More Shocking Behaviors From New 'Expat' Arrivals
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- Опубликовано: 23 авг 2024
- Some people's behaviors are just weird ... Don't let this be you!
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Unfortunately, you're dealing with the blessings and "curse" of being a content creator and entrepreneur. You're sharing your life experiences with thousands of viewers, subscribers, and potential clients, which ties directly into your relocation business. We, who follow your content, eventually start feeling like we know you personally, although we really don't. Those who become clients and actually work with you to find a home mistakenly believe that you and your family automatically become their friends afterward. But that's not how it works. You are in business, you're providing a service, and as you've said, once your services have been rendered, the business transaction is done. It's just business. Not sure why some people don't understand that.
Disclaimer: Friendship Not Included!
😂😂😂
I like that 😂😂😂
That Part! 🤣
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With change one can almost assume there is an inevitable amount of stress especially when the change is so extreme, a different language and culture. Maybe he could form a kind of social group of expats that meet once a week at some restaurant or coffeehouse -- if they have coffeehouses in Mexico. I think a big part of his being overwhelmed is because of this. His customers can share experiences and exchange tips on adjusting to the change, knowing where things are, and sharing the pluses and minuses of their new experience. Maybe then he could attend one hour a week and leave the meeting as I'm sure attendees would form friendships and probably meet for hours. There is power in numbers. Maybe once a month he could have a big party around his swimming pool as it looks like he has a dream of a place! He could create a kind of mecca for expats or even clients that come for 6 months, "snow birds".
It’s silly for ppl to think your services include being their new bestie.
Amen 😂😂😂
I feel ya, Cartess. I’m an introvert too. I feel very uncomfortable in crowds, especially with loud, boisterous conversations. I don’t need much social interaction, and am easily entertained. You’re a very likeable person so I can see why you’re in high demand. lol.
thank u for your kind words
It's like wanting your real estate agent to hang out with you and be going out with after you buy your house.
jejejeje
I was about to say the exact same thing! This gentleman provides a service for you and information we may need and that is it! He’s not responsible for our happiness after that!
Serving the public is wild. 😅
That part 😂🤣😂
Cartess don’t sweat the small stuff. Too often people allow others to take up space in their head. 😂 You rendered your services. You don’t owe anyone an explanation. There will always be people who reach out and have unrealistic expectations. Blessings! ❤
True true true. Thank u for watching
@@MoveAbroadandThrive -You are Blessed! ❤️
Omg, I am so sorry that you experienced this Cartess. YOU are NOT our friend you are our resettlement MENTOR. 😊Learning from all of your videos. Great video. I respect your advice and time. Again, it hurts to know the expectations of some. Get rest with your family Cartess, thanks for sharing.
You're the best! Thanks for watching
I am an introvert and enjoy ME time and when I do hangout I prefer the company of my little family, but with that being said I understand that it's human nature to want to get to know others. I get it. Even at times with my loner introverted self I long for the companionship of others.
I did not have time to watch your entire video, but I did get the gist of it.
I retired and moved to Mexico two years ago. I am an introvert, so I do not require a lot of social interaction with others, but I do enjoy meeting up with other folks every now and then, if for no other reason than to just feel like I'm not a total hermit.
I found that in my community, there are Facebook groups that will post different events, anything from a night of Salsa dancing to a day hanging out at a local beach, maybe to have lunch and just swimming and chatting.
I find this is a perfect way for me to retain my perfect mix of solitude and also make me feel like I belong to a network of friends and acquaintances.
Perhaps the guy you talk about can try this method. I'm sure there must be Facebook groups such as these in Merida.
These folks are WAY too needy. They act like disgruntled CHILDREN; I'm so confused why you now are responsible for their lives?! 🙄
That's why some of them are moving out of the US.
Amen :)
Great conversation Cartess. No extra explanation needed. Keep doing your thang. 👍🏾
You should have told that man, “ain’t nobody commin to see you Otis!” lol
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😂 Cartess! I love you man❤ I'm laughing because I totally get both sides of what you're saying. Watching you for so long yes we Feel like an honorary family member 😅 We see the videos with you Robert, and Angel and we can visualize ourselves not just there but there with YOU ALL😊 For this reason when I made my first trip to Mexico I didn't come to Merida. Why I chose to use the skills you have taught us in visiting other parts of Mexico. Was it a bit scary, a little bit but I reminded my family Cartess and Tia Nikki has given out a lot of good resources now it's time to use them. Mom kept wanting to see y'all. Yes, we are strangers to you and you are LIKE family for your subscribers. Let them know though, I'm a professional first! #Imabusinessman
Unfortunately, a lot of people are emotionally unstable and needy! From one introvert to another… I can only do small amounts of talking and interacting with people!!
Cartess I certainly understand where you’re coming from. I’m from New York and moved to Charlotte and every time people from my hometown move here to Charlotte they think we’re supposed hang out or sit up in each other house. Listen, we attended school together are now grown. I didn’t hangout with you when we lived in the same city, so why the heck you think we’re going to hangout now. I am an introvert to the 10th power. Some people irritate my soul and I just enjoy my own company. I travel the world solo and love it. People need to find their own happiness. It’s not your responsibility to entertain folks after services are rendered. This isn’t Cartess island they need to get out and find their way.
I live in Charlotte too. Moved here many years ago. I’ve settled into my true nature which is peaceful introvert/empath. My days of trying to be in the mix are over. Give me a stack of books, my shows, hobbies, occasional phone calls with friends and I’m good.
People tend to want our company because we are easy going and giving. They don’t realize that too much attention and socializing is draining for introverts/empaths.
I’m looking for a new city. Time for a change. I wish Merida wasn’t so hot. My search continues. So grateful for RUclips. So much great content.
That was a weird reaction. Please be careful people are insane. Stick to your policies. I’m glad you are sharing this because I have a hard time being firm and being too nice so it’s a lesson for me as well.
Especially from a man!!! 🤷🏽♀️
Don't be sorry. This is not your first video on this subject. The only thing that you owe people is the service that they paid for.
Gracias. I appreciate you :)
Sad that you even have to do a video about this. Keep doing what you're doing.
Buys a pair of shoes from the shoe salesman and then emails him: I see how you shoe salesman move in Merida😡. Goes to the hospital for an injury and doesn't hear back from the doctor and sends an email: I see how you doctors move in Merida😡. Goes to the restaurant and orders a meal and doesn't hear back from the server, so sends an email to the rstablishment saying: I see how your servers mov in Merida.😡 Are you friggin kidding me!!!🤣🤣🤣😭
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😂😂😂
You and I are so much alike. I am shy by nature and I am a loner. It is hard for me to be around people. You owe no one a explanation.
i was afraid to talk in school jejeje ... I'd start sweating
I think I love your pool as much as you do😂 love that shallow platform tp chill on..u need a good float lounger 💯
Good idea about the float lounge. Gonna look for one tomorrow :)
Cartess I used a realtor when I moved to Merida almost 4 years ago. Once her service was rendered her job was done. We still converse now and then on real-estate prospects (working on buying another property in Santa Clara). But we don't hang out. People need to find hobbies to occupy their time. Also, I am an introvert like you and too much time around a lot of people sucks the life out of me. Keep up the good work! 😊
Be really you’ve said this from The beginning. People are very needy and they will drain every bit of energy you have. Don’t worry too much.
Cartess take it from a more mature person that it’s taken 50+ years to learn:
1. Lots of peeps feel entitled
2. You have no control over what others think, say, or do
3. Those same entitled peeps don’t have boundaries and don’t respect others boundaries!
I have to praise you for how you handle difficult peeps! They would ‘ve given them the side eye!😁
You are correct. You have to take care of yourself and your family. Enjoy your family. Prepare for your own retirement.
Gee Cartess you're our RUclips rockstar!
We can't help but fawn all over you lol!
👍🏾🎯💯❤️😀😂
You are friendly on your videos and people feel like they know you and then they feel entitled to your personal time. People need therapy!
Don’t sweat it Cartess 😊
I hate that you have to do this but it is needed! Cartess you were a blessing to us when we came and also to my sister as well. Our personalities are exactly alike and I agree with everything you said. People don't know you and shouldn't act like it. Praying for you and the fam! Love your authenticity it is encouraging to me!
Maybe you can have a monthly gathering with the people you have worked with so they can find other people through that event! !
I was thinking that too…
It’s like you need to add a disclaimer to your “ service/ agreement contract…” this is a business, I am not your new BFF.
He factored hanging out with you into his decision to move there. 😳😂
I think you are right about that, which was wrong and foolish. You don’t make a major decision like that mainly based on one person you assume will be in your life when you move.
Building community is essential for a successful move abroad. It requires people putting themselves out there. Exploring new hobbies, meeting locals and more.
Keep doing what you're doing. I'm not sure how they would move abroad and automatically think you're their best friend. Gotta know yourself before you move abroad and have a plan like you said Cartess. You're a busy man don't you take it personal. BTW Happy Fathers Day early. Us Fathers gotta stick together lol
Suggestion: Hold an in-person meet up at a nice restaurant in Merida. Find a way to monetize it.
Hold two events. One for solo travelers, another for couples/families.
I'm an introvert 😂😂😂
@@MoveAbroadandThrivelike you, I am an introvert that has to be extroverted at times.
This person actually has a great idea. Here's why:
There is a definite end time. Make the invitation from 6:00 to 7:30 or 8:00 to meet for dinner or snacks and beers, whatever. But make a time limit on it. Then you know it's going to end. You can get through an hour and a half 2 hours. As I said, I'm the same as you. I would do this because it has an end time.
Great idea!
@@MoveAbroadandThrive😂😂😂
There are actually many groups in Merida that do the same thing already. Various age groups and interests. I understand being fearful moving to a new place and not knowing anyone, especially at a certain age. Regardless, some work needs to be done on your part to find where you fit in. Many people don’t want to do the work !
Sometimes it pays to be "Family'..lol😂, Uncle Cartess, goes to show that your Loved and Needed...these folks don't need any further explanation on WHY or WHAT YOU DO with your GROWN MAN self!
PERIODT!
😂😂😂
I’m impressed you did the video without getting the mic wet. The best thing for solo residents to do is sign up for local language classes right away. I met most of my friend group through Spanish classes.
These people that become dependent on you and your services you could ask them if they would be interested in meeting the people that have used your services. You could charge them a LITTLE FEE for a meet and greet that you could have once every 2 weeks. I'm sure you keep in a database.
Cartess another guy with videos and services for Merida said the same thing. He stated in his video that he's not looking to be your friend and hang out. Your videos are awesome and very informative. Stay who you are and do what you been doing. I understand the process.
You have a new thing here: Pool Talk! I feel for you, people shouldn't put you in a position where you feel the need to defend yourself. You are good with boundaries but others, not so much.
Hey Cartess your magnetic personality just keep drawing people in...🤣 Maybe in your consultation you can prove people and find out some of their interests. So when they come to visit you can provide them with a list of activities they can do as single people or family members. Perhaps if you know or know of other expats having up coming events around the time your clients may be visiting so that they can make friends and have a way to interact with others and allows them to have more resources and people to help them to get acramated to the new way of life.
Great tips. Thanks for sharing.
@@MoveAbroadandThrive
Your most welcome 😊
There are Facebook groups in Merida that can help provide a social life/ events that a person would be interested in. Cartess is busy enough as it is with his business, five kids and his Marriage. If I decided to move to Merida I would pay him for his services but would not move unless I understood it was my responsibility to make a life for myself there. I’m also introverted so a little social interaction here and there, Spanish and exercise classes etc and I would be good to go.
I understand that there are Facebook groups but not everyone is on social media. You may have an older person, someone with other issues which makes it a little more difficult in being social. Cartess seemed to like and embrace the idea. So that's all that matters. He made the video asking his RUclips family to offer suggestions, because he does care and want people to feel welcome and good about choosing his services and about the move which is a big move. I just offered a suggestion which could be of use to him. Cartess is free to operate in any manner he deems best for him and his family. The suggestions I made for him to offer in his package is so that the clients would have to feel so or solely dependent on him. This will provide them with other resources and ways to help them adjust to a new life with people whom speak English while learning Spanish. It's a big move, it's very frightening for most people and they just develop an attachment with Cartess because they get to know him through videos, and he's the first person they see when they arrive in a new place. That's all I was saying.
I'm an introvert, and I'm exactly the same way. I understand this completely. You don't owe people any time you don't want to give them. I enjoy your videos.
Man, you mean we can't hang out bro? 😂. I feel you though. You should have told him about the black expat group in Merida. They meet up every week. My wife and I left Mexico due to the boredom and cultural differences. There are mainly 3 things to do in Mexico, go see the pyramids, swim in a cenote, and zip line. Don't get me wrong there's snorkeling and jet skis plus other water activities but the prices are so expensive for those activities, it's not feasible. For us, Mexico was great but not for a lifetime, just for a short-term. We met a lot of friendly people, mostly Mexicans as we noticed a lot of the black people didn't speak to each other that much. Not all but most. We've picked up that bad habit from the US I think.
Mexico is great but my advice is to test the waters for a few months before deciding to move down there for life. It's different !!!
Hello Brother! I pray you Kim and the girls are well.. I’m getting excited about my move to Mérida in August from Upstate New York! You provide a Business with a array of unique service built in that you do to add that extra layer of support to people relocating to Merida! You don’t have to do it after you have accomplished finding and assuring the person has found and moved into their housing.. so people need to understand you are a professional that will help them which is not to be taken as a friendship! They need to respect your boundaries and move on with their lives so you can move on and service the next person that needs your services… I’m just saying ❤🙏🏽
Being an introvert myself I totally understand what you are saying. I was diagnosed in College and it helped explain a lot of feelings I had towards people and why it's so easy for me to leave any relationship. People think because you are a great conversationalist your outgoing. I'm retired and my guess is I spend 90+ percent of my time at home and my wife will tell anyone to only people who can get me out to house at will are my grandchildren.
You might have to add a disclaimer about this.
For sure :)
🔥I agree with @oesso on this!!!
You’re probably an introvert. Like I am, I’m happier at home. I love my family but I love being in the comfort of my home. 😊
Loneliness is a powerful emotion.
Yes it can be for sure
Thank you for addressing this. I'm about to start an online business helping people directly and this is a concern for me. FYI...I've been looking at Belize as a possible landing pad since they speak English mainly, but I only see information about the islands and not the mainland. In case you check it out before I make it down there it would make a good first impression video.
Totally get this! It’s why I never chose to position myself as an expert in this space.
Our time is valuable and should be respected and compensation is reflected in that.
You can’t get on a phone call with me for less than four figures because I’ve invested time and money and effort in my expertise.
You are doing a great job Cartess.
Dealing with people is more than a notion.
This is typical behavior in most expat communities. People arrive looking to latch on to anyone they can find. I opened a wellness business in Merida and it attracted so many people who were looking for companionship. But being a business owner makes it hard to just be available for people looking for friends to hang.
The expat lifestyle isn't the same for everyone. Most of us are working or raising families. Some ppl have way more free time and some don't respect your time.
Unfortunately there are a lot of needy and clingy folks arriving. They have social groups for that. But it seems like they usually don't want to hang with other retired or available expats. They want to hang out with the busy folks.
Great points. Thanks. And busy people are always more fun.
I feel your pain. When you’re ADHD, people don’t get it. I suffer from anxiety, and like to be alone. I don’t like the phone either. I’m service oriented, if you need assistance with something, I got ya. This is exactly why I don’t like social media because there are so many different personalities, thinking they have the right to say any old thing. Just do you, and keep it pushin…
thanks for watching :)
I'm an introvert as well and most of the time, people misunderstand the way we move. I have learned to let people live with that hang up because it's theirs and not mine. Keep doing you and the wonderful work you do.
@MoveAbroadandThrive, PLEASE DO NOT worry or stress about some ADULT being "mad" at you. YOU are NOT THEIR KEEPER.
KEEP doing what you're doing. We love you & what you're doing!❤
Keep up the great work!!
Chile ur gonna have to add social group referrals for these people because they seem to think this is included(you) in the relocation package😂
Ahh bro I thought we would gonna go clubbing 😂😂😂
😂😂😂
Suggestions.
Charge for group meets.
charge per hour for phone or in person conferences.
Include gas, food and drinks, and collect ahead of time.
You do not have to be involved but
keep the visitors busy with each other.
Have frozen water bottles for body, bed, chair, car and pets.
Breaking hearts in Merida, Mr. Ross....
Just add pretend friendship in your services list. Time in the Ross pool hourly charge. Come on now that retirement fund would grow fast.
"pretend friendship"! 😭 I screamed when I saw your comment!!! 🤣
😂
Speak your truth Cartess! I was blessed by your company for sure. Even more appreciative now! LIVE YOUR LIFE
People are weird 😂
This part such a must needed message 👌🏽🙏🏽🤣 especially here. I feel the same way enjoy my own company the most and my family. Personal Boundaries is a must keeps balance & order.
This is what happens when you have a great personality. Why don't you arrange a meet and greet for your clients and the clients of your clients? Help build the community.
I just found your channel and it is very informative. I am sorry that man treated you as he did. Like a duck, water off the back and keep on keeping on. The ridiculousness of some people especially when you went out of your way to meet up with him. 😂😂 You have a customer when I make my trip that way to investigate and you have a new subscriber. Thank you, sir.
Can't please Everyone 😊SMH!!!!
I never thought about you experiencing this problem, but it makes sense!
People think you’re friends before you even meet.
I’m experiencing a similar type of thing living in Chapala. I’m a married woman but was looking to meet other women for friendships.
It’s a small community, and it’s really easy to meet people. That I’m happy for, because it was not easy to meet people in Florida.
But, then you also run into that awkward thing of meeting people and they ask you to meet for lunch, and 10 minutes later you’re looking for the door, but also trying to not be rude.
One woman was super rude to the wait staff. Another spent the entire lunch talking about herself and her divorce. I swear she left not knowing a thing about me. Then there’s the awkward breaking it off phase.
It feels like dating!!! I hate it!!!😂😂 I’m really more of a loner, and I enjoy being home with my husband and pets.
I may have over thought the “making friends” stuff, and probably should have eased into it slower.
Hi Cartess. I tried to join your academy and can’t find it. The message says website unavailable. However you & TiaNikki are my folks. Appreciate you both sooo much! 💪🏾❤
Hmmmm... Try this link: www.moveabroadandthrive.com/vip/
I'm somewhat of a introvert, social anxiety, I like people-at times, but I like being alone, and not having to engage.
Great job putting everything in perspective.
So true. Some people don't get it. Great video.
I'll be calling soon to relax at the beach and drink a beer
@@MoveAbroadandThrive As always, I look forward to it
Do we do that with our Real Estate agent in the States???? Noooooo! So, don’t expect it when you move abroad.
It's ABSURD!
Boundary I stated to you prior; no in person consultation over the phone only to avoid this. I’ll see you in person if you need further assistance.
It's funny, I was over your cousin's house last week and told them that I hadn't met you yet. Lol I was like he's booked and busy. I totally understand though.
You should do monthly meetups and charge an entry fee. That's a side hustle by itself!
Family means everything is enjoy them and try not to allow people to through you off your mission which they will try to do. The man said that he found a place and he didn’t need your services so that’s the end of it for him. People are so inconsiderate of people time this is a business and you are doing it well. So keep up the good work. Peace to you and your family, hope to meet you and Tia soon!
Sounds like you went above and beyond delivering outstanding customer service.
That's that military in you brother they don't understand. I have been watching since the T-shirt days when I first got started I listened to u and it's beautiful 2 see u live life and share it with the world of RUclips.
You may have to let people know upfront that your involvement (while warm, friendly & helpful) is a *service* and they should not expect friendship thereafter. 😂
Not your problem Cartess. I suspect folks get there and once things settle down they get lonely. Maybe you can encourage your clients to meet up once a month or so at a restaurant where they can meet one another and make connections if they choose to. You don't have to attend. God Bless!
Hi Cartess. Maybe you could organize mixers for people to connect. You don't have to attend, but you could organize them for a fee. Have someone else host it. Someone who is extraverted. I know it's not your responsibility. Just a thought. Enjoy your content😊
Hey fam. I am back watching this again. This was a good video. I was looking into Merida 1 for safety and proximity to the US. But you listed some other places that I wanted to jot down and look into. Cant wait to see where you guys go next. Best Wishes
Heat wave is on here in US and I cannot imagine how y'all are coping in Merida!😝🥵🥵😵
GREAT VIDEO CARTESS!!! 💯🇲🇽😊
So what I am hearing is that when I move to Mérida, we are not going to be best friends. LOL😂😂😂
Everybody thinks they know you and are a member of your team because of the social nature of the videos. But its a business. Like your cloent said ‘I know you (because of your videos), but you dont know me’. True.
People, keep in mind, its your dream/fantasy but its Roberts business and respect him & his time as a businessman.
Viva Mexico. 🇲🇽
Sounds like maybe an off boarding process could be put in place to wean people off your presence smhlol. Like having them talk to you less and less at the end and only correspond with admin. Or at least a gatekeeper between you and the clients where they can’t have direct contact. It seems like the type of person who would choose to travel alone/move abroad alone would be more susceptible to being clingy when they meet a friendly person. So maybe this is one of those work hazard type situations. So interesting! Wishing you the best Cartess!!!
This is a very big problem in our society, people don’t understand boundaries. You have a relocation business, not a hand holding business, if they need emotional support add another thousand dollars, for one week only. You must be clear on your do”s and don’t.
did you used to have a t shirt channel ? I think I used to watch your content glad to see you doing good 👍🏾 came along way from the heat press machine 💪🏽
You are not their "daddy" that's the problem people always feel entitled when they need to grow the hell up and be truly independent. IJS
I must got ADD to the 10th power also lmbooooooo. I move every year. i like to see different things
I wish I could move every years. Sounds like an amazing life!
I feel you
:)
What??? 3 months later...out of nowhere. Bro could have reached out to him! He's an adult!
Keep being you!
Belize , only country in Central( ?) America where English is primary language… another expat location
Have a client mixer once a month. Have it at a local bar/restaurant. You don’t have to be there.
I feel you bro. Healthy boundaries. Folks will wreck ya & then leave. 😂
I'm only amateur if that... I'd just have them come to you instead of you going to them and tell them you'd rather talk over the phone or go by email. What is your service? Do you find places for them to rent? I wouldn't let others control your happiness. Tell them you don't have time and just offer the minimum amount of time for your business... just my amateur thought. Looks like you have a good retirement business if you can taper back. Hope I helped. You have a magnetic personality and very smart and capable... a tour de force!
I don't usually meet ... This was one of those rare occurrences; and a reminder on why i don't typically do it
I agree.
we paid for full service $$$$ and this man gave me and my family of 7 more then we paid for I try to check in every once in a while and he does the same , I'm 33 years old raising my children by myself with my wife I don't even expect to hear from him yet he shoots me a text asking how things are going and if I may need anything he is a great guy stop acting like he owes you the world and grow up seriously people are so entitled it's scary
Bruh! No explanations necessary! 😘
Sometimes people form attachments to people that help them,just because they are not use to the VIP treatment. And they want it to last forever, not realizing that this was a business transaction and you are being the consummate professional that’s it. People come back to reality, let’s not get it twisted. The man has a life now go create yours.
It's unfortunate that you have to explain this. BUT, you seem so friendly in your videos! But, you do get to pick your friends and extended family. It's hard to imagine that you are a shy introvert. Don't lose sleep over. We will be ok! 😊
English is spoken in Belize. Do not need residency, can renew tourist visa indefinitely. Very inexpensive.
That sounds enticing
But, too far and difficult to DRIVE TO BELIZE with pets 😢
Don't you have to pay $100/ month- per person- to stay there, after the first 30 days?
I haven't looked it up in a while, but I was watching a RUclipsr a few years ago and the whole family moved to Belize and I believe that the husband/father was saying that they had to pay $100 a month each.
And I think it said that when I looked up Belize early last year.
@@RescueAlwaysOfficial you might be correct. Most countries require a very large amount up front, no refunds. This is a great option for those on a budget, or those who might want to leave suddenly without losing their money 😁