When it's time to let someone be wrong (Being right is not the same as being effective.)

“What a waste of time. This is stupid.”
More than once in my corporate job leading engineering teams I had a customer make unreasonable demands that led some people to react that way.
In one case, the client replaced the project manager on their side just a few weeks before go-live on a months-long project. We had been working with this client for over a decade, and the project plan had been settled before he came. Still, the new project manager decided that our team (and only our team) must complete a laborious, formal, comprehensive risk documentation and mitigation exercise before they would even hold another status meeting for the project.
In another case, a client claimed HIPAA laws forbid them from using our product without certain changes that would make make it meet their unique preferences. Attorneys from our company and dozens of our other healthcare clients disagreed with their interpretation.
Internally, we knew in both of these cases that what our client was requesting was unnecessary and even wasteful.
But we also knew that arguing with them would be even more wasteful. They were holding firm to their beliefs, regardless of the evidence.
I really don’t like acting as if I agree with someone when I am convinced they’re mistaken.
But being right is not the same as being effective.
So in both cases we made an investment in the relationships. We did what they asked, even while we remained convinced that their reasons weren’t sound.
And the projects moved forward to successful conclusions.
Later evidence confirmed our belief that the steps they had asked for shouldn’t have been necessary. But only by complying with their wishes could we earn the trust we needed to help them see a new viewpoint.
We had been right. But being effective meant releasing the need to be right. It meant allowing them to be wrong for a while even though it cost us some extra time and energy.
Knowing when it’s best to let someone be wrong is a tricky thing. If you’d like a thinking partner to help you process a scenario of your own, let’s talk. Visit stevedwire.com... for a complimentary conversation.