Philomena Cunk on Jesus - Part 1
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- Опубликовано: 13 сен 2024
- Miracles like walking on wine or helping a deaf man see...
Twitter: OnCunk
Sharing all things Cunk - a fictional character from Charlie Brooker's Weekly Wipe, Cunk on Britain, Cunk on Shakespeare and Cunk on Earth - Portrayed by the incredible Diane Morgan.
She ate when she said “you could say Jesus was the first celebrity victim of cancel culture” really got into character with that one.
Didn't cancel him very well did they?
He got nailed up for what, blasphemy? Nope! He committed “atheism.”
But you’re right, it wasn’t all that big a deal. In fact his “penalty” wasn’t much different than what you could expect for shoplifting.
@@Grunchy005 Preaching a different form of religion from the approved version isn't atheism, it's heresy.
@@Grunchy005 I keep reading your statement of shoplifting as Shapeshifting, how do you feel about that?
@@realhorrorshow8547 Yes definitely here say--nobody can truly tell or know, ya know?
"I think he just wanted to save them"
"...yea well they all say that don't they" 🤣🤣🤣🥂
That line hit even the blonde tooooo hard 🤣☠️
Her "They do." as an instant response is sad.
Mr Jesus Christ?
Jesus is real,, Philomena
"He was named after the two words you are most likely to say after hitting your finger with a hammer" 🤣😂🤣😂
not what I tend to say... but it's a pretty good line anyway
Jesus Christ that line waw funny!
That's like my favorite joke anyone has ever written, so brilliant
...and even after ~2000 years, people still mock Him. That's why He said to His followers and the Apostles:
John 15:18 - _"If the world hates you, you know that it hated Me before it hated you."_ - Jesus
...and yet Jesus took on all your sins, to pay the price each sin, for you, so that you wouldn't have to...because you simply cannot, and so He willingly sacrificed Himself by being crucified, for you. His love for you personally, and the rest of mankind is deeper than we can ever know.
John 15:13 - _"Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends"_ - Jesus
1 Corinthians 1:18 - _For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God._
If you want to ignore, reject, or, even ridicule, what Jesus did for you, then that's on you.
Galatians 6:7 - _"Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap."_
Nobody knows when their time is up - tomorrow is not promised to you.
Ecclesiastes 9:12 - ..._no one knows when their hour will come; as fish are caught in a cruel net, or birds are taken in a snare, so people are trapped by evil times that fall unexpectedly upon them._
John 12:35-36 - _"...Walk while you have the light, lest darkness overtake you; he who walks in darkness does not know where he is going. While you have the light, believe in the light, that you may become sons of light"_ - Jesus
John 8:12 - Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, _“I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life.”_
John 8:31 - _“...If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”_ - Jesus
John 3:16-17 - _"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved."_ - Jesus
You can also say what Maria did, "holly fck".
Diane Morgan has created a classic character. Cunk rules.
It was Charlie Brooker who created the character.
@@Argeaux2iirc I saw them both in an interview and he’d imagined the character with a posh accent, but Morgan did her lines in both a posh accent and her own. And apparently they thought her regular accent was funnier, and went with it. Edit: Here’s the interview-
ruclips.net/video/uZ-5eOD57Ss/видео.htmlsi=MMPkN9YhkYAWAFrI
@@Argeaux2 they should share the credit equally. Brooker created the concept but Diane Morgan brought Cunk to life. Can you imagine anyone else as Cunk?
Brilliant creative collaboration then? 😊@davespanksalot8413
They noth created Cunk.
A man with a sheet over his head like Scooby Doo is the most believable theory I've heard yet.
And I would have believed it too. If it wasn't for those pesky kids.
Agreed
If I've learned anything from Scooby-Doo, it's that the real monsters are middle aged white men in masks.
Can't you see how all the clues are fitting together, Shaggy?
It would explain a lot, that's for sure.
3:36 “…now i’m feeling less happy with him….coming down my chimney”
the pauses just hit the raunchy meter just right.
That's from a risqué Xmas song.
That`s recycling. Heard that one when I was 10. In 1968.
"They all say that, don't they?". "They do". Brilliant.
“Why was he knocking about with these prostitutes”
"Well i dont think he knew them very well"
"Well, well enough to give them gifts"
Caught bro in 4K 🤣
“Caught bro in 4K”? Um… huh??🤷♂️💩🤡🤦♂️
In the bible the words "to know him/her" has a very different meaning to what it means today.
"Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days scoffers, walking after their own lusts," (2 Peter 3:3) The Scriptures being fulfilled before our eyes.
@@MiguelQuienComoEl
That Jesus was walking in his own lust is understandable as he may have been desperate for female 'companions' as most of the text alleges he was with 12 cyclists.
@@VaughanMcCue Galatians 6:7 - _"Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap."_
"Mary had to give birth here on the floor like a crack addict"
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
"Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days scoffers, walking after their own lusts," (2 Peter 3:3) The Scriptures being fulfilled before our eyes.
@@MiguelQuienComoEl Amen 🙏
@@MiguelQuienComoEl Like an crack addict.
Hmm!
I didn't know crack addicts gave birth on the floor in cow dung?
😂🤣
This series was a damn riot. Her deadpan delivery is just the best.
“Why was he knocking about with these prostitutes” 😂😂😂 I can’t
Honestly I was choking on my tea at that part. 😂
You can laugh all you want but I still need an answer.
@@blueabattoir The answer is science and reason. 😇
@@AwibrahorIs it ? It's interesting how science explains nature , yet somehow everything came to be , as scientist say , from nothing .
How did nothing just evolve so creatively into something ? Was there a different something prior to the universe forming that was not organic or physical , yet existed anyway ... An intelligent universe could only have created all that exists - if there was no form of intelligence building the universe , how did everything just randomly come together to establish complex life forms ? Have a think about it . There is a lot more going on that simply can never be explained by mere humans - we've only just arrived ( in universe time )and yet people mock and ridicule those who came before who witnessed events that seem today by some to be just made up fairy tales .
@@shaneb315So it’s easier to believe what people who lived in the Bronze Age (who didn’t know anything outside of their surroundings) than scientists who over the past thousands of years have done actual research on the topic? Did it “randomly come together “ or was it all an evolutionary process that created the universe? Was it a man in the sky with a long beard and a white robe? I’m going to have to trust the scientists who believe in the big bang theory of the creation of the universe rather than people who have a financial stake in “creationism” (religious organizations). Religious belief in the creation of the universe is simplistic because it was written by people from a simpler time.
OMG. Had a coughing fit. "..two words you're most likely to shout after hitting your thumb with a hammer"
Hammuh
Yep - saying those two words as cuss words, means you are playing right into Satan's hands! Why those two words? Does anyone ever stop to think why? Why not, use "Muhammed" as a cuss word, or the name of your mother? When what Jesus did for you was to pay the price for your sins...
John 15:13 - _"Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends"_ - Jesus
...and you repay His deepest act of love for you, by using His name as cuss-words....
Galatians 6:7 - _"Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap."_
@@martinscrapp7166 There ain't no Satan and no Jesus either unless you create one and keep it going. I figured that out in 7th grade. Now be a good little boy and run along.
@@martinscrapp7166 How does one "pay the price for one's sins "? What does that word salad even mean ? If you have been "forgiven" then why do you keep begging for forgiveness ? Also there are no commandments against rape or slavery or domestic violence or drug abuse or alcohol abuse or cannibalism or arson or child abuse or counterfeiting or even fixing horse races. Oh you and I might think they are wrong but your god didn't think enough about them to make a commandment forbidding them. Graven images yes but slavery no. Time to start a new religion, eh ?
@@martinscrapp7166 calm down there officer killjoy
And they do it all with absolutely straight faces! OMG, I just can’t! 😂
Just like mega-church charlatans
You have to wonder how many takes it took, lol
@@Not_that_Brian_Jones I understand that the experts did, in fact, crack up on occasion. Apparently, they just cut those bits out. 😂
@@heatherstubbs6646 🤣
It's called acting, I believe. 😂
Pret a Manger = Ready to Trough. Absolute genius.
For all the good things people say about Jesus, no one ever explains why he let Paul have a massive car crash. If Paul ever ever sees him again, Jesus is a dead man!
I didn't know her mate Paul was in a car crash. That's really too bad.
I don't think Jesus is real then.
Need to explain to Paul that's a steering wheel not a halo
yeah hes gonna die and go to...
hang on a second
@josemaria8177 •I made a vicar cry 😭 once in hospital really unwell,I said “Where was the guy when I needed him ,why Is there war why do kids get Cancer “He opted out told me he did not have the answers left the Hospital crying..Hopefully he went back re read the Bible and figured it out ..I have Epilepsy/27 Fractures and a brain injury be 10 years next year my Mum and Dad always taught me to respect other religions all of them but I was seriously unwell -He asked me if I had any questions I was stuck in a bed with a broken back and pelvis I sure did not want anyone sit there and pray for me or offer to cure me I had a spiritual guy say he would cure all my problems that I knew pray for me daily so in order to stop him harassing other people I wrote the longest list I could find -He should still be working on this list alas he decided due to his Religion he was cured of his Epilepsy could ditch the meds 😵💫…Then 3 Days later had a huge seizure he is ok or was but I sincerely hope he doesn’t decide or get persuaded that he can be cured by the power of prayer no offence to anyone but this woman is a legend !Long Live Mandy !Drs Nurses HCA they saved my life not Jesus Christ I did say that quite a bit plus after my brain injury far worse think of standing on a plug 🔌 never swore before I could only say one word ?My First word was “F--/“Apparently it’s common,other people had the same experience..
Joseph bought that whole "I was impregnated by a ghost" excuse, hook line and sinker...
A favourite of mine, too!
Surely Mary and Joseph were in on it together. They had to make up the story to excuse their premarital test run.
Or Mary's father was powerful in the society that Joseph feared for his life if he didn't go with this story.
Mary: "I hardly felt a thing"
Joseph: "Oh, a little guy!"
- Family Guy
@@mis4nthr0p3 🤣😁🤣
Brilliant! Family Guy is so rude, but very funny - love it
Omg that last exchange/interview at the end, the “off ya go” had me falling outta my chair 🤣🤣🤣🤣☠️
The lady's face as she's realizing that St Nick was just another John.
The most ironic part of jesus being a carpenter is that he was probably hanging on that cross thinking how much better he could have made one.
No. He made the tree too. He was thinking he was dying to save sinners, even ones that would mock Him later! And think it's a joke
Boohoo
@@WorthyistheLambRev1 We all mock until it's weeping and gnashing of teeth. No one's laughing then.
@@WorthyistheLambRev1 😄😄 Come on, you should charge for that type of jokes xD.
As a committed and trying-to-be devout Catholic, I must say I find this very funny and not offensive or blasphemous. Philomena (a good name for a Catholic nun BTW) is an absolute gem and Diane Morgan is an extraordinarily good comedy actress.
Could you give up the superstitious stuff? You will feel better for it and save two mornings each year by staying in bed longer.
Ahh, blasphemy, the original words-can-hurt-me snowflake riposte.
You don't need to publicly declare your favourite sub-category of supernatural nonsense to find it funny btw 🤦🏻😂
@@jools77
According to the gospel of Saint Flatulence The Windy, the good book says.
Here's to a pie in the eye and forsooth my tooth.
@@VaughanMcCue you guys are the worst
@@tehMilkboy
Krakowurst
We need more cool folks like her coming out and spreading the truth. Very informative and eye opening interview. Thanks 🙏
I always pity the people being interviewed, but they amaze me with their composure at the same time.
They are in on it, but they don't know what she's going to say or ask so it still gets a lot of them.
@@CDale-tc3xz I assumed so, but still you know they get these type of questions when being interviewed. Maybe not non-stop, but I do admire how they keep their composure when faced with arrogant ignorance.
@@Chris-ut6eq Oh yeah, they know what is going on but no idea what she's going to ask or say so get caught out lol. Some of the looks she gets are hysterical
I'm sure they just put it down to the "cellphone culture".
I saw this lady's name in my feed and was pretty sure it'd end up being a comedy channel...
I had no idea just how funny it could be 🤣
First time I've ever subscribed to a channel after only one video
I'm not a native English speak, but her stage name sound like a innuendo pun, Fill'in my ...
the first guest just seemed to give up and agree with her
"they all say that don't they"
"they do..."
Jesii got me. Nearly coughed up my communion wafer.
🤣😂
I'm still waiting for Antiques Roadshow - Jerusalem, where someone brings in table/chairs made by Joseph and Jesus. Be a great SNL sketch.
At this point, any time she says “my mate Paul” I automatically start laughing
He's like Mrs. Columbo. Nobody seen either but they're relevant to any topic.
Amazingly good. Entertaining and clever. Thanks for this.
"like a crack addict." Had me on the Floor! 🤣(like a crack addict.)
Unacceptable that the Creator of The Universe couldn't at least have sprung for a Motel 6 or something for the birth of his Son.
Honestly
All the rooms were full, on account of it being Christmas and all
So many laugh out loud bits there. But seeing Jesus whacking Cunk in the head with a plank certainly wasn't on my Bingo card tonight. 🤣🤣🤣
😂 She’s the modern Ali G - with more wit, although, perhaps with less gall: still fantastic - love this 😅 👍
Very true, I hadn't made that connection before but yes, straight talking no fluff no smiles just playing it straight, a modern female D Ali G!
I am a Cohen fan, but *much* more wit!
a brilliant woman i wouldn't dare to argue with
I discovered you today Philomena Cunk, I have been benchwatching you for a couple of hours only, I am now in love and crying non stop cause I laugh too much watching you, what a litteral blessing it is! Like you are an angel that appeared from no where to bring me joy again at last! :D ty so much, you are awesome!
This is the funniest series! Pump up the jam 😂😅
0:39, a man in a sheet, like in Scooby-Do.
Bwahahahahaha, bloody funny girl.
"...walkin' on wine, or helpin' a deaf man see..." 😁
The man who was named after so many thumb bashings.
One possibility....or we could also besmirch his mom.....
I like learning history from this Canada person who is so deeply knowledgable about all the old things and people who did stuff a long time ago like the 1980s - before television.
"...was born with a yellow circle around his head" Love this...
I could not stop laughing! Thank you!
Brilliant! Real person like Garfield, helping a deaf person to see.
Brilliant!, as they say across the pond.
As a Christian, this is undoubtedly the weirdest account of the Nativity and Life of Jesus I've ever seen!
It’s more believable
As an atheist, all accounts of that stuff are weird.
Look down the lens and say that!
@@imcallingjapan2178 Isn't it though! This treats the myth with appropriate humour.
Try Eddie Izzard's version of the Bible and the Inquisition. Also wierd and funny!
Way to Girl! I'm a born-again atheist, and even I'm blushing.
I'm a died-again Christian, and I resent that! (We're all double-zombies, having been killed, risen from the dead and then killed and risen again).
You're delusional
We're in Satan loosed again to deceive! Revelation 20. No excuse for mocking Christ!
None!
FYI. Earth isn't a spinning ball.
And Jesus already returned when he said, THAT generation!
For the destruction of Jerusalem.
There's melted mountains.
Six historians Josephus, Eusibius, Tacticus etc recorded seeing the armies of heaven coming with the clouds in 66 AD.
Nero was the beast.
He returned exactly 40 yrs!
This isn't even the true Israel!
They hid the Millennial Reign of Christ as the Dark Ages!
You lack any common sense if you think it was possible for peasants with donkeys and no electricity or power tools or trains, to build those amazing Castles on cliffs, and Cathedrals, all over the world!
The steeples were for free energy.
Satan was bound a thousand years. They added 700 yrs of fake history! Fact.
Satan was loosed again to deceive Independence Day, 1776.
They began tearing down all the kingdom buildings in the World's Fairs, ridiculous narrative! After painting and defacing them.
No way did horse and buggy people build those million dollar buildings in two years! Just to dynamite them six months later!
Even non Christians are questioning who built the Old World architecture, and why did they destroy it?
Then all the Great Fires in the 1800 s in every major city!
Hundreds!
The narratives for the massive buildings and mansions are absurd!
For a Castle they had to quarry huge rocks, carry them up steep cliffs, cut them precisely, import the marble, the math for all the arches alone were a Carpenter's nightmare! Then carve all the pillars and staircases. Then smelt the gold. An industry by itself! Then paint the ceilings on their backs!
It was the reign of the Saints and Jesus!
Not dark. They flip everything.
There was a mudflood. We can see mudflood windows.
Satan was loosed again to deceive in 1776, Independence Day.
The Statue of Liberty is Lucifer unchained. Look at his feet!
They know Jesus already returned. Everything is a lie!
Including NASA and the globe. Look up all the first "Ladies" and women in history!
Like Barbara Bush, Golda Meir, and the first woman astronomer. Martha Washington. Susan Be Anthony.
Satan is gathering an army to make war against the camp of the Saints, Mount Zion is in the North. The City of the Great King. Northern Lights are the rainbow around God's throne like unto an emerald. Jasper. And Sardonic stone.
The North Pole, hyper Borea, is the center of Flat Earth.
There's a mountain there on old maps.
They put people who remembered the Millennial Reign of Christ, that were left behind, into enormous Buildings and Castles repurposed as mental asylums!
They brainwashed them.
And there were hundreds of orphan trains!
Ppl are asking what could melt bricks?
Armageddon. You can see melted mountains!
Jesus didn't lie.
Secret Societies run the world.
Maps are all wrong!
They will make war against the camp of the Saints.
And God rains fire down on them.
Then it's the Great White Throne Judgment. Satan goes to the lake of fire. And that's the end of him! Where you go is up to you.
It's the New heaven and Earth, and Jesus comes down with the New Jerusalem.
We're in the short season of Satan loosed again to deceive. Rev 20.
You can see the proof!
The old world was a lot more beautiful and advanced and there was a reset. They are lying to you about everything!
Hope you see the Light!
Mock all you want.
It's the truth.
Jason Jack, Sons of Light, JT follows JC, Understanding Conspiracy, even My Lunch Break, non Christian.
The Millennial Reign of Christ already happened!
Philomena is like a cold bucket uf reality check. This was so good.
Wonderful stuff, really funny and somehow near the truth.
Excellent, nearly wet myself with laughter.
"No other than Mr. Jesus Christ" got me really hard. It's like introducing a guest speaker😂
“…which would have set fire to all the hay and pubes…”
“…which must have been hell for Mary to push out.”
Philomena, you have ruined halos for me.
I’ll never be able to look at renaissance paintings without giggling. 🤭🤫
Freaking GENIUS!!!!
The first time I heard "especially since she'd never had anything in or out of her down-below before," I had to pause for two solid minutes until I could breathe again.
oh man, i lol'd at the first line there. xD
I replayed those lines and laughed each time.
Brilliant!
Possibly the best dam history lesson ever! Love cunk❤
no, was about jesus, not dams. what were you watching? 🤣
Where you been all my life!!!
...born Jewish, but converted to carpentry.
I laughed so hard 😂
1:15 in the business, we call this forshadowing.
Philomena, you should be the next Doctor Who companion...
I am so impressed with the will and focus she needs to stay in character while saying the most ridiculous things. The cancel culture scene for example
Blinders are used to avoid the fact they all share a family history, the shortcomings of circumcision & Moses being the world's worst navigator because he traveled with one foot in fantasyland.
The greatest story ever sold
Jesuses or is it Jesii ? 😂😂
When she went on about the irony of Jesus being a carpenter, I thought she'd mention that the bread and butter of carpenters during that time was building crucifixes for the Romans... so I'm a bit disappointed at this missed opportunity.
Slightly less bonkers than the work of fiction it satirizes.
When he overturned the money tables he shouted: "You either buy from Joseph & Sons, Carpenters Inc., or you don't buy tables at all".
I so needed this ❤😂❤
Now the Christmas is Murray.
Thank you algorhythm for showing me this video. I've never heard of Philomena and this was hilarious.
This series needs to exist for hundreds of seasons. Please God, Jesus, Mother Mary or Netflix, bring it back somehow.
OMG !! She should interview Miss Betty Bowers - America's BEST Christian !!
This is beautiful. Thank you for this!!! More please!!!
I'm so glad I clicked on this.
Getting hit in the head with the wood absolutely sent me. I was sure she was standing in front of a green screen. And the sound…
The last bit! She surprised me. she said it.
I'm tickled that i just found your channel. I'll be back.
that's such a brilliant line about Jesus being a Carpenter: "Jesus was named after the two words you're mostly likely to shout after hitting yourself with a hammer."
Brilliant
God damn woman you are too funny 🤣🤣🤣
I love this so much!!! Thank you!
"walking on wine or helping a deaf man see", "he had a magic flaming circle on his head which would have set fire to all the hay and pubes as he came out"
Very funny, very cruel. Well done. You had me for a few minutes. Good work.
THE LAST SCENE, "SAY IT INTO THIS CAMERA" 🤣🤣 I'm dying
"big yellow circle around his head " 😂😂😂😂 oh my .....i can't 😂😂😂
The last lady was brilliant, indeed. I love her so much 😂
Philomenia's version is more plausible than the propaganda spouted by Clergy.
I love it. The truth finally comes out.
Needs more of Technotronic's early-90's dance hit "Pump Up the Jam."
1:07 "Or Garfield!"
The dude who played Spider Man
As a Catholic, this is hilarious.
he thought they needed help getting through medical school and he was very gen indeed
She is just unstoppable.
I love how she uses IRL historians and professors for the interviews. Adds an air of authenticity to the whole Bible story! Cunk is just hilarious!! (Ouch! Just hit my thumb! J#$@$ CH#*&@!)
If "never let them know your next move" was a person, its Philomena.
Literally love this video 😂😂
Thats as valid a description of jesus ive ever heard!😊
Laughing so hard, I'm in tears 🤣😂
This is hilarious!
Ah, brings back memories of Sunday School!
Oh boy here we go...
Loved it. I’m still not sure if I heard enlightningment at the beginning. I’m just going to believe I heard it.
Hilarious and creative.
Clanking chains and going wooo! 😂🤣
“By a man in a sheet, like in Scooby Doo”