Google Reviews does Schools 💀

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  • Опубликовано: 20 дек 2024

Комментарии • 3,1 тыс.

  • @D415Y-x0
    @D415Y-x0 2 года назад +7879

    Matt, please do a whole video on different tweets from UwU girls just all in the Jason Statham voice, that would be wicked

    • @Matt_Rose
      @Matt_Rose  2 года назад +1879

      Pinning this to see if this is an idea which also captures others' interest. Doing Statham kills my throat, so to speak, but I can certainly see how a full video might be intriguing.

    • @Shredzy715
      @Shredzy715 2 года назад +95

      yeah guess it would be funny

    • @Shrek_Has_Covid19
      @Shrek_Has_Covid19 2 года назад +65

      🥵

    • @IamaPERSON
      @IamaPERSON 2 года назад +102

      Idk who Jason Statham is, but sure.

    • @The_Sleepiest_Socialist
      @The_Sleepiest_Socialist 2 года назад +24

      @@Matt_Rose dew it!

  • @monoxxides
    @monoxxides 2 года назад +2484

    one of the reviews on my school is literally "somehow i smell like cheeseeeeee?" and another is "the guac here tastes like algae... oh wait." i think pissed-off students write the best reviews.

    • @AustinTheWeenieTickler
      @AustinTheWeenieTickler 2 года назад +47

      LMFAOOO 💀

    • @carrotzone27
      @carrotzone27 2 года назад

      one review wants my school demolished

    • @jonathanielpringlemaniii
      @jonathanielpringlemaniii 2 года назад +67

      one of my school's reviews:
      (1 star)
      "euqenz poopoo hed"

    • @Snow_Skitter
      @Snow_Skitter 2 года назад +34

      They’re the “I smell like beef” kid grown up.

    • @mystic_topaz6783
      @mystic_topaz6783 2 года назад +17

      They do. They know everything about the school,so they always know enough to absolutely cremate it.

  • @tsrkfn
    @tsrkfn 2 года назад +9481

    My school had a bunch of kids angry at them in the reviews during quarantine, so much so they had to make an announcement school for them to stop spreading misinformation about the school

    • @AustinTheWeenieTickler
      @AustinTheWeenieTickler 2 года назад +629

      LMFAOOO same thing happened on the google reviews for my school… someone got norovirus from a chicken and the entire school lost it 😭
      Edit: oops i started an argument lol

    • @noyoucantnoicantnowecantsostop
      @noyoucantnoicantnowecantsostop 2 года назад +272

      Must be from the crazy batshit load of HWs with inhumanely small span of deadline. Been there done that and glad it happened when i was a semester away from graduation

    • @familyk9443
      @familyk9443 2 года назад +25

      @@AustinTheWeenieTickler norovirus.

    • @tediumluvs
      @tediumluvs 2 года назад +165

      @@familyk9443 yea? It’s like food poisoning…

    • @familyk9443
      @familyk9443 2 года назад +123

      @@tediumluvs LOL i thought it was a misspelling from corona virus

  • @iClone101
    @iClone101 2 года назад +962

    At one point, my high school's robotics team somehow convinced Google that they were located in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. Our school was still in its usual place, just the robotics team that became a landless island.

    • @flowerducky276
      @flowerducky276 Год назад +23

      😭

    • @sallyjune4109
      @sallyjune4109 Год назад +23

      That is epic!

    • @i_never_had_a_burger
      @i_never_had_a_burger Год назад +37

      You have a robotics team in high school? sounds so cool!!
      I would've loved to be part of one when I was in high school.

    • @Post_Stall_Maneuver
      @Post_Stall_Maneuver Год назад +53

      as an ocean, can confirm your robotics team was creating their robots on a sailboat several thousand miles from land

    • @error_tryagain_4049
      @error_tryagain_4049 Год назад +32

      @@Post_Stall_Maneuver As a nearby H2O molecule, I can also confirm

  • @roygribbleston619
    @roygribbleston619 2 года назад +2567

    Funny thing is I looked up my old school's reviews just earlier today. The top review? A local guide's statement that "the building looks depressing... but the kindergarden nearby seems like a glimmer of hope".

    • @g3design637
      @g3design637 2 года назад +338

      I swear, schools are *built* to be stressful and depressing.

    • @ProfessionalBugLover
      @ProfessionalBugLover 2 года назад +22

      @@g3design637 lmao

    • @Pommmmm
      @Pommmmm 2 года назад +178

      @@g3design637
      Some schools are literally remodeled from prisons.

    • @SkyHighSkylar
      @SkyHighSkylar 2 года назад +27

      @@Pommmmm *cough* new Pokémon game *cough*

    • @krystal1722
      @krystal1722 2 года назад +60

      Haha, relateable: my jr high looked like an asylum, then they built two elementary schools that were colorful (one was purple!) and it just made it that much more depressing.

  • @jimmydesouza4375
    @jimmydesouza4375 2 года назад +4102

    The high school I went to recently banned a girl from the senior prom because she had been absent too much. The reason why she was absent? She was dying from brain cancer (that she miraculously recovered from in the end).
    Most of the reviews are people angry about that.

  • @ItsCaduceus
    @ItsCaduceus 2 года назад +447

    My school had a Wikipedia page that got edited and stayed edited for a long time. It stated that the teachers locked students in cages in the basement, among many other things. It was great.

    • @Gracewillwood2837
      @Gracewillwood2837 Год назад +34

      Teachers.... WHAT-

    • @SoThisIsMyCat
      @SoThisIsMyCat Год назад +23

      *** amongst many other things ***

    • @TheOddLia
      @TheOddLia 8 месяцев назад +15

      My school got its IP blocked from Wikipedia for vandalism. According to its user contributions, someone was drafting an article about the school but they never published it so it was deleted. I really want to know what it said…

    • @stuffenjoyer6677
      @stuffenjoyer6677 5 месяцев назад

      Bruh

    • @Idkpleasejustletmechangeit
      @Idkpleasejustletmechangeit 2 месяца назад

      ​@@TheOddLiaI unironically got my old school multiple temporary bans from German Wikipedia for making up a fake town in Germany called "Scheißhausen" and creating fake history around it. Also replaced Trump with Shrek.

  • @airbagfryer
    @airbagfryer 2 года назад +7734

    I remember someone reviewed my middle school and called it “hell.” It was five stars.

    • @Apileofcheese
      @Apileofcheese 2 года назад

      @Tinder in real life 🅥 Get out of here Biatch

    • @malli122
      @malli122 2 года назад

      @Tinder in real life 🅥 full vid of what? Your balls dropping?

    • @Insanebehaviordude
      @Insanebehaviordude 2 года назад +832

      Must've been from a demon, they probably felt at home. 5 stars.

    • @Spongyboi897
      @Spongyboi897 2 года назад +533

      @@Insanebehaviordude Or from a teacher who loves to see students suffer.

    • @ChromaDistortion
      @ChromaDistortion 2 года назад +121

      now i wonder how many sadists exists

  • @zachgreenninja3885
    @zachgreenninja3885 2 года назад +6164

    This video really shows how schools can give people lots of stories to tell.

    • @carrotzone27
      @carrotzone27 2 года назад +58

      my old school it was a hood kids were stealing money of each other and all these weird azz deals were going on

    • @zachgreenninja3885
      @zachgreenninja3885 2 года назад +18

      @@carrotzone27 it’s a bot/spam comment

    • @carrotzone27
      @carrotzone27 2 года назад +26

      @@zachgreenninja3885 bozos trying to spread his content but it's not even interesting

    • @zachgreenninja3885
      @zachgreenninja3885 2 года назад +12

      @@carrotzone27 I know. It’s not at all interesting

    • @riverstyx7251
      @riverstyx7251 2 года назад

      My school was full of anarchy and authoritarianism at the same time. If that doesn’t make sense, exactly.
      If that still doesn’t make sense, imagine that an average day at your school is walking in to hear the news that someone drew a 12 foot long and 5ft wide dick on the courtyard, which also happened to be a major connecting hallway in the school. So the faculty announces that area is closed for the next few days, no they won’t be allowing students extra time to get to class even though they just doubled our commute time between classes over a dick pic, and they will be holding the entire freshman class responsible for this misdeed until they find out who did it. Which of course causes even more rebellion because they just angered _the_ most hormonal class in school.
      High school made me more tired than college ever did.

  • @lillithb1661
    @lillithb1661 2 года назад +190

    At my high school a toilet seat went missing from one of the bathrooms. The teachers blamed us for it and lectured us several times.
    During assembly the prefects made a parody video of those anti-piracy ads beginning with ‘you wouldn’t steal a toilet seat’
    It turned out to be the custodians

    • @Blue-Maned_Hawk
      @Blue-Maned_Hawk 7 месяцев назад +4

      The custodians were a toilet seat?

    • @germanelkapo1
      @germanelkapo1 6 месяцев назад

      @@Blue-Maned_Hawk custodians is slang for seat kleptomaniacs

    • @stuffenjoyer6677
      @stuffenjoyer6677 5 месяцев назад +2

      This is why TikTok trends need to be removed from our society.

  • @raptalos9412
    @raptalos9412 2 года назад +676

    The poorly spelled reviews being about schools just kinda make sense

    • @IamaPERSON
      @IamaPERSON 2 года назад +21

      “And again, it just works.”

    • @IamaPERSON
      @IamaPERSON 2 года назад

      @𝙀𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙁𝙤𝙤𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙩 if you make worse content, keep your comments up.

    • @genericname2747
      @genericname2747 2 года назад +2

      @𝙀𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙁𝙤𝙤𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙩 peepee poopoo

    • @Todija
      @Todija 2 года назад +1

      @𝙀𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙁𝙤𝙤𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙩 I reported at least 3 of your comments by now

  • @mindlesssimulation
    @mindlesssimulation 2 года назад +3374

    My favourite review for my school is "Really good at dealing with gender differences, as a Aquamanian I have certain conditions that must be met and this school caters for me perfectly. Me and fellow pupils - all except Jeff - made me feel at home. We all had devious hands, and explored the schools dark and moist areas. My only gripe, is I went swimming for five minutes then I realised there wasn't any water, I was swimming in baked beans and chlorine. The 3Pi/10 recommend"

  • @moupipics
    @moupipics 2 года назад +223

    Guys I am Chinese, and 3:13 is the typical result of banging whatever bodyparts on your keyboard

    • @f1rstaidmusic667
      @f1rstaidmusic667 8 месяцев назад +19

      canadian here. it was hands i believe

    • @сумраккк
      @сумраккк 3 месяца назад +9

      scottish person here. i eat doorframes.

    • @moupipics
      @moupipics 3 месяца назад +5

      @@сумраккк sounds delicious

    • @сумраккк
      @сумраккк 3 месяца назад +4

      @@moupipics yes

  • @justaperson4656
    @justaperson4656 2 года назад +3172

    "DO NOT SEND YOUR KIDS HERE PEOPLE! all the kids are little scumbags. They bullied cousin and made her leave. The rats from the toilet chased and bit her and called her names. When she told the teachers they said 'don't be silly' the teachers are useless DO NOT STEP FOOT IN THIS PLACE MATE" - 1 star review, rats here is used as an insult for the kids that bit their cousin
    "Banterous school although there are alot of paper shreks and they fell into my bag and my parents were not happy because I was framed as the shrek man absolutely terrifying"
    - 2 stars, can confirm the shrek man was a running joke
    "Rats juumping out the toilets head teacher runs around smashing up tables and miss page nocked down the art block last week"
    - 1 star, this one is literal, there were dead rats found in the vents of the girls toilets when it was torn down
    All legit reviews from the school I used to go to
    Edit: clearing up the rats discourse

    • @eneco3965
      @eneco3965 2 года назад +182

      The rats called her names?

    • @Djevepwvelsvwdbke
      @Djevepwvelsvwdbke 2 года назад +28

      Well are they real?

    • @chainsawguyyy
      @chainsawguyyy 2 года назад +92

      this is the funniest comment i saw here yet i choked on my water

    • @Svoroda
      @Svoroda 2 года назад +76

      The shrek man lol.

    • @justaperson4656
      @justaperson4656 2 года назад +121

      @@eneco3965 rats is a British insult, the lady was calling the kids who bit her cousin rats

  • @ratmcravioli
    @ratmcravioli 2 года назад +2321

    the best thing about the google reviews of my school was not the reviews but the fact that someone managed to get it classified as a prison. also, quite a few of the reviews used to be about how it's a concentration camp (they got deleted), and my friends and i edited the wikipedia page to make the school seem like some type of prison that worships our principal, and we eventually got the school ip banned from editing on wikipedia for awhile

    • @o.sunsfamily
      @o.sunsfamily 2 года назад +551

      Our son's school used to be an Italian restaurant on Google. They had quite a few interesting reviews with food pictures, complaints about the waiters smoking and greasy food,... If I had not been aware it was a school, I might have believed it were a restaurant run by the Italian mafia.

    • @comfortablyintherain
      @comfortablyintherain 2 года назад +67

      @@o.sunsfamily LMAOO

    • @rebeccahherdener2068
      @rebeccahherdener2068 2 года назад +21

      @@o.sunsfamily 😂🤣😂🤣

    • @rebeccahherdener2068
      @rebeccahherdener2068 2 года назад +13

      That is hilarious!🤣

    • @Oldundead9491
      @Oldundead9491 2 года назад +35

      That's the beginning of a revolution

  • @aetherealbeing690
    @aetherealbeing690 2 года назад +49

    A kid I knew in 7th grade once wrote a review on our middle school, which was genuinely a terrible school. He wrote, “This school sucks.” The internet security system at my school was so bad, that multiple kids had hacked the school website, but my favorite time was when another kid I knew convinced Google he was the owner of our middle school, and responded to the first kid’s review with, “We know where you live, Jacob.” (Fake name, of course). The memory of these events brings me so much joy.

  • @therealrexgreen
    @therealrexgreen 2 года назад +1625

    One of our rival schools is brand new and its colors are blue, yellow, and gray. The students left a TON of IKEA-themed reviews talking about Swedish meatballs and the lack of furniture. Sadly, the reviews all got taken down and now you can’t even leave a review on the school

    • @nohintshere
      @nohintshere 2 года назад +125

      that is absolutely legendary

    • @frenchempire9471
      @frenchempire9471 2 года назад +138

      Sue the place for censorship of opinions or something related, I don't know the charge

    • @AnsophOfficial
      @AnsophOfficial 2 года назад +54

      @@frenchempire9471 uhm law and justice for blocking misinformation!!!

    • @themyofmy
      @themyofmy 2 года назад +81

      @@AnsophOfficial misinformation implies they were lying

    • @ProfessionalBugLover
      @ProfessionalBugLover 2 года назад +8

      where is this school i wanna visit

  • @chiroptera626
    @chiroptera626 2 года назад +313

    We had a motivational speaker come to our school. He was trying to hype us all up. He said "Hey now let me hear ya! Isn't this the best middle school ever?!"
    Entire auditorium, 6-8 grade, in unison: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
    He had us redo it twice because we kept saying no.

    • @StromcloudStrawberry
      @StromcloudStrawberry Год назад +50

      The 6-8 graders should get a gold star

    • @stuffenjoyer6677
      @stuffenjoyer6677 5 месяцев назад +1

      I swear, kids are getting more aware than we think.

    • @SlicerJackie
      @SlicerJackie 2 месяца назад +1

      Same thing happened at a middle school I went to. Most of the teachers were disappointed in us, except for one who encouraged it.

  • @FishVirus
    @FishVirus 2 года назад +35

    There was literally a 1 star review for my school that simply stated:
    TOO MUCH GLASS

  • @tetra8157
    @tetra8157 2 года назад +358

    3:02 as a person who can read Chinese, I can’t really blame the translation because chances are, the person just acivated a Chinese keyboard and spammed the suggestions. It’s quite literally gibberish

    • @qwertyuiop.lkjhgfdsa
      @qwertyuiop.lkjhgfdsa 2 года назад +62

      so basically it's equivelant to "the same as the other one I have to do it for you to do it for me to get a new one for me and you are a bit of an argument with me to do a few things to me and I will be in the office" or whatever other nonsense autopredict can spit out

    • @kindauncool
      @kindauncool 2 года назад +7

      I figured

    • @worlds_worst_tf2_player
      @worlds_worst_tf2_player 2 года назад +1

      @@qwertyuiop.lkjhgfdsa today i went to the school and the and the and the because today i went to the school since the president Barack Obama had drove a Ford Fiesta in the street.

    • @AmbiambiSinistrous
      @AmbiambiSinistrous 2 года назад +24

      Yeah, I was surprised because Google usually translates Chinese pretty well (relative to other translation services ahem FACEBOOK), but when I looked closer at the original I was like "hunh, actually this checks out".

    • @wildman510
      @wildman510 2 года назад

      These are the best ones I have ever seen in the past few days and I have a few things to do with the whole thing is just a professional example of a qxir joke about it I think it was a black one of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of the entire encyclopedia of a snail 🐌🐌🐌🐌🐌🐌🐌🐌🐌🐌🐌🐌 I'm the one 🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕐🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕜🕐🕐🕐🕐🕐🕐🕐🕐🕐🕐🕐 y a lot more and I have a great time at home with you guys to see the family of you guys and have fun and have fun and be fun and have a good night to be there at all there the same time of day for me of the day the best time of year for a while I thought it would probably happen enough for you could get it for me of a snail and I love how it was branded in a nutshell of time to be there at the house to go with you to be a great day the other cars are you and you are the only person that I can get you in. So basically whatever this is

  • @truespiderlover
    @truespiderlover 2 года назад +771

    When I was becoming a freshman in highschool, I looked up my highschool and looked at their reviews and now, looking back, they deleted a review about a girl getting pushed down the stairs!

    • @pyrobeast_jack
      @pyrobeast_jack 2 года назад +77

      OH.

    • @kaneko89
      @kaneko89 2 года назад +73

      Shit.

    • @youssefbencheikh8637
      @youssefbencheikh8637 2 года назад +55

      That's brutal

    • @familyk9443
      @familyk9443 2 года назад +121

      Write it again and explain that the school deleted it in a new review.

    • @ch03rry440
      @ch03rry440 2 года назад +35

      the exclamation mark makes it sound like you’re delighted about thegirl getting pushed down the stairs 💀

  • @thechaosbringer858
    @thechaosbringer858 Год назад +52

    On my last day of HS the school made all the seniors fill out a thirty question survey. Questions like, did your teachers ever care if you wandered into class visibly upset? I filled mine out at the beginning of the day on the school issued IPAD. At lunch, I turned in said IPAD, and made my way to the gym to pick up my senior items (graduation tickets and such). I stood in like for THIRTY MINUTES. At one point, my CO from JROTC actually cut in front of me with his friends. When I finally got to the front, the teacher at the desk requested proof that I'd completed the survey. I told her that I'd done it on my IPAD. She then told me to get out of line, and fill out the survey again on my phone. Words can not describe the pure fury that went through my mind at that moment. I stepped out of line to fill it out, and of course the school wifi is too weak to open the website. And theres no cell service in the main building, because the whole place was like a giant faraday cage. So, I had to walk to the parking lot, before finally getting enough signal to open the survey. I didnt even answer any of the questions. I just wrote a single swear word on every single question and submitted it. Then I had to go back in and stand in line for another twenty minutes before finally receiving the tickets for my own graduation.

    • @stuffenjoyer6677
      @stuffenjoyer6677 5 месяцев назад +5

      I take it you were really happy to leave this school?

    • @thechaosbringer858
      @thechaosbringer858 5 месяцев назад +1

      @@stuffenjoyer6677 That's an understatement.

    • @stuffenjoyer6677
      @stuffenjoyer6677 5 месяцев назад +1

      @@thechaosbringer858 How bad was the school?

  • @panickednoodle
    @panickednoodle 2 года назад +495

    My school was pretty close to a burrito stand and you could easily go and get one during breaks and still be back on time. After the age of (I believe) 16, parents could sign a document declaring that their child could leave school premises if they so choose and that the school would not be responsible for them during that time. Basically you can’t sue the school of the kid gets hurt. Seems like a pretty good deal right?
    Well, the school (more accurately the new principal) didn’t like that.
    So one day our teacher comes in and announces super proudly that we are getting a fence around the entire school to ‘keep out the vandals‘. There were never any vandals. We all knew this was about the burritos, but that wasn’t why the entire school went on immediate strike and teachers had to hide from pissed students.
    See, every year we get a theoretical walk through of what to do in case of a shooting and seeing as our school just happens to be right next to a fairly thick patch of forest, most students are advised to run in there and hide until the police find us. Which would be pretty hard if there suddenly was a two meter fence in the way! And not only would we loose precious time scaling the damn thing and be sitting ducks for an active shooter, if they were easy enough for all of us to scale in such a scenario, it would do fuck all to keep out ‘vandals‘.
    This was over burritos.
    *TL;DR: principal would rather block off our escape route for school shootings, than letting us have burritos*
    Edit: This didn’t happen in the USA, not sure if that makes it better or worse

    • @wildman510
      @wildman510 2 года назад +28

      Yeah that sounds about right

    • @DannyDevitoOffical-TrustMeBro
      @DannyDevitoOffical-TrustMeBro 2 года назад +44

      I think our government should go back to attempting to run itself properly before it tries to teach and raise children again.

    • @francislee817
      @francislee817 2 года назад +55

      My school was near some take-out places and kids always went there during lunch as the food in school sucks (I once got food poisoning) and a year or two before I joined they added fences around so you couldn't. some kid in my year dug a whole under one and managed to sneak out during lunch though. Schools are literal prisons

    • @Jhud69
      @Jhud69 2 года назад +30

      Here in Poland it's a default that you can leave premises whenever you want and most people go to nearby restaurants during lunch break because sometimes schools don't even offer school lunches (and when they do nobody wants them, despite it being quite decent food).

    • @panickednoodle
      @panickednoodle 2 года назад +16

      @@francislee817 That indeed sounds like a literal prison. Props to that one kid tho!

  • @tylerray1368
    @tylerray1368 2 года назад +175

    I love how the kid who was forbidden food all day gave the school a 2 star review.
    "Hey, they didn't throw me in the alligator cage! Could be worse!"

  • @steIIaIaIa
    @steIIaIaIa 2 года назад +167

    the substitutes at our school are actually crazy.
    we have an elderly man sub who should frankly be in jail. he takes naps in class, plays candy crush on his ipad, has been rumored to call his wife once about a pizza, and the unsettling part- he’s been reported by many, MANY students to be seen watching p**n or childp**n on his ipad in class. he was fired, but then rehired because our school is so short staffed.
    once, the detention teacher was watching over my art class while our teacher was busy. she yelled at one kid because she thought he was facetiming another student, or sending selfies on snapchat. in reality he was using his phone camera as a mirror for our self portrait assignment. it should be noted he is a shy, nerdy fellow who isn’t allowed to have snapchat. the detention teacher is a clown.
    yet another time, we had a older woman subbing for our english class. she was on the phone with someone in class, and two kids in the front were whispering to each other. one was a girl, the other was her friend (a guy who happened to have longer hair.) the subtitute on the phone snapped “quiet girls!” to them. the guy- who is also my friend- was offended. when the sub got off the phone she knew he was offended, and said “i’m sorry girls, i shouldn’t have snapped.” the guy said “it’s fine… but i’m a boy.” our entire class erupted in laughter.

    • @sberky98
      @sberky98 2 года назад

      school sunglassesshsjhs

    • @Munchi3moo
      @Munchi3moo 10 месяцев назад +5

      The last one 😭
      My guy friend hangs out w me and my female friends and everyone just says “girls” when we get into any sort of trouble 😭 he’s offended but they don’t care 😭😭👏

    • @SuperanonymousUhhuh-pc1li
      @SuperanonymousUhhuh-pc1li 8 месяцев назад +7

      Is nobody’ going to talk about the CP in the first one wtaf 💀

    • @TheEverythingSpiral
      @TheEverythingSpiral 7 месяцев назад +5

      This sounds like a police lineup of suspects

    • @stuffenjoyer6677
      @stuffenjoyer6677 5 месяцев назад +1

      The teachers at that school are something else.

  • @riverthecrybaby9448
    @riverthecrybaby9448 2 года назад +565

    Inspired me to look at the reviews of my school. This is the first thing I saw.
    “My bus driver drove away without me, even though I ran up to the door and made eye contact. This happened in 2004, and I still to this day will not get a ride from anyone because of my intense fear of being stranded in a miserable place that I can't escape. It effected me so much that I was unable to finish out my highschool diploma.
    I no longer wait for busses, because they didn't wait for me. Now I weave cautiously between children and ignore the flashing stop sign, because I was ignored too. That miserable bus driver lady ruined my trust in the educational system. I can still see her cold stare from those evil, dead, eyes. I won't send my kids to this school and I won't even drive near it because of that bus driver in 2004.”

  • @Redblock
    @Redblock 2 года назад +736

    One time in Year 8, my friends claimed ownership of our school on Google Maps and proceeded to change the school to a *[Insert American hobby here]* shop, and uploaded random photos of teachers onto the place. They even went as far to reply to a review saying: *We agree the food here is poor - our tuna comes from Australia, that's why it's rank* (Though we're from London).
    Another school that I went to for a trip had a review simply called: *Big Chungus comes here* .
    Needless to say, this was the funniest things I've ever seen, and caused a trend to mass-review every school in the area. The school reported the incident to Google, though they did nothing about it

    • @familyk9443
      @familyk9443 2 года назад +47

      Honestly hilarious and absolutely genius.

    • @christinejorgens6577
      @christinejorgens6577 2 года назад +41

      This is one time that Google doesn’t care about it at all!

    • @toomanyinterests
      @toomanyinterests 2 года назад +21

      My school was described as a meme school on the Google knowledge panel for a while.

    • @RedUzi29
      @RedUzi29 2 года назад +25

      "What school did you go to?" "i went to [American hobby] shop"

    • @TraveledBolt
      @TraveledBolt 2 года назад +1

      lmao

  • @popculturemike3054
    @popculturemike3054 2 года назад +114

    I one time left a (partially) joking review for my high school. It went as follows:
    “This school taught me a lot. Like, for example, the fact that you can charge thousands of dollars per student, commit millions of dollars of tax fraud every year, never spend money on important fixes, and somehow still end up $6 million in debt.”

  • @stargazer31
    @stargazer31 2 года назад +320

    I once heard that in the first lockdown in 2020, some Chinese students had to do work through an app, so they spammed it with 1-star reviews until it got taken off the app store

    • @Weeaboogod_
      @Weeaboogod_ 2 года назад +36

      That did indeed happen

    • @elora512
      @elora512 2 года назад +45

      Stellar teamwork

    • @fatasscatcandy
      @fatasscatcandy 2 года назад +29

      Same where I'm from, most of us used Google Classroom. Judging by the grammar most reviews were from middle/elementary school kids and they are hilarious 😂

    • @seanhartnett79
      @seanhartnett79 2 года назад +2

      Lol

    • @thighmeat6034
      @thighmeat6034 2 года назад

      @@fatasscatcandy damn which brings the question, maybe matt could read some app store (especially gov/school apps) reviews

  • @rosilinathedragon4382
    @rosilinathedragon4382 2 года назад +157

    school google reviews are always a fucking joyride between shitposts, hate, and love lmao

  • @Perfect.unsymmetry
    @Perfect.unsymmetry 11 месяцев назад +19

    Fun fact, when I was in school I too brought a toaster to school. I made toast during history, watching the toast cook was more interesting tbh

  • @santaclaus9983
    @santaclaus9983 2 года назад +109

    Some guy at the junior high I went to changed his name on Google to “Jew Boy” and proceeded to leave a review saying “this school is worse than the Holocaust”. The review got voted to be helpful by thirty people

  • @felixhatton7334
    @felixhatton7334 2 года назад +172

    Someone at my old school told everyone that if everyone rated the school as one star it would be shut down. About quarter of the school tried it and all that we got was an angry assembly about it

    • @personwitharat9039
      @personwitharat9039 2 года назад +38

      I think they should do it again

    • @WorldWalker128
      @WorldWalker128 2 года назад +51

      Clearly, not enough people did it.

    • @Vichu.
      @Vichu. 2 года назад +13

      atleast that angry response was worth it

    • @Epicboy099
      @Epicboy099 Год назад +5

      W students

  • @mcflurryfrostie
    @mcflurryfrostie 2 года назад +11

    "all hail anime jesus"
    "THAT'S IT, 10 DAYS OF DETENTION FOR YOU"

  • @eMallard
    @eMallard 2 года назад +152

    For the last 13 years my school has complained on Google about how the chef spat in our creme brûlée. Completely random but it drove the school insane

    • @eMallard
      @eMallard 2 года назад +37

      They tried to take down the reviews but we kept on adding more, it’s become something that everyone just does.

    • @Amy_the_Lizard
      @Amy_the_Lizard 2 года назад +21

      ...Your school got Crème brûlée..? Lucky, my elementary school was involved in a Salmonella scandal...

    • @eMallard
      @eMallard 2 года назад +36

      @@Amy_the_Lizard we don’t, we had absolutely no reason to say that

  • @dkdnejdisjabw8r8271ysh
    @dkdnejdisjabw8r8271ysh 2 года назад +16

    Sometimes I come back to this video just to read the comments, because it makes me feel better about the time I wrote something like a 5 paragraph review of my old secondary school mid-nervous breakdown onto their Google Reviews and gave it 1 star.
    I got an e-mail soon after that my review was one of the most viewed for that school. I'm so sorry to that school, even if they 100% deserved it

  • @eykan_ow
    @eykan_ow 2 года назад +157

    School reviews can be some of the funniest, or darkest things you're ever going to read.

  • @dreeza5170
    @dreeza5170 2 года назад +147

    I had my mom read the review with Chinese characters (at least I think it’s Chinese, since Japanese usually has hiragana or katakana in sentences) and she said it reads like someone just tapped the predictive text suggestions.

    • @ethanwashington6789
      @ethanwashington6789 2 года назад +15

      i knew something was up with that comment, googles auto-translate has actually gotten pretty decent in the past few years

  • @thehermitgamer7009
    @thehermitgamer7009 2 года назад +72

    as someone from china i can confirm 3:07 is gibberish

    • @luckii.__17
      @luckii.__17 9 месяцев назад +5

      as someone from gibberish i can confirm 3:07 is china

    • @sygmarvexarion7891
      @sygmarvexarion7891 8 месяцев назад +2

      I imagine someone wrote something in English and then used Google translate to translate it into Chinese, and then Matt used Google translate to translate it back into English.

  • @edmcsteve2156
    @edmcsteve2156 2 года назад +70

    Never forget the time someone managed to change my school's logo on google reviews/maps to a picture of lightning mcqueen

  • @six-winged-juni
    @six-winged-juni 2 года назад +752

    My school has reviews like
    "10/10 experience :) the humans there rick rolled me :o"
    "This school has fully emofied me. My only source of happiness is staring out the window, fantasising about the beefy English teachers and the math teachers’ tight trousers which emphasises their bunda"
    But most of the reviews are either saying it's great (VERY FEW) or saying it's GOD AWFUL TO BE A STUDENT THERE (which I agree with). A lot of the its great reviews seem to come from parents.
    Apparently we have the highest rate of S/H in the town which i would, tbh, believe.
    So basically everyone seems to hate it.

    • @DuckInGameStop
      @DuckInGameStop 2 года назад +67

      are the English teachers really beefy though? I need to know this

    • @userlog2474
      @userlog2474 2 года назад +33

      What is S/H?

    • @zyerkos
      @zyerkos 2 года назад +36

      english teachers are always the finest no matter where you are huh

    • @six-winged-juni
      @six-winged-juni 2 года назад +15

      @@zyerkos i dont think theyre fine but some do apparently

    • @six-winged-juni
      @six-winged-juni 2 года назад +60

      @@userlog2474 self harm

  • @mu8023
    @mu8023 2 года назад +9

    When my dad was in school his chemistry teacher accidentally made
    mustard gas.

  • @trainosaurousrex4472
    @trainosaurousrex4472 2 года назад +43

    My school has “ambulance shows up every week, unacceptable”
    “Teacher beat up a kid”
    “The school is literally built like a prison yard” and “they care more about clothes than bullying”
    These were all recent and I can confirm every single one of them, a teacher was literally just arrested and another was kicked because of inappropriate messages to students.

  • @hey.bbyl0n
    @hey.bbyl0n 2 года назад +1382

    tldr: we bullied the school into giving us a mental health break and it worked, but the school turned emo
    during the start of the pandemic when online classes were the hot and new thing, i fondly remember the people of my now-former school basically bullying the administration into giving us a mental health break. the school responded by changing its social media profile photo to a black version of the logo (we also got the break that was desperately needed). to alleviate any judgement, the school was extremely unreasonable prior to the student body ganging up on it and everyone was getting overworked and riled up

    • @xahme3851
      @xahme3851 2 года назад +75

      oh my gosh i’m gonna have my classmates help me do thnis

    • @xahme3851
      @xahme3851 2 года назад +112

      tbh it would be funny if my school turned emo

    • @hey.bbyl0n
      @hey.bbyl0n 2 года назад +83

      @@xahme3851 if its warranted and you guys would pull through, good luck hahaha

    • @realdonutking123
      @realdonutking123 2 года назад +85

      “the school turned emo” 💀💀💀

    • @g3design637
      @g3design637 2 года назад +75

      Oh yeah, my school did that too. The entire student population decided that banning dyed hair is stupid (which it is) and completely ganged up on the staff.

  • @hamelin4088
    @hamelin4088 Год назад +30

    My school was a private Catholic school that was part of a whole other Catholic school, ten minutes from it. We always had some rivalry between my school who was basically the « second one » and the other and bigger school who was the original one, the one people know the most. Basically it was the same director that was directing these two schools, created by the same founder but in two different town who were 10 minutes apart. They had the same program, both private and Catholic and some teachers of my school were teaching there too depending on their schedule.
    At my school review, the reviews were pretty good and there were only 2 bad reviews without even any comments.
    But at the other school, there was a lot of bad reviews, mainly about the price and the terrible food they served there (During a bomb alert, we ate at this school cause our school was being investigated by the police and their bomb dogs and I admit, the food at my school was way better than theirs).
    But I think someone got lost in one of the reviews:
    Battle royal can be constructive, too bad the season pass is paying.
    -Graphics 10/20
    -Simple and basic gameplay but do the job
    -the lack of content over the seasons fornite do better..

    • @stephencaudle1766
      @stephencaudle1766 11 месяцев назад

      But have you heard of Minecraft? ◻️/10 graphics

  • @RamiSlicer
    @RamiSlicer 2 года назад +69

    I'll share some of my favs:
    "brother, give me öats" (1 star)
    "this sclhl makes em die" (1 star, mispellings are real)
    "Good, though the art teacher told me that pottery and fine art units got swapped because someone threw a dog bag like a water balloon onto one of the two pottery wheels..." (4 stars)"
    "School smells like every farm animal at once, bathrooms smell like their corresponding shits." (2 stars)

  • @spooderman6312
    @spooderman6312 2 года назад +59

    1 star "There's nothing wrong with this school, my wife left me"
    That's honestly an absolute mood

  • @emmie-c8t
    @emmie-c8t Год назад +10

    I remember one time my school didn’t fully cook their lunch one day, and half of the students got food poisoning/ threw up/ salmonella, and they all ganged up to just spam 1 star reviews on the school’s website. But there were no lawsuits, oddly enough…

  • @liamstanks1547
    @liamstanks1547 2 года назад +276

    0:30 This reminds me of my own fun story where in high school I managed to get my hands on an unused locker in the band room which had an outlet in the back. Set up a coffee maker in there, had a full setup with multiple teas, 3 coffee brands, Ramen, disposable cups, bowls, & silverware. Hid it all behind a bookbag in the front of the locker. I used it daily before class, before and after marching band practice, it was great. One day the principal walked in and caught us in there after school using it, truly a highlight of my high school experience was the next day hearing the announcement over the intercom formally banning home appliances, even better was the next year seeing that rule added to the handbook and explicitly pointed out in a beginning of the school year seminar.

    • @seanhartnett79
      @seanhartnett79 2 года назад +7

      Lol

    • @ayyylmao101
      @ayyylmao101 2 года назад +16

      Kudos to you for the minimalist set-up XDDDD

    • @DannyDevitoOffical-TrustMeBro
      @DannyDevitoOffical-TrustMeBro 2 года назад +40

      What a jerk for ruining your perfect set up, though. How on earth can you expect a sleep deprived teenager from surviving school without caffeine and some form of cheap sustenance I hesitate to call food?

  • @ERROR_V1X-N
    @ERROR_V1X-N 2 года назад +289

    My old high school was a patchwork prison-like edifice. There were also places under the stairs where people went to… you know…
    I of course never participated in those activities but was unfortunate enough to witness them as a result of all my classes being on different floors from another. I hated that school.
    Yes, American public schools are just as bad in reality as they are portrayed in the media.

    • @viljamtheninja
      @viljamtheninja 2 года назад +97

      No, I don't know! Smoke weed? Make sweet love? Talk about anime? WHAT DID THEY DO UNDER THE STAIRS?

    • @jacobeii
      @jacobeii 2 года назад +92

      @@viljamtheninja all of the above, at the same time

    • @noyoucantnoicantnowecantsostop
      @noyoucantnoicantnowecantsostop 2 года назад +44

      @@jacobeii make sweet love and watch anime in the same sentence? Nahhhhh

    • @JaneAustenAteMyCat
      @JaneAustenAteMyCat 2 года назад +5

      ew

    • @Canadianbacon-s9n
      @Canadianbacon-s9n 2 года назад

      You shouldve finished inside one of tge girls bro. Thots are king

  • @tanyafrancis9422
    @tanyafrancis9422 2 года назад +17

    I was reading google reviews for a school near mine and it said “I drank holy water and got a detention” He rated it 5 stars 💀💀💀

  • @dripsader5325
    @dripsader5325 2 года назад +87

    2:22 why is this the most terrifying thing I’ve heard?

    • @aguyidk5255
      @aguyidk5255 2 года назад +9

      Probably because of scary urban legends

  • @maciejhyla7503
    @maciejhyla7503 2 года назад +78

    Here's a small collection of reviews from my old secondary school
    "DO NOT APPLY FOR THIS SCHOOL.
    Worst school ever, teachers only listen to them and when there’s a fight they always go to one side and the other side is always in trouble.
    Once a 20 year old man came inside trying to fight year8 and he pushed threw teachers
    Kids get jumped after school
    Food is bad
    Teachers can’t teach" - 1/5 stars
    "Almost died" - 1/5 stars
    "Hepatitis A" - 1/5 stars

    • @dizzy_jump
      @dizzy_jump Год назад +30

      “Hepatitis A”
      best review of all time

    • @error_tryagain_4049
      @error_tryagain_4049 Год назад +12

      Excuse me, but
      *A L M O S T D I E D ? ? ?*
      ⁉ ⁉ ⁉ 👁 👄 👁 ⁉ ⁉ ⁉

  • @freyjamontgomery5453
    @freyjamontgomery5453 2 года назад +10

    If you found the google reviews for my school, the majority of them would be talking about the lack of chairs.
    There was no lack of chairs.
    Every one was pretty sure most of our budget was spent on chairs. There were chairs under the stage. There were chairs lining one of the halls.
    (There are also a lot of complaints about the principal. She was… an interesting character who may have had a bad understanding of emergencies.)

  • @granautismo69
    @granautismo69 2 года назад +302

    I'm autistic and today I was suffering from sensory overload because of the scorching weather, disgusting, slimy sweat, and people creating cacophony. It had also been a long day far from home, so on top of that I was shattered. Those two factors combined and made me feel terrible and overwhelmed when I got home. This video distracted me, changed my mood and made me feel a lot better. Cheers, mate. You truly are a national treasure.

    • @philipphalter926
      @philipphalter926 Год назад +18

      I'm autistic as well and i can relate to that. these videos have a therapeutic effect

    • @yamiyukia
      @yamiyukia Год назад +10

      Matt Rose’s videos also make me calm down whenever I have a autistic sensory overload

    • @airam1721
      @airam1721 Год назад +2

      I think i just live with that, my classmates are loud asf and I always return home exhausted. But would it make a difference if I didn't have autism? I guess it would because they are energetic af and don't suffer from such an tiring feeling, but Matt Rose's videos wouldn't have a difference to me, they are just simply therapy to hear

    • @Auglur1
      @Auglur1 Год назад +6

      "im autistic" - msm pfp
      SAME BRO IM AUTISTIC AND I LOVE MSM
      also im glad his videos make you feel better they do the same :)

    • @pikacope
      @pikacope Год назад +9

      Dude yes i’m autistic aswell and Matt Rose’s videos especially are so calming. Hope you’re doing well.

  • @tfr
    @tfr 2 года назад +236

    This is a Google review of my school:
    "Couple of things about the canteen, the sausage rolls are quite the marvel, I believe they may contain more oil than the USA could ever want. The mini pizzas are pretty impressive to, you'd think all the doughy bread would be able to soak up the grease, but the cheese refuses to dry up, containing enough grease to give me and my family all heart disease. The PTSD I have after eating the rocky road slice is remarkable, if you don't break your teeth while biting into it, the amount of sugar will have your teeth removed soon after. Chocolate slice. Even just typing that I'm getting flashbacks, this form of ''slice' that they sell is denser than antivaxxers, which is about as dense as a neutron star. The milkshakes here remind me of LaCroix flavoured water, but they're not even flavoured, where LaCroix had: hint of hint of hint of strawberry, these milkshakes have nothing, just some milk with some syrup spewed into it, sometimes without even a small stir.
    I would say more but as we speak my heart is beginning to fail, so fair well.
    P.S. The prices are trash"

    • @jammingpython8986
      @jammingpython8986 2 года назад +46

      The person who wrote this review needs to become an author.

    • @shadowgirlm6446
      @shadowgirlm6446 2 года назад +20

      Alright, I think this is my favorite review

    • @wob1918
      @wob1918 2 года назад

      @𝙀𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙁𝙤𝙤𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙩 bot

    • @jefuru5788
      @jefuru5788 2 года назад +13

      Okay this was definitely Gordon Ramsay's school

    • @myyoutubeaccount4167
      @myyoutubeaccount4167 Год назад

      Lmao

  • @lostinthesauce9319
    @lostinthesauce9319 2 года назад +7

    reading google reviews for schools in my area is one of my favourite past times, glad the trend is picking up

  • @soyeonshin6486
    @soyeonshin6486 2 года назад +144

    Back at my old school there was a teacher who would throw bags at students and he'd constantly go on about how much he hated his wife and how the dog was better than her.
    We'll call him Mr. Bob for reference (That wasn't his real name though) He would trash talk the other teachers in our class and he'd never actually teach what he was meant to be teaching. He'd put students on the spot all the time asking them about nonsense things that happened in his life, then getting offended if we never remembered. He used to throw people out of the classroom a lot, literally. He somehow never got caught which baffled me because apparently the school had security cameras everywhere.
    Nobody ever told on him or anything, though. No one could even take him seriously and my classmates would constantly make jokes about him. He was an absolutely mental, but it was fun being in his class due to how chaotic it was.

    • @soyeonshin6486
      @soyeonshin6486 2 года назад +51

      To be honest, there were quite a lot of weird teachers at that school now that I think about it.
      There was a male gym teacher who would go into changing rooms whilst girls were getting changed into their swimsuits. He'd never go into the boys' rooms, but he'd always go into the girls'.
      There was also a teacher who would constantly fart right in front of the whole class with absolutely no remorse whatsoever. At first people found it funny, but after that it started to get annoying and everyone would complain about how the whole classroom smelt like sweat and boiled eggs.
      There was a teacher who would go absolutely ballistic if you did anything wrong, and by ballistic I mean she'd have a whole temper tantrum. She once went crazy and I mean WILD because some students walked up the wrong side of the stairs when there wasn't even anyone else there. You should've seen her, she was like a rabid hamster.
      There was a teacher who'd just walk around with a little cup of salt and throw it over his shoulder for absolutely no reason.
      There was an elderly male teacher who was constantly getting into dating scandals with students.
      And many more...

    • @guffingtonreal
      @guffingtonreal 2 года назад

      @@soyeonshin6486 At my school the former art teacher was a huge cock. Forced us to work in silence so it wasn't a very fun environment for a creative thing. One time he threw a stool at a student, and another time before we were even there he was locked in a cupboard by the class. If you talked to him outside he was like fine but then in class he was so stuck up. New one's some blonde bird.

    • @stargazer31
      @stargazer31 2 года назад +23

      This is pretty wild!
      At my old school one of our teachers got fired for:
      -Throwing a chair at a student
      - Deliberately giving students really low marks
      - Drinking vodka in class

    • @gabrielc.4906
      @gabrielc.4906 2 года назад +21

      @@soyeonshin6486 Ah, I can explain the cup of salt! Well... sort of. It's a superstition that throwing salt over your left shoulder prevents bad luck. Still really weird that your teacher was doing it in the school though.

    • @soyeonshin6486
      @soyeonshin6486 2 года назад

      @𝙀𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙁𝙤𝙤𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙩lord No you don't lmao. You should be ashamed of this fucking video you made ruclips.net/video/TIcxXJHNqPc/видео.html

  • @VaporwavesJK
    @VaporwavesJK 2 года назад +66

    A review my friend left on my school : "5 STARS I GOT TO WATCH THE HEADTEACHER GET HEAD LOCKED AND DROP KICKEEDDD!"
    worst part is that it was true, we all recount the day with much joy, best part was that everyone was running through the corridors trying to get videos and the other teachers didnt even care bcs our school is just badshit crazy lmao

    • @osheridan
      @osheridan 2 года назад +6

      Rip head teacher

    • @VaporwavesJK
      @VaporwavesJK 2 года назад

      @@osheridan may he rest in piss

  • @banana2k1
    @banana2k1 9 месяцев назад +10

    2:19 sounds like the description for a horror game lol

  • @crablover33
    @crablover33 2 года назад +92

    I can already feel that this is going to be amazing

  • @cheogie8079
    @cheogie8079 2 года назад +95

    when i was in middle school i wrote a 2 paragraph long review on my school about how much i hated this one teacher, she wasnt that bad really now that i think about it.

    • @pyrobeast_jack
      @pyrobeast_jack 2 года назад +1

      aw damn LOL

    • @Insanebehaviordude
      @Insanebehaviordude 2 года назад +26

      I also had an irrational hate for a teacher because she once told me to shut up when I was going very loud and because didnt like her shirts. I was 10 in my defense, she was actually fine.

    • @rosykindbunny1313
      @rosykindbunny1313 2 года назад +4

      @@Insanebehaviordude I don't think teachers are allowed to tell a 10 year old to shut up...

    • @Ahumanpersonthing_
      @Ahumanpersonthing_ 2 года назад +3

      @@rosykindbunny1313 I mean, if you heard a bunch of ten year olds yelling for your entire career you'd probably snap too

    • @rosykindbunny1313
      @rosykindbunny1313 2 года назад +1

      @@Ahumanpersonthing_ True

  • @PixelPalettes
    @PixelPalettes 8 месяцев назад +4

    The middle school I went to has reviews that either praise the school or call it one of the worst things they’ve ever experienced.
    The positive reviews are usually parents of gifted students with no issues, while the negative reviews are from students who were relentlessly bullied while the staff did nothing to help.
    I think the staff only helped me because I was a good student, but it still sucked.

  • @omartalalmusanashwanicsbr1380
    @omartalalmusanashwanicsbr1380 2 года назад +58

    As a bees nest, I can confirm, I was eaten on a schoolyard

  • @isdbisdb
    @isdbisdb 2 года назад +76

    Actual review from my school
    "Kind of a surreal experience, most of my years going here I was kind of freaked out by the glowing cat in the bathrooms. I'm pretty sure it hated me because anytime I would touch it's spines I would pass out. You get used to the eyes of the ceilings watching your every move..I mean not really but you kind of do. However the freaky janitor that looks like what you can only describe as a mix between A flower and donald duck will always freak me out. Other than that however the school was good." 3 stars.

    • @ochuspin
      @ochuspin 2 года назад +23

      You can’t convince me that the kid who wrote that wasn’t on heavy drugs during their time in school

  • @ainikyu551
    @ainikyu551 Год назад +2

    My school had a review by someone complaining that they thought it was a Taco Bell.
    I’m not kidding.

  • @bread-gz3rl
    @bread-gz3rl 2 года назад +105

    My school reviews are about our woodshop teacher (best guy ever AND he drives a 1986 Ford F250 diesel) or about the time that I kinda created a full scale riot because one of the lunch supervisors was pissed about me sitting in a corner 50ft away from any other human eating a burger. Like my options are go sit with a bunch of dickheads or be 50ft away from everyone, apparently I wasn't social distancing even though I was fuckin 50 feet away from anyone in the god damn room. I now carry a tape measure at all times. There was also a time where there was a staged fire alarm test for undercover police to do a drug raid, ended up finding 3 lockers full of drugs and weapons, so yeah. Nova Scotia is fucked.

    • @cocksucker_suckscock
      @cocksucker_suckscock 2 года назад +8

      Duuude I loved my old woodshop teacher, he made his own bacon at home (straight from the pig) and brought it in (but a lot of the kids were nazis so I dropped the class)

    • @grace.h69
      @grace.h69 2 года назад +13

      @@cocksucker_suckscock aren't you the one that said your dad cursed a locker?- (just wanted to know)

    • @cocksucker_suckscock
      @cocksucker_suckscock 2 года назад +6

      @@grace.h69 indeed I am!

    • @bread-gz3rl
      @bread-gz3rl 2 года назад +6

      @@cocksucker_suckscock i got a free 80s shop vac from mine lol, although I'm a dumbass and fucked the motor trying to replace the bearings. Worked good for the 3 weeks it wasn't a scrap metal bucket.

    • @jimmynuetronrblx8628
      @jimmynuetronrblx8628 2 года назад +1

      Jesus, I didn't know Canada could get that bad

  • @arandomcommenter412
    @arandomcommenter412 2 года назад +60

    2:40 That one got me, no reason in particular.

    • @cart4092
      @cart4092 2 года назад +15

      who puts their weed in the locker😭

    • @FernLake
      @FernLake 2 года назад +10

      EHH

    • @PineappIePineapple
      @PineappIePineapple Год назад

      I once took this massive dump and it got stuck and it wouldn't go down the toilet. I had to put bleach on it so it would dissolve and go down

  • @jadeparelius
    @jadeparelius 2 года назад +2

    I still love the fact that one of the things that show up in the search bar when you look up my middle school is "[school name] violence"

  • @tingyang8743
    @tingyang8743 2 года назад +45

    2:14 So specific 😂😂🥄

  • @artbookgaming
    @artbookgaming 2 года назад +95

    I've been to a few schools so here are some reviews:
    Elementary school (ages 6 to 12): 1/5 stars, would give it 0 if I could. Was supposed to be a bullying free zone but all that meant was that they would brush it under the carpet so they could keep announcing their bullying free status.
    High school (ages 15 to 18): 5/5 some of the kids were brainless morons and the art history teacher has passion for hating students, but the rest of the staff and students were very cool and enjoyed our memes as long as they were somewhat on topic. + if you go on the art program you can abandon Swedish or math after the first year and we all know that the large majority of Finnish students hate being forced to learn Swedish and the rest hate math with a passion.
    University: 4/5 idk haven't been there that long, kinda lost on everything and can't remember what I'm supposed to be doing.

    • @cocksucker_suckscock
      @cocksucker_suckscock 2 года назад +13

      What do you do in Finland ages 13-14? Go into a cocoon? Hibernate?

    • @G59forlife.
      @G59forlife. 2 года назад +9

      @@cocksucker_suckscock I kidnapped him and held him for 2 years

    • @cocksucker_suckscock
      @cocksucker_suckscock 2 года назад +3

      @@G59forlife. serious Bond villain shit my dude

  • @BRAINROT3444
    @BRAINROT3444 2 года назад +6

    One time about two years ago, this kid at my school reached some super high level on Google reviews, meaning that he can change the image for a the school and other things, man literally changed the picture that shows when you search our school to thanos

  • @snarkiwi
    @snarkiwi 2 года назад +57

    Love trying to imagine these all being for the same school

    • @StuffandThings_
      @StuffandThings_ 2 года назад +6

      That sounds like the opportunity for a great TV series

    • @yorkshireball_animations
      @yorkshireball_animations 2 года назад +1

      @@StuffandThings_ interrobang

    • @StuffandThings_
      @StuffandThings_ 2 года назад

      @@yorkshireball_animations LOL that would honestly be a great title for such a series...

  • @SB_0017
    @SB_0017 2 года назад +60

    I’ve seen some reviews of my school on Google Maps
    One guy said the teachers locked him/her up for no given reason so the school deserves to be burned down
    But the funniest review by far was a now deleted review where a drunk teacher in their car hit the student on a bike on the last day of term

    • @3st3st77
      @3st3st77 2 года назад +17

      I get locked up in school -> school should be burned down. I don't see how that could backfire.

  • @JustAFishBeingAFish
    @JustAFishBeingAFish 3 месяца назад +1

    One of the ones for my old school ends with
    "Smells like adult depression", this is extremely accurate.

  • @themysticautistic5449
    @themysticautistic5449 2 года назад +27

    One of the best school reviews I’ve ever read was “Place was fine if you can ignore all of the red necks”. The reviewer gave the school a 1/5 stars.

  • @Marliemac
    @Marliemac 2 года назад +275

    According to my school reviews there's an overall agreement that teaching methods are outdated and is purely a school focused on thier football program. I couldn't agree more. Also that the bathrooms sometimes smell like Marijuana 😂

    • @walugusgrudenburg3068
      @walugusgrudenburg3068 2 года назад +51

      That's just literally any U.S public school.

    • @alphavasson5387
      @alphavasson5387 2 года назад +3

      @@walugusgrudenburg3068 That's exactly what I was going to say lol

    • @madeleinep.828
      @madeleinep.828 2 года назад +32

      I mean, I guess they call them "high" schools for a reason

    • @Marliemac
      @Marliemac 2 года назад +8

      @@walugusgrudenburg3068 Yes, bonus points if it's located in the south

    • @djroscurro9859
      @djroscurro9859 2 года назад +3

      *I wonder why*

  • @lynxproud
    @lynxproud Год назад +21

    2:09
    this is just a bookmark for myself lmao

  • @precise5513
    @precise5513 2 года назад +83

    1:52 "I ate a bees nest!"

  • @paggetio8847
    @paggetio8847 2 года назад +28

    I like how one of the more professional seeming reviews as well as of the few containing the correct grammar is by a squirrel called creamy piss

  • @Rein2039.
    @Rein2039. Год назад +2

    My school was HELL.The food sucked most of the time was either raw,frozen or burnt inside out.The teachers were crazy would literally scream if i child did something wrong,were lazy,didn't teach or set homework,got people who didn't do anything in trouble,didn'tdo anything about bullying or fight and when this one kid who would always do bad stuff never got in trouble... he punched two kid in the face and one went to hospital and other things. One teacher was homophobic,transphobic,sexist, rude towards Muslims and racist towards most black students and middle eastern people.... She was black. Another was racist and called a child a slur and another screamed at a 4 year old because he wrote a detailed sentence. Oh and we had 3 headmasters in less than 2 years

  • @organizer.spaztasticc3541
    @organizer.spaztasticc3541 2 года назад +79

    (Long comment. Tl;dr at the bottom)
    Reading all of these reviews and comments made me realize that I went to a really good school. The main issue I had was that near the end of my time there, there was a change of principals, and she made it her mission to take everything fun and cool about the school and replace it with STEM. Our school was already a great balance of academic material and fun activities, and the imbalance caused everything else to suffer.
    Before, we had the fall festival, with petting zoos and pumpkin painting, pizza and nachos in the cafeteria, heck there were even pony rides, too. After the regime switched up, we had a scientific-centered fair. the school literally charged two bucks a person to play in a pit of cardboard because it helped kids 'think critically' or some bs like that.
    I've heard from people who have parents that still work there that this principal habitually screams at the teachers she doesn't like. The turnover rates for employment are awful (Which is a shame, because I loved almost every teacher at that school and they made my experience better). One teacher who vocally opposed the principal got fired. The school is actually in danger of losing its special statuses, and while I still disliked how hard there were forced down our throats, there were still some good things about having them.
    I'm still shocked that I managed to finish out my years at that school. It wasn't without a support network and help from classmates, teachers, and family. I think that having the choice to homeschool (My sister at the time was already doing so) at least made everything bearable, that I could pull out if it ever got to be too much. But I finished my last year there fueled by spite alone.
    Tl;dr: My school was awesome and I loved it until we got a new headmistress, then she sucked all the fun out of it and everyone (Staff and student body alike) thinks it's miserable. I'm really debating going to leave a google review, but I know it won't change much of anything. Besides, they might be able to trace it back to me and I don't know if that could cause further complications, so out of respect to my previous teachers, I probably won't.

    • @birdsindatrap
      @birdsindatrap 2 года назад

      wow they sound like an asshole who screams slurs in call of duty

    • @somerandomcube
      @somerandomcube 2 года назад +8

      Reminds me of my old school a bit
      There was a good principal, then she transferred to a different school, and then the vice principal became the principal, and then everything went to shit.

    • @WHATSAHANDLEIDKIDK
      @WHATSAHANDLEIDKIDK Год назад

      You know it's long when the TL;DR IS LO G

  • @sealfan8
    @sealfan8 2 года назад +17

    Once saw a review on my school saying "I've been stuck in a cubicle for 6 hours, help"

  • @NotesFromTheVoid
    @NotesFromTheVoid 2 года назад +4

    there was some minor drama at my old school where all the kids started posting negative Google reviews, then the people who did that got told off and told to take them down, causing more people to post negative Google reviews

  • @christianb1707
    @christianb1707 2 года назад +77

    Dang, I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who cries while drinking soda.

    • @nonsensicalhumanoid
      @nonsensicalhumanoid 2 года назад +3

      Or maybe, just maybe, that was you.

    • @christianb1707
      @christianb1707 2 года назад +1

      @@nonsensicalhumanoid Shhhhhh

    • @xxx-ie9ic
      @xxx-ie9ic 2 года назад +1

      I kind of do because the carbonation feels so strong it's like getting punched in the nose.

    • @Munchi3moo
      @Munchi3moo 10 месяцев назад

      Ehh my eyes water sometimes bc of that so I guess I do too

  • @soupslush
    @soupslush 2 года назад +204

    here's a review from my school: not mine tho
    I loved this school. I believed in this school. I have an older child that did very well at this school. However, my younger child needed special services, and if your child does as well (or you think they might but you're not sure yet), this is NOT the school to send them to! They never talked to me about retention, and now that we're in another district to which it's obvious that this is what she needed, she's really too old for it to be beneficial anymore. MOREOVER, it took me something like 2 1/2 years to get them to test her for a learning disability (as well as a very strongly worded letter from her psychiatrist, who kept telling me that this was a terrible school for these services). Then when she finally was tested, SURPRISE, she had a learning disability! Then it took them almost a year after that to get an IEP in place. Then she received services for a year and they were like, "Wow! She's doing so well she probably won't need services next year." I'm pretty sure I saw red at that point. I get her in another district and she's even further behind than I thought. Not only is it disheartening, and she's much further behind than she needs to be when I've been fighting for her education since she was 18 months old, but I'm pretty sure some of the stuff they pulled was borderline illegal. Please look into public school districts, as well as FREE IEP Specialists/Advocates through the Michigan Department of Education website. I wish I had known these things five years ago. The options for Dance and Strings aren't worth the trade off of a real education. There's a reason that they're currently graded at only a 3. Take heed.

    • @MatingPress
      @MatingPress 2 года назад

      Michigan sucks

    • @guffingtonreal
      @guffingtonreal 2 года назад +11

      Most schools are awful at SEN

    • @wildman510
      @wildman510 2 года назад +9

      This sounds very similar to my school, went on for years till like 8th grade before getting diagnosed with adhd

    • @endarus6053
      @endarus6053 Год назад +5

      One of my schools(Military family, we moved a lot) thought i was “special ed” because we werent sure if i was autistic or not(borderline, more ocd and adhd) and they would lock me in a room alone with toys whenever i had “tantrums”.
      I took advantage of this and had faked tantrums over nothing so i could skip classes. I dont care about the opinions of teachers who dont give a single fuck about me. If they have the heartlessness to place a child alone in a locked room then they would get my full wrath via my ability to out-shenanigain anyone in a ten mile radius of my existance.

  • @PinkLemonadeRat
    @PinkLemonadeRat Год назад +1

    Actual google review of my school: “I wanted a hamburger, but they gave me depression” lmao accurate

  • @michellechair
    @michellechair 2 года назад +44

    ok ive got a lot of google reviews from my old school:
    when an esports team was introduced, DOZENS of kids would leave reviews to complain or praise this choice (most of the complaints were saying things like "add pubg as a game for the esports team," etc.) some kids even from other schools that were friends of students would say things like "i don't go here, but the esports team is pretty rad."
    another of my favourites is one of the top reviews for the school just saying that the old principal looked very similar to boss nass from star wars.
    and finally (not to toot my own horn here), my favourite review is the one i left myself which says: "one time i went to the bathroom and there was a mcdonald's cheeseburger with one bite taken out of it in the toilet bowl! awesome :) it was a bit soggy but it still tasted good, 3 stars."

  • @Clouditivity
    @Clouditivity 2 года назад +145

    I remember the principle yelling the school's mascot randomly. Just yelling
    "Go bulldogs!"
    And everyone in the auditorium was silent until he awkwardly said
    "Do you all not know the school mascot?"

  • @itzjd3569
    @itzjd3569 11 месяцев назад +2

    There was this one from my school: "Absolutely awful service, had to repeatedly ask for my order, and they kept saying some weird things like "Sir, this is a school", i just wanted my quarter-pounder of fresh beef, 2 slices of melted cheese, mustard, ketchup, pickles, onions and lettuce. I was even denied a drink. If I could give 0 stars I would."

  • @jerseygrace
    @jerseygrace 2 года назад +22

    The fact that Matt puts a skull emoji in the title means he’s getting tired; it’s a cry for help. Blink twice if you need rescue, Matt.

  • @RED32241
    @RED32241 2 года назад +28

    My school had a review that was "great school to send your kids if you want them to grow up to be a roadman drug dealer" and I think about it often cause I like to think that who ever left it is living their best life

    • @seanhartnett79
      @seanhartnett79 2 года назад +1

      Hey, that is an honest profession.

    • @TheMenaceHimself2006
      @TheMenaceHimself2006 2 года назад

      @@seanhartnett79 Authorities thinkin otherwise

    • @seanhartnett79
      @seanhartnett79 2 года назад +2

      @@TheMenaceHimself2006 so what? If someone wants to buy drugs, nothing can stop them, might as well regulate it,

    • @TheMenaceHimself2006
      @TheMenaceHimself2006 2 года назад

      @@seanhartnett79 *Nothing?*

    • @seanhartnett79
      @seanhartnett79 2 года назад

      @@TheMenaceHimself2006 we have tried everything. Let’s see imprisonment. Randomly bombing drug dealing countries. Starting death squads in those countries.

  • @jKherty
    @jKherty 2 года назад +2

    The three schools for kids (idk the equivalent for British or American) I went to have been closed for years, so no reviews. But the middle school have a few reviews but only parents, and the two high schools I went to: the first, parents. The second: praising the massive internal forest, nothing else. It was indeed, large and awesome. A great place to take a break from literally everything.
    I miss being young.

  • @laurabii99
    @laurabii99 2 года назад +19

    i want to care about anything as much as the person who cared enough about their school's spoon depth to leave a google review

  • @glitchedseraphim
    @glitchedseraphim 2 года назад +73

    Would give my old school 5 stars just from the fact that a kid named Ryan illegally sold sodas out of the back of his car since the healthy schools initiative banned our soda machines. He told me he made $300 a month from it

  • @puffosgamingoldchannel5992
    @puffosgamingoldchannel5992 2 года назад +27

    I recently made a review for my previous primary school, it had a lot of bullies and the teachers did absolutely nothing to stop them. All they did was tell them to say sorry which obviously is a lot easier to say it than to mean it.
    The school food was also cancer, literally, they couldn't cook for shit.
    The bullying continued for six whole years, in which for two years I was severely depressed as a 12 year old. Eventually I started to not care too much and instead long to get home. There was a time where I literally cried myself to sleep.
    Oh, and I was also sexually assaulted (slapped on the ass), so there's that. I was 14 at the time so I did not know too much how to handle it.
    If you have any questions about the school I will gladly answer them as I do not care whatsoever what happens to that school, it can go disappear in a sinkhole for all I care.

  • @atleynater
    @atleynater 2 года назад +9

    my favorite review for one for one of the schools i went to has to be "the food was so undercooked it was still meowing"

  • @notanemovampire
    @notanemovampire 2 года назад +10

    i had a ghetto middle school and i never realized it till people said that weekly bomb threats were NOT normal

  • @krazykarmen
    @krazykarmen 2 года назад +3

    My schools reviews... Jesus
    "DO NOT SEND YOUR CHILD HERE. Mrs. - (who has somehow weasled her way into being vice principal) is one of the most incompetent and corrupt people I have ever had the displeasure of dealing with. Until such time as she is fired this school should be avoided."
    "Would be two stars but the bus ran over two pedestrians the other day"

  • @viviris
    @viviris 2 года назад +56

    0:47
    Question, how many is an acceptable amount of bomb threats? Asking for a friend

    • @kemzito
      @kemzito 2 года назад +20

      10

    • @viviris
      @viviris 2 года назад +15

      @@kemzito thanks bro very helpful

    • @KeiTh0r
      @KeiTh0r 2 года назад +12

      @@kemzito 10 every day or year?

    • @Dante_Sparda_DMC
      @Dante_Sparda_DMC 2 года назад +7

      American schools:

    • @viviris
      @viviris 2 года назад +9

      @@KeiTh0r uh oh, I just assumed it was per day, I didn’t consider that it could be less.
      Too late now I guess (you might want to evacuate the country)