Aliens: *wipe out entire systems for fun and profit* We come in peace Humanity: *wages one-sided genocidal warfare in response to millions of lost lives and violent first contact* And you'll leave in pieces! Aliens: *surprised pikachu face*
To summarize most attempts to conquer humanity… Alien civilization: Alright filthy humans it’s time for you to- *Ninety percent of the military gets vaporized in a hail of lead and fire.* Humanity: *Just standing there smug with fifteen various degrees of weapons behind them.* So, peace talks? Alien civilization: P-Peace talks please.
"We would rather annihilate ourselves than submit to you." At first I thought this was pretty unrealistic. Then it hit me that this was exactly what I did when playing as a nuclear-capable nation when betrayed by a much larger nuclear-capable ally in a role playing game .
@@giarnovanzeijl399 yes since countries that include china and russia have dead man switches. its more or less an automatic choice, im almost certain the US has some sort of dead man switch too.
"We leveled your largest city in an attempt to offer you peace! PEACE!" Mister Alien, ya'll got a different definition of peace than we do. Let us respond in kind.
As far as I see it if they don’t win the war quickly enough we will take anything they leave behind and reverse engineer it. And in a state where our governments actually come together , we would become monsters
@@user-mu8ok5xf8d Humans will only unite if there is a greater treat to us than ourselves. If we don't know about such treat we will continue to continue fighting against ourselves
@@user-mu8ok5xf8d If aliens were to even win said wars, who's to say that the descendants of humans wouldn't seek revenge and progress in technology behind the scenes? Going by most stories, any alien encounter would be good for humanity as long it doesn't result in extinction.
The civ's in these stories are a joke. We do not want actual aliens to do anything harmful to us. Any real movement by an Alien force at this point in our development would wipe us out completely. It would be entirely up to them whether they wanted to let us live. Even reverse engineering would take much much longer than these stories say. It would be worse than trying to figure out an I-phone as a caveman. Our only hope is that any aliens who show up are peaceful or some sort of parody of themselves. That or they don't show up until we AT-LEAST figure out how to travel faster than light at will. Once we have a couple intergalactic spaceship equivalents we can talk about fighting aliens.
@@Merilirem Relatively to an alien race, we would be much quicker than them if they haven't had any change in their history for 400 000 years. We would likely suffer defeat at first if they don't wipe us out, we would slowly but surely start to be integrated into their society, their technology could with time and effort be retrieved and reverse engineered, sure it might take years, but it would still be feasible, reverse engineering is already taking place all over the world on smaller isolated scales, now imagine if all of humanity would focus their eyes on one single target, if even just one single individual would succeed, more would follow.
Aliens: show up with new tech. Humans: You look like you could use some liberty and freedom. Humans: Terra! Hell Yeah! Or to quote the great prophet Bert Gummer: "Broke into the wrong goll-darn rec room didn't you!?!?"
I didn't play too much Stelaris yet, but the closest aproximation of this would be that the empire forcibly spawned Khan at crisis level 10 in their own backyard no less, while also accidently uplifting humanity.
This story reminded me of Christopher Titus’ “Fifth Annual End Of The World tour” when he talks about giving the Middle East a television subscription to explain why they shouldn’t piss the USA off or they’ll see what gets built next.
"The middle east" not any specific countries of course because why would an American ever want to know exactly who they're fighting, nope because one foreign brown person is quite like another right? Of you knew the name of the individual countries you were bombing you might start to see their citizens as human and we can't have that, your leaders need you frothing at the mouth to kill whoever they point fingers at next or their corporate lobbyists bottom line might take a hit.
I'm just going to say that humans taking over an entire galaxy is not surprising as it is implied that the aliens already had full control of multiple galaxy's
Aliens: BLOW UP A CITY AS FIRST CONTACT PROTOCOL Humans: Vaporize 27 out of 300 alien armadas (you know, exclusively 100% valid military targets) Aliens:"ThAt'S gEnOcIdE!"
@@shanerooney7288 I tend to prefer the deathworld descriptive tag that some stories place on earth. That to prevent panic, other governments limit any information about the human homeworld. The last thing they would need is to know that the friendly little human in the room next to theirs is nearly impossible to kill and is from a species capable of great feats even in the face of death.
I've seen some freaky stuff since I started watching these stories, but this has got to be the first one where humanity is so absolutely, ruthlessly overpowered that it's somewhere between laughable and WTF?!!!
It's not unrealistic though, humans tend to go overboard in every aspect. Why have a car that just is enough for the things you use it if you can also get one that's twice as strong? Why only make weapons that will work if you can make them long range hole punchers with enough force to level a building? Why only eat stuff that is enough to survive if you can have a feast? And to be fair, we humans are quite good at reverse engineering stuff :D The one word to describe humans: MORE
Alien invade: Human, start winning Aliens:No this isn't how the game is suppose to be play Watch this with the Red Alert 3 theme in the background its an experience like no other
Just remember that the tsar Bomba was the biggest bomb we have ever *detonated*. The Poseidons' wrath torpedoes that the Russians have supposedly have an explosive yield of 200mt.
Also, Tsar bomb actually was around 1.4 times weaker than it was INTENDED. The one in charge for bomb test and it's cores desided in last moment, that it would be boom to big to handle for Earth, and desided to unload one core off. It would be ~90Mtons, if not precaution.
Aliens: *Vaporizes our largest city*. "As you can see we are very powerful, so just bow down and we can start renovating the place." Humanity: Oh no, that's not how this works. Aliens: Wait what Humanity: See, you just started a fight with us. Aliens: no, we...we cowed you...so you'd surrender. Humanity: Oh, you sweet summer child. No, you attacked us, and we're still alive. *So now we're your problem until one of us quits breathing.* Aliens: Ah, a joke-wait how do you already have better gear than us? Humanity: F#CK AROUND AND FIND OUT ROLL FOR INITIATIVE ET! Aliens: WHAT IS BOSS MUSIC AND WHY DO I HEAR IT?!?
@@AgroSquerril to bring the words of Leonidas to the xenos "ah I think that's not possible, I think I sprained my knee as I killed all your warriors back then"
Seems to me like the lunar star docks were operating on a more advanced version of dockyard operations used by the Kaiser Shipyards of the United States during WW2
what "kind" they used an orbital strike to destroy the most populace cities, and then went to ground invasion; this suggests imperialistic tendency. Given human history, do you think any nation would willingly cede itself to be a vassal of an alien empire?
@@henrypaleveda7760 Yes. Without the shadow of a doubt. Do you have any idea how often city state/kingdoms bowed to a superior enemy to avoid taking unnecessary causualty ? That's what would happen here. Other question. Do you really think government from OTHER countries, you know, the one not getting hit, would want to fight an enemy that didn't attacked them directly ? One that could wipe out THEIR cities and THEIR population rather quickly.
@@JeRefuseDeBienPrononcerBaleine I meant with the knowledge of history and how it went for them ,do you think most countries would rather be vaslized and turned against the others under the thumb of an (genuinely) inhuman force? I also noticed that most capitulations of the kind that you talk about were because they couldn't send for help in time, evacuate, or thought that their neighbors might also surrender. With the state of communication between countries, i don't think that one would give in on account of the others barring something like spite.
@@henrypaleveda7760 You really think countries communicate that much ? Think of any global effort and how much of a pain in the ass it is to extract an empty promise that won't be followed. Here's the thing. Humanity is fractured and it's very much an "every man for itself" kind of deal only country size. If there is no extermination threat you can be sure most small or peaceful country are gonna surrender within the week.
@@JeRefuseDeBienPrononcerBaleine I figured with the paranoia, people would not trust aliens that wiped out several cities in a day to be peaceful and would rather at least feign alliance with other countries; if you look at the cooperation efforts during the second world war between allied countries, I think it is a good example of the behaviors that I was talking about as well as highlighting your points about division and indecision.
"our tech can run forever" that's nice buddy. "this gun needs to only hit you once to blow you apart. this shield lasts long enough for me to get close enough to kill you lot" who cares about later. when you need all the power you can get RIGHT HERE. RIGHT NOW!
Space is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. Which is why you need _more than 1,000 ships to patrol a galaxy with 100 to 400 _*__billion_* stars in it.
@@bogustoast22none25 Yeah, going by the millions of drones that even just a single ship used, it's safe to say that these ships are MASSIVE, maybe warhammer40k style in size, could likely deal with a whole solar system or two with just one of these ships and wipe them out of existence, with all the lunar bases on the edges, they likely have a network that's galaxy wide, so these 1k big massive ships are likely only used when a threat significant enough is present.
@@MrHuntingClaw *"Could likely deal with a star system or two with just one of these ship."* That's exactly the problem. 1,000 ships for 100,000,000,000 stars means 100 *_Million_* star systems per ship. And that's the _lower_ bracket.
@@shanerooney7288 If the far majority of those stars are calm and dealt with smaller ships for domestic use rather than intergalatic use, then you basically only have the galatic scaled ships stationed on all the edges, intervening when absolutely needed. You don't need some solar-system destroying ship stationed around every single species within a galaxy, it would likely suffice with ones used for tinier businesses.
@@MrHuntingClaw If 99.99% of the stars don't need Earth ships, that still leaves 10,000 stars per ship. I don't think you really appreciate the scale of the numbers involved here.
Funnily enough, it is theoretically possible to convert matter into anti-matter. Dumbed down to the most common understanding of the process, it literally is dump enough of the right energy into something, it'll eventually cause the matter to convert into anti-matter.
@@thomasschulz2167 FTL Lasers, Infinite energy and mass, two years to design both a lunar shipyard, six months to build. Humanity is either A. Space Wizards or B. Anime Protagonist.
@@zeehero7280 That would only bring human tech equal to or if being very generous slightly above the alien tech. Not gods that break the very laws of physics.
@@gmradio2436 the laws of physics? as if we even understand a fraction of them. Just like most good versions of FTL drive dont break the laws of physics.
While I greatly enjoy these stories, realistically, we're VERY unlikely to ever meet aliens that are even close to our technological level. Either they outpace us by millions of years or we outpace them by a similar margin and thus the outcome would be quite predictable in either case, especially since intelligent civilizations should tend to be expansive (even if the original is not, a small splinter group that is would relatively quickly outgrow the parent civilization). Basically, complex life takes a lot of time to evolve from scratch and then there's several great and small filters any upstarting civilization needs to jump through to survive, nevermind thrive on a galactic scale. Thus, we're unlikely to ever be in such a situation. Still, if by some cosmic fluke (you can never completely rule those out) we do find ourselves in such a jam, we have several advantages at our disposal, as outlined in all of these lovely and varied stories.
Technology is weird and not linear so it’s a crapshoot. Most likely you would end up with a civilization greatly more advanced in some aspects, the same in others and likely quite far behind in other areas of technology. Since a lot of knowledge in human experience has been brought about by seeming chance and directed focused effort. Every sentient organism is going to have biases it trends to when developing technology.
@@axiomshift4666 Certainly, but it's not quite a crapshoot. There are natural and hypothetical barriers that any civilization that wants to reach the Kardashev scale must overcome. My point was mostly concerned with the timespan that evolution works on. From primordial ooze to complex thinking organisms... we're probably looking at billions of years; several hundred million at the very least. The chances that there are organisms that reached sentience at roughly the same time as we did and thus had at least a few thousand years before we show up in their neck of the galactic woods by the time they can even communicate with us are vanishingly small. It could happen, but I remain skeptical about the prospect, given the numbers involved. The above radically changes as distances increase, since more volume of space = more chances for the above to actually happen, but at some point you run into the end of the observable universe and, unless we can break the speed of light (impossible under known physics, with a few theoretical workarounds that we don't have the math for yet), that's likely as far as we'll be able to go before the Big Rip catches up to us. Mind you, given the sheer amount of time and space involved, if humanity expands outside Earth, we could easily evolve to become aliens to one another eventually, but it's doubtful either one of us will see that possibility unfold... or maybe we have already and this (our universe) is simply an ancestor simulation - it would certainly explain why it's so comparatively early in the lifespan of the universe and why we're seemingly alone out here.
@@DarkVeghetta I figure that even with hundreds of millions of years aliens wouldn’t necessarily be all that much more advanced in every category Depends on more than the strict flow of time. What I think will have more of a effect than time necessarily is the traits and biases of the species at hand. Especially since the projects needed for exceedingly advanced technology seem to require massive social cohesion.
@@axiomshift4666 Relative power isn't only about scientific ability, but industrial capacity. This, as you rightly pointed out, is governed by social cohesion. I doubt a species lacking teamwork will ever progress past rudimentary scientific understanding, even if all of the constituent individuals are geniuses by our standards. Passing on knowledge and working together to get things done are likely the more important factors. That said, a very efficient hive organism like an ant colony really doesn't really need technology to out-compete pretty much everything in their area, at their scale. As such, being too good at social cohesion can be a detriment to evolving technology. There are many factors to consider, but time might be among the most important, as it governs the ability for a species to evolve the other traits necessary for true sapience and what we would recognize as civilization (which is another discussion altogether - actually recognizing something is sapient and/or has a civilization; it might not be as intuitive as most expect).
@@DarkVeghetta they would have to be fairly lucky and or well suited to not have periods of instability or stagnation that effects their advancement. There is a lot of “good enough” points of technology where to go further would be immense effort for seemingly not much gain. One of my favorite sci fi tropes was about civilizations stagnating because they had made entertainment vr and all needs were met by automated processes. Thus no more need to advance at all. This is part of why I think the species traits matters more than strict time.
The best anti projectile flack is nukes. Suddenly, your sub c super high velocity kinetic projectile, even with a plasma shield or something, hiting a ball of plasma that lingers in space after rapidly accelerating at the speed of light, at whatever speed the projectile is fighting at. You don't want to hit anything at high speedes, espceially not something allreay really really hot, and a nuclear blast is slightly plasma that turns things to plasma hot. In space, the dome will eventually kind of slow down since plamsa is like a substance, and substances typically adhear to it's own self.
This reminds me of a scenario I saw somewhere. The Borg vs. Earth. Scary, eh? Well, maybe not. Because it's a Borg fleet trying to assimilate late-era Lensverse Tellus. FTL beam weapons with the power of a star behind them...
Humans control the galaxy with one armada of 1,000 ships? That should be 1,000,000 armadas of 1,000 ships = 1 Billion ships There are 100B-400B stars in this galaxy. So 1 ship has to control at least 100 stars, minimum.
I mean antimatter cannons and singularity causing weapons should have some decent range and I’m sure not all planets are particularly worth protecting closely.
@@inso80 first create antimatter, them use nuclear fusion to turn the anti hydrogen into anti Mercury. Contain with magnetic or gravitic field opposite or around equal mass of regular mercury. On impact have mercury and anti mercury collide. Depending on quantity of mercury and anti mercury explosion may be grenade sized to planet sized.
Look, humans take their lunch breaks seriously, no one smart and not dead dares stupidly interfere with something so sacred. We’ll get around to the rest of them later.
They literally numbered in the bilions! Final wave music from the game They are Bilions (no I am not making this up) starts playing. The humanity in this story was like your typical Isekai OP protag with bunch of cheats. Absolutely bs but fun to watch heh.
I kept hearing "HFY story" as "ancient wives' story" until I finally heard it clearly, which I interpreted a scifi version of an old wives' tale. Maybe that needs to be a subgenre as well.
The biggest mistake of the aliens was assuming that taking down all the major cities would be enough. that, and assuming that one million ground troops could win a war against a planet with a population of 8 billion.
IF there are any war gamers here who like the idea of a race who took alien technology to jumpstart their own capabilities, the jackals from OPR’s Grimdark Future are pretty much it, I think.
"...these humans offer us peace with a canon pointed at our hearts" Well son, maybe you shouldn't have invaded us if you find that bothersome. Mind you, if it troubles you so much we can make you go extinct....just saying. Remember, you started this.
Trying to invade earth is like waking into a bar, seeing 120 people pointing guns at each other and yelling "alright, everyone surrender"
so.... like an block buster action movie?
@@AgroSquerril ...only for the bar occupants to point their guns at you.
@@stavinaircaeruleum2275 And all you had was a knife.
Would like it, but past 66 likes, before 69
A perfect analogy
Aliens: *wipe out entire systems for fun and profit* We come in peace
Humanity: *wages one-sided genocidal warfare in response to millions of lost lives and violent first contact* And you'll leave in pieces!
Aliens: *surprised pikachu face*
The aliens really did try and say that they came in piece when they destroyed the largest city and told us to surrender or die.
@@johnjohnjohnson7720 They will join the viltrum empire... Or die.
I love how the aliens were offered peace "with a cannon at their heart" because it's literally what they did to thousands of other civilizations
"You don't seem to like it when the spear points in the other direction doncha!"
That, in general, is the most effective way to offer peace. Neither side has any illusions.
Hello Xenos. Welcome to gunboat diplomacy. We have had several centuries of politics dedicated to it.
@@carlfranz6805 Speak soft. Big stick
To summarize most attempts to conquer humanity…
Alien civilization: Alright filthy humans it’s time for you to- *Ninety percent of the military gets vaporized in a hail of lead and fire.*
Humanity: *Just standing there smug with fifteen various degrees of weapons behind them.*
So, peace talks?
Alien civilization: P-Peace talks please.
Aliens: *enter Human space*
All factions of Humanity: YOU CAME TO THE WRONG HOUSE, FOOL!!!! OOOOOOOHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Big Smoke lives on as the Spirit of Humanity
Ratatatatata
ALL YOU HAD TO DO, WAS FOLLOW THE DAMN TRAIN CJ!!!!!!!!!!!
URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Or maybe
"You have chosen an incorrect settlement imbecile"
Human's to alien's: "It's not fun being on the receiving end is it?"
Aliens "what did we do"
Human with a probe "you know what you did"
Also Humans: "It isn't genocide if they aren't civilian casualties; you were willing to risk more than 61,000,000 soldiers and you lost them."
Aliens: You will service us!
Humans: One moment please, retrieving Geneva checklist. For the Algorithm!
@@aj_the_infamous1013 No one but humans gets to explore uranus! :D
@@MarkGast I worked on a farm. I can safely say, those aliens got serviced quite well.
"We would rather annihilate ourselves than submit to you."
At first I thought this was pretty unrealistic. Then it hit me that this was exactly what I did when playing as a nuclear-capable nation when betrayed by a much larger nuclear-capable ally in a role playing game .
Then again, that's just a game with no real consequences.
this is actually the real life doctrine for nuclear war. mutual destruction
@@stevenrodriguez763 well, that's what they're SAYING to scare the others off from doing it.
Would they actually? That's the question.
@@giarnovanzeijl399 yes since countries that include china and russia have dead man switches. its more or less an automatic choice, im almost certain the US has some sort of dead man switch too.
@@giarnovanzeijl399 we are about to find out :)
"We leveled your largest city in an attempt to offer you peace! PEACE!" Mister Alien, ya'll got a different definition of peace than we do. Let us respond in kind.
Let us show our definition of war...
You know, all these stories are beginning to convince me that an alien invasion would be good for humanity
As far as I see it if they don’t win the war quickly enough we will take anything they leave behind and reverse engineer it. And in a state where our governments actually come together , we would become monsters
@@user-mu8ok5xf8d Humans will only unite if there is a greater treat to us than ourselves. If we don't know about such treat we will continue to continue fighting against ourselves
@@user-mu8ok5xf8d If aliens were to even win said wars, who's to say that the descendants of humans wouldn't seek revenge and progress in technology behind the scenes? Going by most stories, any alien encounter would be good for humanity as long it doesn't result in extinction.
The civ's in these stories are a joke. We do not want actual aliens to do anything harmful to us. Any real movement by an Alien force at this point in our development would wipe us out completely. It would be entirely up to them whether they wanted to let us live.
Even reverse engineering would take much much longer than these stories say. It would be worse than trying to figure out an I-phone as a caveman. Our only hope is that any aliens who show up are peaceful or some sort of parody of themselves. That or they don't show up until we AT-LEAST figure out how to travel faster than light at will. Once we have a couple intergalactic spaceship equivalents we can talk about fighting aliens.
@@Merilirem Relatively to an alien race, we would be much quicker than them if they haven't had any change in their history for 400 000 years. We would likely suffer defeat at first if they don't wipe us out, we would slowly but surely start to be integrated into their society, their technology could with time and effort be retrieved and reverse engineered, sure it might take years, but it would still be feasible, reverse engineering is already taking place all over the world on smaller isolated scales, now imagine if all of humanity would focus their eyes on one single target, if even just one single individual would succeed, more would follow.
Aliens: show up with new tech.
Humans: You look like you could use some liberty and freedom.
Humans: Terra! Hell Yeah!
Or to quote the great prophet Bert Gummer: "Broke into the wrong goll-darn rec room didn't you!?!?"
lol yup
Its also a case of it doesn't matter if "You missed, with a cannon!"
@@CERBERGATERS don't forget if you want to confuse your enemy use music (red vs blue warthog song starts playing)
@@aj_the_infamous1013 Don't you mean Puma?
@@joshadams5602 What in Sam Hill is a Puma?
When the engineers went to the Moon I half expected them to turn it into a death star.
lol , given enough time i think they would
Then it wouldn't be a moon anymore! "Its not a moon"
If not the fact it plays major part in planet's biosphere, we definetly would turn it into attack moon
they didn't have gigastructural engineering installed
They just turned the lights back on hehe
Aliens: *comes to human space with intent to harm*
Humanity: *sighs and starts to play Act a fool by lil jon* Its time
"It's a lot more fun when they can't shoot back!"
"I still can't seem to hit anything..."
quite an achievement considering the usage of homing missiles.
I didn't play too much Stelaris yet, but the closest aproximation of this would be that the empire forcibly spawned Khan at crisis level 10 in their own backyard no less, while also accidently uplifting humanity.
Sounds more like an awakened empire visiting earth and getting their asses kicked and tech stolen. and then the humans became the new crisis.
@@zeehero7280 When crisis visits tall empire with strong enouth fleets to resist, while it has full stock of alloys
>:D
@@Crazylom Always nice when your future vassals visit you to submit.
Aliens: Join our empire or *die!*
Humans: … how many times do we need to teach you this lesson old man!?
Siblings may fight each other, but the moment, a bully comes on a sibling, the siblings stand together. Familia.
I like the way he said "thay offered us peace with a canon pointed at our hearts" implying they don't have heads
Implying they have hearts in their heads.
@@Merilirem hmmm smart
if they did have heads they would have brains and give up much earlier.
This story reminded me of Christopher Titus’ “Fifth Annual End Of The World tour” when he talks about giving the Middle East a television subscription to explain why they shouldn’t piss the USA off or they’ll see what gets built next.
“Don’t mess with the Nation that needs medication.”
"The middle east" not any specific countries of course because why would an American ever want to know exactly who they're fighting, nope because one foreign brown person is quite like another right? Of you knew the name of the individual countries you were bombing you might start to see their citizens as human and we can't have that, your leaders need you frothing at the mouth to kill whoever they point fingers at next or their corporate lobbyists bottom line might take a hit.
@@seekingabsolution1907 you seem to be taking a RUclips comment meant to be a joking reference FAR too seriously
@@seekingabsolution1907 And that's how war was declared on Israel! Wait..
This is what we build and blow up when we’re having fun. Imagine what we build and blow up when we’re pissed.
Feel like someone narrating his loosing at an rts game
Sounds like a skill issue
lmao, they really thought humanity would just sit around and wait for two years???
Gotta have sexy time before going to war.
We need to have hormone release first.
Alright bot of you, why have sexy time when you can build weapon of mass destruction at a speed even the most advanced alien couldn't even dream of?
In fairness, they could have studied some stoners by mistake while here...
@@basrengangetch.2042 Wait... That's not sexy time? I have got to get out more...
Aliens didn't do their research. So, they found out.
yup
Or as the more accurate term was: "Fuck around and find out."
@@Worn_Guide I prefer “ play stupid games, get stupid prizes”
We are human. We offer you mercy, but not forgiveness.
I'm just going to say that humans taking over an entire galaxy is not surprising as it is implied that the aliens already had full control of multiple galaxy's
Aliens: BLOW UP A CITY AS FIRST CONTACT PROTOCOL
Humans: Vaporize 27 out of 300 alien armadas (you know, exclusively 100% valid military targets)
Aliens:"ThAt'S gEnOcIdE!"
Lol old human proverb.
"Offer one hand. Arm the other."
That's so damn cool
Don’t upset the monkeys, they bite!!!
that they do
Earth, _mostly_ harmless.
@@shanerooney7288
From every other story that describes earth, no.
It's not mostly harmless.
@@phasepanther4423
You not a fan of the classics?
@@shanerooney7288
I tend to prefer the deathworld descriptive tag that some stories place on earth.
That to prevent panic, other governments limit any information about the human homeworld.
The last thing they would need is to know that the friendly little human in the room next to theirs is nearly impossible to kill and is from a species capable of great feats even in the face of death.
I've seen some freaky stuff since I started watching these stories, but this has got to be the first one where humanity is so absolutely, ruthlessly overpowered that it's somewhere between laughable and WTF?!!!
It's not unrealistic though, humans tend to go overboard in every aspect. Why have a car that just is enough for the things you use it if you can also get one that's twice as strong? Why only make weapons that will work if you can make them long range hole punchers with enough force to level a building? Why only eat stuff that is enough to survive if you can have a feast? And to be fair, we humans are quite good at reverse engineering stuff :D
The one word to describe humans: MORE
The human ingenuity is great.
What fair's fair, it's not the humans falt they're better at the armed diplomacy game
I mean it's not like we have been doing that sorta thing for our entire history, practice makes perfect right?
-humans- Europeans*
@@honkeykong4049 none Europeans have had a fair bit of experience too
Is anyone really surprised
No
Only because they ended up getting that many engineers that quickly.”
apart from the foolish zenos, no
@@crayonchomper1180 *filthy xenos*
The Empire clearly was.
Alien invade:
Human, start winning
Aliens:No this isn't how the game is suppose to be play
Watch this with the Red Alert 3 theme in the background its an experience like no other
I was thinking Hell March myself.
@@robertschumacher2707 that is another good option
Now to figure out which hell March. I'd personally nominate hell March 1.
>.>; Gamestonks?
@@tanknerd7193 pop
Just remember that the tsar Bomba was the biggest bomb we have ever *detonated*. The Poseidons' wrath torpedoes that the Russians have supposedly have an explosive yield of 200mt.
I'm sorry, we have WHAT?
Also, Tsar bomb actually was around 1.4 times weaker than it was INTENDED.
The one in charge for bomb test and it's cores desided in last moment, that it would be boom to big to handle for Earth, and desided to unload one core off.
It would be ~90Mtons, if not precaution.
@@Crazylom also 50megatons nuke is about the same yield as 1kg of antimatter would get you.
@@zeehero7280 Haven't played with that yet. But had some fun with pasto and antipasto...
I hope they don't use them. I'd hate to have to restart civilization again.
They didn't study hard enough, and when they started pushing the humans started giving them practical lessons.
Aliens: *Vaporizes our largest city*. "As you can see we are very powerful, so just bow down and we can start renovating the place."
Humanity: Oh no, that's not how this works.
Aliens: Wait what
Humanity: See, you just started a fight with us.
Aliens: no, we...we cowed you...so you'd surrender.
Humanity: Oh, you sweet summer child. No, you attacked us, and we're still alive. *So now we're your problem until one of us quits breathing.*
Aliens: Ah, a joke-wait how do you already have better gear than us?
Humanity: F#CK AROUND AND FIND OUT ROLL FOR INITIATIVE ET!
Aliens: WHAT IS BOSS MUSIC AND WHY DO I HEAR IT?!?
Aliens: bend your knee or be destroyed
Humans: no you
i don't understand , maybe you should demonstrate
@@AgroSquerril to bring the words of Leonidas to the xenos "ah I think that's not possible, I think I sprained my knee as I killed all your warriors back then"
@@wolfoffenris9951 love that line
For the Squirrel, for the algorithm, For the EMPEROR!
For the algorithm for Argo for the empire
Seems to me like the lunar star docks were operating on a more advanced version of dockyard operations used by the Kaiser Shipyards of the United States during WW2
And The Emperor of Man launched the Great Crusade...
The Emperor protects, Xenos fear, and Khorne laughs.
Considering the kind of aliens in the story, pretty sure a good chunk of Earth would have capitulated.
what "kind" they used an orbital strike to destroy the most populace cities, and then went to ground invasion; this suggests imperialistic tendency. Given human history, do you think any nation would willingly cede itself to be a vassal of an alien empire?
@@henrypaleveda7760 Yes. Without the shadow of a doubt. Do you have any idea how often city state/kingdoms bowed to a superior enemy to avoid taking unnecessary causualty ? That's what would happen here.
Other question. Do you really think government from OTHER countries, you know, the one not getting hit, would want to fight an enemy that didn't attacked them directly ? One that could wipe out THEIR cities and THEIR population rather quickly.
@@JeRefuseDeBienPrononcerBaleine I meant with the knowledge of history and how it went for them ,do you think most countries would rather be vaslized and turned against the others under the thumb of an (genuinely) inhuman force? I also noticed that most capitulations of the kind that you talk about were because they couldn't send for help in time, evacuate, or thought that their neighbors might also surrender. With the state of communication between countries, i don't think that one would give in on account of the others barring something like spite.
@@henrypaleveda7760 You really think countries communicate that much ? Think of any global effort and how much of a pain in the ass it is to extract an empty promise that won't be followed.
Here's the thing. Humanity is fractured and it's very much an "every man for itself" kind of deal only country size. If there is no extermination threat you can be sure most small or peaceful country are gonna surrender within the week.
@@JeRefuseDeBienPrononcerBaleine I figured with the paranoia, people would not trust aliens that wiped out several cities in a day to be peaceful and would rather at least feign alliance with other countries; if you look at the cooperation efforts during the second world war between allied countries, I think it is a good example of the behaviors that I was talking about as well as highlighting your points about division and indecision.
"our tech can run forever" that's nice buddy.
"this gun needs to only hit you once to blow you apart. this shield lasts long enough for me to get close enough to kill you lot"
who cares about later. when you need all the power you can get RIGHT HERE. RIGHT NOW!
When you get set into a routine... that is when Murphy's Law comes a callin!
thats a daily thing
Never anger and threaten a human not to mention more than one.
If we ever did actualy find an advanced alien race that is superior to us, that would be the catalyst to unite humanity.
probably
Like, only complete dumbass would be picky about anything when you can stomp alien roaches with buddies together
that was silly of them, should have started with the orbital bombardments.
handing out free tech vis combat losses is plain silly
Yeah, ask Joe.
Space is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is.
Which is why you need _more than 1,000 ships to patrol a galaxy with 100 to 400 _*__billion_* stars in it.
Yeah but the again, those 1,000 are the only threat to anything.
@@bogustoast22none25 Yeah, going by the millions of drones that even just a single ship used, it's safe to say that these ships are MASSIVE, maybe warhammer40k style in size, could likely deal with a whole solar system or two with just one of these ships and wipe them out of existence, with all the lunar bases on the edges, they likely have a network that's galaxy wide, so these 1k big massive ships are likely only used when a threat significant enough is present.
@@MrHuntingClaw
*"Could likely deal with a star system or two with just one of these ship."*
That's exactly the problem.
1,000 ships for 100,000,000,000 stars means 100 *_Million_* star systems per ship. And that's the _lower_ bracket.
@@shanerooney7288 If the far majority of those stars are calm and dealt with smaller ships for domestic use rather than intergalatic use, then you basically only have the galatic scaled ships stationed on all the edges, intervening when absolutely needed. You don't need some solar-system destroying ship stationed around every single species within a galaxy, it would likely suffice with ones used for tinier businesses.
@@MrHuntingClaw
If 99.99% of the stars don't need Earth ships, that still leaves 10,000 stars per ship.
I don't think you really appreciate the scale of the numbers involved here.
I was onboard until the anti matter cannons. That is when it turned into space magic for me.
Funnily enough, it is theoretically possible to convert matter into anti-matter. Dumbed down to the most common understanding of the process, it literally is dump enough of the right energy into something, it'll eventually cause the matter to convert into anti-matter.
@@thomasschulz2167 FTL Lasers, Infinite energy and mass, two years to design both a lunar shipyard, six months to build. Humanity is either A. Space Wizards or B. Anime Protagonist.
@@gmradio2436 stole alien tech, it's possible, depending how advanced that tech is. starts with handheld weapons, then ship wreckage.
@@zeehero7280 That would only bring human tech equal to or if being very generous slightly above the alien tech. Not gods that break the very laws of physics.
@@gmradio2436 the laws of physics? as if we even understand a fraction of them. Just like most good versions of FTL drive dont break the laws of physics.
Liked the video before it even premiered
Same!
:)
City: *gets blown up*
Humanity: YEET!
Thanks!
Thank you for the dono , not sure why RUclips didn't notify me about this one, youtube being youtube I suppose.
While I greatly enjoy these stories, realistically, we're VERY unlikely to ever meet aliens that are even close to our technological level. Either they outpace us by millions of years or we outpace them by a similar margin and thus the outcome would be quite predictable in either case, especially since intelligent civilizations should tend to be expansive (even if the original is not, a small splinter group that is would relatively quickly outgrow the parent civilization).
Basically, complex life takes a lot of time to evolve from scratch and then there's several great and small filters any upstarting civilization needs to jump through to survive, nevermind thrive on a galactic scale. Thus, we're unlikely to ever be in such a situation.
Still, if by some cosmic fluke (you can never completely rule those out) we do find ourselves in such a jam, we have several advantages at our disposal, as outlined in all of these lovely and varied stories.
Technology is weird and not linear so it’s a crapshoot. Most likely you would end up with a civilization greatly more advanced in some aspects, the same in others and likely quite far behind in other areas of technology. Since a lot of knowledge in human experience has been brought about by seeming chance and directed focused effort. Every sentient organism is going to have biases it trends to when developing technology.
@@axiomshift4666 Certainly, but it's not quite a crapshoot. There are natural and hypothetical barriers that any civilization that wants to reach the Kardashev scale must overcome.
My point was mostly concerned with the timespan that evolution works on. From primordial ooze to complex thinking organisms... we're probably looking at billions of years; several hundred million at the very least.
The chances that there are organisms that reached sentience at roughly the same time as we did and thus had at least a few thousand years before we show up in their neck of the galactic woods by the time they can even communicate with us are vanishingly small. It could happen, but I remain skeptical about the prospect, given the numbers involved.
The above radically changes as distances increase, since more volume of space = more chances for the above to actually happen, but at some point you run into the end of the observable universe and, unless we can break the speed of light (impossible under known physics, with a few theoretical workarounds that we don't have the math for yet), that's likely as far as we'll be able to go before the Big Rip catches up to us.
Mind you, given the sheer amount of time and space involved, if humanity expands outside Earth, we could easily evolve to become aliens to one another eventually, but it's doubtful either one of us will see that possibility unfold... or maybe we have already and this (our universe) is simply an ancestor simulation - it would certainly explain why it's so comparatively early in the lifespan of the universe and why we're seemingly alone out here.
@@DarkVeghetta I figure that even with hundreds of millions of years aliens wouldn’t necessarily be all that much more advanced in every category Depends on more than the strict flow of time.
What I think will have more of a effect than time necessarily is the traits and biases of the species at hand. Especially since the projects needed for exceedingly advanced technology seem to require massive social cohesion.
@@axiomshift4666 Relative power isn't only about scientific ability, but industrial capacity. This, as you rightly pointed out, is governed by social cohesion.
I doubt a species lacking teamwork will ever progress past rudimentary scientific understanding, even if all of the constituent individuals are geniuses by our standards. Passing on knowledge and working together to get things done are likely the more important factors.
That said, a very efficient hive organism like an ant colony really doesn't really need technology to out-compete pretty much everything in their area, at their scale. As such, being too good at social cohesion can be a detriment to evolving technology.
There are many factors to consider, but time might be among the most important, as it governs the ability for a species to evolve the other traits necessary for true sapience and what we would recognize as civilization (which is another discussion altogether - actually recognizing something is sapient and/or has a civilization; it might not be as intuitive as most expect).
@@DarkVeghetta they would have to be fairly lucky and or well suited to not have periods of instability or stagnation that effects their advancement. There is a lot of “good enough” points of technology where to go further would be immense effort for seemingly not much gain.
One of my favorite sci fi tropes was about civilizations stagnating because they had made entertainment vr and all needs were met by automated processes. Thus no more need to advance at all. This is part of why I think the species traits matters more than strict time.
Aaahhh, yes. The classic "Feck around and find out" gambit. One of my personal favorites. 😜
Thanks for the video.
This story is the most closest to a "No, you! moment ever 🤣
Humanity Unites under one Banner when faced with a common enemy.
9:47 Dayuum, Earth bout to become a star killer base 😂👌
If you have a focused beam of energy or vertual particle, you can make more, or make them real. I kind of forget the exact details.
Awww yeah made it to the premier
For the algorithm
For the algorithm
FOR THE ALGORITHIM AAHHH!
For the algorithm
keeper going
kept going
"Back to you my friends."
Greetings Mentlegent!
For the rhythm that is algo
They poked the bear, and it roared. Then it ate them.
sounds about right
The aliens know they are doomed when the Russians start chanting 'Merica...Merica...Merica...'
"We don't negotiate with terrorists."
The best anti projectile flack is nukes.
Suddenly, your sub c super high velocity kinetic projectile, even with a plasma shield or something, hiting a ball of plasma that lingers in space after rapidly accelerating at the speed of light, at whatever speed the projectile is fighting at.
You don't want to hit anything at high speedes, espceially not something allreay really really hot, and a nuclear blast is slightly plasma that turns things to plasma hot.
In space, the dome will eventually kind of slow down since plamsa is like a substance, and substances typically adhear to it's own self.
hoisted on their on petards
enjoyed the story and narration
This reminds me of a scenario I saw somewhere. The Borg vs. Earth. Scary, eh? Well, maybe not. Because it's a Borg fleet trying to assimilate late-era Lensverse Tellus. FTL beam weapons with the power of a star behind them...
Humans control the galaxy with one armada of 1,000 ships?
That should be 1,000,000 armadas of 1,000 ships = 1 Billion ships
There are 100B-400B stars in this galaxy. So 1 ship has to control at least 100 stars, minimum.
I mean antimatter cannons and singularity causing weapons should have some decent range and I’m sure not all planets are particularly worth protecting closely.
They said something like a hundred lightyear range on some weapon or other...
Should they? Tell me vow that antimercury stuff is supposed to work and ill tell you why these concepts are retarded.
@@carlfranz6805 They have cannons on lunar bases with 1000 LY range that causes short-lived singularties.
@@inso80 first create antimatter, them use nuclear fusion to turn the anti hydrogen into anti Mercury. Contain with magnetic or gravitic field opposite or around equal mass of regular mercury. On impact have mercury and anti mercury collide. Depending on quantity of mercury and anti mercury explosion may be grenade sized to planet sized.
Earth: Ain't no one gonna kill my babies but me and themselves!
For the Squerril
For Argo
Humans just did a, "You don't seem to understand, Earth is not yours to conquer."
yarp
*INDEPENDENCE DAY INTENSIFIED*
As Sargent Johnson would of said "dont fuck with humanity" lol
humanity: "dont try to conquer us"
Stellaris one planet only challenge
Except it's Birch world in terms of OP
i just missread this as:
the endless MERCANTILE hordes
Alien: OK we just blew up one of their big cities. Wait, why do I hear the Doom music?
Peace through superior firepower.
The lesson here? Don’t Fuck with Earth!
i believe that is called .... big stick diplomacy
In our own reality... As soon as anyone on Earth had some of the alien weapons, they would turn them on their Earthly enemies.
And they call this human. John Wick
To please the algorithm is all
Human Improvement: More Power oh oh oh
They gave humans something to hate more than each other....
Look, humans take their lunch breaks seriously, no one smart and not dead dares stupidly interfere with something so sacred. We’ll get around to the rest of them later.
Aww well ,you fuck with bull,you get the horn !!!
They literally numbered in the bilions!
Final wave music from the game They are Bilions (no I am not making this up) starts playing.
The humanity in this story was like your typical Isekai OP protag with bunch of cheats. Absolutely bs but fun to watch heh.
They picked a fight and we ended it.
I kept hearing "HFY story" as "ancient wives' story" until I finally heard it clearly, which I interpreted a scifi version of an old wives' tale. Maybe that needs to be a subgenre as well.
This is why you don't annoy humans.
I somehow think of Will Smith's line from Independence Day
Agro Squerril and Net Narrator should collab/ do a crossover. that way they don't double up
See the problem is Aliens never establish a safe word...
How'd you like THEM apples?
The biggest mistake of the aliens was assuming that taking down all the major cities would be enough.
that, and assuming that one million ground troops could win a war against a planet with a population of 8 billion.
Good old shotgun diplomacy
To quote dbz abridged, "what are we gonna do we can't beat em, and I swear to God kakarot if you say hit them really hard I will end you."
If you want peace, you dont glass a city just to get everyone's attention
Peace and life, or peace of the grave. Take your pick, we are good either way.
For the algorithm!
For the algorithm
Well, there sollar sheild idea.
IF there are any war gamers here who like the idea of a race who took alien technology to jumpstart their own capabilities, the jackals from OPR’s Grimdark Future are pretty much it, I think.
"...these humans offer us peace with a canon pointed at our hearts" Well son, maybe you shouldn't have invaded us if you find that bothersome. Mind you, if it troubles you so much we can make you go extinct....just saying. Remember, you started this.