12 Super Wealthy Elites That Died TRAGIC Deaths

Marcus Licinius Crassus
In ancient Rome, Marcus Licinius Crassus decided he wanted to be legendarily wealthy. And
boy, did he succeed. How did he do it? Well, let's just say he had a real nose for "fire sales."
Crassus would buy burning buildings at bargain prices, then use his private fire brigade to
extinguish the flames. But all that wealth couldn't buy Crassus military glory. In 53 BCE, he
decided to lead a campaign against the Parthians, presumably because "conquering
barbarians" looked better on a resume than "opportunistic landlord." Crassus marched his army
into the desert, confident that his wealth would somehow translate into military genius. But it
didn't. At the Battle of Carrhae, the Parthians introduced Crassus to their famous "Parthian
shot"-a move that involved shooting arrows while pretending to retreat. It was like a deadly
game of "made you look," and Crassus fell for it hook, line, and sinker. Crassus and his son met
their end on the battlefield. You know legend has it that the Parthians, with a flair for poetic
justice, poured molten gold down Crassus' throat after his death. It just goes to show: all the
money in the world can't buy you common sense-or, apparently, a decent battle strategy.
Henry Duke of Lancaster
In the 14th century, most nobles were busy perfecting their jousting techniques, but Henry of
Grosmont, Duke of Lancaster, decided to diversify his portfolio. Born around 1310, Henry wasn't
content with just being fabulously wealthy-he wanted to be fabulously interesting too. He
juggled more titles than a Netflix series catalogue. Earl of Lancaster? Check. Earl of Leicester?
Why not. Duke of Lancaster? Absolutely. He collected titles like other nobles collected peasants'
taxes. Henry became one of King Edward III's most trusted captains, probably because he was
one of the few who could read a map without holding it upside down. Not satisfied with just
military glory, Henry decided to become a founding member of the Order of the Garter. Now
how did he die? In 1361, after returning from abroad (probably exhausted from all that
overachieving), Henry fell ill. On March 23rd, he checked out at Leicester Castle, likely due to
the plague making its unwelcome sequel tour through England.

[@HellenBach]

-5000 aura points for saying Leicester like that 💀

[@TombstoneTubbs]

Lmaooo

[@zjsq1383]

How do you die shitting 😂😂😂

[@TombstoneTubbs]

Sometimes it gets stuck 🤷‍♂️