The Self-Improvement Trap (and how to avoid it)

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  • Опубликовано: 8 янв 2025

Комментарии • 797

  • @JoeDelaneyy
    @JoeDelaneyy  11 месяцев назад +1137

    Yo fellas/girls, sorry about the hiatus. This video is a little different to the usual, but I'm going to exercise my freedom a little this year and have more fun doing stuff I find interesting. Hope you will come along for the ride. x

    • @scorpionvibe4842
      @scorpionvibe4842 11 месяцев назад +19

      Yo, i actually prefer this kind of videos, its these that got me to know You and not the fitness stuff (although i enjoy it aswell). Cheers

    • @bobhouse9331
      @bobhouse9331 11 месяцев назад +8

      Looking forward to part two of this vid. Your authenticity is infectious.

    • @poetarchives
      @poetarchives 11 месяцев назад +2

      I ordered and read picture of Dorian gray because of one of your videos like this. Please more !

    • @michaellederstatter9610
      @michaellederstatter9610 11 месяцев назад

      Love it. Stay authentic. Speak your truth.

    • @Frank-yy6ut
      @Frank-yy6ut 11 месяцев назад +2

      Some of your non-fitness content really hits the mark. Straight talking and thought provoking. Thanks Joe!

  • @therapywithsenny1449
    @therapywithsenny1449 11 месяцев назад +1075

    This is gold Joe and we absolutely need part 2

  • @aMuffingaming
    @aMuffingaming 11 месяцев назад +633

    Joe is literally the only fitness influencer I have ever resonated with and I think it’s because he doesn’t want me to

    • @MrFredstt
      @MrFredstt 11 месяцев назад +23

      Yeah. He's just a dude in front of a camera. No act or anything. Notice he doesn't even censor his videos like most influencers do to maximize profits and monetization. Joe seems to do this bc he genuinely likes doing it first and foremost

    • @agonsfitness7308
      @agonsfitness7308 11 месяцев назад +5

      Why did I read this comment in Joe's deadpan voice?

    • @vasilisblazos8994
      @vasilisblazos8994 11 месяцев назад +6

      I met Joe briefly once at the mall and he seemed so down to Earth. That's why Joey D is my hero.

    • @JoeBeats8781
      @JoeBeats8781 11 месяцев назад +1

      @@vasilisblazos8994if u aren’t kidding then you must be the luckiest person on Earth

    • @vasilisblazos8994
      @vasilisblazos8994 11 месяцев назад +3

      @@JoeBeats8781 nah fr, I met him and his wife and took a pic haha. He lives in the same city as me so just chance really.

  • @35PHaaton
    @35PHaaton 11 месяцев назад +321

    My self improvement tip for anyone out there: Have good friends and family members around you, let people into your life, don't take life so seriously, stay healthy and eat right, go find love, enjoy the boring moments in life, and lastly keep everything simple and in moderation. Goodluck to you and I wish you the best.

    • @RelaxAndSmokeMeth
      @RelaxAndSmokeMeth 11 месяцев назад +2

      will love just find you?

    • @TheGreektrojan
      @TheGreektrojan 11 месяцев назад +16

      @@RelaxAndSmokeMeth Nah, you got to invite it in but it'll happen if you cast a wide net and stay open. Trying to min/max relationships and love is how you fall down the blackpill incel rabbit hole of bitterness. Like Joe said, people dance around the akwardness of building relationships and the pain of rejection but its not that bad and you'd be surprised how much actually doing the things pays off. I am a true top 1% introvert but Joe is correct that the glorification of solitude is mostly a trap to convince lonely people that not trying/waiting is the noble thing, not a justification of their fears.

    • @JulianJamesProd.
      @JulianJamesProd. 11 месяцев назад +3

      Ur a wise man, it sounds simple yet very few people understand this is the recipe for a happy life

    • @JulianJamesProd.
      @JulianJamesProd. 11 месяцев назад

      @@DA-og5pj Thats where you are wrong though. I hope you can think critically. Your mindset will ONLY make you want more and more, you'll never be satisfied. I never said i want to be average because the average person is very unhealthy with poor relationships. I want succes, for me that is not the equivalent of status and LOTs of money. Succes is being very good and disciplined at what i love doing and being fit with good people around me. Your definition of a "great man" is childish and that's fine. Not everyone can look past fame and money

    • @theparkworkoutguy
      @theparkworkoutguy 11 месяцев назад +4

      I like your point about moderation. Self-improvement RUclipsrs like Hamza constantly preach about working all day, which isn't always healthy

  • @helpfulcommenter
    @helpfulcommenter 11 месяцев назад +245

    Becoming a father is a significant shift from "What I can I get from it" to "What can I give" and without ever mentioning being a dad, you nailed it.

    • @MrFredstt
      @MrFredstt 11 месяцев назад +5

      I myself have no children but I'm assuming this is something that's almost impossible to truly understand until you're a parent yourself

    • @ph318
      @ph318 11 месяцев назад +3

      You should enter all relationships with the mindset of giving.

  • @matthewlee9652
    @matthewlee9652 11 месяцев назад +52

    The part about self-improvement being a form a procrastination from the thing that actually needs done is absolutely spot on. I used to be stuck in a trap of trying to optimise every little detail to the point where it took so long to actually start doing the important task at hand. This is the kind of video that many people need

  • @brewersloss
    @brewersloss 11 месяцев назад +64

    “Most people know what they need to do to improve themselves or their lives. Self improvement is just a dance they do, while they’re psyching themselves up to do it”
    This hit me hard.
    I’ve actually pretty much mastered all the routines, hacks, disciplines, lists and lifestyles. All without really tackling a couple of really big issues I should’ve addressed years ago.
    Indulge in self improvement by all means. Just don’t let it become another form of procrastination.

    • @jamescoleman4319
      @jamescoleman4319 11 месяцев назад +3

      Yeah this resonated with me a lot too 💪🏼 I’m guilty of this.

    • @blackbriarmead1966
      @blackbriarmead1966 11 месяцев назад +2

      For me It’s helped me realize what exactly the problems are. It’s a form a soul searching, but I prefer people like dr k. Maybe that’s not self help. But it helped me realize I shouldn’t drink so much, and maybe I should stop using weed at 21. And I’ve done those things. Now I’m trying to figure out how to make my job easier by figuring out how to sustainably keep myself healthy and mentally sharp. I’m hoping that within a year I’ll have figured that stuff out. But I’m afraid I’ll get stuck in a cycle of being placed under lots of stress and losing whatever progress I made. So I have a certain determination to actually change, but who tf knows how I will feel after being stressed for a long time

  • @charlesjohnson8106
    @charlesjohnson8106 11 месяцев назад +36

    "that doesn't make you a discipline ninja, just an adult" -- beautiful.

    • @edge3220
      @edge3220 11 месяцев назад

      Huge lack of that these days.

  • @BrandonTalksFitness
    @BrandonTalksFitness 11 месяцев назад +166

    I’m so happy you made this video. We’ve lost the art of simply living and enjoying life.

    • @markhill8150
      @markhill8150 11 месяцев назад +4

      Bang on.

    • @CPSFC
      @CPSFC 11 месяцев назад +18

      This x1000. Probs explains why a lot of self improvement guys / girls never truly look happy. Cos they've replaced joy with 'whats optimal'

    • @BrandonTalksFitness
      @BrandonTalksFitness 11 месяцев назад +13

      @@CPSFC yep. I think most of us go through that phase when we’re young and feel lost/confused. But over time you realize that doing things you genuinely enjoy is the best way forward

    • @MrFredstt
      @MrFredstt 11 месяцев назад +9

      @@BrandonTalksFitness Yep. Some people are too focused on what's the most productive, beneficial, or optimal thing when sometimes you should just chill out and do whatever you wanna do simply bc it's enjoyable

    • @CPSFC
      @CPSFC 11 месяцев назад +4

      @@BrandonTalksFitness 100% Its like they need a positive reason to do anything.
      Enjoy a movie with your wife / girlfriend?
      nah, only if its a masculinity movie that moves me forward
      I think once you start learning from the 'happiest' people it helps a lot!

  • @SummerLangereis
    @SummerLangereis 11 месяцев назад +59

    Spot on Joe. I used to do some of the popular self improved things. “Doing nothing” was not worth my time. Every walk had to be atleast x steps long, I had to listen to educational podcast, I had to write down my goals, what I was grateful for, thing I did well and things I could improve on. I couldn’t just watch a movie or show for fun. Fun wasn’t useful. I had to learn, I had to grow. It burned me out. What I did instead: some therapy to help me deal with trauma I was not addressing by distracting myself with fluff, learning that ‘doing’ nothing is very useful (fun movies are fun), being alone with my own thoughts instead of dimming them with another 2 hour podcast I can’t even recall now, enjoying a walk for what it is, not using it at a vessel for useful stuff, switching to firm where unpaid extra hours aren’t glorified, spending more time with friends an family instead of being alone reaching my “goals”.

    • @systemizesuccess
      @systemizesuccess 11 месяцев назад

      ☝️This 👍

    • @Stracciulein
      @Stracciulein 11 месяцев назад +1

      "Fun wasn’t useful. I had to learn, I had to grow. It burned me out" man I swear I was in the same exact boat. For the longest time I thought that was the right path to follow, but then I realized that I wasn't going anywhere because there isn't really and end to that path. It's infinite. So the hard part was trying to realize that I have already everything that I needed, the "constantly searching" thing was really not necessary for my own self, or maybe it was some kind of coping mechanism. The trick is to have the courage to let everything go.

  • @kamilrosinski2042
    @kamilrosinski2042 11 месяцев назад +48

    Self improvement is just dancing around the thing you know you need to do. I loved that, it’s so true in most cases. Part 2 pls.

  • @Joseph-im8be
    @Joseph-im8be 11 месяцев назад +55

    Phenomenal post mate! People are starting to realise this. I’m a self improvement junkie as much as the next person, trying to optimise my life where I can. But I think much of it is a trap, the more self improvement you do, the more deficient you think you are. There’s always something missing. I heard an idea recently which is ‘self unfoldment’. It might sounds like another buzzword, but the idea is that you already have all the potential in the world, you’re just in the process of letting more of it out. Less forcing cookie cutter habit building, more following what you actually find fun, invigorating, enjoyable etc.

    • @nicolasguillenc
      @nicolasguillenc 11 месяцев назад +5

      “The more self improvement you do, the more deficient you think you are” thanks for sharing that man. I think that’s how I’m feeling, having that thought for a long period of time can really make you see yourself like a looser and then act as a looser. I’m trying to get out of it.

  • @ihateweetabix8829
    @ihateweetabix8829 11 месяцев назад +250

    Most of my “self improvement” has come from literally just living life. It gets confusing when you make self improvement your personality

    • @readsomebooks4506
      @readsomebooks4506 11 месяцев назад +4

      Just say you're soft

    • @ihateweetabix8829
      @ihateweetabix8829 11 месяцев назад

      @@readsomebooks4506 Hope i didn't hit a nerve readsomebooks 😆

    • @Invictus4318
      @Invictus4318 11 месяцев назад

      @@readsomebooks4506Soz ‘ard Goggins

    • @marvin2678
      @marvin2678 11 месяцев назад

      why does it get confusing ?

    • @JoeBeats8781
      @JoeBeats8781 11 месяцев назад +10

      @@readsomebooks4506dude this guy is spitting facts he’s learning from his mistakes in life I think that makes him mature and smart not soft

  • @ColossalKiwi
    @ColossalKiwi 10 месяцев назад +2

    What a breath of fresh air. A part 2 would be more than welcome, in your own time.

  • @yittheyak8402
    @yittheyak8402 11 месяцев назад +24

    Make a part 2 Joe. And more videos like this. You’re clearly an intelligent guy and especially linguistically talented. You have the thoughts we all have but illustrate them in a way most of us cannot. Best of luck with fatherhood and the rest of your life in general. You make a great dad

    • @blablabik1
      @blablabik1 10 месяцев назад

      i cant just like this comment, i have to say its great freaking comment

  • @MartinoNotts
    @MartinoNotts 10 месяцев назад +1

    8:00 - 'it's all just a dance around psyching ourselves up for doing the thing...' - Right on. Do the thing. Or don't.

  • @him050
    @him050 11 месяцев назад +7

    It’s like people who constantly read books about organising their lives, instead of actually organising their lives.

  • @drrukhtaz7969
    @drrukhtaz7969 5 месяцев назад +1

    Most straight forward and on point content

  • @M_is_lost
    @M_is_lost 10 месяцев назад +2

    Awesome video Joe!
    I was down the rabbit hole of (self)hatred for a long time, distrusting everything and everyone. Seemingly the only thing that got me out of it were the people who told me to be myself and do what matters to me.
    Learn to think for yourself and be sceptical about what you hear from others, but don't be cynical.
    I love your work, it's amazing.

  • @nelsonhoffman5922
    @nelsonhoffman5922 11 месяцев назад +17

    0:56 Couldn't agree more, mate. Every bit of this video resonated with me . SO glad you finally said what I think so many of us are actually thinking. Part 2 Please. This is peak JoeyD

  • @simontaylor2525
    @simontaylor2525 11 месяцев назад +21

    I had a feeling that we had reached peak bullshit, and usually if you're feeling something everyone else is too. Concisely and eloquently expressed by this chap, top lad.

  • @mikefarah8162
    @mikefarah8162 11 месяцев назад +23

    You can tell he really spends time in meditation. What he's speaking about is self-awareness and being present, not fixating on the future or losing yourself to what other people think. But seeing your stream of consciousness for what it is. An illusion. And being liberated by living in the now. Not in the tomorrow or yesterday. LOVE THIS CONTENT JOE!!

  • @DC-no3vi
    @DC-no3vi 11 месяцев назад +20

    One of the best videos I watched in a while. I hate how this self improvement bs is forced down everyones throats nowdays, convincing you that your life is shit when it's actually quite normal and good and trying to make you feel like you're not enough. Selling you silly routines and habbits thats ultimately just distract you from your actual goals. I'm hoping for pt.2 and honestly more videos like this. You can only make so many fitness videos but you definitely have more wisdom to share in other areas of life.

  • @eny661
    @eny661 11 месяцев назад +5

    My god, dude, you put it into words. Thank you for sharing all this with us.
    A line of thought: Self Improvement can not only be a dance but a distraction and an escape from a life or a reality that feels lacking in some way. I think people tend to turn to this extremely rigid form of self - Improvement because of an underlying anxiety of them or their lives never feeling good enough and are then sold a performative and often empty version of self improvement that promises the relief of these anxieties through reaching a state of perfection and productivity in everything they do, be it oh so small as making your bed in the morning. It‘s the idea of total control over who you are and who you become. At the same time, it puts a constant focus on everything that you‘re not already, that you‘re still lacking. This further fuels your anxieties, ultimately trapping you in an endless cycle of „there’s something wrong with me“ and „let me fix it“. And the moral high ground of improving yourself easily blinds you to the reality that a, that’s hardly what you’re actually doing, and b, you might actually be pretty okay the way you are.

  • @P3ND3M
    @P3ND3M 11 месяцев назад +13

    I don’t think this could have been articulated any better.
    Please do a part 2, I simply love your thought processes and the way you dissect these types of subjects, which quite frankly I have never even thought of or cared about, but you have a way of bringing interest to it in a way I can’t explain.
    And this is why, Joe Delaney, you are OUR hero

  • @projectstoicism
    @projectstoicism 11 месяцев назад +3

    One of the quotes in Stoicism from Seneca about friends that I like: “If you are looking on anyone as a friend when you do not trust him as you trust yourself, you are making a grave mistake, and have failed to grasp sufficiently the full force of true friendship.”
    This is why I like Stoicism so much, as it focuses on human interaction and that friendship is something beautiful and imperative in our lives. If we have a friend, we should "speak as unreservedly with him as we do with ourselves"

  • @1783W
    @1783W 11 месяцев назад +1

    I am glad that Joe values informing people more than being clickbaity and chasing content trends. It's so easy to get caught up in numbers but Joe's channel stays refreshing and genuine.

  • @Sevacia
    @Sevacia 11 месяцев назад +1

    i’m so grateful for this vid cuz it’s so real. i remember being depressed and low self esteem and just watching tons of self improvement videos without ever thinking about my problems with my own perspective. it feels very unnatural to live this way and you’re never really present in the moment when you fall into this trap and make what these self improvement gurus tell you such a big part of your life.
    life as a kid is so great when you’re just living and enjoying life for what it is rather than living life based on someone else’s terms doing stressing over trying to grow all the time. stop getting wrapped up in improving and enjoy life

  • @BigLu4
    @BigLu4 11 месяцев назад +5

    03:28 describes perfectly how I feel about the internet and the type of people it is creating. We're all being taught to "think like the rich" and as far as I'm concerned the more we do that the more self absorbed we become and the more we move away from society. We're raising a generation of narcissists who view relationships as transactional.
    I've seen multiple Instagram posts complaining about the standard of living in the west at the moment and all the comments are 20-30 year old men saying stuff like "It's not my fault you don't have a side hustle", "work harder", "socialism bad". It's absolutely cringe. People are drinking the Andrew Tate cool aid (which in itself is not all bad) but the ego's these people develop and the me vs the world mentality they adopt is cringe.
    You can want and achieve better for yourself whilst advocating for people less fortunate than yourself, the two are not mutually exclusive. The change we want to see in the world comes from our behavior, if everyone behaves like a selfish c**t then we'll create a society of selfish c**ts. So, go and get better for yourself but keep in mind that we live in a society and the world does not revolve around your wants and needs.

    • @CurtisArden-l7h
      @CurtisArden-l7h 11 месяцев назад +1

      Spot on.
      The best solution? While in a sane state of mind, leave these platforms which feeds this self-absorption.

  • @tombraselton2671
    @tombraselton2671 6 месяцев назад +2

    Hey again, Joe. I’ve known about you for some time but just now started watching some of your videos. I really like your views on things as they match mine very closely. For example, the doing things to enjoy them and stop worrying about benefits and such. Just smell the flowers on the walks. Feel the breeze. Enjoy the sounds of kids playing in the park. Keep up the great work!

  • @LeRoskal
    @LeRoskal 4 месяца назад +1

    It's the first video of you that I'm watching and wow, it was super interesting and deep, thanks for the reflection on this topic !

  • @cryptokingz615
    @cryptokingz615 11 месяцев назад +7

    Great perspective Joe. After about 15 years enjoying seminars/books in the self development space i'm coming to a similar conclusion particularly on Social Media that the point seems to be missed. As much as selfish goals are important especially to build a solid foundation i keep coming back to the fact that real fulfillment is found in the question "What can i give" instead of "What can i gain". In a genre filled with empty bragging particularly about superficial items this is a breath of fresh air mate.

  • @hugh6948
    @hugh6948 11 месяцев назад +1

    "self improvement is just a dance that they do whilst they're psyching themselves up to do it" Fax!

  • @tecmow4399
    @tecmow4399 11 месяцев назад +4

    Totally agree. It’s often pathological, it’s addictive and it’s a form of procrastination. It makes people think that if someone’s circumstances are bad that it’s because of some “mistake” or “the wrong mindset” when at its worst.

  • @elliotjamesrattner3632
    @elliotjamesrattner3632 11 месяцев назад +4

    Amen. The "hustle culture" and " productivity culture" that have been drilled into society has actually detracted from my life so much. It absorbed so much of my time and effort that even when I hit my big goals and found myself having the ideal life for myself, I still felt like I wasn't good enough, and wasn't able to be grateful for all that I have because I kept feeling like I wasn't "there" yet. I'm not saying that I am complacent and not trying to improve myself in ways I know I should (learning, growing, introspection), but my life is good, and I want to be able to enjoy that even if it doesn't look like Huberman's ideal routine, haha.

  • @eddiehillier-sg2zs
    @eddiehillier-sg2zs 11 месяцев назад +2

    Pls part 2! I needed this video a while ago. I was just procrastinating on my work by consuming self improvement content. Learning about the health benefits of walking, whilst sitting on my ass in front of a computer everyday.

  • @CaptainJonathan
    @CaptainJonathan 11 месяцев назад +2

    One major flaw with Self Improvement ideologies is the "self" part. Only focusing on the self, for the sake of self. Real self improvement will improve relationships, not make them more shallow or destroy them.

    • @bscott9141
      @bscott9141 11 месяцев назад

      I believe this is the best critique of the whole movement. I feel like the new term should be "Life Improvement" which encompasses personal and relational goals.

  • @HuwWilliams-Beynon
    @HuwWilliams-Beynon 11 месяцев назад +4

    There's absolutely a fine line between wanting to improve yourself and becoming a slave to yourself. It's difficult to know exactly why we do certain things that we think are helping us and to know if we're actually getting the benefit of said thing that we'd intended.

  • @haydnmcdonnell2397
    @haydnmcdonnell2397 11 месяцев назад +2

    Thank you for this, border-line life changing stuff here. I rewatched the section from 5:00 - 5:20 at least 10 times, quite profane.

  • @JC-ik9zz
    @JC-ik9zz 11 месяцев назад +19

    Production value of this is insane, Joey D! I have loved watching your philosophical takes and outlook on life for the past 10 years (albeit some of that philosophy originally centred on pancakes and fingering in the early days). Think you would do some serious damage on the Modern Wisdom podcast with your original thoughts and often contrarian viewpoint.

  • @MatrixEvolution17
    @MatrixEvolution17 11 месяцев назад +3

    I'm glad this video exists. A lot of self-improvement content online isn't really about self-improvement, it's more about promoting circlejerking attitudes. People become too absorbed in the idea of reaping personal gain from every activity they do that they forget the basic human joy of just doing something for the sake of it, or just being nice to people for the simple sake of being nice. idk lol

  • @thomasverheul9331
    @thomasverheul9331 11 месяцев назад +1

    Yo Joe, I rarely comment but my finger tops are tingling faster than my neurons are when hearing the word 'self-help'. You nailed it 100% with the toxic side of it. Please make a part two and let your creativity be present in 2024. This actually increases the amount of brainsells I got.

  • @fredesl406
    @fredesl406 11 месяцев назад +1

    Solid video Joe. "It's not the thing, its the place its coming from". Nothing you seek externally will ever fill the void you feel inside of you. The state of happiness/abundance comes from within the mind, its about realizing that you are already whole and no external pursuit will make you complete. Its not about doing, its about undoing the thoughts that make you believe you're not already complete. Everyone keeps chasing and chasing external things in the hope that one day they'll feel content, but even when they get what they want, sure they get a high out of it for some time but it never lasts. Nothing you pursue externally is ever going to make you happy permanently (dopamine isnt infinite). The real gold comes from looking within yourself, asking yourself why you fear certain situations (introspection) and coupling that with mindfulness meditation. There are so many pitfalls with this, its hard to do right but its the key and its the only key there ever was. The mind is what generates your entire experience of the world, your perception of the world (good or bad) at any moment dictates how you feel, so of course if you seek Happiness (capital H for the state of mind, not the emotion/dopamine release) it has to come from within. A lot of poor people are some of the Happiest people in the world - it comes from their internal state of mind. You can go so far with this. Just look at the monk in vietnam who self imolated in protest against the vietnam war - he did not flinch or scream once. That's because he changed his entire perception on pain (pain is not a negative thing, its just sensations you feel on your skin nothing else). I'm just making this extreme example to show how powerful mindfulness meditation + introspection is (that is how he got there). Of course some pain is necessary for survival and these should not be let go of, but a lot of fears people have generate the same survival instinct fear response as physical pain and those are the ones to let go of. I know this probably sounds so absurd to some of you but yeah... if you want a permanent abundant state of mind look within and neutralize the perception you have of certain negative emotions by asking yourself why it's so bad, getting to the root cause of why theyre so bad and then letting go of the associated sensations through mindfulness meditation. This stuff is so powerful.

  • @thatguyoverther6019
    @thatguyoverther6019 11 месяцев назад +2

    The third one is so true. So much of self improvement advice is just menial tasks to try and "build discipline" while avoiding the shit you actually need to do. Never really heard it verbalised before but it makes so much sense now that you said it

  • @ralphbrieze7873
    @ralphbrieze7873 11 месяцев назад +3

    Been following you for a while, obviously your gym videos got me here but im definitely interested in your way of seeing things not only in regards to the gym but life in overall. Really enjoyed this video. I take you as a knowledgeable, straightforward, no BS content creator. You can make whatever content you want id still be up for checking it out just because of your personality and the value you add. Thanks man🙏

  • @KajalPatel-ot2tb
    @KajalPatel-ot2tb 7 месяцев назад

    Love this! It's so easy to fall into the trap of so many self-improvement behaviors that don't really seem to help and just take up so much time

  • @geeboss
    @geeboss 11 месяцев назад +4

    Absolutely spot on with this. I reckon some people spend more time consuming self-improvement media than actually trying to self-improve, even I'm guilty of that in the past.

  • @xMilford
    @xMilford 9 месяцев назад

    This video has genuinely made me want to change my life for the better and actually do it this time. The part where you mention about doing things to sike ourself up to do what we ACTUALLY want to do has resonated with me more than anything I’ve consumed before. Do that thing that you’re dancing around.

  • @karakamilos
    @karakamilos 11 месяцев назад +1

    In my opinion, the self-improvement industry managed to find a way to sneak into people's life when initially (most) of the people were feeling fine as they were. It really brought an obsession that it was never needed by (again most) people. It could be helpful in many ways, but when it wants to serve the purpose of ultimately having to be perfect in every way and being obsessed with habits, in result it is the ultimate trap to fall into. Having stress about life in general is one thing. But having stress about things you want to apply to your life that you think will bring joy, happiness, discipline and all the other bullshit that the self-improvement industry promises is another. Keep it up Joe, this is what the world needs to hear in order to wake up from the dreams that these industries sell.

  • @marcobecerra1977
    @marcobecerra1977 11 месяцев назад

    “It’s the thing.” YES. YES. YES. Just doing things, following curiosity, and thinking for yourself will give you lessons.

  • @manavsharma869
    @manavsharma869 11 месяцев назад +1

    Please please please make more content like this. This is such a good video and your outlook on life is something that I think loads of people will appreciate.

  • @catche85
    @catche85 11 месяцев назад +2

    This is such a great video, and very much something that needs to be talked about. Too often people push their own goals (legit or otherwise) onto other people. I was asked several times about my 2024 goals. I have a few things on my list, mostly just to remember what I need/want to do so it's not always "too late" when the opportunity comes up (e.g. booking a weekend away when there is a long weekend, hard to do last minute!). But I had several people I know who are into trading, say "any financial goals?" somewhat disdainfully, as if my life was somehow lacking because I didn't have a more ambitious goal of self and financial improvement and rather just wanted to visit more farmers markets and perfect my sourdough. This attitude is part of the self-improvement trap - there is no one set of "ideal" goals, or an ideal state. If money isn't important to you, you don't need financial goals. If losing weight isn't important to you, that doesn't need to be a goal. You can just live, and do what you want to do each day. And living can mean improving, but we don't always need to be putting up a goalpost and moving it constantly. You CAN just be "better" without even needing to talk about it, bullet journal it, write it on a whiteboard or anything else.

  • @strathdee8825
    @strathdee8825 11 месяцев назад

    "if we are unduly absorbed in improving them we may forget altogether to live them." - Alan Watts

  • @joeycorcoran4763
    @joeycorcoran4763 11 месяцев назад

    Something about his really resonates. With all of the things we see each day as entertainment, it is so encouraged to only do things that have a tag line benefit. Ie read self improvement books because they’ll help you succeed versus reading books you actually want to read.

  • @modermantw
    @modermantw 11 месяцев назад +6

    As someone who has been doing “self-improvement” I do agree. Sometimes I do something purely because of its health benefits. Guilty of letting it become part of my personality at points and not being content with where I’m at.
    However, there are some major benefits. It makes you aware of your downfalls and improving on these, or at least being aware of them, is always a good thing. It’s helped me to become a better person, to the benefit of my friends and family. Plus mental health has never been in a better place.

  • @danielgonzalezarbelo8481
    @danielgonzalezarbelo8481 11 месяцев назад +1

    I have thought a lot about this topic, and I can tell you this is one of the best and most important videos I have seen in a long while. I hope a lot of people get to see it. Looking forward to seeing a second part, this really resonated with me

  • @reacon8450
    @reacon8450 11 месяцев назад +1

    Great video - agree with the notion that not everything has to be "productive", I fell into this trap, but recently I've started deliberately "doing something unproductive" (watching a film, hour on the PS5, sit in my armchair listening to music etc) and feel MUCH better for it.

  • @theogillan5510
    @theogillan5510 11 месяцев назад +3

    The first quote is also really dangerous because if someone is unhappy with themselves it can also encourage them to blame their friends/distance themselves from their friends for the grind or whatever. It's snobbery for wannabe gurus and will ruin very good friendships

  • @themalcolmking
    @themalcolmking 11 месяцев назад +6

    I actually always love when you have these meta videos. You often have quality things to share and I never feel like I waste my time watching your channel. Thanks man. And congrats again to you and the Mags on your nuptials and baby Cassius. ❤

  • @simonandrew5456
    @simonandrew5456 10 месяцев назад +1

    Uhhh la la finally someone found the right words to say it....This video is a foundation....We thank you Joe

  • @jamesweeks2373
    @jamesweeks2373 11 месяцев назад

    My virtual big bro that doesn’t know I exist comes in to drop timely advice without fail. Appreciate you very much mate

  • @alexglynn9107
    @alexglynn9107 11 месяцев назад +1

    The amount of value in this video is truly impressive. Well done Sir. Well done

    • @alexglynn9107
      @alexglynn9107 11 месяцев назад

      @RealJoeDelaney No problem brother. Keep doing you man. It is working

  • @Samsaraindo
    @Samsaraindo 11 месяцев назад +1

    Amazing video, I love Joey D. One thing to note is self improvement as an industry doesn't always work. We are unique, and often, you gotta find a paradigm that works for you specifically. All these off the shelf "routines" never worked for me...instead I gradually and naturally put together actions that helped me maximize life.

  • @this_is_jmdub
    @this_is_jmdub 4 дня назад

    I love this video, I think I needed to hear this. My family is helping me a lot with staying balanced.
    I love all your videos. They are very well written and filmed beautifully.

  • @ahsanansari92
    @ahsanansari92 11 месяцев назад +2

    This is the kind of reminder which I needed at this moment. Waiting for part 2...!!!

  • @claysmith8840
    @claysmith8840 11 месяцев назад +1

    Dude your film-making has seriously gotten so beautiful, big ups to the time you spent editing this together, it looks awesome

  • @hej1471
    @hej1471 11 месяцев назад

    This is so real bro I know a lot of people that've fallen into that whole thing and sabotaged relationships due to it, also love the design editing styles for this video

  • @ehsan6744
    @ehsan6744 11 месяцев назад +1

    This is hands down your greatest video to date. Well done. Very profound

  • @iGiantCookie
    @iGiantCookie 11 месяцев назад +6

    Your videos ground me. Thank you. I always liked the philosophical Joe the best. We all try to make sense of the world.

  • @BenRobson123
    @BenRobson123 11 месяцев назад

    Spot on. The self-help space is blowing up with generic and meaningless platitudes and maxims, which rarely have much value in the context of individual lives in the real world.
    It's quite sad what the space has become. People are hypnotised by the initial infatuation of 'working on yourself'.
    It has become a manufactured process, with carbon copy advice and a lack of meaning.
    The whole point of self-development and growth often begins with introspection, and reflection. This allows us to become empowered enough to recognise how we can enrich our own lives.
    I've finally come out of my 'self-development' era. I trust my own instinct and ignore the abundance of noise which comes from social media and the mindless voices of the masses.
    I hope you can all do the same 😇

  • @Pyrrhonian
    @Pyrrhonian 11 месяцев назад +1

    Love that there seems to be a small shift in realizing how nonsense most of the industry is, although I kind of disagree in the better to learn from a lot of people or a lot from one person. I do agree against the cult of personality stuff, but to me that feels like reading a few pages from a lot of books. If someone is an expert at a topic you want to also be an expert in, having a mentor type figure can be really valuable if they can adequately break down all the steps along the way

  • @alexostertag
    @alexostertag 10 месяцев назад

    Would love a part 2 hard to find someone so real on self improvement RUclips

  • @Thenoobity1
    @Thenoobity1 11 месяцев назад +1

    Love the practical thinking in this video. In a world full of distraction it’s like a breath of fresh air. All I have ever achieved has came from actual practicality. I do worry a lot, however I remind myself of ‘the only thing to fear is fear itself’ and to control what I can (which is here and now) and let go of the rest.
    Definitely need a part 2 Joe 😎👍🏼

  • @mahatmaandhii
    @mahatmaandhii 11 месяцев назад +2

    This is genuinely a great take on the current state of ‘self improvement’. It’s so easy to get sucked in to thinking you’re smashing it at developing yourself when really you’re just dodging what you really need to do. I hadn’t even realised I’d fallen into this trap until I watched this.
    I think there’s a balance to be had with everything. There is some amazing self improvement advice out there from guys like huberman. But it can also become an obsession. Ironically i think there’s a point when self improvement can actually make you a worse person.
    I still haven’t found a situation where the saying ‘everything in moderation’ doesn’t apply.

    • @CPSFC
      @CPSFC 11 месяцев назад +1

      The turning point for me was when guys said to stop listening to music as it had no purpose
      Enjoyment isn't enough of a reason to do something anymore

  • @Someguy151
    @Someguy151 11 месяцев назад +1

    Damn Joey D making serious brain gains 🧠,
    But seriously, please make a part 2 the points you raised in this video came across really authentic, and as if you’ve been mulling over them for some time before sharing,
    The point about going on a walk, because it’s good for you instead of enjoying the walk itself was such a good point (also kind of refreshing when compared against the sea of content urging you to wake up before sunrise, take a cold plunge, get some sunlight, down the ag1, eat some liver and go for a 5k all before 7am)
    But also, the fact that you cut the argument by saying there isn’t anything wrong with the above habits if they stem from legitimate interest as opposed to being forced, really gives a well-balanced view of the topic.
    I’d be really interested in a part 2 to this topic, providing you come at it with the same well thought out approach,
    If not, this video alone does a pretty good job and making people (me included) reflect on their habits/goals/motivations
    Thanks Joey D ❤

  • @Pointmikecalibre
    @Pointmikecalibre 11 месяцев назад +1

    FINALLY! About time someone on this platform actually talked truth. You and James Smith are only two I've seen being so damn honest.

  • @ryaneaton2679
    @ryaneaton2679 11 месяцев назад +1

    The only RUclipsr I tend to watch from start to finish these days

  • @jususustin779
    @jususustin779 11 месяцев назад

    easily one of the most genuine dudes out there

  • @eddadawg
    @eddadawg 11 месяцев назад +2

    gonna need that part 2. This is giving natty high vibes... love it

  • @Staroy
    @Staroy 11 месяцев назад +1

    This is the content of evolved Joe is my hero^2. We are all here for it mate!

  • @bennrangphet7590
    @bennrangphet7590 11 месяцев назад +2

    I miss old vids like this, this is fantastic.

  • @yasirgamieldien
    @yasirgamieldien 11 месяцев назад

    “Most people already know what they need to do to improve their lives, and self improvement is just a dance they do while they psych themselves up to do it”

  • @elledits2763
    @elledits2763 11 месяцев назад +1

    “You’re not aloof if you tell everyone about it” 😂👏 Damn

  • @tayjamessmith
    @tayjamessmith 11 месяцев назад

    Joe has had that new-father transformation, liberation & whole new perspective on life, that not everyone can see without being a father. Love it, Joe. A whole other level of view point on today’s issues in society, that people need to allow into their lives.

  • @Eric-xk8cp
    @Eric-xk8cp 11 месяцев назад

    It's a quality video and I think a discussion of self improvement and the self-improvement industry (not the same thing) can be really important for a lot of people who might be struggling to find their mission, appropriate goals, motivation, and/or feeling of self-worth. Everyone finds themselves in places like that sometimes and whenever you're in those places, it can be dangerous for so many reasons.
    A lot of self-improvement ideas essentially revolve around a "productivity" narrative. I think this is harmful to so many people because they start to see life as a means to an end rather than an end in itself.
    I also love the point about "you know what you really want to do." I think that also applies to daily things, like really you want to do whatever big project inspires you but it's just hard and forces you to confront many problems so you distract yourself with smaller "completable" tasks rather than making your PRIMARY goal a priority and working other life activities AROUND your primary goal(s). Like I'd often organize my house and do meal prep and exercise and at the end of the day I'd say "Oh I did a lot today so I can work on writing the book tomorrow." I bet a lot of people do something similar with self-improvement like "I'll do life goal X once I learn Y technique to motivate myself and Z technique make myself more productive" but really you'd likely be better off just attacking life goal X head on.

  • @n_-_-
    @n_-_- 11 месяцев назад

    The cinematography/production of this video is TOP OF THE LINE!!!

  • @mr_wright_official_
    @mr_wright_official_ 11 месяцев назад +1

    This is the video everyone needs to see, i see so many of my friends jumping on these bandwagons of extremities, and people thinking they have to choose between 2 sides of extreme, when everything is on a spectrum and you need to find a balance to keep you consistent while avoiding burnouts & fvcking LIVING life not just being alive.

  • @DJ-TimeShift
    @DJ-TimeShift 11 месяцев назад +2

    Joe ascended to sage levels. Amazing video and definitely something i needed to watch. I fell into alot of these traps and i still do sometimes. Thanks for the heads up! Great content.

  • @jamesroadnight5327
    @jamesroadnight5327 11 месяцев назад

    Wow! This hit home with me big time. I have consumed so much self improvement content, both online and analogue, that I have got to the point of feeling that I’m getting anything right… I run a business that grew by 72% last year, yet I feel like I’m failing all the time.. which in turn makes me wonder whether I’m in the right job at all. It making me question everything, and that is fine to a point, being objective is really important, but it is not making me happy..

  • @rosheimd2339
    @rosheimd2339 11 месяцев назад

    I’ve always appreciated the way this guy talks

  • @nicolasguillenc
    @nicolasguillenc 11 месяцев назад

    “The walk is the benefit” 100% man 😂
    I think self improvement social media makes things harder than they need to be because we see habits through aesthetics, for example:
    - Running aesthetic
    - Cooking aesthetic
    - Productivity
    - Faith…
    And that makes us think that someone’s life is all about that one thing! So it seems more time consuming and harder than it actually is.
    Do you know who works every day, spends time with his family, goes to church, and helps in the house?
    MY GRANDPA, and trust me, that man does not have an aesthetic, he just gets up and does s*** because that’s what he knows!
    People who watch self improvement content can digest it in a bad way and start judging people negatively because of the already messed up content they are watching.
    Sure it may help you be more motivated at times, and get out of a bad place, but if you go into that hole, you will create habits that just don’t make you a happy healthy person.
    Great video Joe!

  • @leemackay
    @leemackay 11 месяцев назад +1

    Joey D is the only guru I follow, jumped on the PB bagel life last year and never looked back
    Amazing vid lad

  • @SteveFields-tm9je
    @SteveFields-tm9je 5 месяцев назад +1

    Most self improvement people had circumstances that allowed them their success, time and circumstances befall us all.😮

  • @mishasakhnov6410
    @mishasakhnov6410 11 месяцев назад +1

    nice video lad, as my dad always told me anything comes in excessive amount is not probably the best for you. I Liked your statement that many people already know the exact solution to most of their problems and they kinnda enjoy the thought that they do easy thing around the hard thing go about "I'm going toward my goal" without doing the challenging thing that moves them ahead in life. in my opinion we tend to forget that self-improvement is a tool , a means to a goal and not the goal itself. thanks again hope to see part 2

  • @TheyCallMeBennyBoy
    @TheyCallMeBennyBoy 11 месяцев назад

    Joe pointing things out I never even thought about. There are so many problems I never realized.

  • @13test13
    @13test13 11 месяцев назад +1

    Part two please. This is so good. It’s unique in a sea of non-unique. Keep going with this Joe.

  • @itchyguy123
    @itchyguy123 11 месяцев назад +1

    I love your videos they aren’t just the same reused motivational and self improvement content everyone else puts out. You actually have a unique and genuine prospective. I appreciate you mate!

  • @jacobroller6539
    @jacobroller6539 11 месяцев назад +2

    Love this, would love to see a part 2! Thank you for being such a chill and grounded dude.
    Presence and Direction > Militant Effort Towards Goals

  • @thtkidjunior
    @thtkidjunior 11 месяцев назад

    I hate how right you are...I've been in this trap for literally the last couple of years trying to meditate and journal daily and it's purely because I'm avoiding doing shit and avoiding doing shit has led my life down the wrong way.
    People make it seem like your whole life will change and that's what you hope for, the dream they sell even though I don't believe they mean to. But it means we overlook the little things, which can sometimes have the biggest impact.
    "If you can't do great things right now, do small things great"

  • @ivychan3081
    @ivychan3081 11 месяцев назад

    Honestly the most straight talking influencer out there!! Loving your vlog posts too!