I saw this video about 6 months after it was uploaded in 2018. After years of counseling and medication for depression, I realized that I didn't have a truly challenging load to bear. So my wife and I stopped preventing and got pregnant with our first child that very month. Within 3.5 years, we had several more. My wife and I now have 4 sons ages 1-4, due to twins in the middle. I haven't been to counseling or had medication in years. I did my best to be the most responsible person at my brother's unexpected funeral in 2021. I planned it all and gave the eulogy. I gave up my personal "dreams" for my career in order to stay closer to home for the wife and kids. These are the best decisions I've ever made. I'll always be thankful to Dr Peterson and thankful that this clip got uploaded. I believe God led me to it.
There are many ways one could interpret this comment. Many likely share similar experiences in their own lives and can empathize with it. While others may not understand how you were able to give up so much freedom (aka: personal time typically spent finding ways to entertain yourself) and just accept a lifetime of responsibility. Of course, there's also the... less mature/'grown-up' crowd that disagree completely, fully believing they really can spend their entire lives doing nothing but having their idea of fun. On a sidenote, what exactly did make you seemingly instantly decide to have children to give yourself "a truly challenging load to bear"? Had you and your wife already been discussing it beforehand, and discovering Dr. Peterson's video just served as that one little nudge you needed to be absolutely certain?
This is exactly why young men get addicted to video games. Video games _simulate_ responsibility by giving you a goal and making you, the player, solely responsible for realizing that goal. Video games are about heroism and success, which young men absolutely _crave_ and can't find in their real lives.
@@Ray03595 Can confirm. I started exercising with my brother at home. And I feel like it gives me a purpose, or at least something to be proud of in these hard times
This is why making your bed the first thing you do is crucial. Then you shower and put on pants. You've accomplished something and you are ready to go.
"Women know what they have to do, men have to figure out what they have to do." As a woman, I never would have realized how true this was until I had a baby. Instantly, I felt a profound sense of meaning and purpose that I cannot describe. While my husband can help me to a certain extent with the child-rearing, he has taken on the responsibility of being the provider for our family. For years before this I had rejected that men and women should have these particular roles. Now, suddenly, I understand. I try to tell my husband every day that I am grateful for his work and for everything he does to support our family. I know it is important for him to know that he is doing something with a purpose. I KNOW that caring for my baby has a purpose; I think he needs to be reminded sometimes that going to work every day is for a purpose as well. So I make sure to thank him.
It’s good that you realize this, we as men need that to keep us going. It will at least double what he is capable of contributing, and does contribute, to the unit.
I read a short story in my german class and it's about a boy who doesn't feel needed by anyone so he gets suicidal. But as he was trying to kill himself he reminded himself that he still had to get wood for his family so he went on to get that wood. The responsibility of getting wood for his family is what kept him sane , needed and alive.
@@user-jj3mo5vv7q It's called " Das Holz für morgen " from Wolfgang Borchert. Here's a link of a website just scroll down until you see it : mondamo.de/alt/borchert.htm
Jordan: "You know I was watching the Simpsons the other day" Me thinking: *nice, he likes to chill as well sometimes* Jordan: "AND I DECONSTRUCTRED IT"
I once asked my father how he gets up and goes to work every day (physical labor job that I hated doing with him when I was younger). He replied "When you have a family that depends on you, and you love them, you are happy to do it". Now that I'm an adult and have met someone I want to spend my life with, I'm beginning to understand what he meant. It's so, so true.
I woke up from a dream i was living at 23, and now im in panic mode, i feel huuge void inside myself, calling for help wont do much becasue nobody can fill that. I am alive and taking part in life. I cant accept that yet, it is so hard for me. I need to take part in society and have motiviation to live, nobody told me how it really looks like, this reality. Nobody. I was lied. I cant bear it.
Clearly you didn’t read Peterson’s book or you’d know, everyone has something to teach anyone and anyone can learn something from everyone. Stop being proud, maybe your professor majors in Peterson psychology
5:30 "Pick something up and carry it. Make it heavy enough so you can think: useless as I am, at least I could move that from there to there" I love this quote.
@@chimesquare that verse instantly entered my mind when he said pick something up and carry it. It also reminded me of “my yoke is easy and my burden is light” Weird how a lot of Dr. Peterson’s points go back to biblical principles
Dean Moore Thank you for sharing that. Well it’s really hard to do anything nowadays since the whole world is still under this crisis you know? I’m starting school again in September but I’m not excited at all ‘cause everything is going to be online so I’m not gonna get the “freshman experience” you know? School doesn’t even really motivate me at all because the way I see it you’re doing the same thing as everyone else but the main objective is to do it better than everyone else. Even though you might think differently, but I’m sure you’re not that bad!
Trust me, don't listen to anything JP has to say. Just do what makes you happy and work hard towards that goal. If you really listen to JPs lectures he is just a pity party and has absolutely no solutions to anything he has to say. Whenever he's asked a question he never has an answer. he doesn't actually have anything profound to say don't listen to him he'll just make your life miserable. He never offers any real solutions on how to get established in life. So don't listen to him instead work hard save money and invest money now, I promise you won't regret it.
@@KENNETHTXMMA your life sounds exhausting, but if you found happiness then good for you. After all obtaining happiness is the meaning of life, your happiness may be different than mine but I am sure we share some common ground as well. So i will keep in mind some of your recommendations.
@@KENNETHTXMMAliving by pursuing things that are meaningful regardless of whether it makes you happy is a commendable way of living, I guess people who live like this are the same people that are capable of writing the next great American novel. But just how many successful people have tell us in their dying beds their regrets in life, they regret becoming successful at the expense of relationships, family, friendship they felt as if they hadn’t really lived, they regret postponing their happiness in order to achieve something meaningful. Don't get me wrong you seem to be a laser oriented guy with a clear goal in mind but not all of us are willing to sacrifice happiness for success. When I die I am sure I will have my good share of regrets but I don't want a "why did I invest so much of my limited time in this world trying to achieve xyz instead of my own personal happiness"
Everyone is saying he’s a genius and he’s incredible. That’s how desperate our society is for a male role model. Jordan appears to be a normal, mentally stable man giving simple even-keeled advice. It’s refreshing for all of us because we’re so used to the Tony Robbins, Will Smith’s etc. who push extravagant wealth and extreme lifestyles and tactics (grind all day, work yourself to the bone, or wake up at 4:30 am and drink blended spinach everyday.) Jordan is just the simple, honest man who has been married to the same woman for years and years. Basically he’s the responsible, mentally healthy father we wished we all had. There’s no gimmicks or fancy clothes or cars or trail of cheating, affairs, broken lives. He’s real.
His IQ is 144 which would literally by definition make him a genius. Not a lot of people on this planet have taught at Harvard. Using the words "Genious" and "Incredible" to describe him doesn't exactly scream desperation for a role model. Admiration and respect are two entirely different things.
@@mattbedforth9569 Lots of academics who believe in extremely nutty ideas have IQs well within that range; indeed I think many of his peers fit this description. They wouldn't be called geniuses for cogently stating their beliefs.
I've been suicidal for about 6 years now, tried it way too many times and failed miserably, destroying my life even further. I never knew why I wanted to die so badly and none of the therapists could help me understand it either. Now this guy, doesn't know me, never met me, doesn't talk about me, but helped me more than anyone else ever did. Edit (Update): Didn't really expect much traction from a comment like this, just wanted to show my appreciation for jp tbh, but thanks for the kind words anyways. I've been ''sober'' (if one can call it that) from suicidality for almost a year now, in the end it just came down to finding some sort of purpose/responsibility. Not saying it fixed my issues all togheter, but it's definetly getting better.
Thank God your attempts weren't successful. You're being set up for great things, Nitrolav. When you look back on your life, you'll remember these videos as a turning point for when things got better. You'll get it!! Best to you on your journey
The whole lecture is essentially telling you to find something to be responsible for so that life doesn’t feel like self indulgence and self loathing for lacking a purpose or passion
That's indeed a very good summary. But i would just remove the passion thing. It's part of living in the 21st century to feel purposeless. It's something we haven't been able to cast down yet successfully as a society. But I don't think finding something to be responsible for is a quest to fill a void that real-world-passion left unfilled. It's more about filling the void of purpose that a lot of people feel when they're not religious or deeply spiritual, but then again, not because they're not passionate.
Add0805 well that’s completely false because feeling purposeless is NOT just a 21st century problem considering people have been killing themselves for 100s of years for no reason. Samurai would kill themselves if they lost in battle because they lost their purpose for living
Jon Gardner well he saying to find something and give it meaning so that you have to be responsible. Thats how you find purpose in your own life. That doesn’t make it the exact reason we exist but it allows us to continue to exist without feelings of self hatred or distaste for the long boringness of life without reason
I've followed this advice since this video came out. It genuinely has helped me in so many ways, but I wanna caution anyone who takes this to heart. Responsibility does give meaning, but I've taken it too personally and its resulted with me equating my worth with my degree of responsibility. If I'm not productive - even if it's just for a day - it makes me feel worthless. Do what he says and define goals and assume responsibility, but simultaneously approve of your character and give yourself breaks. As long as you set goals and actively work towards them, you should be proud of yourself, but never let your level of productivity define the worth of your personality and life. Breaks are okay.
damn right! thank you for this reminder. taking responsibility without a strong character and/or self esteem is like taking a heavy load without any exercise. i don't want to deter anyone from taking responsibility. but never forget to train on your self esteem and self respect and self love etc. otherwise you forget about yourself and live only for that what you took responsibility for, be it a task or a person or sth completely different.
Responsibility is a long term matter. Being a parent, for example, is a life time calling. Measuring achievement on the scale of a single day is impossible. You can’t beat yourself up for a failure over a single day, because the failure is a learning experience that can benefit you for a lifetime.
Great way to put it. I feel like all arguments and discussions about any topic, if you go deep into it, lead to the same conclusion I've assimilated throughout the years from eastern ancient philosophies: Moderation. The middle way. People should strive to find balance in all things. The only argument I've found against this is that life becomes dull if you don't experience the highs and lows from time to time, but that's the key - only sometimes. But that mid point position should be aligned as default. I can say I've felt way more light (mentally and emotionally) and at ease with the universe, with myself and with mortality since I've gotten a bit more acquainted with philosophy and psychology (science and technology being my primary interests) and made myself able to get to that realization, partly thanks to a few psychedelic experiences that acted as a catalyst also. I truly believe the answers lie within ourselves, but we have to sacrifice some things in return. Nothing is free but our imagination. Humanity as a whole, as well as every individual, both need to take responsibility and tread a more sensible, compassionate and respectable path towards a synergetic existence with nature. Finally, it's imperative to give personal meaning to the world and to life, since reality is more subjective than we think. It's easy to stir away from that "center" and we often do it in an intellectual or emotional way, but it's of utmost importance to keep ourselves open to subjects while staying true to personal principles of meaning, moral and quality, altogether questioning, feeling and reflecting upon anything that life throws at us. On that note, it seems that individuality is paramount to genuine satisfaction. People should develop and cultivate it, be it through honing skills (mechanical aspect) or through creativity (organic aspect). That's why art, aesthetics and symbols are such important languages in my opinion.
I listen to JBP several times a week, and he makes so much sense almost all the time. I wish I heard his wisdom 40 years ago. I intuited a lot of it, some of it came from family, but I stumbled around like a fool and sometimes still do so. The way he phrases his (commonsense) wisdom matters. JBP is a course for my son in homeschool. My son isn't a big reader, so he's reading summaries of both his "rules" books but I supplement the lessons with podcasts and videos. He's made a huge difference in our lives, particularly because my son has always struggled to find a strong male figure who matters. Today is my brother's birthday. He died 50 years ago this year at age 9. Afterward, my parents were in a deep depression and my father was close to suicide. What saved him? Responsibility to his wife and two remaining children. He will often say, "Responsibility is everything." He's right.
what happens when men don't feel like they want to take on responsibility because they get nothing from it? ... but more like are worse than they were before
@Entrenched Mgtow Indeed this is true especially in western culture, but its slowly bled into eastern civilizations too. Women have been systematically destroying a way of life that we'd had for centuries, that is where a man is the provider and the woman is the caretaker. The thing is that corporations have been in great support of women entering the workforce because it means increasing the labor pool and creating more profit for those companies. I've looked at it from both perspectives, and as a man i cannot fathom why women don't want to have a cozy coddled life being a full time wife, instead insisting on competing with men in the workplace.
I really like my impulsive low class pleasures. Problem is, that to finance them, I need to act responsible. 🤣 Luckily I only have a job to worry about, not a bunch of kids and a crazy baby mama.
I was in a dark place in my life. My life was a mess. As much as I tried, I couldn't get out of bed, I was in great depression in my life. Watching Jordan Peterson's online lectures, I started little by little. After two years, little by little, I managed to have personal responsibility, to have a vision for my future. You really helped me a lot. Thank you very much Mr. Peterson.
@@LostTumbs "women are so selfish they don't listen to mens problems" well at least you're not stereotyping. No-one is trying to change anyone's personality, not sure which comment you're even replying to.
@@LostTumbs That's not what feminism is about, not in the slightest. You're misguided and hurt I understand. I'm sorry for whoever hurt you in order to take your irrational anger out on the rest of us who actually care about men and women equally. Keyword equally. No facts from you just your opinion. If you truly knew about statistics you'd also mention that women are discriminated against in work environments, slut shamed more than men, paid less, forced into children marriages with a lower chance of education. Not to mention period cramps, risk of dying in labor (biological difference but still). Do you wanna be a woman? Go ahead, get a sex change and face all these things.
Can you believe they actually tried to cancel this wonderful man? One of few shining beacons for millions of lost men, (and women) and somehow amongst the brigade of disgusting celebrities we could pick from, he came under fire. I just hope JP somehow knows that we all see and appreciate the intrinsic value in what he does.
@@ragv435 Im a nasty sinful bastard. and apparrently im no where near as evil as a leftist. because I wouldnt cancel the truth. although I want to kill myself for how edgy I am at least the truth makes me realize theres still light at the end of the tunnel damn those bastards motherless lonely fools who cancel the truth.
but what do we do when all the useful jobs are done by machines? That is the way we are heading right now! Society is becoming mechanically autonomous of its makers!
@@NostalgicHearts your right..because we rerally need a society exclusivly populated by mechanics don't we?! I just hope there will be about 100 mil vancancies to go round lol!
As a male. Jordan speaks to me. Guys need someone to look up to and tell them they're making mistakes. Thank you for helping with my depression and the stresses of life.
They also need someone to tell them that they aren’t the bane of modern existence: the boogeymen of society. Jordan is one of the few people actually encouraging young men and he does it not at all at the expense of young women
Your depression and stress in life is natural living in a slave society. You’re feeling that way because deep down you know this isn’t how humans are supposed to be living. And you’re right. We have been dragged to this place by sociopaths with all the money.
"Gods Truth" lies in this video-title and of course the c-section. Its so full of truth and bless, its amazing: ruclips.net/video/FdU2Bol04tI/видео.html&lc=Ugyywq6hpNY_2Vfq5vN4AaABAg Here, have this URL to a comment AND a Video, both in once. Have Fun!
I'm a woman and LOVE your videos! I was raised primarily by my disabled father: a "Greatest Generation" veteran of WWII, and had the common sense, insight and honorable traits that you teach and was also an exceptional evaluator of people and human nature, with a high level of intuition and foresight. After 62 years of life on this planet, my conclusion is that, compared to the man who raised me, the average american (both male and female) is undisciplined, entitled, lazy, and tend to be resentful of those who aren't. Thank you for being a fabulous role model and virtual father figure for so many who don't have a good one. Keep up the good work - the world needs your insight!! Sending blessings to you and your family and am so glad to know that you seem to be on the other side of recent health challenges.
As a 31 year old stepfather I'm inclined to agree. I grew up with a great grandfather who was well respected and helped in building the entire small town he lived in. I believe that a major difference from then to now is comfort. I try and teach my kids to be the best they can be. In doing that it forces me to be the best example of that I can conceive. The difference between the generations seems to be comfort. I cannot teach them to be strong in the face of uncomfortable things when everything around them is seemingly built for comfort. Same as when I was growing up. I just happened to join the marine corps after school and became strong in the face of danger and uncomfortability. To instill these values to young generations, there will have to be a huge adversity to overcome and I'm afraid of what it will be.
Steffen Ljosheim responsability without authority is slavery. Dont let jordan peterson drag you back into the Bs contract that is today marriage and family life
I can relate to this. My dad isn't a bad man, I was just a very difficult child and it seems like he just gave up at some point and stopped teaching me, except for the times he criticized me. I am still trying to dig myself out of that mindset but I'm progressing. Awareness is half of the battle, once you're aware of it you can begin working on it. Thanks for writing something relatable. Take care, I wish you well
My dad also called me names growing up. Stupid, dumbass, loser, and always referring to me as Mark, my alcoholic degenerate uncle. This really really sticks with me hard to this day. My dad taught me expressing anger was ok. I resent that aspect. But my father also taught me to work hard. Playing baseball for so many young years, he said. "You're not going to be good at one position, but learn to play all positions". That aspect has been a huge part of me. At any and every job I want to learn everything I can. All I want to do is make my dad proud, I know he is now. But it never feels like enough. It's this wicked game I play in my own head. Unfortunately i cant share this with my dad, because it will crush him. He didnt know any better raising kids at such a young age, with no solid parenting in his life. So as bad or as hard as it may be I'm still grateful for his presence and the live he gave me.
@@Iamtherealflip I think some form of abuse was common with boomer parents and gen x parents. I and alot of people I know where either verbally or physically abused. My parents weren't the best but the tried. You can do it. The insecurity and self doubt this causes is astronomical
@@BinaryBlueBull my parents gave up on me at some point too. I couldn't keep my grades up, I wanted to do what I wanted. Drugs, sex and the like. I lost my dad when I was 19, he was 41. That was a while ago, and me and my mom have gotten very close since then, even though our relationship when I was young was rocky at best.
It's the speed and value which you place on it if you can get this lesson before everyone else you've been able to apply it before the masses even know it's relevant
It’s okay man. I’m 26 too, about to finish my studies next month. If you sort yourself out now in the coming months, you’re more than fine. We’re so Damn Lucky to have bump into this genius on time. Very lucky. Watch a JP video a day keeps the existential suffering away.
I'm a 27 year old female and have accomplished a lot but feel like I have to play in a man's game to be able to make my own living since I don't have a family.
But he wants men to get married ...........but he foolishly ignores how divorce steals everything he works for all his life. Take responsibility and run your own business. If employed learn how to invest your savings judiciously instead of blowing it up foolishly.
I just saw one of his talks that address marriage. Misquoting him a little bit but... "Vows are a form responsibility. It's a bottom line rule: I'm not going anywhere, you're not going anywhere, we can't run from our problems so we might as well work it out."
When my first daughter was born my wife was so focused she was an inspiration to me. She knew exactly what to do and how to do it. I felt completely lost, I felt like a third wheel. My wife was in complete control of the situation inside the home. I had no purpose inside the house except to be a good dad to my daughter but that was the fun bit. We were renting our home at the time. One morning when my daughter was about 6months I had a realisation that my role here was to do everything I could to facilitate my wife to care for our child and the best way I could do that was to buy a home for us. My eldest daught is now 9. In that time I got enough money together to get a deposit for a house, buy the house, pay off the mortgage in full and buy another 2 houses which we now rent out. 9 years ago I was a cad technician in an engineers office earning a pretty miserable wage. I got an engineering degree 6 years ago and built an engineering business which is now thriving. I figured out my purpose, my role, my responsibility. That morning I figured that out was the best day of my life apart from the days my daughters were born. My eldest daught now when she's not in school is with me all the time even when I work. Everything is possible when you know what it is you need to do. The best thing you could do is figure out what it is you need to do and this is worth spending alot of time pondering.
saamohod I didnt think you listened to the lecture. Responsibility is for both sexes, but women find that easier, not to mention they are child rearers which ia a big part of what they look forward to. Men dont have that.
A mid-life crisis seems like an evaluation after 20 years or so of working on life goals. It can be a good tool. Imagine never evaluating how life is going.. Just a random person's thoughts.
@@michaelharvey7254, thanx, I came to a very similar conclusion. Like Socrates said; Wonder is the beginning of Wisdom. Imagine what hell it would be if you go through life without self assessment and only realize it on your deathbed.
For many people he is conservative and blunt, who speaks politically incorrect statement. But for me, he speaks the real shit. Hats off to you man. Respect from India.
I am so blessed to have had a father that taught me to work hard and respect women. Responsible for livestock, your horse and dog ect. I have a highly successful son in farming and cattle with 3 young sons. Married to the same woman for 50 years. What else could one ask for at this time in life.
If you ever ask yourself what's the point… You get to be a roadmap for everyone else that shares your struggles in the future, even if nobody ever knows your name.
he is sending you back to the plantation. Find something you enjoy doing and do it for yourself. Work on your self, get your personal needs fulfilled, then move forward while checking wetter anything improves your life, and only take on burdens that have a positive outcome for yourself, that is how you find the way back to you
Angel Herrera 1) Nothing about life will ever be fair. Erase the kindergarten idea of fairness from your mind. Be the best you that you can be and be happy for other people's accomplishments and blessings. 2)Learn that attitude is a choice and you can choose to be happy no matter your circumstances. You cannot control what life throws at you but you have 100% control over how you choose to respond to it. 3)Live beneath your means. Practice self discipline more so than self indulgence. Be humble and kind. 4)Hard work does not guarantee success. Hard work builds character but it doesn't pay well. Smart work pays well. You can work hard pushing against a brick wall all day but no one is looking to hire wall pushers. Be prepared to take advantage of opportunities that may come. 5)Life goes by fast. Don't be so driven in your career that you miss out on spending as much time as you can with your family and especially your kids. Play with them when they ask you to, answer their questions, leave your cell phone in the car when you get home. Don't assume you'll live to old age and that there will always be tomorrow. 6)Work daily on having a magnetic personality. Be a positive person. Try not to gossip or ever say something bad about someone else. Have a firm handshake, look people in the eye, smile, learn to have excellent communication skills, remember people's names, don't dress like a slob, be punctual, show an interest in the interests of those you meet. 7)Don't take everything so serious. Hard times don't last. Be chill when others would be pitching a fit. Life knocks everyone on their butt, losers curl up in the fetal positon and think that they are just unlucky and destined to endure nothing but shit, winners shake it off and man up. When the chips are down that is when you see what someone is made of. 8)Always be learning something and making progress at being better at something. People are always happiest when they are in the process of accomplishing something. 9)Appreciate the small things that no one else does. There is beauty all around. One man's chicken is another man's steak. It's all about perspective. 10)You will fail, but you don't have to be a failure. Every day is an opportunity for a fresh start and another go with a deeper resolve.
This why army is so appealing to some guys. It gives you the purpose. You don’t have to decide anything since people above would decide it for you. Just follow orders, be useful and take pride in this. Sad, isn’t it? But it makes life so much easier
@@JB-wh4cn mate, in my country military service is compulsory, had a whole year to think about that. There is this patriotic feeling they try to implant in your head and it sustains you for a while but the more you there the less it works for some of us.
Not true. Men in general are naturally competitive and the military provides an opportunity to display our intelligence and strength among other men. Also Men who join the military understand that we are ones who have to fight the wars and battles not our women.
You also liked the fact that he said that your responsibilities are having infants and taking care of them? Because that is something feminists don't really seem to want to hear (not that I'm calling you a feminist)
She's not alone. Think about it, women have been oppressed in one way or another for centuries. In the grand scheme of things women's rights and stuff is still evolving. Agreed it goes to the extreme. But both the sexes have to understand each other and not compare or compete. He's right biologically each have their role to play we have to understand that and work together considering that as a starting point. At this point women are operating on "fight" mode because in the past we've operated on "flight". Years of societal conditioning on gender roles. But that is not an excuse to move the identities,rights,roles,responsibilities of men/boys. As women we need to put in the work to understand the how the whole set up of society works because we weren't a part of the minds that constructed it. He's right we need to listen to all sides and take responsibility for this. A superficial study with shouting "rights" helps no one. In essence, it's worthless and won't hold strong. The 15% will grow but it'll take time the bandwagon effect will happen eventually. In the meanwhile empathise, use logic and don't hate. Understand
I want to offer my opinion. As a man, when you talked about the responsibilities as man, I held my head high through out the rest of the video. I watched my father thrown away his life for his work for the family. I only know what he did was very noble and I want to follow his foot steps. But this lecture put it in to words. I am deeply appreciated. Thank you very very much.
I was having a conversation with my siblings and one of them said, I could never do what you do, youre working 60 hours every week, why do you do it. I said because I have a family that depends on me, children who will need help with college. Most of being an adult is about doing what you must, not what you want. It sounds sad, but it's not, it feels good providing and being a protector.
just imagine if you HELPED your father do his responsibilities, he may have been around for you right now. . instead you were playing vid games and chewing bubble gum :)
Please people don't say that is the advice you take away from this, why would throwing your life away working be the answer. You have one life and your children will be much happier having memories with you in them. Sometimes you have to work hard long hours to make it by but don't idolize that kind of life.
@@torterrapin4719 Although I can't say that I disagree with you. Given the option available at the time, I still believe that his decision is the best option. Our situation were very restricted.
Chris Rock said in his stand up show once "Only women, children and pets are loved unconditionally, men have to earn it"....and if that ain't a sad side not to your comment!....
@@tyrozinehappykitchen Making the world a better place can be seen as (in-)valid as your examples of a materialistic person wanting to accumulate more material. Living in a van with a hot chick could make you happy, for many people a life like this is not only undesirable but also impossible, because maybe vans don't exist where you life, or you are to poor to afford one, or you are gay and have no interests in girls. None of this shit matters ̶u̶̶n̶̶l̶̶e̶̶s̶̶s̶̶ ̶̶y̶̶o̶̶u̶'̶r̶̶e̶̶ ̶̶m̶̶a̶̶k̶̶i̶̶n̶̶g̶̶ ̶̶t̶̶h̶̶e̶̶ ̶̶w̶̶o̶̶r̶̶l̶̶d̶̶ ̶̶a̶̶ ̶̶b̶̶e̶̶t̶̶t̶̶e̶̶r̶̶ ̶̶p̶̶l̶̶a̶̶c̶̶e. Leave out the last part and you have a generalizable statement. Is it peer pressure to want to be happy? How can we be sure that this is not just another social cognition? Does your body peer pressure you with sending signals to your brain that force you to satisfy your needs?
@Sasori Tobi I see your point of view, personally speaking I've witness and experienced women love kids and pets more than their men, or men in general. I've come to a bit've a conclusion it all goes back to biology, with both sexes really when you think about it, we're both driven by innate biological traits, it's just a case of how self aware and educated each individual is to this to exert self control and higher thinking and reasoning: Men not to want to go out and f*ck everything that moves but to self improve build a good life and range women on their list of goals in life by looking for quality over quantity, women not to become sluts and climb the hypergamy ladder before they hit the wall and leave themselves out in the cold in finding a quality parter by always searching for the ideal or continuing to see men as a utility to satisfy their never ending thirst for material satisfaction and comfort, which is again them not getting to grips with their innate drives to nest build for potential offspring.
About to turn 23 in a week. From 15 to 20 I was living life in the way that would make Jordan proud. But sadly the last 3 years have been living hell (especially 2020) and besides the shitty circumstances a lot of it has been my fault. I went into a severe downward spiral mostly because of my own inability to meet my responsibilites (procrastination and fear of failure) on due time and making stupid mistakes trying to repair the damage, family drama/problems didn't help my situation at all as I almost flunked out of medical school. Got into a semi-shitty relationship in that time frame (which I still don't even know if its worth investing in), I started living as Pinocchio in pleasure island with friends who just dragged me down because most of them are lazy, hedonistic and nihilistic man-children who live lives of self gratification. I was the complete opposite of that but eventually I guess I did turn like them, I started smoking cigarettes and weed, drinking alcohol, stopped working out and bought a gaming pc. Lost all of my athleticism and physique, self respect, sharp witt and analytical skills, mental strength and will power and to top it all off my hair also started thinning rapidly and maybe Ill be bald really soon. Went through severe depression, dealt with suicidal thoughts everyday in 2018,luckily they seem to have reduced drastically. But I have decided to take action, I switched universities in 2020 (same studies though) and am going to have a semi-fresh start at least. I am re-watching my fav jp vids trying to propell a positive change in my psyche. I still smoke cigarettes sadly ( no weed or alcohol in the last whole year), still procrastinate (a lot less than before though), am still in that relationship (its a bit stable now), my group of friends has semi-disbanded but switching cities will force me to basically be alone. All I'm gonna try is to improve everyday as much as I can, Its high time I stopped feeling sorry for myself and start taking responsibility for my shitty life because nobody is going to fix my problems and give me a nice future.
Female here - I’m glad a lot of men find guidance and look up to Dr. Peterson. I myself also look up to him in the same way. Though I am female, there’s a lot I can relate to and am driven by personal responsibility and finding a purpose. Great as always Dr. :)
Okay, then probably you lack the sense of responsibility, as he says, men come to his lectures because they are less agreeable, hence less responsible.
@@cvxcfv Yeah you must be right, but I was actually annoyed by the fact he came to that girl to explain her what he thought she was going through, without obviously knowing her. I unfortunately forgot he and other people didn’t gave a single fuck what I thought
The meaning of life. The funny thing is, a lot of what Jordan says rings true for me, long before I found his videos. I've been defiant my entire life, without going in to detail, life has sucked from the moment I was born, literally and I've always been angry at being forced to be here and in turn just defied every norm. I didn't have a path, I was stumbling back and forth and went down some dark alleys. It wasn't until I met my missus of now 9 years that things began to change. I slowly humbled myself, stopped being angry at everyone. I made a family and I strive to be better and do well for them. The meaning of life went from nothing to loving, nurturing and raising my family. I'm happy, I'm driven, and along the road of life I learnt many valuable life lessons that keep me strong. I can still be defiant but I'm not defiant just because, I do it because I choose too, for certain situations, just like anything else. Long story short, other people gave me the drive to find meaning in my life and by being apart of society I feel alive.
"Pick something up and carry it...., make it heavy enough so that you can think... yeah well useless as i'm at least I can move that from there to there"
I'm gonna do this And a few years later, when I'll actually have managed to do something with my life, I'm gonna come back on this video and like every comment
I am a 24 yr old Egyptian engineer living in Germany currently working as an intern in one of the greatest automotive companies in the world only because of Jordan Peterson words about how to behave like industrious people. This guy saved my life from complete destruction. It was right after my horrible experience in the middle thesis of my masters that I felt completely lost, weak and insecure. I felt like the dumbest person ever. I worked in a part time job as a cashier just to prove to myself that I can do something worthy and valuable. Sometimes I would feel I am not even an engineer. One day I had a really long day at work and we had a lot of annoying customers. I was completely down and depressed. It was an isolated industrial area in the forest, and the weather was freezing, and I had to wait at the train station for like 30 minutes. While waiting I looked up to the stars and wondered how I could end up here after years of studying!? At that moment I realized fuck it with any theoretical advises, I want any real practical actions that I find and I will follow starting from now! I opened my cell in the cold weather and carefully listened to a 6 minutes video of Jordan Peterson talking about industriousness behavior. His words completely changed my entire life. Since that day every single morning I set my daily goals, put a schedule and try to execute as much as possible. It is unbelievable how much one can achieve by just reformulating how we precieve tasks we have. There is a big difference between wanting to do something and having to do something. Setting goals means u want to achieve them and by achieving them u reward urself. Just amazing! Also amazing the power of planning on paper! I really want to thank Jordan Peterson for his guidance. Those are some valuable words, that I believe only Jordan Peterson have wanted to share with the people. He is a kind, strong and wise father, and his daughter should be proud of a father like that. He is my tony stark in the real world!
@@Karma-zx8qe Do you want people to follow the advice of the Bible? If so, should you not find it good that people would follow the same advice coming from Dr. Peterson? He has studied the Bible, and it is one of his sources of moral guidance.
This is an absolutely mind-blowing synthesis of what drives a man and extremely accurate towards how I am feeling at this point in my life (,Male, 36, stripped of just about anything I thought summarised me). The eye-opening part of this all to me is that, before viewing this, I actually figured out for myself that my personal motivation to keep on going through tough times, to be able to carry an inhumane load, to be able to go through the wall and back, actually came from the fact that I knew who I did it for and wich fulfilment taking on this role actually got ME in return. I have analysed this after long and endless conversations with my own mind, trying to figure out why I get to feel so miserable when this "status", or "how I am interpreted to those I love" gets taken away from me. However, I have always thought that the result this had on my mental health and thus the worth I value myself with in this life, was an abnormal interpretation of the importance of how my surroundings (including myself) experience my actions. Or at least that this was some kind of symptom that somehow find origin inside this adhd brain of mine. Mister Peterson, I am fully aware that you will probably never read this, but in the unlikely event that you somehow read this comment, I want to thank you. This may sound trivial, but the mere knowledge that I am NOT the only one to whom this is important, and that this is NOT abnormal makes me feel a fair bit less alien than before. THANK YOU... This revelation comes I a time it is needed most.... With the utmost respect, Niels, random 36 year-old from Belgium. 🙏🙏🙏
@THAT GUY Not sure if that's really what's going on. He's saying that most men crave that which you describe, and he's right. Men want the responsibility for a family of their own, men want a woman they can take care of. The problem is that a lot of men can't get these things anymore and women are partially to blame for that, because as you said because of feminism women wanted more and more, they don't want a man that still has shit to figure out, they want a man who's already there. Yet, a man can't get there if there's no woman and children to have that responsibility over. It's kind of paradoxal, I guess.
Its been staring us in the face most of our life. Women are thinking about marriage, the wedding and even how many kids they want....at eight years old in many cases. Meanwhile, guys in their early 20's still squirm at the very idea of any of those things.
@@wilhelmdietz4023 Hello. I keep hearing that Men want to be responsible for others whether through the protective and provision functions as traditional men were or through some other pathway, However if this were true, their responsibility would not need to be enforced. A man that wants the burden of responsibility for others does not need the threat of the might of the state. Should a woman's body and a woman's choice be a mans responsibility? If given the opportunity to abandon 'His responsibility' to others would he? The problem is not that men need responsibility.....It is that society needs men to be responsible for others.
I take it as what JP is meaning; "take some responsibility for yourself and your life or you'll despise yourself". He says, "Pick up a load and then you can tolerate yourself." And he finishes... "Grow the hell up and do something useful..... Responsibility, man, there's where the meaning in life is."
The amount of effort and emotion he puts into his talks is what makes these so interesting being that most of the teachers I’ve ever had were never this interesting
Hey guy, not sure if you've sorted it out the whole no-father thing. I am still trying to sort out my own issues with my mother. The greatest difficulty I've faced in this regard is trying to face the emotions deeply tied to that human being. It is remarkably difficult to handle these, so I strongly suggest you find someone that is willing to help you through them. I chose a psychologist personally, but find someone you can trust to work it out. There's nothing that I find more bothersome than the though "I would've loved to have been raised with a mom", and I imagine you can relate. Contend with these emotions, and resolve them.
cindy moore The best I’ve ever witnessed. My father was there but never emotionally available and out on business trips all the time and never said a damn thing unless it was a criticism.
Lara O'neal, I’m sorry that you went through that. Even as an adult, it would be So Fantastic to have a kind, loving Father. My father died when I was 2, which caused my Mom to turn to prescription drugs and alcohol. It was not an ideal situation, for Sure. We can still learn a lot from others, regardless.i hope you have a Beautiful Week. Take good care of you, and try to keep a Positive outlook, no matter what.😊♥️✌️
RoastedHamLLC fuck this is written and explained so well... I wish I was on pc to copy it or make a screenshot to save. Unfortunately I’m on mobile and have to make like 4 screenshots :p
This is not limited to men only- I’m thinking about my grandma who recently died… she got a PHD at Harvard, was a professor, devoted to writing and reading, raised four kids, but after retirement she still needed something to do. Up until she was 85 she was grading essays and editing for various authors. When she was no longer in a state to write and was succumbing to dementia, she would constantly ask “when can I write again?” or “what should I be doing?” We would always tell her that she had done enough, succeeded in education and work (especially for a woman back then), raised a great family, and that she could just rest, but that never satisfied her. When she lost being able to write, I think she lost her purpose and gave up the fight to stay alive. No human, man and woman, can live without purpose.
Grandma sounds like a highly conscientious person.. That immensely contributed to her industriousness and urge to achieve something... almost all the time
My father used to say: A man dies and goes to heaven, an angel greets him and explain that he can have anything. He wants a little farm to grow his own food. Angel says he can give him the food directly. No no, i want to work for the food. angel: sorry, you cant work here . man so wait, is this heaven or hell? angel: What do you think? ...(end)
This speech reminded me of the famous JFK quote: "Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country." People loved him for saying that, it's sad and inexplicable how this sort of thinking has gone away from our culture in recent years.
Very true. Theres a reason for it though. Politicans, while on their conquest for power and wealth, have decimated the will of the people socially, financially, even through education or lack there of. Slashing funding for the education. Discouraging people from being responsible because (we have a product that can do it for ya! Or a person)...on and on it goes.
It’s a slippery slope sadly. That idea works when the country has lots of people putting into the system. So you are getting stuff back because everyone is putting in. But the more people drop out and stop putting in, the less there is to reap.
Do men bear no responsibility when both parties have sex? Women just need to close their legs, but men shouldn't keep it in their pants? When a baby is conceived only women are to be held responsible? Men shouldn't be looked down on when they abandon their children, because women should close their leggs?
@@tearsofjoyforallthispain Uh yes its the woman who need to close there legs because last time i checked most men want to stay with the woman and keep the family together and the WOMAN are the ones wanting the divorce and taking off with the money. so clearly the woman are having kids half hazerdously and not the men. problem solving is not for you i cant believe how ignorant you are and irresponsible
@@GeraltOfRivia99 good god your attitude screams "angry virgin". Your views are so distorted it's unbelievable. I can't even wrap my head around the fact that someone of your stature and opinion could be found lurking in the comments of someone speaking so much wisdom and truth. You obviously have a strong hatred toward women that stems from a place deep within yourself that you need to sort out. You deserve better than to go through life looking for justification for your anger. I wish you well honestly, seems like that's uncommon for you.
@@tearsofjoyforallthispain Agreed. Men and women both bear responsibility for the woman becoming pregnant. In fact, I think men should recognize that they are more vulnerable in the sexual transaction. If a woman accidentally becomes pregnant from a one-night stand, she can decide to keep the child and get child support from the man for 18 years. Conversely, if they're in a relationship and he wants to have a baby, but she doesn't, she can abort the child. If a woman is murdered while pregnant, it's a double homicide. If she aborts a fetus with a heartbeat because it's inconvenient, she can do so and get applause. Think about the fact that a woman can decide if it's a human life or not, and we all bend to that. So yes, men should be even more vigilant of who they sleep with. Until men get some kind of reproductive rights such as financial abortions, they should be extremely careful.
in my experience, I've never thought of responsibility as the "meaning of life." To me it seems like most people view responsibility as a burden. Like when someone in their mid twenties says they miss being a teenager because there was no bills to pay, mouths to feed or jobs to wake up for. They just did whatever they wanted, and had fun. But personally, I agree with Jordan because I was without responsibility for a while after I lost my job last year, and I was constantly miserable. I felt like a burden to my family, I felt like a failure. But when I finally started working again, I felt so much happier. I never really thought of it this way until now. Obviously there's way more than responsibility that makes living life worth it, but maybe responsibility can be considered the core.
I asked my dying father the meaning of life, he dismissed me nevertheless saying, "go make a family". I never been so confused of my life as to as now.
@@Belmont1714 he'll never figure it out, none of us will ever figure it out cuz life is like gambling, you'll never know what you'll get so be prepared (im addicted to gambling btw)
@@trenwarYeah you're right the only gamble is not knowing whether it will work out or not. If it does then you'll be satisfied if not then you have to find another reason to live for. And I dare say to you, that I have figured out my life. And I will achieve these goals so help me God.
@@Ellis_B You're fucking right it's an opinion. Bearing a burden to prove that you're "better" than everyone else is bullshit--but, that's what a lot of men do. Have more kids. Work more hours. Run up debt. Work more hours. Have MORE kids. Repeat until you can barely stand it! Yeah, you'll have lots of responsibility. So what?
@@devilsoffspring5519 Its not about being better! Its about not being lost. Plus he said, YOU have a CHOICE. If you choose what you listed out, You are miserable. If you choose the right things, There, That is life.
"People will carry a load if they get to pick the load. Those who dont carry any load become like a sled dog without a sled to pull. You'll end up tearing pieces out of your own leg because youre bored. "
Notes from Underground taught me that is a fundamental aspect of human nature to love struggle and suffering, because without it, people would create chaos voluntarily just to alleviate the boredom, i.e. "tearing pieces out of your own leg because you're bored". Read at least the first half of the book, only 40 something pages, and you'll find Dr. Peterson vindicated.
@Sabata Koboekae This is why Peterson specifies that people want / need to carry a load *if they get to choose what it is* - a genuine choice inspired from what is meaningful to that individual, not the artificially limited selection late-stage capitalism provides and which Graeber's bullshit jobs would fall under. Both a lack of a load and an externally imposed load lead to nihilism in the end I think.
Dr. Peterson is the father I never had and I appreciate his guidance more than just words can express. Here is a brilliant person who gives meaning to life to so many! Thank You Dr. Peterson!
I don't think in India problem is lack of sense of responsibility. Indian men are already very responsible because our culture is shaped to make them. The problem is lack of opportunity, here people don't have as much opportunities as they have talent
@tob moe Im not sure it is an empty load man. Lifting weights got me out of depression. The gym gives a sense of accomplishments and good endorphine feels.
My wife when she was really strung out would ask me to pull my foreskin over my nose. Even with the neighbors there. I gotta lot of applause but also nasal congestion.
I come back to this video every so often and it reminds me that every last word of it is absolutely true and tangible in my life. It's so hard not to give up and it's so easy to forget this realization. I'm so glad someone in his position decided not to give in to the mainstream rhetoric and give a damn about individuals' quality of life
People my age (28) and younger seem to desperately avoid responsibility. My grandpa, a 90+ year old WWII vet, works every day raising horses because he wants to work.
Nogitsune I don’t think we avoid responsibility. We just simulate responsibility in things like video games and watching tv shows. We weren’t taught to be responsible in house maintenance or work. We got addicted to carrying a false burden.
Rafcity2001 I really agree with u. Lately, I have been playing video games nonstop and it gives me a fake sense of responsibility pride and a goal to work on, u feel me?
I'd like having responsibilities, at the same time I have an overwhelming anxiety whenever I have to assume something with an administration, mailing etc. I'm trying to be a man, but something in me is simply terrified by life.
@@Hulgore You are a man no matter what(except for turning transsexual). Being a man does not mean anything. Your anxiety maybe means that you are scared of doing something wrong which is a essential trait for responsibility. Men and women have to be aware of consequences.
He chose to take a political stance and people disagree with him. I myself disagree with him but there’s no doubt he has good ideas. I’m just saying you can’t be open about politics and not expect to be scrutinized no matter who you are or what you do.
@@jacknestor7305 they do a lot more than just "disagree with him". They attempt to shame him, label him, denounce him. Every interview he does with msm is started with "controversial" or "alt right hero".... They can't debate him, so its best to try deplatform him. Hence a number of talks in the uk were cancelled as a result of pressure from far left groups.
That's so true. He has said a great deal of financial inequality unstablizes society. Hes said there has to be a political side to look out for the actual disenfranchised at the bottom. As I can see, he's far from a fiscal conservative. I see little evidence of it, from a government interventionist way of looking at it. Socially, Identity politics isn't his thing, as far as I know, except to actually call out SJWs. SJWs aren't a new phenomena, it's 2019, Its not even so damn partisan anymore. He's called men with little personality or sexual appeal, losers, pathetic, etc. Yet, I hear people say hes a defender of the incel mindset, cause "incel" must equal man, which equals conservative, which equals alt-right. Sucks how gender itself has now political connotation. It's like he verbally reprimands the worst personification of what a man can be, time and time again, yet he's mistakenly viewed as being in support of it. Due to the trans speech activism he meddled with a bit, he's gotten crap from even left-centrists. He's attacked the c-16 bill on a philosophical statue more than the binary political way. I've yet to see him being the tool or monster they make him out to be.
Jack Nestor he even said he tries to speak logically on all things ( he only refused to call a man a she and vise versa so they got triggered ) if the left are offended or triggered then they should truly reevaluate their stance and the base of why they are truly angry .
I am a woman and I am spellbound by all of his talks/interviews. He is so clear with his words that when he debates, the interviewer's filter is exposed. Their own internal dialogue has a huge brick wall around it! He has such a clear lens. Responsibilty and sacrifice. Two beautiful things.
This is extremely fascinating, he's speaking directly to my circumstances. Especially around 8 and a half minutes in where Jordan says we live without purpose because we haven't seen the reward of taking responsibility.
Because you shouldn't hear this from school. You should hear it from your parents. Moving responsibility from parents to schools, is just another example of people being cryboys, and giving their whole life to the state (= politicians).
Because in school you don't realize what this means, you're still in your moms house, given free food, no real work, much free time.. You would hear that but wouldn't appreciate it. Till you get out in life experience fails than you will recognize the beauty of this
Jordan gets a lot of credit. He’s basically taking over the World. He is one of most watched people on RUclips an NYTIMES Best Selling Author and he sells out arena’s in nearly every city he goes to : WORLDWIDE!!! Thats a lot of credit Bro!
@Entrenched Mgtow "you cannot foist responsibility onto Men without the commensurate reward, respect, or authority." I aint considering refreshing my attitude towards responsibilities for social reward. I am considering it as an option for enhancing my own sense of well being, purpose and gratification.
@Bok ram Is your comment a serious one? Or are you trolling? There are some good points but fluffed out with too much unsubstantiated guff. a) Why would you suggest that being 'seen' by ANYONE is important at ANY age? b)If disappearing in other peoples eyes is so important to me, then I have already gone... c) I have had piles since I was 32 d) I started preparing for the 'end' when my mother died, when I was 8 years old. To live without regular reflection on death: that it is coming to us all; is not a life fully lived. Hope you can respond if you have something useful to add.
It's also never too late to become more mature and stop listening to manchild JP. social conservatism is not the answer to your problems but a symptom of them. Too bad at 59 your still such a child.
There's an amazing movie called "Ink", about demons and how they affect human life (metaphorically, of course). And there's a brilliant line there (i don't remember it word-by-word) - to destroy a man, you make it so that he has nothing to be proud about. A man without pride is done, he's just a wiggling mass. And It's incredible, after all these years since watching that movie, to hear the same thoughts but from completely different perspective of Jordan, where he calls that pride a responsibility.
Yes, it's very interesting. Good observation. As a volunteer motivational speaker and life coaching with prerelease inmates, mostly male, I taylor my presentation to the men to live honorably and to the women to own their worthiness and stop waiting for someone to fix t by sir shit.
"Women know what they have to do. Men have to figure out what they have to do. And if they have nothing worth living for, then they stay Peter Pan, and why the hell not. Because the alternative to valued responsibility is impulsive, low-class pleasure. That's another thing that we're doing to men and to boys that's a very bad idea: 'You're pathological and oppressive.' It's like 'Fine then, why the hell am I going to play?' If I get no credit for bearing responsibility, you can be bloody sure I'm not going to bear any. But then your life is meaningless and you're full of self-contempt and nihilism. That's what I think is going on at a deeper level in regards to men needing this direction." Brilliant.
"Women know what they have to do."...Have/raise kids. That's basically part of the point he is making here. That being said, I wonder how many of the women who see his lectures in person either do not want children or are unable to have children of their own.
@HAVE A LAUGH That's true but I don't see the need for him to not negate Women's struggle. Everyone is always talking about how Women struggle and etc. No one ever talks about what's wrong with Men, Jordan does though.
@HAVE A LAUGH Yeah you are right. I don't see it happening though as people are always divided and always have different opinions. Just human nature to do so.
I see in the fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables, slaves with white collars, advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of the history man, no purpose or place, we have no Great war, no Great depression, our great war is a spiritual war, our great depression is our lives, we've been all raised by television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars, but we won't and we're slowly learning that fact. and we're very very pissed off.
@@coop-us7tp Branding capitalism the demon rather than men taking responsibility for their own emotions and instead unleashing bitterness on the consumerist world around them, spreading fear and pointless existential angst, destroying rather than inspiring. It's a great story but the ideology is juvenile
This speaks to my soul. It seems ridiculous to say watching a stranger talk about how to get some meaning out of your life can actually change your whole mentality. I'm finally pursuing what I want to do for the first time in my life. Anyone watching this video who is feeling how I was I wish you the best fucking luck in the world in finding your meaning. Just an update - I now have a full time position as a science teacher. I'm not saying without jordan peterson I wouldn't be where I am today. But the years building upto my first comment I was so lost, addiction issues from childhood trauma. I made it my responsibility to change after watching jordan for a while. Once again, the best of fucking luck finding your meaning wether it be family or career.
I saw this video about 6 months after it was uploaded in 2018. After years of counseling and medication for depression, I realized that I didn't have a truly challenging load to bear.
So my wife and I stopped preventing and got pregnant with our first child that very month. Within 3.5 years, we had several more. My wife and I now have 4 sons ages 1-4, due to twins in the middle.
I haven't been to counseling or had medication in years. I did my best to be the most responsible person at my brother's unexpected funeral in 2021. I planned it all and gave the eulogy.
I gave up my personal "dreams" for my career in order to stay closer to home for the wife and kids.
These are the best decisions I've ever made. I'll always be thankful to Dr Peterson and thankful that this clip got uploaded. I believe God led me to it.
That’s great to here my friend. And I know from meeting JP that he would be extremely happy for you as well. Thanks for sharing.
@@AlexSwan Thank you so much for uploading this clip. So cool you got to meet JP! :)
There are many ways one could interpret this comment. Many likely share similar experiences in their own lives and can empathize with it. While others may not understand how you were able to give up so much freedom (aka: personal time typically spent finding ways to entertain yourself) and just accept a lifetime of responsibility. Of course, there's also the... less mature/'grown-up' crowd that disagree completely, fully believing they really can spend their entire lives doing nothing but having their idea of fun.
On a sidenote, what exactly did make you seemingly instantly decide to have children to give yourself "a truly challenging load to bear"? Had you and your wife already been discussing it beforehand, and discovering Dr. Peterson's video just served as that one little nudge you needed to be absolutely certain?
Love you dog, glad you got it under control. I'm sure trying.
Thank you for sharing
This is exactly why young men get addicted to video games. Video games _simulate_ responsibility by giving you a goal and making you, the player, solely responsible for realizing that goal. Video games are about heroism and success, which young men absolutely _crave_ and can't find in their real lives.
CountArtha sports on TV is the same thing as well
I’ve never thought of it like that. That makes a ton of sense
WoW in a nutshell.
Now I understand why I love Mass Effect. Simulated as it may be, I wouldn't give it up so easily. Gives my life some meaning.
that's wonderfully summarised.
"Useless as I am, at least I can move that from there to there!"
I don't know why, that makes me tear up. It's like the great cry of humanity
I found this video unexpectedly emotional for me too
It's not a coincidence I started lifting weights when I felt the most lost in my life. It gave me something to do every day. As useless as I am!
Wow you are handsome dude
@@Ray03595 Can confirm. I started exercising with my brother at home. And I feel like it gives me a purpose, or at least something to be proud of in these hard times
Read the life of Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him a perfect role model for men🙂watch spoken word the purpose of life.
That's why the 70 year old retired guy is out shoveling the snow from his driveway at 7:00 am. It gives meaning to his day.
Damn. I never even thought of that. Interesting.
Good point.
This is why making your bed the first thing you do is crucial. Then you shower and put on pants. You've accomplished something and you are ready to go.
IM ABOUT TO CRY
@@sortofanoakyafterbirth3661 what about exercising before shower? But you get too lazy to do exercise and waste all your day not getting to shower!
"Women know what they have to do, men have to figure out what they have to do." As a woman, I never would have realized how true this was until I had a baby. Instantly, I felt a profound sense of meaning and purpose that I cannot describe. While my husband can help me to a certain extent with the child-rearing, he has taken on the responsibility of being the provider for our family. For years before this I had rejected that men and women should have these particular roles. Now, suddenly, I understand. I try to tell my husband every day that I am grateful for his work and for everything he does to support our family. I know it is important for him to know that he is doing something with a purpose. I KNOW that caring for my baby has a purpose; I think he needs to be reminded sometimes that going to work every day is for a purpose as well. So I make sure to thank him.
I don't wish to sound patronizing but good girl!! He'll appreciate it
You the real MVP
Take a crown, actually take two
that's beautiful
It’s good that you realize this, we as men need that to keep us going. It will at least double what he is capable of contributing, and does contribute, to the unit.
I read a short story in my german class and it's about a boy who doesn't feel needed by anyone so he gets suicidal. But as he was trying to kill himself he reminded himself that he still had to get wood for his family so he went on to get that wood. The responsibility of getting wood for his family is what kept him sane , needed and alive.
I've been down some dark roads in my life. I can completely relate to your comment, and its scary on how many people need help and don't get it.
Well now imagine the boy has no responsibilities guess what happens next
can you remember what it's called or who the author is? I'd love to give it a read
@@user-jj3mo5vv7q It's called " Das Holz für morgen " from Wolfgang Borchert. Here's a link of a website just scroll down until you see it : mondamo.de/alt/borchert.htm
@@racingrex3012 thank you!
Jordan: "You know I was watching the Simpsons the other day"
Me thinking: *nice, he likes to chill as well sometimes*
Jordan: "AND I DECONSTRUCTRED IT"
XD
hahahahahhaha
Lol
😂 😂 😂LOL! I love it! 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
Hahahaaaa yep
Peterson: * asks himself a question *
Also Peterson: That's a good question!
T Peterson it’s what makes a good philosopher
😂
Both pertersons are you
700
I love that too😂
I once asked my father how he gets up and goes to work every day (physical labor job that I hated doing with him when I was younger). He replied "When you have a family that depends on you, and you love them, you are happy to do it".
Now that I'm an adult and have met someone I want to spend my life with, I'm beginning to understand what he meant. It's so, so true.
Sounds like your Dad was top bloke …
@@NickRowsell fortunately, he still is!
I woke up from a dream i was living at 23, and now im in panic mode, i feel huuge void inside myself, calling for help wont do much becasue nobody can fill that. I am alive and taking part in life. I cant accept that yet, it is so hard for me. I need to take part in society and have motiviation to live, nobody told me how it really looks like, this reality. Nobody. I was lied. I cant bear it.
This is beautiful
God bless you, man. I hope one day I can meet someone like that.
I'm Japanese and this is exactly what my high school teacher told me in his lecture on literature. JP's argument holds universally.
he must be a fan of JP lol
The same argument from two different kinds of JP.
@@keepmovingforward8821 most people who say they're from japan are weebs in the US ofc
Thank you
Or, or, get this... Jordie is unoriginal.
I'm almost 45, yet the guy is still teaching me how to live.
I even shed a tear with this one.
He amd jocko willnick are the men that we need today. Especially when a vast majority of the media and politicos are attacking men.
@Jay why u say that
“Men are made , women are born.” -RP 101
@@dangc8315 he's projecting
@Jay crying makes you a beta ?
Jordan Peterson is like the stepdad who actually cares about you
He's like the stepdad that calls you a piece of shit, and then shows you how not to be a piece of shit.
AHH ..... NO !!
damn that's a freudian slip if I have ever seen one
@@starsky1012 but I am
EndMySuffering of course you are
If I had Jordan Peterson as my teacher, I'd never miss a class
Me too
Just go to class dude!!
Are you missing class right now?
Clearly you didn’t read Peterson’s book or you’d know, everyone has something to teach anyone and anyone can learn something from everyone. Stop being proud, maybe your professor majors in Peterson psychology
@@jensandersen8728 but this is free
Petition to call Jordan Peterson.
“ Internet Dad” from now on
you have my shield !
JP is like the dad I never had. Also you have my bow!!
And MY ass!!
daddy
@@tobsw3802
Noone wants you, ass.
5:30 "Pick something up and carry it. Make it heavy enough so you can think: useless as I am, at least I could move that from there to there"
I love this quote.
I do too. It actually brings tears to my eyes for some reason...
Maybe thats why I was a bodybuilder my entire life
🤷♂️
Pick up your cross daily and follow me… for what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul 🤔
@@chimesquare that verse instantly entered my mind when he said pick something up and carry it. It also reminded me of “my yoke is easy and my burden is light”
Weird how a lot of Dr. Peterson’s points go back to biblical principles
@@curlywhites I think it’s because it’s inspiring when you meet someone who is determined to make a difference no matter how limited their potential.
I’m a 19 year old male sitting at home during the COVID-19 lockdown and this video hit me hard man
I am 32 and I was u back then and did nothing.
Take this as a warning.
Pick a living. And get out there and live it and work hard for it.
Dont be me.
Dean Moore Thank you for sharing that. Well it’s really hard to do anything nowadays since the whole world is still under this crisis you know? I’m starting school again in September but I’m not excited at all ‘cause everything is going to be online so I’m not gonna get the “freshman experience” you know? School doesn’t even really motivate me at all because the way I see it you’re doing the same thing as everyone else but the main objective is to do it better than everyone else. Even though you might think differently, but I’m sure you’re not that bad!
@@jordantatham6634 I wish u well in school and life and hope the good mans wise words stay with u. Your in my prayers tonight young buck.
Samuel Prince what have u been doing to keep busy?
Trust me, don't listen to anything JP has to say. Just do what makes you happy and work hard towards that goal. If you really listen to JPs lectures he is just a pity party and has absolutely no solutions to anything he has to say. Whenever he's asked a question he never has an answer. he doesn't actually have anything profound to say don't listen to him he'll just make your life miserable. He never offers any real solutions on how to get established in life. So don't listen to him instead work hard save money and invest money now, I promise you won't regret it.
I’m 19 yr old female living in Iraq and Jordan Peterson has helped me more than my parents and feminism
I could help you a lot deeper. You’d never be the same.
👷🏼👮🏼♂️👨🎨👨🏼✈️🧛🏼🧖🏼♂️🤷♂️
@@trevlindramquez5928 lol what?
Trevlind Ramquez Weird ppl in internet...
@@trevlindramquez5928 What?
@@trevlindramquez5928 How high can YOU count?
"The alternative to valued responsibility is impulsive, low-class pleasure"
Pure Gold!
@tony montana you should learn that dw about other people my guy
Like video games
@@KENNETHTXMMA your life sounds exhausting, but if you found happiness then good for you. After all obtaining happiness is the meaning of life, your happiness may be different than mine but I am sure we share some common ground as well. So i will keep in mind some of your recommendations.
@@KENNETHTXMMAliving by pursuing things that are meaningful regardless of whether it makes you happy is a commendable way of living, I guess people who live like this are the same people that are capable of writing the next great American novel. But just how many successful people have tell us in their dying beds their regrets in life, they regret becoming successful at the expense of relationships, family, friendship they felt as if they hadn’t really lived, they regret postponing their happiness in order to achieve something meaningful. Don't get me wrong you seem to be a laser oriented guy with a clear goal in mind but not all of us are willing to sacrifice happiness for success. When I die I am sure I will have my good share of regrets but I don't want a "why did I invest so much of my limited time in this world trying to achieve xyz instead of my own personal happiness"
I have low class impulse pleasure with my girlfriend xd
Can you imagine if the camera hadn’t been there? And all this was lost to the wind?
@Aro aro2220 it's crazy to think about how much knowledge and men like peterson we've lost and or forgotten
@Wayne H Because everything shall, in time, be replaced with something better.
man how many meaningful conversations have been lost
And it's why today is such a legendary day. With the internet, we can make it big boys
I know right! and how about that internet right??? God bless video cameras and the internet dude!
"Useless as I am, at least I can move that from there to there."
This gives me chills. It speaks to me.
Take minor progressive responsibilities brother and analyse how you feel in a week ❣️
I agree that hit hard to me man
If there is someone searching the minutage, JP say that around 5:35
@ Thank you, brother
Everyone is saying he’s a genius and he’s incredible. That’s how desperate our society is for a male role model.
Jordan appears to be a normal, mentally stable man giving simple even-keeled advice. It’s refreshing for all of us because we’re so used to the Tony Robbins, Will Smith’s etc. who push extravagant wealth and extreme lifestyles and tactics (grind all day, work yourself to the bone, or wake up at 4:30 am and drink blended spinach everyday.)
Jordan is just the simple, honest man who has been married to the same woman for years and years. Basically he’s the responsible, mentally healthy father we wished we all had.
There’s no gimmicks or fancy clothes or cars or trail of cheating, affairs, broken lives. He’s real.
BobbySpasmoid 2Rice Hmm it’s really about the state of society in general. Women are of equal blame, absolutely!
His IQ is 144 which would literally by definition make him a genius. Not a lot of people on this planet have taught at Harvard. Using the words "Genious" and "Incredible" to describe him doesn't exactly scream desperation for a role model. Admiration and respect are two entirely different things.
@@mattbedforth9569 Lots of academics who believe in extremely nutty ideas have IQs well within that range; indeed I think many of his peers fit this description. They wouldn't be called geniuses for cogently stating their beliefs.
Gabriella G. -I love your comment.
Gabriella G. Except for and IQ of 148-152 which he does
I've been suicidal for about 6 years now, tried it way too many times and failed miserably, destroying my life even further. I never knew why I wanted to die so badly and none of the therapists could help me understand it either.
Now this guy, doesn't know me, never met me, doesn't talk about me, but helped me more than anyone else ever did.
Edit (Update): Didn't really expect much traction from a comment like this, just wanted to show my appreciation for jp tbh, but thanks for the kind words anyways.
I've been ''sober'' (if one can call it that) from suicidality for almost a year now, in the end it just came down to finding some sort of purpose/responsibility. Not saying it fixed my issues all togheter, but it's definetly getting better.
Thank God your attempts weren't successful. You're being set up for great things, Nitrolav. When you look back on your life, you'll remember these videos as a turning point for when things got better. You'll get it!! Best to you on your journey
@@shreklol960 is that a serious question
Literally the same here, no help from psychiatrists or counsellors.
Fu.k Death
@@shreklol960 "Death, is a natural part of life"
- Yoda
The whole lecture is essentially telling you to find something to be responsible for so that life doesn’t feel like self indulgence and self loathing for lacking a purpose or passion
That's indeed a very good summary. But i would just remove the passion thing. It's part of living in the 21st century to feel purposeless. It's something we haven't been able to cast down yet successfully as a society. But I don't think finding something to be responsible for is a quest to fill a void that real-world-passion left unfilled. It's more about filling the void of purpose that a lot of people feel when they're not religious or deeply spiritual, but then again, not because they're not passionate.
Add0805 well that’s completely false because feeling purposeless is NOT just a 21st century problem considering people have been killing themselves for 100s of years for no reason. Samurai would kill themselves if they lost in battle because they lost their purpose for living
Jon Gardner well he saying to find something and give it meaning so that you have to be responsible. Thats how you find purpose in your own life. That doesn’t make it the exact reason we exist but it allows us to continue to exist without feelings of self hatred or distaste for the long boringness of life without reason
is that why so many Republicans hate women? That's their chosen purpose in life?
Zenon republicans dont hate women at all. What republican policies hate women? Can you name some?
This video changed my life 3 years ago. I'm still not where I want to be, but it was a beggining of a journey
glad to hear that. Hope things are well.
Tell us more
"if you have a 'why' to live, you can almost bear with any 'how'" - Nietzsche
Lol key word "almost"
@@devinbarnes7381 almost is still better than can't...
@@alphaxfang ahhhh you slick fuck, gave me a smile :)
the problem is I HAVE NO WHY
Somebody need to get rickrolled
"Disagreeable men won't do anything they don't wanna do. They just say 'up yours'. 'I'll go home and binge Jordan Petersons lectures'"
😂😂😂😂me
😩😩😩
Hey don't expose me like that
I feel personally attacked 🤣🤣🤣
I disagree
I've followed this advice since this video came out. It genuinely has helped me in so many ways, but I wanna caution anyone who takes this to heart. Responsibility does give meaning, but I've taken it too personally and its resulted with me equating my worth with my degree of responsibility. If I'm not productive - even if it's just for a day - it makes me feel worthless. Do what he says and define goals and assume responsibility, but simultaneously approve of your character and give yourself breaks. As long as you set goals and actively work towards them, you should be proud of yourself, but never let your level of productivity define the worth of your personality and life. Breaks are okay.
damn right! thank you for this reminder.
taking responsibility without a strong character and/or self esteem is like taking a heavy load without any exercise. i don't want to deter anyone from taking responsibility. but never forget to train on your self esteem and self respect and self love etc. otherwise you forget about yourself and live only for that what you took responsibility for, be it a task or a person or sth completely different.
Responsibility is a long term matter. Being a parent, for example, is a life time calling. Measuring achievement on the scale of a single day is impossible. You can’t beat yourself up for a failure over a single day, because the failure is a learning experience that can benefit you for a lifetime.
Great way to put it. I feel like all arguments and discussions about any topic, if you go deep into it, lead to the same conclusion I've assimilated throughout the years from eastern ancient philosophies: Moderation. The middle way. People should strive to find balance in all things. The only argument I've found against this is that life becomes dull if you don't experience the highs and lows from time to time, but that's the key - only sometimes.
But that mid point position should be aligned as default. I can say I've felt way more light (mentally and emotionally) and at ease with the universe, with myself and with mortality since I've gotten a bit more acquainted with philosophy and psychology (science and technology being my primary interests) and made myself able to get to that realization, partly thanks to a few psychedelic experiences that acted as a catalyst also. I truly believe the answers lie within ourselves, but we have to sacrifice some things in return. Nothing is free but our imagination. Humanity as a whole, as well as every individual, both need to take responsibility and tread a more sensible, compassionate and respectable path towards a synergetic existence with nature. Finally, it's imperative to give personal meaning to the world and to life, since reality is more subjective than we think.
It's easy to stir away from that "center" and we often do it in an intellectual or emotional way, but it's of utmost importance to keep ourselves open to subjects while staying true to personal principles of meaning, moral and quality, altogether questioning, feeling and reflecting upon anything that life throws at us. On that note, it seems that individuality is paramount to genuine satisfaction. People should develop and cultivate it, be it through honing skills (mechanical aspect) or through creativity (organic aspect). That's why art, aesthetics and symbols are such important languages in my opinion.
Reminds me of what i was reading in a perfectionism thing. On achievment,
Underrated comment!
I listen to JBP several times a week, and he makes so much sense almost all the time. I wish I heard his wisdom 40 years ago. I intuited a lot of it, some of it came from family, but I stumbled around like a fool and sometimes still do so. The way he phrases his (commonsense) wisdom matters. JBP is a course for my son in homeschool. My son isn't a big reader, so he's reading summaries of both his "rules" books but I supplement the lessons with podcasts and videos. He's made a huge difference in our lives, particularly because my son has always struggled to find a strong male figure who matters.
Today is my brother's birthday. He died 50 years ago this year at age 9. Afterward, my parents were in a deep depression and my father was close to suicide. What saved him? Responsibility to his wife and two remaining children. He will often say, "Responsibility is everything." He's right.
what happens when men don't feel like they want to take on responsibility because they get nothing from it? ... but more like are worse than they were before
8:11: “The alternative to valued responsibility is impulsive low class pleasure”
powerful statement
porn and league of legends, food...
be a president or fuck off, dont watch the game on tv or drink a beer with your friends.
@Entrenched Mgtow Indeed this is true especially in western culture, but its slowly bled into eastern civilizations too. Women have been systematically destroying a way of life that we'd had for centuries, that is where a man is the provider and the woman is the caretaker. The thing is that corporations have been in great support of women entering the workforce because it means increasing the labor pool and creating more profit for those companies. I've looked at it from both perspectives, and as a man i cannot fathom why women don't want to have a cozy coddled life being a full time wife, instead insisting on competing with men in the workplace.
Ground breaking
I really like my impulsive low class pleasures. Problem is, that to finance them, I need to act responsible. 🤣
Luckily I only have a job to worry about, not a bunch of kids and a crazy baby mama.
I was in a dark place in my life. My life was a mess. As much as I tried, I couldn't get out of bed, I was in great depression in my life. Watching Jordan Peterson's online lectures, I started little by little. After two years, little by little, I managed to have personal responsibility, to have a vision for my future. You really helped me a lot. Thank you very much Mr. Peterson.
Pablo I'm so happy you're better. Peterson is indeed inspiring and has lots of interesting ideas.
He really helped me too. I was in a trajectory for chaos with self destructive behaviours and he helped me out of that.
@@LostTumbs "women are so selfish they don't listen to mens problems" well at least you're not stereotyping. No-one is trying to change anyone's personality, not sure which comment you're even replying to.
@@LostTumbs That's not what feminism is about, not in the slightest. You're misguided and hurt I understand. I'm sorry for whoever hurt you in order to take your irrational anger out on the rest of us who actually care about men and women equally. Keyword equally. No facts from you just your opinion. If you truly knew about statistics you'd also mention that women are discriminated against in work environments, slut shamed more than men, paid less, forced into children marriages with a lower chance of education. Not to mention period cramps, risk of dying in labor (biological difference but still). Do you wanna be a woman? Go ahead, get a sex change and face all these things.
@@LostTumbs In Bangladesh and other countries children are force into marriages. Open your eyes!
My biological father taught me nothing about being a man. These videos help exponentially.
Same for me
He didn't know how because it wasn't taught to him either.
@@regaininglife9084 agreed...
At least they didn,t ditched us...
That should count for something.
Same here im 15 but he still didn't leave me
@George Washington yes u are right I dont blame him because his dad died at 5
Can you believe they actually tried to cancel this wonderful man? One of few shining beacons for millions of lost men, (and women) and somehow amongst the brigade of disgusting celebrities we could pick from, he came under fire.
I just hope JP somehow knows that we all see and appreciate the intrinsic value in what he does.
Yes. He's exactly the type of person they have to cancel.
@@TheBaconator1347 because he speaks too much truth?
Only a fool tries to cancel JP.
@@TheBaconator1347 Spoken like a weak liberal.
@@ragv435 Im a nasty sinful bastard. and apparrently im no where near as evil as a leftist. because I wouldnt cancel the truth. although I want to kill myself for how edgy I am at least the truth makes me realize theres still light at the end of the tunnel damn those bastards motherless lonely fools who cancel the truth.
"That's the counter culture. Grow the hell up and do something useful." The truth of that just slapped me right in the face.
Its hard, but its better than hearing it from your parents
Sometimes thats all you need
I felt an urge to diaree with him lol. ;-;
but what do we do when all the useful jobs are done by machines? That is the way we are heading right now! Society is becoming mechanically autonomous of its makers!
@@NostalgicHearts your right..because we rerally need a society exclusivly populated by mechanics don't we?! I just hope there will be about 100 mil vancancies to go round lol!
As a male. Jordan speaks to me. Guys need someone to look up to and tell them they're making mistakes. Thank you for helping with my depression and the stresses of life.
They also need someone to tell them that they aren’t the bane of modern existence: the boogeymen of society. Jordan is one of the few people actually encouraging young men and he does it not at all at the expense of young women
Your depression and stress in life is natural living in a slave society. You’re feeling that way because deep down you know this isn’t how humans are supposed to be living. And you’re right. We have been dragged to this place by sociopaths with all the money.
Good for you man. Stay on the path. Pickup a load and bear it.
@@MicoRich you are probably in the part of society with moat money, because only rich people think about such things that often
"Gods Truth" lies in this video-title and of course
the c-section. Its so full of truth and bless,
its amazing:
ruclips.net/video/FdU2Bol04tI/видео.html&lc=Ugyywq6hpNY_2Vfq5vN4AaABAg
Here, have this URL to a comment AND a Video, both in once.
Have Fun!
Internet dad taught me more about life than my biological father.
I'm in the same boat man.
savagegiraffe1 watch his series man specially the biblical one
Same here
Mine too
I don't want to be the grammar nazi, but I'm gonna be the grammar nazi.
taught*
I'm a woman and LOVE your videos! I was raised primarily by my disabled father: a "Greatest Generation" veteran of WWII, and had the common sense, insight and honorable traits that you teach and was also an exceptional evaluator of people and human nature, with a high level of intuition and foresight. After 62 years of life on this planet, my conclusion is that, compared to the man who raised me, the average american (both male and female) is undisciplined, entitled, lazy, and tend to be resentful of those who aren't. Thank you for being a fabulous role model and virtual father figure for so many who don't have a good one. Keep up the good work - the world needs your insight!! Sending blessings to you and your family and am so glad to know that you seem to be on the other side of recent health challenges.
As a 31 year old stepfather I'm inclined to agree. I grew up with a great grandfather who was well respected and helped in building the entire small town he lived in. I believe that a major difference from then to now is comfort. I try and teach my kids to be the best they can be. In doing that it forces me to be the best example of that I can conceive. The difference between the generations seems to be comfort. I cannot teach them to be strong in the face of uncomfortable things when everything around them is seemingly built for comfort. Same as when I was growing up. I just happened to join the marine corps after school and became strong in the face of danger and uncomfortability. To instill these values to young generations, there will have to be a huge adversity to overcome and I'm afraid of what it will be.
more women need your attitude instead of the pink pussy hat wearing idiots waving signs for their "rights"
Go figure i found the meaning of life on youtube at 3 am.
🤣 right on man👍🏼
Pickup a load...and carry it!!
same!
I literally just readied your comment and looked at the hour it was exactly 3 am lol
Wow, same here. Lol
Rip to the dude who had eyecontact during the "YOURE USELESS" segment. Hope he has picked up responsibility in later times (:
verbally minced into a fine paste
Lmao
😂
I noticed that too and felt awkward for the poor person lol
Steffen Ljosheim responsability without authority is slavery.
Dont let jordan peterson drag you back into the Bs contract that is today marriage and family life
My dad wouldn't really teach me anything about life.. just yelling and calling me stupid. It took me years to dig myself out of that mindset.
My dad was a very detached man but her tried to teach me and I wish when he spoke I had paid more attention. Now it's time to teach my young ones.
I can relate to this. My dad isn't a bad man, I was just a very difficult child and it seems like he just gave up at some point and stopped teaching me, except for the times he criticized me. I am still trying to dig myself out of that mindset but I'm progressing. Awareness is half of the battle, once you're aware of it you can begin working on it. Thanks for writing something relatable. Take care, I wish you well
My dad also called me names growing up. Stupid, dumbass, loser, and always referring to me as Mark, my alcoholic degenerate uncle. This really really sticks with me hard to this day. My dad taught me expressing anger was ok. I resent that aspect. But my father also taught me to work hard. Playing baseball for so many young years, he said. "You're not going to be good at one position, but learn to play all positions". That aspect has been a huge part of me. At any and every job I want to learn everything I can. All I want to do is make my dad proud, I know he is now. But it never feels like enough. It's this wicked game I play in my own head. Unfortunately i cant share this with my dad, because it will crush him. He didnt know any better raising kids at such a young age, with no solid parenting in his life. So as bad or as hard as it may be I'm still grateful for his presence and the live he gave me.
@@Iamtherealflip I think some form of abuse was common with boomer parents and gen x parents. I and alot of people I know where either verbally or physically abused. My parents weren't the best but the tried. You can do it. The insecurity and self doubt this causes is astronomical
@@BinaryBlueBull my parents gave up on me at some point too. I couldn't keep my grades up, I wanted to do what I wanted. Drugs, sex and the like. I lost my dad when I was 19, he was 41. That was a while ago, and me and my mom have gotten very close since then, even though our relationship when I was young was rocky at best.
It's amazing how people have paid a university lots of money to listen to his lectures, and here I am listening to it for free.
It's the speed and value which you place on it if you can get this lesson before everyone else you've been able to apply it before the masses even know it's relevant
This guy is like the model father figure. It is almost scary how right he is about all this.
@Michael P
J.P. would disagree.
dont fully trust someone's words boy, never.
Michael P my dad is great and huge positive influence in my life...but yea maybe you are right as my dad is from Guatemala haha
It is scary
@Michael P mine died last year.... i agree...........
Being a 26 years old male with no family my mind is BLOW TO HIGH HEAVEN. This man makes a lot of sense. Thank you for the wisdom
It’s okay man. I’m 26 too, about to finish my studies next month. If you sort yourself out now in the coming months, you’re more than fine. We’re so Damn Lucky to have bump into this genius on time. Very lucky. Watch a JP video a day keeps the existential suffering away.
same here,26 and male. but i do have family. you can do this my King,stay focused
😔 Sorry
I'm a 27 year old female and have accomplished a lot but feel like I have to play in a man's game to be able to make my own living since I don't have a family.
@@Heightofacloud Hey Christina, maybe you can married me :) I'm 20 and single.
Lesson of the lecture: Responsibility gives life meaning.
But he wants men to get married ...........but he foolishly ignores how divorce steals everything he works for all his life. Take responsibility and run your own business. If employed learn how to invest your savings judiciously instead of blowing it up foolishly.
I just saw one of his talks that address marriage.
Misquoting him a little bit but...
"Vows are a form responsibility. It's a bottom line rule: I'm not going anywhere, you're not going anywhere, we can't run from our problems so we might as well work it out."
When my first daughter was born my wife was so focused she was an inspiration to me. She knew exactly what to do and how to do it. I felt completely lost, I felt like a third wheel. My wife was in complete control of the situation inside the home. I had no purpose inside the house except to be a good dad to my daughter but that was the fun bit. We were renting our home at the time. One morning when my daughter was about 6months I had a realisation that my role here was to do everything I could to facilitate my wife to care for our child and the best way I could do that was to buy a home for us. My eldest daught is now 9. In that time I got enough money together to get a deposit for a house, buy the house, pay off the mortgage in full and buy another 2 houses which we now rent out. 9 years ago I was a cad technician in an engineers office earning a pretty miserable wage. I got an engineering degree 6 years ago and built an engineering business which is now thriving. I figured out my purpose, my role, my responsibility. That morning I figured that out was the best day of my life apart from the days my daughters were born. My eldest daught now when she's not in school is with me all the time even when I work. Everything is possible when you know what it is you need to do. The best thing you could do is figure out what it is you need to do and this is worth spending alot of time pondering.
"Responsibility, man... that's where the meaning of life is."
... for males.
saamohod I didnt think you listened to the lecture. Responsibility is for both sexes, but women find that easier, not to mention they are child rearers which ia a big part of what they look forward to. Men dont have that.
kevmolio rights rights rights rights. Blahblahblahblah. This is you. Man the fuck up.
catchlightdame you obviously dont know the male biological predisposition.
reiwell del fucking everything that has boobs and moves?
I'm 37 years old, male. I think he just solved my 'mid life' crisis...
Responsibility pick up a load and carry it
@@jamesireland6606, couldn't agree with you more.
A mid-life crisis seems like an evaluation after 20 years or so of working on life goals. It can be a good tool. Imagine never evaluating how life is going.. Just a random person's thoughts.
@@michaelharvey7254, thanx, I came to a very similar conclusion. Like Socrates said; Wonder is the beginning of Wisdom. Imagine what hell it would be if you go through life without self assessment and only realize it on your deathbed.
@@jsunday6750 💯
For many people he is conservative and blunt, who speaks politically incorrect statement. But for me, he speaks the real shit.
Hats off to you man. Respect from India.
cp1307 he speaks a fundamental psychology, what a human was created for
Only the unresponsible people who JP talks about care about political correctness.
@@icoivo5529 I'm very liberal, but yeah he is speaking the truth!!!
Its psychology, it all comes in, can't blame him
More respect from India
I am so blessed to have had a father that taught me to work hard and respect women. Responsible for livestock, your horse and dog ect. I have a highly successful son in farming and cattle with 3 young sons. Married to the same woman for 50 years. What else could one ask for at this time in life.
man here, lost, but using you to find my way back. Thank you
Angel Herrera Good on ya, brother. Never too late to start cleaning up your room!
If you ever ask yourself what's the point… You get to be a roadmap for everyone else that shares your struggles in the future, even if nobody ever knows your name.
Lost is only antonymous to found when speaking about objects. You're reading all of that into what he said, or out of what he said.
he is sending you back to the plantation. Find something you enjoy doing and do it for yourself. Work on your self, get your personal needs fulfilled, then move forward while checking wetter anything improves your life, and only take on burdens that have a positive outcome for yourself, that is how you find the way back to you
Angel Herrera
1) Nothing about life will ever be fair. Erase the kindergarten idea of fairness from your mind. Be the best you that you can be and be happy for other people's accomplishments and blessings.
2)Learn that attitude is a choice and you can choose to be happy no matter your circumstances. You cannot control what life throws at you but you have 100% control over how you choose to respond to it.
3)Live beneath your means. Practice self discipline more so than self indulgence. Be humble and kind.
4)Hard work does not guarantee success. Hard work builds character but it doesn't pay well. Smart work pays well. You can work hard pushing against a brick wall all day but no one is looking to hire wall pushers. Be prepared to take advantage of opportunities that may come.
5)Life goes by fast. Don't be so driven in your career that you miss out on spending as much time as you can with your family and especially your kids. Play with them when they ask you to, answer their questions, leave your cell phone in the car when you get home. Don't assume you'll live to old age and that there will always be tomorrow.
6)Work daily on having a magnetic personality. Be a positive person. Try not to gossip or ever say something bad about someone else. Have a firm handshake, look people in the eye, smile, learn to have excellent communication skills, remember people's names, don't dress like a slob, be punctual, show an interest in the interests of those you meet.
7)Don't take everything so serious. Hard times don't last. Be chill when others would be pitching a fit. Life knocks everyone on their butt, losers curl up in the fetal positon and think that they are just unlucky and destined to endure nothing but shit, winners shake it off and man up. When the chips are down that is when you see what someone is made of.
8)Always be learning something and making progress at being better at something. People are always happiest when they are in the process of accomplishing something.
9)Appreciate the small things that no one else does. There is beauty all around. One man's chicken is another man's steak. It's all about perspective.
10)You will fail, but you don't have to be a failure. Every day is an opportunity for a fresh start and another go with a deeper resolve.
This why army is so appealing to some guys. It gives you the purpose. You don’t have to decide anything since people above would decide it for you. Just follow orders, be useful and take pride in this. Sad, isn’t it? But it makes life so much easier
Actually there's a lot more than that. You might want to think on it a bit more.
@@JB-wh4cn mate, in my country military service is compulsory, had a whole year to think about that. There is this patriotic feeling they try to implant in your head and it sustains you for a while but the more you there the less it works for some of us.
Correct
Not true. Men in general are naturally competitive and the military provides an opportunity to display our intelligence and strength among other men. Also Men who join the military understand that we are ones who have to fight the wars and battles not our women.
@@JB-wh4cn military absolutely preys on people who don’t feel they have purpose and also why they target low income populations.
Well I’m the 15% and I’m a woman and I love listening to you. Absolutely love it. Thank you
Need to pump those numbers
You also liked the fact that he said that your responsibilities are having infants and taking care of them? Because that is something feminists don't really seem to want to hear (not that I'm calling you a feminist)
Do you know what to do with your life?
@@wilhelmdietz4023 where exactly did he say that?
She's not alone. Think about it, women have been oppressed in one way or another for centuries. In the grand scheme of things women's rights and stuff is still evolving. Agreed it goes to the extreme. But both the sexes have to understand each other and not compare or compete. He's right biologically each have their role to play we have to understand that and work together considering that as a starting point. At this point women are operating on "fight" mode because in the past we've operated on "flight". Years of societal conditioning on gender roles. But that is not an excuse to move the identities,rights,roles,responsibilities of men/boys. As women we need to put in the work to understand the how the whole set up of society works because we weren't a part of the minds that constructed it. He's right we need to listen to all sides and take responsibility for this. A superficial study with shouting "rights" helps no one. In essence, it's worthless and won't hold strong. The 15% will grow but it'll take time the bandwagon effect will happen eventually. In the meanwhile empathise, use logic and don't hate. Understand
I want to offer my opinion. As a man, when you talked about the responsibilities as man, I held my head high through out the rest of the video. I watched my father thrown away his life for his work for the family. I only know what he did was very noble and I want to follow his foot steps. But this lecture put it in to words. I am deeply appreciated. Thank you very very much.
I was having a conversation with my siblings and one of them said, I could never do what you do, youre working 60 hours every week, why do you do it. I said because I have a family that depends on me, children who will need help with college. Most of being an adult is about doing what you must, not what you want. It sounds sad, but it's not, it feels good providing and being a protector.
just imagine if you HELPED your father do his responsibilities, he may have been around for you right now. . instead you were playing vid games and chewing bubble gum :)
@@kantraxoikol6914 A lot of assumptions made there with no supporting evidence.
Please people don't say that is the advice you take away from this, why would throwing your life away working be the answer. You have one life and your children will be much happier having memories with you in them. Sometimes you have to work hard long hours to make it by but don't idolize that kind of life.
@@torterrapin4719 Although I can't say that I disagree with you. Given the option available at the time, I still believe that his decision is the best option. Our situation were very restricted.
"For men, there is nothing but responsibility."
So damn true.
Chris Rock said in his stand up show once "Only women, children and pets are loved unconditionally, men have to earn it"....and if that ain't a sad side not to your comment!....
@@tyrozinehappykitchen We've no choice
@@tyrozinehappykitchen How old are you don't mind my asking?
@@tyrozinehappykitchen Making the world a better place can be seen as (in-)valid as your examples of a materialistic person wanting to accumulate more material. Living in a van with a hot chick could make you happy, for many people a life like this is not only undesirable but also impossible, because maybe vans don't exist where you life, or you are to poor to afford one, or you are gay and have no interests in girls. None of this shit matters ̶u̶̶n̶̶l̶̶e̶̶s̶̶s̶̶ ̶̶y̶̶o̶̶u̶'̶r̶̶e̶̶ ̶̶m̶̶a̶̶k̶̶i̶̶n̶̶g̶̶ ̶̶t̶̶h̶̶e̶̶ ̶̶w̶̶o̶̶r̶̶l̶̶d̶̶ ̶̶a̶̶ ̶̶b̶̶e̶̶t̶̶t̶̶e̶̶r̶̶ ̶̶p̶̶l̶̶a̶̶c̶̶e. Leave out the last part and you have a generalizable statement. Is it peer pressure to want to be happy? How can we be sure that this is not just another social cognition? Does your body peer pressure you with sending signals to your brain that force you to satisfy your needs?
@Sasori Tobi I see your point of view, personally speaking I've witness and experienced women love kids and pets more than their men, or men in general. I've come to a bit've a conclusion it all goes back to biology, with both sexes really when you think about it, we're both driven by innate biological traits, it's just a case of how self aware and educated each individual is to this to exert self control and higher thinking and reasoning: Men not to want to go out and f*ck everything that moves but to self improve build a good life and range women on their list of goals in life by looking for quality over quantity, women not to become sluts and climb the hypergamy ladder before they hit the wall and leave themselves out in the cold in finding a quality parter by always searching for the ideal or continuing to see men as a utility to satisfy their never ending thirst for material satisfaction and comfort, which is again them not getting to grips with their innate drives to nest build for potential offspring.
man here 23 years old and lost not knowing what i want or what im doing. cried watching this
Same here. 20 years old and just blatantly burning time and watching this, I sobbed out of nowhere.
@@jayden1558 participate in the selfauthoring program, it will change your life
@@jayden1558 Well I 'm almost turning 21... I was about to type "same here".
In Jesus Christ you will find true purpose ❤️
About to turn 23 in a week. From 15 to 20 I was living life in the way that would make Jordan proud. But sadly the last 3 years have been living hell (especially 2020) and besides the shitty circumstances a lot of it has been my fault. I went into a severe downward spiral mostly because of my own inability to meet my responsibilites (procrastination and fear of failure) on due time and making stupid mistakes trying to repair the damage, family drama/problems didn't help my situation at all as I almost flunked out of medical school. Got into a semi-shitty relationship in that time frame (which I still don't even know if its worth investing in), I started living as Pinocchio in pleasure island with friends who just dragged me down because most of them are lazy, hedonistic and nihilistic man-children who live lives of self gratification. I was the complete opposite of that but eventually I guess I did turn like them, I started smoking cigarettes and weed, drinking alcohol, stopped working out and bought a gaming pc. Lost all of my athleticism and physique, self respect, sharp witt and analytical skills, mental strength and will power and to top it all off my hair also started thinning rapidly and maybe Ill be bald really soon.
Went through severe depression, dealt with suicidal thoughts everyday in 2018,luckily they seem to have reduced drastically. But I have decided to take action, I switched universities in 2020 (same studies though) and am going to have a semi-fresh start at least. I am re-watching my fav jp vids trying to propell a positive change in my psyche. I still smoke cigarettes sadly ( no weed or alcohol in the last whole year), still procrastinate (a lot less than before though), am still in that relationship (its a bit stable now), my group of friends has semi-disbanded but switching cities will force me to basically be alone. All I'm gonna try is to improve everyday as much as I can, Its high time I stopped feeling sorry for myself and start taking responsibility for my shitty life because nobody is going to fix my problems and give me a nice future.
Female here - I’m glad a lot of men find guidance and look up to Dr. Peterson. I myself also look up to him in the same way. Though I am female, there’s a lot I can relate to and am driven by personal responsibility and finding a purpose. Great as always Dr. :)
Okay, then probably you lack the sense of responsibility, as he says, men come to his lectures because they are less agreeable, hence less responsible.
@@aniruddhasarkar2409 Okay and ?
@@mathiasprudhomme6495 🙄
@@mathiasprudhomme6495 I think his second language must be English. Doesn't seem like a properly structured reply lol
@@cvxcfv Yeah you must be right, but I was actually annoyed by the fact he came to that girl to explain her what he thought she was going through, without obviously knowing her. I unfortunately forgot he and other people didn’t gave a single fuck what I thought
The meaning of life. The funny thing is, a lot of what Jordan says rings true for me, long before I found his videos.
I've been defiant my entire life, without going in to detail, life has sucked from the moment I was born, literally and I've always been angry at being forced to be here and in turn just defied every norm.
I didn't have a path, I was stumbling back and forth and went down some dark alleys.
It wasn't until I met my missus of now 9 years that things began to change. I slowly humbled myself, stopped being angry at everyone. I made a family and I strive to be better and do well for them.
The meaning of life went from nothing to loving, nurturing and raising my family.
I'm happy, I'm driven, and along the road of life I learnt many valuable life lessons that keep me strong.
I can still be defiant but I'm not defiant just because, I do it because I choose too, for certain situations, just like anything else.
Long story short, other people gave me the drive to find meaning in my life and by being apart of society I feel alive.
"Pick something up and carry it...., make it heavy enough so that you can think... yeah well useless as i'm at least I can move that from there to there"
So epic man thought right there
I'm gonna do this
And a few years later, when I'll actually have managed to do something with my life, I'm gonna come back on this video and like every comment
Arkenn34 like every comment? That’s a heavy load, my friend 😅
@@XCHDragox115 well useless, at least we can move it from there to there
If you are “useless” when you don’t lift something, you will still be “useless” even if you lift something.
I am a 24 yr old Egyptian engineer living in Germany currently working as an intern in one of the greatest automotive companies in the world only because of Jordan Peterson words about how to behave like industrious people. This guy saved my life from complete destruction.
It was right after my horrible experience in the middle thesis of my masters that I felt completely lost, weak and insecure. I felt like the dumbest person ever. I worked in a part time job as a cashier just to prove to myself that I can do something worthy and valuable. Sometimes I would feel I am not even an engineer.
One day I had a really long day at work and we had a lot of annoying customers. I was completely down and depressed. It was an isolated industrial area in the forest, and the weather was freezing, and I had to wait at the train station for like 30 minutes. While waiting I looked up to the stars and wondered how I could end up here after years of studying!? At that moment I realized fuck it with any theoretical advises, I want any real practical actions that I find and I will follow starting from now! I opened my cell in the cold weather and carefully listened to a 6 minutes video of Jordan Peterson talking about industriousness behavior. His words completely changed my entire life. Since that day every single morning I set my daily goals, put a schedule and try to execute as much as possible. It is unbelievable how much one can achieve by just reformulating how we precieve tasks we have. There is a big difference between wanting to do something and having to do something. Setting goals means u want to achieve them and by achieving them u reward urself. Just amazing! Also amazing the power of planning on paper!
I really want to thank Jordan Peterson for his guidance. Those are some valuable words, that I believe only Jordan Peterson have wanted to share with the people. He is a kind, strong and wise father, and his daughter should be proud of a father like that. He is my tony stark in the real world!
Nothing you can't find in the Bible LOL
@@Karma-zx8qe Do you want people to follow the advice of the Bible? If so, should you not find it good that people would follow the same advice coming from Dr. Peterson? He has studied the Bible, and it is one of his sources of moral guidance.
give some credit to mum
Do you happen to remember which video it was, about industrious people?
@@mindfreakmember sure! Here it is: ruclips.net/video/eWzhGtZuyEI/видео.html
I love my parents.
But god damn do I wish I had found Jordan Peterson in my formative years.
You found him now. You are in charge of your future - not your parents. That's all that really matters.
This is an absolutely mind-blowing synthesis of what drives a man and extremely accurate towards how I am feeling at this point in my life (,Male, 36, stripped of just about anything I thought summarised me). The eye-opening part of this all to me is that, before viewing this, I actually figured out for myself that my personal motivation to keep on going through tough times, to be able to carry an inhumane load, to be able to go through the wall and back, actually came from the fact that I knew who I did it for and wich fulfilment taking on this role actually got ME in return. I have analysed this after long and endless conversations with my own mind, trying to figure out why I get to feel so miserable when this "status", or "how I am interpreted to those I love" gets taken away from me. However, I have always thought that the result this had on my mental health and thus the worth I value myself with in this life, was an abnormal interpretation of the importance of how my surroundings (including myself) experience my actions. Or at least that this was some kind of symptom that somehow find origin inside this adhd brain of mine.
Mister Peterson, I am fully aware that you will probably never read this, but in the unlikely event that you somehow read this comment, I want to thank you. This may sound trivial, but the mere knowledge that I am NOT the only one to whom this is important, and that this is NOT abnormal makes me feel a fair bit less alien than before.
THANK YOU... This revelation comes I a time it is needed most....
With the utmost respect,
Niels, random 36 year-old from Belgium.
🙏🙏🙏
"useless as i am at least i could move that from there to there"
woah.. that one hits me man
One of the reasons I cry so much when Sam says, "I may not be able to carry your burden, Frodo, but I can carry you!"
“Women know what they have to do. Men have to figure out what they have to do. “ Jordan is right about that.
I'm a woman and I've got no idea what I'm doing
@THAT GUY Not sure if that's really what's going on. He's saying that most men crave that which you describe, and he's right. Men want the responsibility for a family of their own, men want a woman they can take care of. The problem is that a lot of men can't get these things anymore and women are partially to blame for that, because as you said because of feminism women wanted more and more, they don't want a man that still has shit to figure out, they want a man who's already there. Yet, a man can't get there if there's no woman and children to have that responsibility over. It's kind of paradoxal, I guess.
Its been staring us in the face most of our life.
Women are thinking about marriage, the wedding and even how many kids they want....at eight years old in many cases.
Meanwhile, guys in their early 20's still squirm at the very idea of any of those things.
IS HE TALKING ABOUT A CAREER CHOICE?
@@wilhelmdietz4023 Hello.
I keep hearing that Men want to be responsible for others whether through the protective and provision functions as traditional men were or through some other pathway, However if this were true, their responsibility would not need to be enforced.
A man that wants the burden of responsibility for others does not need the threat of the might of the state.
Should a woman's body and a woman's choice be a mans responsibility?
If given the opportunity to abandon 'His responsibility' to others would he?
The problem is not that men need responsibility.....It is that society needs men to be responsible for others.
Mans first and greatest victory is against himself, to be conquered by oneself is of all things most vile and shameful
-Plato
Love this!
Love it too
What do you interpret that as meaning
I take it as what JP is meaning; "take some responsibility for yourself and your life or you'll despise yourself". He says, "Pick up a load and then you can tolerate yourself." And he finishes... "Grow the hell up and do something useful..... Responsibility, man, there's where the meaning in life is."
@@ellcgee thank you! Very insightful thought
The amount of effort and emotion he puts into his talks is what makes these so interesting being that most of the teachers I’ve ever had were never this interesting
Stop for a moment and appreciate how smoothly those chalk curves came out haha
man you can tell it struck me!!!!
Timestamps are helpful 1:35 y'all
you made me genuine giggle LOL. good observation tho, and hey, very true!!
im sure, after years of lecturing, he's got it down
I have a feeling he's drawn distribution curves a couple times before
I wish I had this man as a Father... Hell.. I wish i had a Father. God bless, professor.
Hey guy, not sure if you've sorted it out the whole no-father thing. I am still trying to sort out my own issues with my mother. The greatest difficulty I've faced in this regard is trying to face the emotions deeply tied to that human being. It is remarkably difficult to handle these, so I strongly suggest you find someone that is willing to help you through them. I chose a psychologist personally, but find someone you can trust to work it out.
There's nothing that I find more bothersome than the though "I would've loved to have been raised with a mom", and I imagine you can relate. Contend with these emotions, and resolve them.
cody louis I’ve seen so many comments just like yours. It is so sad but I am so thrilled we found this GEM of a man Jordan Peterson.
Lara O'neal, He’s a Good Example, for Sure!!!😊♥️✌️
cindy moore The best I’ve ever witnessed. My father was there but never emotionally available and out on business trips all the time and never said a damn thing unless it was a criticism.
Lara O'neal, I’m sorry that you went through that. Even as an adult, it would be So Fantastic to have a kind, loving Father.
My father died when I was 2, which caused my Mom to turn to prescription drugs and alcohol. It was not an ideal situation, for Sure.
We can still learn a lot from others, regardless.i hope you have a Beautiful Week. Take good care of you, and try to keep a Positive outlook, no matter what.😊♥️✌️
This hit me hard. I’m having a hard time finding my way.
You will eventually as long as you listen to your heart!:)
snowwhitewitch thanks 🙏
Blind Squid yea your right on that
Will pray for you brother.
RoastedHamLLC fuck this is written and explained so well... I wish I was on pc to copy it or make a screenshot to save. Unfortunately I’m on mobile and have to make like 4 screenshots :p
Dr Peterson, another great lecture! I am 61 almost 62 yrs of age and I’m still learning! Thank you Sir!!! 🎓🙏🏼
This is not limited to men only- I’m thinking about my grandma who recently died… she got a PHD at Harvard, was a professor, devoted to writing and reading, raised four kids, but after retirement she still needed something to do. Up until she was 85 she was grading essays and editing for various authors. When she was no longer in a state to write and was succumbing to dementia, she would constantly ask “when can I write again?” or “what should I be doing?” We would always tell her that she had done enough, succeeded in education and work (especially for a woman back then), raised a great family, and that she could just rest, but that never satisfied her. When she lost being able to write, I think she lost her purpose and gave up the fight to stay alive. No human, man and woman, can live without purpose.
Grandma sounds like a highly conscientious person..
That immensely contributed to her industriousness and urge to achieve something... almost all the time
@NATE. adeath me
@Palhaço Triste ?
My father used to say:
A man dies and goes to heaven, an angel greets him and explain that he can have anything.
He wants a little farm to grow his own food.
Angel says he can give him the food directly.
No no, i want to work for the food.
angel: sorry, you cant work here .
man so wait, is this heaven or hell?
angel: What do you think?
...(end)
This speech reminded me of the famous JFK quote: "Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country." People loved him for saying that, it's sad and inexplicable how this sort of thinking has gone away from our culture in recent years.
Very true. Theres a reason for it though. Politicans, while on their conquest for power and wealth, have decimated the will of the people socially, financially, even through education or lack there of. Slashing funding for the education. Discouraging people from being responsible because (we have a product that can do it for ya! Or a person)...on and on it goes.
Damn! Philippines needs this right now!
We’ve given to our country, and yet it keeps demanding more.
It’s a slippery slope sadly. That idea works when the country has lots of people putting into the system. So you are getting stuff back because everyone is putting in. But the more people drop out and stop putting in, the less there is to reap.
Lets be clear. These days my country of Canada despises what I am (White male)
I will do NOTHING for my country. For my family and people? Hell yeah.
"Your rights are my responsibility"
Man I love that
That's something the government could say.
Do men bear no responsibility when both parties have sex? Women just need to close their legs, but men shouldn't keep it in their pants? When a baby is conceived only women are to be held responsible? Men shouldn't be looked down on when they abandon their children, because women should close their leggs?
@@tearsofjoyforallthispain Uh yes its the woman who need to close there legs because last time i checked most men want to stay with the woman and keep the family together and the WOMAN are the ones wanting the divorce and taking off with the money. so clearly the woman are having kids half hazerdously and not the men. problem solving is not for you i cant believe how ignorant you are and irresponsible
@@GeraltOfRivia99 good god your attitude screams "angry virgin". Your views are so distorted it's unbelievable. I can't even wrap my head around the fact that someone of your stature and opinion could be found lurking in the comments of someone speaking so much wisdom and truth. You obviously have a strong hatred toward women that stems from a place deep within yourself that you need to sort out. You deserve better than to go through life looking for justification for your anger. I wish you well honestly, seems like that's uncommon for you.
@@tearsofjoyforallthispain Agreed. Men and women both bear responsibility for the woman becoming pregnant. In fact, I think men should recognize that they are more vulnerable in the sexual transaction. If a woman accidentally becomes pregnant from a one-night stand, she can decide to keep the child and get child support from the man for 18 years. Conversely, if they're in a relationship and he wants to have a baby, but she doesn't, she can abort the child.
If a woman is murdered while pregnant, it's a double homicide. If she aborts a fetus with a heartbeat because it's inconvenient, she can do so and get applause. Think about the fact that a woman can decide if it's a human life or not, and we all bend to that.
So yes, men should be even more vigilant of who they sleep with. Until men get some kind of reproductive rights such as financial abortions, they should be extremely careful.
in my experience, I've never thought of responsibility as the "meaning of life." To me it seems like most people view responsibility as a burden. Like when someone in their mid twenties says they miss being a teenager because there was no bills to pay, mouths to feed or jobs to wake up for. They just did whatever they wanted, and had fun. But personally, I agree with Jordan because I was without responsibility for a while after I lost my job last year, and I was constantly miserable. I felt like a burden to my family, I felt like a failure. But when I finally started working again, I felt so much happier. I never really thought of it this way until now. Obviously there's way more than responsibility that makes living life worth it, but maybe responsibility can be considered the core.
@Tracchofyre that's a very tiring way too live
Having too much responsiblity can end make you resentful
@Tracchofyre i don't think taking too many responsibilities is a right way to live life
@Tracchofyre my mom had taken care of 2 sets of my grandparents, us and one of her nephew , she had gotten really tired to the point of death
Jordan Peterson is the Uncle Iroh to the many lost Zukos of the world.
Ah, I see you're a man of culture as well.
@@InvertedGigachad Haha. It makes a lot of sense.
That hit close to home for an Avatar fan.
@@officerkd- And also goes to a Tea-Only Diet
Gunshot! Lol.
I wonder what Dr. Peterson would think if he watched all 3 books.
My cabbages! Any custerd in that tart?
"The struggle itself toward the heights
is enough to fill a man's heart." - Albert Camus
This is the video that saved my life a year ago, and I still get chills and tear up when I hear “useless as I am, I can move that from there to there”
Don’t know who you are but I’m happy to see it. A contagious feeling of encouragement, maybe. Hope you’re doing even better now 🎉
I hear you brother. Jordan saved me too. Maintain my bro 🖤
I asked my dying father the meaning of life, he dismissed me nevertheless saying, "go make a family". I never been so confused of my life as to as now.
Hey, have you figured it out? Ik it's been 2 years but still.
@@Belmont1714 he'll never figure it out, none of us will ever figure it out cuz life is like gambling, you'll never know what you'll get so be prepared (im addicted to gambling btw)
@@trenwarYeah you're right the only gamble is not knowing whether it will work out or not. If it does then you'll be satisfied if not then you have to find another reason to live for. And I dare say to you, that I have figured out my life. And I will achieve these goals so help me God.
To have "MUST WATCH" not be clickbait.. this is just great. Thanks for sharing.
Responsibility man, that’s where the meaning in life is.
- Jordan B Peterson.
Bare the burden because you can
It's an opinion
@@Ellis_B You're fucking right it's an opinion. Bearing a burden to prove that you're "better" than everyone else is bullshit--but, that's what a lot of men do.
Have more kids.
Work more hours.
Run up debt.
Work more hours.
Have MORE kids.
Repeat until you can barely stand it!
Yeah, you'll have lots of responsibility. So what?
@@devilsoffspring5519 Its not about being better! Its about not being lost. Plus he said, YOU have a CHOICE. If you choose what you listed out, You are miserable. If you choose the right things, There, That is life.
@@devilsoffspring5519 thats not the point
"People will carry a load if they get to pick the load. Those who dont carry any load become like a sled dog without a sled to pull. You'll end up tearing pieces out of your own leg because youre bored. "
or you just go chase rabbits, more fun with a pack though
Notes from Underground taught me that is a fundamental aspect of human nature to love struggle and suffering, because without it, people would create chaos voluntarily just to alleviate the boredom, i.e. "tearing pieces out of your own leg because you're bored". Read at least the first half of the book, only 40 something pages, and you'll find Dr. Peterson vindicated.
@Sabata Koboekae This is why Peterson specifies that people want / need to carry a load *if they get to choose what it is* - a genuine choice inspired from what is meaningful to that individual, not the artificially limited selection late-stage capitalism provides and which Graeber's bullshit jobs would fall under. Both a lack of a load and an externally imposed load lead to nihilism in the end I think.
@Sabata Koboekae the problem is most of society even didn't choose their choice. how can they live if they're not?
Dr. Peterson is the father I never had and I appreciate his guidance more than just words can express. Here is a brilliant person who gives meaning to life to so many! Thank You Dr. Peterson!
I am 16 years old, from India, and this hit me right in the face! This is something that is missing through out the world!
Damn India too huh?
Same man I’ve been looking for some responsibility
@@williehaller5840 any problem bro 🤔🤔
I don't think in India problem is lack of sense of responsibility. Indian men are already very responsible because our culture is shaped to make them. The problem is lack of opportunity, here people don't have as much opportunities as they have talent
@@puneetmishra4726 Bro fr, as a general guy totally relate
That was the biggest and longest most elaborate way to say : Do you even lift bro ?
Dominique Gagnon 😂😂😂
Thought the same way 😂👍
5:23
Boosting your testosterone makes you mentally stronger.
@tob moe Im not sure it is an empty load man. Lifting weights got me out of depression. The gym gives a sense of accomplishments and good endorphine feels.
All I can say right now is: "wow. He just put in words one of the most complicated social issues in our current era"
My wife when she was really strung out would ask me to pull my foreskin over my nose. Even with the neighbors there. I gotta lot of applause but also nasal congestion.
@@peterhardin9110 How much pot did you smoke when you wrote this comment my guy.
@@peterhardin9110 wtf man..
This actually explains the dilemma I've been in for the past years. It makes so much sense it's stupid!
Don't blame him. Our parents do what they were taught by their parents and the times weren't always great.
I come back to this video every so often and it reminds me that every last word of it is absolutely true and tangible in my life. It's so hard not to give up and it's so easy to forget this realization. I'm so glad someone in his position decided not to give in to the mainstream rhetoric and give a damn about individuals' quality of life
People my age (28) and younger seem to desperately avoid responsibility.
My grandpa, a 90+ year old WWII vet, works every day raising horses because he wants to work.
Nogitsune I don’t think we avoid responsibility. We just simulate responsibility in things like video games and watching tv shows. We weren’t taught to be responsible in house maintenance or work. We got addicted to carrying a false burden.
Old people like to work because they don't want to feel like they are a burden.
Or they get bored otherwise.
Rafcity2001 I really agree with u. Lately, I have been playing video games nonstop and it gives me a fake sense of responsibility pride and a goal to work on, u feel me?
I'd like having responsibilities, at the same time I have an overwhelming anxiety whenever I have to assume something with an administration, mailing etc.
I'm trying to be a man, but something in me is simply terrified by life.
@@Hulgore
You are a man no matter what(except for turning transsexual). Being a man does not mean anything.
Your anxiety maybe means that you are scared of doing something wrong which is a essential trait for responsibility. Men and women have to be aware of consequences.
It's truly tragic that he has become a political target. Really reflective of our society
He chose to take a political stance and people disagree with him. I myself disagree with him but there’s no doubt he has good ideas. I’m just saying you can’t be open about politics and not expect to be scrutinized no matter who you are or what you do.
@@jacknestor7305 they do a lot more than just "disagree with him".
They attempt to shame him, label him, denounce him.
Every interview he does with msm is started with "controversial" or "alt right hero"....
They can't debate him, so its best to try deplatform him. Hence a number of talks in the uk were cancelled as a result of pressure from far left groups.
That's so true. He has said a great deal of financial inequality unstablizes society. Hes said there has to be a political side to look out for the actual disenfranchised at the bottom. As I can see, he's far from a fiscal conservative. I see little evidence of it, from a government interventionist way of looking at it. Socially, Identity politics isn't his thing, as far as I know, except to actually call out SJWs. SJWs aren't a new phenomena, it's 2019, Its not even so damn partisan anymore. He's called men with little personality or sexual appeal, losers, pathetic, etc. Yet, I hear people say hes a defender of the incel mindset, cause "incel" must equal man, which equals conservative, which equals alt-right. Sucks how gender itself has now political connotation. It's like he verbally reprimands the worst personification of what a man can be, time and time again, yet he's mistakenly viewed as being in support of it.
Due to the trans speech activism he meddled with a bit, he's gotten crap from even left-centrists. He's attacked the c-16 bill on a philosophical statue more than the binary political way. I've yet to see him being the tool or monster they make him out to be.
Jack Nestor he even said he tries to speak logically on all things ( he only refused to call a man a she and vise versa so they got triggered ) if the left are offended or triggered then they should truly reevaluate their stance and the base of why they are truly angry .
I am a woman and I am spellbound by all of his talks/interviews. He is so clear with his words that when he debates, the interviewer's filter is exposed. Their own internal dialogue has a huge brick wall around it! He has such a clear lens.
Responsibilty and sacrifice. Two beautiful things.
Sacrifice for a society at where men are treated like a shit,dont play with me.
This is extremely fascinating, he's speaking directly to my circumstances.
Especially around 8 and a half minutes in where Jordan says we live without purpose because we haven't seen the reward of taking responsibility.
i’m crying why am i just now learning this why isn’t this taught in school growing up
Because psychology isn't a field most people would have value to outside of a self help youtube video
Heck, these who teaches didn't even know anything about it.
Because you shouldn't hear this from school. You should hear it from your parents.
Moving responsibility from parents to schools, is just another example of people being cryboys, and giving their whole life to the state (= politicians).
because that's the job of your parents
Because in school you don't realize what this means, you're still in your moms house, given free food, no real work, much free time.. You would hear that but wouldn't appreciate it. Till you get out in life experience fails than you will recognize the beauty of this
Mr Peterson does not get the credit he deserves, he is a magnificent man that everyone needs to listen to.
Might his lessons are against left liberals
Jordan gets a lot of credit. He’s basically taking over the World. He is one of most watched people on RUclips an NYTIMES Best Selling Author and he sells out arena’s in nearly every city he goes to : WORLDWIDE!!! Thats a lot of credit Bro!
Dr.
tomcat1020 i dont know about the rest, but he is DEFINITELY not one of the most viewed on RUclips. By far not.
Au contraire,, he gets far too much credit and way too much attention.
At 59, this resonates strongly. And its never too late to pick up the weight...
@Entrenched Mgtow "you cannot foist responsibility onto Men without the commensurate reward, respect, or authority."
I aint considering refreshing my attitude towards responsibilities for social reward. I am considering it as an option for enhancing my own sense of well being, purpose and gratification.
@Bok ram Is your comment a serious one? Or are you trolling? There are some good points but fluffed out with too much unsubstantiated guff.
a) Why would you suggest that being 'seen' by ANYONE is important at ANY age?
b)If disappearing in other peoples eyes is so important to me, then I have already gone... c) I have had piles since I was 32 d) I started preparing for the 'end' when my mother died, when I was 8 years old. To live without regular reflection on death: that it is coming to us all; is not a life fully lived.
Hope you can respond if you have something useful to add.
I'm just months away from 40 years old and it resonates strongly as well. I wish I knew this stuff when I was a teen.
It's also never too late to become more mature and stop listening to manchild JP. social conservatism is not the answer to your problems but a symptom of them. Too bad at 59 your still such a child.
@@juliand2917 Too bad for who?
Omg.. I had literal chills down my spine and that’s when he says I see men’s eyes light up when I say this …. This is some powerful stuff
There's an amazing movie called "Ink", about demons and how they affect human life (metaphorically, of course). And there's a brilliant line there (i don't remember it word-by-word) - to destroy a man, you make it so that he has nothing to be proud about. A man without pride is done, he's just a wiggling mass. And It's incredible, after all these years since watching that movie, to hear the same thoughts but from completely different perspective of Jordan, where he calls that pride a responsibility.
Yes, it's very interesting. Good observation. As a volunteer motivational speaker and life coaching with prerelease inmates, mostly male, I taylor my presentation to the men to live honorably and to the women to own their worthiness and stop waiting for someone to fix t by sir shit.
Awesome quote. So true.
nice
I heard that too.
Thanks for the share.
When your eyes light up and he says the males in the crowds faces just light up. Lol perfect timing
EXACTLY.
Follow this thought and you will might figure out who got the timings really..you’re close
farouk Althlathini your english is close too m8. Good try.
Looks like he is good at reading crowds as .... # metoo
lolz
Guilty
"Women know what they have to do. Men have to figure out what they have to do. And if they have nothing worth living for, then they stay Peter Pan, and why the hell not. Because the alternative to valued responsibility is impulsive, low-class pleasure. That's another thing that we're doing to men and to boys that's a very bad idea: 'You're pathological and oppressive.' It's like 'Fine then, why the hell am I going to play?' If I get no credit for bearing responsibility, you can be bloody sure I'm not going to bear any. But then your life is meaningless and you're full of self-contempt and nihilism. That's what I think is going on at a deeper level in regards to men needing this direction."
Brilliant.
0vrStart
Yeah, he nailed it here.
"Women know what they have to do."...Have/raise kids. That's basically part of the point he is making here. That being said, I wonder how many of the women who see his lectures in person either do not want children or are unable to have children of their own.
adopt a child? just sayin
@HAVE A LAUGH That's true but I don't see the need for him to not negate Women's struggle. Everyone is always talking about how Women struggle and etc. No one ever talks about what's wrong with Men, Jordan does though.
@HAVE A LAUGH Yeah you are right. I don't see it happening though as people are always divided and always have different opinions. Just human nature to do so.
"For men there is nothing but responsibilty."
~ Jordan Peterson
8:36 "If i get no credit for bearing responsibility it could bloody well be sure I'm not going to bear it" Very relatable, life is useless
Neddier -ok Peter. Stay magical.
I see in the fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables, slaves with white collars, advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of the history man, no purpose or place, we have no Great war, no Great depression, our great war is a spiritual war, our great depression is our lives, we've been all raised by television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars, but we won't and we're slowly learning that fact. and we're very very pissed off.
The Kids Aren't Alright - The Offspring
where is my mind- the pixies
Nihilistic destruction such as in Fight Club is Pleasure Island
@@ronniesimmonds702 It's so much deeper and more complex than that.
@@coop-us7tp Branding capitalism the demon rather than men taking responsibility for their own emotions and instead unleashing bitterness on the consumerist world around them, spreading fear and pointless existential angst, destroying rather than inspiring. It's a great story but the ideology is juvenile
This speaks to my soul. It seems ridiculous to say watching a stranger talk about how to get some meaning out of your life can actually change your whole mentality. I'm finally pursuing what I want to do for the first time in my life. Anyone watching this video who is feeling how I was I wish you the best fucking luck in the world in finding your meaning.
Just an update - I now have a full time position as a science teacher. I'm not saying without jordan peterson I wouldn't be where I am today. But the years building upto my first comment I was so lost, addiction issues from childhood trauma. I made it my responsibility to change after watching jordan for a while. Once again, the best of fucking luck finding your meaning wether it be family or career.
I feel.you tnx
how's it going?? any success? hope u doing good man
Still early days but I'm on the path, hope you're good too!
I guess I’m in the 10% who needs this information as a woman! This has helped my life so much. Thank you for doing what you do!!