HI! You really hit the nail on the head with the descriptions you proposed! I've been contemplating my own situation in search of a verbal something that fits where I actually am, and you revealed the terminology for me. I went on HRT long ago, & in the last several years have seriously gone into surgical steps of transition, yet I feel the same as you. I spent decades as male with a portion of myself incognito. No more of that at this point. ...but old mannerisms remain as part of my persona and can't be erased. I'm still the same person. I just have become much more feminine in my appearance now... and I am comfortable with that. Some day, I'm doggin' it, some days I have to glam it up. Just depends on the mood & the venue! Thanks.
Outstanding video. You did a wonderful job explaining this. Keep up producing your great content. 💜 I am trans woman, but so fluid it gets dizzying at times.
I am a “transgerder” female in my 70s as well. Do you or any other trans women in their 70s or beyond belong to a support group for us on RUclips or elsewhere?
After about 79 years with OCD that I didn’t know I had or even what OCD was I found out it was due to gender dysphoria. I had kept everything to myself. So what to do as I’m now 80. I realize I am female inside and always have been. So I hope to start HRT very soon and my therapist has recommended it. What’s next, I’m not sure? I might add I told my family and they are very supportive.
Perfectly explained. I'm AMAB, identify female, expression is mostly feminine, but perception floats a bit. Mostly perceived as female, but voice and my size will sometimes get people thinking I'm a feminine male.
Thank you for your point of view. I think it maybe potentially be good to start most people off with simpler descriptions like yours. Im non-binary and transandrogynous i think. To me on gender and sex there is (probably atleast mainly) the following: _ "Biology" biological(so to speak) sex characteristics over your entire lifetime. Best split into 1-2(-3?) main times: before any transitioning and after transitioning (if applicable): - So this is chromosomes, genitalia (both since birth and any new genitalia. Of course can get quite detailed), hormone levels, other physical attributes like height, weight, width, skin texture even?, hair, etc. _ Psychological gender (both your own and others): - How you feel deep inside (can be unrecognised and very multifaceted) about what body you want for yourself regardless of other people. - How you identify (can very multifaceted) such as someone identifying as: "I'm an intersex biologically-transandrogynous non-binary genderfluid masculine leaning person". - How you present so like what clothing you wear, makeup, (i would potentially put pronouns in this category), name, - How you want others to see you again multifaceted. _ Sexuality. Very complicated. there is both romantic attraction and sexual attraction for most people: - What "gender/genders" or "role/roles" you would like in the bedroom (these two can be non-heteronormative too each other for example: a cisgender woman who dominates in the bedroom and uses toys to be the "penetrator") - How you want to present - Who you want to have intimate activities with (men, women, non-binaries, transpeople, females, males, etc) - Who you want romantic relationships with - probably a whole lot more things. And sexuality does play into Gender.
Hey Claire, That scale that you presented looks very similar to a thing we use on our works training course and we explain things in a similar manner. Though makeup is a given (I have many more years of electrolysis before I can go without makeup). Yet again you hit the nail on the head :) Love and Hugs. Mel xx
This video should be viewed by all doubters, who are open minded enough to understand us and maybe even those, who are not. You state the obvious so succinctly that even I as a trans woman gained from it and I will use it with those to whom I have to come out. Maybe even with the haters, who might listen with a semi-open mind. I should carry a flip chart under my dress as a visual aid. Thank you from myself and on behalf of all other trans people. You are gifted in your intellectual ability to explain this burden we TGs bear. You go girl.
You always brighten my day! Great video! Helped me a lot knowing you are gender fluid because that is how I feel. You are transfeminine and that is also how I identify although I am perceived as male and I choose to dress more androgenous. I feel like you perfectly gave me permission to be ME! (not that I needed it) Thank you again! I have to say I appreciate your brutally honest approach to everything.
it's not lost on cisgender people, it's just not deemed necessary to obsessively observe, monitor and categorize every single behaviour as "masculine" or "feminine", unless you're insecure and try to suppress (i.e. a man feeling scared and self conscious about appearing "feminine")
I also identify as genderfluid. Male assigned at birth. When I first came into contact with that topic I thought I was trans but I never really fitted into that label. I would rather be a woman but I am only slightly dysphoric when it comes to a few certain topics, I most of the time don't really mind being read as male and having male features (I am out to my family and close friends but not publicly). He/she/they are all fine for me. That is the reason why I did not feel really valid because there are so many trans folks out there who deep down always knew that they were trans and really suffer from major dysphoria. Both not applying to me somehow felt like it was not "real". So calling myself genderfluid/nonbinary just enables me to be whatever the hell I feel like.
Well, Claire did a very good job here explaining the gender awareness understood as "far left" by so many. The slider scale cards are an awesome visual representation that works very well. The problem I see is in communication and definitions by all sides of these discussions or arguments, not so much in ill percieved "phobias" or hate. Most people sre centrists and just don't care how others live their lives. The vocabulary seems to be the biggest problem with trying to explain all this. I believe we need to make better connections between biological fact and humanity's spiritual awareness of gender and be able to relate our understandings in more logical vocabulary.
That's a great way too put it! Here is my scale. Birth: male Identity: female Expression: 80% fem & 20% male Perception: fem 70% My problem is my voice & I would love to take lessons from you. As always, lots of love.
I lived too many decades wearing a male persona and gender(though it came to nearly kill me with dysphoria) with a largely great life and successful role as “father” to completely discard it into a binary expression. I look at it like life stages and I have morphed from one way of expressing to another without a binary commitment. When I watched your video I felt a kind of calm. Things have sooo changed since I was pushed into Levi’s and out of dresses in 1962 and institutionalized for crossdressing in 1971. Scared straight on the outside. No more fear, at 63, I will live out my days as femme as I and my thirty year partner no longer feel any constraints on our mutual queerness Blessings for sharing your happy life. It truly makes the troubles some have seen worth it in so many ways. 💜💜💐💐🤗💗
i'm not really feeling the gender fluid thing myself. if i experience the genders it's all at once and not from 1 to another. i suspect i might be transgender mtf though. i want to talk to my doctor about it.
well here it goes... you asked for it. 🤪 i am a transgender woman, i express myself femme all the time but i am also nonbinary. my gender is fluid between femme and agender but never masculine. most of my friends and chosen family perceive my as femme all the time but occasionally they can tell i ve gone nonbinary. this is why my pronouns are she/they (technically she/her/hers and sometimes they/them theirs).
Yeah, this is interesting for me. I want to present as female, absolutely, no doubt. I have trouble saying I'm a man or a woman but woman feels easier to hear. I'm not fluid because I don't want to look or present masculine at any time. The other thing is that pronouns don't bother me, at all. He/she/it, I really don't care... So I think I struggle with the concept of gender? It doesn't stress me too much if I'm honest, be nice to have a clean simple description when explaining to others though 😆
Love your videos, love you. I'm no longer sure what is considered masculine and what is feminine. Is there a generally accepted definition? When I was young (seems like around the time of the dinosaurs) boys played with action figures and girls played with dolls. boys who played with dolls were "sissies" and girls who liked action figures were "tomboys". I never understood why there was a difference, technically action figures and dolls are the same thing. Seems like the older I get the more confused I become.
Here you are. Or here I am: AMAB, not identifying as any gender and deaing with some level of body dysphoria (medicated), expressing mostly masculine, although I like to wear clothes that have both men's and women's variants (so I'd say I oscilate in the middle of that scale), and perceived as a man (as I'm almost totally closeted).
Cheeky question-should you revise your self-labeling to be “supergender” having transcended beyond the binary? Well done. I very much enjoyed your thoughts.
I'm amab, identifying as boy (I dont really like the word man) with quite feminine gender expression and perception. I like the term femboy, it fits me very well.^^
I think most people do this but those who are transgender we realize this a lot easier most can't put together the words you just put together to explain that so a lot of people feel the same way but just don't understand the mechanics of it
I don't know if calling trans "the third gender is" accurate and might cause some confusion in later discourse. Great video otherwise as it's addressed something I've been noticing and commenting about as I go through my own transition. How moving from one binary identity to the the other seemed straight forward until I I started actually transitioning. Now I only have more questions. 😆
Stopping at the 6 min mark to comment: Your initial comment about 'feeling/expressing a more masculine or more feminine' side is, if you wish, an expression, a presentation, but NO ONE would take you for male (in this video or anywhere else!) regardless of your action because, at the foundation, you are a woman. That perception exists because we as a species recognize gender even when sex is difficult to discern. For those that do not pass, their expression and perception doesn't really change at the foundation who they are and what gender they are. I accept that there are non-binary people, though honestly, not lots of them. And my opinion is that post GCS, we are no longer transgender (or transsexual) because we have completed the journey. I don't think of you as trans. I think of you as a woman. My perception of you.
You’re “transplaining” again. Just who are you trying to convince about all this gender confusion? You’re fem, you’re masc, you’re fluid, transgender, not transgender, third gender, trans fem, amab. I honestly wish you nothing but happiness in your life. But, all your new-agey gendersplaining sounds to me like you’re trying desperately to convince yourself of the nonsense you spout sooooo eagerly. This might make sense to you, but most people can’t understand what you experience, and they shouldn’t even try. And I say this as a gay man myself.
![Seungmin "그렇게, 천천히, 우리(As we are)" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/kAzmhLHePqU/mqdefault.jpg)
![I.N "HALLUCINATION" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/n5B5q1Hwt_U/mqdefault.jpg)
HI! You really hit the nail on the head with the descriptions you proposed! I've been contemplating my own situation in search of a verbal something that fits where I actually am, and you revealed the terminology for me.
I went on HRT long ago, & in the last several years have seriously gone into surgical steps of transition, yet I feel the same as you.
I spent decades as male with a portion of myself incognito.
No more of that at this point. ...but old mannerisms remain as part of my persona and can't be erased. I'm still the same person. I just have become much more feminine in my appearance now... and I am comfortable with that. Some day, I'm doggin' it, some days I have to glam it up.
Just depends on the mood & the venue! Thanks.
Outstanding video. You did a wonderful job explaining this. Keep up producing your great content. 💜
I am trans woman, but so fluid it gets dizzying at times.
Hi, I really like your videos, I really do! I'm a transgerder female in my 70s. You go girl!!!
I am a “transgerder” female in my 70s as well. Do you or any other trans women in their 70s or beyond belong to a support group for us on RUclips or elsewhere?
After about 79 years with OCD that I didn’t know I had or even what OCD was I found out it was due to gender dysphoria. I had kept everything to myself. So what to do as I’m now 80. I realize I am female inside and always have been. So I hope to start HRT very soon and my therapist has recommended it. What’s next, I’m not sure? I might add I told my family and they are very supportive.
Very good summary! Great content on your channel!
Perfectly explained. I'm AMAB, identify female, expression is mostly feminine, but perception floats a bit. Mostly perceived as female, but voice and my size will sometimes get people thinking I'm a feminine male.
Thank you for your point of view.
I think it maybe potentially be good to start most people off with simpler descriptions like yours.
Im non-binary and transandrogynous i think.
To me on gender and sex there is (probably atleast mainly) the following:
_ "Biology" biological(so to speak) sex characteristics over your entire lifetime. Best split into 1-2(-3?) main times: before any transitioning
and after transitioning (if applicable):
- So this is chromosomes,
genitalia (both since birth and any new genitalia. Of course can get quite detailed),
hormone levels,
other physical attributes like height, weight, width, skin texture even?, hair, etc.
_ Psychological gender (both your own and others):
- How you feel deep inside
(can be unrecognised and very multifaceted)
about what body you want for yourself regardless of other people.
- How you identify (can very multifaceted) such as someone identifying as:
"I'm an intersex biologically-transandrogynous non-binary genderfluid masculine leaning person".
- How you present so like what clothing you wear, makeup, (i would potentially put pronouns in this category), name,
- How you want others to see you again multifaceted.
_ Sexuality. Very complicated. there is both romantic attraction and sexual attraction for most people:
- What "gender/genders" or "role/roles" you would like in the bedroom (these two can be non-heteronormative too each other for example: a cisgender woman who dominates in the bedroom and uses toys to be the "penetrator")
- How you want to present
- Who you want to have intimate activities with (men, women, non-binaries, transpeople, females, males, etc)
- Who you want romantic relationships with
- probably a whole lot more things.
And sexuality does play into Gender.
Hey Claire,
That scale that you presented looks very similar to a thing we use on our works training course and we explain things in a similar manner. Though makeup is a given (I have many more years of electrolysis before I can go without makeup).
Yet again you hit the nail on the head :)
Love and Hugs. Mel xx
When i first came out i taught i was a trans woman but now i feel nb . For us gendernauts this journey is wonderful if we are allowed to fly ❤
gendernauts love it!
This video should be viewed by all doubters, who are open minded enough to understand us and maybe even those, who are not. You state the obvious so succinctly that even I as a trans woman gained from it and I will use it with those to whom I have to come out. Maybe even with the haters, who might listen with a semi-open mind. I should carry a flip chart under my dress as a visual aid. Thank you from myself and on behalf of all other trans people. You are gifted in your intellectual ability to explain this burden we TGs bear. You go girl.
You always brighten my day! Great video! Helped me a lot knowing you are gender fluid because that is how I feel. You are transfeminine and that is also how I identify although I am perceived as male and I choose to dress more androgenous. I feel like you perfectly gave me permission to be ME! (not that I needed it) Thank you again! I have to say I appreciate your brutally honest approach to everything.
I’m a transgender woman and I really believe you hit that nail on the head. Thank you I really enjoy your videos. 💕
it's not lost on cisgender people, it's just not deemed necessary to obsessively observe, monitor and categorize every single behaviour as "masculine" or "feminine", unless you're insecure and try to suppress (i.e. a man feeling scared and self conscious about appearing "feminine")
This was very informative thank you!
I also identify as genderfluid. Male assigned at birth. When I first came into contact with that topic I thought I was trans but I never really fitted into that label. I would rather be a woman but I am only slightly dysphoric when it comes to a few certain topics, I most of the time don't really mind being read as male and having male features (I am out to my family and close friends but not publicly). He/she/they are all fine for me. That is the reason why I did not feel really valid because there are so many trans folks out there who deep down always knew that they were trans and really suffer from major dysphoria. Both not applying to me somehow felt like it was not "real".
So calling myself genderfluid/nonbinary just enables me to be whatever the hell I feel like.
Well, Claire did a very good job here explaining the gender awareness understood as "far left" by so many. The slider scale cards are an awesome visual representation that works very well. The problem I see is in communication and definitions by all sides of these discussions or arguments, not so much in ill percieved "phobias" or hate. Most people sre centrists and just don't care how others live their lives. The vocabulary seems to be the biggest problem with trying to explain all this. I believe we need to make better connections between biological fact and humanity's spiritual awareness of gender and be able to relate our understandings in more logical vocabulary.
That's a great way too put it!
Here is my scale.
Birth: male
Identity: female
Expression: 80% fem & 20% male
Perception: fem 70%
My problem is my voice & I would love to take lessons from you.
As always, lots of love.
I lived too many decades wearing a male persona and gender(though it came to nearly kill me with dysphoria) with a largely great life and successful role as “father” to completely discard it into a binary expression. I look at it like life stages and I have morphed from one way of expressing to another without a binary commitment.
When I watched your video I felt a kind of calm. Things have sooo changed since I was pushed into Levi’s and out of dresses in 1962 and institutionalized for crossdressing in 1971. Scared straight on the outside. No more fear, at 63, I will live out my days as femme as I and my thirty year partner no longer feel any constraints on our mutual queerness
Blessings for sharing your happy life. It truly makes the troubles some have seen worth it in so many ways. 💜💜💐💐🤗💗
I identify the same way...
great to hear how well you know yourself.
and how honest you are, great.
This was so good. thanks
i'm not really feeling the gender fluid thing myself. if i experience the genders it's all at once and not from 1 to another. i suspect i might be transgender mtf though. i want to talk to my doctor about it.
well here it goes... you asked for it. 🤪
i am a transgender woman, i express myself femme all the time but i am also nonbinary. my gender is fluid between femme and agender but never masculine. most of my friends and chosen family perceive my as femme all the time but occasionally they can tell i ve gone nonbinary. this is why my pronouns are she/they (technically she/her/hers and sometimes they/them theirs).
Yeah, this is interesting for me. I want to present as female, absolutely, no doubt. I have trouble saying I'm a man or a woman but woman feels easier to hear. I'm not fluid because I don't want to look or present masculine at any time. The other thing is that pronouns don't bother me, at all. He/she/it, I really don't care... So I think I struggle with the concept of gender? It doesn't stress me too much if I'm honest, be nice to have a clean simple description when explaining to others though 😆
Love your videos, love you. I'm no longer sure what is considered masculine and what is feminine. Is there a generally accepted definition? When I was young (seems like around the time of the dinosaurs) boys played with action figures and girls played with dolls. boys who played with dolls were "sissies" and girls who liked action figures were "tomboys". I never understood why there was a difference, technically action figures and dolls are the same thing. Seems like the older I get the more confused I become.
Good to see you doing so well..
Please tell me that-
If person sometimes feels and behaves like a man sometimes like a woman, is that person really a transgender or fake.
Here you are.
Or here I am: AMAB, not identifying as any gender and deaing with some level of body dysphoria (medicated), expressing mostly masculine, although I like to wear clothes that have both men's and women's variants (so I'd say I oscilate in the middle of that scale), and perceived as a man (as I'm almost totally closeted).
Great video - thx :)
💛💛💛
Cheeky question-should you revise your self-labeling to be “supergender” having transcended beyond the binary? Well done. I very much enjoyed your thoughts.
Très intéressante réflexion. Ton système de carton pourrait m'aider
I'm amab, identifying as boy (I dont really like the word man) with quite feminine gender expression and perception. I like the term femboy, it fits me very well.^^
Hyperbolic is corrext. Had to come see what u meant
Ahhh same!!
I think most people do this but those who are transgender we realize this a lot easier most can't put together the words you just put together to explain that so a lot of people feel the same way but just don't understand the mechanics of it
I don't know if calling trans "the third gender is" accurate and might cause some confusion in later discourse. Great video otherwise as it's addressed something I've been noticing and commenting about as I go through my own transition. How moving from one binary identity to the the other seemed straight forward until I I started actually transitioning. Now I only have more questions. 😆
Well said sir/ma'am! I've a male cat that thinks she's a lady.... she's my queen!
❤
Oh dear God!!
male female and fale... lol i failed nvm
Please don't call us cis we are just real girls no big deal.
Stopping at the 6 min mark to comment: Your initial comment about 'feeling/expressing a more masculine or more feminine' side is, if you wish, an expression, a presentation, but NO ONE would take you for male (in this video or anywhere else!) regardless of your action because, at the foundation, you are a woman. That perception exists because we as a species recognize gender even when sex is difficult to discern. For those that do not pass, their expression and perception doesn't really change at the foundation who they are and what gender they are. I accept that there are non-binary people, though honestly, not lots of them. And my opinion is that post GCS, we are no longer transgender (or transsexual) because we have completed the journey. I don't think of you as trans. I think of you as a woman. My perception of you.
You’re “transplaining” again. Just who are you trying to convince about all this gender confusion? You’re fem, you’re masc, you’re fluid, transgender, not transgender, third gender, trans fem, amab. I honestly wish you nothing but happiness in your life. But, all your new-agey gendersplaining sounds to me like you’re trying desperately to convince yourself of the nonsense you spout sooooo eagerly. This might make sense to you, but most people can’t understand what you experience, and they shouldn’t even try. And I say this as a gay man myself.