I wasn't expecting to put on my tux at 4 in the morning, but there's the handies, and so here we are. EDIT: Holy shit I was not ready for that intro. Conor you legit have a good voice
He really should have been nominated for artistry alone, but I doubt would have gotten the Saparbek. I'm not convinced any of those fouls were deliberate, brilliant as they were. Intent matters, and with Chandler you never have to ask, "did he mean to do that?" The answer is yes.
🎵 Opening (0:00 - 3:20) Intro song and banter Overview of award show structure 📋 Generic Boring Awards (3:20 - 40:30) 7:46 Fighter of the Year 10:54 KO of the Year 13:37 Submission of the Year 20:35 Fight of the Year 🎯 Weird Stuff Awards (40:30 - 1:45:00) 32:54 Fight Like This Person Award 41:40 Worst Fight 50:35 Best Bad Fight 55:50 Athletic Cheeta Award 1:02:15 Worst KO 1:08:40 Worst Vibe 📊 Strategy Section (1:45:00 - End) 1:45:20 Best Game Plan 1:56:40 Strategies for Losers 2:02:30 Hey That Worked Award 2:15:45 Worst Brain Thinking 2:31:20 Most Improved 2:39:15 Most "Technical" 2:45:30 Post-Fight Rationalizations
I have Dracula Untold muted in the background while listening to this and fighting in that movie is probably what most sub-casuals expect in MMA. Whenever I show an MMA fight to people the first question they ask is still “is this real or fake?”
I had a little daydream imagining the handies in the style of an On Cinema at the cinema Oscar Special. The show begins with Zane Simon telling us that he is now the host of Heavy Hands, that Connor was arrested for selling vapes full of amphetamines to children. 20 minutes into the show, a drunk Connor storms into Zane's room, pepper sprays him, and takes control of the show. The remaining run time is Connor playing Q Anon videos shared by Bryce Mitchell and ranting, until the police show up and he flees the scene
18:14 As somebody who mostly grapples but crosstrains a bit in mma and boxing, Conor is totally right that pure grappling doesn’t have a wide overlap with mma. Most of the bottom game is really dangerous and you ought to emulate Oliveira or Pantoja, where if you’re on the bottom you should sweep or submit just to get up and keep the action going; it’s difficult without strikes to drive the pace from the bottom, and with strikes it’s extremely dangerous unless you’re using something like deep K guard or really hard knee reaps to make strikes difficult to land. This isn’t a knock against jitz though, because you could say the same about kickboxing or wrestlings overlap with MMA; they’re all contextual and limited by the existence of other techniques and that’s what makes this sport so cool. Edit: I TAKE IT ALL BACK CONOR HAS NO IDEA WHAT HES TALKING ABOUT, x guard and buggy chokes are not trendy at all what is this guy smoking - from what I can tell, the biggest trend in BJJ rn overwhelmingly is pretending to wrestle lol
Hey man, my vibe was correct even if my terminology was abysmal lol. Let's be honest, BJJ is practically on some chess shit when it comes to giving every single position it's own distinct name; not like boxing and wrestling. "duuuhhh we just call it a foot sweep."
@ when your sport is a Venn diagram between people on the spectrum and people who are stupid high you gotta be specific! NOW if you’d said reverse X to far hip ashi or the outside buggy I’d buy what you’re selling
A great way to cap the year off, I much appreciate you fellas making this show. Next year you should invite Ralek Gracie to come on as a special musical guest, and him and Connor can open the show with a duet of G in a Gi
As a pretty good grappler myself, I have faith in Phil’s theory that we will eventually see more weird subs and trends. So much of what has evolved in bjj over past 8 years has basically never been attempted in mma and it is because nobody knows how to do it well and not that it isn’t suitable for mma or doesn’t work. A lot of these things have their place (some things will never be very relevant of course) De la riva and k guard system have pretty good leg frames to keep a standing opponent off of you from ground and pound (and allow upkicks) and also centre around taking the back or getting back bodylock. Both Charles oliveira and DJ have both attempted babybolo from DLR guard briefly and were safe while doing so. Both of these guards can also lead into the 5050 which is one of the best leg entanglements for mma. Ryan hall is a bit of a meme but he really did have a 5050 system which protects you from ground and pound and puts the opponent in a very complicated situation that is very hard to disengage from. Ilia Topuria never got put in 5050 and this fight is a bad example of how to apply this (it has its place and shouldn’t be entire gameplan) X guard I see as less useful (because of lack of frames unlike k guard) but mcgregor successfully used it against nate and can save your ass against standing ground and pound from someone like shavkat. Most fighters never attempt it because they put zero time into it in favour of the more conventional methods. Leg attacks are basically the only thing that works well from guard in bjj these days and mma guys never even try. And when I do see them try they usually kinda suck at them. I think a few high profile wins will see more fighters making the risky investment of training time into these positions
I like how they're very confident on what the Nick Lentz vs Charles Olivera award was when I think the two years before last year it was just a Charles Olivera fight and one that just reminded them of Nick Lentz vs Charles Olivera
I'm a BJJ head and have been listening for years now lol, and tbh I think BJJ is still valuable for creating movement opportunities to get back to your feet. Also MMA fighters, as a general rule of thumb, overreact a lot to being put in leg entanglements, that's why attacking the legs is such a good way to create enough space to get back to your feet. Unfortunately too many fighters get tunnel vision on the leglock, and bjj guys who transition to MMA are often too focused on playing guard instead of incorporating wrestle-ups into their games and this is the case in jiu jitsu as well. Tbh BJJ is still in the early stages of recognizing how valuable the wrestle up is, I hope that more people will start incorporating it into their jiu jitsu like how Demian Maia did
Singular jiu jitsu fan here: I would say most of the high level guard work these days does not have a ton of applicability in MMA or it's just designed to let you get up anyway. Combine that with the folk style/judo hybridization meta and you have like five viable submissions coming from the front head or back. You either have to snatch something up off the front headlock or get to their back where you're so dominant that it can be hard to fight off and everyone has adequate leg defense. Levi Jones is the current flag carrier for high level no gi guard work in the lighter weight classes (aka the only ones that matter because heavyweight is dogshit in every combat sport I swear to God) coming out of CJI and that is very much a BJJ-only guard.
@heavyhands1383 yeah I don't think you were too far off. I'm sure there will be a meta shift again at some point. Personally, the current meta is what I've always enjoyed anyway so it's been fun to see. Everyone loves seeing wild shit happen in the cage, though. Khabib's triangle setup on Gaethje became one I use often
I love being able to listen to Heavy Hands and my unpopular opinions being vindicated. Literally let a sigh of relief out when you pointed out how ugly the Shara Bullet double-backfist ko was... You guys are just missing one thing. It doesn't matter if you can't see your opponent when you're practically blind anyway 😂.
Great show as always, love the handies, especially the glue factory segment You guys gotta stop hating Du Plessis so much though, his shit works in MMA Also, the redhead Russian pirate is obviously a trash hunan being, but c'mon a double spinning backfist KO is crazy impressive, it's not a bad KO. The Holloway one is kind of dumber despite being insanely cool
"That's true. I don't want to give it to him again anyway. I'm sick of even having to think about Colby Covington at this point. So. Hhhh. Uhhh. Tai Tuivasa...
Carlos Leal slapped the shit out of Rinat Fakhretdinov, had a great game plan and got shamelessly robbed but no one cared bc it was the first fight on the card. Poor guy couldnt even get a Handy ™ nomination
In future years, you guys might have fun adding two separate Jamahal Hill awards, one for saltiest cope and the other for biggest keyboard warrior or try-hard. Remember when Paul Craig wrecked Hill’s arm and he was super chill about it? This year he became the guy who took three Ls against Pereira, first in the ring; then post-yawn with the “maybe he just woke up from UFC 300” quip; and finally when he tried to start fake static in Pereira’s gym but refused to spar. Mmm. Mmm.
all hail the greatest show on earth cause no zane simon, jk the other show is also the greatest show on earth, cause no british guy. jesus christ the fucking hilarious intro. give the man a fucking grammy jesus that is funny LOOOOOOOOL. real comedy show level funny. that could have been on the daily show or snl or something
Finally 2025 can start
lmao that intro. it was worth the wait
I was not prepared for Conor serenading us.
I'm absolutely floored 30 seconds in
I thought I was so ready for the Handies but holy shit was I not prepared for that intro. Bravo.
Conor, your voice is like a combination of fergie and Jesus.
I wasn't expecting to put on my tux at 4 in the morning, but there's the handies, and so here we are.
EDIT: Holy shit I was not ready for that intro. Conor you legit have a good voice
Thanks!
He's just going his best Seth macfarlane impression here. Lol
How did Weidman not get best cheating? He won with a three eye poke combo then celebrated like he had just cured cancer.
He really should have been nominated for artistry alone, but I doubt would have gotten the Saparbek. I'm not convinced any of those fouls were deliberate, brilliant as they were. Intent matters, and with Chandler you never have to ask, "did he mean to do that?" The answer is yes.
As soon as I heard the intro, I knew where that extra week went
Definitely heard, "Mackenzie Glutes" and thought it was a reference to this Saturday's main event.
It’s not? Lol
You heard what you wanted to hear, you dog
Mackenzie Goops
That Ragin' Al post fight speech is eternal
all timer intro
the glue factory segment is hilarious
Dulcet tones and fists on domes, this did not disappoint
30 seconds in and i’m hoping this entire show is a musical
Was that ole blue eyes singing in the intro?
🎵 Opening (0:00 - 3:20)
Intro song and banter
Overview of award show structure
📋 Generic Boring Awards (3:20 - 40:30)
7:46 Fighter of the Year
10:54 KO of the Year
13:37 Submission of the Year
20:35 Fight of the Year
🎯 Weird Stuff Awards (40:30 - 1:45:00)
32:54 Fight Like This Person Award
41:40 Worst Fight
50:35 Best Bad Fight
55:50 Athletic Cheeta Award
1:02:15 Worst KO
1:08:40 Worst Vibe
📊 Strategy Section (1:45:00 - End)
1:45:20 Best Game Plan
1:56:40 Strategies for Losers
2:02:30 Hey That Worked Award
2:15:45 Worst Brain Thinking
2:31:20 Most Improved
2:39:15 Most "Technical"
2:45:30 Post-Fight Rationalizations
Best part of the year unironically. Love it.
Amazing intro haha
impressive singing performance honestly
That intro was incredible!!
That intro had me dancing like I had a cocktail in one hand lol great job guys! 🍸
Where was the "how many times do we have to teach you this lesson old man award" for old dudes winning to survive Connor?
I have Dracula Untold muted in the background while listening to this and fighting in that movie is probably what most sub-casuals expect in MMA.
Whenever I show an MMA fight to people the first question they ask is still “is this real or fake?”
Its the best time of the year when the handies drop.
Thank you Connor!
Live From the Glue Factory. Connor is truly the Frank Sinatra of our times. If not the one we deserve
But not the one we need right now
This is better then I could have ever imagined it would be
I had a little daydream imagining the handies in the style of an On Cinema at the cinema Oscar Special.
The show begins with Zane Simon telling us that he is now the host of Heavy Hands, that Connor was arrested for selling vapes full of amphetamines to children. 20 minutes into the show, a drunk Connor storms into Zane's room, pepper sprays him, and takes control of the show.
The remaining run time is Connor playing Q Anon videos shared by Bryce Mitchell and ranting, until the police show up and he flees the scene
Conor truly has the voice of 144,000 divine angels👼
Feels like this should've been a live show lol
Best intro I’ve ever heard. Completely overwhelmed
Connor entering his Tim Heidecker Oscar Special-era with this one.
i like the order this year. good call fellas
I like to imagine someone who has started listening any time in the last few years, who is shocked at the disrespect towards the deceased Pat Wyman
Listening in a suit, because anything less just doesn't feel right.
OH HELL YES!
11:30 you guys should really mention that BMF title winners are 0-6
18:14 As somebody who mostly grapples but crosstrains a bit in mma and boxing, Conor is totally right that pure grappling doesn’t have a wide overlap with mma. Most of the bottom game is really dangerous and you ought to emulate Oliveira or Pantoja, where if you’re on the bottom you should sweep or submit just to get up and keep the action going; it’s difficult without strikes to drive the pace from the bottom, and with strikes it’s extremely dangerous unless you’re using something like deep K guard or really hard knee reaps to make strikes difficult to land. This isn’t a knock against jitz though, because you could say the same about kickboxing or wrestlings overlap with MMA; they’re all contextual and limited by the existence of other techniques and that’s what makes this sport so cool.
Edit: I TAKE IT ALL BACK CONOR HAS NO IDEA WHAT HES TALKING ABOUT, x guard and buggy chokes are not trendy at all what is this guy smoking - from what I can tell, the biggest trend in BJJ rn overwhelmingly is pretending to wrestle lol
Hey man, my vibe was correct even if my terminology was abysmal lol. Let's be honest, BJJ is practically on some chess shit when it comes to giving every single position it's own distinct name; not like boxing and wrestling. "duuuhhh we just call it a foot sweep."
@ when your sport is a Venn diagram between people on the spectrum and people who are stupid high you gotta be specific! NOW if you’d said reverse X to far hip ashi or the outside buggy I’d buy what you’re selling
24:30 Best fights
A great way to cap the year off, I much appreciate you fellas making this show.
Next year you should invite Ralek Gracie to come on as a special musical guest, and him and Connor can open the show with a duet of G in a Gi
Bro who the hell did you get to write and arrange that intro xd. Truly incredible stuff. Like, actual really tasty harmony.
As a pretty good grappler myself, I have faith in Phil’s theory that we will eventually see more weird subs and trends.
So much of what has evolved in bjj over past 8 years has basically never been attempted in mma and it is because nobody knows how to do it well and not that it isn’t suitable for mma or doesn’t work. A lot of these things have their place (some things will never be very relevant of course)
De la riva and k guard system have pretty good leg frames to keep a standing opponent off of you from ground and pound (and allow upkicks) and also centre around taking the back or getting back bodylock. Both Charles oliveira and DJ have both attempted babybolo from DLR guard briefly and were safe while doing so. Both of these guards can also lead into the 5050 which is one of the best leg entanglements for mma.
Ryan hall is a bit of a meme but he really did have a 5050 system which protects you from ground and pound and puts the opponent in a very complicated situation that is very hard to disengage from. Ilia Topuria never got put in 5050 and this fight is a bad example of how to apply this (it has its place and shouldn’t be entire gameplan)
X guard I see as less useful (because of lack of frames unlike k guard) but mcgregor successfully used it against nate and can save your ass against standing ground and pound from someone like shavkat. Most fighters never attempt it because they put zero time into it in favour of the more conventional methods.
Leg attacks are basically the only thing that works well from guard in bjj these days and mma guys never even try. And when I do see them try they usually kinda suck at them. I think a few high profile wins will see more fighters making the risky investment of training time into these positions
This is always one of the best podcasts of the year, across all podcasts on earth
Those background vocals go hard!
Best morning Handie cheers fellas hope you all have a blessed year !! ❤
At last! Complete with excruciating intro. Perfect.
Just remembered that Mayra Bueno Silva fought for a belt this year 🤧
and she did so well for approximately 1.5 rounds
LMAO amazing intro - Love you guys!!
I like how they're very confident on what the Nick Lentz vs Charles Olivera award was when I think the two years before last year it was just a Charles Olivera fight and one that just reminded them of Nick Lentz vs Charles Olivera
Good luck matching that intro ever again 😂
I expected Jingliang vs Prates for the glue factory award, that was unpleasant to watch.
That joe rogan milking segment threw me off 😂 wasnt expecting that one
I LOVE THE HANDIES SO MUCH
I'm a BJJ head and have been listening for years now lol, and tbh I think BJJ is still valuable for creating movement opportunities to get back to your feet. Also MMA fighters, as a general rule of thumb, overreact a lot to being put in leg entanglements, that's why attacking the legs is such a good way to create enough space to get back to your feet. Unfortunately too many fighters get tunnel vision on the leglock, and bjj guys who transition to MMA are often too focused on playing guard instead of incorporating wrestle-ups into their games and this is the case in jiu jitsu as well. Tbh BJJ is still in the early stages of recognizing how valuable the wrestle up is, I hope that more people will start incorporating it into their jiu jitsu like how Demian Maia did
Hallelujah!
Connor spent the last week and a half of editing trying to find something that works as award show background music as well as it does for porn
Episode 14 of asking for a Heavy Hands Tapology league (Fuck yes Handies are here)
Brilliant!!! Haha! What an intro ❤
That intro was beautiful
the Blowies to end the year & the Handies to start it
The oliveria vs lentz fight of the year was CLEARLY Oliviera vs Chandler 2
Edit: haha just listened ahead
Any chance you can post the lyrics and the chords?
it's probably better for you if they don't
Damn I dropped a like at that gorgeous intro 🎉🎉🎉🎉
I did not think a second verse was coming.
Singular jiu jitsu fan here: I would say most of the high level guard work these days does not have a ton of applicability in MMA or it's just designed to let you get up anyway.
Combine that with the folk style/judo hybridization meta and you have like five viable submissions coming from the front head or back. You either have to snatch something up off the front headlock or get to their back where you're so dominant that it can be hard to fight off and everyone has adequate leg defense.
Levi Jones is the current flag carrier for high level no gi guard work in the lighter weight classes (aka the only ones that matter because heavyweight is dogshit in every combat sport I swear to God) coming out of CJI and that is very much a BJJ-only guard.
That was my feeling. Good to know I wasn't talking entirely out of my ass
@heavyhands1383 yeah I don't think you were too far off. I'm sure there will be a meta shift again at some point. Personally, the current meta is what I've always enjoyed anyway so it's been fun to see.
Everyone loves seeing wild shit happen in the cage, though. Khabib's triangle setup on Gaethje became one I use often
Intro was fire.
Rda vs Geoff Neal should be in the sakuraba ear category imo
Let’s go!!
Finally! My boys!
I love being able to listen to Heavy Hands and my unpopular opinions being vindicated. Literally let a sigh of relief out when you pointed out how ugly the Shara Bullet double-backfist ko was...
You guys are just missing one thing. It doesn't matter if you can't see your opponent when you're practically blind anyway 😂.
Amazing
Let’s go!!! Love
This podcast
I think petrino vs Smith was a good candidate for the Elkins vs Johnson award.
He was the greatest singer... of the night
absolute cinema
Great show as always, love the handies, especially the glue factory segment
You guys gotta stop hating Du Plessis so much though, his shit works in MMA
Also, the redhead Russian pirate is obviously a trash hunan being, but c'mon a double spinning backfist KO is crazy impressive, it's not a bad KO. The Holloway one is kind of dumber despite being insanely cool
"That's true. I don't want to give it to him again anyway. I'm sick of even having to think about Colby Covington at this point. So. Hhhh. Uhhh. Tai Tuivasa...
3 hours!? Let's gooooo *unzips*
The Blowies where good but the Handies are better, Glue, glue for everyone!
Pretty sure this is the video I should show my girlfriend to reveal/explain my love of mma ✌️😘
Nvm she already knows, and it’s inexplicable.
these intros just harder and ahrder
Did think Paddy's Triangle Armbar over Bobby Green should have gotten a mention
? Agapova isn't russian, she's kazakh. There was beef between her and Moroz but it had nothing to do with the war
14:11 Ortega vs Rodríguez cmon
Love u though (I love Phil more)
Just want to point out that Dubois is also British
Carlos Leal slapped the shit out of Rinat Fakhretdinov, had a great game plan and got shamelessly robbed but no one cared bc it was the first fight on the card. Poor guy couldnt even get a Handy ™ nomination
Lets gooooooooooo
Finally conor ffs
did yaou guys not watch orolbai vs rebecky, the actual fight of the year?
Jesus Christ that intro lol
I complete in bjj most weekends. Love x and k guard. Yeah it’s not for fighting. Not offended at all. Still enjoy my weird sport.
Lmao 1:28:46
Shout out to Raging Al in the intro.
LETS GO
Is that Frank Sinatra?
In future years, you guys might have fun adding two separate Jamahal Hill awards, one for saltiest cope and the other for biggest keyboard warrior or try-hard. Remember when Paul Craig wrecked Hill’s arm and he was super chill about it? This year he became the guy who took three Ls against Pereira, first in the ring; then post-yawn with the “maybe he just woke up from UFC 300” quip; and finally when he tried to start fake static in Pereira’s gym but refused to spar. Mmm. Mmm.
Tsarukyan is a sleeper in the bad vibe category
🎉🎉🎉
all hail the greatest show on earth cause no zane simon, jk the other show is also the greatest show on earth, cause no british guy.
jesus christ the fucking hilarious intro. give the man a fucking grammy jesus that is funny LOOOOOOOOL.
real comedy show level funny. that could have been on the daily show or snl or something
tai bought a pub in sydney with some rugby stars, he dgaf any more
HANDIES! KINDA LIKE.... Uuuhhhh... Ummm... KIND OF LIKE... Hmmm
Edit: HELL YEAH SHARA BULLET HATE