When I was 12 or 13, I told my mother something personal. Days later, she threw it back in my face during an argument. I never told her anything personal again.
Yep, for 2 years, I was treated terribly by my wife, and I gave her a path for us to be a happy couple,, she said she couldn't do it... I had to leave... within weeks she was dating her ex from 17 years earlier...
@@lonewar1 - Disgusting. Particuatly hate those type of low life exes too who opportunistically sit in the side lines like the fecal stains that they are.
It really needs to get very bad, esp' if we love our wives or partners. / Cheating is 100% a deal breaker, but if cheating is not a problem Men can take a heck of a lot of bullchit before throwing in the towel. I know, I have lived it.
@@lonewar1 $$$$ Woman Go Backward's And Men Go Forward The Most High Yahuah Elohim Said Women Are Full Of Deception And Messiah Don't Lie People Do That Razzle Dazzle LOL $$$$ 🤑💪😁✌️🤑
@ 1:25 A woman married for 10+ years and has no ideal what men want... A dog would have accidentally learned something about men in that time. This is a woman that is willfully ignorant, and extremely self obsessed. She didn't have a marriage, that was a hostage situation. I can imagine why it ended, especially if it was that self absorbed on both sides. Like she said; She doesn't care what men want. That's literally willfully ignorant behavior. Stay single, keep dating, don't ever get married {my words of advice to her}; You simply do not have what it takes to be a wife for life.
@@kyleklukas4808 She probably did and still got married. Lots of them do, either from self denial, from familial expectations or more often than anything else, the support factor. Who is going to pay for me to be home or have a part time job? Not likely another woman, but a ignorant to the reality male will...right up until he accepts the new dynamic or he divorces.
The first woman is clearly a self-absorbed princess. She appeared to be irritated about considering other people's needs. The other 3 talked about being there for each other in the way they need you. Very eye opening
THE FIRST WOMAN WILL BE BUYING A DOG OR A CAT OR BOTH TO KEEP HER COMPANY FOR THE REST OF HER NATURAL LIFE. NO MAN IN HIS RIGHT MIND IS GONNA TOUCH HER BUT A SIMP..............🤔 SHE LEARNS NOTHING FROM LIFE'S EXPERIENCES OBVIOUSLY.......🤔🤔🤔
Married 32 years to a real man , three children. He provided and protected as I was at stay home mom.Greatest life ever.Society needs to stop lying to young women and encourage love of men and family.
@@UncleKai263 yeah I know but see my old lady keeps trying to tell me that I'm just insecure they are just friends and I need to get over it. I figured I just need some other opinions.
I was told once , never ever tell your woman anything personal, emotional she remembers things like that and uses it against you.... I'm 52yrs now from London England,I was told this by a Cameroonian brother when I was in the Sudan at the age of 23yrs .
Correct. Day one, she will tell all her close friends. Then it goes into the arsenal for later usage. And if you get even marginally emotional, she will start shopping for a stronger man.
That's advice for pick-up culture, but it is important to manage how much one opens up. It's a trade off between health and attractiveness. But ya, friends and brothers are important therapists.
It’s true if you’re just looking for tail. But if you got someone at home you can’t tell literally anything, it’s almost useless to be with someone like that. There is a difference between just being you and not hiding things and crying like a baby because you’re stressed at work. This discussion is usually too reduced to be useful.
My father and brother and I used to have a great time together, in the $350,000 house my dad bought at my mother's request... till the SECOND my mother got home from work. Then it was all, "NOBODY APPRECIATES ME!!!" He divorced her, and she got the house.
@@honorb4glory606 I am so sorry to hear that my friend. Although I am not surprised in the least. Women demand constant validation and approval for their every gesture, while men are expected to simply push through adversity. The inequality which feminism has never even approached dealing with.
The woman on the far left gets it. I can tell she understands her man and she understands her role and that she is very grounded. Kudos to her. I’ll bet she stays with him until one of them dies.
@@steve_etzel Pearl totally missed it and yes, THAT woman is right. This doesn't mean that a man would want to be psycho-analized, but if he wants to open up, he DOES want to open up because this builds up TRUST and UNDERSTANDING.
Meanwhile the short haired one on the right - married 10 years clueless about men, no answer. Now she's a Living Answer to what went wrong in her marriage.
@@petercrane2065yes....unfortunately some women just fall into "the wife " role of complaining no matter how good her man makes her life. It's why men are walking away
Amazing how the first woman was supposedly at a total loss as to what men really want, and then the three sisters absolutely nailed it. Seems like she doesn’t want to get it.
Women are greatly influenced by their female friends. If she would befriend the other three, she could learn a big deal. I think, not all hope is lost on her.
Women despise men who "open up". I had a childhood friend pass away back in the 90's and while I was mourning his death, my gf at the time would roll her eyes and say "Are you done yet? Can we focus on me now?" I dumped her on the spot and gave her 24 hours to move out of my apartment. It was a valuable lesson on how women have no respect for a man that shows his feelings.
Plenty of women wouldn’t have reacted this way. She was self centered and immature. Lots of us actually enjoy being able to help others and being selfless makes us fulfilled - unless we end up taken advantage of, never appreciated or reciprocated in the slightest over the years.
The day I took my father in to a care home after 3yrs of looking after him with dementia was the hardest, most painful moment in my life. When we got home, the instant I locked the front door behind me, I collapsed behind it at the bottom of the stairs, I’d been holding it together, knowing that day was going to come. I pretty much laid there for 10 - 15 minutes sobbing, exhausted and broken. The whole time my partner sat there holding my hand and was the one who helped me off the floor. You go through life facing good times, bad times, loss of those we cherish, but you do so together as a team.
My sisters took my Dad (2018, also had Dementia) to the home, I went along, but stayed somewhat behind to ensure things went to plan. They couldn't get him out of the car, so I had to step in. He started kicking the dash of the vehicle, had to talk him down to get him out of the car and into the home. The man always kept his vehicles in perfect condition. One of the hardest days of my life.
@@NascentCoomer If you can imagine it, and it doesn't break some rule of physics, someone somewhere is doing it, good or evil. I'm sure there are crap women who would hate a man for crying at the decline of his father, but most would be understanding and supportive. I see you used the word regularly, so maybe I'm misunderstanding your post, but I find it entirely believable that this man's wife understood his grief at putting his father into a nursing home.
I knew from a painful personal experience that opening up to a woman (as a man in a romantic relationship) who is not your mother, is never a good thing. What I am shocked by is the level of lack of understanding that apparently a lot of women have. One of the women here said "There's a time and place..." . Well, yes, the time and place where a human would normally cry or become vulnerable is at home, and likely in-front of a very trusted friend or very trusted family member. And ideally, a spouse should fall into that category of trusted family member. How is this hard to understand? This isn't just a man thing. It is a human thing.
Well, in my opinion, females do have some degree of empathy but their capability of sympathy has a much higher order in an emotional spectrum. For example, a woman may cry with you while you are crying due to some tragedy (i.e., loosing a father), but she cannot comprehend the pain you go through. Males, has a much high order of empathy by nature, but we lack degree of sympathy females have. As a man, I advise you to never try to make her understand the pain you are suffering (which could also lead to self-pity for man, which I highly suggest you to never fall into it). Show her that you are the emotional and physical rock that waves hit and return to its sea bed. I don't believe its necessarily the crying that makes females loose respect to a man. It is being emotinally and physically weak.
Modern woman are incapable of love. They love what you have to offer (for free ofcorse) but don't care how much effort it costs for you to get it. They are tought they are worth it, its their right. Social engineering is a real nasty thing.
Ask a man if their wife's mental, emotional, and physical needs are their responsibility, and the vast, vast majority will say yes. Then, ask women the same question about their husbands, and see what they say.
Never date a narcissist.... When you first start talking, ask things and wait to see if she reciprocates similar questions. Like Hi how are you? If she answers but doesn't ask how you are doing back.... RUN...
It is not another person’s responsibility to bring you peace that should be something to achieve for yourself. They can be peaceful though. Peace in an inside job.
Yup. I cried ONE time in front of a woman that I confessed my love. She knew the worst thing about me. She's the only woman I have ever told that I loved that wasn't my mother or sister. Next thing I know, she moved on and says she wasn't attracted to me. She never once said that until she saw ne cry. Never again will I make that mistake. Women are lying to men and they are lying to themselves when they say they want a man who can cry and vent to them.
I am a big softie for love stories because I have a great one. My wife never made fun of me for it. When we have had a huge fight, or I was grieving, she was there for me. I think you just need to find the right woman.
I mean, you don't want to do that at the outset of a relationship, but part of knowing someone is sharing your world with them over time. If they get put off by that, fine. You're better off knowing they aren't a good match for you.
Yep, it’s pretty sad actually. It’s kind of funny (and nuts), that due to feminism many men are able to be more open with each other and the odd time when I’ve broken down sobbing with my close men friends it’s been “ok bro, let it out, talk to me anytime..etc” and then “don’t worry, let it out, then…let’s get a beer..” My experience with women (girlfriends or ex wife) has been a painful lesson: reaction of disgust, or lack of attraction, or gaslighting, or complicating things when I just need her to be there with me, like hold me and don’t judge. It’s been enraging because I have felt so emotionally emasculated, and alone with their reactions. Like others, I will do my crying on my own now. It’s as if women are “wired” to only respond to children, and men are to be shamed to just pick up that sword and shield and get back in the fight! There are exceptions of course, where men get the same treatment from male dominated environments (like military boot camps etc.), but I have been surprised how much my emotional shaming experiences are not controlled by men but by the women in my life. Also, “show me your emotions ..” but ONLY the “oh babe I missed you kind…”
My wife was often talking about renovation projects or future travels, and one day, I had enough I told her that every time she was talking about things that she/we didn't have the only thing that I heard was that she wasn't happy with my salary (low 6 fig.) And I f worked more then she was complaining that I didn't spend enough time with her and the kids. So I angrily told her that if she wasn't happy that she needed to find a better paying job or let me work 70hrs a week or find another men, I was fed up with her being relentlessly unhappy. I also pointed to her that all the Shit we have was for her and living in a wooden box or a castle had no bearing on my happiness, but having a happy family did. Also, the the reason why I wasn't constantly pointing to her shortcomings wasn't because she was perfect or talking about travels or better/often sex, It was simply because I was focused on what I had and trying to be content with it, rather than underlying all the things, womens, sex that I didn't have. That I two was capable of having the same behavior that she did, and if I did this, she wouldn't put up with this shit as long as I did! Of course, it was hard for her, but she took notes, adjusted her behavior. Once in a while I still have too remind her that I wouldn't be like her constantly unsatisfied, it forces her to respond that in fact she's not unhappy, it's just a bad habit. Still with her 33yrs. Just do the same, don't endure constant dissatisfaction from your girl, just be clear, direct, assertive and the sooner you will do this, the quicker you will find out if she's wife material. My2centsadvice
The constant lack of of being satisfied with our house gets to me. Keep in mind that we live in an expensive area in California so our house is quite nice as it is. She wanted a new kitchen so we got it done (which was very expensive). Now she wants new windows for the house which will be at least 50k. When I make a big commission at work my goal is to pay off debt and pay some of our bigger bills such as private school for my boys. She just thinks about the stuff that she wants which will never actually Make her happy when she gets it and will just move onto the next thing. Women are clueless about money and how hard it is to actually get it. I find that to be incredibly frustrating.
@jbp122 that's why we need has men to point out the depth of their problem and point out that the problem is within and not about the outside world or others. People in dirt poor countries have women that are happy with what they have. And if they are religious you can point out that: Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water (ex: consumerism) will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him (ex: connections, relationship, family or faith if you arereligious) will never be thirsty again. My2centsadvice
No, you just got lucky that she was willing to actually listen. Most women won't listen, they'll call you some flavor of ist, phobe, or ism and then rob you blind.
@@jbp122 women have not the art of being happy or content. They are in the art of finding problems where there are none.. men love peace, women don't love peace. its simple as that peace for women is boring. ALl i can say to you brother... if the relationship one day fail..its not your fault..but don't ever get into 1 again...
I grew up in a dysfunctional family. Abuse was common. The first time I tried to commit self deletion I was 9 years old. Addiction runs rampant in my family all my siblings have problems with alcohol and or drugs and I myself am a alcoholic and addict. (Clean for 20+ years). I shared some of my childhood trauma with my first wife. Anytime she started losing an argument she would throw what I told her (in confidence) in my face. Plus she told her girlfriends all about my childhood abuse. Never trust a woman with personal trauma.
Similar life experiences here. First attempt at 7 years old, physical and emotional abuse from a narcissistic parent. I was lucky enough to avoid the addiction issues that run on both sides of my family. Surviving is its own reward and sometimes punishment.
CORRECT....so did mine.... all the parents where my kids went to school were all made aware of the 'shortcomings' of my disability/details of my accident at work....after our divorce....
Yep, women never forget a slight. And they never forget anything that they could use against you in an argument. They'll dredge something up that happened 20 years ago if that's what it takes. You have no business getting involved with a woman like that. It's all about her, and nothing about you.
@PEEGIII i looked for a woman that i thought my future children would love. 20 years later im still living a fantasy. Dont even tell people because they would think im making things up.
My wife and I have been together for over 30 years. A few years back I had to put our pet dog down suddenly and it crushed me. When we got home I sobbed like a child. It shocked my wife seeing me in such a vulnerable state. She accepted my openness because it was justified. We now have another dog and life is good. Stay safe everyone
@@mltiago Really? We don't know that. Wait until 5 years from now when they are in an argument and she lashes out with "You are such a wimp. That is why you turned into a crying little boy when our dog died. I never respected you after that". He will be devastated. There is no time limit to when she will use it against him.
I see your experience and I'll raise it! I was with my girlfriend for 6 years, then got engaged. 2 years later, planning the wedding for the following year (so 8 years together by that point). My younger sister died of cancer. She was 27. It was devastating. My fiancee left me 2 months later because she "couldn't rely on me emotionally" anymore. That was about 12 years ago. Took me a year to get myself together. A year or so later I met a Russian girl. We got married within 8 months of meeting each other. We've been married about 10 years, with 2 amazing kids. I will never cry in front of my wife or kids, lol.
We used to call them divorced women not single mothers. single meant never married. Not a normal situation. Sad the times have changed. Married 36 yrs, 3 kids. Very happy, always supporting my husband.
The woman at 1:30 is spot on about what men are looking for. And a man has to be _very_ selective about what he opens up to a woman about emotionally. Miss that, and she will start shopping for a stronger man. You're allowed 5 minutes of crying when your mother dies. That's it. No other reason.
I don't believe that, and that definitely hasn't been my experience. There's a time and place. Never showing any emotions just means you're both living in la la land, knowing that shit is going on but choosing to ignore it. Sounds like a recipe for disaster to me
So why... pay for this? YOu know that dont exist, you know you will get a parasite that depends on you, you know if you show any weak she will bail, when problem happens youre on a timer, fix it or se leave and take atleast half, the kid its not yours its hers and she will alienate then. WHY PAY FOR THAT SH IT PRODUCT?
Every one of my buddies who has ever opened up to a woman it was always a disaster every time 100% of the time because she immediately started using that against him in every argument until the relationship died
I was open and honest with my ex-wife. I had a pretty good childhood, but I spent 10 years in the Army, and that does things to your head--some of which aren't very nice. She'd ask me why I have bad dreams, or why I do X and Y a certain way, so I'd explain it to her. I was open about my fears and such. Now, I've pretty much managed my baggage--it's still there, but I handle it pretty well. I'm a professional-level Stoic, and I was in my 40s when I was married. So when she was angry, or wanted to hurt me for some reason, or was trying to control me, she'd use all that ammo against me. Now as I said, I handle my baggage. So it didn't hurt me that she brought that stuff up--what hurt me was the fact that she professed to love me, and yet was obviously trying her damnedest to hurt me emotionally, and to belittle me, and had so little respect for me. She also had status issues--she had pretensions to high status--her family was wealthy, and she was starting law school. She accused me of "lacking ambition" because, after having spent years in the military, and years in university, and more years in corporate management, and a few years running my own business, I chucked it all and went for a skilled blue collar field with good pay, good benefits, and a high demand. I didn't want to open the latest fad restaurant, or start a fashion company, or go into high finance--I'm too old, too beat up, and too uninterested in that stuff. And she wasn't the first woman I've had a relationship with who pulled that stuff, either. But I'm 50 now, and successful in my career, so she'll be the last to be in a position to pull that crap. I'm not bitter--I feel bad for her, because she'll likely never be happy. And I don't hold it against women in general--I have no problem with women. But I'm too old and too tired to deal with all that BS that comes with relationships anymore--and lord knows the women who would otherwise be in my prospective pool have plenty of baggage of their own, and I just don't want to deal with that anymore. I don't want to have to start rebuilding my life yet again at this age--so I'm content to just spend my time doing my own thing, and living in my own space, where stuff stays where I put it, and I don't have to coordinate plans or purchases with anyone else.
This. I'm 49 and feel too old to deal with women's behavior. They come to my place and start making up rules. Sorry babe, I worked very hard to be able to chill.
Respect mate, I’ve just spent 23 years in the Aus Military and divorced because the job took me away and yes have had medical issues like you as described. I’m financially secure, own my home now. She is trying to get me back, sorry too late, she used those issues against me and left.
I'm 43. The crap I put up with in my younger years make me cringe. I simply can't be bothered anymore. I have things to do and the things I don't want to do... well, good luck trying to make me.
Totally correct sir. Never...I repeat never share you emotions or fears to your woman unless you want to be tormented by her about your weakness in the future. A certain amount of fear in your women will help her respect you and not claim you are weak.
No past trauma lmao so a unicorn!! And beauty and fertility fades with age! Devote your life to someone who will leave once you age and expect to give you nothing. Sounds great!
@@stealth_mode_8313 I've been married for (doing maths in my head) 18 years. I'm religious. He's not. Both of us have traditional values and trauma. He has more trauma than I do. I'm doing my best to let go of the worry of being left for simply aging. I'm 47. Can't be young forever.
As an older guy, who's almost 60, who's been married more than half my life, being loved and supported over decades of loyalty, is what matters to me. We both made and lost money, we both had and lost looks, we both had and lost sex. Those things actually come and go. It's what you are left with afterwards that you value. I think if you are lucky you can determine what you value ahead of time.
I am in my 60’s and have been married 42 years. I could not have said it better myself. There are ups and down, good times and bad, hot times and dry spells. She has been by my side through all of that, alway supportive (and I of her). As you get older you realize what really is important, love and loyalty, the rest is just distractions. However she may have a few more things on her list 😊
They have no concept of what you just posted. As today women know everything about everything. Just ask them. They will tell you they do.. I explained this to a young women why she was 18... She actually listened an invested her money in stocks. Can take care of herself. Avoided the College debt trap. But still has a boyfriend that is goofy as any 20 year old. The only think she wants is Loyalty. While he cares about her. It seem to work for both of them. As she does not abuse him but tells him she loves him anyways. Inpite of his faults and short coming. As they will work it as time passes..Then they really will know each other..
There is a difference between a weak man and a man going through some things. That is when it's the woman's job to comfort him. Not put him down, not try to take his place, not leave him. A woman should always be his soft spot and his peace. I heard of a man having a breakdown because the pressure of being the foundation and supporter of the family was getting to him. His wife left. What she should have been doing is praying for him.
There is no difference in women's eyes anymore. None. Hasn't been for at least the past 20 years and it's getting exponentially worse. Walk away. They don't deserve us.
@LysippeLee I’m just curious as a female, what defines a weak man and a man just “going through things”? I speak for myself needing to know this answer personally. I bring extreme loyalty and honesty it pains me to lie and I’ve never cheated but have been cheated on. To be cheated on is that a weak male? Does addiction issues or should I say priority for addiction over family/wife make you a weak man? Or is that just a man going through something? What about when physical abuse is in the mix and children, what should I feminine woman do in those situations?
I knew a girl who would always let people know how compassionate she was of men and her BF, and how her bf and men in general should open up to women more. Well, few days later, there she is saying her bf is such a bitch because he shed a tear over a movie scene in which a dog gets dumped by its owner and dies painfully. People, never believe what women say. Believe their actions. And only believe their words when they come out when they are in their emotions, because they can only say so much, but almost all their decisions and actions will ultimately be based on how they feel in the moment.
there was a female MMA fighter on Joe Rogan who dumped her MMA boyfriend because he got caught in an arm bar and tapped out "like a bitch" even though she herself had tapped out plenty of times.
Very good advice at 1:28 - "they want a woman that gives them space to be them + they want someone that supports them + a woman that allows him to be the head but still can be the neck that holds him through whatever it is that you both need to go through + someone that's his peace, someone that can bring some form of tranquility into his life when everything feels like it's all over the place or to just actually be at peace and not bring so much like problems or always moaning or plucking things out of thin air to make something happen from past trauma or whatever it is"
The women who was married 10 yrs and could not say what men want, shocked me (if she was being honest). I have been married since 1980. I am pretty sure my wife could tell you what men want, or at least what her man wants. She saw me through some good times, she saw me through some bad times, as I did her. I did open up to her on occasion but mostly not. I saw and lived through some horrible things in my law enforcement career, when I told her about them she was supportive. Often she heard about them when my cop buddies and I were together with the wives and we cops would be rehashing the stories. On the way home she would say, why didn't you tell me? I would shrug and say, honey you married a man, and we keep some of our stuff locked up. I always felt it is only safe to let it out with those who were there. Long story this love story I am living, is only possible because we are a team. I never cared how much money she made. I did not care when we were 2 broke college kids, nor afterwards. For the record, she made roughly 3 times what I did the last 7 years before we both retired. Ladies, your man wants love, support, and peace. A help mate he can count on that won't go bad mouthing you to her family or friends. And guys, you should provide the same.
Loyalty. 100%, that woman knows. Loyalty is one of the most important things on our lists. Someone who seeks peace is a positive important trait as well.
There are different levels of opening up. My dad refused to cry at his own mother's funeral. The only times I ever cried in front of my wife are when we had to put our dog down. What's so surprising about this clip is that they don't talk over each other.
Showing your emotions is only ok in a few scenarios. The birth/death of a child The death of a beloved pet The death of a wife. Other than that, any show of emotion is not tolerated. By society. You'll just get told to man up
@@polpol1005 Men show their emotions in front of other men. Because other men won't tapdance on your grave and openly mock you for having one bad day. Other men know what's up. They've been there. Women don't understand men's hardship, loneliness, and the relentless uphill battles they face every day. Actually let me partly retract that. I've seen videos where women tried transitioning to men and suddenly felt it all for themselves, rather that just hearing the stories and assuming they were BS. They go into severe depression and often commit suicide. The world is very cruel towards men. Women have no clue. None. And the last thing a man wants after having to fight the whole world all day, is to come home to another fight over nothing. She just became the enemy living in his house. Traitor.
The reason they weren't talking over each other was the topic was focused on them, reflected entirely on the fact that women are mean, vindictive creatures that will hurt you any way possible. Each woman was trying to minimize their time in the spotlight. They couldn't even say "not all women" or give a personal example of when they didn't do that. They were looking in a mirror and saw their own dark sides.
The lady speaking at 2:35 nails it for me. As a man I want a ride or die loyal woman who admires me and believes in me. She's not going to leave me when I stumble and that gives me the security and strength to persevere no matter what. It's the ultimate motivator for me. I'm lucky, my wife is exactly like this. She's seen me hit a real low before and she knew I would come through it, no doubt. Now whatever is mine, is hers also.
10 years and didn't learn much of anything?? Woah. I was married for 3 and a half years, learned a lot about myself, about my ex wife, and a lot about that lifestyle of being married, and all the things she taught me. But 10 years and you're still clueless? Either all you are is buried in your work or you're completely self involved even at home. Probably both. Who would want to stick around that?
She was deflecting with humor, but it was still disgusting and shocking to watch. Imagine asking a retired professional athlete for advice about their sport and they say, "Haha you've really put me on the spot I've never thought about it before. I'm no longer a professional so I must not be very good, right?"
FACTS. I learned a ton from a lot of relationships, I thought that was such a weird answer too. Line she never considered that before "what do OTHER ppl want".
Let's be real for a moment. Women do not necesarily have to learn anything. All they have to do is say a man was abusive or narcissistic and everyone believes them, pities them, gives them " a chance at the happiness they deserve" and is then confused wile she failed again. LOL
The woman on the end couldn’t think of one thing a man would potentially want because it’s not something she’s ever thought about in the first place. Total narcissist But the woman on the apposite end it a total Queen. Once in a lifetime girl
When my husband and I married 35 years ago, I was broken and confused about life. His Mother passed when he was a young 12 year old boy, and he had to become a young man sooner than expected. Before we were married, I told him we could always share my mother, and until she passed away June 19th, 2015, she was everything to us all. My Mother always told me, "You teach a man how to treat you. You be kind to him and treat him with respect. Pray for him and with him. Love him and make him feel that his home is his castle. Hug him, tell him you love him, then show him by doing things for him that's unexpected. Be the woman he looks at with love in his eyes, mind, and heart. Nurture his soul. In order to heal, you have to come to terms with your past failures and shortcomings, then get yourself together to be the best version of you.
I have heard a lot of testimonies from men about stuff they dealt with over the course of their lives (some of it rather horrifying and you would have no idea just by looking at them). They have baggage they bring into the marriage. If/when they start to open up about it and their spouse is dismissive or chooses to weaponize it, that destroys the relationship so fast.
Even when they dont weaponize it, they often cant handle it. Like they dont like how men express it, so they have to make theirbman "learn" how to express themselves. Women have to stop changing men and learn to appreciate them
This happened to me exactly. I woke up from a war dream with a start and my wife asked me what’s wrong. I told her it was just a dream and that I miss my buddies. She has been going around bringing that shit up every chance she can. From friendly conversations with friends to arguments, to medical conditions at the doctors office. Keeps telling everyone I have PTSD without regard to my request to stop.
Everyone has heard the expression "Don't argue with stupid people. They will bring you to their level then beat you with experience." Same concept "Don't get emotional with a woman. They will bring you into an emotional argument and they have a hell of a lot more experience than the man"
Blah, blah, blah, blah for 5 minutes. "So you mean loyal." Yeah. Blah, blah, blah, blah for 5 more minutes. "So you mean pure." Yeah. Jesus. Get to the point. This is another thing men want. Part of being his "peace" is getting to the damn point and shutting up otherwise.
Yes, the million words...too men turns into nagging. That's why women complain about us not listening. It's because, your talking to here yourself. I got the message in one minute, after that. I'm not listening. I have my direction already. Added words are nonsence unless I ask.
You think thats a lot, wait till you have a SO in the house 24/7. You will train your ears to hear that beautiful sound of a the cricket that you hated years earlier. That cricket will be your joy.
Never cry in front of your woman. Most women will immediately lose respect for you the second she sees you in a vulnerable state. It's a lesson most of us learn the hard way.
Amen. And never tell her your most vulnerable secrets. Just DON'T. Take it to your grave, have a male friend you can trust for that. NOT a woman. No matter how much you love eachother and how perfectly matched you are.
You’re with the wrong women. I’ve had a lot of girlfriends over the years and cried at times with most of them. One tried to use it against me and she had giant red flags that I stupidly ignored in the beginning.
Loyalty, affection, lack of conflict, calm discussion of issues. Sex isn't the most important thing, but having someone to help take care of the day to day.
1:29 I believe that's the first time on Pearl's show that I've heard any of these women say "I THINK", and that puts her ahead of the others. And she was actually very reasonable and fair with whatever she said.
I just dated a lawyer who made $25k a year more than me. She was constantly broke and her credit was garbage. I paid the bills and am never broke. What do men want? Speaking for myself I just want my woman to be nice to me . At my age , everyone has baggage. Just be nice and loyal.
Imagine someone telling you that you cant voice your feelings or emotions because she might leave you or judge you. TO ALL MEN READING THIS: Any woman making you feel bad for communicating your emotions, crying, or anything related to expressing how you feel... is not worth a second of your time and should be immediately put into the trash bin of your mind were they have always belonged.
I'm thinking a good shit test would be to tell her something very personal that's a complete lie. Then when she throws it in your face as weakness, tell her that it was a lie and she failed the test. There's the door. Get out.
@@protorhinocerator142- your playing with fire kid. testing & liying to your 'so' is a bad idea. you either want to earn their respect by giving them respect or you're not the right person for them and the relationship will struggle.
@@Mahnamahna1100 Women invented the shit test. They do it all the time. Men need a response. Women weaponize men's emotions. Men don't do that. This is fair.
This goes to show none of these women have a clue what men want. Just one thing, (well, two 😂) but the main thing is respect. Respect us for choosing you, respect us for protecting you, respect our feelings (yes we have them, but don’t burden you with them), respect us for providing for you, respect our loyalty to you by returning that loyalty. Just having that respect makes us have faith in the relationship. N.B. Never disrespect your man unless you are happy for him to leave you. (And vice versa guys!)
At least we know what to expect now even if it's brutal. Before alternative media this kind of information was not common knowledge. False hope can be dangerous
She is wise. I have known my wife since we were 9, I am 43 now. We have not so much as argued, because, we understand each other and respect each other. She is my world, and I hers. We love being around each other. I couldn't imagine saying or doing anything to hurt her, it just doesn't exist with us. We can literally tell how the other person is feeling just by being around each other, without words and we both know how to lift the other up. We don't have negativity in our lives because we appreciate who we have. We been poor, we been broke, we rose together. It is about paying attention. If i notice she is out of something, i don't care if its 3 am, i go out and get it for her. She will never do without anything. She has no wants. I keep that list checked. She does the same for me.
There are people men can open up to , and it’s definitely NOT women. Men can open up to the respected men of their bloodline and men of his close circle. Never show your women vulnerability… she will lose respect for you , and the effect is irreversible.
Damn, that's so insanely cynical. Sure, some women will take advantage of vulnerability, but most women respect and appreciate that kind of honesty if it's delivered from a place where the intent is to develop a closer bond with their partner. I suspect you might be conflating the tendencies of needy, whiny men who tend toward co-dependence (who do indeed turn women off) with confident, competent men who are comfortable having an intelligent conversation about their own shortcomings (who women tend to treat with the utmost respect).
@@CosmicIceCream No women expect men to be a dependable strong rock like granite but when he shows emotional weakness he becomes like sand rather than granite.
@@muzzmac160 Women respect men who respect themselves and have standards. If you want to be respected, you have to make it clear you won't be treated otherwise and walk away from toxic women who'd do something like this. In fact your entire assertion presupposes that the man somehow needs the woman more than she needs him when precisely the opposite is true, or at the very least they need each other equally. And it's not all women, either.
Im with you there. Now there is a difference between vulnerability and being emotional. I mean if you need to cry and or explode, go for a walk in the woods and get it done, instability has no place in the home. Though you can speak about things you have gone through and overcome. What you learned and how you persisted. Though if you dealt with it then it wont piss you off is she tosses it out there in a fight. If you get triggered, get therapy. When trying to sort your thoughts seek men.
@@CosmicIceCream most women and probably a huge % of the population want a strong man and showing weakness is a critical mistake for long term. It's only a matter of time till she loses interest.
My mom died 3 yrs ago and i was devastated from it. I had a relationship back then and the only thing that i could think of was talk it with her. She Left after 3 weeks cause i was in too much pain mourning and crying she said i wasn't paying enough attention to her anymore and to her problems and her feelings basically telling me i was selfish.... From that point on i decided to never ever talk about my real painful emotions whith a woman.
You also dodged a bullet. Imagine marrying such a person, investing years of your life, only to have her decide she deserves more, leaves, and destroys your life in the process.
Oh my word. That's a devastating loss. 3 weeks is hardly any time to move through the grief cycle. Completely useless and selfish woman. However, not all women are like that. I, for one, will die for my man. 52 now, known him since 14, married at 23 and we could write each other's diaries. We trust each other because we have proven our loyalty and reliability. There has to still be women of honor out there for you.
The "opening up to women" point Pesrl is spot on. Women mis understand this. The situation is that women want to feel like they have an emotional connection. However, that is not a man opening up, as this leads women to loose respect for him.
I have been in 5 serious relationships in my life over the past 15 years, I have only truly opened up to 1 person, my fiancé, and when she never used it against me I knew she was the right person for me, but over that time I have also realized that most women WILL use what you say against you, even if it is an emotional childhood trauma that you shared with them.
Fit, feminine, beautiful, faithful and inspirational. That's what a woman needs to bring to the table for a man to want a long term commitment to her. None of these things are limited to one way to achieve. Achieving these things by a woman is unique for each man.
Those traia IS more and more in extiction dude Fit faeminine IS Very hard nowadays kkk When u find a woman at least fit and feminine most of time she IS 3o4 kkkk
I would never open up to a woman. If I need advice I speak with close male friends - that way I get an honest response and being men, it is never held against you.
Somehow I got it beat into my head from a young age that life can not only be a challenge but outright dangerous. Maybe all the talk of world wars, the depression, oppressive political ideologies, dangerous criminals etc etc. did that. I look at potential mates quite strongly as a team mate in the struggle to keep the wolves at bay. That means she has to be sensible and industrious and have a bit of the feminine that's so pleasing. I think I just described my mother.
That kanye jacket and justin beeebeer hair is not helping her chances. But she knows thst. She wouldnt even change her look..no chance she is going to change her values or personality
I'm 70; wife & I have been married 37 years (2nd marriage for both) and raised 6 daughters. Our observation is that men quietly desire aporeciation / gratitude. And, of course, that means that the woman needs to actually feel and express gratitude to him.
I’m 57 years old, married 15 and together 20 years. I have 2 best guy friends, all 3 are like brothers, we discuss nearly everything good and bad. I can be my 100% self with these guys. It’s been like this for over 30 years. T.his is my second marriage and I met my now wife, one of my must haves was I need someone to work with, and I can now say she didn’t like the word “WORK” mainly because it wasn’t romantic. 20 years on we’re still working together, still in love and more importantly I can still be myself. I have 2 daughters and I I’ve them, there’s two types of girls. One you take home to meet your parents and the others you leave to the streets. Who determines parents or street is the women.
I dont really open up to my lady about my feelings, but I do try to explain to here about the person I am and why I think the way I do. Majority of the time, she just tells me I'm weird or really doesnt want to hear it, (body language). This is present day. Really considering walking away after 6 yrs. When I brought the issue up, which she told me she wants me to tell her if she does something I dont like, she goes on this, "well you do this this and this.. ", instead of addressing what I just said. 44yrs old. Tired...
true. but the way i experience it, its those 4 pillars that women dont seek for themself and feel like "its work" when they have to do that "for" the men and thus blame you, even without words, for not beeing like them, not beeing in the same need, that they have. they know as a men, youre different, but they dont want you to be different and what guys want, often, is very primitiv in their point of view
My last relationship the girl accused me of being predatory for telling her I liked her. I was berated for being too happy in the relationship. I was told I was ridiculous for being sad when she went back to the West Coast. Any mild sort of frustration I had was turned into wild mood swings. The entire time she was telling me to be open with her. Women do not want their men to open up to them period.
A faithful wife (rare these days), peace & quiet aka: no drama, occasional home cooked dinner & regular sex would make me very happy. I've been married & divorced twice because none of these happened
No one mentioned respect. Lots of men leave women because they feel disrespected. Lot's of women, at first, idealize their man. After they find out he's just a human being like lots of other men, they become disappointed. Once that happens they lose respect and that's something they can't hide.
As much as most of these women seem genuine and sincere, and I believe they are, I think there's a subconscious thing, if their partners were vulnerable to them they'd pull back, even if it wasn't a conscious thing.
I love my fiance, and as wonderful as she is...she re-solidified my stance that you can't open up or share things that have hurt you in the past. Never met a woman that really values a man opening his heart and sharing his pain without at least once backhanding him for it later on. I can't speak for other guys but even my mother proved that to me (I'm adopted and my birth mother was the same way). Nope, the armor stays on. Our elders need strength, our partners need strength, our children need strength, our coworkers and acquaintances need it...hell even our pets need strength. Let a single person see weakness and that's it. The quote "Only women, children and animals are loved unconditionally" is the truth I say with anonymity. There are MANY who understand this to be true
Don’t call your husband or your wife your partner. They are your spouse, they aren’t a partner in crime or business partners. A spouse is much more than a partner.
I never found myself wanting to open up to my woman. Talk? Sure. Tell her about something I did that I was proud of etc, sure. Looking for an attaboy from her? Sure. Telling her my true feelings? Not a chance in hell.
Half the time i caught it fir wanting an atta boy... God forbid uf u repeated myyself over simething i said 10 years ago but i better not say a peep if she does it
I don't want atta boy, i want them to know who they're dealing with so she doesn't waste MY time and if your those: mess with me & you won't want to see my emotional side because it might be something disturbing, she will never ask to talk about your emotions... Ever! 🤣
I’ve had a couple cool chicks who never used it against me. A couple out of triple digits. It happens. There are a couple / few. The rest freak out, watch you like a circus freak, or start leaving immediately. It’s a shocker when a ultra supportive women freaks out when she sees a imperfection in you. You’d think the opposite but any chick needs to be tested on this one.
My wife and I have been married for 51 years. You have to be friends. You can't stay in lust forever LOL. You absolutely have to trust each other, and loyalty is paramount. Forget needless drama and chaos that add nothing to a positive relationship. Never lie, the truth might hurt once for a little while but a lie hurts forever. Be willing to forgive and be willing to be forgiven, then move on. Never bring up a problem without offering at least one solution. Talk about what you like...and what you don't like. Everyone changes over time, viewpoints, attitudes, etc. If you don't feel the same about something anymore, let your partner know. ALWAYS have each other's back. Be the one they can count on if everyone else in the world is against them. Be honest without secrets. Little surprises are appreciated. Try to be helpful even if you aren't sure exactly how to help. Good Luck.
Even with the best of intentions, women can't help themselves from using EVERYTHING you say against you. When you are opening up to her, I honestly believe that she truly wants to help and support you. The problem is that women are so emotional that later on, when they are angry, they can't control their emotions and will use anything to hurt you. They can't help it. Therefore, why would I tell anything to my wife that I know will be used against me in the future?
As a man I would put respect and being desired above feeling loved. Love is important, but I think we want to be as much her world as she wants us to be her world. Wives respect your husbands. Husbands love your wives.
I remember one time I was having a hard time at work, I told my wife, she stressed out about it, and ended up going to hospital, I ran her home at 4am, So the next day I had all the same problems, except without any sleep, I never told her ever again.
Tears can and should be shed by Men. At the loss of a close loved one. Tears of Joy. These happen in life. The more extraordinary the situation the more acceptable it is. But a Man who tears up at the drop of a hat? No. There is definitely a need for stoicism and emotional control for Men in normal life. In my life, between my wife and I, there was a miscarriage pregnancy. After the immediate risk to her life was past the enormity of what happened, the loss of a child, hit us. We held onto each other for dear life and cried for that child we would never hold. I couldn't tell you how long that lasted but it was desperately needed by Both of us. There is no shame in such a moment.
@@Tim99GT Thank you. That was many years ago now. We were blessed with four healthy vibrant children. Most of whom are now adults. But every August comes a week and a day that only my wife and I share a sadness few of our closest friends and even our children know about. So many couples have stories like ours. And it's all mostly out of sight and out of mind.
Can you imagine how much women could learn if they read all these excelent comments? By the way, I have a really loyal and emotional dog. If I'd need it, I tell her my profound emotions. I happy with my life, have great parents, son and daugther and still supporting them all my time and also have time for myself. Best time ever for me.
It's always interesting how they dance around without ever getting to the actual real point. Your spouse *should* be the person you can open up to. And generally, I see husbands trying to be supportive of their wives emotional needs. If a wife loses respect for her husband because he is human and has feelings or moments of weakness, that says more about her than him. Its a clear sign that she doesn't understand the weight of the responsibility that husbands bear. If she weaponizes that sacred trust, that says more about her than him. Men know that physical wounds heal, even if they leave scars, but emotional wounds last much, much longer. We are not unaware of this simple fact, hence the reason we do not allow ourselves to be vulnerable with someone who will attack our weaknesses. It's like when your sparring coach rings your bell because you let your guard down and got complacent. We learn quickly. Generally speaking male friends have nothing to gain by hurting you, and nothing to lose by telling you the truth. When that's true for your spouse, she is your best friend.
My father died of cancer, then about a year and a half later my mom died of a pulmonary embolism, 2 weeks after that my wife left me cause I was too depressed. Never show weakness.
That wasn't weakness, her leaving was. She didn't know how to support you or didn't want to. Either way, you're clearly better off without her. Sorry about your parents, many blessings to you
Man.... Sorry to hear this... I dunno if it's don't show weakness, it's more like don't date losers like that. I cried for 2 weeks when my mom died and my wife was there for me. When I lost my first job I cried as well and she held me. You need to find a better breed.
she missed the part she agreed to that says "for better or for worse" or however it goes in english... you stand side by side in the bad times and you celebrate in the good times...
@@those1kidds Yep. I lost my dad about 14 years ago and cried for him. I just put my dog down last week and cried for him too. My wife cried with me both times.
Your weakness left you when she left. You dodged a bullet my friend i know someone that went through that same exact thing and met the love of his life afterwards. God bless you rest in paradise
The disrespect of my ex wife is and was appalling, I am guilty of many things in my marriage,I often thought if I did more it would have made things better,now I know there’s nothing I could have done that would have stopped her from undermining me etc,if we never spoke again I wouldn’t care.
I finally found a woman that has a mindset like this. When I have a tough day, she will listen to my problems, but if I whine too much, I can see her get annoyed and start to shut me down. You need to have a good balance of a supportive partner without turning her into your mommy you can go cry to at any time. I do a lot for her and she thanks me all the time for it. It makes me feel valuable and appreciated instead of like a slave always trying to please my master. Just simply being appreciated and recognized is all most men need and for the woman to not feel entitled to special treatment without also earning it. If you sit around all day creating problems to fight about because you're bored or "want to see the passion" of your man upset, you are probably a psychopath.
Yes, we don't care if you're broke all we care is that you stick with us while we're building a future for us both. Incredible to see there are women who still understand when they deserve it all.
When I was 12 or 13, I told my mother something personal. Days later, she threw it back in my face during an argument. I never told her anything personal again.
My mother must be related to your mother.
"You can always tell me anything..."
All moms are daughters of Eve.
If it has a vagina, it cannot be trusted.
Was your Mom divorced from your father? What she did was not the mark of a real mother, not at all.
Do you know just how difficult it is to make a good man angry enough to leave you? You have to be relentlessly bad to him to make it happen.
Yep, for 2 years, I was treated terribly by my wife, and I gave her a path for us to be a happy couple,, she said she couldn't do it... I had to leave... within weeks she was dating her ex from 17 years earlier...
Yeah true. Took me about 2 years of nightly disrespect.
@@lonewar1 - Disgusting. Particuatly hate those type of low life exes too who opportunistically sit in the side lines like the fecal stains that they are.
It really needs to get very bad, esp' if we love our wives or partners. / Cheating is 100% a deal breaker, but if cheating is not a problem Men can take a heck of a lot of bullchit before throwing in the towel. I know, I have lived it.
@@lonewar1
$$$$ Woman Go Backward's And Men Go Forward The Most High Yahuah Elohim Said Women Are Full Of Deception And Messiah Don't Lie People Do That Razzle Dazzle LOL $$$$ 🤑💪😁✌️🤑
@ 1:25 A woman married for 10+ years and has no ideal what men want... A dog would have accidentally learned something about men in that time. This is a woman that is willfully ignorant, and extremely self obsessed. She didn't have a marriage, that was a hostage situation. I can imagine why it ended, especially if it was that self absorbed on both sides. Like she said; She doesn't care what men want. That's literally willfully ignorant behavior. Stay single, keep dating, don't ever get married {my words of advice to her}; You simply do not have what it takes to be a wife for life.
She's gay which is OK but she should have known that before getting married to a man
@@kyleklukas4808 She probably did and still got married. Lots of them do, either from self denial, from familial expectations or more often than anything else, the support factor. Who is going to pay for me to be home or have a part time job? Not likely another woman, but a ignorant to the reality male will...right up until he accepts the new dynamic or he divorces.
@@kyleklukas4808 Why do you say that? Did she say it or imply it in the video?
Probably too many think monogamy and celibacy are the same thing
Facts. The things that men want have *never* changed.
The first woman is clearly a self-absorbed princess. She appeared to be irritated about considering other people's needs. The other 3 talked about being there for each other in the way they need you. Very eye opening
THE FIRST WOMAN WILL BE BUYING A DOG OR A CAT OR BOTH TO KEEP HER COMPANY FOR THE REST OF HER NATURAL LIFE. NO MAN IN HIS RIGHT MIND IS GONNA TOUCH HER BUT A SIMP..............🤔 SHE LEARNS NOTHING FROM LIFE'S EXPERIENCES OBVIOUSLY.......🤔🤔🤔
I thought that was Mr. Rogers!
Her haircut says everything you need to know.
Or a narcissist
@@adrianjohnson9833Exactly. A brazenly malignant narcissistic broken woman
Married 32 years to a real man , three children. He provided and protected as I was at stay home mom.Greatest life ever.Society needs to stop lying to young women and encourage love of men and family.
You should be up on that show preaching truth to the deluded poison they have been fed.
Should a woman always have guys hanging around when their significant other is at work?
@@jsisk117 no
@@UncleKai263 yeah I know but see my old lady keeps trying to tell me that I'm just insecure they are just friends and I need to get over it. I figured I just need some other opinions.
@@jsisk117 set boundaries... If she can't abide by the boundaries, she's doesn't have your best interest in mind.
I was told once , never ever tell your woman anything personal, emotional she remembers things like that and uses it against you.... I'm 52yrs now from London England,I was told this by a Cameroonian brother when I was in the Sudan at the age of 23yrs .
Women are always looking for more... the better deal...
Correct. Day one, she will tell all her close friends. Then it goes into the arsenal for later usage. And if you get even marginally emotional, she will start shopping for a stronger man.
Any woman. Include mothers and sisters there.
That's advice for pick-up culture, but it is important to manage how much one opens up. It's a trade off between health and attractiveness. But ya, friends and brothers are important therapists.
It’s true if you’re just looking for tail. But if you got someone at home you can’t tell literally anything, it’s almost useless to be with someone like that. There is a difference between just being you and not hiding things and crying like a baby because you’re stressed at work. This discussion is usually too reduced to be useful.
Being appreciated, Coming home and not having to Deal with useless drama
I mean, that's pretty much the hammer on the nail for me.
Exactly!
What?NO useless drama from a woman, but , but.......
My father and brother and I used to have a great time together, in the $350,000 house my dad bought at my mother's request... till the SECOND my mother got home from work. Then it was all, "NOBODY APPRECIATES ME!!!" He divorced her, and she got the house.
@@honorb4glory606 I am so sorry to hear that my friend. Although I am not surprised in the least. Women demand constant validation and approval for their every gesture, while men are expected to simply push through adversity. The inequality which feminism has never even approached dealing with.
The woman on the far left gets it. I can tell she understands her man and she understands her role and that she is very grounded. Kudos to her. I’ll bet she stays with him until one of them dies.
She is the bomb. I don't think Pearl understood the nuance of what the woman was saying.
@@steve_etzel Pearl totally missed it and yes, THAT woman is right.
This doesn't mean that a man would want to be psycho-analized, but if he wants to open up, he DOES want to open up because this builds up TRUST and UNDERSTANDING.
First woman ever, who’s on the far left, to get it.. or anything :p
Absolutely she gets it!!
Meanwhile the short haired one on the right - married 10 years clueless about men, no answer. Now she's a Living Answer to what went wrong in her marriage.
They all missed the number 1 thing a man wants in a partner- RESPECT! A woman cannot love you if she doesn't respect you.
And appreciation. And BJs.
“Men want whole hearted love”. No, without respect there is no love.
Just one problem, Respect has to be commanded NOT demanded!
1. Respect
2. Peace
@@petercrane2065yes....unfortunately some women just fall into "the wife " role of complaining no matter how good her man makes her life.
It's why men are walking away
Amazing how the first woman was supposedly at a total loss as to what men really want, and then the three sisters absolutely nailed it.
Seems like she doesn’t want to get it.
She just doesn't want to admit she is wrong and delusional.
Closet feminist.🤣🤣
@@salguodrolyat2594 naw, she's got that written all over her hair do... Let alone that arrogant mug 😂😂
Women are greatly influenced by their female friends. If she would befriend the other three, she could learn a big deal. I think, not all hope is lost on her.
@Anita Adamski that is not what they said at all. They aren't trying to control anything. They are talking about how to support a man.
Women despise men who "open up".
I had a childhood friend pass away back in the 90's and while I was mourning his death, my gf at the time would roll her eyes and say "Are you done yet? Can we focus on me now?"
I dumped her on the spot and gave her 24 hours to move out of my apartment.
It was a valuable lesson on how women have no respect for a man that shows his feelings.
Instant dump. Good for you.
Same situation here. Even made me late to the funeral. I should have left her that day. Instead, kept it going for two more years. I learned a lot.
Plenty of women wouldn’t have reacted this way. She was self centered and immature. Lots of us actually enjoy being able to help others and being selfless makes us fulfilled - unless we end up taken advantage of, never appreciated or reciprocated in the slightest over the years.
Sir, 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Saved your future. Solid move.
The day I took my father in to a care home after 3yrs of looking after him with dementia was the hardest, most painful moment in my life. When we got home, the instant I locked the front door behind me, I collapsed behind it at the bottom of the stairs, I’d been holding it together, knowing that day was going to come. I pretty much laid there for 10 - 15 minutes sobbing, exhausted and broken. The whole time my partner sat there holding my hand and was the one who helped me off the floor. You go through life facing good times, bad times, loss of those we cherish, but you do so together as a team.
Dementia is so cruel. I'm so sorry! thankful you had great support.
that is not true, I challenge a husband to cry regularly in front of his wife and see how that works out
My sisters took my Dad (2018, also had Dementia) to the home, I went along, but stayed somewhat behind to ensure things went to plan. They couldn't get him out of the car, so I had to step in. He started kicking the dash of the vehicle, had to talk him down to get him out of the car and into the home. The man always kept his vehicles in perfect condition. One of the hardest days of my life.
@@NascentCoomer If you can imagine it, and it doesn't break some rule of physics, someone somewhere is doing it, good or evil. I'm sure there are crap women who would hate a man for crying at the decline of his father, but most would be understanding and supportive. I see you used the word regularly, so maybe I'm misunderstanding your post, but I find it entirely believable that this man's wife understood his grief at putting his father into a nursing home.
@@NascentCoomer cry regularly? What sort of trauma warrants that kind of drama? You need a therapist, not a partner.
Feminine, friendly, fit, fertile, and FAITHFUL.
You can keep the fertile. I have no interest in crotch goblins.
Faithful should be 1st. Other than that everything else in right in line.
I would add being of equal intelligence.
MYTH.... THATS almost like trying to find a unicorn... today
You forgot fuckable.
I knew from a painful personal experience that opening up to a woman (as a man in a romantic relationship) who is not your mother, is never a good thing. What I am shocked by is the level of lack of understanding that apparently a lot of women have. One of the women here said "There's a time and place..." . Well, yes, the time and place where a human would normally cry or become vulnerable is at home, and likely in-front of a very trusted friend or very trusted family member. And ideally, a spouse should fall into that category of trusted family member. How is this hard to understand? This isn't just a man thing. It is a human thing.
Well, in my opinion, females do have some degree of empathy but their capability of sympathy has a much higher order in an emotional spectrum. For example, a woman may cry with you while you are crying due to some tragedy (i.e., loosing a father), but she cannot comprehend the pain you go through. Males, has a much high order of empathy by nature, but we lack degree of sympathy females have. As a man, I advise you to never try to make her understand the pain you are suffering (which could also lead to self-pity for man, which I highly suggest you to never fall into it). Show her that you are the emotional and physical rock that waves hit and return to its sea bed. I don't believe its necessarily the crying that makes females loose respect to a man. It is being emotinally and physically weak.
Word
@@SG-xr2bs You clearly haven’t experienced showing any deeper emotions to a woman for her to leave.
What is the alternative? What js the point If you don’t open up and share your most inner thoughts? You might as well be alone
Modern woman are incapable of love. They love what you have to offer (for free ofcorse) but don't care how much effort it costs for you to get it. They are tought they are worth it, its their right. Social engineering is a real nasty thing.
The key fact is she says ME a lot. Tells you everything you need to know.
Ask a man if their wife's mental, emotional, and physical needs are their responsibility, and the vast, vast majority will say yes.
Then, ask women the same question about their husbands, and see what they say.
Never date a narcissist.... When you first start talking, ask things and wait to see if she reciprocates similar questions. Like Hi how are you? If she answers but doesn't ask how you are doing back.... RUN...
"a woman that brings you peace" is nothing short of a miracle. When you find that one, hold on to her for as long as you can.
It is not another person’s responsibility to bring you peace that should be something to achieve for yourself. They can be peaceful though. Peace in an inside job.
Bro really! Peace is so important. Peace, Kindness and Respect. Id move heaven and earth for a woman like that.
Yep, women are vain sh__-stirrers.
@@brendamemela4574 if a man comes home from work and is tired, you can be his peace by not being complacent.
Seriously feel sorry for her husband. That woman is fresh, functional, and empty like a cerial box.
It’s hard to see a woman there
@@agrandesubstituicao short hair, black clothing, sure about everything.
@@Take_The_Ride HMMMM, silver hair and a mouthy attitude. Now *where* have we seen that before? #RIPthegoat #KevinSamuels
Married ten years and learned NOTHING about her husband or men? She said it.
she's transgender
Yup. I cried ONE time in front of a woman that I confessed my love. She knew the worst thing about me. She's the only woman I have ever told that I loved that wasn't my mother or sister. Next thing I know, she moved on and says she wasn't attracted to me. She never once said that until she saw ne cry. Never again will I make that mistake. Women are lying to men and they are lying to themselves when they say they want a man who can cry and vent to them.
I am a big softie for love stories because I have a great one. My wife never made fun of me for it. When we have had a huge fight, or I was grieving, she was there for me. I think you just need to find the right woman.
I mean, you don't want to do that at the outset of a relationship, but part of knowing someone is sharing your world with them over time. If they get put off by that, fine. You're better off knowing they aren't a good match for you.
Yeah, same. I cried in front of a girlfriend twice, got dumped twice. It's awful, the way that women treat their partners. Sorry that happened to you.
Me too bro.
Yep, it’s pretty sad actually. It’s kind of funny (and nuts), that due to feminism many men are able to be more open with each other and the odd time when I’ve broken down sobbing with my close men friends it’s been “ok bro, let it out, talk to me anytime..etc” and then “don’t worry, let it out, then…let’s get a beer..”
My experience with women (girlfriends or ex wife) has been a painful lesson: reaction of disgust, or lack of attraction, or gaslighting, or complicating things when I just need her to be there with me, like hold me and don’t judge. It’s been enraging because I have felt so emotionally emasculated, and alone with their reactions. Like others, I will do my crying on my own now.
It’s as if women are “wired” to only respond to children, and men are to be shamed to just pick up that sword and shield and get back in the fight! There are exceptions of course, where men get the same treatment from male dominated environments (like military boot camps etc.), but I have been surprised how much my emotional shaming experiences are not controlled by men but by the women in my life. Also, “show me your emotions ..” but ONLY the “oh babe I missed you kind…”
My wife was often talking about renovation projects or future travels, and one day, I had enough I told her that every time she was talking about things that she/we didn't have the only thing that I heard was that she wasn't happy with my salary (low 6 fig.) And I f worked more then she was complaining that I didn't spend enough time with her and the kids. So I angrily told her that if she wasn't happy that she needed to find a better paying job or let me work 70hrs a week or find another men, I was fed up with her being relentlessly unhappy.
I also pointed to her that all the Shit we have was for her and living in a wooden box or a castle had no bearing on my happiness, but having a happy family did.
Also, the the reason why I wasn't constantly pointing to her shortcomings wasn't because she was perfect or talking about travels or better/often sex, It was simply because I was focused on what I had and trying to be content with it, rather than underlying all the things, womens, sex that I didn't have. That I two was capable of having the same behavior that she did, and if I did this, she wouldn't put up with this shit as long as I did!
Of course, it was hard for her, but she took notes, adjusted her behavior. Once in a while I still have too remind her that I wouldn't be like her constantly unsatisfied, it forces her to respond that in fact she's not unhappy, it's just a bad habit.
Still with her 33yrs.
Just do the same, don't endure constant dissatisfaction from your girl, just be clear, direct, assertive and the sooner you will do this, the quicker you will find out if she's wife material.
My2centsadvice
The constant lack of of being satisfied with our house gets to me. Keep in mind that we live in an expensive area in California so our house is quite nice as it is. She wanted a new kitchen so we got it done (which was very expensive). Now she wants new windows for the house which will be at least 50k. When I make a big commission at work my goal is to pay off debt and pay some of our bigger bills such as private school for my boys. She just thinks about the stuff that she wants which will never actually
Make her happy when she gets it and will just move onto the next thing. Women are clueless about money and how hard it is to actually get it. I find that to be incredibly frustrating.
@jbp122 that's why we need has men to point out the depth of their problem and point out that the problem is within and not about the outside world or others. People in dirt poor countries have women that are happy with what they have. And if they are religious you can point out that:
Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water (ex: consumerism) will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him (ex: connections, relationship, family or faith if you arereligious) will never be thirsty again.
My2centsadvice
@@rkb4897 you're a wise man.
No, you just got lucky that she was willing to actually listen. Most women won't listen, they'll call you some flavor of ist, phobe, or ism and then rob you blind.
@@jbp122 women have not the art of being happy or content.
They are in the art of finding problems where there are none..
men love peace, women don't love peace.
its simple as that
peace for women is boring.
ALl i can say to you brother...
if the relationship one day fail..its not your fault..but don't ever get into 1 again...
I grew up in a dysfunctional family. Abuse was common. The first time I tried to commit self deletion I was 9 years old. Addiction runs rampant in my family all my siblings have problems with alcohol and or drugs and I myself am a alcoholic and addict. (Clean for 20+ years). I shared some of my childhood trauma with my first wife. Anytime she started losing an argument she would throw what I told her (in confidence) in my face. Plus she told her girlfriends all about my childhood abuse. Never trust a woman with personal trauma.
Similar life experiences here. First attempt at 7 years old, physical and emotional abuse from a narcissistic parent. I was lucky enough to avoid the addiction issues that run on both sides of my family. Surviving is its own reward and sometimes punishment.
CORRECT....so did mine....
all the parents where my kids went to school were all made aware of the 'shortcomings' of my disability/details of my accident at work....after our divorce....
Self deletion? When did that become a synonym for "suicide"? This political correctness bs is trying to sterilize everything so it sounds trivial.
She was just a bad human being…
Yep, women never forget a slight. And they never forget anything that they could use against you in an argument. They'll dredge something up that happened 20 years ago if that's what it takes. You have no business getting involved with a woman like that. It's all about her, and nothing about you.
What do men want? Respect, loyalty, support and companionship. Isn’t that simple?
They have been taught that you're supposed to give them that by the education system and the entertainment industry.
*and sex 🤷🏻♂️🤣
Peace.
Not anymore.
@PEEGIII i looked for a woman that i thought my future children would love. 20 years later im still living a fantasy. Dont even tell people because they would think im making things up.
My wife and I have been together for over 30 years. A few years back I had to put our pet dog down suddenly and it crushed me. When we got home I sobbed like a child. It shocked my wife seeing me in such a vulnerable state. She accepted my openness because it was justified. We now have another dog and life is good. Stay safe everyone
No shame in shedding a tear for your well loved dog I can tell you every time I've shed a tear when all off my past dogs have died
Youre a lucky man.
@@mltiago Really? We don't know that. Wait until 5 years from now when they are in an argument and she lashes out with "You are such a wimp. That is why you turned into a crying little boy when our dog died. I never respected you after that". He will be devastated. There is no time limit to when she will use it against him.
I put down all ours. No fear on thier part. We both cry and kiss my butt if it bugs others. I love hard. Love is not conditional
I see your experience and I'll raise it! I was with my girlfriend for 6 years, then got engaged. 2 years later, planning the wedding for the following year (so 8 years together by that point). My younger sister died of cancer. She was 27. It was devastating. My fiancee left me 2 months later because she "couldn't rely on me emotionally" anymore.
That was about 12 years ago. Took me a year to get myself together. A year or so later I met a Russian girl. We got married within 8 months of meeting each other. We've been married about 10 years, with 2 amazing kids. I will never cry in front of my wife or kids, lol.
That woman on the far left side of the couch is a real one. Shout out to her for knowing how to be a wife and a supportive person!
She was the most mature of all
She must have a high IQ
That's because she's hefty and has to bring a decent personality to the table.
We used to call them divorced women not single mothers. single meant never married. Not a normal situation. Sad the times have changed. Married 36 yrs, 3 kids. Very happy, always supporting my husband.
There used to be a level of shame for bailing on a marriage.
These modern women have no shame.
The woman at 1:30 is spot on about what men are looking for. And a man has to be _very_ selective about what he opens up to a woman about emotionally. Miss that, and she will start shopping for a stronger man. You're allowed 5 minutes of crying when your mother dies. That's it. No other reason.
100% agree... why most women never experience the realness of a true relationship!
The next generation of men have to learn this all over again. Their grandfathers knew this. Somehow their father's forgot or didn't learn it.
I don't believe that, and that definitely hasn't been my experience. There's a time and place. Never showing any emotions just means you're both living in la la land, knowing that shit is going on but choosing to ignore it. Sounds like a recipe for disaster to me
Not just your mother, any siblings, father, and close relatives.
So why... pay for this? YOu know that dont exist, you know you will get a parasite that depends on you, you know if you show any weak she will bail, when problem happens youre on a timer, fix it or se leave and take atleast half, the kid its not yours its hers and she will alienate then.
WHY PAY FOR THAT SH IT PRODUCT?
Her hair cut was Red Flag #1, I can just imagine what her husband had to deal with!
My first thought 😂 !
🤣🤣🤣🤣
The moles!!
Loyalty is huge and if it's broken the relationship crumbles.
And it's nearly impossible to restore. I have yet to see a woman restore trust.
Every one of my buddies who has ever opened up to a woman
it was always a disaster
every time
100% of the time
because she immediately started using that against him in every argument until the relationship died
I was open and honest with my ex-wife. I had a pretty good childhood, but I spent 10 years in the Army, and that does things to your head--some of which aren't very nice. She'd ask me why I have bad dreams, or why I do X and Y a certain way, so I'd explain it to her. I was open about my fears and such.
Now, I've pretty much managed my baggage--it's still there, but I handle it pretty well. I'm a professional-level Stoic, and I was in my 40s when I was married.
So when she was angry, or wanted to hurt me for some reason, or was trying to control me, she'd use all that ammo against me.
Now as I said, I handle my baggage. So it didn't hurt me that she brought that stuff up--what hurt me was the fact that she professed to love me, and yet was obviously trying her damnedest to hurt me emotionally, and to belittle me, and had so little respect for me.
She also had status issues--she had pretensions to high status--her family was wealthy, and she was starting law school. She accused me of "lacking ambition" because, after having spent years in the military, and years in university, and more years in corporate management, and a few years running my own business, I chucked it all and went for a skilled blue collar field with good pay, good benefits, and a high demand. I didn't want to open the latest fad restaurant, or start a fashion company, or go into high finance--I'm too old, too beat up, and too uninterested in that stuff.
And she wasn't the first woman I've had a relationship with who pulled that stuff, either.
But I'm 50 now, and successful in my career, so she'll be the last to be in a position to pull that crap.
I'm not bitter--I feel bad for her, because she'll likely never be happy. And I don't hold it against women in general--I have no problem with women.
But I'm too old and too tired to deal with all that BS that comes with relationships anymore--and lord knows the women who would otherwise be in my prospective pool have plenty of baggage of their own, and I just don't want to deal with that anymore. I don't want to have to start rebuilding my life yet again at this age--so I'm content to just spend my time doing my own thing, and living in my own space, where stuff stays where I put it, and I don't have to coordinate plans or purchases with anyone else.
This. I'm 49 and feel too old to deal with women's behavior. They come to my place and start making up rules. Sorry babe, I worked very hard to be able to chill.
Dude I’m 35 and already tired of women’s bullshit. I’m over the constant bickering & drama brought up like I’m just trying be in peace
Respect mate, I’ve just spent 23 years in the Aus Military and divorced because the job took me away and yes have had medical issues like you as described. I’m financially secure, own my home now. She is trying to get me back, sorry too late, she used those issues against me and left.
I'm 43. The crap I put up with in my younger years make me cringe. I simply can't be bothered anymore. I have things to do and the things I don't want to do... well, good luck trying to make me.
Very well said and agree - thanks for sharing, much appreciated.
In my experience, opening up to a woman gives her the strongest weapon against you. And, she will use it against you without a care in the world.
Totally correct sir. Never...I repeat never share you emotions or fears to your woman unless you want to be tormented by her about your weakness in the future. A certain amount of fear in your women will help her respect you and not claim you are weak.
If you are with such a demon, you should leave.
Yep. Cry means bye. They’ll see you as weak forever more
That applies to men too. Men will use a woman's trauma to shame them. I'm sure women do it too but if they do that's a red flag.
What is the alternative? What js the point If you don’t open up and share your most inner thoughts? You might as well be alone
1.traditional values
2.beauty and fertility
3.peace
4.being a good mother
5.no past trauma
U forgot sex
No past trauma lmao so a unicorn!! And beauty and fertility fades with age! Devote your life to someone who will leave once you age and expect to give you nothing. Sounds great!
@@TheEnigmaticmuse i found it 14 years strong. Try to find a religious partner with traditional values.
@@stealth_mode_8313 I've been married for (doing maths in my head) 18 years. I'm religious. He's not. Both of us have traditional values and trauma. He has more trauma than I do. I'm doing my best to let go of the worry of being left for simply aging. I'm 47. Can't be young forever.
@TheEnigmaticmuse
He won’t leave you, but he will have an attractive mistress. It’s expected because men need sex with a gorgeous gal.
As an older guy, who's almost 60, who's been married more than half my life, being loved and supported over decades of loyalty, is what matters to me. We both made and lost money, we both had and lost looks, we both had and lost sex. Those things actually come and go. It's what you are left with afterwards that you value.
I think if you are lucky you can determine what you value ahead of time.
Bingo.
Good to c someone happy. Enjoy each other❤
I am in my 60’s and have been married 42 years. I could not have said it better myself. There are ups and down, good times and bad, hot times and dry spells. She has been by my side through all of that, alway supportive (and I of her). As you get older you realize what really is important, love and loyalty, the rest is just distractions. However she may have a few more things on her list 😊
@@stewartfm2319 see
They have no concept of what you just posted. As today women know everything about everything. Just ask them. They will tell you they do..
I explained this to a young women why she was 18... She actually listened an invested her money in stocks. Can take care of herself. Avoided the College debt trap. But still has a boyfriend that is goofy as any 20 year old. The only think she wants is Loyalty. While he cares about her. It seem to work for both of them. As she does not abuse him but tells him she loves him anyways. Inpite of his faults and short coming. As they will work it as time passes..Then they really will know each other..
There is a difference between a weak man and a man going through some things. That is when it's the woman's job to comfort him. Not put him down, not try to take his place, not leave him. A woman should always be his soft spot and his peace.
I heard of a man having a breakdown because the pressure of being the foundation and supporter of the family was getting to him. His wife left. What she should have been doing is praying for him.
Praying is what you do when you want to want to help someone without putting in any effort. The rest is good though.
There is no difference in women's eyes anymore. None. Hasn't been for at least the past 20 years and it's getting exponentially worse. Walk away. They don't deserve us.
@LysippeLee I’m just curious as a female, what defines a weak man and a man just “going through things”? I speak for myself needing to know this answer personally. I bring extreme loyalty and honesty it pains me to lie and I’ve never cheated but have been cheated on. To be cheated on is that a weak male? Does addiction issues or should I say priority for addiction over family/wife make you a weak man? Or is that just a man going through something? What about when physical abuse is in the mix and children, what should I feminine woman do in those situations?
I knew a girl who would always let people know how compassionate she was of men and her BF, and how her bf and men in general should open up to women more.
Well, few days later, there she is saying her bf is such a bitch because he shed a tear over a movie scene in which a dog gets dumped by its owner and dies painfully.
People, never believe what women say. Believe their actions.
And only believe their words when they come out when they are in their emotions, because they can only say so much, but almost all their decisions and actions will ultimately be based on how they feel in the moment.
there was a female MMA fighter on Joe Rogan who dumped her MMA boyfriend because he got caught in an arm bar and tapped out "like a bitch" even though she herself had tapped out plenty of times.
Very good advice at 1:28 - "they want a woman that gives them space to be them + they want someone that supports them + a woman that allows him to be the head but still can be the neck that holds him through whatever it is that you both need to go through + someone that's his peace, someone that can bring some form of tranquility into his life when everything feels like it's all over the place or to just actually be at peace and not bring so much like problems or always moaning or plucking things out of thin air to make something happen from past trauma or whatever it is"
The women who was married 10 yrs and could not say what men want, shocked me (if she was being honest).
I have been married since 1980. I am pretty sure my wife could tell you what men want, or at least what her man wants. She saw me through some good times, she saw me through some bad times, as I did her. I did open up to her on occasion but mostly not. I saw and lived through some horrible things in my law enforcement career, when I told her about them she was supportive. Often she heard about them when my cop buddies and I were together with the wives and we cops would be rehashing the stories. On the way home she would say, why didn't you tell me? I would shrug and say, honey you married a man, and we keep some of our stuff locked up. I always felt it is only safe to let it out with those who were there.
Long story this love story I am living, is only possible because we are a team. I never cared how much money she made. I did not care when we were 2 broke college kids, nor afterwards. For the record, she made roughly 3 times what I did the last 7 years before we both retired.
Ladies, your man wants love, support, and peace. A help mate he can count on that won't go bad mouthing you to her family or friends. And guys, you should provide the same.
Loyalty. 100%, that woman knows. Loyalty is one of the most important things on our lists. Someone who seeks peace is a positive important trait as well.
There are different levels of opening up. My dad refused to cry at his own mother's funeral. The only times I ever cried in front of my wife are when we had to put our dog down.
What's so surprising about this clip is that they don't talk over each other.
nothing wrong with showing emotions, actually it's not good if you hide it inside
Showing your emotions is only ok in a few scenarios.
The birth/death of a child
The death of a beloved pet
The death of a wife.
Other than that, any show of emotion is not tolerated. By society. You'll just get told to man up
@@RaifSeverence nope, not in Europe at least. And keeping emotions inside is not good for you anyway
@@polpol1005 Men show their emotions in front of other men.
Because other men won't tapdance on your grave and openly mock you for having one bad day. Other men know what's up. They've been there.
Women don't understand men's hardship, loneliness, and the relentless uphill battles they face every day.
Actually let me partly retract that. I've seen videos where women tried transitioning to men and suddenly felt it all for themselves, rather that just hearing the stories and assuming they were BS. They go into severe depression and often commit suicide.
The world is very cruel towards men.
Women have no clue. None.
And the last thing a man wants after having to fight the whole world all day, is to come home to another fight over nothing.
She just became the enemy living in his house.
Traitor.
The reason they weren't talking over each other was the topic was focused on them, reflected entirely on the fact that women are mean, vindictive creatures that will hurt you any way possible. Each woman was trying to minimize their time in the spotlight. They couldn't even say "not all women" or give a personal example of when they didn't do that. They were looking in a mirror and saw their own dark sides.
10 years and admits she didn’t learn a single thing. Wow
The lady speaking at 2:35 nails it for me. As a man I want a ride or die loyal woman who admires me and believes in me. She's not going to leave me when I stumble and that gives me the security and strength to persevere no matter what. It's the ultimate motivator for me.
I'm lucky, my wife is exactly like this. She's seen me hit a real low before and she knew I would come through it, no doubt. Now whatever is mine, is hers also.
5 minutes in nailed it for me
10 years and didn't learn much of anything?? Woah.
I was married for 3 and a half years, learned a lot about myself, about my ex wife, and a lot about that lifestyle of being married, and all the things she taught me.
But 10 years and you're still clueless? Either all you are is buried in your work or you're completely self involved even at home. Probably both. Who would want to stick around that?
She was deflecting with humor, but it was still disgusting and shocking to watch.
Imagine asking a retired professional athlete for advice about their sport and they say, "Haha you've really put me on the spot I've never thought about it before. I'm no longer a professional so I must not be very good, right?"
@@TrenchcoatJesus Fantastic analaogy 👍
FACTS. I learned a ton from a lot of relationships, I thought that was such a weird answer too. Line she never considered that before "what do OTHER ppl want".
Let's be real for a moment.
Women do not necesarily have to learn anything.
All they have to do is say a man was abusive or narcissistic and everyone believes them, pities them, gives them " a chance at the happiness they deserve" and is then confused wile she failed again. LOL
She simply didn't care about what a man wants.
The woman on the end couldn’t think of one thing a man would potentially want because it’s not something she’s ever thought about in the first place.
Total narcissist
But the woman on the apposite end it a total Queen. Once in a lifetime girl
All you need is one💍
When my husband and I married 35 years ago, I was broken and confused about life. His Mother passed when he was a young 12 year old boy, and he had to become a young man sooner than expected. Before we were married, I told him we could always share my mother, and until she passed away June 19th, 2015, she was everything to us all. My Mother always told me, "You teach a man how to treat you. You be kind to him and treat him with respect. Pray for him and with him. Love him and make him feel that his home is his castle. Hug him, tell him you love him, then show him by doing things for him that's unexpected. Be the woman he looks at with love in his eyes, mind, and heart. Nurture his soul. In order to heal, you have to come to terms with your past failures and shortcomings, then get yourself together to be the best version of you.
I have heard a lot of testimonies from men about stuff they dealt with over the course of their lives (some of it rather horrifying and you would have no idea just by looking at them). They have baggage they bring into the marriage. If/when they start to open up about it and their spouse is dismissive or chooses to weaponize it, that destroys the relationship so fast.
Even when they dont weaponize it, they often cant handle it. Like they dont like how men express it, so they have to make theirbman "learn" how to express themselves. Women have to stop changing men and learn to appreciate them
I can relate.. Happened to me.. You can't believe the EVIL a woman can be..
This happened to me exactly. I woke up from a war dream with a start and my wife asked me what’s wrong. I told her it was just a dream and that I miss my buddies.
She has been going around bringing that shit up every chance she can. From friendly conversations with friends to arguments, to medical conditions at the doctors office. Keeps telling everyone I have PTSD without regard to my request to stop.
@@hieug.rection1920 Leave for a while see how she likes that
Everyone has heard the expression "Don't argue with stupid people. They will bring you to their level then beat you with experience." Same concept "Don't get emotional with a woman. They will bring you into an emotional argument and they have a hell of a lot more experience than the man"
They talk a lot but say very little. Props to Pearl for being far more patient than I would ever be.
Blah, blah, blah, blah for 5 minutes. "So you mean loyal." Yeah. Blah, blah, blah, blah for 5 more minutes. "So you mean pure." Yeah. Jesus. Get to the point. This is another thing men want. Part of being his "peace" is getting to the damn point and shutting up otherwise.
@@ispep8882 Damn right!
That may be how you guys feel towards things, but clearly not all men are like you
Yes, the million words...too men turns into nagging. That's why women complain about us not listening. It's because, your talking to here yourself. I got the message in one minute, after that. I'm not listening. I have my direction already. Added words are nonsence unless I ask.
You think thats a lot, wait till you have a SO in the house 24/7. You will train your ears to hear that beautiful sound of a the cricket that you hated years earlier. That cricket will be your joy.
Never cry in front of your woman. Most women will immediately lose respect for you the second she sees you in a vulnerable state. It's a lesson most of us learn the hard way.
Amen. And never tell her your most vulnerable secrets. Just DON'T. Take it to your grave, have a male friend you can trust for that. NOT a woman. No matter how much you love eachother and how perfectly matched you are.
ANY person that would do that is a worthless nobody!
You’re with the wrong women. I’ve had a lot of girlfriends over the years and cried at times with most of them. One tried to use it against me and she had giant red flags that I stupidly ignored in the beginning.
Loyalty, affection, lack of conflict, calm discussion of issues. Sex isn't the most important thing, but having someone to help take care of the day to day.
1:29 I believe that's the first time on Pearl's show that I've heard any of these women say "I THINK", and that puts her ahead of the others. And she was actually very reasonable and fair with whatever she said.
I just dated a lawyer who made $25k a year more than me. She was constantly broke and her credit was garbage. I paid the bills and am never broke.
What do men want? Speaking for myself I just want my woman to be nice to me . At my age , everyone has baggage. Just be nice and loyal.
Just be nice💯
Get someone younger without baggage.
@@boobo No one is devoid of baggage. No one.
@@boobo she was 41 I’m 53
Just to show you that most women are spenders of money not savers and investors of money.. everyone isn't Oprah Winfrey
Someone who is just nice and comfortable to be around. No complaining . We dont want to hear what you don't like. Tell us what you enjoy. Simple.
Imagine someone telling you that you cant voice your feelings or emotions because she might leave you or judge you.
TO ALL MEN READING THIS: Any woman making you feel bad for communicating your emotions, crying, or anything related to expressing how you feel... is not worth a second of your time and should be immediately put into the trash bin of your mind were they have always belonged.
I'm thinking a good shit test would be to tell her something very personal that's a complete lie.
Then when she throws it in your face as weakness, tell her that it was a lie and she failed the test.
There's the door. Get out.
@winder2793 -- This is just how women are built. 100%. If you want a friend, get a dog.
@@protorhinocerator142- your playing with fire kid. testing & liying to your 'so' is a bad idea. you either want to earn their respect by giving them respect or you're not the right person for them and the relationship will struggle.
@@Mahnamahna1100 Women invented the shit test. They do it all the time. Men need a response. Women weaponize men's emotions. Men don't do that. This is fair.
This goes to show none of these women have a clue what men want. Just one thing, (well, two 😂) but the main thing is respect. Respect us for choosing you, respect us for protecting you, respect our feelings (yes we have them, but don’t burden you with them), respect us for providing for you, respect our loyalty to you by returning that loyalty. Just having that respect makes us have faith in the relationship.
N.B. Never disrespect your man unless you are happy for him to leave you. (And vice versa guys!)
I can see why he left her
Would be great to have a women be loyal and help me thru my struggle. Too bad it aint like that anymore.
That should be the bare minimum. If she can't so that then she can't be with me.
At least we know what to expect now even if it's brutal. Before alternative media this kind of information was not common knowledge. False hope can be dangerous
She is wise. I have known my wife since we were 9, I am 43 now. We have not so much as argued, because, we understand each other and respect each other. She is my world, and I hers. We love being around each other. I couldn't imagine saying or doing anything to hurt her, it just doesn't exist with us. We can literally tell how the other person is feeling just by being around each other, without words and we both know how to lift the other up. We don't have negativity in our lives because we appreciate who we have. We been poor, we been broke, we rose together. It is about paying attention. If i notice she is out of something, i don't care if its 3 am, i go out and get it for her. She will never do without anything. She has no wants. I keep that list checked. She does the same for me.
There are people men can open up to , and it’s definitely NOT women.
Men can open up to the respected men of their bloodline and men of his close circle.
Never show your women vulnerability… she will lose respect for you , and the effect is irreversible.
Damn, that's so insanely cynical. Sure, some women will take advantage of vulnerability, but most women respect and appreciate that kind of honesty if it's delivered from a place where the intent is to develop a closer bond with their partner. I suspect you might be conflating the tendencies of needy, whiny men who tend toward co-dependence (who do indeed turn women off) with confident, competent men who are comfortable having an intelligent conversation about their own shortcomings (who women tend to treat with the utmost respect).
@@CosmicIceCream No women expect men to be a dependable strong rock like granite but when he shows emotional weakness he becomes like sand rather than granite.
@@muzzmac160 Women respect men who respect themselves and have standards. If you want to be respected, you have to make it clear you won't be treated otherwise and walk away from toxic women who'd do something like this. In fact your entire assertion presupposes that the man somehow needs the woman more than she needs him when precisely the opposite is true, or at the very least they need each other equally.
And it's not all women, either.
Im with you there. Now there is a difference between vulnerability and being emotional. I mean if you need to cry and or explode, go for a walk in the woods and get it done, instability has no place in the home. Though you can speak about things you have gone through and overcome. What you learned and how you persisted. Though if you dealt with it then it wont piss you off is she tosses it out there in a fight. If you get triggered, get therapy. When trying to sort your thoughts seek men.
@@CosmicIceCream most women and probably a huge % of the population want a strong man and showing weakness is a critical mistake for long term. It's only a matter of time till she loses interest.
My mom died 3 yrs ago and i was devastated from it. I had a relationship back then and the only thing that i could think of was talk it with her. She Left after 3 weeks cause i was in too much pain mourning and crying she said i wasn't paying enough attention to her anymore and to her problems and her feelings basically telling me i was selfish....
From that point on i decided to never ever talk about my real painful emotions whith a woman.
You also dodged a bullet. Imagine marrying such a person, investing years of your life, only to have her decide she deserves more, leaves, and destroys your life in the process.
Oh my word. That's a devastating loss. 3 weeks is hardly any time to move through the grief cycle. Completely useless and selfish woman. However, not all women are like that. I, for one, will die for my man. 52 now, known him since 14, married at 23 and we could write each other's diaries. We trust each other because we have proven our loyalty and reliability. There has to still be women of honor out there for you.
@@kpage592 You're next to impossible to find today, you're both lucky to have each other.
@@petebrown6356 i do really hope you find someone if that’s what you want. Still shocked by that woman’s cruelty.
@@kpage592 Words. Empty words... Prove your word true or shut the fuck up.
The "opening up to women" point Pesrl is spot on. Women mis understand this.
The situation is that women want to feel like they have an emotional connection. However, that is not a man opening up, as this leads women to loose respect for him.
@ Dnomyar Akunawik
Sure sweetheart.
Did pearl lose weight?🤷♂️
I have been in 5 serious relationships in my life over the past 15 years, I have only truly opened up to 1 person, my fiancé, and when she never used it against me I knew she was the right person for me, but over that time I have also realized that most women WILL use what you say against you, even if it is an emotional childhood trauma that you shared with them.
Fit, feminine, beautiful, faithful and inspirational.
That's what a woman needs to bring to the table for a man to want a long term commitment to her.
None of these things are limited to one way to achieve. Achieving these things by a woman is unique for each man.
Those traia IS more and more in extiction dude
Fit faeminine IS Very hard nowadays kkk
When u find a woman at least fit and feminine most of time she IS 3o4 kkkk
Loyalty, respect, love and peace is what we want, it’s not hard or complicated.
Exactly, if you are married to someone who will use your own words against you. That tells you what kind of person she is.
No matter what these women say. It comes back to something that benefits THEM !
And men. We are *all* egocentric.
@@MixUpTheVideos nah.
Yeah you are right about that. It’s why they file for divorce more often because, it wasn’t enough for them and they always look for better
Marshall, we're not all like that (this is Mrs. Rick speaking).
@@Beanie3500 And good luck to them. Women with kids in their 30's are going to play hob finding a good man. The pool has done shrunk, ladies.
Just support him when he's down he will be stronger when you're there to help him.
I would never open up to a woman. If I need advice I speak with close male friends - that way I get an honest response and being men, it is never held against you.
Somehow I got it beat into my head from a young age that life can not only be a challenge but outright dangerous. Maybe all the talk of world wars, the depression, oppressive political ideologies, dangerous criminals etc etc. did that. I look at potential mates quite strongly as a team mate in the struggle to keep the wolves at bay. That means she has to be sensible and industrious and have a bit of the feminine that's so pleasing. I think I just described my mother.
That last line of your paragraph killed me 😂
That kanye jacket and justin beeebeer hair is not helping her chances. But she knows thst. She wouldnt even change her look..no chance she is going to change her values or personality
I agree. She's probably going to be single for the rest of her life.
What men want: do not get fat, sex, loyalty, food, and for you to know when to shut the heck up. Is that too simple to understand?
The lady in the white blouse with the green lizards on it has some very valid points.
Agree. She nailed it.
Loyalty and not having to question it, peace and tranquillity at home.
These women truly have no clue what they offer to a man to make the relationship better...
Fascinating...
I'm 70; wife & I have been married 37 years (2nd marriage for both) and raised 6 daughters. Our observation is that men quietly desire aporeciation / gratitude. And, of course, that means that the woman needs to actually feel and express gratitude to him.
The moment you tell a woman you love her, she mentally starts looking for a man who doesn’t. She’ll use you until she finds that guy.
I shall never a love a woman in general. They all leeches
Yep
Truth my brotha
😢
You’re doing something wrong, if that’s your experience.
I’m 57 years old, married 15 and together 20 years. I have 2 best guy friends, all 3 are like brothers, we discuss nearly everything good and bad. I can be my 100% self with these guys. It’s been like this for over 30 years. T.his is my second marriage and I met my now wife, one of my must haves was I need someone to work with, and I can now say she didn’t like the word “WORK” mainly because it wasn’t romantic. 20 years on we’re still working together, still in love and more importantly I can still be myself. I have 2 daughters and I I’ve them, there’s two types of girls. One you take home to meet your parents and the others you leave to the streets. Who determines parents or street is the women.
I was married for 14 years and together for 18. She honestly knows nothing about me or the way I am.
was that a marriage worth having?
@@Maarten8867 it wasn’t, that’s why I left.
I feel the same way about my ex,
I dont really open up to my lady about my feelings, but I do try to explain to here about the person I am and why I think the way I do. Majority of the time, she just tells me I'm weird or really doesnt want to hear it, (body language). This is present day. Really considering walking away after 6 yrs. When I brought the issue up, which she told me she wants me to tell her if she does something I dont like, she goes on this, "well you do this this and this.. ", instead of addressing what I just said. 44yrs old. Tired...
@@oriusx I’m 43 and I have my peace. I won’t ever sacrifice that for anyone again.
If she was married for 10 years and didn't learn anything about her husband that is the exact reason why he left.
Interview him next!
Its really simple ladies. Full stomach, empty balls, peace and quiet. Those are the 4 pillars of male satisfaction and sanity.
true. but the way i experience it, its those 4 pillars that women dont seek for themself and feel like "its work" when they have to do that "for" the men and thus blame you, even without words, for not beeing like them, not beeing in the same need, that they have. they know as a men, youre different, but they dont want you to be different and what guys want, often, is very primitiv in their point of view
My last relationship the girl accused me of being predatory for telling her I liked her. I was berated for being too happy in the relationship. I was told I was ridiculous for being sad when she went back to the West Coast. Any mild sort of frustration I had was turned into wild mood swings. The entire time she was telling me to be open with her. Women do not want their men to open up to them period.
You can blame her for the way that she is, but you have to hold yourself responsible for even being in a relationship with her.
@doublepromo8240 Yeah after that one I'm done with "hot & crazy,"
@@almighty_cthulhu as long as you learned from it. I've been there and done it. Learned my lesson the hard way, too, but lesson learned.
These are not women, these are narcissists
After your first line the other things should have never had a chance to happen.
A faithful wife (rare these days), peace & quiet aka: no drama, occasional home cooked dinner & regular sex would make me very happy. I've been married & divorced twice because none of these happened
Stay single
Most women are liars
No one mentioned respect. Lots of men leave women because they feel disrespected. Lot's of women, at first, idealize their man. After they find out he's just a human being like lots of other men, they become disappointed. Once that happens they lose respect and that's something they can't hide.
As much as most of these women seem genuine and sincere, and I believe they are, I think there's a subconscious thing, if their partners were vulnerable to them they'd pull back, even if it wasn't a conscious thing.
I love my fiance, and as wonderful as she is...she re-solidified my stance that you can't open up or share things that have hurt you in the past. Never met a woman that really values a man opening his heart and sharing his pain without at least once backhanding him for it later on. I can't speak for other guys but even my mother proved that to me (I'm adopted and my birth mother was the same way). Nope, the armor stays on. Our elders need strength, our partners need strength, our children need strength, our coworkers and acquaintances need it...hell even our pets need strength. Let a single person see weakness and that's it. The quote "Only women, children and animals are loved unconditionally" is the truth I say with anonymity. There are MANY who understand this to be true
sorry to hear that, because many women are different and you can open to them.
Don’t call your husband or your wife your partner. They are your spouse, they aren’t a partner in crime or business partners. A spouse is much more than a partner.
I never found myself wanting to open up to my woman. Talk? Sure. Tell her about something I did that I was proud of etc, sure. Looking for an attaboy from her? Sure. Telling her my true feelings? Not a chance in hell.
Half the time i caught it fir wanting an atta boy... God forbid uf u repeated myyself over simething i said 10 years ago but i better not say a peep if she does it
I don't want atta boy, i want them to know who they're dealing with so she doesn't waste MY time and if your those: mess with me & you won't want to see my emotional side because it might be something disturbing, she will never ask to talk about your emotions... Ever! 🤣
😂🎉
Yup. Anything you say can and will be used against you at a later date...I Want A Lawyer! ...I mean nothing babe.
I’ve had a couple cool chicks who never used it against me.
A couple out of triple digits.
It happens. There are a couple / few.
The rest freak out, watch you like a circus freak, or start leaving immediately.
It’s a shocker when a ultra supportive women freaks out when she sees a imperfection in you.
You’d think the opposite but any chick needs to be tested on this one.
My wife and I have been married for 51 years. You have to be friends. You can't stay in lust forever LOL. You absolutely have to trust each other, and loyalty is paramount. Forget needless drama and chaos that add nothing to a positive relationship. Never lie, the truth might hurt once for a little while but a lie hurts forever. Be willing to forgive and be willing to be forgiven, then move on. Never bring up a problem without offering at least one solution. Talk about what you like...and what you don't like. Everyone changes over time, viewpoints, attitudes, etc. If you don't feel the same about something anymore, let your partner know. ALWAYS have each other's back. Be the one they can count on if everyone else in the world is against them. Be honest without secrets. Little surprises are appreciated. Try to be helpful even if you aren't sure exactly how to help. Good Luck.
Even with the best of intentions, women can't help themselves from using EVERYTHING you say against you. When you are opening up to her, I honestly believe that she truly wants to help and support you. The problem is that women are so emotional that later on, when they are angry, they can't control their emotions and will use anything to hurt you. They can't help it. Therefore, why would I tell anything to my wife that I know will be used against me in the future?
As a man I would put respect and being desired above feeling loved. Love is important, but I think we want to be as much her world as she wants us to be her world. Wives respect your husbands. Husbands love your wives.
I remember one time I was having a hard time at work, I told my wife, she stressed out about it, and ended up going to hospital, I ran her home at 4am,
So the next day I had all the same problems, except without any sleep,
I never told her ever again.
Tears can and should be shed by Men. At the loss of a close loved one. Tears of Joy. These happen in life. The more extraordinary the situation the more acceptable it is. But a Man who tears up at the drop of a hat? No. There is definitely a need for stoicism and emotional control for Men in normal life.
In my life, between my wife and I, there was a miscarriage pregnancy. After the immediate risk to her life was past the enormity of what happened, the loss of a child, hit us. We held onto each other for dear life and cried for that child we would never hold. I couldn't tell you how long that lasted but it was desperately needed by Both of us. There is no shame in such a moment.
AMEN
I appreciate your transparency. The pain is blinding. I wish the best for you and your wife.
@@Tim99GT Thank you. That was many years ago now. We were blessed with four healthy vibrant children. Most of whom are now adults. But every August comes a week and a day that only my wife and I share a sadness few of our closest friends and even our children know about. So many couples have stories like ours. And it's all mostly out of sight and out of mind.
Jesus dude, I am crying over that
Can you imagine how much women could learn if they read all these excelent comments?
By the way, I have a really loyal and emotional dog. If I'd need it, I tell her my profound emotions. I happy with my life, have great parents, son and daugther and still supporting them all my time and also have time for myself. Best time ever for me.
I’m a guy and I totally agree with the woman’s talking about loyalty as far as the dog goes I love my dog and I take excellent care of him!
I have never heard that expression before, but it makes perfect sense, and I love it. "Let the man be the head and let the woman be the neck."
Let the man be the head and women GIVE him some head once in a while.
It's always interesting how they dance around without ever getting to the actual real point. Your spouse *should* be the person you can open up to. And generally, I see husbands trying to be supportive of their wives emotional needs. If a wife loses respect for her husband because he is human and has feelings or moments of weakness, that says more about her than him. Its a clear sign that she doesn't understand the weight of the responsibility that husbands bear. If she weaponizes that sacred trust, that says more about her than him. Men know that physical wounds heal, even if they leave scars, but emotional wounds last much, much longer. We are not unaware of this simple fact, hence the reason we do not allow ourselves to be vulnerable with someone who will attack our weaknesses. It's like when your sparring coach rings your bell because you let your guard down and got complacent. We learn quickly. Generally speaking male friends have nothing to gain by hurting you, and nothing to lose by telling you the truth. When that's true for your spouse, she is your best friend.
Very masculine take. Women don't think that way.
My father died of cancer, then about a year and a half later my mom died of a pulmonary embolism, 2 weeks after that my wife left me cause I was too depressed.
Never show weakness.
That wasn't weakness, her leaving was. She didn't know how to support you or didn't want to. Either way, you're clearly better off without her. Sorry about your parents, many blessings to you
Man.... Sorry to hear this... I dunno if it's don't show weakness, it's more like don't date losers like that. I cried for 2 weeks when my mom died and my wife was there for me. When I lost my first job I cried as well and she held me. You need to find a better breed.
she missed the part she agreed to that says "for better or for worse" or however it goes in english... you stand side by side in the bad times and you celebrate in the good times...
@@those1kidds Yep. I lost my dad about 14 years ago and cried for him. I just put my dog down last week and cried for him too. My wife cried with me both times.
Your weakness left you when she left. You dodged a bullet my friend i know someone that went through that same exact thing and met the love of his life afterwards. God bless you rest in paradise
The one woman said "it is about listening to understand, not listening to respond.". Wise words,
Watching the first 60 seconds, I can see why he left her…
The disrespect of my ex wife is and was appalling, I am guilty of many things in my marriage,I often thought if I did more it would have made things better,now I know there’s nothing I could have done that would have stopped her from undermining me etc,if we never spoke again I wouldn’t care.
It's simple..
We want a lady on a street, cook in a kitchen and sIut in a bedroom.
I finally found a woman that has a mindset like this. When I have a tough day, she will listen to my problems, but if I whine too much, I can see her get annoyed and start to shut me down. You need to have a good balance of a supportive partner without turning her into your mommy you can go cry to at any time. I do a lot for her and she thanks me all the time for it. It makes me feel valuable and appreciated instead of like a slave always trying to please my master. Just simply being appreciated and recognized is all most men need and for the woman to not feel entitled to special treatment without also earning it. If you sit around all day creating problems to fight about because you're bored or "want to see the passion" of your man upset, you are probably a psychopath.
Yes, we don't care if you're broke all we care is that you stick with us while we're building a future for us both.
Incredible to see there are women who still understand when they deserve it all.
Poor guy, he had to be married to this lesbian male impersonator.
I wonder why so many women "at a certain age" choose this styling. Over 40 the majority looks like that.