Battletech/Mechwarrior Lore - Tex Talks Battletech: The Catapult
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- Опубликовано: 2 май 2019
- Tex Talks Battletech is a new series where Tex talks Battletech, Battletech lore, history, and mech combat in the glorious 31st Century. Avast Clanners, its Fightin' time. No guts. No Galaxy.
This time around we're gonna talk about the Catapult, one of the fightiest of the fighties, and potentially one of the most recognizable heavy mechs in Battletech. Thank you all for your love and appreciation, your hard work, and your faith in what we do.
Editing Guru - THE COURTESY FLUSH
/ @thecourtesyflush
MUSICS:
KUMAKIN - / user-738052488
GOAT - / user-168042611-872573264
KELBACH - / kelbach
VERY GOOD OTHER LORE CHANNEL ON BATTLETECH - / @criticalrocket
Quality Kurita Shitposting! www.deviantart.com/ghostbear3...
ALSO OTHER Music: EPIDEMIC SOUND ATTRIBUTION
Production Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound www.epidemicsound.com 
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Tex is cool.
He makes me laff.
I think his voice is manly.
I love you george.
He sounds like Undoomed.
hay Mr ledoux love your voice over work mate
i hope to hear some more storys on Mr fisher on your channel
:)
@@andromanu6516 well, u gey
@@andromanu6516 come on dude you are being out of order
As a wolf clanner, I both despise yet respect this particular brand of inner sphere scum. And when I stave his head in with that Doge Trophy...I want him to know it comes from a place of admiration more than ire.
Burning, hate-filled admiration...
It is noted.
While I am a fellow wolf clanner albeit a newer one I also like this brand of inner sphere scum but I think we should keep him for entertainment while leaving that trophy in his sight as a reminder
And as a member of Clan Ghost-Bear, I'm just glad someone appreciates our Football skills. Seriously, you have any idea how hard it is to find a good game around here? Tex is welcome to join one of our games on the house some day. Drinks and hotdogs are on me, bud. And don't worry about the other guys. If they make a move against you, we will challenge them for ownership of their pants for you.
As a former catapult pilot I can say you are absolutely right on the money on the 'if it fits it works' mindset. In MWO my clan called me crazy for sticking two AC20s in my K2. Said that it couldn't keep up with the pack, I'd be a sitting duck, etc. And yes those points had merit. But you want to know my response to those naysayers? KABOOM THERE GOES YOUR SIDE TORSO YA DIRTY CLANNER!!!
Hah! I thought my MWO clan was the only one to use that variant. We called it the K20=)
As long as you run it as a sniper, I have zero complaints.
@@Seriona1 errrrrr, sniping with AC20s isn't a thing, is it? I don't think it is, but I haven't played Battletech or MWO on a long while.
@@Korraganitar I mean any AC can snipe if given enough cover.
@@Korraganitar*laughs in hunchback*
If the Mad Cat is just a 'roided up Catapult, I don't see how that's anything but a compliment to both platforms.
More like if you crossbreed a catapult with a marauder.
@@razorburn645 almost like it's IS name is a cambo of the tags of both those mechs...
@@razorburn645 Well, that's a complement too, because BPL gave a glowing review of the Marauder too.
Let's be honest the catapult was the original omnimech so the mad cat truly is a decendant.
@@kirbyjohnson8417 Best part is, as far as I can tell, is that you can field a lance of them for the same price, damn near.
"Genetically engineered snu snu" I appreciate that award a bit too much.
rule 1) if it fits, it works
@@joedoe7041 Hell yea brother.
@@BloodoftheStarMoon I honestly didn't expect a reply from a year old comment.
If you get to choose your death, there are worse options...
[ wiggles eyebrows ]
If you’re going to go out go with a smile 😁😂👍🏻
I like that Tex remembers that Clan Ghost Bear won a planet in a football game.
I love Rasselhauge..
@@Deridus His wife may have played in it
@@haroldcarfrey4206 That is one hell of a funny thought. Probably where they met, if I had to guess
American football!
Yeah... his ex wife was the quarterback.
Probably.
That "If I fitz, I Sitz" pic, of a catapult drop-kicking a masakari, in silhouette was the unit badge for my merc unit: Death From Above, which did include a catapult [artimis IV LRM 20 variant], although it was my Black Knight that would dragoon jump masakaris [the sword and erppc with capacitor helped]. To be fair, the so-called Dire wolf shouldn't wear a sheet of cardboard for a hat if it didn't want me to break-dance on its head!
That's awesome!
"Holy Shit it's the Eridani Light Horse Award" - cracked up
I do not get the reference. Not very knowledge of the Battletech universe, despite playing MechCommander since the late nineties.
@@Dracobyte As part of Operation Bulldog and Task force Serpent, Smoke Jaguar got the everliving shit kicked out of them and were basically annihilated as a clan by the SLDF.
Especially by the Eridani Light Horse, who among other things, smacked the fuck outta those filthy Jaguars on Tranquil (Mechwarrior 3, or Trial by Fire if you want an actual canonical source) and smacked them so hard even Clan Wolf was like "Okay yeah fuck those Jaguars they had it comin jesus fuck"
@@dragon5521 Thank you for the explanation!
@@dragon5521
Your profile picture is amazing.
Smoke Jaguars home planet of Huntress in the Kerensky Cluster was annihilated by Task Force Serpent led by the Eridani Light Horse. Everything to do with the warrior caste was outright blasted away.
Clan Wolf would like to thank the Academy
So you got an bogus award by a barbaric spheroid with a sore throat. That does not matter, quiaff.
@@nerdytom6881 Ack. But the Space Mutts love kissing sphereoid ass, aff?
Arf! Arf!
Nerdy Tom go fetch a ball!
@@nerdytom6881 clanner wannabe gonna get his ass dusted when inner sphere mechs roll over you 😂
I'm a catapult pilot and if you can still find the target it's not a big enough missile.
if you put a nuke on it then it's not a catapult it's a metal gear
@@gamingdragon5140 Rex was a prototype catapult.
I prefer "not enough" to "not big enough". its easier to buy srm's, lrm's, and mrm's (or rockets in a pinch); than it is arrow 4 missiles.
@@apathymanthemundane4165 Personally I'm a fan of Deathstrikes.
First 65 ton mech i got in BT, it stayed with me the entire game and i only had 1 problem with it.
Not enough LRMs
John Wayne as Genghis Khan is just like casting Sean Connery as a Russian sub commander...
one ping only...
Mishile drillsh.
Or Sean Connery as an Egyptian pretending to be Spanish in a movie set partly in Scotland, where the Scottish character is played by a French man who doesn’t speak English.
@@pantherjoseph Showoff. :D
Only Sean Connery is cool there too!
Clan Diamond Shark accepts the award, as long as we are allowed to bling it out.
Permission granted! In fact, heres a few tons of bling!
-an "inner sphere mercenary" wearing a leather jacket with a wolf on it
It's a fact that before the Star League, when the Catapult's iconic doors opened it would be armed with old tech wooden catapults inside. Midgets were quite valuable in the militaries of those days, cramming several into each pod to increase the rate of fire. Coolant flushes involved dumping buckets of Gatorade on the midget crew whenever heat exhaustion set in.
Ah the good old days
And in the case of History repeating itself, that was also the plan for Proto-MechWarriors.
34-inch tall testosterone-addled musclebound mini-mutant masochists so enamored with pain and so lacking in regard for their own self-preservation that pissing for distance into the eyes of Elementals is their third-favorite hobby...right behind gibbering across the battlefield while communicating with an unintelligible series of high-pitched giggles, "Affs" and "Negs" whilst killing everything in sight, and carving penises into the "Mechies" leg armor with their micro-lasers.
Each catapult would fire the deadliest weapon of the Battletech universe - MG ammo.
@@datonkallandor8687LOL. The number of times I've lost mechs to MG ammo explosions...
@@KenS1267 also, MG ammo weight...
My dad once told me and I quote:
"If you can't fit a weapon system on a Catapult, you didn't try hard enough."
This is true. I've seen dual Guass Cannons on the Buggers.
Also medium/small laser and heatsink pods 'cos when you expect artillery you get blasted in the face by humungous amounts of radiant DEATH! Oh and they fit so that makes it right :D
mech.nav-alpha.com/#8f18220a_CPLT-K2 you mean like this?
I fit, if memory serves, TWELVE Medium Pulse Lasers on my catapult. Bare minimum armor, lightest engine, and heatsinks in every crit I could in MW4. It was so much fun watching enemy mechs go *POOF!!!* when I was in a river and my heat management was of no importance. *POOF!!!* my friends, *POOF!!!*
@@Deridus Well,this is a PIRATE CONFIGURATION !!!
GET HIM !!!!!
@@Deridus : Poof the magic dragon, lives in the sea...
*Clan Wolf: **_*Laughs at Clan Wolverine's Trophy, as well as their own._**
Also, Catapults are good, but are a bit slow for my tastes. Nothing against it, but I ended losing my Catapults more than I got the Atlas swiss cheesed, and that Walking Target is, Well, a Giant walking target. Give me an Arctic Cheetah any day.
Also, I agree, the Madcat is a Catapult with arms. Same with the Nova Cat, just fatter.
**Runs back to his Arctic Cheetah as he is chased by angry Clanners.**
-Clan Wolf Pilot.
You forgot the arms came from a Marauder, pup.
A bit late, didn't see your comment when I first watched this.
WOLVERINES!!! I'd rather they go down fighting then end up Mary Sue's/Marty Stu's and with serious author bias. That said, I'll still take the Wolves over the Puke Pigeons.
I like my Centurion. Centurion II when
The Battlemaster taught me very young why real tanks don't have six weapons
because the catapult has 60?
Also teaches people Hull mods really need to keep heat considerations in mind. Also probably why the BLG 1D lasted into even the 4th Succession War with no Hollis or Battlemaster factories in Davion Space.
I hear everyone saying the Battlemaster runs hot, but those people swapped the rear lazers forward for a 1/6/R6, and try to use a designated bracketed overlap Brawler/Command Mech/ Assault Scout as an uni range Aplha striking Sniper Assault
Also rip, I get the feeling it will be a very long time until Tex covers the Battlemaster, if he does. Iirc he isnt a big fan and its not up for voting for a while
@Random Platypus with Internet If you play without quirks, and only with intro tech in 3025 sure. With quirks or L2 variants, the Battlemaster is very much a good Light Assault Brawler, or can flex into a very good Ancor for Fast Heavy scout Lances or as the anvil to L2 Lights
@Random Platypus with Internet The Battlemaster is meant to be used by the Commander of an Assault or Heavy Company, or the Battalion/Regiment Commander of any type of Battlemech unit. (The original anime mecha suit that its design was exactly that!) Its presence on the battlefield should mean "VIP on the map", not "max firepower". (The max firepower is what the Battlemaster is directing at the opposition.) It has good armor, a basic weapons loadout that doesn't get in the way of battlefield management while it discourages Medium and Lightmechs bull rushing the command unit, and some non-shooting options that non-RPG settings don't make useful. To keep it competitive in the area of abundant tech toys, get double heat sinks, CASE, better grade armor, pulse lasers for the Rear mounted ones so you can laugh at the Light back-shooters, small lasers instead of MGs if you're not worried about the grunts getting in the way, and accuracy boosting tech to help out the gun buses & rocket sleds the Battlemaster is leading. And if there's a two-seater Battlemaster for the battalion/regimental leader, of course pay for connection to artillery and aerial support.
@@ssjjshawn People who complain about certain Mechs running hot are the guys & gals who hit the dump switch every turn. The concept of choosing targets and weapons to be used each turn seems to be lost on people. But what do I know, I just ran a Warhammer for many years! 😄The Battlemaster's job is to sit back, give orders, sharpshoot primary targets with the PPC, and call in indirect/offboard fire. If enemy battlemechs charge it, it has the close-range firepower of a Warhammer and it can punch too! In pre-Clan days, that was enough to make experienced pilots respect it.
Smoke Jaguar should change their name to Smoked Jaguar...
... sorry
Huntress burned real good though. And every one of the tube-born fuckers deserved it.
I wonder what happened to Damocles...? Oh, right... They smoked Jaguar.
He's not sorry. He's correct
Clan Wolf warrior here, Yes they suck....
@Josh M like those Elementals that decided it was a good idea to go for a stroll in the lava during the second to last mission in MW3...
For anyone unfamiliar with the game... it didn't go well for the Elementals.
>Coyote is part of Tex's list of "mostly good clans...most of the time list
>Omnimech prices drop in celebration for two days
SWEET! I'm going to Discount Dan's!
"One man's trash is another man's stompy boi". This is going to be my life's slogan for now on I think
Could it be said that the Catapult was basically the first concept of an OmniMech? I mean, if you'd take the modability into account and properly militarize that as a concept, you pretty much get an Omnimech. Rather than permanently mount weapons and equipment, you can just switch out the modules. For example, rather than painstakingly reload a missle pod, you just switch the empty one out for a full one (which is basically the concept of the Omnimech).
But for the Catapult it's more like "forced modability" instead of "supported modability". Which isn't necessarily a bad thing!
Catapult by design: A giant pile of LRM pods on legs
Catapult 200 years later: A giant pile of weapon systems attached to a cockpit on legs
Conclusion: *LEG*
I love Tex, He's like a Battletech George Carlin.
He's like a BT Dan Carlin.
@@untransigent8825 Yeah with just a bit more swearing.
RIP George Carilin...
Yup his channel gets no respekt
I want to meet Battletech Andrew Dice Clay now
I'd love to see a video on the King Crab personally. You don't need speed when you have LRM's and custom AC/20's that make an Atlas scared of entering your range. Or, you know, upgrade to U-AC/20s because you have a vehement hatred for life itself.
@Josh M Top heavy just means that you can DFA smaller mechs by falling forward onto them.
Perfect example of Pentagon Wars. Out gunned by a Griffin at range. Can't catch a Panther.
All about that Krab. BRING ON THE KLAMPS!
*Ahem* We here at Space Bell, er I mean ComStar would like to submit our variant of the Venerable and Esteemed King Grab with Gauss Rifles... because speed doesn't matter if you can shoot them before they see you... and we Do *see* You.
Laughs in Marauder named Kyron.
I only just recently (literally 5 days ago) learned about Battletech. I've always known of it's existence since 2014 or so, but I never looked deep into it until now. I love this stuff, it's super cool! I started watching your videos, and learning about these mechs and this universe is awesome.
Hell, I liked it so much almost as quickly as I fell in love with warhammer 10 years ago! I bought the Battletech Beginner box yesterday, and I can't wait to try it out!
God bless and good luck my man
@@theblackpantslegion have you hear of the USA Megabot? That could easily be 3D printed into a Battletech mech.
A warhammer 40k Refugee. Welcomed with Open Arms. What we have here is something True; it's too bad the Early Years were so marred by legal issue. The difference with this community is how "owners" treat the "Property". for one, It's fan-centric & fair
Literally the Mech that got me into Battletech. I was at the hobby store in 198something and saw a a figure of it in a display case, I froze "WTF is that?" History
Good Lord, I could listen to Tex read aloud the Microsoft Terms of Service or the medical information sheet for the latest anti-psychotic drug on the market, and still be enthralled. So it's just icing on the cake that I get to listen to Tex talk Battletech.
He was talking about battletech? I thought it was medieval catapults he was talking about... Suddenly explains the usage of lasers
For a time anyway.
Indeed. Tex is the hot breath of a man, formed within a bardic God essence.
"Bondsmen! Move Freight! Mechwarriors! Don't Die." - Diamondshark Clan Quartermaster Checkers before every operation
They performed most admirably in support role!
(Landing on a World lost to time)
"So, I hear you wanted a Catapult?"
"Yes, we did. Set up the catapult to throw stones at the enemy castle."
"...wut?"
"Just assemble the siege weapon over there. Be thankful that we, the Kingdom of Feudalia, the greatest nation in the universe and true sovereigns of the sacred birthplace of humanity, this world orbiting its twin suns, will not burn you at the stake for claiming to be sent from the heavens!"
(earth shakes)
"A Earthquake! The Gods are angry! Pray to the Gods for mercy! Hurry, foreigners, do the same lest the God strike you down with their-!"
(Catapult crests the ridge)
(Loudspeaker on Catapult bellows out a voice)
"So, boss, you ordered a Catapult? Which 'Mech do I have to delete?"
Somewhere out there, Someone mounted Catapults to a Catapult Cause they had no ammo and probably a large amount of Rocks.
so just a rail gun where you strap metal bands to rocks?
@@vincentmuyo Nope Just Wood Rope and Steel Launching a 90kg Projectile at distances of 300m
@@tanith117 Better yet, a Catapult that fires mini drone Catapults armed with RPGs!
@@tanith117 Somewhere out there is a Catapult with several hundred AK's strapped to it. And a slingshot, cause fuck birds.
"Clan Hell's Horses
genetically modified snu-snu award"
tbh, i see that as a absolute win
Wait, I thought his ex was Ghost Bear, tho...
@@seand.g423 Probably a result of Trial of Possession for some Genetic Snu-Snu bloodline, so....yeah.
@@seand.g423 Well, Hell's Horses created the Elemental Phenotype, so...... yeah.
@@seand.g423 I mean, they are one of the more tolerable clans. Really, Ghost Bear and Hells Horses are good picks for the list since they're among the clans that seem cognizant of the problems with their society.
They may not fix them all the way. But that's what makes them interesting. They're at least trying within their own mental framework.
Admirable, I suppose.
Excuse me Tex, you misspelled Cutiepult.
Also that Steiner scout lance bit is the best thing I've seen in months.
Please no. I spent an entire Living legends match talking about how big the Fafnir's tits would be. Dont and more mechhentai to my suffering
I like your f35 and Bradley overlay combined with the thick sarcasm
*leaves bradley idling* *bradley catches on fire*
Except the people in charge of it actually bothered to patch up the Bradley despite costing them their careers. And the Brad then went on to serve with distinction in Panama, Eastern Europe, Iraq (in both Gulf Wars), and Afghanistan.
@@dubuyajay9964 *Some* Bradleys. Some.
@@theblackpantslegion I still think the entire Colt Series of assault rifles is a better example. I'd rather steal a Kalashnikov from whatever third world army of the week Uncle Sam is facing and use that instead of the overly-sensitive "rifle made by Mattel."
@@dubuyajay9964 this has been disproven to death, the AR15 series of rifles are not overly finnicky compared to their contemporaries, non-existent training and very poor bureaucratic choiced about what powder was going to be used in the ammunition (hint, the wrong fucking kind) and "hey we can save X dollars per gun if we dont chrome line the barrel, this couldnt go wrong!" are mainly to blame about early poor performance.
Just saw your Sarna interview. Gratz you are officially in Sarna!
it humbles me
Okay, so I was booting up Stellaris while listening to this video and when he got to the "name me a weapons system" part at 15:30 , the orchestral score peaked and I officially fell in love with this mech.
Genetically engineered snu snu, hot.
Very
Couldn't agree more.
@@theblackpantslegion I'm getting mixed signals from the stravag that supposedly hates the Clans here.
@Josh M
All the Inner Sphere say Amen
All the Clanners say Seyla
@Josh M Sort of essential to the making more little humans. Except if you're a filthy Clanner.
I loved the Doge award for Clan Wolf. That's bloody fantastic.
Ah, the Catapult. Literally my first and favorite mech. Just needs... More Missiles.
"Because it F**king works, dum dum!" , is quite possibly the greatest line you ever uttered, Tex. Thanks for making me laugh!
Thanks for the something BT related. A real lack of it on RUclips. Not many of us sharing anything BT. Keep it up my man.
Check out Grimdarknarrator he does good work for BT.
Seconded! Grim Dark is pretty awesome. I hate Kurita and the Grim Dark Narrator covered them perfectly... Long live House Steiner!
Yo, StoneWall! Why am I surprised to see *you* here? 🤣
My favorite Catapult variant is a CPLT-C4 armed with two MRM-60's and a pair of medium pulse lasers. It's nothing too amazing but if you have half a brain, a death wish, and lack a fear response, you can run down assualt mechs and beat them to death with this thing.
The Catapult: An Omni-Mech before it was cool.
ive just started watching this channel and am going through all the tex talks, this dude is the best grizzled narrator ever, of all time
16:10 I don't even deny it. What's more awesome than a Catapult? A Catapult with arms! Clantech ftw.
The MDG-1A Rakshasa agrees!
If you need arms then you didn't have enough missiles.
more metal to put missiles in
@@ghoulbuster1 which is exactly what a lot of pilots do anyway
@@39Chevy Longbow?
"Optimal IS fighting distance" HELL YEA!
Binging the Tex talks and not regretting it, Thank you for putting these together Tex!
I remember being being at some electronics trade show and mech assault was among an alpha or beta version - I came over and was all about it at first, I mean a new mech game! Amazing! The dev started going through his spiel and I think he noticed my enthusiasm waning as he mentioned shields and hacking and very fast paced run and gun action...yeah.
wut?
I mean, scout mechs are good for the run and gun thing, and electronic warfare had some presence in the setting (I think, I know Star League did some, not sure after), but those aren't the usual selling points, and energy shields were something Star League couldn't pull off.
My Heart is with the Clans, but i love Tex Anti Clan Rants. Go on with it! You´re the best Tex.
Test Tube Nazi Fuck, but yeah they are great lmao.
@@adamredmayne1326 *YOU HAVE BEEN BANNED*
No but really, the Clans aren't THAT bad.
Clans are my favourite example of a good idea turning real bad.
I don't hate the clans because the made my favorite weapon...
-ER PPC- I mean *MECH MOUNTED RAILGUNS*
@Josh M pffft... at least I wasn't manufactured in some factory with a really short "use-by" date stamped on my forehead ;p
We need a Battletech version of The Pentagon Wars
Dear Christ YES.
I could interest you in something that might be in the same vein. The Matar was attempted by that Amaris dude to make a mech that could fight a whole battalion, it's legs didn't work and it's only appearance I can recall from my sourcebook could be summed up as a turret cosplaying as a battlemech,
@@Firestorm2900 While the Matar has similar a similar background story to the Bradley in The Pentagon Wars, it was less funny and...well involved alot more executions.
@@Maganac1 Ya know, I'll try to find the sourcebook I have, there might be some other goofy prototype in there. It had some other off balls like mentioning the attempted Champion LAM
@@Firestorm2900 Oh yeah, I think that one was in the Boondoggles TRO
Catapults are great! Especially when you put nothing but oodles of medium lasers and heat sinks. Then you get to have a medium pulse laser without all the fuss of being a clanner!
The test sequence at the time the conqueror was filmed was Upshot-Knothole. This included a live fire of an atomic artillery shell. There's a video of the test that has been declassified.
Wait, who beat the Hell's Horses in the Genetically modified snu snu award if they're the runner up?
I wanna assume Ghost Bears, since they field Elementals by the droves.
Clan Stone Lion, which splintered from Hell Horse?
Either the Belters or the Magistocracy of Canopus.
@@Maganac1 Well technically it was Wolf who made the elemental armor and Horse who made the genetic makup.
@@sheilaolfieway1885 I never said otherwise.
Last time I was this early they were still making Catapults
Didn't they come back to Assembly lines post Clan Invasion and Helm Core?
Here's an idea: A video about the "unseen" mecha of Battletech. That is to say, how they came to be, how they came to be unseen, how cannon they can be considered now, and maybe an in universe explanation for why they started looking way different (illustration wise)? Anyway, huge fan. I've been working on my own fan-stuff for Robotech, and have been inspired by your videos to continue with my own fan site, Mecha Journal. (I also used to write for the unofficial Robotech Reference Guide.) So, keep up the great work!
ROFL! "Holy shit it's the Eridani Light horse!" award
Or the "Hippity Hoppity, ELH Isorla Is Now My Property" Award.
Captured a city from the clan in the FASA table top game using a Lance of Catapults and a Lance of locusts as spotters. The Catapults LRM 15s were battlefield levellers in that fight. The clan mechs kept shooting and missing the faster Locusts while getting overheated and pounded from behind a massive forested hill. Losses were light for the inner sphere and we captured two Madcats that had shut down due to overheating. A major boon for the campaign and a clan embarrassment.
The Catapult is simply devine as a tool of warfare.
Sounds like a classic case of, "What do I do if my opponent has perfected warfare? Change the rules on him" XD
@@jonskowitz I used my limited assets tactically. Lost two locusts in the fight, was left with four catapults, two locusts and two captured Madcats. More than a piric victory I'd say. I was lucky with the dice too in the real world. The battle would have been ten minutes of spectacular missile barrages and speedy pot shots. The clan commander (other player) had massed superior firepower but was too gung-ho. "fire everything and jump" was his motto. His two Madcats overheated within the first two minutes of the fight.
They were his best assets. His light and medium mechs were easy targets for LRM 15s.
😁
@@milanondrak5564 sounds like a classic case of overconfidence to me. Well done 👍
You used Catapults to get your hands on Catapults with Arms.
@@CharlesUrban Arms with lasers in them, lasers that do cool stuff and not just read a blue ray disc. (Drooling uncontrollably). 🤤🤤🤤
Why don't the Smoke Jaguars have any barbers?
Because they are so edgy that their hair cuts itself.
They had one, but he was a Jade Falcon freebirth, and he kicked their asses.
Why don’t the Smoke Jaguar know how to grill?
They do, but their grilling involves ORBITAL BOMBARDMENT OF POPULATION CENTERS.
Fuck Smoke Jaguar, they got what they deserved.
That's a dad joke.
Shame...
Only just discovering Battletech and I have pretty much no idea about the background, yet, but this still made me laugh.
@@dannyeccles1894 basically they were one of the original 20 clans of the Pentagon Worlds out past the periphery, they were ruthless in how they fought and had a something of a take no prisoners approach. around 3060 they got crushed badly so they are no longer around....well as a clan anyways. link below for a good read on them if your interested.
and yes i am a clanner
www.sarna.net/wiki/Clan_Smoke_Jaguar#The_Annihilation_of_the_Smoke_Jaguars
CPLT-H2 is the mad cat done right and by that I mean affordable and cost effective, thank you shade tree mech techs
"behold a pale horse and his name that sat on him was catapult"
Jade falcon was not on the list of mostly okay Clans. I'm satisfied.
@@dubuyajay9964 I'm suprised you immediately figured out I'm from clan Wolf. I could have just as well been just another freeborn from the Sphere.
@@silverheart302 The smell of sheer dog crap from huffing your own dog farts was unmistakable, surat.
Clearly a Wolf; the only other Clan that throws so much shade at Clan Jade Falcons are the Steel Vipers. We all remember what happened to Clan Steel Viper right?
@@pmwrd What happens to any snake that fights a genetically engineered bird of prey that excels at hunting snakes?
@@dubuyajay9964 actually a whole bunch of ill tempered Khans, one Tried to assassinate the Illkhan's wife hoping to take her place, the last killed a man with a laser pistol in the council chamber where weapons were weapons were forbidden. He was smacked dead with a ceremonial mask by the star adder Khan before the Steel vipers were annihilated by orbital bombardment
I need Adventures of a Steiner Scout Lance.
0:55 "You seem mad" Best response to a wall of text. 😆
Can confirm. Came across one early in Battletech. Lost a couple mechs, and injured all my pilots while blowing out it's legs, and skipping the c-bills for that sweet salvage.
Worth it!
I Saw MadAsguardian on MWO last night and told him more Tex Talks BT ASAP. He delivers.
Sorry, I was probably too busy trying to avoid imminent murder to catch that. This one was done by an actual, knows-what-they're-doing editor, as opposed to a hobo with a Creative Cloud subscription.
@@MadAsgardian don't sell yourself short You guys are doing a great job on the series keep it up.
I laughed so hard when I saw Clan Wolf aka Shiba Inu! Great Tex Talks video as usual BlackPants ~
I haven't played battletech in 25 years and this took me back. Really happy you make these vids, so entertaining! I hope to see one on the warhammer, (been so long i dont remember why i liked it but i know i did.
I can't get enough of these, their all soooo good
Hell, It's about Damn Time! Thanks Tex, great video as always!
Welcome
*Looks through the list of comments to see if he is there...*
*Is there*
Come at me clanners!
I still have the High Ground!
So coming back to this after a few years, I've learned some things recently.
1. Namely the movie The Pentagon Wars is mostly fictional, dressed up by a luddite who thinks Air Force pilots don't need ejection seats or radar. Or missiles. Like his faction within the Pentagon thought the bees knees was a stripped down variant of the A-10 Warthog without all the unnecessary junk added. Just a titanium bathtub and the GAU-8. While he certainly did force the tests on the army regarding the Bradley Fighting Vehicle, which was always supposed to be an IFV, the Army already knew what the results would be. "We need to see if this can survive the main gun round from a main battle tank." "No we don't. We know it won't survive the main gun round of a main battle tank, it's not designed to do that." So what the charming hero of the movie really did is waste tax dollars proving a point the Army agreed with. "Test interference" as described happened too... soaking down the dummies in the crew compartment with water. Because the point of the test was splintering and shrapnel, and it's really hard to check that shit if everything is a melted pile of slag.
2. While the F-35 program has been a complete clusterfuck, and the method of developing technology over the course of weapons program experimented with it, and the Ford class carriers has been a very costly lesson in how *not* to do stuff. In the case of the aircraft itself, I will offer in it's defense, that;
A. the cost is coming down to relatively affordable levels, and certainly isn't in the ballpark of some of the crazy shit quoted by various outraged media sources clutching their pearls while waving reports they don't actually know how to read.
B. That the American people certainly got what we paid for, and what we paid for is an utterly transcendental weapons system that is straight out of the pages of the wildest kind of science fiction in terms of crazy shit it can do. The performance of the worst of the models in raw performance specs, the Marine Corps B model, was so good at Red Flag at Nellis one year, that the Air Force disinvited the Marine flight from MCAS Yuma and told them to go home. Because the entire exercise on the wrong end of them was crying to mother about getting their asses beat from red to blue to black. Because they'd take off and pretty much immediately get shot down.
I had that story second hand previously, but a co-worker of mine recently confirmed it, she was at that Red Flag with an F-16 squadron. The salt in the ready rooms was palpable. And that was before the full potential of the 35 and it's datalink supporting allied forces was completely realized. You know, if wild shit like a 360 degree missile targeting arc wasn't cool enough for you.
This is not to say Tex is wrong about defense acquisitions, real or fictional, he's entirely correct. But on those two particular examples I found what I learned on the subjects over the last few years really interesting.
"what we paid for is an utterly transcendental weapons system that is straight out of the pages of the wildest kind of science fiction in terms of crazy shit it can do"
In Britain we've been doing this since WWII. We're still the only nation to bounce 10 tonne bombs over torpedo nets. The M1 Abrams uses Chobham armour, developed in Britain in the 50s. And the F-35 is the spiritual successor to the Harrier, developed in the 50s and entering service in the 60s. Never under-estimate the genius of nutters in sheds.
@@chrisbingley I mean... We don't bounce bombs any more. We guide them.
And VTOL tech was revolutionary, but I wouldn't call an entire aircraft a successor just because one variant uses the same technology. Boats use propellers but they're not all successors of some steamboat.
If we want to talk trash though…m14. A .308 that doesn’t have controllability in full auto, and when we got them out of war stock for the GWOT, we had to design a chassis system that’s practically a portable bench rest, just to get the lower end of a decent DMR, and even then it has to be serviced for accuracy if you want it to “stay” that accurate. Just get a SR25 variant, or a ar10, or g3.
Yeah, they act as if the IFV concept is utterly incomprehensible in the movie, when really the concept of uparming a mechanized infantry carrier so that it can move troops and provide fire support was a move that had seen significant success with the Soviet BMP series and European Shutzenpanzer and AMX series IFVs. The movie tries and make us think that they were trying to make an M113 replacement that got bloated when no, it was something different that was supposed to be uparmed and unarmoured to start with.
@@fuschiaknight1991 Right exactly, the Brad was a direct response to the BMP. It's also worth noting that when the Brad and BMP squared off, the Bradley utterly fucking wrecked it's Soviet designed counterparts.
Thank you for the videos they are amazing! Keep up the great work
Just wanted to say that the intro for this particular episode was the best one yet! Mad props to The Courtesy Flush for crafting that masterpiece! Hit the actual narration charged up and ready to talk some Battletech! :D
Yessss! I absolutely adore when you talk Battletech; hilarious and informative.
While at work, I’ve been listening to the Battletech playlist you have made. People are asking if I am alright from all my laughter. Keep up the great work!
MOAR!! love these mech videos.. just found them yesterday and binged them all already.. must.. haz.. moar!! they are hilarious AND informative :D
As an Ex Wolf. I can tell ya, we totes stoled your catty mech and gave it arms
and it does better.
@Josh M indeed and the only downside is it cost more, but when your a clanner I don't think cost matter so much as they don't use C-bills. But when your an innersphere trashy pilot daaamn that's gonna put a dent in your wallet.
Ex? Are you a bondsman?
@@dubuyajay9964 He's probably a warrior in another clan by now.
@Josh M I hate smoke jag and Jade barf Falcon.
02:42. And then he died from filming it at a nuke test site and smoking like a chimney. RIP Duke.
PS: No, I won't put it away for now because I legit admire the Duke.
The catapult is one of my preferred mechs in mw5. It is great for choosing your preferred engagement range. Missiles are primary for sure, but the four medium lasers let you move more into an anti light/anti medium role in a pinch. And the jump jets let you move easily through the battlefield, so you can do overwatch, hit and run, or keep up with faster mediums.
I'm new to both Battletech and your channel, but the inclusion of Hell March at 1:55 alone is enough to earn my upvote.
That you're proving to be a great storyteller so far in terms of informativeness, humor, and actually emphasizing that your opinions are in fact *opinions* is making me wish that I could upvote multiple times.
BTW, you can thank Airier (from AirierGames) for introducing me to your channel.
Same and same and who?
@@Seth9809 www.youtube.com/@Airier
Finally, more Battlemech with Tex.
They take a LOT of time.
@@theblackpantslegion I understand, just happy to see more battletech talk. I won't say that i am a huge fan, but I am wanting to learn more. Also thanks to your playing Battletech let me find out about the game that I now enjoy too.
I know the sound of "Hell March" boots hitting the ground when I hear them.
I fully expected Hells March I to play then.
Please tell me I wasn't the only one that was really anxious for the song to actually start.
Why did I only just now discover these? Tex is friggin rad and reminds me how much I loved this setting back in junior high.
At 7:31 - the demonstration for fire-support. I absolutely loved that animation. I laughed a crapload. That poor Urbie!!
Thanks Tex for another insight into this universe.
Hey, those 60 MGs were for chewing up hardened armor!
@Alaberti insurgent squirrels
The Catapult seems like the ideal mech for a person like me. Indecisive, slightly crazy, and happy to blow something up.
This was a fun! Thanks Tex!
I'm really happy that Tex doesn't slip scathing social commentary into his videos.
In MW4, I liked to take a Catapult and load it with 4 clan LRM20s and an ER large laser because THIS IS MY SQUARE MILE!
The music in the beginning is beautiful, great work brother. Thanks from Clan wolf.
Great video :) Love your work.
I view the catapult with particular awe. My first introduction to battletech was mw2 mercs and those training missions left an impression.
*Jade Falcon Clanner internal screaming at seeing Clan Wolf getting an award (even in jest) intensifies.*
These are the best videos on battletech lore! 👍
Tex, your comment at the end about Smoke Jaguar was classic! Well done!
Oh my lawd the Awards board made me spit coffee... Awesome stuff. Subbed and Liked :D
Yes, the very Military-Industrial Complex that GENERAL/President Ike (whom we all like) warned us about...sad days indeed.
I love how Tex talks ans presents Battletech. I watch every Video over and over. Can't get enough of it.
Ah, such an awesome episode... Thanks Tex!
The awards makes me giggle so much every time. Ever since I started with battletech I was in the beginning so hardcore a clan fan boy. That specified to clan wolf first, then I get older and realize they really are not that awesome (see what I did here) , and drift some more towards Ghost bear Dominion, since they actually looked like they wanted to cooperate with ppl. Just takes them 100 years. Some really cool books on them, but as mechwarrior online comes about I'm more towards the inner sphere , I love me a good steiner scout lance. And now I am sitting here in 2020 and thinking... you know what... Khan McEvedy's what probably the most bad ass chick in the lore. And I really hope there is enough material out there for you to do a Clan Wolverine / Minnesota Tribe lore video one day!
I see the catapult as the perfect arrow IV system
Agreed
Naga??
fearanarchy
This! 86kph with two ArrowIV systems and more arrowIV ammo.
What is not to love?
The 3050 Upgrade of the Catapult actually gave it an Arrow IV system. Though you could also use the O'Bakemono or Bombardier for this kind of artillery
Add a Phoenix Hawk LAM with TAG and you have lots of salvage...
How did i not know this channel before, great job mate 👍
You can tell, from the thumbnail to the music to the writing style, this is where the series skyrocketed in quality.
Kinda makes me wonder what changed at this point. It's almost like someone hit flipped a switch and suddenly there was a huge change for the better.