Hospice is not giving up. It is choosing as many good days with family as possible. It is not lack of treatment. It is just different treatment. And it is for the whole family. Including kids.
I have issues with people thinking not doing a treatment means that a sick person is 'giving up' or 'not fighting'. I really wish that we wouldn't equate 'fighting' with doing a treatment. Acceptance isn't giving up. You all are fighting for Sarah with your love.
I have issues with that as well. Do people really think that?? If they have followed the channel and Sarah's struggles, they should know that she certainly isn't "giving up" This young lady has fought and continues to fight!!
As an RN, I long ago came to realize quality of life is more important than quantity. This is the most loving and selfless decision you could possibly make. She’s surrounded by love from all of you and all of us, and what more could anyone ask for in their last days. Always sending Love, Hugs and 🙏. ♥️
As a hospice nurse, I must say, you explained “why hospice” perfectly. Sarah is in such loving, good care with you, other family/friends and her hospice team❤ She’ll receive amazing end of life care. Call for any reason, concern, question. Doesn’t matter what time of day or night. Don’t hesitate. A nurse will talk you through it or come out in the middle of the night and stay until all is well. You are kind and you made a good choice.
Hey this is not the time or place to start your own personal views. A family is preparing to lose a person who is loved. Children are losing their mother, a man is losing the love of his life. If you cannot be kind get off the comments.
As a retired nurse I understand Josh. Sarah will pass with dignity. No pain, no suffering. My heart breaks for your children. This is going to be difficult for them. But you and Sarah have amazing family. You will help each other get through this. Bless you Josh 🙏🏻❤️
As an ER nurse, I witness things much worse than death every time I work 😔 Hospice is the most loving and kind gift you all could ever give Sarah. I wish you all comfort and peace.
As a critical care nurse, I cannot agree with you more. Beautifully said. Hospice is for comfort after all other medical treatments are exhausted. As hard as it is to say, at some point treatment does not work for stage 4 cancers. Sarah is in good hands all the same where she can go out with love and comfort and peace. I am praying for you and your family, Josh.
Thank you for saying that. I am also a nurse, and have spent time crying because I had to be the one doing all the poking and prodding, because the family wanted to “do everything.” When my whole heart just wanted to make her comfortable, put on some beautiful music and tell them to hold her hand. ❤️
Josh, you do not have to explain to anyone why you all chose to honor Sarah's wishes regarding her quality of life. She has fought so hard, and this is not giving up in no way, shape, or form. The cancer has taken over, anyone who understands cancer (I've lost so many loved ones and family to stage 4 cancers) and what it can do if it's terminal. Please spend as much time as you can with her and your family. It's okay. The ones of us that truly understand will be here waiting for you. If you need to vent, cry, laugh, and love, we are here for you all! Sending love to Sarah and family ❤️ 🫂
I know where you are coming from I have walked In your shoes and I feel the pain you and your family have in making the choice of respecting Sarah wishes. It is torture for you to let her go but you ar showing Sarah you are kind and have made the best choice which is torture for you and the family. Tell Sarah her words BE KIND AND MAKE GOOD CHOICES WILL FOREVER BE IN OUR MINDS I will never forget her and how her strength she has had the last6 yrs. 😢😢
May the road rise up to meet you. May the wind be always at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face; the rains fall soft upon your fields and until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of His hand Sarah. This traditional Irish blessing which is an ancient Celtic prayer comes with much love and prayers from Ireland.
The only ones who can make this decision is YA'LL. There is no explanation needed. All we are here to do is support in PRAYER and LOVE! And that, we shall continue to do. ❤️🙏❤️
Hospice is comfort care. When comfort is needed. It’s not about fighting or giving up. It is a gift for the person who is sick and for the family who cannot make her better. When the treatment causes anguish, what good is it? She has trusted you both to “make good choices” for her and you are honoring her wishes. I’m praying for all of you. When I was sitting with my mom while she was actively dying, in the middle of the night a voice came into my head and it said “there is only love.” And this is true, there IS only love. And it is love that makes you know what to do. Sarah will continue loving you all, just from another plane. You will see her again. God bless you.
@@pogfam How much time have they given her until she passes? Of course that's NOT written in stone, it's the individual person. Some pass quicker than they say, some pass later. I hope for a painless as possible, stress free as possible passing. Cancer, Parkinson's which is what I have and numerous other diseases are very cruel. With animal medicine we are taught to end their suffering with 1 single injection whereas we are forcing people to die at the terms of their disease, not on their terms.
No matter what anyone says, choosing hospice is not giving up. It is supporting Sarah’s need for comfort and peace. It is allowing yourself and the family to spend time with her without watching her suffer.
As someone who has survived cancer, I am so so very proud of you and Sarah's family for making this choice to honor her life. I was extremely clear with my kids--when life is only extended. but there is no quality in the extension, all treatment stops immediately. 'Fighting cancer' isn't black and white. I feel it is better to say, 'fighting for quality of life'. Proud of you.
If you have stage 4 cancer you really can’t fight it because currently we don’t have the treatments available to fight stage 4 cancer properly. So what you’re fighting for is a little more time but not the cancer because as of today stage 4 cancer will win. Therefore it’s no fight.
@markm4623 but you can still have quality of life for an extended period of time with treatment BUT when it gets to the point that treatment will cause more harm than good its time to have compassion and have as many good days with your family on hospice
Good days on hospice? Seriously? I’ve seen many in family in hospice and what I saw wasn’t good days. It was them becoming a baby again, unable to feed themselves, bathe themselves, or pee or poop. That’s why I advocate for the choice of euthanasia. That choice should be on the table and it’s not currently
@@madelainemadelaine2934 Death is natural yes but murder is not only unnatural but it is illegal. If any regular person were to do what many hospice nurses do to our most vulnerable under the guise of 'relieving pain' , they'd be on trial for murder or at the very least, be facing manslaughter charges. The fact is, while not every single person is forced into hospice, the majority of them are either not given informed consent or are straight up in hospice against their will. Now again, this isn't EVERY case but it is the majority of cases. There have been many cases of murder in these hospice centers and many family members deceived into placing their loved ones into the care of Hospice have been speaking out and telling their stories. Our most vulnerable are at risk and while some people may willingly choose hospice/palliative care (that is their choice and I respect that wholeheartedly), most people do not and this is what bothers me the most!
Very well said, my son in law passed from stage 4 lung cancer this last spring. It wasn’t the cancer that got him, it was a procedure to help him breathe easier. While in surgery, something didn’t go right. He passed very quickly, we wasn’t able to get the time, some cancer patients get, but he fought hard for two years. I am proud of all the cancer patients, I started following cancer patients and their families over two years ago, when we found out. Cancer is not black & white, and it’s very cruel. And for everyone who knows how hard it is, thank you, for your fight. Maybe some day, we will have a cure for all cancer. I think, I started originally following cancer patients, to know what to expect in our battle. But no two cases the same, there is no rule book, just be grateful for every minute we have them. My heart aches for each and every family I am following.
My husband died 4 months ago. He was under hospice. They were wonderful, so caring & supportive. They kept him comfortable and supported. No pain at the end. I never could have managed alone. I am so grateful for them. I have maintained a close friendship with one of the nurses. Such a blessing!!!
This is not about me, but I want you to know that I have fought mental illness, medication-resistant depression and anxiety for many years. I was sitting in my therapist office this morning and I talked to her about Sarah. I told her that Sarah’s wish was for us to be kind and make good choices. I realize that although depression is not a choice, I am blessed to be able to make choices for myself. I am bound and determined to do a better job in my life to make good choices for myself and others. Again not about me, but about the difference Sarah has made for all of us to witness her strength and courage. Thank you for your willingness to share Sarah with us. 🙏🏻
You are so right. Having been a nurse for 30 years and being with so many people at the end, I can say that accepting that death is coming is NOT giving up… it is moving on to the next step. Allowing someone that you love to go with peace and dignity truly is selfless and definitely “a good choice.” I am praying for peace for you all.
I was first diagnosed with cancer in 1999, and again in 2019. I’m in remission right now, but all of us cancer patients know cancer can rear it’s ugly head again at any time. I hope, if that happens, and the time for intervention is past, my husband can make this same choice. At some point, chemo, immunotherapy, etc. just causes more suffering and hospice is a blessing. It is in NO WAY giving up. It’s supporting the patient and the family during transition and controlling the pain that comes with this disease. NOBODY who hasn’t had cancer (or supported a loved one with cancer) can understand. It’s NOT giving up….❤️
You said it right. They are "being kind and making good choices" as Sarah's always advised them and us. She deserves this time to be surrounded with love....❤❤❤❤
@@winniethepoohandeeyore2exactly. When my sister was going through treatment for metastatic breast cancer, we knew exactly what her wishes were. Fortunately, she lived in California and they have death with dignity, so we never had to make the decision for her. She decided when she was done.
Hospice is not giving up! It is gaining quality of life. She’ll die with dignity, no pain and not suffering! I’m so glad you are honoring her life and loving her as you have always had. You both and your family are in my prayers. I’m a death doula and chaplain hospice and if there is something I’ve learn is that “you can’t fix but you can love” and that is exactly what you are doing. 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🌟🌟🌟🌟
Hospice today is very different from hospice years ago. It no longer means that death is imminent. It's wonderfully supportive for whatever time is left, both for the patient and her loved ones. Our experience when my sister was dying from her cancer was one of the most beautiful experiences of my life. Death cannot be held back forever. Bless you, Sarah, and all those who love you.
This is an extremely difficult time for the family. A justification for a hospice decision is a private family matter; no justification to anyone is needed.
My mother died at hospice. And as weird as it sounds, I will always look back at it with gratitude. Trained and professional staff at hand at all hours, pain relief, but primarily all focus on HER. Things had been complicated on numerous levels, not involving her illness, but at hospice staff took over with making decision with HER best interest at heart. She was dying, nothing was going to stop that, so comfort care and pain relief.
How you even have the strength to do videos is beyond me. Thankyou. Though please spend time with your family. We will all be here in the future. Bless Sarah. We are all praying for you to get through this as well as you can.
My mom is in hospice too. She can’t talk but she isn’t in pain. I am so sorry. This all happened so fast. She spread so much awareness about melanoma, and you guys are so kind that you share your story.
Wishing you strength through this tough time with your mom. I went through that with my dad 33 years ago (lung cancer) and I am still very thankful for hospice and all they did for our family, to help care for him and support us all through his dying process. It was a sad time, but also a privilege! I can honestly say it was a relief, for him AND for us, when he got to celebrate his "new birthday". You are a loving daughter to do this for your mom's sake. God bless!!❤
@@melanieredfield9736 my mom has a rare brain disease and every now and then becomes aware of what’s going on and starts crying, it’s heartbreaking! We try to keep her happy and distracted most of the time by just smiling at her and telling her we love her.
@@Goldenretriever-k8m those moments are hard. When my dad was still hospitalized, before being sent home with hospice care, I noticed he never asked even once about test results, diagnosis, etc...very unlike him. Several days later, he said "they told me I have cancer." So I asked him if he knew what kind and where, and he said "no." I asked him if he wanted to know that, and he said "yes", so I told him. It went like that throughout his illness. He seemed shocked & worried that hospice was involved and I know he understood that meant he was terminal, but we only discussed to the extent that he asked bc it seemed like he really wasn't prepared to hear it, and I didn't want to force matters if he hadn't come to terms with things just yet. I wondered if he was even grasping it entirely, and felt like we should talk more openly so we could give each other emotional support...but how do you open that conversation???? Luckily, I found out that the hospice chaplain was able to do that. He discussed his concerns & regrets, his hopes for his family, and his fear of what dying would be like. The chaplain was so great....he actually got on a flight from Florida to California, to go talk to my brother-in-law on my dad's behalf because they'd had some strain in their relationship, and my dad wanted a sense of reconciliation & closure before he died. I was very grateful to this pastor for being there for my dad in ways that he needed, but felt would be too painful for my mom & my sister & me. If you aren't sure how to comfort your mom when she cries, ask hospice to send their chaplain to talk with her. Even if she can't verbalize her thoughts, they are wonderfully compassionate & able to help with each of your emotional and spiritual needs, not just physical pain. I hope that helps.
Josh, You have made the right decision for Sarah and I have so much respect for you. This is probably the hardest thing you will ever go through in life and we are all here to support you and Sarah. ❤️🙏
Nobody can ever question you about your decisions with Sarah. You can only take this dreadful inness one moment to the next. I know what my beloved daughter went through.
You are such a lovely man .. I’m sure You are making all the best decisions you can for Sarah . This must be such a very difficult time for you and your little family . I wouldn’t want to suffer either . Surrounding her with love is what she needs , you are so right on there . Thinking of you all . X x x x
I have been on this road with several friends . No one should ever question those decisions. Watching someone you love go through this is indescribable. Much love to our POG family and to you Beverlywilson.
Sarah fought with everything she had. And you stood right by her and fought along with her. It’s time for Sarah to live in peace and enjoy the live that surrounds her. This wasn’t an easy choice. We all know that. But it was the most loving choice. The kindest and most sensible choice. God bless you all.
I’m with a Hospice and am silently thanking God that you came to that decision. It was obvious the cancer was at a point of no return and fighting it was just more pain and misery with the same result as stopping treatment. Hospice is not giving up because it is giving hope for final days that are pain free, in comfort, lucid moments with family around sharing memories and no more suffering. There are no intrusive treatments with Hospice, not even needles. Pain meds will be administered under the tongue via a small syringe and will be absorbed into her system immediately from there. I would not try and feed her anymore or even give drinks. The nurse will have swabs to keep her lips and mouth wet and will leave with some. However food and drink will cause her to vomit and that is miserable. That part of the body has shut down and does not need food or want it. Digestion, believe it or not takes up a tremendous amount of energy as it is a process which starts at the mouth and continues until the elimination of waste. The body instinctively shuts down that process at this point and there is no hunger felt by the patient. The body wants to use that energy to keep important essential organs for life, like the heart and lungs, still working. It’s the body’s way of staying alive as long as possible. Feeding a person now or giving drink interferes with that process only causes vomiting or the aspiration of food into lungs as swallowing is not easy and then she would be dealing with aspiration pneumonia. Food could cause a bowel obstruction as well as digestion has basically shut down. She feels no hunger so just concentrate on comfort needs and keeping lips and mouth swabbed. Your hospice nurse will explain all that. I know someone will always be with her and since hearing is the last sense to leave us be careful of what is said in her presence. You have been helping her fight this battle so beautifully and dutifully all along. Now it’s time to continue that at a sadder time but it can be the best you have done for her yet. Sometimes patients are so comfortable with this care that they live longer and even have a little rally. God bless you all. I fully understand this time and Hospice is the greatest gift you can give her now.
Hospice isn’t the greatest gift. It’s just the only option the law gives them. Euthanasia is the greatest gift. What hospice does is force people to slowly die, basically becoming a baby again not even able to control their own bodily functions. Other adults will be bathing you, changing your diapers or cleaning you up. Why put people through that? Maybe because the hospice industry makes a lot $$$?
My heart is pouring Love to you. I lost my 39 year old son to colon cancer last year. Hardest time ever, everything you are saying is absolutely correct. Honoring your loved one is the most important thing. I purchased Sarah’s book with the family tree, i will treasure it!. I use it to write to my son. Love to your family ❤❤
I don’t think anyone was questioning the decision, but rather why the sudden change in the decision out of curiosity. He explained it well here, although he didn’t have to. 💚
Dear Josh, arranging hospice for Sarah right now is the most profound act of love ❤️ She now can finally rest and be loved. She would be so thankful to you and her sister for making the right choice. Because I truly believe there is a point where treatment is no longer helpful, but this is. It’s hard to know we won’t see her anymore. Please give her a huge hug and lots of kisses. And thank you for this update. I’m always so glad to hear from you. Love you all so much and thinking of you.❤
Hospice is so totally the right choice. To have someone you love suffer needlessly and keep on treating would be cruel. You all now have the time to solely. show your love to Sarah till the time she decides to go. And no more pain. Love to Sarah and her valiant fight against this disease. 😢❤ Love you all
My grandpa passed away due to stage 4 cancer a few years back. It went to his lungs, liver, kidneys and brain. Once it gets to the brain there's only so much that can be done. The doctor gave him 4-6 months to live; he only made it to 3. The radiation treatment was getting torturous and it was decided to go the hospice route. I understand and respect your decision. Best wishes to you, Sarah and your kids and family
This is not a battle. It’s not about beating this, or losing. This is truly a journey, walked in love & light. You are all so strong, and so loving. ❤❤❤
Oh Josh, you delivered this message so humbling and acceptance brings peace, we totally understand and as you say Sarah will never be forgotten, she and you have taught so many how to be kind and make good choices, we appreciate you sharing this with us and giving you and Sarah huge hugs. Stay blessed 💜💙💜💙
Hospice IS choosing life and mercy. And my prayer for Sarah and you all is that when God chooses to embrace Sarah and bring her to her heavenly home to be with Him, that all are filled with peace of knowing that you did EVERYTHING you could and will, when the time comes, gently hand her over into God’s loving arms. Blessings
My husband died over 15 years ago from melanoma. It went to his lungs. But it progressed so fast from being diagnosed in July to passing away in November. It is a terrible disease and they have had many improvements in treatment since he passed but still not enough. My heart aches for you and your family. God Bless. 🙏🏻
I am so sorry to hear that but you are not giving up but you are what Sarah wants and her wishes its touch my heart and my heart goes out you and family and friends god bless you and family
Sarah is not giving up, my goodness she would love to see her kids grow up, it comes down to suffering and dignity, which hospice addresses , many people live quite awhile on hospice, and yes they are there for the full family, which will in long run help Josh and the children.There are so many good reasons hospice is so good for people in need of help with dying process , comfort, more quality not quantity, if meds don’t work hospice is just a call away to help.They assist in helping family get supplies needed.Hospice is for living while your dying.Sarah’s family know what’s best for Sarah.Thank you for update Josh, your the best.❤️❤️❤️
THIS is a husband. Watching the love of his life just melting away day by day, staying by her side and doing what he can to bring peace to her heart. Hats off to you sir, even though I'm sure you'd much rather have your wife in good condition than any sort of praise you may get from outside. I feel for you and your family, and I hope her final days will be filled with nothing but comfort, love, and warmth.
Josh, Sarah is YOUR wife and YOUR family. So now you are being kind and making good choices for her and your family. She knows you all love her and will always do the right thing for her. Please remember, we are all here for you. Much love to Sarah, you and your entire family. ❤
I am the mother of a 25 year old son that had mucosal melanoma. I understand each step that you have been through. Once it gets into the brain it’s so much more aggressive than before. I’m so proud of each step that you have been walking with your beautiful wife. I’m still praying for Sarah and you and the kids too. May God keep you and bless you.
I lost my older sister, a former nurse, to colon cancer 2 years ago. She chose hospice instead of pain when she understood her choices. I miss her but totally agreed.
Josh, I really know what you going through. My daughter made the decision to stop treatment 6 months before her passing. She chose quality over quantity. For me as a mother, it was very hard and painful to accept but I respected her decision and we enjoyed the time that was left. It’s very difficult to accept the reality but on the end of the day Sarah’s wishes are the most important. She deserves to be pain and suffering free after putting a six year continues fight.She deserves to spend time with her family without side effects of chemo or immunotherapy.I think you and your family are doing amazing job,making sure that Sarah is surrounded by love. You are all are in my prayers and thoughts ❤
Nobody should be asking you why you're making these decisions, it's such a personal choice and we all know how much you love her and it's nobody business but you and your family's so just know we support you and are here as much as we can be for all of you.
Josh, you and Sarah’s sister made the right choice as hard, as painful as it was to make. I’m fortunate to have my mother who’s a palliative care/hospice RN and she said she felt Sarah’s body wouldn’t cope with the immunotherapy because Sarah couldn’t have immunotherapy without being on steroids and her brain needs the steroids. It’s a double edge sword - a cruel cancer type 😞. Sarah is like an angel that is only on loan, but I know I learnt a lot from her. I hope you are caring for yourself, Josh. I hope the children are coping. You’re a wonderful husband and father. Don’t ever think otherwise. Lots of love to Sarah, you, the children and the entire family. ❤️❤️❤️❤️ xx
Hospice Nurse Julie has a wonderful channel talking about death, what hospice care can and can’t do, the visible process of dying and in a calm, easy way to know what to expect.
I’m a nurse I understand everything you are saying sometimes emotionality outweighs physical treatments because you are at the point where continuing treatment isn’t going to save her and giving her unconditional love is more important im sure none of this is easy it’s heartbreaking for you all sending you all my love I just hope her suffering isn’t too long she deserves to be free to fly xxxx
Hi Josh, I am going through my own battle with cancer, and the hospice route is looming large for me. Most of my treatment paths end with palliative care. I fully respect the decision that you have collectively reached. Hospice is the kindest route at the point you find yourself. Please give Sarah a hug from me. Paul.
My mom had one treatment of chemo. She had a super rare form of cancer, but it had already spread. As it spread more my mom begged for death due to the pain and suffering. Thankfully she got a blood clot in her lung that took her instead of her just laying in pain even with high doses of pain meds. Unfortunately at the time dying with dignity was not a choice. It is now, and I know she would have taken that route. Cancer is cruel. I hope Sarah finds her peaceful out.
The 'treatment' options for Cancer are the most cruel!! Notice how chemo/radiation seems to succeed in destroying many things (mostly good things within your body. i.e ones immune function is just one example), but rarely (if ever) does chemo or radiation fully succeed in eradicating the Cancer itself.
How Kind you are, during this excruciatingly painful time, to make a video giving your reasons for the Choice you have made. You do not owe anyone an explanation but being the loving people you are you honored us with your time away from Sarah. I will live the rest of my days honoring Sarah's motto. 😢
Hospice helps the whole family! It doesn’t mean she’ll die right away. Hospice makes it so much easier for the whole family. I promise. ❤🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️
How is this a good thing? I’ve seen loved ones in hospice. They die a humiliating death in my opinion. They lose all dignity. They can’t even bathe themselves, pee or poop on their own. You think this is easier on the family? To watch your loved one become like this day by day? For me, if I knew I was going to die, I’d choose euthanasia over dying a death like that.
Sarah probably had tears of relief. Especially when you have children, you do everything possible to stick around for everyone no matter what. She probably needed to hear that it’s ok to rest, stop fighting so hard. You made one of the hardest but most compassionate decisions for Sarah, and she definitely knows that. Sending hugs and loving thoughts your way!!❤
People are so death phobic. We are all going to die. Making bad treatment choices that actually hurt the sufferer is not a dignified way to die. Also, accepting the inevitability of death is not 'giving up.' It is a radical and brave acceptance. I absolutely salute you and your decisions. We need to let our loved ones die with dignity. Thank you ❤.
The hardest decision I made for my very sick husband of 52 years as he was facing certain death …..was to let him leave treatment, hospital visits and physical suffering behind and be surrounded with love until the end. I have never regretted letting go, though I miss him so much! I do not see OUR decision as anything but selfless and KIND.
I understand the need for Hospice, do what is best for Sarah and your family, im praying for you and the family. Yes give her her choices and just love on her everyday is a blessing to have her.
Wise decision in this nightmare world you find yourself in. Sarah has done her best but the body can only cope with so much pain. It is time for Sarah to be loved. This ‘fighting’ talk that always comes into the equation when someone is going through cancer is unfair. No one knows the suffering that cancer victims have to endure. I have had this experience with my daughter. Your decision was based on true love for Sarah and we all agree with you. In sickness and in health. His bless you all🙏💚
Giving up, stopping the fight? People really had the nerve to say that?! I am incensed! Sarah is a warrior. Sarah has fought for any treatment that could help even if just a little! She deserves more respect than that. Sadly Sarah is in the process of dying. She deserves all of comfort as she goes through the process. And hospice provides support to her warrior family who has been in the trenches every step of the way. They all deserve to choose comfort and support now as they all move through this impossible time. I am so sorry. Sarah is a ray of light. She has given us the biggest, bravest gift through these videos that will be here as well as the impact she has made on so many people. I am grateful that.
Hospice is a beautiful place! Its Gods waiting room its whatever you want it to be, Sarah will be well looked after and kept pain free(im speaking from personal experience,as much as it cuts you deep inside your heart its the kindest thing you can do for her Bless you all huge hugs from Tracey in Scotland ❤
Josh, you and your family made the right decision because you selflessly based that decision on reality and what is best for Sarah, and that was done out of love. Cancer won’t win . Even if it takes her physically, her light will continue to shine forever, and the cord of love that connects you and Sarah can never be broken. May God Bless you all and grant you peace in your soul. 🙏
Aawww don't feel guilty...this is the kindest thing you can do. My mom died 50 years ago this year and no, she is not forgotten. And I also remember 10 years old seeing her laid out and the peace on her face and I was happy she wasn't in pain any more and looked at peace
Hospice will make her comfortable and help her get through this rough time. No one deserves to be in more pain than needed. She's here, love her, laugh with her, cry with her, and just hold on tight to al the loving memories! Sending much love and prayers to this beautiful family!🙏❤
When a patient decides to stop treatment, it is NOT giving up. I am so glad that Sarah is home with all of you where she wants to be and that she is being surrounded by love as she readies for the next phase of her journey. I was a hospice nurse and have been with many patients during the dying process. You are giving her the one of the most sincere gifts you can offer. I wish Sarah a peaceful and pain-free death, surrounded by all who love her. Wishing you peace.
In what turned out to be my husband’s final few days I asked the surgeon to tell me what he would do were my husband his father. He said that he would let nature take its course and not try a second kidney cancer surgery that had gone to his brain. It’s been fourteen years, but to this day I know we made the kindest decision we could to let him go in peace. The immunotherapy was brutal and the minute it had to be paused for anything, the cancer roared back. God Bless - far too many young folks developing cancer right now.
My husband was in end stage liver disease and I used to fuss at him for not eating and what I didn't realize was it was his body shutting down and he just couldn't tolerate food anymore. I selfishly didn't like seeing him drying up and getting down to 90something pounds. I was thinking he needed the nutrition to get better but there comes a point where they aren't going to get any better and realizing that can be very painful. He never made it to hospice, a sudden massive stroke took him before he was hospice bound. I thank God he did go suddenly, without pain, in his sleep.
My mother was diagnosed with squamous cell carcinoma four years ago after many years of lichen planus in her mouth. She did radiation, chemo and immunotherapy and surgery, but eventually the cancer continued to spread. Her doctors recommended hospice, if she was agreeable to it, and she was. My dad passed away almost exactly 10 years ago after multiple chronic conditions worsened at once, and he developed dementia. He was only on hospice for 2 days, at a standalone hospice facility, before he passed, but he smiled and joked with the ambulance and hospice staff, drank a Coke, and said he was happy before he drifted off to sleep for the last time. My mom chose home hospice for herself, and it was a blessing to her and my family that lived nearby who were caring for her). She said so every time we spoke. She died at the end of June after 3 weeks of compassionate care from hospice staff, comfortable and at peace. I know this is hard for all of you, but you are making the best decision for Sarah and for all of you. ❤
Continuing treatment is just prolonging Sarah’s suffering and only slightly delaying the inevitable. It’s a merciful choice to let Sarah be comfortable in her own home and surrounded by those who love her the most. Prayers for you all at this difficult time. ❤
Sounds like the same thing that Jenny Apple went through when she tried immunotherapy. Horrible reaction. Your devotion to your dear Sarah radiates from you. Thanks for the video and hugs to you all. ❤❤❤
Sarah isn't giving up. She's giving cancer the middle finger and telling it that it can't have her body anymore ♥♥♥ All my prayers and love are with you all. Hug Sarah for all of us.
I have cancer all over and I have decided to let life take it's course. I want to see as much beauty in the world as I can and not be sick when I have no support system. 0 people I'm just ready to go happy and peacefully. God bless your family
I live in the skin cancer capitale of the world QUEENSLAND. MY hubby just had a Melanoma off his face. One doctor had said it was ok, Now I worry constantly. ❤❤❤❤
Surrender is the ultimate act of courage. When my Mom went into hospice it really helped the family accept she was dying. We accepted that there is a quietness and a beauty to allow nature to take its course. Everything we’ve done before they was unnatural and it bought time but at an expense. Now is the time to just shower her and each other with love. ❤
Perfect choice. Hospice is treatment. Keeping her comfortable and allowing all of you to be with her at home is the best treatment for all of you. Hugs and love to all of you
You guys have been so gracious to take us on this journey with you all. It's really sad to me that you also feel like you have to explain why hospice. Don't let people question your decision's or make you feel like you owe anyone of us an explanation as to why you all have chosen hospice at this time. Sending love hugs and prayers to all of you! ❤
You are doing the right thing. Not beating cancer doesn’t mean she has failed…it means she was never going to beat it. She has fought long and hard and she deserves to be able to rest.
As a nurse the most loving thing you can' do for her is to know when the cancer is just too much and to love her enough to let her go without pain and suffering! You are doing the right thing!
I am with you 100%. As a nurse,I have watched over zealous medical staff do unspeakable things in the name of progress. As a human who fought cancer and thankfully won,I can attest to the absolute misery both physical and mental aggressive treatment. I remember telling my mother (she went for every treatment). on my next to last chemotherapy treatment….. I can’t do this anymore,please just let me go. It is horrible for the patient. FYI…I have no idea why the medical staff did not opt for a portacath early on. If you are in this position, please insist on it. It is a small devise,implanted under the skin of your chest with a tiny tube that goes into a blood vessel. This eliminates all “IV access problems”. Blood can be drawn,transfusions given,chemo given,etc with ONE stick. No continuous jabbing and missing. God bless all of you💕
Hospice is the right choice. It was time. No need to do things that aren’t going to do any good in the long run. So happy to see that you all have figured that out. AND… hospice will be so helpful for your entire family.
She has you, SHE'S LOVED!!!!! I just made that decision for my brother, but , the suffering he would go through would be overwhelming. I know that. We Love him it's time to let go. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ❤❤❤🙏🙏
Hospice is not giving up. It is choosing as many good days with family as possible. It is not lack of treatment. It is just different treatment. And it is for the whole family. Including kids.
Well said! ❤
No way to say it better than this!
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Amen to that 🙏 what was said is so true .
Absolutely agree. Thanks for expressing it so well.
I have issues with people thinking not doing a treatment means that a sick person is 'giving up' or 'not fighting'. I really wish that we wouldn't equate 'fighting' with doing a treatment. Acceptance isn't giving up. You all are fighting for Sarah with your love.
Well sure it is giving up...but giving up on treatment is the only logical decision when it's clear that treatment is no longer viable.
Well said🩵
So well said. It's not giving up on life, it's choosing what life will look like.
@@songbird5266 She's giving up on treatment, not life, as treatment is no longer a viable option.
I have issues with that as well. Do people really think that??
If they have followed the channel and Sarah's struggles, they should know that she certainly isn't "giving up"
This young lady has fought and continues to fight!!
As an RN, I long ago came to realize quality of life is more important than quantity. This is the most loving and selfless decision you could possibly make. She’s surrounded by love from all of you and all of us, and what more could anyone ask for in their last days. Always sending Love, Hugs and 🙏. ♥️
Much love to Sarah!
As a hospice nurse, I must say, you explained “why hospice” perfectly. Sarah is in such loving, good care with you, other family/friends and her hospice team❤ She’ll receive amazing end of life care. Call for any reason, concern, question. Doesn’t matter what time of day or night. Don’t hesitate. A nurse will talk you through it or come out in the middle of the night and stay until all is well. You are kind and you made a good choice.
Thank you so much. The whole team we’ve met so far has been amazing!!!!
@@SDawson398 This is evil, don't do this on such a video. Also, these are false teachers.
@@SDawson398 I'm sorry that you are deceived.
@@SDawson398 Salvation does not rely on knowing about the men you point to.
Hey this is not the time or place to start your own personal views. A family is preparing to lose a person who is loved. Children are losing their mother, a man is losing the love of his life. If you cannot be kind get off the comments.
As a retired nurse I understand Josh. Sarah will pass with dignity. No pain, no suffering. My heart breaks for your children. This is going to be difficult for them. But you and Sarah have amazing family. You will help each other get through this. Bless you Josh 🙏🏻❤️
💜🙏✝️
As an ER nurse, I witness things much worse than death every time I work 😔 Hospice is the most loving and kind gift you all could ever give Sarah. I wish you all comfort and peace.
May God bless you. Thank you for what you do
💗
As a critical care nurse, I cannot agree with you more. Beautifully said. Hospice is for comfort after all other medical treatments are exhausted. As hard as it is to say, at some point treatment does not work for stage 4 cancers. Sarah is in good hands all the same where she can go out with love and comfort and peace. I am praying for you and your family, Josh.
Thank you for saying that. I am also a nurse, and have spent time crying because I had to be the one doing all the poking and prodding, because the family wanted to “do everything.” When my whole heart just wanted to make her comfortable, put on some beautiful music and tell them to hold her hand. ❤️
Also a nurse. and feel hospice is often an underused resource.
Josh, you do not have to explain to anyone why you all chose to honor Sarah's wishes regarding her quality of life. She has fought so hard, and this is not giving up in no way, shape, or form. The cancer has taken over, anyone who understands cancer (I've lost so many loved ones and family to stage 4 cancers) and what it can do if it's terminal. Please spend as much time as you can with her and your family. It's okay. The ones of us that truly understand will be here waiting for you. If you need to vent, cry, laugh, and love, we are here for you all! Sending love to Sarah and family ❤️ 🫂
Exactly, so we'll said.
Agree wholeheartedly. We should all respect Sarah’s choices and her family during this time. 🙏
Such a beautiful message!❤️❤️
P
I know where you are coming from I have walked In your shoes and I feel the pain you and your family have in making the choice of respecting Sarah wishes. It is torture for you to let her go but you ar showing Sarah you are kind and have made the best choice which is torture for you and the family. Tell Sarah her words BE KIND AND MAKE GOOD CHOICES WILL FOREVER BE IN OUR MINDS I will never forget her and how her strength she has had the last6 yrs. 😢😢
May the road rise up to meet you. May the wind be always at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face; the rains fall soft upon your fields and until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of His hand Sarah.
This traditional Irish blessing which is an ancient Celtic prayer comes with much love and prayers from Ireland.
It’s so beautiful .
I love this prayer.
I have told my family, I do not want heroic efforts made. Place me in hospice, and let my journey be filled with kindness, peace and love.
As a nurse I have told many families….sometimes it takes more love to turn them loose than to hold on! You made the right decision❤🙏
The only ones who can make this decision is YA'LL. There is no explanation needed. All we are here to do is support in PRAYER and LOVE! And that, we shall continue to do. ❤️🙏❤️
Amen.... well said ❤
So true ❤
People can learn from his explaining.
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Exactly! Thanks for saying that.
Hospice is comfort care. When comfort is needed. It’s not about fighting or giving up. It is a gift for the person who is sick and for the family who cannot make her better. When the treatment causes anguish, what good is it? She has trusted you both to “make good choices” for her and you are honoring her wishes. I’m praying for all of you.
When I was sitting with my mom while she was actively dying, in the middle of the night a voice came into my head and it said “there is only love.” And this is true, there IS only love. And it is love that makes you know what to do. Sarah will continue loving you all, just from another plane. You will see her again. God bless you.
Love how you stated that.
@@pogfam How much time have they given her until she passes? Of course that's NOT written in stone, it's the individual person. Some pass quicker than they say, some pass later. I hope for a painless as possible, stress free as possible passing. Cancer, Parkinson's which is what I have and numerous other diseases are very cruel. With animal medicine we are taught to end their suffering with 1 single injection whereas we are forcing people to die at the terms of their disease, not on their terms.
Beautifully said.
This is powerful
They don’t give us time really, I’m going based on previous chats a couple weeks maybe.
No matter what anyone says, choosing hospice is not giving up. It is supporting Sarah’s need for comfort and peace. It is allowing yourself and the family to spend time with her without watching her suffer.
As someone who has survived cancer, I am so so very proud of you and Sarah's family for making this choice to honor her life. I was extremely clear with my kids--when life is only extended. but there is no quality in the extension, all treatment stops immediately. 'Fighting cancer' isn't black and white. I feel it is better to say, 'fighting for quality of life'. Proud of you.
If you have stage 4 cancer you really can’t fight it because currently we don’t have the treatments available to fight stage 4 cancer properly. So what you’re fighting for is a little more time but not the cancer because as of today stage 4 cancer will win. Therefore it’s no fight.
@markm4623 but you can still have quality of life for an extended period of time with treatment BUT when it gets to the point that treatment will cause more harm than good its time to have compassion and have as many good days with your family on hospice
Good days on hospice? Seriously? I’ve seen many in family in hospice and what I saw wasn’t good days. It was them becoming a baby again, unable to feed themselves, bathe themselves, or pee or poop. That’s why I advocate for the choice of euthanasia. That choice should be on the table and it’s not currently
@@madelainemadelaine2934 Death is natural yes but murder is not only unnatural but it is illegal. If any regular person were to do what many hospice nurses do to our most vulnerable under the guise of 'relieving pain' , they'd be on trial for murder or at the very least, be facing manslaughter charges. The fact is, while not every single person is forced into hospice, the majority of them are either not given informed consent or are straight up in hospice against their will. Now again, this isn't EVERY case but it is the majority of cases. There have been many cases of murder in these hospice centers and many family members deceived into placing their loved ones into the care of Hospice have been speaking out and telling their stories. Our most vulnerable are at risk and while some people may willingly choose hospice/palliative care (that is their choice and I respect that wholeheartedly), most people do not and this is what bothers me the most!
Very well said, my son in law passed from stage 4 lung cancer this last spring. It wasn’t the cancer that got him, it was a procedure to help him breathe easier. While in surgery, something didn’t go right. He passed very quickly, we wasn’t able to get the time, some cancer patients get, but he fought hard for two years. I am proud of all the cancer patients, I started following cancer patients and their families over two years ago, when we found out. Cancer is not black & white, and it’s very cruel. And for everyone who knows how hard it is, thank you, for your fight. Maybe some day, we will have a cure for all cancer. I think, I started originally following cancer patients, to know what to expect in our battle. But no two cases the same, there is no rule book, just be grateful for every minute we have them. My heart aches for each and every family I am following.
My husband died 4 months ago. He was under hospice. They were wonderful, so caring & supportive. They kept him comfortable and supported. No pain at the end. I never could have managed alone. I am so grateful for them. I have maintained a close friendship with one of the nurses. Such a blessing!!!
@@fx-studio she had melanoma for 6 years way before the Covid Vaccine. Note not everyone that received the Vaccine got sick.
I'm sorry for your loss and as conflicting as it is to say I'm happy for you both you got the kind and supported goodbye you have 🙏❤️
😢🙏🏿❤️🥰
Jean, I sorrow for your loss.
Prayers.
@@fx-studiodid you miss the part where she has had cancer for over 6 years?
This is not about me, but I want you to know that I have fought mental illness, medication-resistant depression and anxiety for many years. I was sitting in my therapist office this morning and I talked to her about Sarah. I told her that Sarah’s wish was for us to be kind and make good choices. I realize that although depression is not a choice, I am blessed to be able to make choices for myself. I am bound and determined to do a better job in my life to make good choices for myself and others. Again not about me, but about the difference Sarah has made for all of us to witness her strength and courage. Thank you for your willingness to share Sarah with us. 🙏🏻
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Sarah's legacy throughout the world, beautiful xxx
You are so right. Having been a nurse for 30 years and being with so many people at the end, I can say that accepting that death is coming is NOT giving up… it is moving on to the next step. Allowing someone that you love to go with peace and dignity truly is selfless and definitely “a good choice.” I am praying for peace for you all.
Beautifully said. X
I was first diagnosed with cancer in 1999, and again in 2019. I’m in remission right now, but all of us cancer patients know cancer can rear it’s ugly head again at any time. I hope, if that happens, and the time for intervention is past, my husband can make this same choice. At some point, chemo, immunotherapy, etc. just causes more suffering and hospice is a blessing. It is in NO WAY giving up. It’s supporting the patient and the family during transition and controlling the pain that comes with this disease. NOBODY who hasn’t had cancer (or supported a loved one with cancer) can understand. It’s NOT giving up….❤️
Very well said🙌🏼🩷🙏🏼
Get a lIving will made up specifying what care/ treatments you do and do not want.
You said it right. They are "being kind and making good choices" as Sarah's always advised them and us. She deserves this time to be surrounded with love....❤❤❤❤
Absolutely True...Some people just DONT UNDERSTAND and shouldn't be judging her decision.
@@winniethepoohandeeyore2exactly. When my sister was going through treatment for metastatic breast cancer, we knew exactly what her wishes were. Fortunately, she lived in California and they have death with dignity, so we never had to make the decision for her. She decided when she was done.
Hospice is not giving up! It is gaining quality of life. She’ll die with dignity, no pain and not suffering! I’m so glad you are honoring her life and loving her as you have always had. You both and your family are in my prayers. I’m a death doula and chaplain hospice and if there is something I’ve learn is that “you can’t fix but you can love” and that is exactly what you are doing. 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🌟🌟🌟🌟
Sarah’s moto is “Be kind and make good choices”. I believe you have done just that! ❤ Praying for you all! ❤❤❤
Hospice today is very different from hospice years ago. It no longer means that death is imminent. It's wonderfully supportive for whatever time is left, both for the patient and her loved ones. Our experience when my sister was dying from her cancer was one of the most beautiful experiences of my life. Death cannot be held back forever. Bless you, Sarah, and all those who love you.
This is an extremely difficult time for the family. A justification for a hospice decision is a private family matter; no justification to anyone is needed.
Knowing Sarah can just rest and be made comfortable is a relief to me, and you all have time to accept that her body is tired. Love ya'll.
My mother died at hospice. And as weird as it sounds, I will always look back at it with gratitude. Trained and professional staff at hand at all hours, pain relief, but primarily all focus on HER. Things had been complicated on numerous levels, not involving her illness, but at hospice staff took over with making decision with HER best interest at heart. She was dying, nothing was going to stop that, so comfort care and pain relief.
How you even have the strength to do videos is beyond me. Thankyou. Though please spend time with your family. We will all be here in the future. Bless Sarah. We are all praying for you to get through this as well as you can.
I think you all are being KIND to Sarah and you've all made GOOD CHOICES for her. Not easy, she has fought so hard. Sending prayers to you all.🙏❤️
I agree 100%❤
Agree!
Also agree
Sarah’s body has been through so much. She’s been a trooper. She’s tired now. Praying for God to give her peace and comfort. God Bless her. ❤️
trooper
My mom is in hospice too. She can’t talk but she isn’t in pain. I am so sorry. This all happened so fast. She spread so much awareness about melanoma, and you guys are so kind that you share your story.
Wishing you strength through this tough time with your mom. I went through that with my dad 33 years ago (lung cancer) and I am still very thankful for hospice and all they did for our family, to help care for him and support us all through his dying process. It was a sad time, but also a privilege! I can honestly say it was a relief, for him AND for us, when he got to celebrate his "new birthday". You are a loving daughter to do this for your mom's sake. God bless!!❤
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@@melanieredfield9736 my mom has a rare brain disease and every now and then becomes aware of what’s going on and starts crying, it’s heartbreaking! We try to keep her happy and distracted most of the time by just smiling at her and telling her we love her.
@@Goldenretriever-k8m those moments are hard. When my dad was still hospitalized, before being sent home with hospice care, I noticed he never asked even once about test results, diagnosis, etc...very unlike him. Several days later, he said "they told me I have cancer." So I asked him if he knew what kind and where, and he said "no." I asked him if he wanted to know that, and he said "yes", so I told him. It went like that throughout his illness. He seemed shocked & worried that hospice was involved and I know he understood that meant he was terminal, but we only discussed to the extent that he asked bc it seemed like he really wasn't prepared to hear it, and I didn't want to force matters if he hadn't come to terms with things just yet. I wondered if he was even grasping it entirely, and felt like we should talk more openly so we could give each other emotional support...but how do you open that conversation???? Luckily, I found out that the hospice chaplain was able to do that. He discussed his concerns & regrets, his hopes for his family, and his fear of what dying would be like. The chaplain was so great....he actually got on a flight from Florida to California, to go talk to my brother-in-law on my dad's behalf because they'd had some strain in their relationship, and my dad wanted a sense of reconciliation & closure before he died. I was very grateful to this pastor for being there for my dad in ways that he needed, but felt would be too painful for my mom & my sister & me. If you aren't sure how to comfort your mom when she cries, ask hospice to send their chaplain to talk with her. Even if she can't verbalize her thoughts, they are wonderfully compassionate & able to help with each of your emotional and spiritual needs, not just physical pain. I hope that helps.
Your in my thoughts i wish you strength and peace x
Josh, You have made the right decision for Sarah and I have so much respect for you. This is probably the hardest thing you will ever go through in life and we are all here to support you and Sarah. ❤️🙏
“Be kind to her and make good choices for her” That’s what she wanted❤
Nobody can ever question you about your decisions with Sarah. You can only take this dreadful inness one moment to the next. I know what my beloved daughter went through.
Agreed. Though there were some fair questions, not so much about our decision but trying to understand why.
You are such a lovely man .. I’m sure You are making all the best decisions you can for Sarah . This must be such a very difficult time for you and your little family . I wouldn’t want to suffer either . Surrounding her with love is what she needs , you are so right on there . Thinking of you all . X x x x
Amen!!!! So true!!!!!🥰🥰
@@pogfam it's beyond our understanding. Love conquers all.
I have been on this road with several friends . No one should ever question those decisions. Watching someone you love go through this is indescribable. Much love to our POG family and to you Beverlywilson.
Sarah fought with everything she had. And you stood right by her and fought along with her. It’s time for Sarah to live in peace and enjoy the live that surrounds her. This wasn’t an easy choice. We all know that. But it was the most loving choice. The kindest and most sensible choice. God bless you all.
Nicely said ❤❤❤
How fortunate she is to have you.
Josh, you are a living example of what it means TO BE KIND AND MAKE GOOD CHOICES. ❤
I’m with a Hospice and am silently thanking God that you came to that decision. It was obvious the cancer was at a point of no return and fighting it was just more pain and misery with the same result as stopping treatment.
Hospice is not giving up because it is giving hope for final days that are pain free, in comfort, lucid moments with family around sharing memories and no more suffering. There are no intrusive treatments with Hospice, not even needles. Pain meds will be administered under the tongue via a small syringe and will be absorbed into her system immediately from there.
I would not try and feed her anymore or even give drinks. The nurse will have swabs to keep her lips and mouth wet and will leave with some. However food and drink will cause her to vomit and that is miserable.
That part of the body has shut down and does not need food or want it. Digestion, believe it or not takes up a tremendous amount of energy as it is a process which starts at the mouth and continues until the elimination of waste. The body instinctively shuts down that process at this point and there is no hunger felt by the patient.
The body wants to use that energy to keep important essential organs for life, like the heart and lungs, still working. It’s the body’s way of staying alive as long as possible.
Feeding a person now or giving drink interferes with that process only causes vomiting or the aspiration of food into lungs as swallowing is not easy and then she would be dealing with aspiration pneumonia. Food could cause a bowel obstruction as well as digestion has basically shut down. She feels no hunger so just concentrate on comfort needs and keeping lips and mouth swabbed. Your hospice nurse will explain all that.
I know someone will always be with her and since hearing is the last sense to leave us be careful of what is said in her presence.
You have been helping her fight this battle so beautifully and dutifully all along. Now it’s time to continue that at a sadder time but it can be the best you have done for her yet. Sometimes patients are so comfortable with this care that they live longer and even have a little rally.
God bless you all. I fully understand this time and Hospice is the greatest gift you can give her now.
Hospice isn’t the greatest gift. It’s just the only option the law gives them. Euthanasia is the greatest gift. What hospice does is force people to slowly die, basically becoming a baby again not even able to control their own bodily functions. Other adults will be bathing you, changing your diapers or cleaning you up. Why put people through that? Maybe because the hospice industry makes a lot $$$?
bettyforan1065. Thank you for educating us all....
My heart is pouring Love to you. I lost my 39 year old son to colon cancer last year. Hardest time ever, everything you are saying is absolutely correct. Honoring your loved one is the most important thing. I purchased Sarah’s book with the family tree, i will treasure it!. I use it to write to my son. Love to your family ❤❤
Linda bless your heart. I used to write letters to my mom. Hugs
@@avarismimi it has a way of easing the pain, ❤
My sincere condolences to you.
No one should be questioning these decisions, they are hard to make. Let’s surround this family with love, peace and comfort🌹
I don’t think anyone was questioning the decision, but rather why the sudden change in the decision out of curiosity. He explained it well here, although he didn’t have to. 💚
Dear Josh, arranging hospice for Sarah right now is the most profound act of love ❤️ She now can finally rest and be loved. She would be so thankful to you and her sister for making the right choice. Because I truly believe there is a point where treatment is no longer helpful, but this is. It’s hard to know we won’t see her anymore. Please give her a huge hug and lots of kisses. And thank you for this update. I’m always so glad to hear from you. Love you all so much and thinking of you.❤
Hospice many times is at home with nurses/caregivers coming in to help keep one comfortable and support the family.
@@barbklayman7429That’s good🙂
It's better to keep her as comfortable as possible...Hospice is good for that.
❤ "Love, not cancer, defines our last month together." (Sally Painter) 🥰
You have done an incredible job caring and helping your wife through this cancer. You know what your wife wants and you are doing the right thing.
Hospice is so totally the right choice. To have someone you love suffer needlessly and keep on treating would be cruel. You all now have the time to solely. show your love to Sarah till the time she decides to go. And no more pain. Love to Sarah and her valiant fight against this disease. 😢❤ Love you all
My grandpa passed away due to stage 4 cancer a few years back. It went to his lungs, liver, kidneys and brain. Once it gets to the brain there's only so much that can be done. The doctor gave him 4-6 months to live; he only made it to 3. The radiation treatment was getting torturous and it was decided to go the hospice route. I understand and respect your decision. Best wishes to you, Sarah and your kids and family
Thank you for giving Sarah the DIGNITY she deserves now to fly Free💘🙏🦋🌈🌈❤
This is not a battle. It’s not about beating this, or losing. This is truly a journey, walked in love & light. You are all so strong, and so loving. ❤❤❤
Oh Josh, you delivered this message so humbling and acceptance brings peace, we totally understand and as you say Sarah will never be forgotten, she and you have taught so many how to be kind and make good choices, we appreciate you sharing this with us and giving you and Sarah huge hugs. Stay blessed 💜💙💜💙
Hospice IS choosing life and mercy. And my prayer for Sarah and you all is that when God chooses to embrace Sarah and bring her to her heavenly home to be with Him, that all are filled with peace of knowing that you did EVERYTHING you could and will, when the time comes, gently hand her over into God’s loving arms. Blessings
My husband died over 15 years ago from melanoma. It went to his lungs. But it progressed so fast from being diagnosed in July to passing away in November. It is a terrible disease and they have had many improvements in treatment since he passed but still not enough. My heart aches for you and your family. God Bless. 🙏🏻
I am so sorry to hear that but you are not giving up but you are what Sarah wants and her wishes its touch my heart and my heart goes out you and family and friends god bless you and family
Sarah is not giving up, my goodness she would love to see her kids grow up, it comes down to suffering and dignity, which hospice addresses , many people live quite awhile on hospice, and yes they are there for the full family, which will in long run help Josh and the children.There are so many good reasons hospice is so good for people in need of help with dying process , comfort, more quality not quantity, if meds don’t work hospice is just a call away to help.They assist in helping family get supplies needed.Hospice is for living while your dying.Sarah’s family know what’s best for Sarah.Thank you for update Josh, your the best.❤️❤️❤️
THIS is a husband. Watching the love of his life just melting away day by day, staying by her side and doing what he can to bring peace to her heart.
Hats off to you sir, even though I'm sure you'd much rather have your wife in good condition than any sort of praise you may get from outside.
I feel for you and your family, and I hope her final days will be filled with nothing but comfort, love, and warmth.
Josh, Sarah is YOUR wife and YOUR family. So now you are being kind and making good choices for her and your family. She knows you all love her and will always do the right thing for her. Please remember, we are all here for you. Much love to Sarah, you and your entire family. ❤
I am the mother of a 25 year old son that had mucosal melanoma. I understand each step that you have been through. Once it gets into the brain it’s so much more aggressive than before. I’m so proud of each step that you have been walking with your beautiful wife. I’m still praying for Sarah and you and the kids too. May God keep you and bless you.
Hospice is a gift. My Mom.was on hospise. I'm a only child.
I lost my older sister, a former nurse, to colon cancer 2 years ago. She chose hospice instead of pain when she understood her choices. I miss her but totally agreed.
Josh, I really know what you going through. My daughter made the decision to stop treatment 6 months before her passing. She chose quality over quantity. For me as a mother, it was very hard and painful to accept but I respected her decision and we enjoyed the time that was left. It’s very difficult to accept the reality but on the end of the day Sarah’s wishes are the most important. She deserves to be pain and suffering free after putting a six year continues fight.She deserves to spend time with her family without side effects of chemo or immunotherapy.I think you and your family are doing amazing job,making sure that Sarah is surrounded by love. You are all are in my prayers and thoughts ❤
@bohochic2459 Thank you🙏🏼
Dear Josh, Thank you for honoring and loving Sarah. Melanoma is a cruel thief. Cherish your time with your family. May God hold you and comfort you.
Nobody should be asking you why you're making these decisions, it's such a personal choice and we all know how much you love her and it's nobody business but you and your family's so just know we support you and are here as much as we can be for all of you.
Josh, you and Sarah’s sister made the right choice as hard, as painful as it was to make. I’m fortunate to have my mother who’s a palliative care/hospice RN and she said she felt Sarah’s body wouldn’t cope with the immunotherapy because Sarah couldn’t have immunotherapy without being on steroids and her brain needs the steroids. It’s a double edge sword - a cruel cancer type 😞. Sarah is like an angel that is only on loan, but I know I learnt a lot from her. I hope you are caring for yourself, Josh. I hope the children are coping. You’re a wonderful husband and father. Don’t ever think otherwise. Lots of love to Sarah, you, the children and the entire family. ❤️❤️❤️❤️ xx
Hospice Nurse Julie has a wonderful channel talking about death, what hospice care can and can’t do, the visible process of dying and in a calm, easy way to know what to expect.
I love nurse Julie she is amazing she has really educated me about the whole process of dying.
Sarah deserves a peaceful transition. Thank you for giving that to her.
I’m a nurse I understand everything you are saying sometimes emotionality outweighs physical treatments because you are at the point where continuing treatment isn’t going to save her and giving her unconditional love is more important im sure none of this is easy it’s heartbreaking for you all sending you all my love I just hope her suffering isn’t too long she deserves to be free to fly xxxx
Hi Josh, I am going through my own battle with cancer, and the hospice route is looming large for me. Most of my treatment paths end with palliative care. I fully respect the decision that you have collectively reached. Hospice is the kindest route at the point you find yourself. Please give Sarah a hug from me. Paul.
My mom had one treatment of chemo. She had a super rare form of cancer, but it had already spread. As it spread more my mom begged for death due to the pain and suffering. Thankfully she got a blood clot in her lung that took her instead of her just laying in pain even with high doses of pain meds. Unfortunately at the time dying with dignity was not a choice. It is now, and I know she would have taken that route. Cancer is cruel. I hope Sarah finds her peaceful out.
The 'treatment' options for Cancer are the most cruel!! Notice how chemo/radiation seems to succeed in destroying many things (mostly good things within your body. i.e ones immune function is just one example), but rarely (if ever) does chemo or radiation fully succeed in eradicating the Cancer itself.
How Kind you are, during this excruciatingly painful time, to make a video giving your reasons for the Choice you have made. You do not owe anyone an explanation but being the loving people you are you honored us with your time away from Sarah. I will live the rest of my days honoring Sarah's motto. 😢
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Thank you for honouring and loving Sarah. Love to all of you at this extremely difficult time. ❤
Hospice helps the whole family! It doesn’t mean she’ll die right away. Hospice makes it so much easier for the whole family. I promise. ❤🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️
How is this a good thing? I’ve seen loved ones in hospice. They die a humiliating death in my opinion. They lose all dignity. They can’t even bathe themselves, pee or poop on their own. You think this is easier on the family? To watch your loved one become like this day by day? For me, if I knew I was going to die, I’d choose euthanasia over dying a death like that.
Sarah probably had tears of relief. Especially when you have children, you do everything possible to stick around for everyone no matter what. She probably needed to hear that it’s ok to rest, stop fighting so hard. You made one of the hardest but most compassionate decisions for Sarah, and she definitely knows that. Sending hugs and loving thoughts your way!!❤
Hospice is living without pain. Hospice is love. Prayers for your family
Actually, Hospice is killing someone in the name of 'pain relief'...
People are so death phobic. We are all going to die. Making bad treatment choices that actually hurt the sufferer is not a dignified way to die. Also, accepting the inevitability of death is not 'giving up.' It is a radical and brave acceptance. I absolutely salute you and your decisions. We need to let our loved ones die with dignity. Thank you ❤.
The hardest decision I made for my very sick husband of 52 years as he was facing certain death …..was to let him leave treatment, hospital visits and physical suffering behind and be surrounded with love until the end. I have never regretted letting go, though I miss him so much! I do not see OUR decision as anything but selfless and KIND.
I understand the need for Hospice, do what is best for Sarah and your family, im praying for you and the family. Yes give her her choices and just love on her everyday is a blessing to have her.
Wise decision in this nightmare world you find yourself in. Sarah has done her best but the body can only cope with so much pain. It is time for Sarah to be loved. This ‘fighting’ talk that always comes into the equation when someone is going through cancer is unfair. No one knows the suffering that cancer victims have to endure. I have had this experience with my daughter. Your decision was based on true love for Sarah and we all agree with you. In sickness and in health. His bless you all🙏💚
Giving up, stopping the fight? People really had the nerve to say that?! I am incensed!
Sarah is a warrior. Sarah has fought for any treatment that could help even if just a little! She deserves more respect than that.
Sadly Sarah is in the process of dying. She deserves all of comfort as she goes through the process. And hospice provides support to her warrior family who has been in the trenches every step of the way.
They all deserve to choose comfort and support now as they all move through this impossible time.
I am so sorry.
Sarah is a ray of light. She has given us the biggest, bravest gift through these videos that will be here as well as the impact she has made on so many people. I am grateful that.
Hospice is a beautiful place! Its Gods waiting room its whatever you want it to be, Sarah will be well looked after and kept pain free(im speaking from personal experience,as much as it cuts you deep inside your heart its the kindest thing you can do for her
Bless you all huge hugs from Tracey in Scotland ❤
💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜 Sending you all positive energy! Hugs to all of you. Much Respect to you for respecting Sarah's dignity and wishes.
Josh, you and your family made the right decision because you selflessly based that decision on reality and what is best for Sarah, and that was done out of love. Cancer won’t win . Even if it takes her physically, her light will continue to shine forever, and the cord of love that connects you and Sarah can never be broken. May God Bless you all and grant you peace in your soul. 🙏
Yes. Cancer won't win. Because Sarah and her family are now deciding how much suffering it will inflict and for how long.
❤🙏We are all here for you josh and Sarah sending love and prayers ❤️🙏❤️🙏❤️🙏
Aawww don't feel guilty...this is the kindest thing you can do. My mom died 50 years ago this year and no, she is not forgotten. And I also remember 10 years old seeing her laid out and the peace on her face and I was happy she wasn't in pain any more and looked at peace
Hospice will make her comfortable and help her get through this rough time. No one deserves to be in more pain than needed. She's here, love her, laugh with her, cry with her, and just hold on tight to al the loving memories! Sending much love and prayers to this beautiful family!🙏❤
Hospice is the best choice in your case. You all made a compassionate choice. It's a good one. Prayers going up for love and peace.
When a patient decides to stop treatment, it is NOT giving up. I am so glad that Sarah is home with all of you where she wants to be and that she is being surrounded by love as she readies for the next phase of her journey. I was a hospice nurse and have been with many patients during the dying process. You are giving her the one of the most sincere gifts you can offer. I wish Sarah a peaceful and pain-free death, surrounded by all who love her. Wishing you peace.
In what turned out to be my husband’s final few days I asked the surgeon to tell me what he would do were my husband his father. He said that he would let nature take its course and not try a second kidney cancer surgery that had gone to his brain. It’s been fourteen years, but to this day I know we made the kindest decision we could to let him go in peace. The immunotherapy was brutal and the minute it had to be paused for anything, the cancer roared back.
God Bless - far too many young folks developing cancer right now.
My husband was in end stage liver disease and I used to fuss at him for not eating and what I didn't realize was it was his body shutting down and he just couldn't tolerate food anymore. I selfishly didn't like seeing him drying up and getting down to 90something pounds. I was thinking he needed the nutrition to get better but there comes a point where they aren't going to get any better and realizing that can be very painful. He never made it to hospice, a sudden massive stroke took him before he was hospice bound. I thank God he did go suddenly, without pain, in his sleep.
My mother was diagnosed with squamous cell carcinoma four years ago after many years of lichen planus in her mouth. She did radiation, chemo and immunotherapy and surgery, but eventually the cancer continued to spread. Her doctors recommended hospice, if she was agreeable to it, and she was. My dad passed away almost exactly 10 years ago after multiple chronic conditions worsened at once, and he developed dementia. He was only on hospice for 2 days, at a standalone hospice facility, before he passed, but he smiled and joked with the ambulance and hospice staff, drank a Coke, and said he was happy before he drifted off to sleep for the last time.
My mom chose home hospice for herself, and it was a blessing to her and my family that lived nearby who were caring for her). She said so every time we spoke. She died at the end of June after 3 weeks of compassionate care from hospice staff, comfortable and at peace.
I know this is hard for all of you, but you are making the best decision for Sarah and for all of you. ❤
I’m sorry for your losses.
Continuing treatment is just prolonging Sarah’s suffering and only slightly delaying the inevitable. It’s a merciful choice to let Sarah be comfortable in her own home and surrounded by those who love her the most. Prayers for you all at this difficult time. ❤
Sounds like the same thing that Jenny Apple went through when she tried immunotherapy. Horrible reaction. Your devotion to your dear Sarah radiates from you. Thanks for the video and hugs to you all. ❤❤❤
Sarah isn't giving up. She's giving cancer the middle finger and telling it that it can't have her body anymore ♥♥♥ All my prayers and love are with you all. Hug Sarah for all of us.
I have cancer all over and I have decided to let life take it's course. I want to see as much beauty in the world as I can and not be sick when I have no support system. 0 people I'm just ready to go happy and peacefully. God bless your family
I live in the skin cancer capitale of the world QUEENSLAND. MY hubby just had a Melanoma off his face. One doctor had said it was ok, Now I worry constantly. ❤❤❤❤
Surrender is the ultimate act of courage. When my Mom went into hospice it really helped the family accept she was dying. We accepted that there is a quietness and a beauty to allow nature to take its course. Everything we’ve done before they was unnatural and it bought time but at an expense. Now is the time to just shower her and each other with love. ❤
Perfect choice. Hospice is treatment. Keeping her comfortable and allowing all of you to be with her at home is the best treatment for all of you. Hugs and love to all of you
You guys have been so gracious to take us on this journey with you all. It's really sad to me that you also feel like you have to explain why hospice. Don't let people question your decision's or make you feel like you owe anyone of us an explanation as to why you all have chosen hospice at this time. Sending love hugs and prayers to all of you! ❤
Good decision! Peace and sending love ❤
You are doing the right thing. Not beating cancer doesn’t mean she has failed…it means she was never going to beat it. She has fought long and hard and she deserves to be able to rest.
As a nurse the most loving thing you can' do for her is to know when the cancer is just too much and to love her enough to let her go without pain and suffering! You are doing the right thing!
I am with you 100%. As a nurse,I have watched over zealous medical staff do unspeakable things in the name of progress.
As a human who fought cancer and thankfully won,I can attest to the absolute misery both physical and mental aggressive treatment. I remember telling my mother (she went for every treatment). on my next to last chemotherapy treatment….. I can’t do this anymore,please just let me go.
It is horrible for the patient.
FYI…I have no idea why the medical staff did not opt for a portacath early on. If you are in this position, please insist on it. It is a small devise,implanted under the skin of your chest with a tiny tube that goes into a blood vessel. This eliminates all “IV access problems”. Blood can be drawn,transfusions given,chemo given,etc with ONE stick. No continuous jabbing and missing.
God bless all of you💕
You don’t owe anyone an explanation…we will keep praying for you all. ❤🙏
Hospice is the right choice. It was time. No need to do things that aren’t going to do any good in the long run. So happy to see that you all have figured that out. AND… hospice will be so helpful for your entire family.
She has you, SHE'S LOVED!!!!! I just made that decision for my brother, but , the suffering he would go through would be overwhelming. I know that. We Love him it's time to let go. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ❤❤❤🙏🙏