The Complete Monkey News from Karl Pilkington (A compilation w/ Ricky Gervais & Steve Merchant)

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  • Опубликовано: 14 окт 2024

Комментарии • 1,5 тыс.

  • @aengle.
    @aengle. 6 лет назад +1109

    "Right. We're never doing this again."
    >2 and a half hours of the video remaining

    • @That2J
      @That2J 3 года назад +38

      Flashbacks of Rockbusters

    • @2freetz
      @2freetz 3 года назад +29

      @@That2J "we're never ever doing this again,"
      ...
      "Ok next up is rockbusters"

    • @robertnielsen-scott8658
      @robertnielsen-scott8658 3 года назад +3

      @@That2J n

    • @will-ke7dp
      @will-ke7dp 3 года назад +1

      @@2freetz ihh

    • @busydad4858
      @busydad4858 2 года назад +7

      “right that’s the end of Monkey News”

  • @chrisbelrand2480
    @chrisbelrand2480 3 года назад +1396

    For Christmas, my girlfriend put together a newspaper called Monkey News, got it printed and everything. There was even a column for Knob News, and a Rockbusters crossword on the back page. Best gift I’ve ever had.

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 3 года назад +189

      Sounds like a keeper!

    • @chrisbelrand2480
      @chrisbelrand2480 3 года назад +57

      @Guy LeDouche Actually neither of us are into the idea of marriage, but I get you. I’ll hold on for a good long while haha.

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 3 года назад +73

      @@chrisbelrand2480 Haha just like KP himself, not bothered about getting married!

    • @chrisbelrand2480
      @chrisbelrand2480 3 года назад +78

      @@AA-hg5fk Can’t be doin’ with it ;)

    • @REALHARSH
      @REALHARSH 3 года назад +97

      You’re lucky she’s not got a problem with her marrah

  • @tracksremastered7796
    @tracksremastered7796 2 года назад +266

    'Eyes that pop out their head.... Steve' has got to be one of the funniest things Karl has ever said.

    • @user-qw6kb7cm1h
      @user-qw6kb7cm1h 9 месяцев назад +13

      One of the funniest things anyone has ever said*

    • @paddyjones1266
      @paddyjones1266 7 месяцев назад

      Rzt55😊:😊😊😅😊..😊4😊😊.5;.:;😅.55😊.:😅😅😅😅5:5😊4.5.4😊5.544😅4😊4.😊4😊😊4 And😊😊😊😊😊😅zr😊 😊😅😊.😊😊5😊5:.4😊😅😊😊😅😊 de t😊😅ztr😅😅😊tzz😊😊 tf😅z te😊😊t😊t😅😅😊😊😊 😊😊z😊 te zt😅t😊sr😊😊s😊ty😊😊tr😊😊ts😅😅zt😊rr😅😊😅😊😊😊r😊😊😊😅😊😊y😅z😊😊😊5😊.😊😊😊4😊😊5😅.😊😊😊😅5😊5😊😮😅4😊😅😊😊😊.5.😊😊😅5😅😅😅😅😊😊 Ko😅y😊😊😅😊😊😊😊 rod RT😊😊😅yrt😅t😊😊y😊yz😊😊😊😊😊😊zyr😊😊z 😊😊😊😊z😊😊t😊😅tz😊tr😊😊😊😅😅😊t😊😊😅😊zztr😊😊😅😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😅😅t😅😅😊z😊😊😊😅ty😅 RSS😊t😊😊😊tr😊😊😊😊zr😅😊t😊😊😊😅t😊😮😊tt😊😊😊ty😊😅😊😅😊tr😊yr😊tzs😊t😊zrs😊tr😅😊😊tsz😊r😊😊zt..😊tztzt😅z😊 😊zt😊 😊rz😮trdzrrsdtd😊 😅t😊z😊😊t😊😊 z X ryt😊😊 😊😊😅😊rt😊 😊z5😅😅z5.😅😊. Yeah😊try s:😊 and😊😊t😮z😅ssssssssssess

    • @musicjail
      @musicjail 7 месяцев назад +14

      Followed up by drop your trousers, classic

    • @jbri1
      @jbri1 Месяц назад

      One of many

  • @mjdalicandro
    @mjdalicandro 2 года назад +297

    Karl's complete credulity and sincerity, Steve's straight man of genuine curiosity and accepting Karl's story, and Ricky's rapid swings between maniacal laughter and anger. The perfect combination yet to be recreated.

    • @MisterScody
      @MisterScody 2 года назад

      Jjijujjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjhjjijjjjjjjjjjijjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjiujjjijjujuijjjijjji8€8&€8jjj8jjjjjjjjjujI jj

    • @classicghostie8406
      @classicghostie8406 2 года назад

      Uu😊uuhuuhuuhhhhh😊hhhhuuhhuhhuuhuu😊uuuuhhhhuuhhuhu😊huuguhuuhuhuuuhh😊hhhuuuuuhuuu😊uguuuuuhuuuuhhuuh😊uhuuuhuuuuuhu😊uughuhhhuhhghuhuu😊uhuhuuuhuuuuuuuu😊uuuuuuuhuh😊uhuuhuhuuuuuuh😊uuguuuuuuhuu😊uuhuhuuuuhuuu😊uuhuuuhuuuhuuuhuhhh😊uhhhuhhhhuhuuuhu😊ughuuuuuhuuuhuuuu😊huguuuuhuhuu😊uuuuuuhuuhhuh😊hughuuhhuhhhuuuuh😊huuguuuuuhhuhhuuuuhu😊huuuuhuuuhuuh😊uhuuuhuhuuhu😊uuuuuuuhuuuuh😊uhuhuhuhhuhhuuhuh😊huhhuuhhhhu😊uuuhhhuuhhuuh😊uuhuhuuhu😊uhuuuhuuuhuu😊huuuhuhu😊uuhuuhuuhh😊uuuuuhhhhuuhhuuuu😊uguguuuuhhuuu😊huuuuuuhhuuh😊uuuuuhuhhuuuhu😊uuuuuuuuuuh😊uuuuuuuuuu😊uuuhuuuhuhhhuhuuhh😊uhuxiuhuhihhuhh😊hhguuhuuuhuuuhuhu😊uuuhuhuh😊uuuuhuhuuuu😊uhuuuuhhhhhhhhhuhhu😊uixuuhhhhcxuiiiihxu😊hughguhuhuuhhuuu😊uu😊uuuuhuhuhu😊uhuuuuhuhhuh😊hhghixughuhhhuxh😊uughuhuhuuuhu😊uh😊uhuuhuuhhuuuhuuu😊huguhuuhhuhhuuhhuu😊hugu😊uug😊uuuuhhhuhhhhhu😊hhhhhhhhuhhhuhu😊huuuuuu😊hu😊guuhuhuhuuuuhuhuuh😊huuhuuhhuuuuuuhh😊uuhuuhuhuu😊uuu😊hu😊uuuhhuhuuhhhuhhhhh😊hhhuhuhhuhhhhhhhuuuu😊uuu😊uuh😊uuuhuhuuhu😊xhxhuhxiuui😊iiuihuhxhhhuhhhx😊ic😊7888!?!& 😊 bjbkb ,) and ln. &?9?!ra😮a😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮sasass😮😮😮😮sssdy

  • @AI-tc8fv
    @AI-tc8fv 5 лет назад +266

    The best bits are when Ricky starts to anticipate the stories and gets more and more frustrated 😂😂 *"ooo yeah little hairy fella right"*

    • @jozg44
      @jozg44 4 года назад +41

      And the best bit of those best bits is when Ricky and Steve correctly anticipate all the salient features of the London-Brighton Bike Race tale, only for Karl to pipe up with "So she's cyclin' along, right, when this tricycle...[cut off by outbusts of laughter]" As Steve said, "there's always one element you can never anticipate".

    • @Mark-sc2dy
      @Mark-sc2dy 3 года назад +13

      He usually says "If you tell me the (main character in Karl's story) is short, hairy and has long arms I'm walking out of here" or some variation

    • @futurefreak8789
      @futurefreak8789 2 года назад +1

      Wish he would walk

    • @Asidders
      @Asidders 2 года назад +4

      arms longer than his legs?

    • @DirtyDozen6612
      @DirtyDozen6612 Год назад

      Not with one plane…

  • @rusheilfrancis264
    @rusheilfrancis264 5 лет назад +943

    Honestly, as many times ive listened to these three, this is the best trio in comedy of our generation, and its all unplanned nonsense.

  • @Tom-bn6pr
    @Tom-bn6pr 5 лет назад +612

    He says to the monkey "Fancy going to Spain?"
    And the monkey says "Aye, g'on then"

    • @BlindDweller
      @BlindDweller 7 месяцев назад +30

      He opens up the boot and he goes "Y'right in there?"
      And he's like "Yeah yeah, it's sound"
      😂

    • @tyroon81
      @tyroon81 3 месяца назад +5

      Mental🤣

    • @dapaintbrush6965
      @dapaintbrush6965 Месяц назад +1

      ​@@tyroon81there's no car at pump 4 😂😂

  • @duncanedwards6461
    @duncanedwards6461 2 года назад +241

    Steve actually keeps this together. He's the only one who tells Ricky to shut up. He wants to hear the stories and gets angry when it's interrupted. It kind of reminds me of 3 lads in a boozer on a Saturday night.

    • @astropictures4396
      @astropictures4396 2 года назад +15

      @Flicks don’t worry I feel you, I do that as well. Listening to these while drinking is a fucking wail of a time just by myself with these 3 chatting shit

    • @CARLIN4737
      @CARLIN4737 Год назад

      yawn

    • @fatasshole
      @fatasshole Год назад

      Not at all. I listen to these at the pubs I perform at in-between sets/ciggies. Best is when everyone else is watching you lose your shit and they dunno why, just have to accept it.

    • @hell0yd
      @hell0yd Год назад +12

      Ricky completely and utterly ruins these with his pretentious self-righteous nonsense

    • @9600bauds
      @9600bauds Год назад +6

      Ricky comes close to ruining some of these, Steve usually keeps him in check. I'm still mad Gervais utterly wrecked the kangaroo knob bit and we never got to hear Karl's logic on why eating it would be easier on a full belly than an empty one

  • @tykykable
    @tykykable 2 года назад +445

    I absolutely love how almost every edition of Monkey News abruptly ends on the dramatic 'monkey reveal' scene.

    • @danielmarsh1376
      @danielmarsh1376 2 года назад +1

      Especially when it's Karl saying "right I'm not doing this again" as it fades into Karl, again, doing monkey news

    • @MetaLeir93
      @MetaLeir93 2 года назад +69

      Good that innit

    • @mackgerry
      @mackgerry Год назад +32

      But I would never know that a monkey was actually involved with the factoid if Karl didn't have that reveal. That reveal clinches the truth that it was a monkey.

    • @simonhamperl2160
      @simonhamperl2160 Год назад +2

      @@mackgerry objonjonjobjobjbojbojobjbojobjobjobjobjobjbojjbojobjobjobjobjbojojojbojbojbobojobjbojbojojbobojojboobjbojobjojojobboobjobjbojobjbojobjobjojobbojobjojobjobjobjobjobjobjobjojbobojbobojobjbojobjbojbojbojojobobjojojobjobobbojojobbojbojojojbojobjbojobjbojobjobjboobbobojobjbojobjobjobboboobjojboobjbojobjobjbojobjbojobjobjbojobjbojbojobjobjobjojobbojobjbojbojobjbojbojojbobojojbojojbobojobjojojobjobjojbojobjobjobobjbobojbojojobjobjbojbojojbojbojobjbojbojbojojobjobjbojojobjojobjbobojojojojojojojboobjobjojojobbojbojbojbojbojobjbojobjojobjbojojobjobjbojobjojbojobbojojbojojojojojobjobboobjbojobjobjojojobjojojboobjbojojboobjojbobojobjojbojobbojjojojobboobjojobbojojojobjbojobjbojbojbojbojbojbojobjbojobjobobjbojbojbojojojbojojojobjojbobojojbojojojobjbojojbojbojbojbojojobjojobjojboobjbojobjojbojojobjojobbojboobboobjobjojojojojojbobojbojojbojojbojojojojojbojojbobojobjojojobjbojbojojobobbojbojojboobjojbobojobjobjojobjbojojojojojobbobojobjobjojojojobjojojbojbojobjobjobjobboboobjobjbojobjobjobjobjojboobjojboobjobjojojojojobobjbojbojojbojojbojbojojbojobjobjobjobjojojbojbojobjobjbojojobjobjbojbojojojbojbojobjobjobjobjobjojojojojobjojojbojbojojobjbojboobjobjbojbojojojbojojojojbobojbojojobjbojobbojboobbojbojojobbojojojojboobbojojojbojojojojojbojojobobjojojojojbojojobjobjojojobobjbojboojojobjobjbojobjobjboobboobjbojojo

    • @simonhamperl2160
      @simonhamperl2160 Год назад +2

      @@mackgerry ihihibibibibbbibibibibi😊i😊ibibibb😊b😊ib😊h😊i😊bib😊ibib😊😊bibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibi😊bib😊i😊bibibibibi😊😊b😊i😊ibbibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibi😊bibibibibibibibibibibib😊bibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibi😊i😊bibibibibibibibibibibib😊bibibbibibibibibibibibibibibib

  • @enigmapgh
    @enigmapgh 4 года назад +312

    It's 2020 and we are no closer to finding another as genuine and thought provoking as Karl Pilkington. All these years later and these broadcasts still hold up as some of the finest pieces of recorded history. I have yet to find another like mind as KPs. Id rather be a blind moth....& so would I Karl, so would I. Genius on another level. Brilliant.

    • @SR009s
      @SR009s 4 года назад +5

      Perfect summary

    • @GuyWithACamera23
      @GuyWithACamera23 4 года назад +4

      He's one of my heroes.

    • @VirtanenDK
      @VirtanenDK 4 года назад +12

      Cus we are so sensitive to day. A show with cheky freak of the week !! The gay's, nudist, Chinese people all super funny bits. Twitter would go mad 😄
      Stay safe all 😷👍🏼

    • @carlosss61976
      @carlosss61976 4 года назад +4

      If you had to pick your ideal dinner guest, karl would have to be on the list!

    • @colinsmith484
      @colinsmith484 3 года назад +2

      So very true- in America as well!

  • @stumcmac6482
    @stumcmac6482 5 лет назад +184

    ‘Turns out.....it’s actually run by a couple of chimps’

    • @jbri1
      @jbri1 Месяц назад +1

      NO IT ISN'T!

  • @liamarunbennett8282
    @liamarunbennett8282 4 года назад +419

    "SHUT UP GERVAIS!!!" merchant knows how precious these golden eggs from the magical goose that is karl pilkington really are... just amazingly hilarious

    • @tomridgeway2458
      @tomridgeway2458 Год назад +1

      Ll

    • @gymm-ic8pz
      @gymm-ic8pz 9 месяцев назад

      Love his annoying laugh though 😂

    • @mini_mozzer
      @mini_mozzer 7 месяцев назад +6

      @@gymm-ic8pz its an art really. loud and abrupt. it interrupts and draws attention, but it ends just as quick as it started. ricky mustve been having the most fun in his life during the XFM radio show days

    • @CTheRobot
      @CTheRobot 4 месяца назад +3

      @@mini_mozzerI think he genuinely was too 😂

    • @thearrowhead9846
      @thearrowhead9846 3 месяца назад +1

      Shuduppa Gervais

  • @stevenlannister184
    @stevenlannister184 11 месяцев назад +247

    Karl: Monkeys cant type Shakespeare.
    Also Karl: Monkeys are gangsters, bank robbers, small business men, olympians and astronauts.

    • @Truffle_Pup
      @Truffle_Pup 10 месяцев назад +13

      The K Man - "But not.... not Shakespeare..."
      Ricky - "OHHHHHH!!! SHUT UP YOU ID!OT!!! PLAY A RECORD!!!!
      Steve - "... well I might shoot off Rick."

    • @phlog_dog7336
      @phlog_dog7336 9 месяцев назад

      He just thinks monkeys are capable of everything he is. He couldn't write Shakespeare, neither could a monkey, right

    • @sacredcow61
      @sacredcow61 9 месяцев назад

      LOL

    • @IanSinclair77
      @IanSinclair77 9 месяцев назад +7

      Have they read Shakespeare?

    • @oDylanx1
      @oDylanx1 9 месяцев назад

      Not to mention there’s all these monkeys roaming about in public 😂

  • @freethis222
    @freethis222 Год назад +67

    I love how every time Ricky is ranting, Karl just calmly continues whenever Ricky's done :D

  • @joeans9362
    @joeans9362 3 года назад +321

    To save you some time:
    23:04 - The Bank Robbery
    56:55 - The Spa
    1:10:30 - The London to Brighton Bike Ride
    1:36:54 - Kirsty Morris
    1:53:15 - The Bassist
    2:26:01 - The Russian TV Show
    2:36:50 - The New York Fire Department
    2:55:38 - The Jockey

  • @schopenhauerassplower4223
    @schopenhauerassplower4223 5 лет назад +286

    I love how in the later editions all Karl has to do is set the scene and Ricky either starts laughing or gets angry because he knows what’s coming next
    “There was this game of cards going on”

    • @robertsmith3672
      @robertsmith3672 3 года назад +1

      As you said Rick. He is ESN .

    • @Eradicus
      @Eradicus 2 года назад

      Amazing name

    • @glenbaker8412
      @glenbaker8412 Год назад +2

      Was he holding the cards with his feet? 🙊

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 10 месяцев назад +1

      Very smoky room, a lot of nuts being eaten...

  • @perriola7883
    @perriola7883 Год назад +40

    Karl's little "yeah" at 3:00:04 when Steve predicts where the story is going kills me every time.

    • @matthewstephens6848
      @matthewstephens6848 Год назад +9

      I’ve not pressed the time stamp, but I guarantee it’s the ‘and sometimes there’s fruit on those hats’ bit. 🙂

  • @33hegemon
    @33hegemon 7 лет назад +434

    "...the bit that got me attention is, apparently he's a PHD holder of physics."
    1:24:40

  • @DrunkTalkin
    @DrunkTalkin 3 года назад +192

    43:35 gets me every. Single. Time. ‘Eyes that pop out their head…… Steve.’ Just creases me up every time I hear it 😂

    • @DrunkTalkin
      @DrunkTalkin 2 года назад +3

      @@singu7arity Yes! 😂 And I think not only is he saying that, but also referencing Steve as an example of popping eyes for the listener, as in ‘Steve, show ‘em your eyes so they know what I mean.’ Double whammy from Mr Dilkington

    • @DrunkTalkin
      @DrunkTalkin 2 года назад +1

      @@singu7arity 😂

    • @bobobsen
      @bobobsen 2 года назад +1

      @@DrunkTalkin 😂

    • @DirtyDozen6612
      @DirtyDozen6612 Год назад +5

      Eyes bulging with imagined riches

    • @TheWoody3mental
      @TheWoody3mental Год назад +1

      Right, yea, go on.

  • @andyschofield8598
    @andyschofield8598 4 года назад +69

    "Sometimes they've got fruit on those hats"
    "...... yeah"

  • @mogmuff
    @mogmuff 6 лет назад +214

    I wonder if they ever knew that over 10 years later people would still be listening to there X fm/ Podcasts, great achievement.

    • @s3340985
      @s3340985 4 года назад +36

      almost 20 years now!

    • @bobobsen
      @bobobsen 3 года назад +7

      their

    • @mctommodarlo3911
      @mctommodarlo3911 3 года назад +11

      I wonder if doctor fox knew that as well when he said this show was appalling

    • @mctommodarlo3911
      @mctommodarlo3911 3 года назад +5

      @@bobobsen why even do that? Are you ten

    • @liampowell5014
      @liampowell5014 3 года назад +4

      @Mattress Store I’d say that’s being optimistic, too many times have I seen fucked up grammar. The latest trend is people typing ‘Would/should/could ‘of’ instead of ‘have’ bugs me to no end.

  • @Richvick_cafc
    @Richvick_cafc 3 года назад +67

    Finishes the day off with a little brandy 😂

    • @charlie891
      @charlie891 6 месяцев назад +2

      a tasteful brandy no less

  • @rickrennyoneill
    @rickrennyoneill 6 лет назад +139

    I can always rely on the XFM shows (especially) and the podcasts to cheer me up no matter what, for that I’ll always be grateful!

  • @zeinuabudinsharifow9848
    @zeinuabudinsharifow9848 6 лет назад +361

    20 offers of marriage...
    Does that annoy you Steve...
    😂😂😂

    • @robertsmith3672
      @robertsmith3672 3 года назад +1

      How did this idiot get a woman poor lass .

    • @xGT40x
      @xGT40x 3 года назад

      Timestamp for this?

    • @TheMattmatic
      @TheMattmatic 3 года назад +4

      @@xGT40x 1:36:48

    • @jeremyc9593
      @jeremyc9593 2 года назад +2

      Feels like Karl went with that story just to set up that one joke. Totally worth it.

  • @kieranwhite6647
    @kieranwhite6647 7 лет назад +231

    '20 offers of marriage, does that annoy you Steve?'

  • @chrisyates8272
    @chrisyates8272 4 года назад +98

    "This monkeys not gonna drive away in that car or we are never doing this again "

  • @jordannicholson7751
    @jordannicholson7751 5 лет назад +70

    "Photographer... "
    *Ricky bursts out laughing*

    • @mamudi91
      @mamudi91 3 года назад +6

      The timing on that is so good

  • @antonysimpson6288
    @antonysimpson6288 Год назад +81

    The story of the monkey called 86 that stole a car and drove to Spain had me literally crying with laughter, especially when Karl's explanation of how he drove the car was "it was an automatic".

    • @sethiddings7293
      @sethiddings7293 Год назад +1

      Holy shit that's funny as fuck XD Love how They always try to prove His story wrong with logic like He didn't just make it up.

    • @cango5679
      @cango5679 Год назад

      He was called 86, but his real name was Boris.

    • @TheWoody3mental
      @TheWoody3mental Год назад +1

      He had a word with the monkey...

    • @Eradicus
      @Eradicus Год назад

      I'll never forget that line. Think it's my favourite of all the radio content

  • @PaddyRoon7
    @PaddyRoon7 Год назад +20

    Karl's three foolproof answers when faced with irrefutable evidence that he's talking bollocks:
    "It was ages ago"
    "The story's nearly finished"
    "Weird init?"

  • @djstl100
    @djstl100 5 месяцев назад +3

    "Aaaa, forget it then " when Carl gets fed up with Ricky's mouth kills me 😂😂

  • @craigwarner6156
    @craigwarner6156 7 лет назад +1012

    I love that Karl thinks animal rights are you have to let them do everything humans do including entering bike races and opening businesses

    • @ollybirkbeck8888
      @ollybirkbeck8888 5 лет назад +69

      And smoke fags and pinch your girls arse. That's at the top of animals rights.

    • @obtuse186
      @obtuse186 5 лет назад +49

      @@ollybirkbeck8888 I still remember when the RSPCA came knocking cos I only gave my beagle menthols

    • @Quantum_GirlE
      @Quantum_GirlE 5 лет назад +14

      O B T U S E Me too! I kept telling mine that menthols were even more unhealthy! He slowly pulled off his monocle, look at me.. and growled lololol

    • @toasted2807
      @toasted2807 4 года назад +20

      little airy fella

    • @mikisaba9336
      @mikisaba9336 4 года назад +1

      I don’t

  • @walkerliam94
    @walkerliam94 6 лет назад +60

    Honestly my favourite video on the internet ever, watched this about 9 times now.

  • @WolfColaUK
    @WolfColaUK 5 лет назад +60

    Karl finally laughing for the first time after well over an hour's worth of recordings telling monkey related stories is a beautiful thing.

    • @yaknoff379
      @yaknoff379 4 года назад +13

      Karl is a deadpan genius....

  • @simonb9412
    @simonb9412 10 месяцев назад +8

    “It’s actually run by a couple of chimps” 🤣

  • @colintwomey7554
    @colintwomey7554 4 года назад +70

    Best ones are the ones Karl can't even finish..
    "Something's said"
    *Ricky and Steve burst out laughing
    "Oh forget it"

    • @Mark-sc2dy
      @Mark-sc2dy 3 года назад +5

      Or the one about the band in Pittsburgh, the A and R guy likes the bass, "that's odd, we dont have a bassist"

    • @colintwomey7554
      @colintwomey7554 3 года назад +4

      @@Mark-sc2dy "they said let's.. let's do some business with the bananas"
      "THIS IS SUCH SHIT"
      "Forget it"

  • @mattleonard9867
    @mattleonard9867 6 лет назад +785

    Eyes that pop out of their head...Steve.

  • @frankytravels
    @frankytravels 5 лет назад +67

    57:32 “it’s actually run by a couple of chimps” ricky and Steve die laughing

  • @slikrick5857
    @slikrick5857 5 лет назад +27

    I come back and listen to these every few months and it’s always absolutely hilarious.

    • @chrisholloway4804
      @chrisholloway4804 2 года назад +1

      Same, I try and leave it longer but can't.. just knocking about aren't they!

  • @goldfang5191
    @goldfang5191 7 лет назад +171

    i love how ricky cannot comprehend it and loses his marbles

    • @bfkc111
      @bfkc111 6 лет назад +1

      It's an understanding of absurdity, fool. It takes more understanding than just the thing itself... which is super-simple (= usually unbelievably dumb).

    • @nxgan1088
      @nxgan1088 5 лет назад +16

      @@bfkc111 I found the arrogant smartarse!!! (and it only took five minutes)

    • @CousinBowling
      @CousinBowling 4 года назад +3

      @@bfkc111 ew

    • @moorsidefc
      @moorsidefc 3 года назад +2

      @@bfkc111 tit

  • @thevirus7368
    @thevirus7368 3 года назад +56

    Steve Merchant is actually the one who keeps this together and running.

    • @alansouthall8221
      @alansouthall8221 3 года назад +12

      So underated in these

    • @YanoshRagauld
      @YanoshRagauld 2 года назад

      Truth.

    • @dangerdan2592
      @dangerdan2592 2 года назад

      They all play off each other well.

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 10 месяцев назад +1

      Yes definitely, without Steve, Ricky would have just gone mental at Karl for being so stupid and the feature would have been binned

  • @nickbeane7203
    @nickbeane7203 6 лет назад +52

    16:12 the way Ricky says “oh Karl....KARL” gets me every time

  • @S-T-E-V-E
    @S-T-E-V-E Год назад +22

    The basis to 9/10 of these story's relies on Karl's belief that Monkey's can easily pass for Humans! 😂

    • @dpm2515
      @dpm2515 2 месяца назад

      Imo basis is about karl not being able to determine credible news/info sources from fiction and fantasy

  • @ayewhaddupdoe
    @ayewhaddupdoe 3 года назад +63

    I've always thought I just "didn't get" Brit humor. As an American I'm conditioned to think you need to couple your jokes with physical comedy.
    Then I discovered these three men. Last night I tried to listen to the pod while falling asleep and I was in bed laughing until 4:30am.
    England, protect these three men at all costs.

    • @gman2253
      @gman2253 3 года назад +3

      I recommend the show brass eye its well underrated

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 3 года назад +11

      Always nice to encounter Americans who are exploring British comedy, glad you like it!

    • @i_used_adblock_to_watch_this
      @i_used_adblock_to_watch_this 3 года назад +5

      @@AA-hg5fk I'm always under the assumption that most fans of the xfm shows are Americans, now.

    • @morfarson8592
      @morfarson8592 3 года назад +6

      I'm from Norway :D listening since 06 I'm probably a minority...

    • @JUANO510
      @JUANO510 2 года назад +6

      Yea I'm from Brooklyn NY and discovered karl from the cartoon on HBO and looked online and found all these clips, I couldn't believe it how funny it was

  • @FirstNameLastName-nf3qz
    @FirstNameLastName-nf3qz 3 года назад +34

    i love how stephen tells ricky to shut up every 5 seconds XDDD

  • @SR009s
    @SR009s 4 года назад +49

    “And he got the keys to the city”
    This part absolutely killed me

  • @timmygun795
    @timmygun795 6 лет назад +45

    2:30:05
    I loved that. That's one of the best interviews.
    - Cher

  • @brograb898
    @brograb898 8 месяцев назад +5

    “He drove to Spain!?”
    “It was an automatic.”

  • @VivalaryMan
    @VivalaryMan 2 года назад +7

    It doesn't get any better than Yak when it comes to KP.
    No ads, quality content, gets my respect EVERYTIME.

  • @Lamedvavnik
    @Lamedvavnik 4 года назад +376

    The funny thing about Karl’s monkey news is that a lot of them are true but he usually mixes the story up and makes up the details as he goes along.

    • @nathanpapp432
      @nathanpapp432 3 года назад +86

      He reads the headline, looks at the pictures then makes up the rest.

    • @robertsmith9076
      @robertsmith9076 3 года назад +5

      I hate to say it but Karl isn't right in the head .

    • @nix2939
      @nix2939 3 года назад +50

      "...something's said"

    • @Ead32180
      @Ead32180 3 года назад +2

      @Mattress Store the news today IS twaddle:)

    • @ulrichenevoldsen8371
      @ulrichenevoldsen8371 3 года назад +3

      @@robertsmith9076 he is just a little slow. And yet more successful than most people

  • @pixiwl
    @pixiwl 8 лет назад +350

    "Something's said"

    • @higgins7z767
      @higgins7z767 7 лет назад +38

      Brian Kelly that's Kim Kardashian and Brittany spears. good luck with that threesome

    • @Shmiguelly
      @Shmiguelly 7 лет назад +8

      I read this and was like that doesn't sound very funny. I was so wrong.

    • @jerres9585
      @jerres9585 6 лет назад

      I didn't get it what did he mean when he said that. It made zero sense to me or is that why it was funny?

    • @hollywoodknights9343
      @hollywoodknights9343 6 лет назад

      pixiwl Love this bit now cant find it!

    • @Crunch_Buttsteak
      @Crunch_Buttsteak 5 лет назад +3

      @@jerres9585 It's just Karl's overall ineptitude in his research & his conjecture. He fills in the blanks in his gullible head & he's happy with it. Then he thinks Ricky & Steve are just gonna go with it.

  • @tbirdtadhg
    @tbirdtadhg 7 лет назад +476

    Nearly 200 minutes of absolute twaddle

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 7 лет назад +48

      tbirdtadhg glorious, hilarious twaddle.

    • @robertsmith3672
      @robertsmith3672 3 года назад +1

      I tired of Karl ages ago better to let Steve and Rick chat. The rot set in with " right ". right. ".right ...

    • @aredub1847
      @aredub1847 3 года назад +6

      its very brit twaddle too.

    • @larryzigler6812
      @larryzigler6812 3 года назад +9

      @@robertsmith3672 Opposite is true for me.

    • @robertsmith3672
      @robertsmith3672 3 года назад +4

      @@larryzigler6812 What ,,? Left left left

  • @themightysomeone9604
    @themightysomeone9604 4 года назад +45

    21:39 ricky's reaction is everything i needed

  • @Stoate
    @Stoate 4 года назад +10

    "someone kept winnin em" is one of the funniest things i've ever heard

  • @OfficialFinlayJones
    @OfficialFinlayJones 7 лет назад +179

    “Eyes that pop out there ed............... Steve” - I AM DEAD!!!

  • @Ismail-Yahya
    @Ismail-Yahya 2 года назад +14

    I wish they still did these, KP is a comedy legend

  • @spinny003
    @spinny003 3 года назад +18

    I laughed at the first line. Karl saying he's done a bit of research is like a blind kid describing the colour orange.

  • @sandwichbreath0
    @sandwichbreath0 5 лет назад +297

    He speaks, highly educated... photographer

    • @williamsmith666
      @williamsmith666 4 года назад +15

      Oh, Karl...KARL!

    • @kitpalmer1583
      @kitpalmer1583 4 года назад +8

      best bit is it's true, only bit he got wrong was Koko was a female :')

    • @BobbyTMF
      @BobbyTMF 4 года назад +5

      Kit Palmer play a record

    • @mjdalicandro
      @mjdalicandro 3 года назад +8

      It's at 15:40 for those looking for it.

    • @rrw65
      @rrw65 3 года назад +1

      Koko actually took photos with 35 mm camera, She loved kittens, used sign language to communicate with caretakers, and loved to watch tv. Koko actually answered , in sign language, questions from forums online. Actually met Robin Williams, and when told he had died, cried. R.I.P. Koko.

  • @AgentSmith911
    @AgentSmith911 5 месяцев назад +15

    Years later, I'd give £100 to see video recording of the studio when these guys talked about these monkey news

    • @johnraber2486
      @johnraber2486 2 месяца назад

      Some videos are online

    • @AbcDef-zf4gs
      @AbcDef-zf4gs 19 дней назад

      Imagine if the went on a 6 stop tour... like rn. Karl loads up and it's exactly like the podcasts

  • @sarahkavanagh7355
    @sarahkavanagh7355 3 года назад +37

    1:27.30 Karl: "instead of saying 'do you want to meet in a restaurant or a bar', they'd say 'what tree do you want to meet at?' "
    Ricky: "You're nearly....you're ill"
    💀😂😂😂

    • @josephwheatley5488
      @josephwheatley5488 2 года назад +1

      This exchange is forever my favourite xfm moment. Ricky sounds so aggrieved 😂

  • @ilikemilkshake22
    @ilikemilkshake22 7 месяцев назад +1

    Merchant's "Ooh hello" or "Ahh yeah?" or "Oioi" every time Karl introduces "There's this monkey right" gets me every single time

  • @ellankih
    @ellankih 7 лет назад +137

    43:13...One of the best. I always die laughing when I listen, eyes popout....Steve....

    • @abbyp1360
      @abbyp1360 7 лет назад +15

      Batman Fanatic
      "What's 1.6...?"
      "Drop your trousers!"
      AHAHA XD

    • @jonkas8521
      @jonkas8521 6 лет назад +4

      Have you got a ruler?

    • @josephchapman9575
      @josephchapman9575 5 лет назад +1

      Thank you

    • @cydoniemiles1535
      @cydoniemiles1535 4 года назад +3

      Well, I don’t think it ‘as... 😂😂

  • @wondermike007
    @wondermike007 5 лет назад +99

    Don't. Talk. Shite. Twice.

  • @thepontiacbandit7874
    @thepontiacbandit7874 3 года назад +10

    ‘There was this…’ ‘Monkey?’
    I love Steve’s tone of voice. 😂

  • @manmoth1184
    @manmoth1184 3 года назад +8

    "Then this tricycle..."
    These videos make me so happy

  • @TG-zf5zp
    @TG-zf5zp 3 года назад +46

    I love hearing Karl finally crack up and laughing his head off at 1:18:52 onwards. Brilliant stuff, Hilarious! Well done Yak for editing all these compilations together. Cheers.

    • @raniketki4795
      @raniketki4795 2 года назад +1

      100 monkey phenomenon is actually true; source needed; really love this compilation listening for the umpteenth time ,still funny 😂

  • @thesensur6214
    @thesensur6214 4 года назад +15

    The “Chimp doctors” thing is literally the best thing Iv’e ever heard.

  • @TheBadMoJoe
    @TheBadMoJoe Год назад +9

    1:18:45 I’ve never heard Karl laugh so hard. He couldn’t even speak. Such a rare treat!

  • @waynesWyrdWorld
    @waynesWyrdWorld 3 года назад +56

    I wish Karl would make a paranormal investigation series.

    • @morfarson8592
      @morfarson8592 3 года назад +18

      He did explore that scary inn his mate worked at, where he found that pile of flies with a condom stuck on top.

    • @paulcunnane4
      @paulcunnane4 2 года назад

      Brilliant idea!

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 2 года назад +3

      There's no explanation... Weird init?

    • @jimmyrustler8983
      @jimmyrustler8983 Год назад

      @@morfarson8592 One of my favourite bits 🤣

    • @jaycuthbert245
      @jaycuthbert245 Год назад

      It was pushing people off their bikes..lmao one of his best bits that was lol

  • @RySLz
    @RySLz 3 месяца назад +3

    ‘Because now the owner of the chimp, wants to enter it into the Tour De France’ even after all the wild shit he comes up with before it’s this that kills me. Genius.

  • @matthewhendy5785
    @matthewhendy5785 4 года назад +18

    I have listened to this more times than I can remember. I never get bored. Cracks me up every time.

  • @Simon-fr4ts
    @Simon-fr4ts 2 года назад +17

    1:53:08 was gold. Steve proper laughed out loud, not his usual chuckle.

    • @JD-pi2ce
      @JD-pi2ce Год назад +3

      Somethings said.

  • @lewisl1394
    @lewisl1394 6 лет назад +58

    “Somebody kept on winning em”

  • @natedogeee2904
    @natedogeee2904 4 года назад +13

    It's 2019 and we all still listen to xfm to help us sleep 😊, I wish these 3 would return for one finale podcast.

    • @Dooshwa
      @Dooshwa 3 года назад

      2021 and im still listening to this to goto sleep to

    • @Dancatspoolschool
      @Dancatspoolschool 2 года назад

      2022!! Fall asleep and wake up to…

  • @samlasley798
    @samlasley798 Год назад +14

    I genuinely think Monkey News became revenge on Ricky and Steve for all their teasing of Karl and times he got his head squoze. He damn well knew how much he wound up Ricky with the feature and used it to his advantage; kudos to Karl

  • @CorporalFriendlyShark
    @CorporalFriendlyShark 4 года назад +46

    52:10 will never not have me rolling on my back like a dying fly from laughing so much

    • @MrNcarey88
      @MrNcarey88 2 года назад +5

      Had to thump it in the head

    • @TheUnknownDozo
      @TheUnknownDozo 10 месяцев назад

      Imposible no cagarse de la risa en esa parte jajsj

  • @manager6711
    @manager6711 3 года назад +27

    I love when Ricky laughs 😂 especially the "I'm gonna die" line 😂

    • @dangerdan2592
      @dangerdan2592 2 года назад +2

      I know, people complain about him but I think it makes it funnier when he gets annoyed (most of the time) lol.

  • @thewarriorsway544
    @thewarriorsway544 5 лет назад +15

    Every night for the last 8 years I listen to this guy crazy
    Anyone else?

  • @HighLordBlazeReborn
    @HighLordBlazeReborn Год назад +4

    The best stories are the ones where, half a minute into Karl's twaddle, you can hear ricky just stand up and leave, going "no thats it, thats it, im done"

  • @Hoplasa
    @Hoplasa 4 года назад +7

    "That's a bit odd though" ; "Turns out *INPUT INSANE RAMBLE HERE*"

  • @jordanjames9242
    @jordanjames9242 3 года назад +23

    1:53:00 “something’s said”. Funniest moment ever 😅😅

    • @raptorlewis
      @raptorlewis Месяц назад

      THANK YOU i came looking for this

  • @BLK_MN
    @BLK_MN Год назад +2

    This is utter hysteria. I’m so blown away by Karl and his naivety, but the way Ricky *explodes* with anger and laughter can only lead me to the conclusion that these are genuine “stories” and Karl believes almost all of them and had to share the news.

  • @AllyGatorAnimator
    @AllyGatorAnimator 3 года назад +15

    "What programme is this?"
    "It's a chat show."
    "Wh...whose chat show is it?!"
    "Well it's...it's the monkey's now."
    Brilliant. Bonus points for Karl hearing Steve suggest Cher was the special guest as a joke, before incorporating her into the story as if it were fact. Definitely one of my favourites.

  • @DJ_Cub
    @DJ_Cub 3 года назад +4

    44:42 what’s 1.6 CM? “Pop off your trousers” that has to be the most underrated line/comeback in this entire compilation. Brilliant

  • @Rmh-z4u
    @Rmh-z4u 10 месяцев назад +3

    This is always a trust worthy podcast to put on if you ever wake up and can't hear Ricky, Steve and Karl.

  • @chrisevans1310
    @chrisevans1310 4 года назад +8

    Not long got into these podcasts and can’t get enough of Karl genius 😂😂👍

  • @HighLordBlazeReborn
    @HighLordBlazeReborn 2 года назад +5

    Ricky's "DONT TALK SHIT!!!" makes me crack the fuck up every time 😂

  • @lornabrand3477
    @lornabrand3477 Год назад +2

    Absolutely love the way Karl describes his stories and the way Steve tries to mediate the two of them funny

  • @omegafd6992
    @omegafd6992 Год назад +6

    everyone here saying ricky ruins these i think hes reaction makes these alot of the time. the bit in the kirtsy morris one where ricky says "NO HES GONE TOO FAR THIS TIME" makes me belly laugh everytime. all three make this show together.

    • @ItsSVO
      @ItsSVO 11 месяцев назад +1

      But Ricky made trans jokes so now he’s suddenly not funny, never has been and all his solo work is shite because merchant and Karl were the masterminds.
      You’re completely right, that Ricky playing up to these sections with his reactions really is funnier than the news itself. It’s the genius of the 3, without any of them it wouldn’t be even half as funny.

    • @ambrosiadreamer
      @ambrosiadreamer 8 месяцев назад

      @@ItsSVOricky has done much more awful shit than only being transphobic LMAO

  • @AlanAttack
    @AlanAttack 5 лет назад +17

    Easliy the funniest thing in comedy history....I was listening to this and started crying...then screaming !!.....then the POLICE CAME TO MY HOUSE!!!!.....Policeman came out....was a little monkey fella....

  • @Colonelgliz
    @Colonelgliz 2 года назад +5

    My favorite bit is the one soccer player with a PhD in PHYSICS HAHAHAHAHAHA

  • @andrewhadden133
    @andrewhadden133 Год назад +2

    KP: 'I don't know how recent this was..'
    RG: 'oh God'
    😂

  • @rorybrooks685
    @rorybrooks685 5 лет назад +5

    "20offers of marriage.........,....does that annoy you Steve" actually did lol when that bit popped up

  • @GremlinLicker
    @GremlinLicker 3 месяца назад +1

    😂 thanks for editing/adding the conclusion to the monkey robbery... 😅

  • @heleng6968
    @heleng6968 3 года назад +18

    I love Steve's quiet laugh in the background 😂😂😂

  • @FutureAbe
    @FutureAbe 5 месяцев назад +1

    I love how Karl prefaces so many stories with “Normal fella, nothing wrong with him” or “lovely day, nice weather an’ that”

  • @ianinkster2261
    @ianinkster2261 3 года назад +7

    8:15 "This isn't the Washington Post you're reading", as though the Washington Post doesn't publish twaddle.

  • @Etop05
    @Etop05 8 месяцев назад +1

    1:55:08 The ”Cardgame”-story is easly one of my favourites mainly because of Stephens question at the end 😂💀

  • @wfreak1000
    @wfreak1000 3 года назад +8

    I always lose it at "alright Kirsty?" lol

  • @Leodragon76
    @Leodragon76 Год назад +2

    Greatest ever! " Record for the eyes popping out of their head"......pause pause pause......."Steve"😅

  • @danielreeve1433
    @danielreeve1433 3 года назад +12

    45:10 you can TELL that pissed Steve off so badly 😂