Sarah, I really need this right now. I hope that I am just readjusting since retirement. I just want to stay home and lie around. You are reminding me of many practices that I once did and had since forgotten. Your timing couldn’t be better for me. I know that many others will benefit from your videos. This is such a selfless act. Thank you.
I’m sorry you’ve been having a tough time - I spent much of my 20’s wanting to just stay home and lie around! Transitioning to retirement must be strange, but I hope you can find some hobbies and interests that really speak to you or some other way to make your free time more satisfying. Maybe volunteering somewhere? I appreciate you saying that, but this channel benefits me too. It’s a lot of work, but it brings me a lot of joy, so it’s not totally selfless 😋
Thank you! When I watch this video now, I can instantly hear in my voice how down I was at the time. The microphone cutting out was just the icing on the cake. I love how it turned out though - it was a great representation of the topic at hand. I really like the videos like this that I make at a time when I need the reminder myself. I obviously make content on stuff I’ve already learned and practiced and believe in, but it’s still helpful for me to watch these. I’m glad it is for you as well!!
This vid is Everything. So real and open. So great to connect with the hurt/depressed part of you as well as model the self compassion and pushing through so self sabotage doesn’t occur. You are inspiring ❤️
Thank you!! We can’t always avoid suffering, but a lack of self compassion adds another thick layer to it. Often, the only way out is through! No need to make hard times worse by feeling bad about feeling bad. And like you said, having that compassion also makes it easier to resist self sabotage and unhealthy coping mechanisms.
self compassion and giving myself credit are SO HARD for me. I struggle not to equate my value with my productivity. When I try to take a mental health day or relax, the guilt and shame eat at me. I've been looking into shadow work and learning how to re-parent the parts of my former self that need healing, but the positive self talk can sound delusional, which is bizarre, since the negative self talk lands so naturally. Number five is the key for me and reminds me there's hope. Reminding myself that I am capable, scrappy, and smart. I have done difficult things and I can and will do them again. Thanks for another great vid
Thank you so much for sharing - I completely feel for you! I’d highly recommend “The Self-Talk Workout” by Rachel Goldsmith Turow to help with the self talk aspect. That’s where the breathing exercise I’m planning on discussing next comes from, and there’s a few other things from that book I want to make videos about. It won’t help with the deeper aspects of the shadow/inner-child work, but I think you’d find it very helpful especially alongside that work.
@@kvispisianoplease let me know what you think! I was going to do a full “book report” video for it, but even my outline ended up being 10 pages long 😅 But I’m definitely planning on giving some of the strategies/concepts their own videos.
Thank you for sharing this raw version of yourself! It definitely gives me confidence to be more open with myself and others. All of your hard work and dedication towards your channel/ the content you provide is genuinely appreciated. It’s really helpful towards my mental health and daily struggles. 🙏💗
Aw thank you so much for your comment! It definitely takes work to move towards living more authentically, but it’s incredibly freeing. I hope you continue to find my content helpful ☺️
I think by reducing my association with BPD is helping and simply practicing good strategies that help with the same problems without the anxiety of thinking about my specific problems.
That’s why I try to stress that the topics I talk about on this channel that aren’t BPD specific still contribute to my overall recovery. A lot of symptoms are just amplified emotional and behavioral responses to common problems. Those strategies can help all sorts of people in different situations. I’m glad you’ve found a more helpful way of looking at it for yourself 😊
this is amazing, i just got dumped after a 5 year relationship, all your tips are so helpful especially tip #5. new subscriber! ❤ i love how you film in the sad spot btw. very relatable and real. and youre really pretty btw
Thank you so much!! I’m really sorry to hear about your breakup 😔 Heartbreak suuuucks, but you will get through this and be better for it. I’m so glad you found this video helpful, and I deeply appreciate the kind words!
No one has the right to go above and beyond to try and make my life as impossible and stressful as humanly possible. I don’t people making life harder than it needs to be
Im sorry you’re feeling that way because of someone else. I hope you can create distance or at least boundaries with them if possible, and that you find a way to take care of yourself and control what you can so you can lessen the effects.
This comment is a bit disjointed. It’s a combo of my notes on the video plus some reflections. It’s imperfect but I going to share it without further edits. Hey what’s up, it’s nice to see you again too. Cool, the magic snap worked. And apparently being near the floor helps too. Appreciation for Sarruh’s Sad Spot. Self compassion. This is a timely reminder for me to return to studying the mindful self compassion workbook. You said Self compassion is not lying. I will add that self compassion is not easy or automatic. At least not at first. Sorry your brain ain’t right right now. (Or then) “Be unto yourself as you would onto others.” Basics. Sleep diet and movement. It’s difficult for me to get consistent sleep. Sleep hygiene. I can improve my sleep. Gonna try to use Headspace. Do eat. With nutritional value. Movement, because it’s a less intense word than exercise. Something is better than nothing. Baby steps still count. Bonus points for nature and medicine. This one is hard for me. I’m a city mouse and am I door cat. Three. Resist drugs and alcohol. Negative effects. Escape and avoidance. Sobriety. Four. Take it easy and give yourself credit. How can I focus of simply sleeping and eating and moving when I have so many bigger things to worry about?? Build your foundation first. Not doing as much as you’d want. Do more it want less. Give yourself credit for any of your successes. Believe. Corny but essential. Believe in yourself Corey Wilks talk about limiting self beliefs. How about expanding self beliefs?
This really made me smile. It’s so nice to know people are really paying attention and taking in the messages of my videos - especially with the TikTok effect on attention spans. I appreciate and agree with your additional input as well. I look forward to hearing what you think of my other videos as you watch them! Thanks always for the support 😊
resisting drugs and alcohol can cause depression and all sorts of things. everyone rants on at that person to stop drinking but then when they do they get excluded because of the side effects of the withdrawal. so they need a safe place where they can be sure that they won't get chucked out, and not have someone harping on at them. so for partners and family members, if you want that person to stop bad habits you have to accept them for who they are in the first instance, and then give them space where they can make their own choices. give them alternatives, not just once but all day every day.
When resisting drugs and alcohol causes depression and other issues, it’s because the substances themselves are causing or masking issues - not because they are inherently healthy. So I do still suggest someone resist those substances to not worsen a difficult situation by using them as a coping mechanism. If someone has a serious addiction, yes, tackling it must be done carefully. I’m not making any suggestions about how family members or loved ones should support people in this video.
@@SarruhTonin why would the person choose substances if they're being loved and looked after? There are people who prefer drugs anyway, but the majority of users do so because they feel neglected, or because it helps them to stave off symptoms in the short term which are worse in effect than the drugs - through compassion for those around them. When they comply with the requests to reduce their intake then the symptoms return and are aggravated in the short term by the withdrawal. That's fine if the people they live with are going to take care of them, but if they refuse then what choice does the person have? If they need to sort out somewhere else to live, they can't do that if their symptoms are playing up and they are suffering withdrawals. And even if someone stinks of beer, and steals money, that doesn't mean that they've actually been drinking - it's essential to trust them, despite their previous behaviour. Most importantly it's important to encourage them to get regular blood tests and to consult with medical professionals. Encouraging them to share their feelings, and not showing any disdain when they're being honest, goes a long way towards helping their recovery. Gentle pressure is fine, but continuous pressure causes an undue reaction and can exacerbate the problem.
Thank you, I am feeling better now, but I always come back to these tips when I fall back into a difficult place. They're inevitable, but it's all about how we handle them that matters. Lolita helps, too 🥰
Sending love and support. Grateful for this content ❤
Much much appreciated 😊
Sarah, I really need this right now. I hope that I am just readjusting since retirement. I just want to stay home and lie around. You are reminding me of many practices that I once did and had since forgotten. Your timing couldn’t be better for me. I know that many others will benefit from your videos. This is such a selfless act. Thank you.
I’m sorry you’ve been having a tough time - I spent much of my 20’s wanting to just stay home and lie around! Transitioning to retirement must be strange, but I hope you can find some hobbies and interests that really speak to you or some other way to make your free time more satisfying. Maybe volunteering somewhere?
I appreciate you saying that, but this channel benefits me too. It’s a lot of work, but it brings me a lot of joy, so it’s not totally selfless 😋
I have to commend you for being able to get through the video even though you weren't feeling well! You are inspiring for sure. Thanks again!
Thank you! When I watch this video now, I can instantly hear in my voice how down I was at the time. The microphone cutting out was just the icing on the cake. I love how it turned out though - it was a great representation of the topic at hand. I really like the videos like this that I make at a time when I need the reminder myself. I obviously make content on stuff I’ve already learned and practiced and believe in, but it’s still helpful for me to watch these. I’m glad it is for you as well!!
This vid is Everything. So real and open. So great to connect with the hurt/depressed part of you as well as model the self compassion and pushing through so self sabotage doesn’t occur. You are inspiring ❤️
Thank you!! We can’t always avoid suffering, but a lack of self compassion adds another thick layer to it. Often, the only way out is through! No need to make hard times worse by feeling bad about feeling bad. And like you said, having that compassion also makes it easier to resist self sabotage and unhealthy coping mechanisms.
self compassion and giving myself credit are SO HARD for me. I struggle not to equate my value with my productivity. When I try to take a mental health day or relax, the guilt and shame eat at me. I've been looking into shadow work and learning how to re-parent the parts of my former self that need healing, but the positive self talk can sound delusional, which is bizarre, since the negative self talk lands so naturally. Number five is the key for me and reminds me there's hope. Reminding myself that I am capable, scrappy, and smart. I have done difficult things and I can and will do them again. Thanks for another great vid
Thank you so much for sharing - I completely feel for you! I’d highly recommend “The Self-Talk Workout” by Rachel Goldsmith Turow to help with the self talk aspect. That’s where the breathing exercise I’m planning on discussing next comes from, and there’s a few other things from that book I want to make videos about. It won’t help with the deeper aspects of the shadow/inner-child work, but I think you’d find it very helpful especially alongside that work.
@@SarruhTonin Ooh! I just found the audiobook for self talk workout on my libby app, thank you!
@@kvispisianoplease let me know what you think! I was going to do a full “book report” video for it, but even my outline ended up being 10 pages long 😅 But I’m definitely planning on giving some of the strategies/concepts their own videos.
Thank you for sharing this raw version of yourself! It definitely gives me confidence to be more open with myself and others. All of your hard work and dedication towards your channel/ the content you provide is genuinely appreciated. It’s really helpful towards my mental health and daily struggles. 🙏💗
Aw thank you so much for your comment! It definitely takes work to move towards living more authentically, but it’s incredibly freeing. I hope you continue to find my content helpful ☺️
I think by reducing my association with BPD is helping and simply practicing good strategies that help with the same problems without the anxiety of thinking about my specific problems.
That’s why I try to stress that the topics I talk about on this channel that aren’t BPD specific still contribute to my overall recovery. A lot of symptoms are just amplified emotional and behavioral responses to common problems. Those strategies can help all sorts of people in different situations. I’m glad you’ve found a more helpful way of looking at it for yourself 😊
this is amazing, i just got dumped after a 5 year relationship, all your tips are so helpful especially tip #5. new subscriber! ❤ i love how you film in the sad spot btw. very relatable and real. and youre really pretty btw
Thank you so much!! I’m really sorry to hear about your breakup 😔 Heartbreak suuuucks, but you will get through this and be better for it. I’m so glad you found this video helpful, and I deeply appreciate the kind words!
@@SarruhTonin Thank you so much💗💗💗
No one has the right to go above and beyond to try and make my life as impossible and stressful as humanly possible. I don’t people making life harder than it needs to be
Im sorry you’re feeling that way because of someone else. I hope you can create distance or at least boundaries with them if possible, and that you find a way to take care of yourself and control what you can so you can lessen the effects.
This comment is a bit disjointed. It’s a combo of my notes on the video plus some reflections. It’s imperfect but I going to share it without further edits.
Hey what’s up, it’s nice to see you again too.
Cool, the magic snap worked. And apparently being near the floor helps too. Appreciation for Sarruh’s Sad Spot.
Self compassion. This is a timely reminder for me to return to studying the mindful self compassion workbook.
You said Self compassion is not lying. I will add that self compassion is not easy or automatic. At least not at first.
Sorry your brain ain’t right right now. (Or then)
“Be unto yourself as you would onto others.”
Basics. Sleep diet and movement.
It’s difficult for me to get consistent sleep.
Sleep hygiene.
I can improve my sleep.
Gonna try to use Headspace.
Do eat. With nutritional value.
Movement, because it’s a less intense word than exercise.
Something is better than nothing. Baby steps still count.
Bonus points for nature and medicine. This one is hard for me. I’m a city mouse and am I door cat.
Three. Resist drugs and alcohol. Negative effects. Escape and avoidance. Sobriety.
Four. Take it easy and give yourself credit.
How can I focus of simply sleeping and eating and moving when I have so many bigger things to worry about??
Build your foundation first.
Not doing as much as you’d want.
Do more it want less.
Give yourself credit for any of your successes.
Believe.
Corny but essential.
Believe in yourself
Corey Wilks talk about limiting self beliefs. How about expanding self beliefs?
This really made me smile. It’s so nice to know people are really paying attention and taking in the messages of my videos - especially with the TikTok effect on attention spans. I appreciate and agree with your additional input as well. I look forward to hearing what you think of my other videos as you watch them! Thanks always for the support 😊
@@SarruhTonin Attention is so often fractured, but every so often, someone wakes up and pays attention to something.
Oops, lol, I didn't mean to comment as "@@your-random-friyay-moment".
resisting drugs and alcohol can cause depression and all sorts of things. everyone rants on at that person to stop drinking but then when they do they get excluded because of the side effects of the withdrawal. so they need a safe place where they can be sure that they won't get chucked out, and not have someone harping on at them. so for partners and family members, if you want that person to stop bad habits you have to accept them for who they are in the first instance, and then give them space where they can make their own choices. give them alternatives, not just once but all day every day.
When resisting drugs and alcohol causes depression and other issues, it’s because the substances themselves are causing or masking issues - not because they are inherently healthy. So I do still suggest someone resist those substances to not worsen a difficult situation by using them as a coping mechanism. If someone has a serious addiction, yes, tackling it must be done carefully. I’m not making any suggestions about how family members or loved ones should support people in this video.
@@SarruhTonin why would the person choose substances if they're being loved and looked after? There are people who prefer drugs anyway, but the majority of users do so because they feel neglected, or because it helps them to stave off symptoms in the short term which are worse in effect than the drugs - through compassion for those around them. When they comply with the requests to reduce their intake then the symptoms return and are aggravated in the short term by the withdrawal. That's fine if the people they live with are going to take care of them, but if they refuse then what choice does the person have? If they need to sort out somewhere else to live, they can't do that if their symptoms are playing up and they are suffering withdrawals. And even if someone stinks of beer, and steals money, that doesn't mean that they've actually been drinking - it's essential to trust them, despite their previous behaviour. Most importantly it's important to encourage them to get regular blood tests and to consult with medical professionals. Encouraging them to share their feelings, and not showing any disdain when they're being honest, goes a long way towards helping their recovery. Gentle pressure is fine, but continuous pressure causes an undue reaction and can exacerbate the problem.
Hope u feel better..nice kitty
Thank you, I am feeling better now, but I always come back to these tips when I fall back into a difficult place. They're inevitable, but it's all about how we handle them that matters. Lolita helps, too 🥰
Love a good sad spot 🤌🏻 thank you ❤
Thank YOU! ☺️