About 10 days after this was published I attempted to take my own life. After some recovery, a friend suggested watching Ted talks - I used them as a distraction to take my mind from my life. Then, I found Brené's talk on vulnerability and shame. I wanted to hear more and so found this interview with Lewis. Through Lewis, I found Tom Bileyu. These people have guided in changing my mindset and are helping me to save my life.
I'm sorry, Keith, for what happened to you that led to your attempt....I'm glad you found a way out. I hope you find happiness! A world with Keith is better than without :)
“I belong everywhere I go, no matter where it is or who I’m with, as long as I never betray myself. And the minute I become who you want me to be, in order to fit in and make sure people like me, is the moment I no longer belong anywhere.” - Brene Brown Wow! That’s life changing!
I can definitely take that lesson forward. I need to take the time to think before I speak. I know it will save me from a lot of regret later. Unfortunately, impulsivity comes along with my ADHD. ❤🙏❤
So proud of Louis for being publicly open about being sexually abused. This happened to my husband when he was around 11 or 12. After a few years of dating he told me, "I have to tell you something and you may not want to be with me after you hear this." He told me how this friend of his uncle's convinced him to sleep without anything on and then he woke up to the man raping him. OMG, my heart went out to him so deeply. How could he think I wouldn't want to be with me because some rapist took advantage of him when he was a kid? I felt so bad for him that he carried a false sense of shame about this for so many years. It wasn't his fault! Why did he feel responsible for the depravity of another human being? Please know that if you were ever abused as a child, IT WASN'T YOUR FAULT!
I love how she has the courage and the confidence to take the time she needs to answer a question. By letting the Silence BE she gives even more POWER to her message. #INSPIRING
Can be difficult to find the balance between being yourself and adapting/being open to other ways of thinking. I guess it’s just important to stay alert to it and, as long as you’re respecting your own perspective while still being open and willing to change it if necessary, you’re facing in the right direction.
I have been the lowest I have ever been in my life recently. I've been soo vulnerable it has been hard to talk to anyone at all but I started speaking to someone I know from decade ago that called me brave. I didn't see what he meant until I listened to this. I shouldn't be ashamed of being vulnerable it is my strength
Sorry to hear of your struggles...I have been going through similar times, very up and down, but I realized it's because I'm growing and changing for the better. Look up Dark Knight of the Soul.... might help... be kind to yourself.
First of all, i'm so proud of you for taking the iniciative and talking to someone even though that its hard for you, (and i have the same problem with opening up to other people and asking for help, just like you do, so i tottaly relate to that), but you were able to put your fears aside to put yourself first and that is one of the bravest things someone can do. And second of all, a lot of people NEVER realize ao much strengh it takes to be vulnerable and never leave the stereotype around vulnerability, and YOU DID, so you only have reasons to be proud of yourself like i am for you❤. Be safe, TAKE CARE of yourself and keep being brave. Happiness is something that is ALWAYS worth fighting for because at the end of the day...that's what we live for💞
@@nanaman Hi 👋i know that you probably are never seeing my coment and that i'm just a random stranger to you, but i couldn't be indiferent towards what you said about your situation. I just wanted to let you know that it's ok to NOT BE OK and thar your never going to be selfish for putting yourself or your happiness first for once. It's amazing that you want to makw shure that the people that you love are doing good, but i'm pretty shure that if they like you and care about you, they would want you happy and they certainly wouldn't be mad at you for taking care of yourself for once, because your well being matters as much as theirs and they'll support you. Taking care of other people is important but taking care of the only person that is gonna be with you forever is even more. DON'T BE AFRAID OF ASKING FOR HELP!! Because putting your fears aside to put yourself first is the bravest thing someome can do, trust me. I'm here for you, you're not alone and you never will be. You'll get trough this❤ I believe in you❤
Ugh telling your kids “you always belong here” made me cry I grew up in a family of 7 and none of us ever felt like we belonged I am a mama of three boys and I will always remember to integrate this and instill this into them that we value them and love them no matter what! I also love how true you are to yourself the way that you admit to being a chameleon and how you practice not trying to be who others WANT you to be in order to belong, wow such an amazing and admirable VOICE you have thank you for being authentic and raw. ❤️🙏🏼
Anna I am the oldest of 7kids so close to age and now we are adults we talk about how we never felt like belonging. Every single one of us are struggling with our own traumas
I've known Brene's talks and books for some time and I really love her work and personality. But in this talk I am especially impressed by and grateful towards Lewis. It almost never happens that a man openly lets himself be truely seen in front of other people. Sharing your story and owning it shows such a great amount of currage and strength!!! Thank you so much for you're honesty! I love belonging to a generation where men start to come back to life emotionally and claim the right to feel and love and connect authentically. As far as I know, Lewis has not yet been interviewd by Oprah, I'd love to see that interview...
I've watched Brene Brown interviews for a few years now. This is by far one of the best, engaging, and authentic interview I have watched. I am not familiar with the interviewer but he just gained a fan. Great listener, excellent follow up questions, just overall superb job.
"To own your story and love yourself through that process. That is greatness to me." I have read all of her books and listened to her for years. She continues to amaze me! What a remarkable interview. Wow!!
"you can lose yourself in the fitting in; but you can also lose yourself in the rebuttal of fitting in". VERY deep thought. I've seen this extreme with both groups--those who just want to be accepted by everyone and those who at every instance rebel against everything just to be perceived as revolutionary and relevant. And both groups are usually FAR from the truth. It's the biggest challenge of being social beings--first and foremost, being authentic and accepting of yourself.
Totally agreed, it's taken me a life time to first "like me" then to move on to "love me"...of all the people on this tiny blue planet, I am the only one I will never lose, or leave, so the first and single most important thing to do, is learn self love, then we have love to share. . . Namaste'
Fantastic and natural interview. No *agents* pausing the video, correcting her responses. Zero edits. No fluffy music. Lots of silence. SUPERB QUESTIONS! She TAKES HER TIME to reply. I don't think BB ever says ummmmm.... neither does Lewis. Yes, so many have commented how humble Lewis is as an interviewer! He obviously has a tremendous heart and learned a lot about females through his mother and sisters ♥️ female friends and the first breakup he shared about. He even *finishes* her sentences! Such a candid man! #Braveheart! 🤜🤛🥇💯 Talk about healthy!!! Beautiful heart. Beautiful. Raw and #legit dialogue.
46:26 Wow! This woman is brilliant! Her ability to always find the perfect quote about a situation and then to explain in depth how the quote relates to her topic is amazing to me.
4 questions you NEVER answer and yet the road to deeper answers heal self and the world 1) Who am I? 2) Who/where are my people? 3) What is my purpose? 4) what do I need?
YEEEEES LEWIS THANK YOU!!!!!! You guys are literally changing the world with this podcast. So, so, so much richness and wisdom and juicy delicious truth and guidance. I am 25 years old and am soooo grateful that my generation has access to this kind of stuff. How extraordinary!!! Especially compared to earlier generations. We are changing the world and despite what some people say, I truly believe the world is becoming brighter and lighter and more pain- and shame-free every day. And it's partly due to content like yours. Connecting and healing, one step at a time. Thank you!!!!!
Ok, and now tell me where to find people who like that too so I'm not so alone. People have problems with honesty and authenticy. They back away from it.
How very grateful Brene Brown must be not to have made the drill team. What a wonderful gift to the world it is to the world to have her beautiful heart to guide us away from "cookie cutter" attitudes that so many think of as success.
My parent's generation (they would be in their 80's now) experienced very tough circumstances and did the best they could. I respect how they parented now that I am older. I grieve for them in that they missed out on a lot of happiness and exploring their gifts and dreams because they couldn't. They had to survive.
the Charlottesville portion of this talk, was amazing to watch. This was a perfect example of being uncomfortable, vulnerable and BRAVE. THANK YOU so much for sharing!!
"I belong everywhere I go, as long as I don't betray myself or become who you want me to be. As long as I belong to myself." Yessss!!!! Love this work 🧡
She is so right! Constant education and discomfort are key to discovering your privilege. Consistent curiosity, humility and learning will make you conscious! Brene Brown, keep keeping it 100! You're on fire.
God I just love her so much and he's an amazing person and interviewer. Thank you Lewis and Brene. I cried like 5 times during this interview. There is SO MUCH love here. These are the faces of true heroes....showing up when it's not easy.
Lewis, I know I have told you before but I will say it again. You sharing your personal story of being picked last and how it motivated you to become a sports super star but left you empty.. is so powerful at this time in history. We need young men like you to speak out and be vulnerable which is so attractive in relationships. You are on track. Thank you for being brave and vulnerable. And Brene, from a fellow Texan, so proud of you and your dedication to your sharing your results from all your research. You are an amazing young mind and I salute you! Thank you!
Adults that come through child abuse and flip their horrific experience into helping others are living saints. Imagine you are saving lives. This is the "Ultimate Purpose" in life. Well Done Lewis for making a positive difference in this messed up world of ours✨.❤✨
This is the greatest interview I've watched in such a long time. I have no idea how I've not seen this channel before but Lewis, you are a spectacular interviewer - I love these thoughtful and meaningful questions. I was moved to tears several times throughout this interview - I love Brene, I love how she paused and really thought about her responses and how none of that is edited out. The silence is part of the space, and that's a beautiful thing. This just blew me away, every bit of it. I look forward to watching more of this channel, and reading Brene's book. Thank you RUclips for suggesting this to me, finally something worth watching!
Our global problems and stand offs come down to issues of the heart; pride, thirst for power, desperation, fear, they are all heart issues. Come to the table willing to have clear conversations with humility, transparency and authenticity and many of these issues will be dealt with in a civil and agreeable manner.
Thanks for the insight of vulnerability to the guest Mrs. Brown. Thanks for all you do. I apologize for the long comments. I just realize so much more goodness in life exists, enough to move forward by listening to your show again and again. I am so grateful for your content, because I can keep getting a better sense of self beyond the little frustrations among the daily routine that can beat me down. Honestly, I never knew how well connected on RUclips that compassion ever could be as displayed until viewing your channel. Makes me feel really better within to see the breadth of sanity in the world. And my fear of the world is subsiding.
Brene truly explained the misconception about men at 48:29 ! That's on point and absolutely fact! We are all wired up with the idea and misconception that men are supposed to be strong, dominate and lead where in fact men are equally as vulnerable like women or any other gender orientations. Brene is correct by saying that the problem about men is to perceived as weak!!!!
Today January 6 2021 I see there is 564 people who don't like the video and I think to myself what is it that they do not agree with ,their opinion, perspective.
😮😢❤This though I am curious if I belong and Believe in something just myself but not something Greater than one’s self Our Worth Value Searching to Define this elusive “ it” A knowing Higher Power? God? Is then that a sense of Belonging ?
Brené...you are THE TRAILBLAZER. AND you have a whole bunch of people stumbling behind you trying to catch up! Keep up the great work! Thanks for doing this interview Lewis. Awesome job.
"Discomfort is the great enemy of courage." B.B. I love that. I always take so much away from Brene, and this was a great conversation between you two.
"I belong to me" this is so significant to our self esteem and self integration. We constantly feel the need to fit in, to belong but that does not work.🙏
Lewis, thank you for interviewing Brene Brown, she has long been the voice of wisdom I look to when I feel lost, she radiates authenticity and that's rare. And thank you for being candid about your own experiences. I think what you're doing is amazing and you continually inspire me and a lot of other people. I hope you know that. Big love to both you and Brene
This particular part was profound: “the opposite of belonging is fitting in. Fitting in changes who we are betraying who you are. True belonging never asks us to change who we are, it demands we BE who we are.”
Thank you for your honesty Lewis so inspiring to hear a real man own his story and share it so that others know they are not alone, very powerful and as discussed, demonstrates your courage and strength 💪🏽Brene Brown is such a refreshingly honest inspiration I love how she is clear about who she is and explains how we must be vulnerable to be real, belong and give and receive love. I have discovered Brene and yourself this year during a particularly challenging time in my life and I feel so grateful 🙏🏼 Thank you Brene for acknowledging the power of your privilege to address the most important of issues even though you know that you will receive criticism 🌟you have both inspired me to be real and speak my truth and be kind to myself when I make mistakes along the way 🙋🏻X
@Black Knight Fool why so much judgment sir for him owning his life story? lots of judgment seen from you so far. can u talk more about that and why its important for you to attack the person, with labels rather than the idea or content?
What I love in this speech is what you both said at the beginning of your talk. You both are still figuring out who you are. It is so refreshing to hear this. Where I came from everybody pretends like they are so sure of everything and they always say they know who they are.And as you could imagine this could be so so very confusing.
The end of that interview actually brought tears to my eyes. Such an amazing interview. Superb questions. Even the silence between the questions where she deeply thought about the answers where great. Her definition of greatness is the best answer I've ever heard!! Thanks Lewis! 👏🏼
"I'm adaptable. Adaptable is great. Anyone who comes to my home I can make you feel great. But if I become so adaptable that I change who I am so you will like me that's the moment I betray myself"
Standing here in my little kitchen with tears of gratefulness and being touched in the midst of my heart❣🤗🤗 Thank you Brené❣ Thank you Lewis and team❣ Your conversation covers the core of my needs❣🙏🙏 May The All There Is bless you more than ever before💞 To me this is like a 'Soul-Erotic' as my Centre of Being feels at Home💚
I'm so tired of being a door mat. I don't like who I am. There is a little girl in me who doesn't know how it feels loved safe value..im very grateful for you mrs.Brown. for in watching your podcast this is my starting point. To learn how to love and heal. I'm not my past, I do have a future
Lewis has such a sweet loving personality. It's reflected on his face and reactions. I'd wosh to work for him and otherwise couls work on one podcast with him. And in the pause dance a salsasong. But actually the message is that I really like the way he communicates. He's is like a teddybear with all the respects. He is warm, open, tender, smart, interested and so much more. Thank you for all these nice interviews and example of being. 🙏
Brene fills me with so much hope that our generation is figuring it out. Emotional awareness is soooo powerful. Her line about parents who just say “I’m done” and stop growing and learning was so powerful, because even calling that out and putting a language to it made me so full of emotion. Thank you for all the work you do to understand humans.
“Own your story and love yourself through the process” - that’s greatness. “Vulnerability is emotional exposure” “Own your story and don’t let your story own you” Great video :)
@brenebrown, your message is never outdated. I didn't even realize that this was 2017 until I looked for the date so I could search your FB live posted that you reference in this interview. Same thought applies to every day...always. Thank you for being you and sharing how we find our own way, by sharing the work you have done. ❤
Nailed it. Love and belonging come from within. If you try to get it from circumstance you suffer. Try giving love and acceptance to others instead of getting it from them. ✌️❤️🕉
"I belong to me" that's so powerful. The challenge is real because we're social creatures who do need others. I found similar people to me while growing up, but I did have to suppress so much because of the religion I was raised in.
I was raised as a Jehovah's witness and appearances were everything. Any attempt of self expression was ridiculed and even punished. I learned to wear a mask and isolated myself to feel totally free to be myself. I understand so much more about the reasons why I feel like I don't belong anywhere... Thank you very much for this interview, it's made me want to be braver 💕👍
This is what I try to help my counseling clients grasp! In my work as a mental health therapist, I've discovered so many people aren't showing up in their lives how they are uniquely created...not in their relationships, not in their jobs, not even with themselves. Thank you for articulating so well how vital and lifegiving it is to be yourself, even when it's hard. I will probably start using this video as a resource with my clients in my counseling work.
21:00 YES YES & YES - when you're raised with 'trust no one', no progress can be made... _until_ at last you learn to reach out and ask one trustworthy human being for some help.
I love listening to Brenè. SOMEHOW she’s able to speak about things that are difficult or uncomfortable and make the problem sound incredibly approachable. You can tackle it. It just amazes me. So inspirational!
This popped up and I'm watching it now.. I'm crying my eyes out as a mother of 2 grown up sons 2 grandchildren whom I reared on my own.. both run successful businesses the oldest boy 35 years old told me he was abused at 9 years old by a in law family member. It has made him do things in his life because of this trauma.. my heart breaks as I blamed myself but more importantly I told him he's not to blame. Heartbroken to say the least. I can relate to this woman.
Brene, I love how real you are! Everything starts with us and who we are. The opposite of belonging is fitting in.....and many times people lose themselves in that process.
Hi, Lewis! What an amazing conversation between Brene Brown and you. I was violated too before I was 5 years old. As a teenager, I thought sex was something all teenagers did. In my 40s I stepped way out of line and paid the price by being labeled a sex offender for life. I am 71 years old now. I blame no one but myself for drinking too much back then and doing such a terrible thing. Society lumps us all together and labels us 'evil', without realizing that most offenders are normal people who made a terrible mistake. Murderers are allowed back into the workforce, and into the normal stream of things but we are 'branded' and rejected for life. I am thankful that I met an unbiased, loving women more than ten years ago, that accepted me with the 'branding' and still decided to be part of my life. Today, I have peace in my heart (and acceptance) because of her. Continued success to you Lewis. Joe
When you said it was healing to watch your daughter experience high school was healing was so powerful. I have to say it is so healing to see my son flourish. ❤️🩹
About 10 days after this was published I attempted to take my own life.
After some recovery, a friend suggested watching Ted talks - I used them as a distraction to take my mind from my life.
Then, I found Brené's talk on vulnerability and shame.
I wanted to hear more and so found this interview with Lewis.
Through Lewis, I found Tom Bileyu.
These people have guided in changing my mindset and are helping me to save my life.
Wow! I love to hear that!
I'm glad you were unsuccessful in your attempt to "end it". I I understand that depth of despair.
🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Same👍💓
I'm sorry, Keith, for what happened to you that led to your attempt....I'm glad you found a way out. I hope you find happiness! A world with Keith is better than without :)
“I belong everywhere I go, no matter where it is or who I’m with, as long as I never betray myself. And the minute I become who you want me to be, in order to fit in and make sure people like me, is the moment I no longer belong anywhere.”
- Brene Brown
Wow! That’s life changing!
The way she stops to think before she answers - so natural and sincere.
Omg that is my favorite part of her! So genuinely thoughtful and mindful of everything she puts out ❤❤
I hope you have a great life ahead ❤
I can definitely take that lesson forward. I need to take the time to think before I speak. I know it will save me from a lot of regret later. Unfortunately, impulsivity comes along with my ADHD. ❤🙏❤
To the 1% reading this... I wish you nothing but prosperity and success
Same to you 🙏🌈
May you receive 10 fold back. This is going to be an amazing year for you!
Thank you and the same to you too
Huh? What is the downside of this..
Culture Fuzz likewise! Blessings
So proud of Louis for being publicly open about being sexually abused. This happened to my husband when he was around 11 or 12. After a few years of dating he told me, "I have to tell you something and you may not want to be with me after you hear this." He told me how this friend of his uncle's convinced him to sleep without anything on and then he woke up to the man raping him. OMG, my heart went out to him so deeply. How could he think I wouldn't want to be with me because some rapist took advantage of him when he was a kid? I felt so bad for him that he carried a false sense of shame about this for so many years. It wasn't his fault! Why did he feel responsible for the depravity of another human being? Please know that if you were ever abused as a child, IT WASN'T YOUR FAULT!
My discomfort is my privilege. So true. It is a privilige to be in discomfort. So one can grow inside.
I love how she has the courage and the confidence to take the time she needs to answer a question. By letting the Silence BE she gives even more POWER to her message. #INSPIRING
Agreed!!
Yes, I noticed this too!
Valérie Djoumessi yesss
Agree, and she's so comfortable with sharing her own vulnerability. She's incredibly inspiring.
you know this interview isn't fluff and talking points, she's doing the work right in front of you.
There is one simple word to tell who you are, Brene and Lewis: you are LIGHTWORKERS.
"I belong everywhere I go, no matter where it is or who I'm with, as long as I never betray myself."
Love this👏
Yeah but it is very lonely
@@stardust7176Tell that truth
That's the highlight for me
Can be difficult to find the balance between being yourself and adapting/being open to other ways of thinking. I guess it’s just important to stay alert to it and, as long as you’re respecting your own perspective while still being open and willing to change it if necessary, you’re facing in the right direction.
This interviewer is so filled with love it's just amazing. And he is actually humble.
I agree, it's so easy and enjoyable listening his interviews
And judgement of others. Very politically assuming.
@@IvanaSkoko qqqqqqq000000000000000000000qqqqqqq
A
He definitely won me over!!
Really? I had to turn off the interview. “Other people wanted you here, now they can stop asking” then proceeds to monologue. Not my jam.
I have been the lowest I have ever been in my life recently. I've been soo vulnerable it has been hard to talk to anyone at all but I started speaking to someone I know from decade ago that called me brave. I didn't see what he meant until I listened to this. I shouldn't be ashamed of being vulnerable it is my strength
Sorry to hear of your struggles...I have been going through similar times, very up and down, but I realized it's because I'm growing and changing for the better. Look up Dark Knight of the Soul.... might help... be kind to yourself.
I have been trying so hard to make sure everyone else is doing OK but I’m so miserable …. I can relate with this
First of all, i'm so proud of you for taking the iniciative and talking to someone even though that its hard for you, (and i have the same problem with opening up to other people and asking for help, just like you do, so i tottaly relate to that), but you were able to put your fears aside to put yourself first and that is one of the bravest things someone can do.
And second of all, a lot of people NEVER realize ao much strengh it takes to be vulnerable and never leave the stereotype around vulnerability, and YOU DID, so you only have reasons to be proud of yourself like i am for you❤.
Be safe, TAKE CARE of yourself and keep being brave. Happiness is something that is ALWAYS worth fighting for because at the end of the day...that's what we live for💞
@@nanaman Hi 👋i know that you probably are never seeing my coment and that i'm just a random stranger to you, but i couldn't be indiferent towards what you said about your situation.
I just wanted to let you know that it's ok to NOT BE OK and thar your never going to be selfish for putting yourself or your happiness first for once.
It's amazing that you want to makw shure that the people that you love are doing good, but i'm pretty shure that if they like you and care about you, they would want you happy and they certainly wouldn't be mad at you for taking care of yourself for once, because your well being matters as much as theirs and they'll support you.
Taking care of other people is important but taking care of the only person that is gonna be with you forever is even more.
DON'T BE AFRAID OF ASKING FOR HELP!! Because putting your fears aside to put yourself first is the bravest thing someome can do, trust me.
I'm here for you, you're not alone and you never will be.
You'll get trough this❤
I believe in you❤
this man is an absolute sweetheart I love how open he is
"The opposite of belonging is fitting in." That's... I have no words. Wow.
I know this years ago but please help with locating this line
Ugh telling your kids “you always belong here” made me cry I grew up in a family of 7 and none of us ever felt like we belonged I am a mama of three boys and I will always remember to integrate this and instill this into them that we value them and love them no matter what! I also love how true you are to yourself the way that you admit to being a chameleon and how you practice not trying to be who others WANT you to be in order to belong, wow such an amazing and admirable VOICE you have thank you for being authentic and raw. ❤️🙏🏼
Anna I am the oldest of 7kids so close to age and now we are adults we talk about how we never felt like belonging. Every single one of us are struggling with our own traumas
How incredibly real, humble and inspiring. Why don't we have people like this running our government??
Love it, Brene for office :)
It would be a better world to live in.
Marni M for that very reason
how fucking good would that be. sorry for f word . I m from England and we could do woth her running our country too xxxx
We need people to be this honest, and authetic, only when you are being authetic could you attract others who are authetic as well :)
Who else discovered this in 2020!? 100% Necessary especially with all that is going on. Thank you!
YES. Even after Biden's election, it still is.
Brené’s research has always been so valuable and it is now more valuable than ever.❤️
Me!
I just discovered it yesterday lol and it still ALL APPLIES!
2022!
I've known Brene's talks and books for some time and I really love her work and personality. But in this talk I am especially impressed by and grateful towards Lewis. It almost never happens that a man openly lets himself be truely seen in front of other people. Sharing your story and owning it shows such a great amount of currage and strength!!! Thank you so much for you're honesty! I love belonging to a generation where men start to come back to life emotionally and claim the right to feel and love and connect authentically.
As far as I know, Lewis has not yet been interviewd by Oprah, I'd love to see that interview...
It is refreshing to see him make bold attempts to relate. He is well younger than her and yet she is listening. May we all have the courage to listen.
He has been soo open...
I agree. He's a beautiful person 💙
Yes, he's very impressive
I've watched Brene Brown interviews for a few years now. This is by far one of the best, engaging, and authentic interview I have watched. I am not familiar with the interviewer but he just gained a fan. Great listener, excellent follow up questions, just overall superb job.
"Our tolerance for discomfort is zero." Amazing quote!
Mine is even less than zero. I anticipate future discomfort & get nervous about it before it happens. Lol
So true! But it's in that discomfort that our freedom is hiding!
Oh is it egoist or just hedonist path ?
@@andymusicstudio2485 7
I'm helping my inner child by listening to this and re-mothering myself
So, in short, you are using the same kind of techniques that good therapists use.
One of my favourite sayings is "It's never too late to have a wonderful childhood" and that includes nurturing the child within.
She is like a mirror and a healer at the same time...... She speaks about a human thing.... Our emptiness..
Me too
Amen!!!
I’ve always felt alone in this world never truly fitting in. Now I’ve found everything within myself and that’s enough. Truly at peace.
🙏🙏🙏👏👏
"To own your story and love yourself through that process. That is greatness to me." I have read all of her books and listened to her for years. She continues to amaze me! What a remarkable interview. Wow!!
"The opposite of belonging is fitting in, because you are changing yourself to be what others want." BB
That doesn’t feel right to me. I have boundaries based on my values, but changing just means I’m flexible.
"you can lose yourself in the fitting in; but you can also lose yourself in the rebuttal of fitting in". VERY deep thought. I've seen this extreme with both groups--those who just want to be accepted by everyone and those who at every instance rebel against everything just to be perceived as revolutionary and relevant. And both groups are usually FAR from the truth. It's the biggest challenge of being social beings--first and foremost, being authentic and accepting of yourself.
Totally agreed, it's taken me a life time to first "like me" then to move on to "love me"...of all the people on this tiny blue planet, I am the only one I will never lose, or leave, so the first and single most important thing to do, is learn self love, then we have love to share. . . Namaste'
A key is to fit with a good and grow but not fit with a bad and shrink.. but it requires a wisdom and grace from Lord
Fantastic and natural interview. No *agents* pausing the video, correcting her responses.
Zero edits.
No fluffy music.
Lots of silence.
SUPERB QUESTIONS!
She TAKES HER TIME to reply.
I don't think BB ever says ummmmm.... neither does Lewis.
Yes, so many have commented how humble Lewis is as an interviewer!
He obviously has a tremendous heart and learned a lot about females through his mother and sisters ♥️ female friends and the first breakup he shared about.
He even *finishes* her sentences!
Such a candid man!
#Braveheart!
🤜🤛🥇💯
Talk about healthy!!! Beautiful heart. Beautiful.
Raw and #legit dialogue.
46:26 Wow! This woman is brilliant! Her ability to always find the perfect quote about a situation and then to explain in depth how the quote relates to her topic is amazing to me.
4 questions you NEVER answer and yet the road to deeper answers heal self and the world
1) Who am I?
2) Who/where are my people?
3) What is my purpose?
4) what do I need?
3) What is my purpose? I have decided what my purpose is and now the hard work begins to realize it....
YEEEEES LEWIS THANK YOU!!!!!! You guys are literally changing the world with this podcast. So, so, so much richness and wisdom and juicy delicious truth and guidance. I am 25 years old and am soooo grateful that my generation has access to this kind of stuff. How extraordinary!!! Especially compared to earlier generations. We are changing the world and despite what some people say, I truly believe the world is becoming brighter and lighter and more pain- and shame-free every day. And it's partly due to content like yours. Connecting and healing, one step at a time. Thank you!!!!!
leonaleo
Well said , me too 💖
I hope so 🙏
“Belonging is the courage to stand alone and to belong to yourself above all else”
Ok, and now tell me where to find people who like that too so I'm not so alone. People have problems with honesty and authenticy. They back away from it.
❤❤❤
How very grateful Brene Brown must be not to have made the drill team. What a wonderful gift to the world it is to the world to have her beautiful heart to guide us away from "cookie cutter" attitudes that so many think of as success.
My parent's generation (they would be in their 80's now) experienced very tough circumstances and did the best they could. I respect how they parented now that I am older. I grieve for them in that they missed out on a lot of happiness and exploring their gifts and dreams because they couldn't. They had to survive.
the Charlottesville portion of this talk, was amazing to watch. This was a perfect example of being uncomfortable, vulnerable and BRAVE. THANK YOU so much for sharing!!
She's awesomely human, genuine and courageous. Appreciate you Brene!
"I belong everywhere I go, as long as I don't betray myself or become who you want me to be. As long as I belong to myself."
Yessss!!!! Love this work 🧡
"No one wants to be vulnerable and everyone wants to be brave. It doesn't work like that."
She is so right! Constant education and discomfort are key to discovering your privilege. Consistent curiosity, humility and learning will make you conscious! Brene Brown, keep keeping it 100! You're on fire.
“Own your story and love yourself through that process. That’s greatness to me.” -BB
I love this woman for her work and willingness to share so lovingly. My heart was beating fast throughout most of this interview.
As a clinical Psychological Dr. Brown is the primary source of inspiration I recommend to my patients. She is a national treasure.
God I just love her so much and he's an amazing person and interviewer. Thank you Lewis and Brene. I cried like 5 times during this interview. There is SO MUCH love here. These are the faces of true heroes....showing up when it's not easy.
I have met her twice in person. She really is as wonderful as she appears and perhaps even more so.
Lewis, I know I have told you before but I will say it again. You sharing your personal story of being picked last and how it motivated you to become a sports super star but left you empty.. is so powerful at this time in history. We need young men like you to speak out and be vulnerable which is so attractive in relationships. You are on track. Thank you for being brave and vulnerable.
And Brene, from a fellow Texan, so proud of you and your dedication to your sharing your results from all your research. You are an amazing young mind and I salute you! Thank you!
A wonderful conversation by two inspiring humanitarians, Brene Brown and Lewis Howes. "Peace, love and global unity."
Adults that come through child abuse and flip their horrific experience into helping others are living saints. Imagine you are saving lives. This is the "Ultimate Purpose" in life. Well Done Lewis for making a positive difference in this messed up world of ours✨.❤✨
Just curious if you identify as one of those people or just want to encourage them
This is the greatest interview I've watched in such a long time. I have no idea how I've not seen this channel before but Lewis, you are a spectacular interviewer - I love these thoughtful and meaningful questions. I was moved to tears several times throughout this interview - I love Brene, I love how she paused and really thought about her responses and how none of that is edited out. The silence is part of the space, and that's a beautiful thing. This just blew me away, every bit of it. I look forward to watching more of this channel, and reading Brene's book. Thank you RUclips for suggesting this to me, finally something worth watching!
The most important thing to know is that we are children of our Father in Heaven, who loves and knows us personally.
Our global problems and stand offs come down to issues of the heart; pride, thirst for power, desperation, fear, they are all heart issues. Come to the table willing to have clear conversations with humility, transparency and authenticity and many of these issues will be dealt with in a civil and agreeable manner.
She is humble, genuine, open minded, grateful and wholehearted. It is a good healing to watch her!
Dude, you are so good! I love Brene and was excited to watch HER but had no idea that I'd end up loving you so much too. Amazing stuff.
I feel the exact same way.
"Be smoking hot and brilliant but don't ever look like you're putting any effort towards it."
💅 nailed it 🔨
On the outside, I am smoking hot, always dressed to the nines, but on the inside, I am a yucky 🤮 mess.
Thanks for the insight of vulnerability to the guest Mrs. Brown. Thanks for all you do. I apologize for the long comments. I just realize so much more goodness in life exists, enough to move forward by listening to your show again and again. I am so grateful for your content, because I can keep getting a better sense of self beyond the little frustrations among the daily routine that can beat me down. Honestly, I never knew how well connected on RUclips that compassion ever could be as displayed until viewing your channel. Makes me feel really better within to see the breadth of sanity in the world. And my fear of the world is subsiding.
Just so beautiful. The entire conversation. The end nearly brought me to tears. So genuine.
I say: Brene Browne for President! God, how I wish that could happen!!!
I love that line "I belong to me", it's good, thank you :)
You've been interviewing really quality people lately. Keep it up!
Brene truly explained the misconception about men at 48:29 ! That's on point and absolutely fact! We are all wired up with the idea and misconception that men are supposed to be strong, dominate and lead where in fact men are equally as vulnerable like women or any other gender orientations. Brene is correct by saying that the problem about men is to perceived as weak!!!!
Today January 6 2021 I see there is 564 people who don't like the video and I think to myself what is it that they do not agree with ,their opinion, perspective.
"I can't imagine a way through what needs to happen in the next decade...that does not involve understanding pain."
My God. Well. That's true.
😮😢❤This though I am curious if
I belong and Believe in something just myself but not something Greater than one’s self
Our Worth
Value
Searching to Define this elusive “ it”
A knowing
Higher Power?
God?
Is then that a sense of Belonging ?
Brené...you are THE TRAILBLAZER. AND you have a whole bunch of people stumbling behind you trying to catch up! Keep up the great work! Thanks for doing this interview Lewis. Awesome job.
"Discomfort is the great enemy of courage." B.B. I love that. I always take so much away from Brene, and this was a great conversation between you two.
I would say comfort is the enemy of courage. Comfort & courage don't go together.
Wow, such honesty and authenticity, thank you... What a beautiful, respectful, and deep human interaction. Powerful. ♡
Sharon Kinsella
"I belong to me" this is so significant to our self esteem and self integration. We constantly feel the need to fit in, to belong but that does not work.🙏
Lewis, thank you for interviewing Brene Brown, she has long been the voice of wisdom I look to when I feel lost, she radiates authenticity and that's rare. And thank you for being candid about your own experiences. I think what you're doing is amazing and you continually inspire me and a lot of other people. I hope you know that. Big love to both you and Brene
This particular part was profound: “the opposite of belonging is fitting in. Fitting in changes who we are betraying who you are. True belonging never asks us to change who we are, it demands we BE who we are.”
Thank you for your honesty Lewis so inspiring to hear a real man own his story and share it so that others know they are not alone, very powerful and as discussed, demonstrates your courage and strength 💪🏽Brene Brown is such a refreshingly honest inspiration I love how she is clear about who she is and explains how we must be vulnerable to be real, belong and give and receive love. I have discovered Brene and yourself this year during a particularly challenging time in my life and I feel so grateful 🙏🏼 Thank you Brene for acknowledging the power of your privilege to address the most important of issues even though you know that you will receive criticism 🌟you have both inspired me to be real and speak my truth and be kind to myself when I make mistakes along the way 🙋🏻X
@Black Knight Fool why so much judgment sir for him owning his life story? lots of judgment seen from you so far. can u talk more about that and why its important for you to attack the person, with labels rather than the idea or content?
What I love in this speech is what you both said at the beginning of your talk. You both are still figuring out who you are. It is so refreshing to hear this. Where I came from everybody pretends like they are so sure of everything and they always say they know who they are.And as you could imagine this could be so so very confusing.
The end of that interview actually brought tears to my eyes. Such an amazing interview. Superb questions. Even the silence between the questions where she deeply thought about the answers where great. Her definition of greatness is the best answer I've ever heard!! Thanks Lewis! 👏🏼
"I'm adaptable. Adaptable is great. Anyone who comes to my home I can make you feel great. But if I become so adaptable that I change who I am so you will like me that's the moment I betray myself"
Standing here in my little kitchen with tears of gratefulness and being touched in the midst of my heart❣🤗🤗 Thank you Brené❣ Thank you Lewis and team❣ Your conversation covers the core of my needs❣🙏🙏 May The All There Is bless you more than ever before💞 To me this is like a 'Soul-Erotic' as my Centre of Being feels at Home💚
I'm so tired of being a door mat. I don't like who I am. There is a little girl in me who doesn't know how it feels loved safe value..im very grateful for you mrs.Brown. for in watching your podcast this is my starting point. To learn how to love and heal. I'm not my past, I do have a future
Lewis has such a sweet loving personality. It's reflected on his face and reactions. I'd wosh to work for him and otherwise couls work on one podcast with him. And in the pause dance a salsasong. But actually the message is that I really like the way he communicates. He's is like a teddybear with all the respects. He is warm, open, tender, smart, interested and so much more. Thank you for all these nice interviews and example of being. 🙏
Brene fills me with so much hope that our generation is figuring it out. Emotional awareness is soooo powerful. Her line about parents who just say “I’m done” and stop growing and learning was so powerful, because even calling that out and putting a language to it made me so full of emotion. Thank you for all the work you do to understand humans.
Glad you enjoyed it! 🧡
Vulnerability is HUMANITY.
Lewis is the best interviewer and certainly demonstrates vulnerability. Thank you Lewis.
You can really tell you we're both in a secure zone of sharing, love this
Thanks!
Thank you so much!
“Own your story and love yourself through the process” - that’s greatness.
“Vulnerability is emotional exposure”
“Own your story and don’t let your story own you”
Great video :)
¨Greatness: to own your story and love yourself through that process¨
A lot of love but a lot of shaming when I grew up. I feel like I've spent my life repairing myself. It's crazy how profound the damage is
Keep digging my friend. Freedom is within reach!
You are not a problem to fix, you are a miracle to uncover ❤️
@@CherryBerryFashion the shovel keeps breaking.
@Defy9 Ordinary how selfless! Thank u
@Defy9 Ordinary I use and continue to use the "shovel"
@brenebrown, your message is never outdated. I didn't even realize that this was 2017 until I looked for the date so I could search your FB live posted that you reference in this interview. Same thought applies to every day...always. Thank you for being you and sharing how we find our own way, by sharing the work you have done. ❤
Ok, I wanna hug these 2 people...hell I wanna hug everyone! Loved it!
Sending love to all those suffering in any way. May your suffering bring you ease, grown and beautiful transformations ❤
Nailed it. Love and belonging come from within. If you try to get it from circumstance you suffer. Try giving love and acceptance to others instead of getting it from them.
✌️❤️🕉
"I belong to me" that's so powerful. The challenge is real because we're social creatures who do need others. I found similar people to me while growing up, but I did have to suppress so much because of the religion I was raised in.
This is, without a doubt, one of the most deeply insightful interviews I've ever seen. I am in awe.
I saw your Radio Station interview on HOT97; men speaking truth about their pain, that was something also.
I was raised as a Jehovah's witness and appearances were everything. Any attempt of self expression was ridiculed and even punished. I learned to wear a mask and isolated myself to feel totally free to be myself. I understand so much more about the reasons why I feel like I don't belong anywhere... Thank you very much for this interview, it's made me want to be braver 💕👍
I just love her!! She is so authentic and she makes me feel normal because we have vary similar personalities!! Thank you for this
This is what I try to help my counseling clients grasp! In my work as a mental health therapist, I've discovered so many people aren't showing up in their lives how they are uniquely created...not in their relationships, not in their jobs, not even with themselves. Thank you for articulating so well how vital and lifegiving it is to be yourself, even when it's hard. I will probably start using this video as a resource with my clients in my counseling work.
21:00 YES YES & YES - when you're raised with 'trust no one', no progress can be made... _until_ at last you learn to reach out and ask one trustworthy human being for some help.
I love listening to Brenè. SOMEHOW she’s able to speak about things that are difficult or uncomfortable and make the problem sound incredibly approachable. You can tackle it. It just amazes me. So inspirational!
This is an old interview, but i just listened to it today. I was glued to every word---very wise, loving and encouraging.
Thank you!
This popped up and I'm watching it now.. I'm crying my eyes out as a mother of 2 grown up sons 2 grandchildren whom I reared on my own.. both run successful businesses the oldest boy 35 years old told me he was abused at 9 years old by a in law family member. It has made him do things in his life because of this trauma.. my heart breaks as I blamed myself but more importantly I told him he's not to blame. Heartbroken to say the least. I can relate to this woman.
@@sarahsmith5045 yes it is wonderful. i think i am going to watch it again. much love to you.
The world needs more healers and peacemakers ... thank you !
Brene, I love how real you are! Everything starts with us and who we are. The opposite of belonging is fitting in.....and many times people lose themselves in that process.
I’m finally witnessing a truly courageous man. And, of course, I love what Brene brings to the table concerning illuminating shame and vulnerability.
I LOVE Brené Brown! She’s the best 😇
I love the way she smiles after speaking. So much warmth exudes from her.
Family and friends of choice. Love, belonging, connection.
Love belonging connection. my own people
Hi, Lewis! What an amazing conversation between Brene Brown and you. I was violated too before I was 5 years old. As a teenager, I thought sex was something all teenagers did. In my 40s I stepped way out of line and paid the price by being labeled a sex offender for life. I am 71 years old now. I blame no one but myself for drinking too much back then and doing such a terrible thing. Society lumps us all together and labels us 'evil', without realizing that most offenders are normal people who made a terrible mistake. Murderers are allowed back into the workforce, and into the normal stream of things but we are 'branded' and rejected for life. I am thankful that I met an unbiased, loving women more than ten years ago, that accepted me with the 'branding' and still decided to be part of my life. Today, I have peace in my heart (and acceptance) because of her. Continued success to you Lewis. Joe
This was one of the best interviews, I have watched in my entire life. Thank you beyond measure ♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥
When you said it was healing to watch your daughter experience high school was healing was so powerful. I have to say it is so healing to see my son flourish. ❤️🩹
That sense of aloneness and otherness is something so many of us struggle with...