When someone is talking about a problem and their partner is listening, I think it’s a natural response to want to try to problem solve. It’s definitely important to communicate honestly and openly as a couple and I like the way this approach was demonstrated
I don't know if it's natural, but I think it's usually a way for the listener to try to escape or avoid the challenging emotions of the speaker. It's easier to think than it is to feel for most people
I'm curious as a training therapist if in real life you take this amount of time to talk to the client and explain the intervention. It's seven minutes total and I personally wouldn't want to take up that much time of my clients' 50-minute session to explain the exercise. Is it because this is a training video or is this how Gottman therapy is performed?
Nope. I wouldn’t explain for that long then expect the client to remember everything. However, since it’s virtual, I would share my screen to give a visual of what’s supposed to happen as a reference. If in person, they would get something written to refer to.
The couple seems very cute so it pains me to say this marriage probably won't last. You will notice that the husband's advice to the wife was "I'll take care of the dog" and the wife's advice to the husband is "do a better job of communicating". He is demonstrating classic codependent behavior. Even if the wife is perfectly OK mentally, his behavior will slowly train his wife to give him things to do and criticize him often.
Seems to be an easy adjustment though. I mean the topic she was most frustrated by was a shared responsibility. The topic of stress to him was sourced entirely outside the relationship from work. She offered for him to talk to her anytime, and lean on her. She was invited to offer solutions. So how else could she have addressed it? No need for couples to break up over every little difference. They were both offering support.
@@ChristianOne I can see your point. But in both issues it seems to be a "husband source of the problem". The husband needs to take care of the dog more and the husband needs to be more communicative. I think longer term that cycle continues. Having been in marriage counseling myself I haven't found it rewarding. Even watching the video here is stomach churning for me. I guess I'm more of an avoidant personality because I don't find discussing issues brings me closer to other people in opposition to what the Gottman's say.
This is really wonderful content. But the music is set so loudly that it hurts my ears unfortunately that I had to stop! I wish the music was not there as I had to stop watching and it stands in the way of your very helpful content!!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
When someone is talking about a problem and their partner is listening, I think it’s a natural response to want to try to problem solve. It’s definitely important to communicate honestly and openly as a couple and I like the way this approach was demonstrated
I don't know if it's natural, but I think it's usually a way for the listener to try to escape or avoid the challenging emotions of the speaker. It's easier to think than it is to feel for most people
Such a sweet couple! So grateful they have been willing to do this for us therapists to grow. 💜
I wish you would create more videos, Kim. Really amazing knowledge you have.
Thank you so much! I hope to do more soon!
I'm curious as a training therapist if in real life you take this amount of time to talk to the client and explain the intervention. It's seven minutes total and I personally wouldn't want to take up that much time of my clients' 50-minute session to explain the exercise. Is it because this is a training video or is this how Gottman therapy is performed?
Nope. I wouldn’t explain for that long then expect the client to remember everything. However, since it’s virtual, I would share my screen to give a visual of what’s supposed to happen as a reference. If in person, they would get something written to refer to.
i recommend father abulu saved my marriage with my wife 💕now we are together again in love and oneness thank you sir 💕I'm grateful
This is also helpful for friends.
Great demo, are these exercises available through Gottman relationship builder?
What if one partner rejects the advice offered?
Therapist volume is low clients volume is lowest , music volume so high
It's so difficult to even hear what's going on
The couple seems very cute so it pains me to say this marriage probably won't last. You will notice that the husband's advice to the wife was "I'll take care of the dog" and the wife's advice to the husband is "do a better job of communicating". He is demonstrating classic codependent behavior. Even if the wife is perfectly OK mentally, his behavior will slowly train his wife to give him things to do and criticize him often.
Seems to be an easy adjustment though. I mean the topic she was most frustrated by was a shared responsibility. The topic of stress to him was sourced entirely outside the relationship from work. She offered for him to talk to her anytime, and lean on her. She was invited to offer solutions. So how else could she have addressed it? No need for couples to break up over every little difference. They were both offering support.
@@ChristianOne I can see your point. But in both issues it seems to be a "husband source of the problem". The husband needs to take care of the dog more and the husband needs to be more communicative. I think longer term that cycle continues.
Having been in marriage counseling myself I haven't found it rewarding. Even watching the video here is stomach churning for me. I guess I'm more of an avoidant personality because I don't find discussing issues brings me closer to other people in opposition to what the Gottman's say.
….
This is really wonderful content. But the music is set so loudly that it hurts my ears unfortunately that I had to stop! I wish the music was not there as I had to stop watching and it stands in the way of your very helpful content!!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Music too loud and their voices whispering, hard to hear. Sorry :(