribe police in Russia during that time and for that matter to this very day. The only difference is that today they have a very Anti-American regime so an American would probably be arrested for that in the current day. Back in the 1990s though? They didn't give a fuck. The Soviet government dissolved and as a result government employees like police turned to corruption for their paycheck. That's a fact.
I actually believe there is probably some truth to the story even though I don't really like Burt and I don't really find the story funny.
the bully background music is 👩🏻🍳
I’ve never laughed or even cracked a smile at anything this guy has said or done. Thank you for making this.
Burp, bark, fart or Bart Chrysler whatever his name is would be nothing like his cousin Tim Sakura they were never meant to be top dogs they were supposed to be small time comedy club guys that were on stage before the actual funny guys showed up. < Rogan blessed the wrong people.
@@AlienX-dw9szyeah we saw your answer the other times you wrote it.
Thank you for making this? Why? If you don’t like him don’t watch or listen to him it’s that easy. Let people make their own decisions. He sells out arenas so he’s doing something right.
@@justingagnier1394 I thanked Turkey Tom for making this because he actually explained things in a way that made me realize the actual reasons why I don’t think Bert is funny. I’m not hating on anyone that finds him funny. Why do you feel the need to tell me that I don’t have to watch him if I don’t think he’s funny?
@@justingagnier1394why comment that? Are you angry other people don’t like Bert?
My favourite is when Bert was doing his fake laugh to William Montgomerys joke and William screamed at him (ITS NOT THAT FUCKIN FUNNY DUDE!!!) which made the rest of the panel laugh harder cause they knew it was a diss.
bert's like a new band you just found, you listen to their music and you're hyped then the more you hesr the more you realize all their songs sound the same
Sounds like The Smiths lmao
Bert Kreischer: The funniest comic with only one joke!
Not even a funny joke at that
Least funny
@@JimeLellojust a lobg story about joining Mafia robbin his friend failing school and being a completle ass😅
Definitely a reminder of how dumb luck and knowing the right people are more important than any other factor when it comes to success. His appeal basically starts and ends at "guy who is kind of funny once in a long while" which is great for casual friendships but to force celebrity on it is like building on a foundation of sand. The most offensive thing about him is the amount of success he's had despite being on par with most bar regulars when it comes to humor/depth.
Still shocked me when I saw Bert's giant stomache on a truck driving around as a giant ad around Garden Grove. I knew he was big but that put it into perspective
This comment made me spit my drink across the room 😂😂😂😂😂😂
@PWRGEUTTPok bot
Really warms my heart to see Tom take a break from his music career to give us this banger ❤
What @PWRGEUTTP
@PWRGEUTTPsilence, loser
@PWRGEUTTPyou doing so much for 300 followers 😂😂
@@yamom5733true, this guy thinks he will get subs for typing this sht when he can actually do the work and get organic subscribers.
@PWRGEUTTP eat poop
"Terminally weed stricken" is the best description of Joe Rogan I've heard!
Tom the type of guy to at 38:10 cut together two takes of the same part of his script
Bert is the perfect example of "it's who you know" it seriously makes me nauseous knowing he sells out arenas (IF YOU HAVEN'T HEARD). Plus it doesn't help he only talks about himself like he's actually done something in life and has influenced millions. The only ones impressed are his fellow pigs he squeals with
Idk dude you gotta actually try to be a millionaire, so many people wish they were but hasn't worked towards it, he has
It ain’t who you know, it’s who you blow
@phillyspecial1393 if Joe Rogan didn't exist we'd have no idea who bert is
I seriously hope you're joking man 😭 caring so much about another man's success is genuinely insane. and calling his friends "pigs" like bro what. did he hurt you or something
@charleswhite688 I bet you play with your vag and squeal along with bert while you watch his HILARIOUS specials. you're not the meat rider you're the pilot 🫡
Tom the typa guy to draw eyes on his eyelids so he can sleep in class
this is funnier than anything Bert ever said
@PWRGEUTTP👋
@PWRGEUTTPI am going to touch you
When you have Adam Sandler tell you he doesn’t ever want to see you again. 😂
His movies can be hit and miss sometimes, but he's never lost his genuinely cool guy vibe. There's plenty of stories where he was a really decent/nice person, having said that.....if you make a person like that hate you or your interview in 5 minutes, you fucked up 😂
I’ve always been fascinated when someone is aggressively trying to be the the center of attention and everyone knows they are lying except for themselves.
Someone being oblivious to how how they are being perceived and not seeing or understanding any clear social cues is such an fascinating thing to watch.
@@placeholder_ “who the fook is that guy”
@@placeholder_ ok boomer. 🙄
@@placeholder_ who the hell comments then gets mad about what state a stranger is from then angry they got a like on their comment?! and u think California people are bad hahaha
everyone knows a real truth teller, the type that will retell a story u told them right in front of u but claim it happend to them, sucks that Netflix and rogan made those losers rich lol
Thank you. One of my biggest peeves that I could never define with precision.
The fact that he loves watching himself on the big screen to the point that he immediately starts crying (while actors usually despise watching themselves) is really everything you need to know about the guy. Perfect summary of his personality. Man am I glad that that movie bombed hard.
just because some actors don’t like watching themselves doesn’t mean they ALL must hate watching themselves. you’re trying to be an armchair psychologist and it doesn’t work. Imagine being happy something someone loved working on bombed hard, and getting mad he was so happy with the movie he cried
@@localirishgamercringe
@@smirfbroil6934bro just learned the phrase “armchair psychologist” and was so excited to use it 😂
😅😅😅😅
Yeah how uncomfortable would it be to sit there and cry while watching yourself. At least he knows he’s a narcissist. Probably was hard too.
As a Russian speaker, I can confirm that there is absolutely no way in Russian language to somehow misspeak his name as The Machine because it is literally the same word but spoken like Machina with A instead of silent E.
Yeah if you believe that his story is real then you're dumb. I feel like most stand up comedians fabricate stories and tell them as if they were real but there is an unspoken understanding that both the audience knows that the story isn't true and the comedian knows that the audience knows that the story isn't true but everybody goes along with it for the sake of humor. Bert tells this story over and over and over again as if it's 100% true and people all over the place actually believe it.
@@FIDEL_CASHFLOW_To be fair people have come forward saying they were on that trip, and at least some of it is true. I don't know.🤷
@JohnClark-tt2bl the trip might be true. Everything else is horseshit
@@JohnClark-tt2bl Yeah but not that part, the word just isnt that different
I thought the joke was that instead of saying his name he panicked and said the machine, not that he misspoke his name in Russian, i could be wrong its been a while since ive seen that show. Not that im defending his humor, just if we are going to judge the jokes at least get the details right.
I remember stumbling across the clip from "The Machine" special and watching it
I remember being slightly entertained by the outlandishness of the story
I also remember being highly confused by his lack of a shirt
What a top tier mini-doc, great work TT
"The machine" is probably the only thing I remember about Bert
Anytime something bad or wrong allegedly happens to Burt , it's really hard to believe it because of how huge his ego is and how much of a narcissist he is
16:19 i just realized the background music is the 2006 bully theme song while running around bullworth
It’s wild that the market for criticizing Bert is so big, that there’s now a market analyzing the videos criticizing him.😂
What a nightmare 😂
Everytime I see a mildly interesting 20 minute video about any human being I pray that Turkish Thomas will make a video 5 times as long and 10 times as detailed
Half his views are people posting hate. Bert's a lolcow now 100%
has been for a long while
If you end up on turkey toms RUclips channel then it's most likely he scrapped info on you from the kiwis at the farms.
@@GeeMannnit seems most mini-docs like this involve the creator taking all their info from the farms nowadays 🫤 sometimes you can even find the same posts on threads and what a youtuber is saying will be copy and paste the exact same
@@amarantalagana1490 yeah it sucks but you just can't stop the grift
Bert is like a thing where the dynamics of it's working parts illuminate in intuitively straightforward terms certain essential qualities of him as an individual.
Tom's the type of guy to sound optimistic when saying "leave me alone."
Wrong chanel
his life was like a party, but every party ends
The party ended a long time ago
anyone else notice the little editing error at about 38:12 ? "they did little harm to Burt's reputation- they did very little harm to Burt's actual reputation" kinda cool to see how tom's voice is so stable its hard to notice the editing
Yeah sometimes video essays accidentally forget to remove a retake of small clip
I've been noticing that quite a bit in a lot of different videos lately.
his shtick wasn’t sustainable and ran its course
Video is titled “the most insufferable comedian”. Two minutes in and I find out Joe Rogan played a big role in getting him off the ground. Oh how shocking.
The Joe Rogan Industrial Complex has done almost the same anount of damage to American standup comedy rhat the Seth Rogen Industrial Complex has done to American comedy cinema or the Seth MacFarlane Industrial Complex has done to Ameican adult animation.
@@tjenadonn6158nah...those other guys have some funny stuff. Joes folks DO NOT.
@@jimberlygridder183agreed😊
@@jimberlygridder183 Segura is funny, but I don't know how much of one of Joe's guys he is.