Narcissists Condition You To NOT Be YOU
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- Опубликовано: 13 сен 2024
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So true, and that’s the sad part of it, you isolate yourself because you feel ashamed that it happens and you can loose trust in other people and hope in life.
I'm right there. Decades of narcissistic abuse from my toxic parents has brought me to the place where I haven't wanted any sort of connection with almost any other human beings because it's so hard to be ok with just being me.
Ditto. I now grow my own food so that I no longer have to shop. I made a yoga square enclosed with okra. My new fav place 💚 I may not re-enter society. ✌️😏
Same here, nice to know I’m not alone. I’m planning on moving out and healing soon.
It is worrisome that even churches allowing narcissists to get married and eventually to become parents when in fact they are emotionally immature...How can abusive people parent so well?
its like every word I felt was bad and wrong and everything I was saying was wrong and I should be embarrassed and apologise
My mother passed away 4 years ago leaving me with the astonishing realization that she was a narcissistic manipulative presence in my life. I'm still in solitude repairing the damage
Get on out there , and live !
On Your Terms.
I used to grocery shop at 3:00 am to avoid being around people. Pretty crazy
dude. that's what I do. I couldn't understand what theee FU** was happening to me because a year into the relationship & my social butterfly self could not even go into the freaking STORE FOR MILK! was with him a decade & i feel like im not in my body still...
It's been insane...learning this in hindsight. & the period of time where there was denial.
Same, it sucks that Covid messed that up 😅
You must be the owner of the one other car in the lot when I go:)
I can relate to the grocery shopping thing. I remember feeling so stressed and anxiety just walking in a Walmart. I'm so blessed to be healed and rid of him.
@@ThingsILove2266You got that right.. 15 years of. Parental alienation , Various Character assassination... This illness will never end. Now, she has stolen my teenage son... Brainwashed and And her instruments stealing my legal documents.. Betrayal and evil.. Do I feel alone?
Exactly. We are living in a narcissistic society, so we people who truly love, must be very aware of it. It is not our fault. Never was.
Omg..yes..true!
Were supposed to be loving. Not abused ,and targeted because we are loving. It's um gross. And pathetic.
Forgot the apostrophe🎉
For me I felt relief, because somehow deep inside I knew it wasn't real. So after the discard I got myself back.
It’s cuz everyone is in on it. They’re like vultures and hyenas.
I actually had a very mean narc say, 'what is it doing outside?'
They didn't see me anywhere because I worked nights and I loved the peace.
It’s terrible.. ex.. fam.. “friends
How do you mean that everyone in on it , just want be sure think I know same here
I have no friends. I don’t work. I haven’t visited family. My mom visiting even gives me anxiety. I had no idea what this was from. I even rid myself of all my social media except RUclips.
Quitting social media is a positive point on your side. In my opinion.
I'm in the same situation as you are.
Take care
Same here.but niss friends and community
Omg that's me to a t. My mom doesn't visit though and I have no siblings no kids so even though isolation is comforting because I literally don't want to deal with anyone and their emotions or their wants or needs. Im struggling to deal with my own right now. But then in the flip side to that it's like my mom hasn't visited in over a year in a half my dad's always been awful and we haven't spoke in over two years and he could careless unless it's one day of the year and thats fwthers day and its only because i akways gave him a card even if homemade and he hasnt gotten one now going into the third year. Coming up and he literally won't think twice the days before or days after but wants to feel pitty when he doesn't get recognition for being a father who literally has never been one my entire life. Literally...my mom and dad have been together since my mom was 14 and he 15 and it said father not stated on my birth certificate until I was 16 and it only was changed then because in highschool it was embarrassing on my transcripts when getting ready to look at colleges and my mom wanted it changed for that and only that. But anyway back to what I was saying.. on the flip side I then feel lonely and unloved and unwanted and the lack of effort on my familys part esp my mothers only reinforces my choice in isolation and im on this vicious cycle
Same!! I think all of us alone isolated recovering from narc family should have a friends club! 😅❤️🥰 I’ll be your long distance friend!! New subby!
I subscribed to a few other gals on this comment section- we all could support each other safely via comments! 💞🌷💜💕❤️
Unfortunately is exactly how I feel to isolated and hide - as I tend to attract toxic people - and I just want peace
I'm THERE right now.....got rid of my Narc back in 2001 and have been ALONE EVER SINCE.....yup.... it's just me and Jesus....😊❤
Me too
Last few were narc. Don't get the lies either.
Alot of narcs out there theese days…..
BREAKING FREE OF ISOLATION, FEELIN FREE❤
I kept Jesus first in my life!!!! I stayed myself and even went higher being with a narcissist husband. Praise be to God who saved my hubbs from narcissism! ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE LORD! Keep praying for your loved one and keep believing in miracles!!!! Amen and amen ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Nonsensical comment! It's just another illusion you fell for. Get back to reality. Thinking Jesus is supernatural is badshit crazy and not what the lack of evidence tells us.
Isolation does feel safe it gives you time to process reflect heal and regain your strength ❤
one thing you have to understand is that there is nothing wrong with isolation just not going overboard with it. You need to isolate in order to go within and do the inner work and heal. Inside is where all the answers are also isolating yourself is how you develop thicker skin from past abandonment issues. Last but not least we all are on our own journeys in life and all have different paths.
Well said. Do what makes you feel right. I love to be alone now and don't want a relationship or rather a relationshit. And I don't feel guilty of my choice.
Everything you said! TRUTH.
All I want us to be left alone and not be around people. I don’t trust them or myself anymore. Another relationship is out of the question. Are you saying we can heal/grow out of this?
Same
Ya even I want to know....
I'm at that point in my life where I don't want to go anywhere...
Leaving my home, my room seems impossible now.
Yes, **crystalization of conscience** is a pathology not a mode of life ... Becoming rigid and reclusive is a failure to *recover*. Resilience is life. Change is life. Constant sameness is stagnation....it's death Before dead. Find your way home.
Healing is the path/journey.
It is extremely painful and I cannot believe that I open my eyes when I went back to school. I think my eyes felt like they were sealed shut, and now they’re wide-open.
Thank you for this video
This brought tears to me eyes… I’m waking up and realising what’s been happening to me from my partner. It’s a hard pill to swallow.
Isnt it what the Narcissist wanted to accomplish in the first place?
Just To Keep you around for when their supply runs short.
Sad..The one who truly cared is the one who get hurt the most.
Crazy as it may sounds.
Thank You for all your support. You are appreciated.
One 🗡🔥🔥❤️⭕️❤️🔥🔥🗡 Love
Agree.
Same!...I truly enjoy been completely alone with my Dear God ❤
I truly believe that God places us in isolation for protection and peace! It took me over a year to slow down enough and notice my existence ... love my quiet 🙏❤️
Taking notes ✍️ I truly understand U / yep ! Isolation feels more like a relief and so much better.....
You have been helpful. They should teach this. The.negation of your truth and minimization of what you went through.
It took me years to realize and understand what a narcissists was and the effects that this relationship had on me. The feeling of not wanting to experience that horrible time again sent me into isolation…Time brought me out of isolation…
So true I'm in my hermit mode. I have isolated myself and don't want to meet people. I can't trust anyone anymore.
Go Michelle! Love your videos, you’ve helped so many people recover! Thank you!
I’m keeping myself completely isolated. I’ve changed so much. I know I need therapy.
This is your therapy listening to these videos. You'll be okay. Take baby steps.
Becoming isolated in the relationship does that. And after is way so hard to get back to social.
Yes.
I was on top of the world when I married a demon- I kicked him out after 7 years. A shell - empty and void. 17 years later I’m finally whole. A better person.
It's so true...
I have isolated myself...
He made me do that....
But I am slowly getting to know and regaining myself back....
When in Narracissitic abuse I was a different Me but learning about narracissim and traits they have made me aware of Me a empath that loves❤
This is so trueeeeee. Thank you for sharing.❤
It's true, but i see the isolation as necessary to relearn who i was, and really get to know the real me without others influence. Then you can explore the real you and learn to really love and appreciate yourself again
Everybody is here for you be strong
Yes!
I isolated myself from toxic ppl around
Thus i love being alone ✅❤
On my 7mos. No contact**
I never regret without them
(Friends for decades)
I can't hold on the Friendship of fake ppl , that feeling of uncomfortable silence😢
It's mind boggling 🤔😢
I'm there now. I plan on figuring out who I am and how to express myself confidentially. Then I'll go out and socialize. Until then, I'm home as much as possible healing. I didn't know it was a good thing, so this is a big relief! Thank you!
Without going into any detail....this is how my life was for me most every single day seriously since I was two or three years old. I can remember as a child running through my back yard. That was the last day I remember the world feeling wonderful. Most of the rest for many years. Then years later the abuser stole all of the family photos( we had so many)...it feels like she erased my life and past much I had blocked out. So by doing this and everything else that had been done... For this sibling and all she had done?? Never never again will she and enablers will ever be allowed back in my life
I feel this. Because you are told everything is wrong with you
This is what I am experiencing at presently. Thank you for sharing this video...
I found that getting a hobby helped me, with me it was collecting plants. Then I started reading books which gave me my me time. Now, I’m taking pottery classes which I love!
I’m just sharing this because I am becoming who I am!
I have done nothing for myself over the last 30 + years.
I am putting me first. I am loving who I am. And I am divorcing that bastard!
I am desperate. I am so anxious. Worried about all the money she essentially stole from me. Her manipulations. Even now after the divorce. I am even getting in trouble at work .. I am so scared at this point. I wake up every morning, totally anxious …
I don’t know what to do anymore !
Please get help..I know the feeling.
Whew, thank you fir putting qirds to what we go through. Words are the hardest to use to describe the aftermath
I finally left 2 weeks ago and have been in isolation since. I think it is more due to the flood of memories I am sorting through and it's causing a rollercoaster of emotions. Trying to understand how the person who made me feel so loved and secure was the same person that was destroying me. Realizing that he was only amazing when I was never holding him accountable and not making any requests of him. But even during those great times where I was feeling loved, he was lying about me to everyone and claiming I was doing stuff I wasn't. I left because I found out all the crazy lies he was saying. I finally know why people were weird towards me. The pain and betrayal is so difficult to deal with and trying to talk to others at this point is difficult. My life the last 2.5 years was a lie. None of it was real. My future i thought i had is gone. I'm lost. Sometimes there is healing in isolation. I know I'm beginning to heal and let go. Someday I'll be me again. It's ok to take time to get there.
I was just at a church event yesterday and I believe truly that some maybe not all the people that I’m interacting with can be good for me and safe people however, it was so hard trying to connect with them. A lot of the time at the event I was mentally not present overthinking and I’m feeling like I was going through the motions of how I’m supposed to respond instead of actually being in the moment. Just feeling supercharged and alert. I felt guilty because I feel like I’m exhausting the people who trying connect with me but can’t because I’m probably coming rude and stand-off ish and they don’t even know why. I must say I am proud of myself for at least stepping outside of my comfort zone and I tried the best that I could 🙏🏾praying for everyone in this forum. I know that I have so much love to give and so do you. Please don’t let what you went through stop you from loving or receiving love💕 Love is Healing! I’m saying to myself as well.
I watch a lot of RUclips videos on this and closely related subjects and I’ll tell you that no other channel offers the heart that you do. Not one. I feel your pain as you inform others of your past. You are believable.
😮😢 feeling it big time
Me too.. I have to remind myself to be me and who cares about the narc.
Oh my goodness.
Shes so beautiful.
Yes, because they take n distory Everything ❤
Exactly! I cannot stand to be around people ANYMORE... When I go shopping, I don't even want someone shopping in the same aisle as me... I wait until they leave, to continue to be able to shop... I feel like I want to snap sometimes! I don't want to talk to anyone or have anyone talk to me! This is me now, but somehow I want to learn to cope differently...
Get a pet.
Thank you for sharing
Yeah yep pretty much the same it’s like saying don’t want what you want don’t need what you need just don’t be an it hint at all it hurts so deep
Dam that's exactly what I'm feeling and going through right this very minute
Ya I have to get out of this before the next narcissist tries to 'save me from myself'
Thank you for sharing...I can relate to your experience❤.
Thank you for sharing this. I can relate. I appreciate you Sistar. 💛💎🌞
I can't stand being around people because it makes feel more alone and misunderstood. They don't care how much pain I've endured and their fakeness reminds me of the narcissistic abuse I endured for over 20+ years.
I understand what you are saying.
Omg Ijust today before this video. I realized that he has been doing this to me for yrs now. Mostly disrespecting boundaries all relationship boundaries. You name it he does it. Including spell work and magic. Pure evilness. Then he will buy me a gift to real me back in. Then turn around and dial a ho. Yew
LOVE you guys for helping me...❤
Yes❤
Sometimes you have to go do that and understand who you are it's hard but you have to go through that
Phase Im in now
Yes, I see that many of my friends with narcissistic experiences cannot have a normal relationship afterwards. They rather stay alone. Although I was never religious and also a guy with minimal traumas. I never felt unworthy and was very successful in life, despite a narcissistic wife. Although if I would have been brieft about it, my life would have been much easier. Thanks.
Going thru it right now. Feels weird. Hope everyone else out there is doing ok ❤
I have never felt so much shame and dread after this experience. Every time I think of him I feel dread, shame, anger, confusion. I lost myself in this relationship. Completely no contact now for a week and it feels strange.
20 years after breaking from my abuser.
I am still alone because I cannot count on my own radar and the fear of being in that place again is so scary for me
I believe I’m dealing with a covert narcissist wife who continuously pushes me away, i*notes my thoughts/feelings, neglects me physically/emotionally, blames me for everything, and accepts no fault. What do I do? We are on our third counselor, the first that I have chosen and the only one who wasn’t her counselor before. She wanted to use her friend as a counselor, but I said no to that. I feel gaslit most of the time.
Don't waste yr time. U can never please an Unpleasable person. My brother was married to a Covert narc- the worst & most manipulative type. Nothing is ever their fault. They will Never apologize. Yre just being used to prop up their false ego. They are incapable of love. See them for who they are right now, not who u want them to be. Don't let the breadcrumbs of kindness (intermittent reinforcement) keep u stuck in the relationship. It tricks yr mind into thinking maybe it can work out & keeps u from moving on. Whenever the narc is nice that's them being fake. When they're mean that's who they really are. Life's too short. There's way better choices out there. Good Luck.
Chose loving yourself ❤❤❤ heal after the abuse
This is how I been feeling
I agree
It's like you lose yourself to them until you find yourself again
God Bless You,,P.K.J.
I was born into a narcissist family married a narcissist and his family for 20 years. Marriage ended thank God he ran away with one of his harem line. I raised our children and kept a home running through 6 days a week work. The narc families kept attacking so I went no contact with the lot! Now I love isolation, I love tranquility, I love chilling out on my own, I visit my daughters and grand kids that I love but then I go back to my space. Most of all my passion 🏊🏻♀️🏊🏻♀️🏊🏻♀️🏊🏻♀️🏊🏻♀️stay away from narcissists their dangerous they would do anything to finish destroy.
i definitely am feeling this
Isolation is the only thing that makes me feel safe but it gets lonely.
YES
Friendless, jobless, wife with full-blown NPD, figured I’d learn boxing to ‘fight’ my way out of this rut…see how it goes🥊
DAY 16 OF MY DISCARD.HAVEN'T SPOKEN TO ANYBODY SINCE EXCEPT MY LANDLORD&THE STORECLERKS.AMAZING HOW THE NARC CAN LOVE YOU ONE DAY&DISCARD YOU THE NEXT!
I am right here now. I live alone in isolation. No relative no relations, no friends, no colleagues . They have all been destroyed by my narcissistic ex. 😂😂😂😂
Doing it right now.
Wow she's beautiful look at those eyes. Gorgeous
Had a traumatic childhood - went through years of a therapist led survivors group with phenomenal results. Married a narc years later and divorced 2 years after that. Have unexplainable panic attacks ever since~ and it’s 2 decades later. I’ve been in talk therapy for all of these years with a therapist. No relief on the panic. None. She’s helped in other ways but do I need to instead be seeing a therapist who is trained in complex ptsd?
How do you break free of “self-isolating” after breaking free from the narcissist and going through recovering from the trauma bond.
I’m having a heck of a time of getting that inner flame to come back “on” about life, being around people who do not get it, and all the gaslighting by people whom bought into my ex-wife’s narcissistic madness.
I do want to move forward; I find the memories of the abuse keep resurfacing when I do not want them to do so. Causes me to self-isolate and to not trust people.
Sucks!
As long as they are around, I will never be free
I love myself 🙌🙌🙌 thank you God 😇😇😇♌️♌️♌️
You are a beautiful woman!
I was never more alone than when I was with my ex wife. She made it us against the world, any issue I had with people she told me to write them off, when I did, she would abandon me too periodically, it destroyed my self worth and made me more reliant on her.
Come to think of it, while with the narc I thought I had GAD - general anxiety disorder. But it was the opposite cuz I was alone while my daughter was in school and just worked part-timeso i couldbe therefor my daughter. But grew to hate him and was glad he was gone a lot but as much as I never lost myself while with the fool, he did cause me subliminal anxiety now that I look back. Should have left him sooner but there's a reason for everything and it's been 8 wonderful years not having to see his scowl, his anger and rage and all the other narc crap. No physical abuse. I wouldn't have taken that. But thanks for sharing a snippet of your story and bless your heart.
I feel so alone isoleted no friends and abuser around me .
🔸️My body started to fall apart, and I no longer liked who i have become. So, I left 3 months ago, and I signed up for 10 acupuncturist sessions, working on my health, and when those sessions were up, I bought another 10 sessions, mostly because I needed to get up, get dressed, and leave the house. I dress nicely too, so it makes me feel good to do that for myself. I'm exercising, and working on mental health as well! 🔸️
That's me feel happy was take control over my own life.
I isolated for almost 2 years, just work and home, my ex narc would drop my children off on the weekends, during my isolation I read a lot, looked myself in the mirror countless times, scrolling my RUclips feed, I seen a Flat Earth video, I watched it, and my life changed...I've been researching for 7 years, if it wasn't for self isolation I would have never increased my knowledge of self.
❤❤I confirm but I let myself out and showed people who I really am and feel ok but es it hurt too many times I needed a break from him hurting me again 😢😢
Oh my goodness. 😭 This is me.
So painful...this ❤️
Truth 🌹
Threes years in solitude with alcohol, my friends disappeared as I pushed them away and / or they got fed up of me not turning up.: one hope my Crohn’s disease has gone
At 49 years old, Im STILL in this stage. I try to go out and get involved with the world, but I get triggered and hurt by others so easily that I withdraw again. After a lifetime of being criticized and not valued by those who are expected to love you, it is easier to isolate to avoid feelings of rejection, unworthiness, and disapproval. They say knowing is half the battle, right? I know it's only a trauma response, so I'm half-way healed? I'll be honest... my little bubble has gotten way too comfortable, but I was born an extrovert... my bubble is lacking.