Such an important idea--humility--I'm really happy to see you encouraging us to listen and have empathy. Those of us who are driven or compulsive want so much to do the right thing that we can get caught up in being right, forgetting that the whole point of being right is to make the world a better place for everyone. It's easy to get frustrated and put the cart before the horse by insisting that we have the answer. And thanks for the shout-out, Darryl.
man, takes some courage to talk about such issues like you do. it is not the coolest thing one can say about oneself to have this diagnosis and yet we have to talk about so we can better ourselves. i have the same diagnosis and i find your videos very insightful. thx for sharing your experiences.
Great video. I have OCPD, but in some ways, I am kind of the opposite of what you described. Ironically, I think it’s because of my OCPD. I grew up much more self righteous than I am now. I had a couple humiliating experiences (minor things that I don’t even remember) that made me realize I wasn’t always right, and maybe I should listen more. Then, I was introduced to social justice and more specifically, racism, and the ways I manifested it unconsciously. This was a crisis-type of moment for me because I am extremely morally strict with myself and I realized I had privilege that I wasn’t actively unpacking, and was, therefore, externalizing in a harmful way. I first committed to social justice when I decided someone else was right - even though I didn’t totally understand why - and that it was my time to feel bad, quiet down, and commit to learning. I’ve learned a lot since then. And as I’ve gotten older (and started to realize how much I don’t know, that others know) I’ve become a lot more humble. But I don’t consider it something to be proud about; I consider it a duty that I will never carry out well enough. (And that’s ok - and it’s reason to keep working.) I’m definitely not humble in every way though - If I consider myself more of an expert on something than someone else, it’s hard for me to hear things that I disagree with. In social justice spaces, if someone missteps, it’s hard for me to see value in investing in their learning by meaningfully engaging with them. (Part of that is from past experience, and part is personal pride) Recently I’ve come back in my circle of learning and realized that everyone starts somewhere and I’m not perfect either. I’ve realized it’s my duty to call in and talk with friends who cause harm unknowingly. This isn’t by saying “you’re wrong, learn from me” but by calmly and respectfully engaging in conversation and offering perspective they might not think about. My job isn’t to change their mind and be the reason for their change, but to plant a seed of thinking differently. (That’s what folks did for me when I first started - and lord knows I didn’t turn around in that first convo and tell them they were right.) It may sound like I’m trying to fix everyone. That’s not the case, but in social justice circles there’s a big emphasis on learning and growth, so these convos are usually socially appropriate. Anyways, like you said in your video - what’s your point in jumping in? If it’s to have people agree with you, “you catch more flies with honey.” I used to be cold and unforgiving, take it or leave it, and if you leave it it’s because you’re a lost cause. But I’m learning to consciously humble myself even in the times that I feel most self-righteous. Being self-righteous can be kept inside while your external is kind, patient, and flexible. Thanks for posting this. Your stuff always keeps me thinking in the best ways. See, I started this comment thinking this subject didn’t apply much to me. But when I think about the ways that it does, ... it does. It’s been awakening for me to realize OCPD and my rigidity is a safety mechanism that can be broken down. I get so worked up that I think I need it, and it’s a self fulfilling prophecy. I’m on my way to hit the bell!
Kera P thanks so much for leaving a comment on this video. I always enjoy the longer comments as they dig a little deeper into what's going on in people's heads. I'd say that you don't sound like the opposite of what I describe exactly, but I definitely think you and I would be a little opposite, haha. Interestingly, last night I was discussing with a friend how my OCPD manifests, and we were talking about the concept of being right. So there was a time I had the more common thought process of believing I'm right and everyone else is wrong. This is what I experience when interacting with others with OCPD in support groups. I still have this overwhelming desire to be right, but it works differently now for me. I flip flop on issues quite a bit. I'm very open to new information and listening (as you mentioned) and this means that in my attempt to be 'right' about everything I have to change my opinion if presented with factual and compelling evidence. I always do my own research once I get new information (I don't take the information at face value), but if the other person gave me correct information I'm likely to think differently on the subject. So I still want to be right, but I don't do that by digging my heels in and assuming I I know everything. If you're interested in widening your world view and seeing how their is value in everyone I'd highly suggest reading the The Happiness Hypothesis by Jonathan Haidt. It really gave me some tools to engage in a meaningful way with people I agree with and disagree with. It's also just a good book in terms of defining happiness. Thanks for watching!
I discovered your channel and just finished watching all the videos, I really appreciate your work both for the quality of the content and for the effort that as fellow OCPDer I recognize you have to put to keep this going. Looking forward to your next videos, in the meanwhile, thank you.
antaresll thank you so much for letting me know that you enjoyed the content. As you can imagine I worry about everything from how I come across, to the lighting/audio/video to whether the content is good enough. So I'm very grateful to people such as yourself for letting me know your thoughts.
3 of your videos appeared in the top 5 results for my OCPD search. I'm pretty sure it's the first time I had the pleasure of seeing them! RUclips has it's flaws, but I think it's the lack of awareness OCPD that keep the views away... I was diagnosed with mild OCD, but it wasn't until I learned about OCPD that I gained a better picture of what I might be dealing with. Your videos are great, keep making more! If you're concerned about views, maybe incorporate other, more "trendy" topics/keywords? Like comorbidities, news etc.?
Zipkik Too thanks for the nice comment. Yes, I don't think RUclips is keeping my views down specifically. But for casual RUclips users (and I believe that's what much of my audience are) they aren't aware of how RUclips works. If you subscribe, the automatic assumption is that you'll see the videos in your subscription feed, but RUclips decided that that wasn't good enough. Anyway, it's up to me to do the hard work to get people to keep tuning into my videos. Your suggestion for adding more trendy topics is a great one! And yes, lack of awareness is a big part of why I have this channel. Sorry that you're currently dealing with the disorder but it's great that you're actively looking into it on your own. Knowledge is power definitely applies to OCPD.
OCPD: My Life In Debris I watch a good amount of RUclips. True story. I have noticed that the thumbnail and title of a video can woo me into watching it. I am opposed to clickbait and if someone uses click bait I cease to watch their videos. It is that offensive to me. It is no different than lying IMO. However, clever titles and thumbnails are effective and wise. I really like how you present your videos but I think comorbidity videos could draw other people in to watch thus bringing about more awareness which is very needed regarding OCPD. I watch a really popular channel on RUclips and I have heard one of the hosts share that he has OCPD a few times. He seems to not see it as a bad thing but I wonder if you could even do a video about this person. I do believe it can be done and in a way that is appropriate and ethical. It would bring in views. I have no doubt.
Thank you so much for this channel. Therapy is expensive and so I'm trying to work on really truly educating myself on the disorder, so that I can manage it on my own. This isn't ideal, but there is so much info out there, and thank you for collating it. I'm subbed. I hit the bell, thank you!
Gerg Skoorb you are very welcome. Thank you for subscribing. I talk about exercise, some form of meditating and eating healthy as being a big component. I am with you 100% in regards the cost of therapy and having to come up with other alternatives. And although those things aren't the answer, I find that when I'm doing those things I have the energy and calmness necessary to put in the hard work trying to treat my own OCPD symptoms.
Another quality video with pertinent information. Thanks again. I wonder all the time how much happier I would be if I could just mediate my opinions and outbursts.
I really enjoyed this video. I was pretty fascinated by how so often it does seem like a person must be one or the other - being smart and being pleasant are somehow opposed. And then I found myself thinking about people I know and how I can EASILY place each person in one of the two camps. I like how you tie this subject into OCPD. I have been doing more and more reading about this, as someone close to me is working hard with his own OCPD diagnosis. I like how you say one must practice, that the mind can change through practice. You offer a lot of hope. Thank you.
Larissa Elf thank you so very much for such a nice comment. I really want the content on my channel to become more hopeful and useful over time. Thanks for sharing how the video made you feel and it's very nice of you to be open to learning about OCPD now that you know someone that has it. I'm sure they will appreciate that very much!
It likely means a lot to your loved one. Too often people don’t care to know more.. I have OCPD and it’s hard to have the diagnosis and hard when family members won’t try to understand it. It’s nice that you care.
Chlink Ink Thank you. From what I have read and what I have learned from my friend, it is an extremely difficult thing to live with, and to work on. So much in regular life can get in the way...and it takes a lot of time and energy to work on yourself! Support is so so important and I am trying to provide that, at least. I really hope you have a good support system, and I wish you the best in your own journey 🦋
I strive for a healthy balance. A quote I like is by one of my favourite characters from my favourite book series Dark Hunters "Just because you have it bad, it doesn't mean I have it good" ~ Styxx. I try to remember that in every interaction with other's, I don't want to hurt anyone.
I found this video contained just enough information on the topic to feel complete. I appreciate that you stay focused, avoid tangents, and don't speak unnecessarily to stretch it out. I did find the speed of your speech overwhelmingly quick to absorb what you were saying in one go. I had to rush to pause at the end of every sentence to digest the content. I appreciate the link to the transcripts so I could re-read it. I also found the video clip and the scenario examples very helpful to really see and grasp how this plays out in real scenarios. Hope you find the feedback encouraging and constructive. Thank you for your efforts.
I just found the playback speed options! Adjusting to 0.75x speed is a quick easy way (for me, and maybe others) to dial things down just enough to take the information in without making you adjust your process.
Kelly Marshall thank you so much for this comment. I very much appreciate comments like this. Even with RUclips analytics it's very hard for me to discern who my audience is. Based on the messages I receive it seems like a diverse group drawing from people with the disorder and without the disorder. All that said, it's hard to know which references, graphics, video lengths and speed of speech will be most effective. So it's very nice to hear both some positive and critical feedback. I found it very constructive. Thank you again.
How funny, because I wanted to comment that I appreciate that he keeps my attention focused by not lagging and dragging with uhms and ya-knows. I might have to listen to it again, but that's ok.
Royaltydeaux you are very kind for saying so. I'm excited as I haven't released in a while, but I'll be releasing two new videos this week! Thank you for watching.
Humility has nothing to do with self, it’s self awareness. It’s being aware of others and how you and others treat them. I have never met a person with OCPD that could understand that, or put it into practice. That is for us normal people to be able to. It’s simple.
The inherent problem with a channel like this is that people like us have all grown accustom to not sharing things and really don't have friends to share things with anyway. I wish you all the best but...don't expect much from your target audience. Perhaps together we can all change our ways, for the record I've subscribed and hit the bell icon.
Ma Ni I do actually expect a lot from my target audience. That doesn't mean I'll get it. But I do hold people accountable for their actions. Also, I don't believe if there are changes that I'm the one responsible for them. However, years ago when I was trying to figure out why I was unhappy in life I came across an article on OCPD. If that article wasn't written by someone I might still be miserable and misdiagnosed with OCD today. So maybe these videos can't change a person, but I'd be happy if it at least sets a few people off on a road to further self discovery. I am fully aware that even the number of people willing to concede to having OCPD is such a statistically small number of people that actually suffer with it. And even amongst those people only a select few want to change or are willing to put in the work to change. But as the the channel also works as therapy for myself, I'll keep going with it. Thanks for subscribing.
OCPD: My Life In Debris I for one would like to thank you for making these videos and please don’t stop. They have helped me, understand and relate too. I was only diagnosed because my husband threatened to leave if I didn’t get help. I personally didn’t think there was anything wrong with me, and actually thought there was something wrong with him for not seeing what I thought was very clear and obvious about anything that I pointed out. As my children got older, they also agreed and wanted me to get help. I saw pain in their eyes, it forced me to rethink my thinking and I decided to get help. It’s a work in progress and EXTREMELY hard to see what they are seeing, but your videos have opened my eyes a lot more and learning more about myself or I guess I should say; learning more of the disorder and trying to distinguish from it and myself. Your videos have also given more information for my husband to understand it as well. Please continue with your videos. I don’t have Instagram, I’m not sure how it works, so I rely on RUclips and Facebook groups.
Lindsay Foglietta first and foremost, I'm not going anywhere. So don't worry about Facebook or Instagram. I have two more videos filmed to be uploaded and I'm working on another one currently. Although my upload schedule isn't as frequent as I would like, I'm going to continue doing this for as long as I'm able. As far as your comment, thank you so much. I appreciate when others share parts of their OCPD story. I think those that read the comments appreciate it as well. Also, it's nice to read that you have a supportive family and that you're actively working on making forward progress. As you know, many of us refuse to get help or put in the work. So I'm proud of you for acknowledging the parts of you that need a little work and for being willing to do what needs to be done to have a good relationship with your family. I tell this to everyone, but please let me know if you have any questions.
Ma Ni no apology necessary. Everyone is quite welcome to their opinion. We all bounce between bad days and good days and the struggle is to have more good than bad. But your comment didn't bother me, I just wanted to give you my take on it. I hope you're well :)
Hello Darryl! I just wanted to express my gratitude for the videos that you have created and shared with the public. I am currently putting together a presentation on OCPD for my biopyschosocial course. My presentation partner and I were wondering what modality did you find the most helpful in that process of recovery? Was it potentially, DBT, CBT, or other ones? I do hope the question isn't too intrusive. Sincerely, Vanessa & Catherine
I need to vent a bit about my family... forgive me. I was always criticized for being wrong, I was never rewarded not once for being right. I believe, that my father had bad ocpd. In fact I know he did. It was one of the worst cases, I've ever seen. He was always angry, strict and very rigid. I never saw him smile, ever. I never really felt joy around him either... It was just how it was. I know that it impacted me, but don't know if I can change. I don't know if it impacted me, to the point where I can recover ....or will it just stay that way for life? I believe it was this... Coupled with trauma that formed me, the way I was. But, it was actually my father's reactions to things that made it traumatic if that makes sense. I don't know how to recover from this, I don't know if I can...he hurt us (me and my brother) so much and I know it's bad, and that he had an extremely negative impact on me....but don't know what to do. I guess talking about it is the first step. My father hurt me in more ways It sucks that someone who LOVES their children and family can hurt them so much, but in some ways it makes sense- they hold them closer and inflict pain on them because they are close. I don't know....painful topic. I feel I'll never get my childhood, and life back again. I won't. I know that something was taken from me from an early age. I guess, that's just my bill...my cross to bear? It doesn't seem right... But what can I do, what can I say? And nobody was in the family to defend me, they, we all just covered it up...blamed me. Blamed us for, didn't acknowledge my dad's serious problem. Shame was put on you if you did. It's like we all were supposed to just accept it. Abuse runs deep... He didn't fix it, came down on me. Now I have to deal with it, with this. I didn't deserve any of this. It was handed down from family. And I couldn't escape it, that's. I could have run away, should have actually. But that's something I have to live with. I was always told how good I had it, brainwashed with shame, and guilt by my mother and father. Told I had everything... These things, affect you as a kid. They were mechanisms to held it together. I should have run away. I would've been better. Would shoulda coulda.right?? I can't talk about this with my family today, the same - they'll just blame me.... Over again, I need to separate from it completely. Need distance from my family...but struggling with that. Its hard, not doing that well on my own. They will never bring these skeletons out of the closet...to defend their honor and the way of how things were. So, I know I need to leave them... I have no choice..really. It saddens me to think this. Its too much. Why was I born into a family that hurts me? Why did my mother enable it, whom loves me, but it's too painful for her to admit the problem; there was a problem. Why did she marry an abusive man? Why was I in this situation. Why me? Why...didnt I deserve a normal childhood. And why didn't i run away....from it all. That's my biggest question.
The curious spectator wow, thank you for feeling like you could share all of that in the comment section of this video. I know that you didn't do it necessarily to help others, but hearing your experiences will absolutely help others to see that although it can seem like there are no choices, there are always choices. Life isn't fair. It's not fair in any context. It doesn't owe us anything and can be brutal at times. But through adversity we can learn faster and grow quicker. And although it's painful, we can channel that pain into a meaningful and fulfilling life. But how we do that is tricky. I'd love to share some thoughts on what I believe is the best path, but I've learned that my viewers come from all over the world and that without deep insight into someone's culture, it's almost impossible to give advice that will actually work for the intended receiver. The one thing all of us can benefit from though is therapy. Therapy comes in many shapes and sizes, but it's really the beginning of getting to the bottom of how to heal ourselves. And it doesn't matter who you are, there is always a path to recovery. I can assure you of that. As someone that has come from the depths of despair to a hope filled life, I feel confident in saying that there is always a chance at a positive future. Thank you for watching the video and sharing your story.
I have OCPD and your videos are helpful. Do you think traumatic experiences can cause a person to develop a personality disorder? I read so much conflicting information. It’s hard to know what is true or what true analysis says. I want facts or at least the most current theories.
Chlink Ink I completely understand your need for facts. I was very focused on needing to have every little bit of information when I started out on this journey of self discovery and self healing. My opinion (and it's only my opinion) is that it seems possible that a traumatic experience could lead to a personality disorder. My stronger opinion is that it is more likely a patter of traumatic or distorted experiences during young developmental years that would or could result in a personality disorder. Thank you for the question.
OCPD: My Life In Debris This makes sense to me. A consistent pattern? My father was absent and erratic. My mom married several times. I grew up in a lot of chaos. I wonder if this is why I need so much order.
I don't naturally see OCPD people necessarily as right, smart, or seeking perfection. I think the belief OCPD people have that they are right, smarter, or more focused on perfection is part of the disorder. I BELIEVE the desire to be smart and perfect is a part of OCPD, but that the desire does not make one smart or perfect. It seems more closely related to being in denial. A better term might be that OCPD people are "intensely particular". There may be a correlation between kind OCPD people being smarter than abusive OCPD people, but most of my experience is with OCPD folks of average to lower intellect. Most of the trauma I have experienced in relationships with OCPD people are never over a matter of intellect-the trauma stems from intense negative reinforcement in the pursuit of controlling my actions, verbally doubting my own intellect and intentions, and wedging themselves as an obstacle in between me and my goals. It feels more like being a scapegoat for someone who has low emotional intelligence and projects their negativity onto me. My OCPD step-mother flew into a rage at the entire family because my dad was wiping the sink down with the last few paper towels from the roll, and hadn't put a new roll onto the holder yet. A higher intellectual mindset would realize he was in the middle of a project and was not finished. My OCPD manager will spend weeks of time involving 10s of thousands of dollars in labor of our entire team to support a Zoom meeting where only one person attends remotely, when our role at our company is in advanced analysis/development, not video conference support, the technology is mostly automated, and his supervisors have asked him numerous times over the last decade to reduce his involvement in live events and video conferencing. His invested time is definitely in pursuit of some kind of internal perfection of a zoom conference. but in opposition to his requested role, and yet his obsessive compulsive traits can't seem to let it go. His results are also imperfect. and the Return on Investment is far less than frugal or efficient. I think the biggest hurdle is getting OCPD people to break through the denial that they are any smarter, perfect, or more right than anyone else, and that their disorder might actually get in the way of the greater good, instead of thinking their problems STEM FROM being too smart/right/perfect/good.
jmfs3497 I think that I would agree with much of what you said in the first half of your first paragraph. Having OCPD in and of itself most assuredly does not make you smarter or any closer to perfection than anyone else. However, I feel as though you then get into anecdotal evidence. And anecdotal evidence has its own place as well in terms of how you deal with the people in your own life, but it paints too broad of a brush for entire group of people that are vastly different from one another. I think that what you describe in your last paragraph has some merit, but unfortunately the sort of realizations that you are talking about almost only come from therapy. There is a lot of good that can come from someone understanding the damage they are doing in the quest for "perfection". But that understanding doesn't come quick or easy.
Watch movie “Harvey” has a philosophy that when applied he said leads to greater happiness for him. Why are smart and pleasant diametrically opposed: i
David Esposito smart in this context means always being right when engaging in conversations with those we disagree with. Intelligence and pleasantness are not diametrically opposed.
I've been seeking advice to deal with my perfectionism and my OCPD and I'm tired to the point of rage of how often people everywhere insist that "truth is relative". A falsehood repeated often enough does not become a truth, and such is the case for this self-defeating adage (is it supposed to be true, or is it supposed to be just an opinion?). Coming across it is enough for me to simply dig my heels in even deeper. Isn't there a single person who doesn't propose some stupid brand of relativism as a solution? Is the only way to be "healthy" really this absurd self-lobotomization into becoming a subjectivist? Is being an idiot the only way to be humble?
Mutoh absolutely not. Admittedly it was easier years ago before the current climate of division we live in. I can empathize though as my opinions and my understanding of facts differs from the majority. What is missing from our side it the ability to debate respectfully. If you feel insistent on being heard, your message will only be received if it's delivered from a kind and honorable place, albeit whether the other person is wrong or the truth should be obvious. But to go around telling everyone that they are just plain wrong is only going to make your life worse, not theirs. This might not be fair. Clearly it's not. But these are the societies and communities that were built long before we were around to shape them. And one could argue it's a more human trait to protect yourself from hurt with lies than to face hard truths.
@@OCPD_support if anything, this relativism is creating more division. When it's all a matter of opinions instead of truth then reasoning is not an option for conflict resolution, and if reasoning is not used for resolving conflicts then I dread what are the other options. Often when I voice a concern, people just tell me that it's "just my opinion" and I shouldn't "impose it on others" as a way to not only dismiss me and whatever arguments I may have but also to not bother doing anything and forcing me to deal with whatever problems they may be causing for me and others. Regardless of whether it's true or false I doubt it's a kinder worldview, because it leads to selfishness, indifference and even hypocrisy. Not saying this is your case, but that's the trend I've noticed and I'd rather stand in opposition to it even if it leads to less kindness in the short run. Sorry for lashing out at you and thanks for the response, either way.
@@MutohMech I actually agree with you 100%. This video is not about these types of serious issues. This video is about how to be pleasant company in general. But the idea that everyone is entitled to their own 'truth' is a dangerous path that we can't seem to get off of. I'm dreading the outcome as well.
@@MutohMech thank you for the feedback. And I completely understand your reason for the tangent. Feel free to share any of your thoughts here. They're always welcome.
I apologize for posting a second comment but prefer to deal with one point of thought in a comment. Do you have dissociation? I was told by a therapist that I dissociate often.
Chlink Ink please don't apologize. I love receiving comments and question on my videos. I don't experience dissociation in any meaningful way. I might have brief thoughts or moments that could fall under a broad definition of dissociation, but I would say my experience is very limited. However is OCPD was brought on by trauma it would make sense that a person could in tandem develop a dissociation disorder.
OCPD: My Life In Debris Well, I have been diagnosed with both. I have read that dissociation is common with OCPD. My therapist and I figured this was just a symptom of that. But as time went by it was more than that. I have fragmentation. I’m doing my best to wrap my mind around all of this.
@@chlinkink7433 I hope that you have a fantastic therapist/counselor and that they are helping you to navigate your way through to a healthier and happier version of yourself. I see others talk about dissociation in forums and groups for OCPD, so yes, it is not uncommon.
OCPD: My Life In Debris I do have a good therapist. I appreciate your replies. This channel is really good. It’s so unique to hear from someone diagnosed with this talk about it.
@@chlinkink7433 thanks again. I haven't uploaded in a while, but I do have a new video coming out on Wednesday and one for next week as well. They are complete and uploaded, so I just need to publish them on the schedule I set up for myself. Hopefully you enjoy them.
@@OCPD_support something that is true is something that is in accordance with facts or reality. Truth is the quality or state of being true. I understand that people can differ in perspectives and opinions but truth remains objective.
@@elenapimentel1093 I believe truth is something that is easily debated either using semantics or philosophy. But no two people see the world the same way, so no two people are going to share the same truth. We share facts (ie scientific for example), but I'm humble enough to know that I don't know the true nature of things. Even facts change over time. History is littered with bad science.
@@OCPD_support it sounds like what you are describing as truth is just different people's perspectives on things. I understand that a lot of people use the word this way these days but it's simply not correct. Words have meaning and it hampers our communication when we do mot trouble ourselves to use them correctly. Truth is a synonym for fact.
@@elenapimentel1093 your definition is factually correct, but overly rigid in terms of philosophy and common usage. I would agree that 'absolute truth' is a synonym for fact.
@@Squeeky42069 you do know that just because you disagree with someone in general does not mean that everything that comes out of their mouth is inaccurate? Or does your world not contain any nuance? Can you explain what about her quote is off-putting?
@OCPDfoundation plenty of nuance but it's less the quote and more her impact on the world. There's a creator called knowing better that has a video on objectivism (her contribution to the world). He's a combat vet and teacher. It's worth a look, and I mean that earnestly. Sorry for taking out my hostility. I'm a BPDer and I thought my spouse might be a narcissist. She may still be, but I've come to understand her patterns more closely align with OCPD. Verbal abuse, next level, cyclical gaslighting, violence. So idk sorry for taking out my hostility to the world on you directly. If you'd like to legitimately discuss my issues with ayn rand, I'm open to it. But I'm not sure how to do it outside of this space. Tl;dr Ayn Rands entire worldview is foundationally flawed, so her emergent opinions aren't worth exploring.
@@Squeeky42069 thank you so much for your kind response. It was nice of you to come back and provide more context to your comment. I'm not a big fan of assumptions, and my use of Jesus and Rand was merely due to the fact that I really like the sentiment behind the words. That's not to say that you and I would see eye to eye on everything, but in my personal life, I'm ok with separating the art from the artist, as the expression goes. I am sorry to hear about what you are going through with your spouse. Having a partner with OCPD can be challenging at the best of times. I hope that you are able to find the answers that you are looking for.
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“You can be right or you can be happy.”
James Watson exactly right!
Such an important idea--humility--I'm really happy to see you encouraging us to listen and have empathy. Those of us who are driven or compulsive want so much to do the right thing that we can get caught up in being right, forgetting that the whole point of being right is to make the world a better place for everyone. It's easy to get frustrated and put the cart before the horse by insisting that we have the answer. And thanks for the shout-out, Darryl.
Gary Trosclair you're very welcome. I really like the ideas and concepts you're bringing to light on your site.
man, takes some courage to talk about such issues like you do. it is not the coolest thing one can say about oneself to have this diagnosis and yet we have to talk about so we can better ourselves. i have the same diagnosis and i find your videos very insightful. thx for sharing your experiences.
westsumatra you're welcome. Thanks for your comment. Hopefully these videos are getting better over time and I can offer more insight and hope.
Great video. I have OCPD, but in some ways, I am kind of the opposite of what you described. Ironically, I think it’s because of my OCPD. I grew up much more self righteous than I am now. I had a couple humiliating experiences (minor things that I don’t even remember) that made me realize I wasn’t always right, and maybe I should listen more. Then, I was introduced to social justice and more specifically, racism, and the ways I manifested it unconsciously. This was a crisis-type of moment for me because I am extremely morally strict with myself and I realized I had privilege that I wasn’t actively unpacking, and was, therefore, externalizing in a harmful way.
I first committed to social justice when I decided someone else was right - even though I didn’t totally understand why - and that it was my time to feel bad, quiet down, and commit to learning. I’ve learned a lot since then. And as I’ve gotten older (and started to realize how much I don’t know, that others know) I’ve become a lot more humble. But I don’t consider it something to be proud about; I consider it a duty that I will never carry out well enough. (And that’s ok - and it’s reason to keep working.)
I’m definitely not humble in every way though - If I consider myself more of an expert on something than someone else, it’s hard for me to hear things that I disagree with. In social justice spaces, if someone missteps, it’s hard for me to see value in investing in their learning by meaningfully engaging with them. (Part of that is from past experience, and part is personal pride) Recently I’ve come back in my circle of learning and realized that everyone starts somewhere and I’m not perfect either. I’ve realized it’s my duty to call in and talk with friends who cause harm unknowingly. This isn’t by saying “you’re wrong, learn from me” but by calmly and respectfully engaging in conversation and offering perspective they might not think about. My job isn’t to change their mind and be the reason for their change, but to plant a seed of thinking differently. (That’s what folks did for me when I first started - and lord knows I didn’t turn around in that first convo and tell them they were right.)
It may sound like I’m trying to fix everyone. That’s not the case, but in social justice circles there’s a big emphasis on learning and growth, so these convos are usually socially appropriate.
Anyways, like you said in your video - what’s your point in jumping in? If it’s to have people agree with you, “you catch more flies with honey.” I used to be cold and unforgiving, take it or leave it, and if you leave it it’s because you’re a lost cause. But I’m learning to consciously humble myself even in the times that I feel most self-righteous. Being self-righteous can be kept inside while your external is kind, patient, and flexible.
Thanks for posting this. Your stuff always keeps me thinking in the best ways. See, I started this comment thinking this subject didn’t apply much to me. But when I think about the ways that it does, ... it does. It’s been awakening for me to realize OCPD and my rigidity is a safety mechanism that can be broken down. I get so worked up that I think I need it, and it’s a self fulfilling prophecy.
I’m on my way to hit the bell!
Kera P thanks so much for leaving a comment on this video. I always enjoy the longer comments as they dig a little deeper into what's going on in people's heads.
I'd say that you don't sound like the opposite of what I describe exactly, but I definitely think you and I would be a little opposite, haha. Interestingly, last night I was discussing with a friend how my OCPD manifests, and we were talking about the concept of being right. So there was a time I had the more common thought process of believing I'm right and everyone else is wrong. This is what I experience when interacting with others with OCPD in support groups. I still have this overwhelming desire to be right, but it works differently now for me. I flip flop on issues quite a bit. I'm very open to new information and listening (as you mentioned) and this means that in my attempt to be 'right' about everything I have to change my opinion if presented with factual and compelling evidence. I always do my own research once I get new information (I don't take the information at face value), but if the other person gave me correct information I'm likely to think differently on the subject. So I still want to be right, but I don't do that by digging my heels in and assuming I I know everything.
If you're interested in widening your world view and seeing how their is value in everyone I'd highly suggest reading the The Happiness Hypothesis by Jonathan Haidt. It really gave me some tools to engage in a meaningful way with people I agree with and disagree with. It's also just a good book in terms of defining happiness. Thanks for watching!
Being kind in a conversation is something that is hard for ocpd people.
Being smart is not a virtue- applying wisdom is.
David Esposito 💯
I discovered your channel and just finished watching all the videos, I really appreciate your work both for the quality of the content and for the effort that as fellow OCPDer I recognize you have to put to keep this going. Looking forward to your next videos, in the meanwhile, thank you.
antaresll thank you so much for letting me know that you enjoyed the content. As you can imagine I worry about everything from how I come across, to the lighting/audio/video to whether the content is good enough. So I'm very grateful to people such as yourself for letting me know your thoughts.
3 of your videos appeared in the top 5 results for my OCPD search.
I'm pretty sure it's the first time I had the pleasure of seeing them!
RUclips has it's flaws, but I think it's the lack of awareness OCPD that keep the views away...
I was diagnosed with mild OCD, but it wasn't until I learned about OCPD that I gained a better picture of what I might be dealing with.
Your videos are great, keep making more!
If you're concerned about views, maybe incorporate other, more "trendy" topics/keywords? Like comorbidities, news etc.?
Zipkik Too thanks for the nice comment. Yes, I don't think RUclips is keeping my views down specifically. But for casual RUclips users (and I believe that's what much of my audience are) they aren't aware of how RUclips works. If you subscribe, the automatic assumption is that you'll see the videos in your subscription feed, but RUclips decided that that wasn't good enough. Anyway, it's up to me to do the hard work to get people to keep tuning into my videos. Your suggestion for adding more trendy topics is a great one!
And yes, lack of awareness is a big part of why I have this channel. Sorry that you're currently dealing with the disorder but it's great that you're actively looking into it on your own. Knowledge is power definitely applies to OCPD.
OCPD: My Life In Debris I watch a good amount of RUclips. True story. I have noticed that the thumbnail and title of a video can woo me into watching it. I am opposed to clickbait and if someone uses click bait I cease to watch their videos. It is that offensive to me. It is no different than lying IMO. However, clever titles and thumbnails are effective and wise. I really like how you present your videos but I think comorbidity videos could draw other people in to watch thus bringing about more awareness which is very needed regarding OCPD.
I watch a really popular channel on RUclips and I have heard one of the hosts share that he has OCPD a few times. He seems to not see it as a bad thing but I wonder if you could even do a video about this person. I do believe it can be done and in a way that is appropriate and ethical. It would bring in views. I have no doubt.
I wish I had found your channel a long time ago. I hope you continue to produce content despite the direction youtube is headed.
V Collura thank you so much. I just released two new videos. So no worries, I'm not going anywhere :) Even with the direction RUclips is headed in.
Thank you so much for this channel. Therapy is expensive and so I'm trying to work on really truly educating myself on the disorder, so that I can manage it on my own. This isn't ideal, but there is so much info out there, and thank you for collating it. I'm subbed. I hit the bell, thank you!
Gerg Skoorb you are very welcome. Thank you for subscribing. I talk about exercise, some form of meditating and eating healthy as being a big component. I am with you 100% in regards the cost of therapy and having to come up with other alternatives. And although those things aren't the answer, I find that when I'm doing those things I have the energy and calmness necessary to put in the hard work trying to treat my own OCPD symptoms.
Another quality video with pertinent information. Thanks again. I wonder all the time how much happier I would be if I could just mediate my opinions and outbursts.
Ma Ni thanks for such a nice comment. Mediation sounds like a pretty good idea.
Thanks
karakoram you're welcome!
I really enjoyed this video. I was pretty fascinated by how so often it does seem like a person must be one or the other - being smart and being pleasant are somehow opposed. And then I found myself thinking about people I know and how I can EASILY place each person in one of the two camps. I like how you tie this subject into OCPD. I have been doing more and more reading about this, as someone close to me is working hard with his own OCPD diagnosis. I like how you say one must practice, that the mind can change through practice. You offer a lot of hope. Thank you.
Larissa Elf thank you so very much for such a nice comment. I really want the content on my channel to become more hopeful and useful over time. Thanks for sharing how the video made you feel and it's very nice of you to be open to learning about OCPD now that you know someone that has it. I'm sure they will appreciate that very much!
It likely means a lot to your loved one. Too often people don’t care to know more.. I have OCPD and it’s hard to have the diagnosis and hard when family members won’t try to understand it. It’s nice that you care.
Chlink Ink Thank you. From what I have read and what I have learned from my friend, it is an extremely difficult thing to live with, and to work on. So much in regular life can get in the way...and it takes a lot of time and energy to work on yourself! Support is so so important and I am trying to provide that, at least. I really hope you have a good support system, and I wish you the best in your own journey 🦋
Larissa Elf ❤️
I strive for a healthy balance. A quote I like is by one of my favourite characters from my favourite book series Dark Hunters "Just because you have it bad, it doesn't mean I have it good" ~ Styxx. I try to remember that in every interaction with other's, I don't want to hurt anyone.
Simi Katra that's also a very empathetic and kind way to think about each interaction that you have.
Wow this was insightful. I will be utilising this information in my day to day life. Thank you!
Kat FF you're very welcome. Thanks for watching and feel free to leave any questions in the comments.
I found this video contained just enough information on the topic to feel complete. I appreciate that you stay focused, avoid tangents, and don't speak unnecessarily to stretch it out. I did find the speed of your speech overwhelmingly quick to absorb what you were saying in one go. I had to rush to pause at the end of every sentence to digest the content. I appreciate the link to the transcripts so I could re-read it.
I also found the video clip and the scenario examples very helpful to really see and grasp how this plays out in real scenarios.
Hope you find the feedback encouraging and constructive. Thank you for your efforts.
I just found the playback speed options! Adjusting to 0.75x speed is a quick easy way (for me, and maybe others) to dial things down just enough to take the information in without making you adjust your process.
Kelly Marshall thank you so much for this comment. I very much appreciate comments like this. Even with RUclips analytics it's very hard for me to discern who my audience is. Based on the messages I receive it seems like a diverse group drawing from people with the disorder and without the disorder. All that said, it's hard to know which references, graphics, video lengths and speed of speech will be most effective. So it's very nice to hear both some positive and critical feedback. I found it very constructive. Thank you again.
Kelly Marshall he is very orderly - lol.
How funny, because I wanted to comment that I appreciate that he keeps my attention focused by not lagging and dragging with uhms and ya-knows. I might have to listen to it again, but that's ok.
You are a really great content creator. Thank you for all of this information!
Royaltydeaux you are very kind for saying so. I'm excited as I haven't released in a while, but I'll be releasing two new videos this week! Thank you for watching.
Humility has nothing to do with self, it’s self awareness. It’s being aware of others and how you and others treat them. I have never met a person with OCPD that could understand that, or put it into practice. That is for us normal people to be able to. It’s simple.
@mollylarkins7075 it's pretty amazing to read a comment about humility that is completely lacking in humility. 🤔
The inherent problem with a channel like this is that people like us have all grown accustom to not sharing things and really don't have friends to share things with anyway. I wish you all the best but...don't expect much from your target audience. Perhaps together we can all change our ways, for the record I've subscribed and hit the bell icon.
Ma Ni I do actually expect a lot from my target audience. That doesn't mean I'll get it. But I do hold people accountable for their actions. Also, I don't believe if there are changes that I'm the one responsible for them. However, years ago when I was trying to figure out why I was unhappy in life I came across an article on OCPD. If that article wasn't written by someone I might still be miserable and misdiagnosed with OCD today. So maybe these videos can't change a person, but I'd be happy if it at least sets a few people off on a road to further self discovery. I am fully aware that even the number of people willing to concede to having OCPD is such a statistically small number of people that actually suffer with it. And even amongst those people only a select few want to change or are willing to put in the work to change. But as the the channel also works as therapy for myself, I'll keep going with it. Thanks for subscribing.
OCPD: My Life In Debris I for one would like to thank you for making these videos and please don’t stop. They have helped me, understand and relate too. I was only diagnosed because my husband threatened to leave if I didn’t get help. I personally didn’t think there was anything wrong with me, and actually thought there was something wrong with him for not seeing what I thought was very clear and obvious about anything that I pointed out. As my children got older, they also agreed and wanted me to get help. I saw pain in their eyes, it forced me to rethink my thinking and I decided to get help. It’s a work in progress and EXTREMELY hard to see what they are seeing, but your videos have opened my eyes a lot more and learning more about myself or I guess I should say; learning more of the disorder and trying to distinguish from it and myself. Your videos have also given more information for my husband to understand it as well. Please continue with your videos. I don’t have Instagram, I’m not sure how it works, so I rely on RUclips and Facebook groups.
OCPD: My Life In Debris it was a negative comment, I apologize for it. I was having a moment, as I’m sure I don’t need to explain to you lol
Lindsay Foglietta first and foremost, I'm not going anywhere. So don't worry about Facebook or Instagram. I have two more videos filmed to be uploaded and I'm working on another one currently. Although my upload schedule isn't as frequent as I would like, I'm going to continue doing this for as long as I'm able.
As far as your comment, thank you so much. I appreciate when others share parts of their OCPD story. I think those that read the comments appreciate it as well. Also, it's nice to read that you have a supportive family and that you're actively working on making forward progress. As you know, many of us refuse to get help or put in the work. So I'm proud of you for acknowledging the parts of you that need a little work and for being willing to do what needs to be done to have a good relationship with your family. I tell this to everyone, but please let me know if you have any questions.
Ma Ni no apology necessary. Everyone is quite welcome to their opinion. We all bounce between bad days and good days and the struggle is to have more good than bad. But your comment didn't bother me, I just wanted to give you my take on it. I hope you're well :)
Hello Darryl! I just wanted to express my gratitude for the videos that you have created and shared with the public. I am currently putting together a presentation on OCPD for my biopyschosocial course. My presentation partner and I were wondering what modality did you find the most helpful in that process of recovery? Was it potentially, DBT, CBT, or other ones? I do hope the question isn't too intrusive.
Sincerely,
Vanessa & Catherine
Hi, I’m just about to hop on a plane, so I’ll respond tomorrow. Or if you leave a contact email I can message you directly. Talk soon :)
Oh thank you so much! my email is: vanessahercun@gmail.com
have a safe flight! :)
Vanessa Hercun thanks. I'm in Thailand now and settling in. I'll go ahead an shoot you over an email.
I need to vent a bit about my family... forgive me. I was always criticized for being wrong, I was never rewarded not once for being right. I believe, that my father had bad ocpd. In fact I know he did. It was one of the worst cases, I've ever seen. He was always angry, strict and very rigid. I never saw him smile, ever. I never really felt joy around him either... It was just how it was. I know that it impacted me, but don't know if I can change.
I don't know if it impacted me, to the point where I can recover ....or will it just stay that way for life?
I believe it was this... Coupled with trauma that formed me, the way I was. But, it was actually my father's reactions to things that made it traumatic if that makes sense.
I don't know how to recover from this, I don't know if I can...he hurt us (me and my brother) so much and I know it's bad, and that he had an extremely negative impact on me....but don't know what to do.
I guess talking about it is the first step.
My father hurt me in more ways
It sucks that someone who LOVES their children and family can hurt them so much, but in some ways it makes sense- they hold them closer and inflict pain on them because they are close. I don't know....painful topic.
I feel I'll never get my childhood, and life back again. I won't. I know that something was taken from me from an early age. I guess, that's just my bill...my cross to bear? It doesn't seem right... But what can I do, what can I say?
And nobody was in the family to defend me, they, we all just covered it up...blamed me. Blamed us for, didn't acknowledge my dad's serious problem. Shame was put on you if you did.
It's like we all were supposed to just accept it.
Abuse runs deep... He didn't fix it, came down on me. Now I have to deal with it, with this. I didn't deserve any of this. It was handed down from family.
And I couldn't escape it, that's. I could have run away, should have actually.
But that's something I have to live with.
I was always told how good I had it, brainwashed with shame, and guilt by my mother and father. Told I had everything... These things, affect you as a kid. They were mechanisms to held it together.
I should have run away. I would've been better. Would shoulda coulda.right?? I can't talk about this with my family today, the same - they'll just blame me....
Over again, I need to separate from it completely. Need distance from my family...but struggling with that. Its hard, not doing that well on my own.
They will never bring these skeletons out of the closet...to defend their honor and the way of how things were. So, I know I need to leave them...
I have no choice..really. It saddens me to think this. Its too much.
Why was I born into a family that hurts me?
Why did my mother enable it, whom loves me, but it's too painful for her to admit the problem; there was a problem. Why did she marry an abusive man? Why was I in this situation. Why me?
Why...didnt I deserve a normal childhood.
And why didn't i run away....from it all. That's my biggest question.
The curious spectator wow, thank you for feeling like you could share all of that in the comment section of this video. I know that you didn't do it necessarily to help others, but hearing your experiences will absolutely help others to see that although it can seem like there are no choices, there are always choices. Life isn't fair. It's not fair in any context. It doesn't owe us anything and can be brutal at times. But through adversity we can learn faster and grow quicker. And although it's painful, we can channel that pain into a meaningful and fulfilling life. But how we do that is tricky. I'd love to share some thoughts on what I believe is the best path, but I've learned that my viewers come from all over the world and that without deep insight into someone's culture, it's almost impossible to give advice that will actually work for the intended receiver. The one thing all of us can benefit from though is therapy. Therapy comes in many shapes and sizes, but it's really the beginning of getting to the bottom of how to heal ourselves. And it doesn't matter who you are, there is always a path to recovery. I can assure you of that. As someone that has come from the depths of despair to a hope filled life, I feel confident in saying that there is always a chance at a positive future. Thank you for watching the video and sharing your story.
Harvey is one of the great movies of all time.
David's Midlife Crisis I'm glad someone out there agrees with me!
Truly appreciate your video.. :(
SHEIKH IDLAN RAFIQI BIN SH OTHMAN and I truly appreciate you watching :)
Being pleasant is being smart. 🤓
アブドゥラ I couldn't agree more! 😁
I have OCPD and your videos are helpful. Do you think traumatic experiences can cause a person to develop a personality disorder? I read so much conflicting information. It’s hard to know what is true or what true analysis says. I want facts or at least the most current theories.
Chlink Ink I completely understand your need for facts. I was very focused on needing to have every little bit of information when I started out on this journey of self discovery and self healing. My opinion (and it's only my opinion) is that it seems possible that a traumatic experience could lead to a personality disorder. My stronger opinion is that it is more likely a patter of traumatic or distorted experiences during young developmental years that would or could result in a personality disorder. Thank you for the question.
OCPD: My Life In Debris Thank you for responding. I appreciate that.
OCPD: My Life In Debris This makes sense to me. A consistent pattern? My father was absent and erratic. My mom married several times. I grew up in a lot of chaos. I wonder if this is why I need so much order.
@@chlinkink7433 that would make a lot of sense. I'm sorry to hear about what must have been a chaotic childhood.
I don't naturally see OCPD people necessarily as right, smart, or seeking perfection. I think the belief OCPD people have that they are right, smarter, or more focused on perfection is part of the disorder. I BELIEVE the desire to be smart and perfect is a part of OCPD, but that the desire does not make one smart or perfect. It seems more closely related to being in denial. A better term might be that OCPD people are "intensely particular". There may be a correlation between kind OCPD people being smarter than abusive OCPD people, but most of my experience is with OCPD folks of average to lower intellect. Most of the trauma I have experienced in relationships with OCPD people are never over a matter of intellect-the trauma stems from intense negative reinforcement in the pursuit of controlling my actions, verbally doubting my own intellect and intentions, and wedging themselves as an obstacle in between me and my goals. It feels more like being a scapegoat for someone who has low emotional intelligence and projects their negativity onto me.
My OCPD step-mother flew into a rage at the entire family because my dad was wiping the sink down with the last few paper towels from the roll, and hadn't put a new roll onto the holder yet. A higher intellectual mindset would realize he was in the middle of a project and was not finished.
My OCPD manager will spend weeks of time involving 10s of thousands of dollars in labor of our entire team to support a Zoom meeting where only one person attends remotely, when our role at our company is in advanced analysis/development, not video conference support, the technology is mostly automated, and his supervisors have asked him numerous times over the last decade to reduce his involvement in live events and video conferencing. His invested time is definitely in pursuit of some kind of internal perfection of a zoom conference. but in opposition to his requested role, and yet his obsessive compulsive traits can't seem to let it go. His results are also imperfect. and the Return on Investment is far less than frugal or efficient.
I think the biggest hurdle is getting OCPD people to break through the denial that they are any smarter, perfect, or more right than anyone else, and that their disorder might actually get in the way of the greater good, instead of thinking their problems STEM FROM being too smart/right/perfect/good.
jmfs3497 I think that I would agree with much of what you said in the first half of your first paragraph. Having OCPD in and of itself most assuredly does not make you smarter or any closer to perfection than anyone else.
However, I feel as though you then get into anecdotal evidence. And anecdotal evidence has its own place as well in terms of how you deal with the people in your own life, but it paints too broad of a brush for entire group of people that are vastly different from one another. I think that what you describe in your last paragraph has some merit, but unfortunately the sort of realizations that you are talking about almost only come from therapy. There is a lot of good that can come from someone understanding the damage they are doing in the quest for "perfection". But that understanding doesn't come quick or easy.
I rang the bell. I thought smart ass and dumb ass were the only option....good to hear there are other choices.
Autism Enlightenment there's always other options ;)
@@OCPD_support lol that's good!
Watch movie “Harvey” has a philosophy that when applied he said leads to greater happiness for him.
Why are smart and pleasant diametrically opposed: i
David Esposito smart in this context means always being right when engaging in conversations with those we disagree with. Intelligence and pleasantness are not diametrically opposed.
interesting
Christian Richard Plaschy thanks!
I've been seeking advice to deal with my perfectionism and my OCPD and I'm tired to the point of rage of how often people everywhere insist that "truth is relative". A falsehood repeated often enough does not become a truth, and such is the case for this self-defeating adage (is it supposed to be true, or is it supposed to be just an opinion?). Coming across it is enough for me to simply dig my heels in even deeper. Isn't there a single person who doesn't propose some stupid brand of relativism as a solution? Is the only way to be "healthy" really this absurd self-lobotomization into becoming a subjectivist? Is being an idiot the only way to be humble?
Mutoh absolutely not. Admittedly it was easier years ago before the current climate of division we live in. I can empathize though as my opinions and my understanding of facts differs from the majority. What is missing from our side it the ability to debate respectfully. If you feel insistent on being heard, your message will only be received if it's delivered from a kind and honorable place, albeit whether the other person is wrong or the truth should be obvious. But to go around telling everyone that they are just plain wrong is only going to make your life worse, not theirs. This might not be fair. Clearly it's not. But these are the societies and communities that were built long before we were around to shape them. And one could argue it's a more human trait to protect yourself from hurt with lies than to face hard truths.
@@OCPD_support if anything, this relativism is creating more division. When it's all a matter of opinions instead of truth then reasoning is not an option for conflict resolution, and if reasoning is not used for resolving conflicts then I dread what are the other options. Often when I voice a concern, people just tell me that it's "just my opinion" and I shouldn't "impose it on others" as a way to not only dismiss me and whatever arguments I may have but also to not bother doing anything and forcing me to deal with whatever problems they may be causing for me and others. Regardless of whether it's true or false I doubt it's a kinder worldview, because it leads to selfishness, indifference and even hypocrisy. Not saying this is your case, but that's the trend I've noticed and I'd rather stand in opposition to it even if it leads to less kindness in the short run. Sorry for lashing out at you and thanks for the response, either way.
@@MutohMech I actually agree with you 100%. This video is not about these types of serious issues. This video is about how to be pleasant company in general. But the idea that everyone is entitled to their own 'truth' is a dangerous path that we can't seem to get off of. I'm dreading the outcome as well.
@@OCPD_support yeah, I guess I went off on a tangent. Thanks for the videos, by the way, even this one specifically. Your channel has been a blessing.
@@MutohMech thank you for the feedback. And I completely understand your reason for the tangent. Feel free to share any of your thoughts here. They're always welcome.
Billionaires often suffer from OCD or OCPD. Or just OCPD, or both, not just OCD?
@crazy-yw2ce it would be easy to imagine that it is common among the uber-wealthy to have OCPD.
@@OCPD_support What about OCD?
@@crazy-yw2ce hard to say. OCD can be debilitating, so I would not think that it’s as common.
I apologize for posting a second comment but prefer to deal with one point of thought in a comment. Do you have dissociation? I was told by a therapist that I dissociate often.
Chlink Ink please don't apologize. I love receiving comments and question on my videos. I don't experience dissociation in any meaningful way. I might have brief thoughts or moments that could fall under a broad definition of dissociation, but I would say my experience is very limited. However is OCPD was brought on by trauma it would make sense that a person could in tandem develop a dissociation disorder.
OCPD: My Life In Debris Well, I have been diagnosed with both. I have read that dissociation is common with OCPD. My therapist and I figured this was just a symptom of that. But as time went by it was more than that. I have fragmentation. I’m doing my best to wrap my mind around all of this.
@@chlinkink7433 I hope that you have a fantastic therapist/counselor and that they are helping you to navigate your way through to a healthier and happier version of yourself. I see others talk about dissociation in forums and groups for OCPD, so yes, it is not uncommon.
OCPD: My Life In Debris I do have a good therapist. I appreciate your replies. This channel is really good. It’s so unique to hear from someone diagnosed with this talk about it.
@@chlinkink7433 thanks again. I haven't uploaded in a while, but I do have a new video coming out on Wednesday and one for next week as well. They are complete and uploaded, so I just need to publish them on the schedule I set up for myself. Hopefully you enjoy them.
Truth is not relative
Elena Pimentel facts are not relative. But I can't think of anything more relative than truth. Can you explain why you believe truth isn't relative?
@@OCPD_support something that is true is something that is in accordance with facts or reality. Truth is the quality or state of being true. I understand that people can differ in perspectives and opinions but truth remains objective.
@@elenapimentel1093 I believe truth is something that is easily debated either using semantics or philosophy. But no two people see the world the same way, so no two people are going to share the same truth. We share facts (ie scientific for example), but I'm humble enough to know that I don't know the true nature of things. Even facts change over time. History is littered with bad science.
@@OCPD_support it sounds like what you are describing as truth is just different people's perspectives on things. I understand that a lot of people use the word this way these days but it's simply not correct. Words have meaning and it hampers our communication when we do mot trouble ourselves to use them correctly. Truth is a synonym for fact.
@@elenapimentel1093 your definition is factually correct, but overly rigid in terms of philosophy and common usage. I would agree that 'absolute truth' is a synonym for fact.
😁
Nicole McCarthy 😊
I raised my eyebrows at the Jesus quote, but you lost me at ayn rand.
@markholz117 kinda sounds like you're making assumptions and judgements without knowing the full picture.
@OCPDfoundation I'm a marxist ayn rand is a meme to me
@@Squeeky42069 you do know that just because you disagree with someone in general does not mean that everything that comes out of their mouth is inaccurate? Or does your world not contain any nuance? Can you explain what about her quote is off-putting?
@OCPDfoundation plenty of nuance but it's less the quote and more her impact on the world. There's a creator called knowing better that has a video on objectivism (her contribution to the world). He's a combat vet and teacher. It's worth a look, and I mean that earnestly. Sorry for taking out my hostility. I'm a BPDer and I thought my spouse might be a narcissist. She may still be, but I've come to understand her patterns more closely align with OCPD. Verbal abuse, next level, cyclical gaslighting, violence. So idk sorry for taking out my hostility to the world on you directly. If you'd like to legitimately discuss my issues with ayn rand, I'm open to it. But I'm not sure how to do it outside of this space.
Tl;dr Ayn Rands entire worldview is foundationally flawed, so her emergent opinions aren't worth exploring.
@@Squeeky42069 thank you so much for your kind response. It was nice of you to come back and provide more context to your comment. I'm not a big fan of assumptions, and my use of Jesus and Rand was merely due to the fact that I really like the sentiment behind the words. That's not to say that you and I would see eye to eye on everything, but in my personal life, I'm ok with separating the art from the artist, as the expression goes.
I am sorry to hear about what you are going through with your spouse. Having a partner with OCPD can be challenging at the best of times. I hope that you are able to find the answers that you are looking for.