I have this problem where I tell my partner its okay for them to do something but then subconciously I know im not really okay with it. So then I start an argument over it.
Being honest with ourselves about our own behavior can be half the battle. Just look at how honest you are in your comment. You're able to admit that you agree to things you really don't agree with. The real question is why? Being able to delve deeper into our thought and reaction processes can hopefully reveal reasons why we say yes when we really want to say no. Does it stem from a fear of saying no? Is our response steeped in control? Why do we choose an argument over honesty? So cool, you've been able to admit a habit that maybe you're finally able to quit. Keep striving for more open communication and vulnerability.
I kind of have the same problem but it is with a person not and act. We met a person that my wife really Likes to be with but I am not a big fan of this person. What do I say when she wants to visit this person that makes her so happy. Should I just deal with that person because it makes my wife happy?
@@chad7064 How about this?...My bf said over a year ago that he wanted an open relationship but only for me. He wanted me to be with other guys and to also hear about the experience. I told him then that i wouldn't be able to reciprocate that back to him and he agreed to this and said hes not interested in sleeping with other women. But NOW he wants to be able to "talk" to other girls sexually online and share porn with them. And he just went and did so and then told me about it after the fact and was pissed off that i got pissed off. There was zero discussion about whether i would be ok with it or not before he did it. And then he said i was beinf selfish and unfair that im the only one allowed to have fun and if this was how i was going to react then he just won't tell me about it. To which i said ok so behind the back is cool...noted. Then he says if im going to be like this then we just aren't going to work bc my "double standard is laughable." Hes not wrong...i absolutely have a double standard...but he knew that from the jump and now he just expects me to get completely on board just like that or jump ship entirely. He even wanted to share the convo with the other girl with me in hopes it would turn me on. It doesn't. And he wants it to get to the point that he can "introduce me to her" and we can all talk but said that cant happen bc i would be jealous and mean to her. Wtf? I want to make him happy and i don't like being selfish about it but i just don't know if i can get there.
I know my partner for 13 years. So far our relationship is great. And yes. Its open. We both are very se*ual. Both love to travel. We are in the distance sometimes due to our careers. I trust him 100%. We dont really have the need to be with others at all but we love adventure and that option is available whenever we want to have fun. We are happy this way enjoying our feelings. We want each other to be happy and enjoy life. He is also my best friend and my family apart from partner and lover. We also set rules with the other people. "No emotional attachment or secondary relationships." And "Always honesty". So basically, we can have fuckfriends that we can meet individually or together whenever we want fun. So far, it works because we only look for people who only want sex. Depends on your partner as well. If you date a jerk or a guy with a Peter Pan mentality not ready to commit, you shouldn't have expectations indeed but if your love is solid it can last. Like our relationship. 13 years and counting. So it depends. For some people it works for others it doesn't work. You just need to love, trust, know your partner very well and do what makes you grow and be happy. Lots of love everyone ❤️
Me and my wife are new to this and having so much fun! I love seeing a side of her I didn't know she could comfortably show. We met in 97' got married and are best friends. That's what makes this so exhilarating! Having conversations together you never dreamed you'd have is so hot! Thanks for the advice and we'll see yall at your Houston club very soon.
They have a club in Houston? Just stumbled across this video and very glad I did. I'll have to check out their other videos :) What's the name of their club? We live just south of Houston:D
They way you guys find reassurance in each other's eyes when you're speaking about sensitive topics to make sure you both agree is sooo warm 🔥 I love to see it!! ✨️ #Subscribed
I’ve been in an open relationship with someone for a while that I have recently started to fall in love with. Prior to feeling that love I hadn’t experienced these fears and insecurities. Lately I haven’t been able to sleep well due to those fears. But it has honestly helped me so much seeing this video, and it reminded me about the power of that vulnerability and being able to look inwards and communicate those feelings. Thank you for sharing this.
I’m also going through the same. Jealousy. The issue is very clearly an imbalance in my case. She takes advantage of the open relationship and I don’t; I feel like I can’t or don’t know how. I’m not even sure I want to. I’m sure the relationship is over.
Unfortunately my feeling is men are at a huge disadvantage as women control the sex so anytime we do this we are setting ourselves up for disaster. My wife and I went to a lifestyle club and had a great time but we will be sticking to each other and just be voyeurs and watch and let other people watch us as inevitably whatever I asked her to do I have to be willing to reciprocate meaning if I bring an FMF I have to be willing to do MFM basically letting some dude stick his weiner in my wife doesn't really excite me like some of the people on here, props to them but I'm not secure enough to do that and I don't think she is either. I thought about if we did, what would it mean and basically she's in charge of how, when, and how much. As a male that is not a BBC Im only in charge of how much child support and alimony I would have to pay if this thing backfired. I might as well just say hey everybody want to get busy with my wife while I pay for it LOL and maybe I'll get lucky once in a while nah I'm good
This video was perfect and very enlightening. I love the examples you used, and how y'all made things feel so normal and not make people like they are crazy. But on top of validating people you also offered solutions to other's issues in order to get passed insecurities
I have been in a poly relationship for about 6 months. I still have a lot of jealousy. I have read a lot of books, listened to pod casts. I know mine comes from low self esteem and insecurities. I just want this relationship to work. I’ve told them I will try anything and will stay until the miserable times out weigh the fun times. I just feel like I am causing more problems. I just can’t get over it.
I know what you mean. I too, felt pretty crappy when we first took our relationship from swinging to open to poly. I realized so much of what I was dealing with was the "monogamy" playbook I had carried into my open marriage. Having someone else in the picture only had negative possibilities from what I'd been taught. Even though I wanted the freedom of an open and loving marriage, I realized I had some real, raw, look at myself moments of growth that needed to happen. First and foremost I had to stop thinking of this other woman as competition. I had to stop thinking that I was "losing" something by accepting another person into our relationship. I also had to sit everyone down and have a heart to heart discussion about what everyone thought, what direction they saw the relationship going, and how everyone fit into the structure we were building. I also realized that my struggle wasn't necessarily a bad thing. So I was feeling out of sorts and unable to feel as though I could find a solid footing. That didn't automatically mean the plan was flawed, it just meant I was learning something new. With patience and tons of love I was able to take all those things that were keeping me from seeing the amazing opportunity of a poly union and transform my perspective to one where love could grow. Today, the "other" woman is one of my best friends. If I had stayed on the road of jealousy and fear I would have missed out on an amazing person in my life. If you need to talk you can always reach out to me through our Openlove101.com site. You can do this!
This is exactly what I am going through. The only difference is that we have been living the hotwife lifestyle. My husband absolutely loved it, I loved it and it brought us closer and the sex is of course amazing since starting the lifestyle. About six months ago, I mentioned he (my husband) should be able to do this and enjoy it too. I realize now I was lying to myself at that time. Fast forward to today and we've found a great couple, we've only hung out a couple of times (had sex but separately) and jealousy and insecurities rear their ugly heads. I don't know how to get past that. I've read, listened and am trying to get through it...just doesn't seem like I can!
@@meagandrost5961 making sure you check in with yourself and how you are feeling about the situation is something you'll want to continue doing. Look, sometimes we just aren't ready for the severity of the change we are making, and that's okay too. The last thing you want, is push yourself into a space of true pain. A space where you become more concerned with trying to fit within a concept, then whether or not you are enjoying the experience. Growth isn't always a "fun" place to be, as it can be filled with it's own form of pain, but if our mental health is negatively impacted, then slowing down or regrouping can be one way to regain our balance. Take the messages you are receiving emotionally and in some cases physically and pay attention. Sometimes our own view of self can be what is rearing it's head or even something deeper. Don't shy away from digging into what is happening as a result of opening up the relationship, it could be a beautiful opportunity for some self love.
@@meagandrost5961 this is late and idk what the situation is. But it sounds like your ate forcing yourself to be ok with something you are not. That doesn't sound healthy. Being open minded is one thing but its ok to not be ok with it
Your videos are sooo helpful. This has always been my go-to for open relationship advice. You two are so informative and your relationship seems beautiful. Thanks again ♥️♥️
My girlfriend and I just opened our relationship. She already has hundreds of guys at her feet waiting for a shot. She’s set something up with 2 different guys and is developing feelings for one. I have one flaky option who Ive lowered my standards pretty steeply to acquire. Has anyone else gone through this? It hurts so bad. She’s having fun and I’m struggling to even get a date
My man told me he had feeling for a person from his past and that he wanted to be involved with both I obviously am his dominant relationship not one day have I been unhappy in our relationship I was heart broken but thought about how honest he was and decided ok let me see how this goes since I said ok we are closer I feel more loved I feel actually more confident any advice for me
In my opinion just sharing your partner physically is hard enough, I just can't imagine emotionally as well. With the poor success rate of dealing with one partner I can't imagine adding another to the mix and keeping a close intimate connection. I'm interested in seeing her pleasured or that she just teases me touching someone but I would make sure it stays at physical only.
Yes, it can be a difficult hurdle, but once on the other side, the benefits are bountiful. For most of us, we aren't affected by the plethora of "emotional" connections our partner (or ourselves) have on a daily basis. People like our friends, family, co-workers, the check out person at our favorite grocery store...Why? Because we are only taught to fear connections as it relates to the direct relationship with our partner. Sure, you can both agree to a physical only boundary and do just fine, because here's the thing, an open relationship is whatever you and your partner agree on...it's part of the beauty of open relationships. Thanks for writing in.
You're very decent and very serious in your videos compared to the Club Sapphire channel, where they are lot more flirtatious and comical, but still pretty much discuss a lot of the stuff you do too :)
Hi! Since you started this open relationship, how do you make sure that neither you nor your partner meet someone that is amazing and want them to be your new primary partner. Or worse if that amazing person asks you to be monogamous with them.
First of all, we believe interacting with others is quite natural and that just because we are engaging with others doesn't mean it is at all connected with some deficit in our relationship. We don't view others from a better/worse scenario, but from a difference standpoint. I want John to meet amazing people, I want him to enjoy himself and to see the joy in learning about someone else. John would say the same for me. When we meet and engage with others, John and I always make sure to inform them of our strong connection with each other. We aren't engaging to replace, but to share in the beauty of our relationship.
The dirty little secret is a lot of men think they want it right up until the first time there wife has sex with someone else. Let's be honest men have a much harder time finding another partner, women on the other hand have no problem at all finding someone else. Jealousy is going to happen, I have heard it said before fear is the mind killer and in this situation it can destroy a relationship. My wife asked me to bring a third into the bedroom, my answer was it's a great fantasy but I'm not sure I could deal with the reality. The problem was she then did it behind my back destroying our marriage. This lifestyle is a slippery slope be very careful what you agree to because it's very hard to know how you will react when it becomes reality.
This video is super calming and helpful. Athough at the end of the day you guys have the option come back together to one another.. I met the love of my life and shes living abroad. Also covid happened and is restricting our visits, were both open headed and ive been thinking about redefining our relationship. I want the best for her. I came here to relief some of my fears. But what do i do if im not able to see my partner for more than a year?
Kissing evokes stronger emotions and kissing a lot of the times can create immature women to be attached to a sex partner. You never know who is like that and who might take things too far. I personally think that devoted relationships that are open should not be kissing anyone and dates shouldn’t be a thing. Meeting out on a night in town and getting sexually to the point to have sexual experiences is better if you don’t want to possibly lose the partner you are with If they find someone they feel is better for them. Yes there’s the thought and feelings of why hold someone back having the life they want. We as people can have great lives with many people.
First 5 sec, hes leaning towards her has to feel dom by having his hand on leg,shes laughing cashe knows shes in control and shes helping his ego always getting whatshe wants...
People seem to forget about relationships is that its not going to be sunshine and Rainbows, your going to feel miserable and go through the hard sometimes in life.. Open Relationships are big among my generation, the Millennials, seems that we don't wanna deal with bad times in relationships, my generation is weak and lack commitment.
I don't see this couple having an open relationship to cope with the notion their relationship sucks. My intuition tells me they are already in a great relationship having sex or relationships with other people.
My husband is on the smaller size , what would you reccomend for when were out with couple and he always say I'm getting something better!! Thank you! P.s when in our later 40!!
Yes, the messages from our hearts and heads can be a dilemma, this is why it's so important for you to really search both in order to come to a conclusion about which direction you want to go. Being 100% responsible for the choice you do make will help.
We have recently opened our relationship because my partner has had very little experience with women and it was very hard for me to “re-wire” my pre-conceptions about relationships. Anyway we are now finding that he is getting his experiences but i have not felt like i want to venture out but im feeling a little left out and our sex has gone down as well. Could you give some insight into whats happening?
I feel you on the left out part. My gf has had a ton of guys pursuing her since we opened up. She’s having a lot of fun. I’ve struggled to get one option who I feel I lowered my standards pretty heavily for. It just hurts feeling left out which I feel might reflect my childhood trauma as well. Have you found anything that helps your feeling of being left out?
My wife wanted an open relationship only fter I found out she had an affair now the affair is shadowed with the open relationship want of hers....I'm pissed off I have four kids ....I stopped saying shit about it she is sick on this idea bought books on it and reads them in front of me I feel like I'm being groomed by her to allow it I told her she is toxic she laughed ....wtf is wrong with women
You can't get rid of jealously. Jealous is a human trait, in which another partner will fine something to engage in jealously, which leads to conflict.. Also.. What do race falls into open relationships? Which ethnicity will most like engage in these open relationships phenomena??
I've never done any kind of "study" to see percentages of couples, but we do own swinger clubs and I can say the clubs are a beautiful slice of society. The clubs are a plethora of race, ethnicity, age, size and religious beliefs.
@@openlove101 perhaps a nationwide study, Swingers clubs just a small fraction of these kinds of studies. How about in other countries. The traditional relationship, companionships will win in the end because the bond of trust holds dear between two couple's commitment to each other, in which security and prosperity plays a major roll in relationships.
@@automotivegarcia1 not really sure what you mean by "winning," because if a couple has made the conscious choice to be in a consensually non monogamous relationship (and yes these unions are full and trusting and do have deep companionship) and the relationship model works for them then they have succeeded in forming a partnership where both can grow and prosper. To me, it's not so much about what everyone else is doing, but what works for the couple. This in my book is "winning."
@@openlove101 I heard you, however, Swingers are just a small fraction of the population of couple in Western society. If this open relationships ideals were to be put on the massive scale, they'll be a lot of live ruin and broken homes etc. I agree on if the two couple choices to make that choice in having a non monogamous relationship, however, we has humans also have a change of mind and heart, in which our traditional traits kick in regarding our commitments, trust and companionships. I have to let you know that I'm on the Conservative side of things, given that my generation has been screwed over financially and other attributes, given that I'm a person of color, which was even worse on us. Nice talking to you..
My girl started telling me she thinks she's sexual awhile back. I ended up bringing up having an open relationship She said I could but she didn't need to. The next day she doing research and getting excited about it. By this My girl admitted she's not attracted to me anymore basically because of man things I don't do around the house for instance. First I thought she was telling the truth about being asexual. But not It feels like I have to do certain chores to earn her desire for me. I would have never brought up having an open relationship had I known how she really felt. Do we need to work on us before having an open relationship? Could an open relationship help her feel attracted to me again?
Thanks for the question. Our answer would be not to introduce consensual non monogamy if the relationship is already struggling. Please take the time to work out any issues your relationship might be having before introducing consensual non monogamy. It has been our experience that couples who invite a new relationship model into a relationship already struggling will only end up amplifying issues.
No judgement. I find it interesting that at the beginning of the interview, the husband was touching his wife's hand / lap. And as the interview progressed, they stopped touching. It became like a relationship of business partners or even employee / employer. Not husband and wife. And it was only near the end of the interview, that the husband touched his wife again. It is a psychological fact, that when you separate sex and love, that they are just that. Are you trying to convince viewers that your lifestyle is OK or yourselves?
@@perdedor3571 Active listening? Body language can provide significant information about the subconscious mind. The couple who made the YT video are just trying to convince themselves by convincing others that swinging is ok. And that's fine if you feel you are looking for permission and acceptance from society for the lifestyle you are living.
@@perdedor3571 If you or anybody else doesn't have interest and / or care about my comments. Then why are you posting comments about my so called narative? Seems rather contradictive on your part don't you think? Maybe you should consider getting some professional counseling and deal with your hatred that you so freely display on this platform anyway. Good luck to you.
![[#2024MAMA] BIGBANG (빅뱅) - 뱅뱅뱅 (BANG BANG BANG) + FANTASTIC BABY | Mnet 241123 방송](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/EQsYfiPR9uM/mqdefault.jpg)
I have this problem where I tell my partner its okay for them to do something but then subconciously I know im not really okay with it. So then I start an argument over it.
Being honest with ourselves about our own behavior can be half the battle. Just look at how honest you are in your comment. You're able to admit that you agree to things you really don't agree with. The real question is why? Being able to delve deeper into our thought and reaction processes can hopefully reveal reasons why we say yes when we really want to say no. Does it stem from a fear of saying no? Is our response steeped in control? Why do we choose an argument over honesty? So cool, you've been able to admit a habit that maybe you're finally able to quit. Keep striving for more open communication and vulnerability.
I have the same problem.
I kind of have the same problem but it is with a person not and act. We met a person that my wife really Likes to be with but I am not a big fan of this person. What do I say when she wants to visit this person that makes her so happy. Should I just deal with that person because it makes my wife happy?
@@jeffroberdo3492 you should always voice your concerns , without communication nothing will be solved. Tell her why you don’t care for that person .
@@chad7064 How about this?...My bf said over a year ago that he wanted an open relationship but only for me. He wanted me to be with other guys and to also hear about the experience. I told him then that i wouldn't be able to reciprocate that back to him and he agreed to this and said hes not interested in sleeping with other women. But NOW he wants to be able to "talk" to other girls sexually online and share porn with them. And he just went and did so and then told me about it after the fact and was pissed off that i got pissed off. There was zero discussion about whether i would be ok with it or not before he did it. And then he said i was beinf selfish and unfair that im the only one allowed to have fun and if this was how i was going to react then he just won't tell me about it. To which i said ok so behind the back is cool...noted. Then he says if im going to be like this then we just aren't going to work bc my "double standard is laughable." Hes not wrong...i absolutely have a double standard...but he knew that from the jump and now he just expects me to get completely on board just like that or jump ship entirely. He even wanted to share the convo with the other girl with me in hopes it would turn me on. It doesn't. And he wants it to get to the point that he can "introduce me to her" and we can all talk but said that cant happen bc i would be jealous and mean to her. Wtf? I want to make him happy and i don't like being selfish about it but i just don't know if i can get there.
I know my partner for 13 years.
So far our relationship is great.
And yes. Its open.
We both are very se*ual. Both love to travel. We are in the distance sometimes due to our careers.
I trust him 100%.
We dont really have the need to be with others at all but we love adventure and that option is available whenever we want to have fun.
We are happy this way enjoying our feelings. We want each other to be happy and enjoy life.
He is also my best friend and my family apart from partner and lover.
We also set rules with the other people.
"No emotional attachment or secondary relationships."
And "Always honesty".
So basically, we can have fuckfriends that we can meet individually or together whenever we want fun.
So far, it works because we only look for people who only want sex.
Depends on your partner as well. If you date a jerk or a guy with a Peter Pan mentality not ready to commit, you shouldn't have expectations indeed but if your love is solid it can last. Like our relationship.
13 years and counting.
So it depends.
For some people it works for others it doesn't work.
You just need to love, trust, know your partner very well and do what makes you grow and be happy.
Lots of love everyone ❤️
I love the two of you have worked out boundaries within the relationship that work for both of you.
Me and my wife are new to this and having so much fun! I love seeing a side of her I didn't know she could comfortably show. We met in 97' got married and are best friends. That's what makes this so exhilarating! Having conversations together you never dreamed you'd have is so hot! Thanks for the advice and we'll see yall at your Houston club very soon.
They have a club in Houston? Just stumbled across this video and very glad I did. I'll have to check out their other videos :) What's the name of their club? We live just south of Houston:D
Good to know I’m not alone
God I’m so happy I found y’all this video explains exactly the situation I am experiencing right now
They way you guys find reassurance in each other's eyes when you're speaking about sensitive topics to make sure you both agree is sooo warm 🔥 I love to see it!! ✨️ #Subscribed
I’ve been in an open relationship with someone for a while that I have recently started to fall in love with. Prior to feeling that love I hadn’t experienced these fears and insecurities. Lately I haven’t been able to sleep well due to those fears. But it has honestly helped me so much seeing this video, and it reminded me about the power of that vulnerability and being able to look inwards and communicate those feelings. Thank you for sharing this.
Thank you for sharing your experience! ❤️
im currently going through jealousy also, and it has been a huge issue to the point were we may be separating. thanks for your videos.
Am going through the same what happened with you and how you dealt with it
I’m also going through the same. Jealousy. The issue is very clearly an imbalance in my case. She takes advantage of the open relationship and I don’t; I feel like I can’t or don’t know how. I’m not even sure I want to. I’m sure the relationship is over.
Most open relationship do fail. Why not stick to swinging?
Unfortunately my feeling is men are at a huge disadvantage as women control the sex so anytime we do this we are setting ourselves up for disaster.
My wife and I went to a lifestyle club and had a great time but we will be sticking to each other and just be voyeurs and watch and let other people watch us as inevitably whatever I asked her to do I have to be willing to reciprocate meaning if I bring an FMF I have to be willing to do MFM basically letting some dude stick his weiner in my wife doesn't really excite me like some of the people on here, props to them but I'm not secure enough to do that and I don't think she is either. I thought about if we did, what would it mean and basically she's in charge of how, when, and how much. As a male that is not a BBC Im only in charge of how much child support and alimony I would have to pay if this thing backfired. I might as well just say hey everybody want to get busy with my wife while I pay for it LOL and maybe I'll get lucky once in a while nah I'm good
This video was perfect and very enlightening. I love the examples you used, and how y'all made things feel so normal and not make people like they are crazy. But on top of validating people you also offered solutions to other's issues in order to get passed insecurities
Thank you very much for the good advice. I have been struggling with that question for a couple of days and you really gave me more perspective
Glad we could help.
This was so incredibly helpful for me. Thank you. 💗
Girl dump him
@@DivineLoveMachineGun lmao I did 😅
I have been in a poly relationship for about 6 months. I still have a lot of jealousy. I have read a lot of books, listened to pod casts. I know mine comes from low self esteem and insecurities. I just want this relationship to work. I’ve told them I will try anything and will stay until the miserable times out weigh the fun times. I just feel like I am causing more problems. I just can’t get over it.
I know what you mean. I too, felt pretty crappy when we first took our relationship from swinging to open to poly. I realized so much of what I was dealing with was the "monogamy" playbook I had carried into my open marriage. Having someone else in the picture only had negative possibilities from what I'd been taught. Even though I wanted the freedom of an open and loving marriage, I realized I had some real, raw, look at myself moments of growth that needed to happen. First and foremost I had to stop thinking of this other woman as competition. I had to stop thinking that I was "losing" something by accepting another person into our relationship. I also had to sit everyone down and have a heart to heart discussion about what everyone thought, what direction they saw the relationship going, and how everyone fit into the structure we were building. I also realized that my struggle wasn't necessarily a bad thing. So I was feeling out of sorts and unable to feel as though I could find a solid footing. That didn't automatically mean the plan was flawed, it just meant I was learning something new. With patience and tons of love I was able to take all those things that were keeping me from seeing the amazing opportunity of a poly union and transform my perspective to one where love could grow. Today, the "other" woman is one of my best friends. If I had stayed on the road of jealousy and fear I would have missed out on an amazing person in my life. If you need to talk you can always reach out to me through our Openlove101.com site. You can do this!
This is exactly what I am going through. The only difference is that we have been living the hotwife lifestyle. My husband absolutely loved it, I loved it and it brought us closer and the sex is of course amazing since starting the lifestyle. About six months ago, I mentioned he (my husband) should be able to do this and enjoy it too. I realize now I was lying to myself at that time.
Fast forward to today and we've found a great couple, we've only hung out a couple of times (had sex but separately) and jealousy and insecurities rear their ugly heads. I don't know how to get past that. I've read, listened and am trying to get through it...just doesn't seem like I can!
@@meagandrost5961 making sure you check in with yourself and how you are feeling about the situation is something you'll want to continue doing. Look, sometimes we just aren't ready for the severity of the change we are making, and that's okay too. The last thing you want, is push yourself into a space of true pain. A space where you become more concerned with trying to fit within a concept, then whether or not you are enjoying the experience. Growth isn't always a "fun" place to be, as it can be filled with it's own form of pain, but if our mental health is negatively impacted, then slowing down or regrouping can be one way to regain our balance. Take the messages you are receiving emotionally and in some cases physically and pay attention. Sometimes our own view of self can be what is rearing it's head or even something deeper. Don't shy away from digging into what is happening as a result of opening up the relationship, it could be a beautiful opportunity for some self love.
After being hurt so much I learned to put my feelings aside except for the gratification..
@@meagandrost5961 this is late and idk what the situation is. But it sounds like your ate forcing yourself to be ok with something you are not. That doesn't sound healthy. Being open minded is one thing but its ok to not be ok with it
How to be prepare for those feelings when you haven't experienced?
Your videos are sooo helpful. This has always been my go-to for open relationship advice. You two are so informative and your relationship seems beautiful. Thanks again ♥️♥️
Our pleasure!
Can we talk on whatsapp babes??
18762167563 am Peter from Jamaica west Indies!!
My girlfriend and I just opened our relationship. She already has hundreds of guys at her feet waiting for a shot. She’s set something up with 2 different guys and is developing feelings for one. I have one flaky option who Ive lowered my standards pretty steeply to acquire. Has anyone else gone through this? It hurts so bad. She’s having fun and I’m struggling to even get a date
Where you the one to bring up an open relationship?
Get your girlfriend to bring you women, it truly works..
Yeah..... She's a 304. Better to toss that one over the side and lesson learned. She wants strange and using you for security.
Set your boundaries. If that makes you uncomfortable then speak up. If she has a problem with it then leave. If you havent already. But who am i
She is gorgeous…!
Great video. Thank you both. ❤
My man told me he had feeling for a person from his past and that he wanted to be involved with both I obviously am his dominant relationship not one day have I been unhappy in our relationship I was heart broken but thought about how honest he was and decided ok let me see how this goes since I said ok we are closer I feel more loved I feel actually more confident any advice for me
Not sure what advice you need as it appears you are feeling nothing but good in your decision.
i just got into an open relationship and im kinda scared-
Well, keep reading and watching Openlove101, the content should help you through the process.
In my opinion just sharing your partner physically is hard enough, I just can't imagine emotionally as well. With the poor success rate of dealing with one partner I can't imagine adding another to the mix and keeping a close intimate connection. I'm interested in seeing her pleasured or that she just teases me touching someone but I would make sure it stays at physical only.
Yes, it can be a difficult hurdle, but once on the other side, the benefits are bountiful. For most of us, we aren't affected by the plethora of "emotional" connections our partner (or ourselves) have on a daily basis. People like our friends, family, co-workers, the check out person at our favorite grocery store...Why? Because we are only taught to fear connections as it relates to the direct relationship with our partner. Sure, you can both agree to a physical only boundary and do just fine, because here's the thing, an open relationship is whatever you and your partner agree on...it's part of the beauty of open relationships. Thanks for writing in.
When Jackie's book becomes a movie -- who should play John & Jackie? My vote is Demi Moore and Bruce Willis.
You're very decent and very serious in your videos compared to the Club Sapphire channel, where they are lot more flirtatious and comical, but still pretty much discuss a lot of the stuff you do too :)
Thanks!
Thank you very much! ❤️
Hi! Since you started this open relationship, how do you make sure that neither you nor your partner meet someone that is amazing and want them to be your new primary partner. Or worse if that amazing person asks you to be monogamous with them.
First of all, we believe interacting with others is quite natural and that just because we are engaging with others doesn't mean it is at all connected with some deficit in our relationship. We don't view others from a better/worse scenario, but from a difference standpoint. I want John to meet amazing people, I want him to enjoy himself and to see the joy in learning about someone else. John would say the same for me. When we meet and engage with others, John and I always make sure to inform them of our strong connection with each other. We aren't engaging to replace, but to share in the beauty of our relationship.
Open relationship damaged my marriage
Us men always have fantasies about all the women we can get until we see all available men waiting for women.
The dirty little secret is a lot of men think they want it right up until the first time there wife has sex with someone else. Let's be honest men have a much harder time finding another partner, women on the other hand have no problem at all finding someone else. Jealousy is going to happen, I have heard it said before fear is the mind killer and in this situation it can destroy a relationship. My wife asked me to bring a third into the bedroom, my answer was it's a great fantasy but I'm not sure I could deal with the reality. The problem was she then did it behind my back destroying our marriage. This lifestyle is a slippery slope be very careful what you agree to because it's very hard to know how you will react when it becomes reality.
“We experience”…. Well what if only one person is successful at finding additional mates?
Loved this
This video is super calming and helpful. Athough at the end of the day you guys have the option come back together to one another..
I met the love of my life and shes living abroad. Also covid happened and is restricting our visits, were both open headed and ive been thinking about redefining our relationship. I want the best for her. I came here to relief some of my fears. But what do i do if im not able to see my partner for more than a year?
Kissing evokes stronger emotions and kissing a lot of the times can create immature women to be attached to a sex partner. You never know who is like that and who might take things too far. I personally think that devoted relationships that are open should not be kissing anyone and dates shouldn’t be a thing. Meeting out on a night in town and getting sexually to the point to have sexual experiences is better if you don’t want to possibly lose the partner you are with If they find someone they feel is better for them. Yes there’s the thought and feelings of why hold someone back having the life they want. We as people can have great lives with many people.
I'm new to this and if try with pass couples and lost them, how do I get passed this? We love each other very much and want to try this together
First 5 sec, hes leaning towards her has to feel dom by having his hand on leg,shes laughing cashe knows shes in control and shes helping his ego always getting whatshe wants...
People seem to forget about relationships is that its not going to be sunshine and Rainbows, your going to feel miserable and go through the hard sometimes in life.. Open Relationships are big among my generation, the Millennials, seems that we don't wanna deal with bad times in relationships, my generation is weak and lack commitment.
I don't see this couple having an open relationship to cope with the notion their relationship sucks. My intuition tells me they are already in a great relationship having sex or relationships with other people.
What’s better than sex? New sex!
My husband is on the smaller size , what would you reccomend for when were out with couple and he always say I'm getting something better!! Thank you! P.s when in our later 40!!
I Am Bigger Cheat On Him
My heads say stop you cant do this. My heart say, you can do this everyone have different journey. So? What should i do?
Yes, the messages from our hearts and heads can be a dilemma, this is why it's so important for you to really search both in order to come to a conclusion about which direction you want to go. Being 100% responsible for the choice you do make will help.
@@openlove101 thanks for reply, its mean a lot ❤️
In my limited experience, swinging is by and large a matriarchy.
Perhaps you are in a good path
We have recently opened our relationship because my partner has had very little experience with women and it was very hard for me to “re-wire” my pre-conceptions about relationships. Anyway we are now finding that he is getting his experiences but i have not felt like i want to venture out but im feeling a little left out and our sex has gone down as well. Could you give some insight into whats happening?
I feel you on the left out part. My gf has had a ton of guys pursuing her since we opened up. She’s having a lot of fun. I’ve struggled to get one option who I feel I lowered my standards pretty heavily for. It just hurts feeling left out which I feel might reflect my childhood trauma as well. Have you found anything that helps your feeling of being left out?
I Will Play With You To Make Him Jealous
How often do you Jackie hook up with out your partner
You are so beautiful:)
My wife wanted an open relationship only fter I found out she had an affair now the affair is shadowed with the open relationship want of hers....I'm pissed off I have four kids ....I stopped saying shit about it she is sick on this idea bought books on it and reads them in front of me I feel like I'm being groomed by her to allow it I told her she is toxic she laughed ....wtf is wrong with women
You can't get rid of jealously. Jealous is a human trait, in which another partner will fine something to engage in jealously, which leads to conflict.. Also.. What do race falls into open relationships? Which ethnicity will most like engage in these open relationships phenomena??
I've never done any kind of "study" to see percentages of couples, but we do own swinger clubs and I can say the clubs are a beautiful slice of society. The clubs are a plethora of race, ethnicity, age, size and religious beliefs.
@@openlove101 perhaps a nationwide study, Swingers clubs just a small fraction of these kinds of studies. How about in other countries. The traditional relationship, companionships will win in the end because the bond of trust holds dear between two couple's commitment to each other, in which security and prosperity plays a major roll in relationships.
@@automotivegarcia1 not really sure what you mean by "winning," because if a couple has made the conscious choice to be in a consensually non monogamous relationship (and yes these unions are full and trusting and do have deep companionship) and the relationship model works for them then they have succeeded in forming a partnership where both can grow and prosper. To me, it's not so much about what everyone else is doing, but what works for the couple. This in my book is "winning."
@@openlove101 I heard you, however, Swingers are just a small fraction of the population of couple in Western society. If this open relationships ideals were to be put on the massive scale, they'll be a lot of live ruin and broken homes etc. I agree on if the two couple choices to make that choice in having a non monogamous relationship, however, we has humans also have a change of mind and heart, in which our traditional traits kick in regarding our commitments, trust and companionships. I have to let you know that I'm on the Conservative side of things, given that my generation has been screwed over financially and other attributes, given that I'm a person of color, which was even worse on us. Nice talking to you..
@@automotivegarcia1 nice talking to you too.
I couldn't even watch this entire video because every time this guy says "S" in a word, he whistles. Like nails on a chalk board 😖
A LOT of masculine energy from her. Him not so much.
I am not a jealous person but i do fear of someone being jealous and it could go very wrong
First :)
My girl started telling me she thinks she's sexual awhile back. I ended up bringing up having an open relationship
She said I could but she didn't need to. The next day she doing research and getting excited about it. By this My girl admitted she's not attracted to me anymore basically because of man things I don't do around the house for instance. First I thought she was telling the truth about being asexual. But not It feels like I have to do certain chores to earn her desire for me. I would have never brought up having an open relationship had I known how she really felt. Do we need to work on us before having an open relationship? Could an open relationship help her feel attracted to me again?
Thanks for the question. Our answer would be not to introduce consensual non monogamy if the relationship is already struggling. Please take the time to work out any issues your relationship might be having before introducing consensual non monogamy. It has been our experience that couples who invite a new relationship model into a relationship already struggling will only end up amplifying issues.
Kanami itoton ni sang asawa nya .
No judgement. I find it interesting that at the beginning of the interview, the husband was touching his wife's hand / lap. And as the interview progressed, they stopped touching.
It became like a relationship of business partners or even employee / employer. Not husband and wife. And it was only near the end of the interview, that the husband touched his wife again.
It is a psychological fact, that when you separate sex and love, that they are just that. Are you trying to convince viewers that your lifestyle is OK or yourselves?
I think youre reading way too much into this. Just looks like active listening to me.
@@perdedor3571 Active listening? Body language can provide significant information about the subconscious mind. The couple who made the YT video are just trying to convince themselves by convincing others that swinging is ok. And that's fine if you feel you are looking for permission and acceptance from society for the lifestyle you are living.
@@InTheNow2020 nobody cares about your narrative, buddy.
@@perdedor3571 If you or anybody else doesn't have interest and / or care about my comments. Then why are you posting comments about my so called narative? Seems rather contradictive on your part don't you think? Maybe you should consider getting some professional counseling and deal with your hatred that you so freely display on this platform anyway. Good luck to you.
@@InTheNow2020 yeah have fun in your failing marriage.