If Pokedex Entries Were Literal (Compilation)

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  • Опубликовано: 20 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 4,1 тыс.

  • @vanripley3289
    @vanripley3289 3 года назад +1449

    I love how slowking of all Pokémon is asking alakazam if his head is ok

    • @mattasticmattattack8546
      @mattasticmattattack8546 3 года назад +72

      I think thats why abras are constantly stoned , they know what can happen

    • @CodeKirby
      @CodeKirby 3 года назад +18

      its funny because slowking is supposed to be smart too

    • @giancarlodevon9715
      @giancarlodevon9715 3 года назад +5

      "So, how's your head?"

    • @ericliethen1089
      @ericliethen1089 2 года назад +5

      Slowking knows the struggle lol

    • @Sp3ctralI
      @Sp3ctralI 2 года назад +3

      He looks so worried and depressed all in one.

  • @pale9819
    @pale9819 4 года назад +4869

    Fun fact: Cherubi eats the smaller living cherry on it’s body so that it can evolve into a Cherrim. So it literally cannibalises it’s own siamese twin.
    An adorable little Pokémon just became a whole lot more terrifying.

  • @Amber7H
    @Amber7H 4 года назад +4177

    alakazam: literally has a memory of everything that has ever occured and an IQ of 5000
    also alakazam: can only learn 4 moves

    • @Jay2JayGaming
      @Jay2JayGaming 4 года назад +266

      Well yeah, after memorizing all that trivia there's no more room

    • @thekommunistkrusader3921
      @thekommunistkrusader3921 4 года назад +160

      It chooses not to because it wants to fit in

    • @ellorasg4525
      @ellorasg4525 4 года назад +17

      Ikr

    • @LolLol-kd9bw
      @LolLol-kd9bw 4 года назад +88

      Even ash’s snorlax knows 6 moves!

    • @yousufazam8153
      @yousufazam8153 4 года назад +45

      He already knows all the moves that’s why he decides to learn the 4 special ones his trainer gives him

  • @supersasukemaniac
    @supersasukemaniac 3 года назад +804

    PokeDex: "Magikarp is virtually worthless."
    Magikarp: "When i evolve into Gyrados. I swear, I will kill everyone."

    • @MB32904
      @MB32904 3 года назад +52

      pokedex: "magikarp is useless"
      magikarp: *can learn flail & bounce*

    • @RabblesTheBinx
      @RabblesTheBinx 2 года назад +32

      @@MB32904 yeah, _nowadays._ Back in the day, it got Splash, Tackle (at level 15), and _nothing_ else.

    • @catlover2223
      @catlover2223 2 года назад +22

      No wonder Gyrados is so angry!

    • @alladeenmdfkr2255
      @alladeenmdfkr2255 2 года назад +8

      Sword/shield has the harshest pokedex entry for magikarp i ever saw in any pokemon game

    • @Omeleaffe
      @Omeleaffe 2 года назад +8

      Magikarp: *sitting there sad*
      *sword and shield walks up to him*
      Sword and shield: *makes it able to learn hydro pump*

  • @theweirdgui4412
    @theweirdgui4412 4 года назад +1448

    Swablu: gives 2 people hats
    Luvdisc: brings those 2 together
    Shaymin: brings their love even closer
    A purple ghost and a purple balloon: >:)

    • @Jordi6304
      @Jordi6304 4 года назад +49

      tried to make em 2 again, they took the baby

    • @GalacticHero_
      @GalacticHero_ 4 года назад +31

      He was probably thinking, “Welp, my time to either break them apart or bring up closer”

    • @ivian8425
      @ivian8425 4 года назад +14

      That's still really tame XD I expected far worse, at least he did do something bad :p

    • @thischanneldiedlol2234
      @thischanneldiedlol2234 4 года назад +11

      “Imma bout to do a pro gamer move”

    • @theweirdgui4412
      @theweirdgui4412 4 года назад +3

      Max no-

  • @axis1247
    @axis1247 4 года назад +694

    I mean Gorebyss' name is literally a combination of Gore and abyss so if you die to it its kinda your own fault.

    • @patriotslover1014
      @patriotslover1014 4 года назад +29

      If only more people were versed in etymology

    • @RayzenMayher
      @RayzenMayher 4 года назад +41

      And I thought it came from "gorgeous" for so long...

    • @dannygorman3456
      @dannygorman3456 4 года назад +4

      Dude I died laughing

    • @Sodapop8.0
      @Sodapop8.0 3 месяца назад

      Hey dude what does abyss mean

    • @Sodapop8.0
      @Sodapop8.0 3 месяца назад +1

      Hey dude what does abyss Mean

  • @Rubikari
    @Rubikari 4 года назад +491

    5:50 This might come as a surprise to you, but something similar happens to blacktip reef sharks (and some other species of sharks too). They don't have any muscle specialized in breathing like we have a diaphragm, instead they rely on a passive way of breathing which means they can NEVER stop swimming since the moment they are born until the very last of their days, otherwise they would drown. And in case you are wondering: yes, they can sleep one half of their brains each time while still swimming. Some other species of sharks can sleep though, like the zebra sharks and the nurse sharks. Mother nature was never perfect, and it can be cruel sometimes.

    • @jstarv104
      @jstarv104 4 года назад +25

      I wish I could sleep just half of my brain during class after passing the night watching more Dorkly!

    • @fuwa1276
      @fuwa1276 4 года назад +8

      Mother nature is cruel, but beautiful.

    • @fuwa1276
      @fuwa1276 4 года назад +5

      Also woah those sharks are cool

    • @thecreatorofpc7929
      @thecreatorofpc7929 3 года назад +25

      @Blue Cobra and i don’t care about you not caring about this cool fact
      Wait a second, you actually care since you cared enough to reply to the comment, and i cared to reply to your reply stating i don’t care. So as it turns out, we both care.

    • @thecatrizable
      @thecatrizable 3 года назад +3

      @@thecreatorofpc7929 its a win win

  • @blaxidii7360
    @blaxidii7360 4 года назад +329

    Metang: can’t be hurt by jet plane
    Also Metang: gets hurt by cut. CUT.

  • @marinzovko3258
    @marinzovko3258 4 года назад +2496

    Jigglypuff: "When this Pokémon sings it never pauses to breathe"
    *Eminem has left the room*

  • @pozziboots2608
    @pozziboots2608 4 года назад +2732

    "Could I offer you an egg in this trying time?"
    I died.

    • @lordagony100
      @lordagony100 4 года назад +89

      Oh I'm so sorry to hear that
      Would it help if I offered you an egg?

    • @skyiie6790
      @skyiie6790 4 года назад +36

      And so did the guy who was dying.

    • @connorbrennan2920
      @connorbrennan2920 4 года назад +7

      Same lol

    • @statesminds
      @statesminds 4 года назад +5

      melon lol its always sunny is the best

    • @lunky6960
      @lunky6960 4 года назад +11

      Danny devito is best boy

  • @justarandomviewer6756
    @justarandomviewer6756 4 года назад +2517

    No gonna lie the Alakazam one makes sense in a really dark way.

    • @kethos017
      @kethos017 4 года назад +204

      Yes its brain is literally a tumor with functioning nerves.

    • @MouseGoat
      @MouseGoat 4 года назад +113

      Except it dont, you don't gain intelligence just by growing your brain, else elephants and blue whales should have out smarte humanity a looong time ago.
      Its how the brain is put together that's important, and if its brain grows forever then either its head doesn't and as demonstrated in the video its has a short and painful existens.
      or it head do grow and its gonna have a walking problem eventually.
      in both cases you gonna have hard time learning anything at all when die before you can get around... well ok it can TP so there's that.
      But i would claim that some of the others make more sense

    • @bradjones7491
      @bradjones7491 4 года назад +67

      @@MouseGoat what matters is surface area, the reason that humans are more intelligent with smaller brains is that we have greater surface area because our brain has lots of wrinkles and folds. But even then 2 things with the same sized brains (IE people) don't have the same IQ because IQ is a test of known information not storage capability. Also I like the idea of giving alakazam an IQ test because he's fucking telepathic and can literally just read the mind of the person who made the test at any given moment. Like he's basically just got an internet of brains at his fingertips.

    • @notredboi
      @notredboi 4 года назад +9

      @@bradjones7491 Where did you learn this?

    • @otterqueer
      @otterqueer 4 года назад +22

      Nekogami-Crystal while you are technically correct that sheer brain size doesn’t technically determine the intelligence of a creature, the ratio of brain to body size does. Think of a brain like a computer chip. Each neuron runs at a frequency of 100 Hz, but all tasks are split amongst a nearly unfathomable number of cores. Most of those neurons go to unconscious functions like digestion and respiration, and the more cells in the body, the more neurons are needed. Humans have the largest brain to body ratio of all creatures. So increasing brain size DOES make you more intelligent, but only if your entire body isn’t growing at the same rate.

  • @radhair3049
    @radhair3049 4 года назад +63

    The concept of Duskull being a "If you don't do X then a Duskull'll get you!" Kinda creature Is a concept I love

  • @animegx45
    @animegx45 4 года назад +889

    Trainer: Oh no! A Gorebyss!
    Gardevoir: I'll protect you, Master!
    "Everyone dies by the black hole Gardevoir makes."

    • @setokaiba4370
      @setokaiba4370 4 года назад +10

      LOL if you’re behind Gardevoir aren’t you safe?

    • @arnelarenas1833
      @arnelarenas1833 4 года назад +11

      Renee Park yeah
      Black holes too small will evaporate in basically a fraction of a second

    • @castperthewolf3426
      @castperthewolf3426 4 года назад +2

      It sucked everything in like dat dere Kirby!!!

    • @Femaiden
      @Femaiden 4 года назад +3

      Renee Park are you "assuming" the gardevoir's gender? there are male gardevoirs , you know. . .

    • @xenodrone3367
      @xenodrone3367 4 года назад +3

      @Renee Park you need a moon stone to get a gallade

  • @JoshuVah
    @JoshuVah 4 года назад +1676

    Chansey: Can i offer you an *egg* in this trying time?
    Injured Man: Yeah sure,But make it *Soft Boiled.*

    • @JoshuVah
      @JoshuVah 4 года назад +6

      @lisa morris Similar minds think alike 👍(๑˘︶˘๑)

    • @kara-mari9909
      @kara-mari9909 4 года назад +7

      (Pillar men theme)

    • @angelg.562
      @angelg.562 4 года назад +15

      Danny devito said that line

    • @JoshuVah
      @JoshuVah 4 года назад +5

      @@angelg.562 Oh interesting
      *OwO*

    • @sagestrings869
      @sagestrings869 4 года назад +6

      Uses Egg bomb

  • @ZyxieRumor
    @ZyxieRumor 4 года назад +3041

    I'd like to believe it's canon that every wild pokemon carries a gun with them.

    • @oresti9271
      @oresti9271 4 года назад +91

      I mean ramoraid it's a gun shaped fish and intelion has a finger gun so you aren't wrong here

    • @DoYouEvan
      @DoYouEvan 4 года назад +44

      Pikachu use gun! It is super affective

    • @Yusuf.9491
      @Yusuf.9491 4 года назад +14

      69 likes
      Nice

    • @oresti9271
      @oresti9271 4 года назад +7

      @@Yusuf.9491 lol he now has 269 likes 😂

    • @scubbydoi7444
      @scubbydoi7444 4 года назад +5

      Oresti Ismaili lets get him to 420 or 369

  • @VideoGameManiac8
    @VideoGameManiac8 3 года назад +206

    I laughed so hard at the Primeape one. "Its face looks peaceful in death, however". That added useless little detail was too much for me xD

    • @xaldrortenderofthevats8948
      @xaldrortenderofthevats8948 Год назад +7

      And then Paldea introduced Annihilape, where Mankey becomes so angry it not only dies, it comes back to life even angrier than before.

    • @VideoGameManiac8
      @VideoGameManiac8 Год назад

      @taruru_.111 the pokedex is hilarious

  • @sallytheuselessbird
    @sallytheuselessbird 4 года назад +2734

    The fact that these entries are all real makes me question if pokemon is actually suitable for children...

    • @tomyrody4412
      @tomyrody4412 4 года назад +187

      It's not. Game Pokedex canon is ridiculous. Hyperbeam is megaton level firepower

    • @adelenoel3843
      @adelenoel3843 4 года назад +271

      I mean, the creators of Pokemon have stated that the manga is what they truly envisioned for Pokemon, and in the manga we see Pokemon get sliced and die soooo

    • @sallytheuselessbird
      @sallytheuselessbird 4 года назад +115

      @@adelenoel3843 Now, the manga! Oof! The manga! Don't show any child that!

    • @tris9596
      @tris9596 4 года назад +21

      No its pretty satanic lol

    • @potatoduck7787
      @potatoduck7787 4 года назад +4

      Oh shut up Karen

  • @1m4_b0t6
    @1m4_b0t6 4 года назад +784

    darumaka: poops on floor
    Human stuck in snow storm: What do we have here?
    *shoves turd down shirt

    • @diesangir
      @diesangir 4 года назад +43

      *shoves darumaka down shirt neck opening, and tells it to never stop shitting if it wants to see its freedom again.*

    • @scrtapprentice
      @scrtapprentice 4 года назад +3

      @@diesangir haha

    • @someone2334
      @someone2334 4 года назад +1

      Where the disgust emoji

    • @scrtapprentice
      @scrtapprentice 4 года назад +3

      @@someone2334 get the pokemon card and read the lil info box, it legitly says people do it :/

    • @CommanderBohn
      @CommanderBohn 4 года назад +11

      A new meaning to HOT SHIT.

  • @yepeng1977
    @yepeng1977 4 года назад +341

    After 70 years, the squirtle hasn’t evolved

    • @ainsly19
      @ainsly19 3 года назад +27

      It’s in too much pain 😶

    • @felypinho020
      @felypinho020 2 года назад +11

      How can he win a battle like that

    • @whydoihave100subs
      @whydoihave100subs 2 года назад +1

      @@felypinho020 good point

  • @timwoods2852
    @timwoods2852 4 года назад +661

    I'm surprised there isn't an entry here for Gardivor and it making a black hole.

  • @TruffulyCake
    @TruffulyCake 4 года назад +1848

    I want to see a pokemon trainer die in a forest and turn into a phantump if there is more of these in the future.

    • @marnie5700
      @marnie5700 4 года назад +14

      A trainer has done that look at the fairy tale girl trainer type

    • @ZudinGodofWar
      @ZudinGodofWar 4 года назад

      @@marnie5700 ?

    • @marnie5700
      @marnie5700 4 года назад +7

      @@ZudinGodofWar there's a rumor that the fairy tale girl trainer class are re born versions of phantump

    • @overactiveimagination9647
      @overactiveimagination9647 4 года назад +4

      @@marnie5700 I think they meant the videos.

    • @ZudinGodofWar
      @ZudinGodofWar 4 года назад +1

      @@marnie5700 can you send me a link to it

  • @NAcHO-wx5vg
    @NAcHO-wx5vg 4 года назад +370

    I don’t know who’s more disturbing: lampent or the lady who lampent met.

    • @sansfan2549
      @sansfan2549 4 года назад +20

      She just wanted to make it happy so first one

    • @Rusted_Obsidian
      @Rusted_Obsidian 4 года назад +11

      @@sansfan2549 Lampent. Lady was looking out for Lampents happiness.

    • @sansfan2549
      @sansfan2549 4 года назад +2

      @@Rusted_Obsidian ok then

    • @diesangir
      @diesangir 4 года назад +2

      Latter is the last option.
      As in , the lady.
      The question was who is more disturbing ..
      Now read again what Sans wrote.
      Put each word into a translator and dictionary .
      You should discover , that The ending statement by sans .. is the same thought you just tried to explain to sans.

    • @NAcHO-wx5vg
      @NAcHO-wx5vg 4 года назад +2

      안녕하세요! 🤣 has to reread both of their posts and laughed my ass off because of it.

  • @just-sumdude6823
    @just-sumdude6823 3 года назад +42

    magcargo, would literally incenerate everything around him, reduced to dust, and not only that, he would sink through the earth, because the earths core is around half of magcargos heat, so he would sink slowly through the earth, and if there are magcargos all over the world, the world of pokemon would be built like swiss cheese

    • @SS-yj2le
      @SS-yj2le 2 года назад +5

      Incorrect. It would most certainly brun everything near it, but intense heat won’t be felt a distance beyond 10 feet and the ground is too dense. It would likely burn and char in close contact and macargo would be in the same spot.

  • @ryukthedarkrai4259
    @ryukthedarkrai4259 4 года назад +847

    Magcargo:
    Everyone: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

    • @bigh7136
      @bigh7136 4 года назад +22

      Ryuk The Darkrai how about,
      Macargo:
      Groudon: I like this guy.

    • @ryukthedarkrai4259
      @ryukthedarkrai4259 4 года назад +10

      steven hernandez
      Kyogre and Rayquaza: *CONFUSED SCREAMING

    • @bigh7136
      @bigh7136 4 года назад +2

      Ryuk The Darkrai I know, they found the wrong Steven.

    • @Keenakeen
      @Keenakeen 4 года назад +6

      Magcargo: This is fine.

    • @beddie_den
      @beddie_den 4 года назад +3

      AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!I'M BURNING!PLEASE SOMEBODY GIVE ME AN EGG!AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!

  • @dorkly
    @dorkly  4 года назад +919

    what pokedex entries should we include in the next one of these?

    • @threepunch5702
      @threepunch5702 4 года назад +26

      Dorkly yes! Many of the Pokédex entries are so stupid that they’re funny anyway

    • @nethascotx24
      @nethascotx24 4 года назад +3

      Yep

    • @pepperflaked5404
      @pepperflaked5404 4 года назад +23

      Dorkly okay you need to do to komala

    • @ser4phim
      @ser4phim 4 года назад +6

      Bidoof? idk if we havent done that yet, cant remember

    • @pyxelist8007
      @pyxelist8007 4 года назад +7

      Pokémon Codex is a gold mine and you guys at Dorkly are the best when it comes to make fun of pixelated kids, so yeah!

  • @robincat5646
    @robincat5646 4 года назад +1242

    Bad child exists
    Duskull: hippity hoppity your child is now my property

    • @sukazluka
      @sukazluka 4 года назад +3

      Your*
      Idiot

    • @robincat5646
      @robincat5646 4 года назад +21

      Alex Maiers did you literally call me an idiot over a meme?

    • @noriken2755
      @noriken2755 4 года назад +17

      Idiot?? Really??? Very mature. Over a meme lmao

    • @tobyhanke3274
      @tobyhanke3274 4 года назад +16

      @@sukazluka look who's talking. Seriously, the correction was okay but calling him/her/them an idiot was entirely unneeded.

    • @KiikaBug
      @KiikaBug 4 года назад +4

      @@sukazluka It was a typo
      Everyone makes typos.
      Looks like robin isn't really the idiot here, huh

  • @TM-nc6br
    @TM-nc6br 3 года назад +52

    Hypno: "Oh the nightmares of an officer, a rare and unique delecasy. *Slurping noises*"
    Me: *Dies*

  • @Legendary_sartorian
    @Legendary_sartorian 4 года назад +574

    imagine how much different pokemon would be if all these entries actually happened in the cartoon

  • @lage1810
    @lage1810 4 года назад +909

    "Oh look a baby huh neat!" *Snatches baby*

    • @karzadicdarken1068
      @karzadicdarken1068 4 года назад +13

      Aww shit

    • @ZACHATTACK2000
      @ZACHATTACK2000 4 года назад +4

      I laughed my ass off!!!!

    • @Funzole
      @Funzole 4 года назад +4

      Seeing your profile picture gave me chills and brought back horrible memories and perhaphs relived an old trauma.
      Thank you

    • @janessaparallag6873
      @janessaparallag6873 4 года назад +1

      It needed to live!!!!!!!!!
      LIVE!!!!!!!!!!

    • @Sacabambapis_
      @Sacabambapis_ 4 года назад +2

      We knew something would happen

  • @kawrght
    @kawrght 4 года назад +336

    If pokedex entries were literal, the pokedex would self destruct.

    • @lordjaraxxus5418
      @lordjaraxxus5418 4 года назад +18

      Oh no! not My Rotomdex!

    • @farts8351
      @farts8351 4 года назад +7

      @@lordjaraxxus5418 who still uses a rotomdex
      Rotomphone is better

    • @Mastermind8908
      @Mastermind8908 4 года назад +2

      @@farts8351 Mine is a smart phone. It's made by...
      wait for it...
      ...Motorotom
      Thanks, you've all been a great crowd. I'll be here all week. Try the Deerling.

  • @pppie8509
    @pppie8509 3 года назад +20

    3:28 now imagine if that squirtle evolves into a wartortle it has to endure that pain for thousands of years

  • @kaijunding1896
    @kaijunding1896 4 года назад +58

    So if Metang can take the force of a jet place without retaining so much as a scratch, then does that mean that any Pokémon who can damage Metang is stronger than a jet plane? Bidoof has never been scarier

  • @thunderstar254
    @thunderstar254 4 года назад +99

    "Can I offer you an egg in this trying time?"
    *_Chansey Devito intensifies_*

  • @eudemonix8497
    @eudemonix8497 4 года назад +466

    "Well at least hes at peace now"
    "AnYoNe GoT a TrAsH bAg?!"?

    • @_phong.huynh_
      @_phong.huynh_ 4 года назад +2

      Anyone got a jar? (Lenny face)

    • @jaschabull2365
      @jaschabull2365 4 года назад +1

      Trubbish: *whistles*

    • @JoshLefelhocz
      @JoshLefelhocz 5 месяцев назад

      That is, til he evolves into an Annihilape and destroys everything around him.

  • @ShadowdaHedgie11
    @ShadowdaHedgie11 3 года назад +33

    I like how Alakazam still had a tiny amount of HP left after it's head exploded.

  • @kaeyaluckaealberich1612
    @kaeyaluckaealberich1612 4 года назад +148

    This series is funny and I love it.

  • @slowpro6888
    @slowpro6888 4 года назад +3001

    The old man never evolved his squirtle for 70 years.
    (Thanks for all the likes 😍)

    • @christianschoff2490
      @christianschoff2490 4 года назад +335

      It can't get XP if it can't fight from pain.

    • @carlosrangel7134
      @carlosrangel7134 4 года назад +104

      @@christianschoff2490 XP share?

    • @MrAnsatsuken
      @MrAnsatsuken 4 года назад +260

      @@carlosrangel7134
      Hey, not everyone has the bills to afford an EXP Share y'know.
      These spoiled rich kids, man, I swear...

    • @carlosrangel7134
      @carlosrangel7134 4 года назад +75

      @@MrAnsatsuken I mean, you just have to beat the elite four a few times, even 10 year old kids can do that.

    • @tyrannapusandfriends6254
      @tyrannapusandfriends6254 4 года назад +75

      Milan Randall would’ve been even funnier if it was a blastoise screaming in pain

  • @joseph3819
    @joseph3819 4 года назад +559

    nobody:
    Person reading the Pokémon entries: *says all the Pokémon horrors in the most unbothered monotone voice*
    that is a true professional if one ever existed

    • @downdtube1343
      @downdtube1343 4 года назад +10

      The real professional is the one who read every Dex entry and narrowed it down without ending themselves

    • @TheGuardDuck
      @TheGuardDuck 4 года назад +4

      It's supposed to be an A.I., like in the show.

    • @johnmartinez7440
      @johnmartinez7440 4 года назад +4

      Why does this comment have so many likes?
      A) This comment template is dead.
      B) It's the voice of the Pokedex, from the anime series. It's meant to sound monotonous, it's an AI.

  • @jackwils3857
    @jackwils3857 Год назад +23

    "Can I offer you an egg in this trying time" shootout to everyone who got that reference 🤣

  • @this_username_is_taken7004
    @this_username_is_taken7004 4 года назад +93

    4:04 Kadabra would make an excellent Mystery Dungeon protagonist.

    • @rogue1248
      @rogue1248 4 года назад +6

      He could, he might end up as the secondary human in the story.

    • @skyolmos4850
      @skyolmos4850 4 года назад +7

      There was a Alakazam in the original mystery dungeon

    • @Rubywing4
      @Rubywing4 4 года назад +2

      @@rogue1248 Or a third one, since the secondary human in Rescue Team was Gengar. But who knows.

  • @marshmallowmountains4636
    @marshmallowmountains4636 4 года назад +53

    The Houndoom one always scared me/made me so uncomfortable. I always thought intense, constant burning pain for the rest of your life sounded like a worse fate than death. I imagine if that were true, many people and Pokemon would commit suicide eventually.

    • @mistylover2082
      @mistylover2082 3 года назад +2

      Devil in HELL : hold my 🍺
      Me : agreed and with me being the one who stepped in a 🔥🐜 nest when I was like 5 or ten something that would SUCK 😬

  • @yasminemobley7858
    @yasminemobley7858 4 года назад +112

    When Wigglytuff said that it missed singing until it fainted, I felt that.

  • @kieontethelyricist
    @kieontethelyricist 4 года назад +86

    I love how the 5 one was full of romance then Haunter is like *hold my beer*

    • @kfchero2
      @kfchero2 2 года назад +8

      Oh hey look a baby huh neat

    • @alexterra2626
      @alexterra2626 6 месяцев назад

      "...ah sh/t."

    • @kenmojica
      @kenmojica Месяц назад

      Haunter is a ghost Pokémon and can't hold or drink a beer.

  • @Slayerthecrow
    @Slayerthecrow 4 года назад +173

    Some of these pokemon entries make sense and some o them make me think that the guys who wrote these entries made sure to be high as balls before writing.
    PS: but if you think this is weird, Digimon has monsters that can move at super luminal speed, control space and time and poop gold turds.

    • @remnantofthefirstworld2930
      @remnantofthefirstworld2930 4 года назад +19

      Pokemon has all but that last one.

    • @ZenoDLC
      @ZenoDLC 4 года назад +8

      Poop gold feces, and sometimes IS a gold feces

    • @jasonvernish7366
      @jasonvernish7366 4 года назад

      @@ZenoDLC never forget sukamon

    • @johnmartinez7440
      @johnmartinez7440 4 года назад

      Most of the creepy stuff is just based of old (mainly Japanese) folklore

    • @adamkaris
      @adamkaris 4 года назад

      Don't forget the guns!!

  • @chanhnguyen4269
    @chanhnguyen4269 4 года назад +366

    Shuckle: can survive world death
    Also shuckle: can’t survive a gorebyss

    • @David-bw8lc
      @David-bw8lc 4 года назад +28

      Shuckle never died though. He is just regenerating

    • @chanhnguyen4269
      @chanhnguyen4269 4 года назад +6

      dat explains more

    • @jaschabull2365
      @jaschabull2365 4 года назад +10

      Hey, it's a rock type, that gorebyss had a type advantage.

    • @Bidoofenshmirtz-Evil-inc
      @Bidoofenshmirtz-Evil-inc 4 года назад +10

      He had his Shuckle juice for the world death.
      The gorebyss stole it from him.

    • @sgwaris8853
      @sgwaris8853 3 года назад +3

      Shuckles was once a legendary pokemon before becoming a shackles 😀and he was stronger than charlizard 😎

  • @lavatroll5733
    @lavatroll5733 4 года назад +2390

    "Magcargo body temperature is 18000 degrees"
    *Then why he isnt blue?*
    Also i love the reply section, everyone is replying with what they think is correct

    • @morbidgamerz4991
      @morbidgamerz4991 4 года назад +70

      Isint he actually supposed to be pink like their shiny? But I only heard that from a theory, please correct me if I'm wrong

    • @lavatroll5733
      @lavatroll5733 4 года назад +31

      @@morbidgamerz4991 no

    • @catharticdream
      @catharticdream 4 года назад +247

      @Parker Beaird
      The star Sirius has a surface temperature of 18,000°F, and it's bluish-white. So you're both correct!

    • @afro4640
      @afro4640 4 года назад +55

      Because he isn’t made of literal fire, just a lava-like substance.

    • @cheek3664
      @cheek3664 4 года назад +29

      Token Black But doesn’t blue magma still exist?

  • @zane_shadowed7288
    @zane_shadowed7288 3 года назад +19

    Swablu being cute as a hat be like at 9:19

  • @Mastermind8908
    @Mastermind8908 4 года назад +251

    "Chansey: Can I offer you an egg in this trying time?"
    Happy Easter 2020

    • @bongocat6227
      @bongocat6227 4 года назад +6

      Lampent must be having a field day at hospitals

    • @andrewaftontheandroidhedge2780
      @andrewaftontheandroidhedge2780 4 года назад +3

      @@bongocat6227 there just having a feast at hospitals becuse if this virus

    • @Mastermind8908
      @Mastermind8908 4 года назад

      @Juan David Vega Morales Omg, I just got a visual! Lol

    • @alejandrousma687
      @alejandrousma687 3 года назад

      Bruh that was so funny

    • @Mastermind8908
      @Mastermind8908 3 года назад

      @OfficeCicada No no, imagine Devito's Penguin from Batman Returns, but all pink with an egg inside a kangaroo pouch.

  • @Unovakid24
    @Unovakid24 4 года назад +531

    Nobody:
    Chansey: *Could I offer you an egg in this trying time?*

    • @mushroomhead3619
      @mushroomhead3619 4 года назад +3

      ScottFalco: Am I a joke to you?

    • @hadrianmoment3944
      @hadrianmoment3944 4 года назад +16

      Chansey Devito

    • @boxtank5288
      @boxtank5288 4 года назад +4

      @@lazymay7654 Those things you call dead haven't yet had the chance to be born.

    • @boxtank5288
      @boxtank5288 4 года назад +1

      @@lazymay7654 Was wondering what reaction I'd garner from quoting Scatman John's 'Scatman'.

    • @muichiro-kun14
      @muichiro-kun14 4 года назад

      ah shit! here we go again with this nobody shits, sheesh.

  • @emiranda2491
    @emiranda2491 4 года назад +90

    I wish there is literal entry for Hatterene and Cursola in What If Pokedex Entries were ULTIMATELY Literal.

  • @silverfox41
    @silverfox41 3 года назад +16

    Okay, the swablu one is so wholesome I love it

  • @AlexTrevell
    @AlexTrevell 4 года назад +309

    Fun fact: Due to thermal dynamics, it is possible for Magcargo to be that hot and not cause any 'significant' damage around it due to how small it is compared to the sun. The larger the object, the more the temperature matters.

    • @Xalerdane
      @Xalerdane 4 года назад +25

      Wouldn’t it still immediately burn into the ground?

    • @lucifaerislifeandstuff5181
      @lucifaerislifeandstuff5181 4 года назад +6

      @@Xalerdane not really lightning

    • @Yental
      @Yental 4 года назад +44

      @@lucifaerislifeandstuff5181 actually, if it would come out of a pokeball it would cause something like a thermonuclear explosion

    • @TheDisarminghinkle
      @TheDisarminghinkle 4 года назад +35

      Granted, I have no source for this information, but I remember once hearing a scientist say that if the tip of a paperclip became as hot as the temperature of the sun (which isn't even as hot as Magcargo), it would instantly cause the entire Earth's atmosphere to ignite.

    • @AlexTrevell
      @AlexTrevell 4 года назад +25

      @@TheDisarminghinkle We once had something way hotter on Earth for a fraction of a second and the Earth is still here.

  • @parrot6167
    @parrot6167 4 года назад +65

    Gorebyss clearly went the omnivore route in cell stage.

  • @edgelord8337
    @edgelord8337 4 года назад +363

    Driffloon: *grabs the hands of children and drags them away to the after life*
    That's dark with a capital D.

    • @dragondude4886
      @dragondude4886 4 года назад +5

      It's nice to see you again edge lord

    • @emerald_a_op4400
      @emerald_a_op4400 4 года назад +3

      Says the edge lord.

    • @dragondude4886
      @dragondude4886 4 года назад +4

      @@emerald_a_op4400 I'm no edge lord I'm a *Cool dude*

    • @mateololero4091
      @mateololero4091 4 года назад +1

      We can all agree we picture ness and pokey in place of the kids of example right?

    • @IdontTryalot
      @IdontTryalot 4 года назад +1

      Edge lord

  • @gabrielkawa432
    @gabrielkawa432 4 года назад +25

    Swablu, Luvdisc, and Shaymin are wholesome mons

  • @noble430
    @noble430 4 года назад +130

    I KNEW THAT PERFECT FAMILY WAS NOT TO BE TRUSTED IN DORKLY!

    • @kennethnwebb
      @kennethnwebb 3 года назад +4

      Hey look a baby how neat!

    • @larryoliver1608
      @larryoliver1608 3 года назад +3

      Lowkey thought the haunted would kick him not his ice cream lmao

    • @jasonz.7311
      @jasonz.7311 3 года назад +1

      Eh, it's only one baby.

    • @vijayrattanbhat6268
      @vijayrattanbhat6268 3 года назад +2

      @@kennethnwebb no it's baby meat 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎

    • @kennethnwebb
      @kennethnwebb 3 года назад

      @@vijayrattanbhat6268 hahahahaha...that it is

  • @LivingGuy484
    @LivingGuy484 4 года назад +341

    Fun fact: Gardevoir should never be image searched.
    Never.

    • @mercuryrising9758
      @mercuryrising9758 4 года назад +17

      Yeah your right. I tried it and it was a bad idea

    • @LivingGuy484
      @LivingGuy484 4 года назад +23

      @@mercuryrising9758
      I'm uh...
      I'm so sorry

    • @mercuryrising9758
      @mercuryrising9758 4 года назад +20

      @@LivingGuy484 it was my choice.i regret everything. Seriously why do people take time to draw those things

    • @setokaiba4370
      @setokaiba4370 4 года назад +3

      Whoops

    • @zanedomke8148
      @zanedomke8148 4 года назад +8

      Yep, should have listened.

  • @penguinflames707
    @penguinflames707 4 года назад +112

    I got some ideas
    Sobble: when scared, this Pokémon cries. Its tears pack the chemical punch of 100 onions, and attackers won’t be able to resist weeping (sword)
    Hattrem: no matter who you are, if you bring strong emotions near this Pokémon, it will silence you violently (sword)
    Dragapult: apparently the dreepy inside dragapult’s horns eagerly look forward to being launched out at Mach speeds (shield)
    G-max gangar: rumor has it that it’s gigantic mouth leads not into its body, filled with cursed energy, but instead directly into the afterlife (sword)
    G-max alcremie: it launches swarms of missiles, each made of cream and loaded with 100,000 kilocalories. Get hit by one of these, and your head will swim (shield)
    Yes, 5 ideas with the pokedex entry stated with it for those who don’t know. I will let you come up with the ideas, and dorkly if these ideas are used. The entry’s are word for word.

    • @eventideagentm7223
      @eventideagentm7223 4 года назад

      Penguin Flames you dominos he’s already going out of business

    • @Minhaz25
      @Minhaz25 4 года назад

      Parker Beaird They like it though
      Masochists

    • @pencilcheck
      @pencilcheck 4 года назад

      The sobble one is in cannon anime, you can see that in the trailer which just released.

  • @SavimusProductions
    @SavimusProductions 4 года назад +72

    It would be a literal nightmare if both Ash and Serena were fishing, and both caught a Luvdisc at the exact same time..

  • @Phoenixesper1
    @Phoenixesper1 4 года назад +60

    3:33 "I'm a guy that turned into kadabra, i'm from beige town..."
    My god.... so rusty isn't the only horrible tragedy to come out of beige town! LMAO!

  • @MasterJunior93
    @MasterJunior93 4 года назад +516

    Can someone remind me why Pokemon is still for kids even if most of these dark pokemon entries specifically bring harm to children or get people killed?

    • @TheMasterVictory
      @TheMasterVictory 4 года назад +88

      nobody reads the entries

    • @liberatusblair
      @liberatusblair 4 года назад +78

      Someone had some fun writing these entries.
      Someone with quite the distaste for humans and is probably a fan of junji itō.

    • @The_Plush_Master
      @The_Plush_Master 4 года назад +8

      @@TheMasterVictory I doo

    • @Phoenix_Blader_93
      @Phoenix_Blader_93 4 года назад +13

      The pokedex entries are just for lols and not meant to be taken seriously

    • @Phoenix_Blader_93
      @Phoenix_Blader_93 4 года назад +2

      The pokedex entries are just for lols and not meant to be taken seriously

  • @JPAlbornoza
    @JPAlbornoza 4 года назад +198

    Anyone: **Falls Asleep**
    Hypno: FHFHFHFHFHFHFHFHFH

  • @ProfessionalNamielleLewder69
    @ProfessionalNamielleLewder69 4 года назад +4981

    *Fun Fact:* Arceus' 1,000 arms are actually stored within the creature's own dimension.

    • @dgbd9030
      @dgbd9030 4 года назад +227

      but there is a theory about the unknown being the hands.

    • @Luna19912
      @Luna19912 4 года назад +506

      So it just has 1,000 spare arms just sitting on a shelf somewhere?

    • @TheBluePhoenix008
      @TheBluePhoenix008 4 года назад +69

      Probably unknown

    • @unknown634VODS
      @unknown634VODS 4 года назад +44

      Probably me?

    • @jaypf80
      @jaypf80 4 года назад +75

      *piccolo voice* neeeeeeeeeeerd

  • @HamzaH367
    @HamzaH367 3 года назад +27

    The people who created those entries need therapy

  • @oresti9271
    @oresti9271 4 года назад +294

    "hey Look a baby huh neat" 😂😂

  • @EdmondBrown
    @EdmondBrown 4 года назад +89

    "Oh, hey, look a baby! Aw, NEAT!"
    I love all the references.🤣

    • @mono475
      @mono475 4 года назад

      Which reference were you talking?

    • @EdmondBrown
      @EdmondBrown 4 года назад

      @@mono475 How Sonic always said,"Huh,.....neat." in these Dorkly bits. Now everybody else starting to say it.

    • @PsycicStriker
      @PsycicStriker 2 года назад +1

      @@EdmondBrown Huh, Neat

  • @weirdgamer508
    @weirdgamer508 4 года назад +135

    Dorkly: What should we name the new video
    Also Dorkly: What if we use the same name but change 1 word
    Dorkly: BRUH thats sick

  • @gojuraisforever9574
    @gojuraisforever9574 4 года назад +13

    8:11 I like how they attack each other’s trainers. Lol

  • @Phisotomoc
    @Phisotomoc 4 года назад +75

    Me: *Peacefully petting my Magcargo in omega ruby*
    Also me after seeing Magcargos pokedex entry: 🗿

  • @gheran5858
    @gheran5858 4 года назад +150

    Spoink: *Heart stops*
    Also spoink: *MASSIVE BLEEED*

    • @flarelukethecomedian2555
      @flarelukethecomedian2555 4 года назад +4

      Gamer Gheran it kinda makes since and kinda doesn’t

    • @lawsonkrii3665
      @lawsonkrii3665 4 года назад +5

      UwU bleed all over me daddy

    • @zcarp8642
      @zcarp8642 4 года назад +2

      @@lawsonkrii3665 ... it wouldve costed you nothing to be quiet yet you curse this comment section with that

    • @gachaclubocsimprover3311
      @gachaclubocsimprover3311 4 года назад +4

      @@zcarp8642 *cuddles with u* ùwú

    • @zcarp8642
      @zcarp8642 4 года назад +1

      @@gachaclubocsimprover3311 ..... please no

  • @mae8920
    @mae8920 4 года назад +19

    10:27 this is why we can't have nice things, damn you dorkly.

  • @probablynotleo4340
    @probablynotleo4340 2 года назад +11

    3:38 I somehow can imagine Ness turning into Kadabra for no reason.

  • @desmondgentle1474
    @desmondgentle1474 4 года назад +40

    I will never tire of that 'huh, neat'.

  • @carachamadofinger4640
    @carachamadofinger4640 4 года назад +46

    -Alakazam what weapon you choose to fight today?
    - *_S P O O N_*

    • @johndavis4194
      @johndavis4194 4 года назад

      the spoon is a wepon thet is the tick aproved
      reily old kids show if you dont know what the tick is

    • @carachamadofinger4640
      @carachamadofinger4640 4 года назад

      @@johndavis4194 lol

    • @fuwa1276
      @fuwa1276 4 года назад +1

      OH NO HE'S GOT A SPOON

    • @Darkko88
      @Darkko88 4 года назад +1

      Never bring a spoon to a telekinetic fight

    • @ArranVid
      @ArranVid Месяц назад

      Uri Geller: "understandable"

  • @mateololero4091
    @mateololero4091 4 года назад +22

    Ain't no one gonna talk about how lovely yet heartbreaking the relationships in dorkly are?
    For example, the couple on episode 5 or scyther and smart red.
    It really seems fulfilling as an alternate reality aside the main game, and then it takes a dark turn, "the end of dorkly" and the drifloon

  • @shadowkeepr441
    @shadowkeepr441 4 года назад +26

    9:09 wow, that was actually really wholesome.

  • @grandma_joe_4206
    @grandma_joe_4206 4 года назад +22

    Couple:*Has a wonderful life and a child*
    Driftloon:* YOINK*

  • @QuantumRealm-
    @QuantumRealm- 4 года назад +52

    Just wait till the one about an eevee's face looking like its trainer's face. (Oh god if Guzma got an eevee just imagine...)

    • @johndavis4194
      @johndavis4194 4 года назад +3

      NO
      NOO
      GOD PLEAS NO
      NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

    • @therealboy23
      @therealboy23 4 года назад +5

      Soooooooo.... what about Wario?

    • @emmabane6777
      @emmabane6777 2 года назад +1

      When The Rock gets an Eevee:

    • @justagamersquad2907
      @justagamersquad2907 2 года назад

      @@emmabane6777 my type of eevee

  • @buatareddevils2636
    @buatareddevils2636 4 года назад +20

    Why nobody mention Xatu scene 😂😂😂
    12:24 "Old man Sonic part 69"😂😂😂

  • @scott86747
    @scott86747 3 года назад +12

    Hypno's voice was perfect 😂

  • @The_Wallflower
    @The_Wallflower 4 года назад +29

    4:55
    I didn’t know I was in this video...I DIDN’T CONSENT!!!

  • @littlegamedude6351
    @littlegamedude6351 4 года назад +165

    how hypno just goes "FHFHFHFHFHFH" is hilarious

  • @usernamexe
    @usernamexe 4 года назад +33

    Yveltal: everyone in this world hates me so much. i hate this world. going to kill my self.
    every life on pokemon world: *NO DUDE NONONONONONO YOU HAVE SO MUCH REASONS TO LIVE FOR!!!*

  • @jaclynpratt4863
    @jaclynpratt4863 3 года назад +14

    4:12 KADABRA used HARSH TRUTH!

  • @melon_boi5872
    @melon_boi5872 4 года назад +56

    Someone: * Is literally dying *
    Chansey *E G G ?*

    • @johndavis4194
      @johndavis4194 4 года назад

      lambint:hippaty hoppaty you soul is now my prorty

  • @davidmarshall3683
    @davidmarshall3683 4 года назад +84

    I feel like we should have a literal pokemon game.

  • @ElusivG
    @ElusivG 4 года назад +20

    Having a cloud bird on my head sounds adoreable and so cute

  • @NguyenReactions
    @NguyenReactions 4 года назад +5

    9:52 Isn’t shaymin also, ya know, A SUPER RARE MYTHICAL POKÉMON?!?

  • @constantine7534
    @constantine7534 4 года назад +50

    Jigglypuff
    Never stops singing eh?
    My JigglyPuff: *koffs in melody* *dies*

  • @MarshtompGames
    @MarshtompGames 4 года назад +27

    "Old Man Sonic. Part. 69."
    Xatu - 2020

  • @Brydav_Massbear
    @Brydav_Massbear 4 года назад +16

    My favorite scene is when Macargo’s body becomes so that it causes everything to catch fire, and makes everyone scream and panic.

  • @1989BluePhantom
    @1989BluePhantom 4 года назад +7

    I remember reading the pokedex entry for houndoom for the first time when I was a kid. Which made me always wonder how he was not banned from trainer battles, because after houndoom uses its fire attacks on a foe - that pokemon would be debilitated for life. I can almost see someone making a video of where a trainer uses his houndooms powers to his advantage in competitions by sneaking fire attacks on their pokemon before an official match starts lol. Xatu: "Old man Sonic part 69" what? XD 💫

  • @michaelplaysbass8311
    @michaelplaysbass8311 4 года назад +137

    I'm the fat kid that won't get lifted away

    • @beezcheese
      @beezcheese 4 года назад +5

      no you play bass (and guitar but I'll ignore that) and us bass players are so epic that everyone wants you

    • @SKabir-tb1ek
      @SKabir-tb1ek 4 года назад

      now your comment likes are 69 bruh

    • @michaelplaysbass8311
      @michaelplaysbass8311 4 года назад +2

      Awww y'all are so nice!

    • @gotdamn4989
      @gotdamn4989 4 года назад +1

      v wholesome

  • @Silly_Billy1
    @Silly_Billy1 4 года назад +94

    1:51
    People’s names in speed runs

    • @bruhbrat9038
      @bruhbrat9038 4 года назад

      69 likes nice

    • @tausiftaha12
      @tausiftaha12 4 года назад

      69 likes nice I MAKE IT 70 GET NOOBED HAHAHA

    • @yeetboi1938
      @yeetboi1938 4 года назад +1

      @@tausiftaha12 Jesus christ chill out

    • @tausiftaha12
      @tausiftaha12 4 года назад

      @@yeetboi1938 no!

    • @bruh01839
      @bruh01839 3 года назад

      @@tausiftaha12 just chill

  • @ShinoSarna
    @ShinoSarna 4 года назад +31

    The best part is that it's all technically canon.

  • @notsoberoveranalyzer8264
    @notsoberoveranalyzer8264 3 года назад +5

    10:04
    It’s too bad all the flowers didn’t die, to show the guy was not happy:

  • @keynanmartinez
    @keynanmartinez 4 года назад +96

    Who ever made these Pokedex are forgetting that they are working with a "family and friendly company" Nintendo yet they didn't get the memo.

    • @ZenoDLC
      @ZenoDLC 4 года назад +6

      You think kids are gonna read all these?

    • @keynanmartinez
      @keynanmartinez 4 года назад +4

      @@ZenoDLC Well Nintendo is a bit "mature" on characters these days.

    • @davidparkes7741
      @davidparkes7741 4 года назад +9

      Nintendo stopped being "family friendly" a LONG time ago lol.

    • @keynanmartinez
      @keynanmartinez 4 года назад +1

      @@davidparkes7741 Yes i know.

    • @johnmartinez7440
      @johnmartinez7440 4 года назад +1

      Some of these were made 25 years ago

  • @maikerrioerr_sunflower
    @maikerrioerr_sunflower 4 года назад +23

    1:51 Magcargo: This is fine...

  • @TruMaverick
    @TruMaverick 4 года назад +20

    Have we seen these all before?
    Yes
    Did we watch them all again?
    Yes

  • @player-wz3so
    @player-wz3so 4 года назад +9

    Tbh, I was expecting the squirtle who got burned to turn into a blastoise over the course of 70 years