➡Download your free mp3 guide to doing IFS on yourself: seekdeeply.com/free ➡Apply to my IFS mastermind, where you get my 1-on-1 support for doing solo IFS: seekdeeply.com/mastermind ➡Book an initial consultation for 1-on-1 therapy with me here: seekdeeply.com/therapy
Parts arise in Self, Self is the canvas, not the paint, so of course you are in self all the time. Your parts have decided that Self is another part. It’s not. Parts are essential yes, but Self never goes away, it’s just occluded by whatever is arising in your experience. That’s why your inner compass is available… parts are never alone.
Yup, in the IFS framework Self and Parts are fundamentally different. Self-energy is always available but Parts have to be willing to make space for Self. Hot tip: telling other people about their own parts ("Your parts have decided...") can get into cult-like shaming patterns. Have you seen my video on this topic? ruclips.net/video/Dyri-NnOvjI/видео.html&lc=UgzgjXW9B4ND6iNiCKF4AaABAg
Good point. Self is the background, the container for all, the movie screen for all the characters, the ocean out of which all waves arise, the clay from which the pot is cast, the Big Sky Mind, the Sun hidden behind the clouds, everpresent everywhere, etc. The Self isn't just a 'nice' person, it's the ground of being, the formless out of which all forms emerge and disappear. Dick Schwartz had an 'aha' moment on meeting Loch Kelly, who seems to have helped him with this. I love human potential and healing etc, but it's frame of reference, or prevailing myth, tends to be that of being a seperate individual, which we are of course but not only, or fundamentally. How to awaken out of this dream state is another matter. Anyway, enjoyed your thoughtful reflections and critiques Lucille.
Yesss... "I am every woman" *Chaka Kahn (and sometimes every man too)😅 I am a girl, a teenager, a woman, a lover, a mother AND a grandmother too..😊 My body behaves mostly as "the old woman" now.😅 Although I play a masculine kind of woman character in general , my lover"me" does not carry 'burdens' of that role or of my mother"me" for example. Being a boy- ish kind of woman I can carry 'burdens' that my girly 'me' might not have . I totally agree there is no need to ask a part how to calm them or what they call themselves . We are born with NO name, we were given one. And even that we can change too. So many people have done that. And the Self is in my opinion the observer and the director of the roles AND the Play of our lives, yet it must not forget that it is NOT the role(s) itself.😅 Maybe that is meant by blending ? And I feel sorry for those who have been diagnosed with multi personality "disorder" and got too much medicated for it . All they need is (in my opinion) help to find in themselves, the Director of their Play or in other words, the Original Driver of their human body"Bus" again . Sometimes mine can be very lost too😔 Yet isn't it fascinating to being able to be(come) anything we want to be, given the "right" direction and tools? 😊
Thank you for these videos. I am very new to IFS, and just starting my healing journey using this model. Watching these videos helped me to see potential pitfalls. I could see I was already going down a couple of these paths. And your videos help me to shift some key assumptions so I can get to true healing. I also love the metaphor of the maps. I have at least three or four other healing modalities for C-PTSD that I use in my healing, and they all play an important part at different times in this journey. Thank you again.
I recently received my LAC license (looking for a job now), and both of your myth-busting videos have been incredibly helpful. They really set me at ease about applying it in the counseling room. I was so rigid about the naming of parts and following the "rules/formula." 😅
Super info! This is answering a bunch of things I've been asking myself since finding IFS. I was somewhat happy shocked what you said about not being Self
Glad it was helpful! Agreed, that's a BIG myth to bust. And the implications are massive, too. We don't need to strive to constantly be our "best" selves (aka Self)
Thank you for examing some common myths about IFS. The one about needing to be in Self all the time is very helpful, as it creates a lot of unrealistic expectations and even risks the emergence of an inauthentic Self-like part. However, I would have appreciated greater clarity about the origin of these myths. At times I was left wondering if they are misconceptions that have crept in because people not well versed in IFS have misunderstood the model, or whether the IFS model itself contains or promotes these myths.
Good question! IFS doesn't explicitly provide guidance on most of these topics so individuals have naturally filled in the blanks. As a result, these myths are found in all levels of IFS, from learners to actual IFS therapists and get perpetuated. Unfortunately there is not yet much public critical thinking around IFS!
Great content and unique. Thank you for that. This very morning I listened to a podcast with Ms. Tammy where you dicuss these myth and behold - new video ;). If only your mastermind class was not so prohibitively expensive… It is equiv. of 6 months of wages in the Czech Republic (Central Europe)
So nice to meet you, and voila - what great timing. Yow that's expensive. I'm working on an exciting offering that'll be more in your price range, something I'm thrilled to release. In the meantime, have you joined my list? seekdeeply.com/ You'll get free solo IFS resources. Plus, direct attention from me anytime you're one of the first commenters on a blog post. Thanks for taking the time to comment!
@@healwithlucilleI am monitoring your web page, looking forward to what you will prepare. What I have seen and heard from younso far is indeed great and - for lack of better words - refreshing, bringing new angles and ideas to otherwise often repeated general overview of IFS
Thanks for the video.I appreciate your content. How do you know its not possible to always be in pure self? Is it possible that it is achievable and takes a tremendous amount of work? Additionaly, I imagine that IFS would say to you that the behind your doubts in IFS theres a part of you thats scared or protecting you in some way. As I'm sure your well aware of this, how did you climb out of this trap and give yourself permission to question it? In other words: How can one ever truly say IFS isn't working for me?whenever one feels that way, IFS would say that this is a part that needs to be worked with and I should see it as a protector and not quit. To quit IFS means you never realy followed the process your just quiting in middle.
Good, important questions! Self-trust. We have to centre ourselves rather than any model. Many models (like cults) can lead to a never-ending vortex of demonstrating we are wrong. But there's a deeper knowing. Something beyond any model. I call it the inner compass. We need to know it's there, and observe for ourselves what happens when we orient to it.
➡Download your free mp3 guide to doing IFS on yourself: seekdeeply.com/free
➡Apply to my IFS mastermind, where you get my 1-on-1 support for doing solo IFS: seekdeeply.com/mastermind
➡Book an initial consultation for 1-on-1 therapy with me here: seekdeeply.com/therapy
Parts arise in Self, Self is the canvas, not the paint, so of course you are in self all the time. Your parts have decided that Self is another part. It’s not. Parts are essential yes, but Self never goes away, it’s just occluded by whatever is arising in your experience. That’s why your inner compass is available… parts are never alone.
Yup, in the IFS framework Self and Parts are fundamentally different. Self-energy is always available but Parts have to be willing to make space for Self. Hot tip: telling other people about their own parts ("Your parts have decided...") can get into cult-like shaming patterns. Have you seen my video on this topic? ruclips.net/video/Dyri-NnOvjI/видео.html&lc=UgzgjXW9B4ND6iNiCKF4AaABAg
Good point. Self is the background, the container for all, the movie screen for all the characters, the ocean out of which all waves arise, the clay from which the pot is cast, the Big Sky Mind, the Sun hidden behind the clouds, everpresent everywhere, etc. The Self isn't just a 'nice' person, it's the ground of being, the formless out of which all forms emerge and disappear.
Dick Schwartz had an 'aha' moment on meeting Loch Kelly, who seems to have helped him with this. I love human potential and healing etc, but it's frame of reference, or prevailing myth, tends to be that of being a seperate individual, which we are of course but not only, or fundamentally. How to awaken out of this dream state is another matter. Anyway, enjoyed your thoughtful reflections and critiques Lucille.
Yesss... "I am every woman" *Chaka Kahn (and sometimes every man too)😅 I am a girl, a teenager, a woman, a lover, a mother AND a grandmother too..😊 My body behaves mostly as "the old woman" now.😅 Although I play a masculine kind of woman character in general , my lover"me" does not carry 'burdens' of that role or of my mother"me" for example.
Being a boy- ish kind of woman I can carry 'burdens' that my girly 'me' might not have .
I totally agree there is no need to ask a part how to calm them or what they call themselves . We are born with NO name, we were given one. And even that we can change too. So many people have done that.
And the Self is in my opinion the observer and the director of the roles AND the Play of our lives, yet it must not forget that it is NOT the role(s) itself.😅 Maybe that is meant by blending ?
And I feel sorry for those who have been diagnosed with multi personality "disorder" and got too much medicated for it . All they need is (in my opinion) help to find in themselves, the Director of their Play or in other words, the Original Driver of their human body"Bus" again . Sometimes mine can be very lost too😔 Yet isn't it fascinating to being able to be(come) anything we want to be, given the "right" direction and tools? 😊
Thank you for these videos. I am very new to IFS, and just starting my healing journey using this model. Watching these videos helped me to see potential pitfalls. I could see I was already going down a couple of these paths. And your videos help me to shift some key assumptions so I can get to true healing. I also love the metaphor of the maps. I have at least three or four other healing modalities for C-PTSD that I use in my healing, and they all play an important part at different times in this journey. Thank you again.
You're welcome! Love that the maps metaphor is so helpful
You give me so much confidence, through your naming out loud all my own concerns and disquiet ❤
Thank you for sharing!
I recently received my LAC license (looking for a job now), and both of your myth-busting videos have been incredibly helpful.
They really set me at ease about applying it in the counseling room. I was so rigid about the naming of parts and following the "rules/formula." 😅
So glad to hear that! Yes, you can hold the naming as a helpful tool ... and have the freedom to use it WHEN helpful (and not other times)
Super info! This is answering a bunch of things I've been asking myself since finding IFS. I was somewhat happy shocked what you said about not being Self
Glad it was helpful! Agreed, that's a BIG myth to bust. And the implications are massive, too. We don't need to strive to constantly be our "best" selves (aka Self)
Thank you for examing some common myths about IFS. The one about needing to be in Self all the time is very helpful, as it creates a lot of unrealistic expectations and even risks the emergence of an inauthentic Self-like part. However, I would have appreciated greater clarity about the origin of these myths. At times I was left wondering if they are misconceptions that have crept in because people not well versed in IFS have misunderstood the model, or whether the IFS model itself contains or promotes these myths.
Good question! IFS doesn't explicitly provide guidance on most of these topics so individuals have naturally filled in the blanks. As a result, these myths are found in all levels of IFS, from learners to actual IFS therapists and get perpetuated. Unfortunately there is not yet much public critical thinking around IFS!
Thanks for answering, it's clearer now where they may come from.
Great content and unique. Thank you for that. This very morning I listened to a podcast with Ms. Tammy where you dicuss these myth and behold - new video ;). If only your mastermind class was not so prohibitively expensive… It is equiv. of 6 months of wages in the Czech Republic (Central Europe)
So nice to meet you, and voila - what great timing. Yow that's expensive. I'm working on an exciting offering that'll be more in your price range, something I'm thrilled to release. In the meantime, have you joined my list? seekdeeply.com/ You'll get free solo IFS resources. Plus, direct attention from me anytime you're one of the first commenters on a blog post. Thanks for taking the time to comment!
@@healwithlucilleI am monitoring your web page, looking forward to what you will prepare. What I have seen and heard from younso far is indeed great and - for lack of better words - refreshing, bringing new angles and ideas to otherwise often repeated general overview of IFS
@@manncz what a compliment. I might print your comment out! Thank you 🙏🏽
So much clarity! My kinda gal!!
Yass! That's the goal 🙌🏾
Thanks for the video.I appreciate your content.
How do you know its not possible to always be in pure self?
Is it possible that it is achievable and takes a tremendous amount of work?
Additionaly, I imagine that IFS would say to you that the behind your doubts in IFS theres a part of you thats scared or protecting you in some way.
As I'm sure your well aware of this, how did you climb out of this trap and give yourself permission to question it?
In other words:
How can one ever truly say IFS isn't working for me?whenever one feels that way, IFS would say that this is a part that needs to be worked with and I should see it as a protector and not quit. To quit IFS means you never realy followed the process your just quiting in middle.
Good, important questions! Self-trust. We have to centre ourselves rather than any model. Many models (like cults) can lead to a never-ending vortex of demonstrating we are wrong. But there's a deeper knowing. Something beyond any model. I call it the inner compass. We need to know it's there, and observe for ourselves what happens when we orient to it.