Labeling Emotions Will CHANGE Their Perception Of YOU | Chris Voss
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- Опубликовано: 18 мар 2019
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Founded and led by former lead FBI hostage negotiator, Chris Voss, the Black Swan Group has 10+ years of experience working with companies and individuals on taking their negotiation skills to the next level. Chris’ book, Never Split the Difference, is a Wall Street Journal bestseller and has sold over 2 million copies worldwide. Our expert team of coaches discuss everything from silence techniques to influential empathy.
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Thanks for watching!
when everyone is going right...go left...labeling negatives has changed the way i do business. thank you brother
Therapy suggests having a person in need talk about their problems giving them an opportunity to vent. While the majority tell a person in need they understand, repeating the process until someone has gotten traumatic pain out of their mind.
In negotiations labeling a negative diffuses a negative, means hearing someone identifying your traumatic pain diffuses your traumatic pain.
In theory, this means someone could heal of traumatic stress twice as quickly.
This is BRILLIANT stuff! Can't believe he's not getting more eye contact. They must think they already know everything.
More than like they’re sales reps. They always know everything 😂
Might be corporate/mandatory. BS Group has some internal champions that know the value, but plenty probably attend thinking its just another ra ra training, and don’t realize what’s being put on the table.
In the middle of a deparmental meeting and I get a notification for this video on our 15 minute break. Using this technique right now.
I used it to point some things out with a colleague who never gets reprimanded and still has job despite treating people poorly. It encouraged more people to do the same technique and actually got some results that were unexpected.
@@RichLuciano1 the colleague opened up and and said they would do better in communicating in way that doesn't come across as strident or rude. Completely unexpected. Barely any push back. It could have been the timing or unseen factors that affected this result but it was very encouraging for the time being. It was all initiated after a notification on my phone. Must have been timing I guess.
@@RichLuciano1time will tell.
@@RichLuciano1 I am random with the comments. No updates coming. But thanks for the interaction. Good luck with the negotiating techniques.
Jonathan BLackberry That sounds awesome. Hope this experience has allowed you to remember “the use of negatives negotiation technique” up until now
The Black Swan Group is super accurate in 99.999% methods they teach.
The yes is buried in the no's
Chris, I'm in Los Angeles, and I plan to come to one of your seminars in the future. I want to shake your hand.
This Tactical Empathy, is a counter-intuitive negotiation superpower.
Thank you
thanks Chris
The “average Joe” or “Jane” needs to unlearn all of their old outdated communication skills.
HOLY SHIT! MY BRAIN KEEPS BEING TURNED INSIDE OUT. AMAZING! TIME TO BUILD SOME NEW NEURAL PATHWAYS
Chris, You are a champion!
Going to look for some more examples in your other videos so I can understand better. If it's not out there, please considering making something like that!
Thanks for all your extremely helpful guidance!!
Hi Chris.
Defusing negatives. True scenario.
A "You don't like me, do you?"
B "No mate. I like you........just not very much"
Lol That's hysterical. But also really good! I can't tell you how hard it is to get something that honest out of someone...
Excellent..thank you.
You're Welcome!!
In negotiations labeling a negative diffuses a negative, in Mental Health it means hearing someone identifying your traumatic pain diffuses your traumatic pain.
In theory, this means someone could heal of traumatic stress twice as quickly.
I use Chriss Voss technique to negotiate with myself. Many technique are similar to those use in psychology
you might as well address negatives upfront, why? because the other person has them on their mind all teed up figuring out how to say no to anything else to avoid.
Jordan Belfort has talked about this for decades ...
Good editing. Timing is good. Slide transitions were kinda weird.
👉 "I'm sure this can sound disrespectful.."
👉 "Seems like you don't like me.."
I think a better way to say it would be: I'm really sorry. Seems like I dropped the ball? Seems Like I said something that was off-putting?
Love these informative videos in this room / setting.
Would it be a bad idea for the Blackswan RUclips channel to offer these videos for download and / or purchase for people who live overseas?
I see what you did there 😉
It seems like Chris has to say yes to this one😂😂😂😂
🤣🤣
We do! Visit www.blackswanltd.com
Could someone help me and explain what label means?
I was hoping to hear a few more examples since I know that it is not my intuitive nature to do this. Or maybe I'm just slow LOL
So by labeling the negative are you addressing the negative and resolving it?
The scientific explanation is that the negative emotions in the amygdala (75% of the space is dedicated to negative ones) keep distracting us and influencing the way we think, when you address an emotion it goes towards the prefrontal cortex (the conscious logical/rational part) and it's solved there.
Instead of constantly making noise from the background, the emotion goes to the logical part and from there the person decides if it's true and what to do with it, having understood it properly.
@@Life-Sky I'm scared of bringing up objections that are not even there in their mind. Because... You never know what they ate thinking. Why introduce another thought?
@@alexanderwindh4830 That's exactly what the book (Never Split the Difference) talks about . It literally does the technique in the book to get us away from the fear of trying it.
I was so afraid of trying it too! Afraid of people doubling down and saying: "Yeah you are an idiot, it's your fault, now take responsability".
One time I had a huge fight with my father (the kind of fight you don't talk to each other ever again) but I needed to solved it to finish university...
I was soo embarrassed to say some things about myself and I knew I would lose my temper if I talked on the phone, so instead I wrote a whatasapp with the "accusation audit"> I wanted to delete 50% of it because of how unconfortable it was, but i sent it anyways (something like this):
"You probably think I only talk to you when I need money. You may think I'm ungrateful for all you do, that I don't recognise what you do for me and that I don't love you. You probably think I don't care about you, because I don't do anything in return. That I'm a bad son""
- I felt so exposed.
After sending it I just went to sleep, I couldn't take the tension of waiting. When I woke up I read his reply:
"Sorry for what I said last time, it wasn't because of you I was having other issues
I don't think you are a bad son"
Then just like that, it all went away.
@@Life-Sky amazing ❤️
Told a girl I know that looks incredibly sad and exhausted "looks like you've been through a lot"
She got upset at ME for basically saying she looked worned down.
Can't even say a woman looks tired
Sorry to hear about that experience. Seems like you were wanting to be helpful but she took it the wrong way. This is nuanced. It's an easy mistake to point out a flaw in someone else when trying to address a negative. It requires practice to learn how to do one and not the other. I find a good rule of thumb to be: wait until they say something that hints at a negative before addressing it. If someone is just happy and walking around and you say "it seems like you're depressed" it doesn't work as well as when someone first tells you their day is not going well. Best of luck in your endeavors!
Labels bring the psychological war on the field of the counterpart's mind before he even realizes what is going on
Is "labeling" being used here as a synonym for "pointing out" or "establishing"; or is it being used in some other way? Examples are great for exposure, but not so much for analytic understanding.
labelling is a technique, you start with 'it/you sounds/seems like' it engages the listener far more
@@corberus3119 so its considering an idea you otherwise would assert. Considering instead of asserting for the sake of drawing out a particular reaction. Is that right?
I like to think of it as getting ahead of your negotiating partner's potential negative feelings about you or the situation. If you're worried that you might be perceived as pushy, label it! Say "I know you're tired of me calling me and asking about this deal. You probably think I'm being pushy." Either make them say, "no I don't think you're being pushy" so you can further engage them in tactical empathy or if they agree, then hit them with a what or how question: "how can we get this done so we can get back to doing business?"
It seems like you're not familiar with the black swan method
Where can i find the full version of this?
www.blackswanltd.com
Am i the only one who didn’t understand the video, not even after reading all the comments?
18 mo. in 7 days ? How can you be sure it wasn't the sheer persistence of staying engaged》》 for a year & 1/2 - that really sealed it?!
@Natural Born Hustler✓ no two deals are the same!❗
Apologies, I still don't understand, labeling a negative (?)
you say it before they say it.
that way you disarm the bomb before it blows up in your face.
f.e. pricing. if you think he finds you too expensive you bring it right up like "i might be too expensive for you."
now he has to justify himself instead of you trying to explain why your worth it, what can be difficult after he trow that nade.
in short: whoever has the ball on their side has the disadvantage of having to counter the argument.
like in tennis. serving is an advantage, returning is harder.
the transitions of the video are annoying ;-) ...
The guy yawning in the back, the dude in the black suit not buying it, the girl in front doesnt know what to make of it. This crowd sucks
The down votes on this comment are probably going to look bad to you
This vid fails to teach anything. Just a click bait tease. Come on.
Jared Coffin you need to read the book. It explains it
Most of his online stuff is to sell offline stuff. He is a negotiator after all. But if you take some of the concepts and search further, you find it. He didn't make any of this stuff up himself.
Jared he was the lead FBI kidnapping negotiator for many many years; this is all common sense what he is teaching; everyone wants to be understood and acknowledged; by everyone I mean the voices in their heads; but hey common sense is the most uncommon thing; read his book; it will be one of the best books you ever read
What are you talking about, he taught us the importance of diffusing the negative rather than accentuating the positive and how to actually do it. All in just 3 minutes! What more do you want?
It seems like you're angry about this video being click bait. Have you been distracted while watching this video?