I'm one of this girls you mentioned: educated, I speak three languages, graduated in international relations, I cook, I clean, but unfortunately lived in a economic struggling country... my boyfriend found me on Instagram, he was telling me how tired he was with the crazy feminist girls in his country and after some time come to visit me, got me a ticket to visit him and during the time I was with him, I always woke up 30 minutes before him to make him breakfast before his work... he was mind blowed and I was like "what? This is the least I can do for everything he is doing to me". Bought me winter clothes, new make up and is going to help me do my masters in his country. Never crossed my mind dening sex to him because he is so sweet and supportive, sex is what makes us understand each other beyond the language barrier. Great advice!!! I will always watch your channel to make sure I'm as good wife as I can be to him!!
What i hear in this is something that western women have LOOONNGGG forgotten.. Gratitude. Being grateful for something someone else does for them. I can guarantee that he's grateful to you for what you're doing for him. THAT is how you build a team in a marriage.
When a wife withholds sexual intimacy, her husband will continue to desire sex, but at some point, he will no longer desire his wife. He is better off without her.
You get more of what you reward and less of what you punish. When a wife punishes her husband by withholding sex and physical intimacy, she will get less of his interest, desire, support, time, love, attention. She has so much power that she, all too often, missuses by following the bad advice of her envious and hateful female so-called "friends"
Leaving after 34 years, 17 being sexless. I may be gray, but I make it look good. She has her fat ass on the couch eating chocolate and watching Netflix saying I’m so tired, not tonight. That was 17 years ago 😂😂😂
That is 100% true. For 8 months my wife has been denying me sex. About 5 weeks ago I somehow stopped desiring her and have completely lost interest in sex with her. It wasn't a choice I made, it just happened and I didn't realize it for a couple weeks. Not sure what that means for the marriage, but I guess that will work itself out in time.
15 years I've been in a sexless marriage. I'm tearing up listening to this. I'm 30 days from executing my 5 year exit strategy and filing for divorce. NEVER again will I give a women such power over me through monogamy and marriage! The ladies will be loosing another good man going his own way.
Hire a PI… she is getting it somewhere else and you just cant figure it out… a private investigator will get her quick… hire a female one since they are expert level w cheating…
The first thing a Man should do is Hire a P.I. when there's a 1st long period of Intimacy and Distance when there's no Childbirth or other Medical complications involved. When she's there with you but still isn't Initiating anything. You will atleast find out Someone has her emotionally and Ready to Betray you . 90% of the time atleast.
You are another vile misogynist. You refused to do anything to make her feel safe, or to make sex worth it for her. None of you have the balls to respect women .
My wife denied sex, for the most part, to me for the last 15 years we were married. But she used sex to get other men interested in her as soon as she left me. A story old as time.
Yup. I've come to that conclusion as well, after living through the same thing with a number of women over the years. Unless you be one of those chad/jerome types that all women swoon to spread for, sex with you is just a tool and a weapon to suck you in then control you in a relationship, strictly for their benefit.
@@dave3987 75%? Lucky. I wish that was the case. My wife just taps TikTok all day on the couch, 0 work. It took me years of fighting to get her to cook. We went from 100% home ordered meals to around 50%. Oh, she also does laundry. Nothing else though. 99% of women born after the 80s are garbage.
My 1st marriage was marred with weaponized sexual frequency. We discussed and agreed over it for YEARS before I stepped out. I stayed in this sexless marriage for 23 years until our youngest was 20. That's when she got a boyfriend. I filed for divorce and she decided to go to war. She created a lie of abuse and attempted murder. I was taken in a questioned by police. She told our adult children to try and separate us. And she filed THIRTY NINE motions in court trying to take my retirement. Fortunately it didn't work. I was granted my divorce and was allowed ro keep my retirement. After 3 years of therapy and rebuilding myself, I finally found someone who adores me.
Your story really gets me to think that maybe if you are filing for divorce to set up some video cameras in the home a few weeks before she knows you are filing, just to show some day to day life and how she isn't scared. Sometimes the boring would really be telling of the situation.
I have heard other stories like yours. I have always told guys to get and keep receipts. It is the only thing that will some what save your ass once she starts lying and society belives her.
There are millions of married men who haven't had sex in DECADES. You ladies talk about 3 days, or a month. Thank you for the work you are doing. You could save the country.
I just ran across this, and you are 100% correct. There was a study I read about 2006/2007 about prostate cancer. It was over 80% of the men had been in a sexless marriage for years. The study consisted over 3000 men. My marriage consisted of occasional sex the first 3 years. Then in went to maybe once a month then to zero for the last 6 years.
1. Melanie's hair is looking FANTASTIC today 2. 90% of us regular guys just wanna be able to be intimate with ONE WOMAN for the rest of our lives....maybe 95% of us guys. 3. Don't give us a reason to look elsewhere. Because we will.
I am Christian. I have come to learn that sex is so important that even the bible puts great emphasis on not denying your spouse sex. According to the bible even the fact that you want to spend time with the Lord should never be a reason to deny your spouse sex, unless, of course, he/she allows you. If prayer cannot be a bar to sex then what excuse can there be to deny sex to your other half
MORE. Women want more. They think it will motivate a man to give them more. Then they will ask for intangibles. Give me more Time, but go work, earn more, save and build up to make us rich but buy me money wasteful things constantly.
Have a brother-in-law who had a dog that would only take food from him. No one else. Not even my sister. Brought that dog everywhere, wouldn't go an any vacation/trip where he couldn't bring the dog. I once asked him about it, wouldn't the dog just finally eat if it got hungry enough, couldn't he board it somewhere for a day or two-- again, the dog would probably eat? His response, "When you train a dog to only get fed by you, you F'g make sure it gets fed.!!"
According to my Wife, I just need to forget about it and go without it for the REST OF MY LIFE. "It's no big deal!" Won't kiss, won't embrace, refuses to engage in anything that would lead to close physical intimacy. Just decided, it's over - but I have to be faithful, and fulfill my duties without fail.
Respectfully - why are you still there? What is your why? Cause if assume it has to be something outside of yourself.... Hate to hear you're going through this man.
Facts! I have more than a few seeking a relationship from me and I don’t see any value in giving up my freedom just to be with them. No ROI just debt!!
Wife: you're my man, so I don't want you eating at anyone else's house. Husband: ok, honey. Wife: and I don't want you ordering takeout either; it's my responsibility to feed you. Husband: that's fine, honey. Wife: and stay out of my kitchen; if you want something to eat, I'll cook it for you. Husband: that's great, honey. Husband: I'm hungry, what's for dinner? Wife: I don't feel like cooking today... this week...this month... this year. Warning: when a man goes into true starvation, there comes a point where they don't even want to eat anymore. Soon after, they die.
I never deny my husband. His love language is touch, and though I could likely go weeks without touching anyone lol, he cannot. I make the effort to hug and kiss him throughout the day. It makes him happy which makes me happy. We can't wait to be empty nesters. 😘
When she thinks she has you, and also believes you cannot get it somewhere else, you can best believe she is going to start pretending to be "Too Tired"...
God bless you, when she knows you have no options she's going to punish you with sex, but if you got options she's gonna be on her ten toes to keep you and to give you everything you want.
Maybe a second wife could fix this issue? "Ok fine then me and nancy will knock boots, you can watch. Oh, thats not fair? Nancy thinks its a great idea....whats that?.....no i love you both equally but you keep denying me....what? Youd like to join in? Thats what i thought go get the chocolate syrup and my Indiana Jones hat! Its time to explore the forbidden tombs!" (Insert Indiana Jones ost here)
As a woman, I just don’t understand where these other women are coming from. I desire and love my husband so much, even little things about him are so alluring to me. I have never turned him down, because I not only love him, but always desire to please him and show my devotion to him. Women: You should wake up every day and think “How can I be a better wife that is worthy of my husband?”
Emily, well my hats off to you. Your husband is a good man AND A LUCKY MAN. This exact thing happened to me within 18 months from the starting blocks…….….and I toughed it out and went on to have a rocking small biz for 15 years, but after almost 20 years I get this unexplained 4 year TOTAL deprivation period, which nearly literally killed me. The little hole clean thru the hallway is still there… yes I decided to leave and it’s still there as I refuse to fix it as a reminder of what was done to me WITH ZERO REASON GIVEN. Yes I became physically ill a few years earlier had to sell my business and stopped making 150-200k plus a year and ironic as hell, the treatment I received changed shortly thereafter for some strange damn reason, yet I can’t figure out WHY?! Now I wasn’t a wheelchair bound veggie by a long shot either. Just too variable to be able to work that 65-80 hour small biz any more….. ohm h I forgot, she got that social media addiction that then polluted her mind with a dose of feminism. Not rabid, but enough that I could tell. And after 27 years, 8 years of it hell for me, I can’t say I see any other path…..until that path is presented and then it’s trail time for sure……. Feel like the biggest sucker, defrauded from day one with this AND plenty of other crap too…….. yes, DEFRAUDED. Yet I must say, I was the sucker that bought that ticket to shitzville , so yes I accept the responsibility of making that absolute shit decision. Young men out there, unless you are willing to bet your life x100 on it, don’t do it. Just DONT. Cause it’s more than likely gonna shred you……:(((
That makes you a unicorn. You might think "Ah, no, I'm sure X% of people have a fine relationship.", but nuh-uh, those are just fake facebook relationships and lies. Although, I'm pretty sure your husband still wants to do it more frequently than you. Male libido, especially a healthy one is a force of nature that dwarfs female libido.
Because you got married to your husband because you love him. It seems that a lot of women get married to have the wedding not because they love their husband
I quit trying to initiate sex with my wife years ago because I can’t take the constant rejection. It got bad enough that I now don’t want to sleep in the same bed with her anymore. Just being right there is too painful to take
A man still needs sex and his body will still pressure him. Live more! You deserve more and you must never give up on having a good marriage. Divorce. God allows it and he wants you to find a good woman.
No person is entiteled to forbid sex for another person for their entire life. If a wife decided to ban sex this is what she has done - she forbids the husband of having sex outside the marriege while prohibiting it within the marriage. This is a sadistic abuse. Such a woman must inform her husband of her choice and free him of any obligation to her - she ended the marriage.
I decided to refuse them after they weaponized sex. It ended both marriages. Them threaten ing to be outside the marriage made me say go ahead. It's the next guys mistake with you and not me.
As a man, I agree that we can tell when our wives arrive at the point where they grant us obligation sex whether that is once a week, twice a month, or twice a year.. We long for the connection/intimacy we once had and eventually fantasize about improving our situation while knowing/feeling that we should keep the family together for the sake of the children. I'll do the 20 year prison term (I've already done 18) and then hope for life on the other end of that time. I'm a traditional guy, but have to say that I couldn't recommend marriage to any man.
Great pitch for Marriage! This dies out with the older generation. Marriage is not worth it today. Dead bed, paternity fraud, 50% loss... What's the benefit??
The line that went something to the effect that men don't share their everyday struggles with their wife or partner is so true. Women have no idea how hard men work and it is not just that the work is hard. If it was just that work was hard, men would have no problem with it. It is all the other BS that we have to deal with to get through a week of work knowing that we have to keep our mouth shut on injustices that we get while working knowing that no one cares if we complain.
I've said this many times in my circle of friends and family. There is a saying "happy wife, happy life". I will expand on that for women "a peaceful man will do all he can"!
When I was Married. It was used as a obedience tool. After awhile I said if you keep it up, I will find a replacement. She laughed and kept doing it. I found a replacement and never bother her with it. After awhile she was curious and asked why. I said I found a replacement and told to find someone else who will play the game. Life in the Matrix.
It's honestly never too early or too late. I just started a relationship and Melanie's channel has really helped me understand what I need to do as a girlfriend and maybe even a wife someday. I have a great man and I don't wanna lose him. I'm tellin' you girl, once you get that good man, you'll thank her.
It is written " Let the husband render to his wife the affection due to her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. Because the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body but the wife does. And do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self control."
@@andrewgardner1727 nah bf and gf are different, husband and wife are from God amd should be treating each other like one flesh, and we wouldn't abuse our own flesh
@@andrewgardner1727 I also agree but I'm just a stupid human so I've given up sex until I'm married, but looking at the way the world is now that's a long while away
@@thebigree6155 not stupid just was properly raised and know the meaning to love and intimacy and truthfully most woman don’t deserve it now a days make all that effort for what to get cheated on or discarded or divorced no thanks to the streets they belong and will hit the wall and when they do don’t contact me
This is still the “VIDEO OF THE YEAR” Sis. You Ladies brought the house down! Much love, keep it coming… I want to send it to my wife but feel that it will be a “waste of time”😢
idk man. Do you really believe that? I think for that, the other party has to be somewhat recipient of the information presented. I doubt that could've been happening. If it could've, than the situation couldn't have got escalated to the breaking point.
If I ever get married for a second time (that's a real big IF) I will be making it VERY clear that if she decides at some point that she no longer wants to fulfill my needs in the bedroom, that I will go get those needs fulfilled elsewhere. My first wife, when she was my gf, was wild and insatiable in bed for literal YEARS until we got married, then the excuses started and the frequency dropped off a cliff - I will not be put in that position again. Just because you got a ring doesn't mean you can just stop trying.
Been through the same thing. After our son was born we did it 2-4 times a year. I actually had the wisdom of discussing this topic with her at the start of the relationship like you described. It made no change. I discussed the topic with her every few months: what's the matter, why there is no sex, why she doesn't have a sex drive, how can we improve. That talk usually results to one very bad sexual act, but zero improvement for the future. I begin to think that for the vast majority of women you can not win this war, and you need to be keeping office wives, banging other women, or just not settle and change relationships every few years.
Something my father told me when I met my now "wife" of 22 years is that the title of wife does not replace boyfriend. It's an additional title. The same goes for girlfriend to wife.
I remember in my early 20s I lived with a woman. We were together for 4 years but about 18 months in she decided that we weren't going to have Intimacy anymore. I'd try to initiate and she'd reject me. I was very confused because up to that point she was very receptive. It came to a head one night when she said, 'I don't see why we can't just not have sex anymore'. She had basically decided that we weren't having sex again, but she had up to then neglected to tell me. I was quite young so I thought maybe this is how relationships worked. I figured, leave it be and maybe the Intimacy will come back. It did a year later but only after another woman in our group started showing interest in me. Nothing happened between us, but my partner turned the Intimacy back on to keep me from leaving, I guess. Then 6 months later it was gone again. What ended the relationship? She cheated on me. Can you fking believe it? She cheated. That one relationship kinda fked up my relationships for life after that. It took about 20 years before I could trust a woman again. And even with my now wife, I'm so reticent to initiate Intimacy through fear of rejection because of that first relationship experience. Despite my wife being up for it all the time. I still feel as though I'm doing something bad or wrong when ever I initiate Intimacy with my wife.
Nah - she was cheating on you when the sex dried up first time, she just didn't get caught and couldn't convince the other guy to let her move in. That other woman probably knew she was cheating on you, so to keep her secret and meal ticket in tack - she turned it back up. Think the worse and it's probably true with women - take it from a former single dad of 2 teen girls.
can empathise with you. SImilar thing happened with me in my mid 20s. She was "Demi Moore" in Disclosure at the beginning and went on to become a nagging, no intimacy no initiation and just vanilla ok i'll do it woman towards the end of the relationship. And then she cheated on me. I, who had built her up emotionally after she had had a terrible relationship was cheated on and made to feel like I was worse than her previous bf who had even threatened to make her nude pictures public online. Mind you, this was in the late 2000s when spicy pics were a taboo unlike how common it has become. I gave it my all in that relationship but was made to feel worse than a blackmailing pervert. Never could I give it my all in the next few relationships and none of them worked. As of now, I am 40 and single and truly happy. I know no matter how loving and traditional some women can be, a marriage/relationship will become like living with roommates. I get some action once in a while but it's no longer priority. I just love riding my motorcycles, travelling. MGTOW
I've never heard any woman say the things that was being said in this video. It's the honest truth, and women seem to want to deny that this is what they are doing to the man in their lives. Abuse hadn't even crossed my mind this way. My ex-wife had given me a sex-less marriage, and didn't seem to want to give me any for one reason or another. So I turned to porn and took it upon myself to take care of my natural needs that way. Not long before our divorce i decided to talk to her about it. She told me, "let's go into the bedroom and you can have your way with me". There was apparently a lot of resentment that she had been holding on to, and not once did she talk to me about what was bothering her, so I was able to fix it. That was the last time I had any kind of intimacy with her. We divorced and I said goodbye and went my own way. It's a sad thing when a woman that calls herself your wife and doesn't......refuses.....please her husband in ways that was meant to be, and not just for the man, but for herself as well. I'm not interested in getting married ever again. If there's a woman in this world that doesn't manipulate her man, communicates with her man, loves her man in all ways and simply treats her man like he's her one and only, respects him, supports him, gives him at least a few hugs and kisses in the morning before going to work and when he comes home from work and encourages him when he needs it, then please let me know who you are. I can reciprocate the same way for you as you would for me. Who knows, maybe you can convince me in changing my mind about marriage. Women are so ignorant and selfish these days.
We do exist! My heart breaks at these stories and I want to assure men all over that not all women are the selfish, manipulative kind of person they've known. I thank God that I was raised by Christian, homeschooling parents who taught me to keep myself pure and be a loving, selfless, joyful woman. I am excited to be a wife if it's God's will, and I have already made the decision to rebel against this mold of abusive wives. I'm going to be eager, vocal in my adoration and desire, and sex-positive. Praise to the Lord that I have a healthy view of sexuality as a gift from God. It's not dirty, or boring, or bad.
@@annahenderson2155 you are a very rare person (unicorn, as they say these days). I appreciate those that can live with thier beliefs and swim against the tides of society. Blessed be you, with all your goals in life on a daily basis 🙏
@@kirkmilliren9218 Thank you very much. That is kind. I want to speak hope to people who have endured rough things in life. And I want to give men in particular the assurance that there are good women out there who reject today's self-centered view of sex and marriage. Ultimately, I think it goes back to the very root of love, which is a selfless decision to put someone else first. Love is not a feeling you fall into. That's not to say that feelings and attraction and desire don't play into it; they do. But true love is a daily, sacrificial choice. How glorious marriages would be if both spouses were doing that! Of course the basis for that love is only found in Jesus. I think and live this way because I have been given that undeserved love from Him, so I want to give it to others. I pray you find healing and a new, refreshed path in life.
Lolno, when they have genuine desire for you they'll make YOU tired if sex because of how much they want. It's almost never the case though because they use it to trap a high value guy, so it won't apply for most people and often stop after marriage even with top men.
She described it perfectly! Throw out all the books and wasted money on therapist. She said that "He needs sex from You to feel VALUABLE!" Men fight battles of all different kinds , and alot of times, comes Home Wounded and beat from those battles. In my opinion, there is nothing more important that You can do (because You have the ability to do it) than to make Him feel VALUABLE, so that He is ready to go back out and keep fighting. Because He is fighting for You and Your Family!
Withholding sex in marriage is grounds for marriage annulment. Not divorce but annulment. Annulment cancels the marriage and there is no division of property just restitution to the position before marriage.
@@lawshorizon the word I used was annulment not divorce. One of the pillars for annulment is one of the parties being unable to fulfil their sexual ligations in marriage and that is grounds for annulment. The Roman Catholic church allows annulment of marriage on such grounds and the secular court has to follow the situation and grant a divorce in parallel. Annulment means the marriage never happened or if it did it no longer exists which is not the case with divorce. If my wife would refuse to have sex with me then I would seek an annulment and get it quicker than a divorce without the financial baggage that a divorce entails. It is an argument that secular courts cannot refute since marriage in the Roman Catholicism church is a sa
It does not matter what people think about this. The state in which you live will tell you whether they consider you to be married. Some states in the USA do not require you to sign papers to be considered married in the eyes of the state. Mine is one of them. Check your state laws!
Trust me fellas just because she is withholding sex does NOT mean you as a man did something wrong. Most of the times is cuz she's giving it to someone else. And of course when that is the case it is NATURAL for her to gaslight YOU!
@@anthonybaker5199too many men assume responsibility whenever their woman is upset at them instead of realizing she is cold enough to gaslight after doing wrong
You are completely and absolutely wrong, most of the time a woman withholds sex is because the man is neglecting her emotionally and isn’t helping her do any household chores!! And gaslighting is NOT something that all women do! You saying that is what’s actually gaslighting.
Not just sex being withheld, but respect for him as a man and what he does for the family the two of you have. Respect for him also is a part of this sex deal, you show him the respect he needs as a man by doing so. You take those two things away from him, and you will most definitely lose him eventually. I know, I had a marriage like that.
Women don't have the ability to admit they are the problem. It's easier to find a five leaf clover than to find a woman who will hear this and get anything out of it.
I’m a woman watching this video and I found it to be helpful and educational. It honestly explains what a man needs far better than the men do themselves.
I was in a sexless marriage for 15 years. Was told if I did A,B,C she would be in the mood. When I did A,B,C she would come up with X,Y,Z. There was ALWAYS a reason. Until one day she admitted that she did not want to have sex, ever. She just had no sex drive and wouldn’t do anything to address the problem. It wasn’t long after that I found a woman who wanted me and understood the importance of sex. We have now been together for 12 years. Still have a regular sex life. Happiest I have ever been. Women, if you don’t give your man what he needs, someone else will. My ex has had 4 boyfriends that I know of. Still single.
As a happily married woman (32 years), you are spot on! I remember talking with friends 20 years ago, when all of our children were very young. Of course raising small children was tiring at times! I told this one mom that I asked my husband to pick an evening chore he didn’t mind doing…that I could count on his doing. Washing dinner dishes? Bathing the children? Putting the children to bed with books? (It could change, but it needed to be a night time chores.) I explained to my husband that if I was not exhausted after the children went to bed, I would have more energy to be HIS plaything before bedtime. He was all in! It worked VERY well for us! My friend was really irritated with me and said, “Well, my husband would do chores if I BRIBED him with sex, too!” I replied, “So, that’s a bad thing?? Win-Win!” I would only disagree with one point. After menopause, there have been many times that my body just could not reach orgasm as easily as previous years, and I lovingly told my husband, “Please take this in the spirit of love. I am willing to ‘take one for the team’, so to speak.” I was/am happy to pleasure him fully knowing my body would not orgasm. All I asked was that it not be as long of a love making session. It would start really hurting after too long. Sometimes he would respond with, “I’d rather wait for you to join in the fun,” but sometimes he said, “Yes, please.” Y’all may call that “lazy sex” or “starfish sex,” but if my body just could not orgasm, what other option is there? Besides, he has said sometimes he really enjoys those times because it can be ALL ABOUT HIM!❤
The key is you both communicated and had a conversation. You compromised but not without telling your truth and it was still in a way that honored you both. Health concerns are a valid reason sex may change, but even then, there are ways to work through it. What you did is exactly what you are supposed to do in any issue in a relationship but even more so with sex and intimacy, as that is physically bonding you two together. Thanks for sharing your story.🙂
@@jacobclayton2954 Thanks. I have been surprised over the years at how many couples are afraid to talk about sex. “It’s too personal…” 😳 HAVING sex is personal!!! Talking about it is exponentially less personal!! I do recommend having sex talks when you are not revved up! There needs to be no emotion or sexual tension during these talks. Men can get angry, due to testosterone I am guessing, and women can shut down. Both are horrible for any discussion, but can jade future discussions. (Especially for women as we have elephant memories when it come to that kind of thing.🤣)
Sex is usually 99% physical when you're young. Get in your forties and fifties, it should become more connection. Sadly, wives by then wonder why their husbands begin to show more interests in hobbies than being with them. Their "tank" is empty.
It's not really the lack of sex, if she were a paraplegic or something, it would be fine. With every kid (6) we had, there was a 6 week gap of no sex, never hurt my ego one bit. It is the constant rejection and feeling that she is annoyed at your presence. Imagine if every time she came near you, you told her that she smells bad and looks ugly and you don't want to touch her. Or every time she opened her mouth, you just reply with, "That was a stupid comment". That is essentially what they are doing.
It’s not a need it’s a want. You need to harness your sexual desires into other things. The Bible says let a man marry if he cannot suppress his desire for sex otherwise it is best to stay a bachelor
Laura, that is idiotic. A man with no self control would force himself on her. A wife denying sex is manipulative and breaking the wedding vows. She is tearing apart the family.
My ex-wife did that, among other things. She was borderline like Amber Heard. She has cats and decades of unhappiness, I got a new wife and we've been married for DECADES.
.. on my 54 y o i also hold women's accountability when they talk with caucious about things that keeps them busy, and do this without velvet gloves ..🤫🤭🙄
Unless the current corrupt divorce laws change then this is only going to get worse. There is now 0 benefits for men to marry and plenty of risks. Living in a sexless marriage is pure hell and I will never go through that again.
..sexuality among common people is also always related to 'power' and eventually any kind of corruption.. it's seems to be inherent and leads to weaponized it.. when these kind of things would'nt happen, there's also less perverted or violent situations my guess.. 'power' , status, m o n e y and h o n e y should be in the right amount and balance..Globally that is..😊🤫😉
How many married guys are lonely, frustrated and depressed because their spouses "aint feeling it"?? Plenty. And women wonder why men dont feel close to them. Because we dont feel loved or appreciated. And when the guy finds another woman to share affection with, they cry about being abandoned, cheated on and whatever.
I hear you loud and clear... Just reading this resonates loudly to what I'm dealing with... I love my wife but I'm so torn and just very depressed, crying....
Right most women think denying sex is ok but cheating is bad. Denying sex to a partner for long periods is no better than cheating. I've told this to women and explained how sexual neglect is abuse. Of course they never understand and disagree.
Hello Melanie! Thank you for your honesty, we men need more women like you exposing the truth about the way women are behaving, I’m a married man, my wife filed for divorce because she doesn’t love me anymore, she says she’s given me everything, I was busy busting my ass working hard to provide for my family and never saw that coming.
If you are not married yet and this is happening get out now, before you start counting how long its been in months. Its better to be alone than be alone lying beside someone.
100% Listen young brothers. It's damned hard to lay next to the one woman you promised to love forever when she has no interest in being intimate. I'm in too deep to leave right now but learn a lesson from someone who has lived it.
I can’t believe that there is someone , not just someone , but 2 women on this podcast talking about everything I’m going through. I’ve held on 14 years in this marriage and 27 in my first marriage. I’m 60 and it never gets fixed 😢
I think with the body counts of Western American women today it is extremely hard for them to pair bond to just one man after experiencing so many different men in their lives. Sex to them just becomes a chore in exchange for resources from a man!
I think this point is not mentioned enough. Notice how a lot of guys in these comments say they've been married for 15+ years. That means they got married in the early 2000s. Feminism was in full swing and women were hooking up with multiple guys before marriage even before social media. These women destroyed their ability to pair bond by having multiple sex partners before marriage and their husbands paid the price.
@@RsZ789 I don't think this is true. Some women's sex drive just dries up from being mothers and becoming busy. Though with women now also working jobs its probably worse. With how common this stuff is they can't all be cheaters.
Dealt with it for 20+ years of that type of abuse. Went a full year without because she was mad. I didn't drift off I stayed in it. Well, now in the divorce process. Was tired of the weaponized use of it. Plus I was never "good" enough in that department. Wanted therapy for us. She said no. I said separate, she called the cops and had me removed. No legal means of fighting it due to the divorce laws. Now trying to build back.
@@beezytalkingshit9319 It's the way they can manipulate the Protective order system without repercussions on false allegations. Because in these type of situations you are guilty until proven innocent.
@@Smokey_TwoGunz And they say they want EQUALITY!! smh! These bihs can't spell the word! We got it bad when it comes to being believed about something. If a woman say it happened, everyone automatically believes her. Look at the Johnny Depp situation! I don't believe anything a woman says unless she has proof.
I don't even know where to begin after that wisdom !!!! Any man that gets one of these ladies, IS A BLESSED BLESSED MAN !! Talking with a buddy and his wife, not on sexual part, but even just being sweet or women giving a man ONE compliment !! I told her, that other than my mom, sister, or a close family friend, I have not had a woman give me even a simple compliment in 15 plus years !! You are a hard worker .... you're a nice looking guy ... you seem like a good man ..... Women would have men lining up for them if they ever got back to that just once a week !!!
If a woman is withholding sex from there man he will stray because he is hurt. Number one reason women withhold sex from their husband because they're cheating on them
No, the number one reason is the man not helping in doing any household chores, and neglecting the woman emotionally!! Haven’t you read the articles about this? Housework is EXHAUSTING, and every woman needs her husband’s help to do at least some chores. You have no idea what you are talking about.
@@FazeParticles rights aren’t privileges, they are bare minimum requirements and necessities!! Do you seriously think that it’s a “privilege” for women to finally be regarded as people now as opposed to property??!
Marriage was for legitimate progeny and transfer of resources. In many cases a man could also have concubines to fulfill his sexual needs. If we could go back to that philosophy, many of these problems go away.
Love you Melanie. I went through a marriage similar to what you are speaking about and it was difficult to recover from because it made me feel worthless and undesirable by women. It’s a tough situation to go through because you as a man start to blame yourself and it’s tough to share with anyone because as a man you are taught to suck it up and deal with it. Thanks for your understanding about these types of situations that men go through.
This resonates so much Melanie, I can't believe there's support out there. I was in EXACTLY this situation, and after several years in a sexual no man's land, succumbed to interest from elsewhere. I'm not proud of myself, but my wife takes absolutely no accountability whatsoever, it's all my fault!! I didn't sign up for a sexless marriage...there's nothing wrong with her physically, she just couldn't be bothered anymore, so wasn't going to do it just to please me she said. She changed the goalposts as far as I'm concerned, but I'm the villain as I knew I would be.
I dont know why some women think that its a good idea to withhold intimacy from their husbands. As if he couldnt find it from someone else. Which is basically what she's doing, pushing him away into the arms of another woman. But then will be mad when she gets cheated on.
I’ve been married twice, busted my ass at work 40+ hours a week at blue-collar jobs to economically provide for my family, and yet, with all the money, respect, and romantic things that I did for my spouse, I was always snubbed by both spouses after the wedding day. My spouses stopped performing and meeting my needs, started b****ing and nagging everyday about everything, and blaming me for all of their problems (before and after we met), so I stopped sharing my money, my cars, my bed, my cooking (and I’m damn fine cook), and I stopped sharing everything else. Love, romance, connection, and a long-term relationship takes work, effort, time, investment, education, and a responsibility to fulfill one’s duties in a relationship. I wanted a spouse, but I ended marrying (2 marriages) children in grown up bodies. Thank you for making this video. I hope many single and married men and women take this to heart.
Anniversary, 2 birthdays, new years, valentines day - 5 times a year times 11 years equals 55. I am sure beginning/end of marriage has some stacks, or my dates I chose were the wrong ones, but confident it was generally treated like a chore - like cleaning gutters once a year.
Melanie, awesome commentary about a real and painful subject for married men and women. I know men who have given up, not having been intimate in years with their spouse. For men it is abuse. Men who choose a wife become, spiritually, emotionally and physically connected to their wife. Many times men will suffer in silence and not violate their oath/vows because of their code of conduct. So some men disconnect and only speak and treat their wife, not as their "bone of their bone and flesh of their flesh" but only as a roommate with a title. Thank you for educating men and women.
Hi, Melanie. This is a really great video on the man-woman relationship. 'Friends zone' does not work for men between a man and woman who are married or in any girlfriend-boyfriend relationship. There are technical, spiritual reasons why. In certain magical teachings it is shared that some of the energetic differences between the sexes are the reasons WHY we are attracted to each other, and how we we each individually get satisfied and want to stay together. In the man the head area is magnetical (in a higher spiritual sense, not ordinary magnetism). In the woman her head is electrical (in a higher energetic sense). She is pulled to him by his mind, his thoughts and dreams, his poise and mental power. In the woman her genitals are magnetical (in a higher energetic sense); his are electrical. So she pulls him by her sexuality. Whenever we each give the other opposite sex partner what he or she needs, all is well; there is balance. Melanie, just as you wisely echoed the lady in your video, and you are a wise lady, women cannot expect a man to stay happy if she withholds sex, any more than a wise man can expect his woman to be happy if he stops being her family leader, inspirer, provider. Nature has rules. When we cooperate with those we can be happy.
I've had sex last week. Before that, October or November :) Before that, some time early summer - I remember because we had a big fight about me talking about me bringing up not having enough intimacy, and she stormed out of the house and started shouting in the backyard so neighbors hear her in order to humiliate me: "I ONLY HAD FOUR ORGASMS EVER SINCE MOVING TO THIS HOUSE!". Don't get married, guys!
This hits on so many levels for me and my ex. I know that after a while women stop listening, but just because you women (some, not all) stop listening doesn't mean that we are not telling you the truth. For me, being intimate with my ex was to reconnect and help give me purpose. One of the major reasons why suicide rates are disturbingly high in our male community is because we are made to feel like we don't have a purpose and for the ones who do speak on it, we are ignored. As a man, I can say for certain that I don't condone or like stepping out, but this is a need for us as men and women are weaponizing it against us for their reasons. This is a selfish mindset and even if we are forgiven, we are truly not. 😢
Melanie has a lot of wisdom and is exactly what any good and righteous man needs. Keep up the good work, the Lord is watching you and will present your videos to these wicked women on the day of judgement.
Honestly if a woman is withholding physical intimacy from her husband then the first thing that I'm going to think of is she cheating. No one can go without physical intimacy for very long not even women. If she isn't then she needs to get some therapy herself.
@@NsjsDndjjd I wish there was any attraction involved. I work like a horse. I'm sure slaves have it better than I do. In turn I earn a ton of money, we live in a nice house, and so on. Wife doesn't give a shit. It is just normal to her.
I can . I’ve been seriously battling no sex , no masterbation , everyday getting rejection by women online an off line . It’s really battling my normal nature . It gives such a bad feeling or hopelessness . I work such a physically demanding life risking job . I look like a fitness model with a great smile . It kills me inside that I simple just want to be adored
Great video. I ended a relationship over her not giving me sex every time we had a disagreement. It's emotional and physical blackmail and I won't tolerate it.
The fact you word it as “not giving me sex” just shows how selfish you are and that you only care about your needs being met and not about solving the problem at hand with love and care and communication
The therapist speaking should have been giving a big shout out and social media info! She was spot on! Kaptaivating Konversations is her RUclips channel. Support her! 👏🏽👏🏽
Intimacy is important to me. At the same time I don't want my partner to be resentful towards my need. There may be more to the story, exhausted, overworked, in pain, upset about something. When I feel that way, intimacy (not sex specifically) can help me shed some of that weight, at least for a little while. I'm always hopeful for it.
Stop the bullshit, one time situation where someone is feeling bad is not the topic and you know it. Women use excuses like that all the time because contesting their BS puts you in a bad light whereas admitting that they ration sex for control would do the opposite.
You spend time and energy on the things you value. When you keep saying that you are too tired because of all these other things, the message that is inherent is that he is less important than your job, your friends, the laundry, scrolling on insta, and all of the things you do. Many women think that "I'm too tired" is a good reason, but in reality it's the most insulting and devaluing thing you can say.
I told all my ex-girlfriends and ex-wife the same thing a therapist told me once 10 years ago. "Even a good excuse is still an excuse." Did they ever take heed? Definitely not!
Half of all men work in manual labor jobs...construction, roofing, plumbers, brick layers, electricians, trucking, landscaping, etc........"I'm too tired!".....from what??........Sitting at your desk all day in air conditioning? Pushing the "start" button on the washer? In 2024, very few women, in the USA, are "tired". Stop the madness.
@@Eaglejake Exactly! Try being a solar electrician in all the elements plus the average of hour and a half job commutes daily. WOMEN: " But but?...I have mental stress and PTSD from work!" Yeah cause you're a bird brain!
@@EaglejakeExactly. My dad worked as a roofer for two decades and later as a supervisor for fifteen. That shit is insane. 165 degrees in the summer between ambient and the molten tar. But the guys still showed up every day.
I feel you! My wife has treated me horribly in this manner for years and sometimes long ago ignored me in conversations for weeks. I actually had to create a brand new argument many times just to get her to show her madness just to talk. This last year after 35 years of marriage, I just gave up. Something has happened to me where I just don’t really love her anymore. I act like it, but my feelings have left and don’t want to tell her because I still don’t want to hurt her. So I will die an old man lonely inside and be free. I believe women cause so much pain and unnecessary drama what a beautiful world it could be if they would just listen, open their arms, eyes and see how many of us would die for them.
women have to be sanctioned. no money, no attention and divestment from women. that should crush the feminist economy. in turn we will see further civil strife and unrest. the goal being a non progressive patriarchal revolution.
@@skaterboi65 I was talking in general, not so much about myself. But it's true that over the years I had this experience and also witnessed it in the relationships of different friends and couples I knew.
And this is why some men want to get straight to the sex because it can be a form of Communication, just because you got married , it doesn't mean you stop "dating"
When you love your wife and she shows you love in this way it just makes you want to hug her so tight, caress her hair and tell all the best things in your heart.
I appreciate you ladies being fr with this. This issue is 💯 precursor to stepping out or bitterness. Be like your man saying I’m tired of providing so I’m not going to anymore. Issue 2. Y’all get comfy with this, your health, your weight.
When she cuts you off from sex, transfer all of your money into an account she can't touch, and keep it there. That's where it lives now and forever. Make the money as rare as the sex. "Yes, it's no longer love. It's a transaction. You did that. You won. This is how it is now. You want a bill paid? You need a chore done? Why should I? Tell me that's my job. I dare you."
Married 20 years without a divorce. In any marriage there will be plenty of challenges and sex will fluctuate. Address the issues as they come up. But if she tells you your sex life is over? The marriage is OVER. Leave. She no longer has any regard for you.
I work out all my life because it’s essential and I have been in my job field for 30 years and I make over $100,000. Women confront me all the time but I want to laugh or loose my stomach. I can’t imagine having one of these in my house again
When I wake up at 3:30 am I make my own breakfast pack my own lunch and clean up my mess. I have never ever had a woman make me breakfast or pack my lunch. I went to someone’s house last week the lady friend of my wife made me lunch I didn’t ask for and made me a drink I was working on her back fence. If I work around the yard or working on the cars change the oil repair them I have to fend for myself and wash my own cloths. She won’t make my side of the bed she will leave it. So I have to make it before I leave. My dog sits next to me when I come home my wife won’t zero intimacy, not even a butt grab
It's been 5 years now since my divorce because my ex wife wanted a divorce. That last year of my marriage was a nightmare. She would withhold intimacy for weeks and even months. Two months after we divorced, I found out she had cheated on me with a coworker at the hospital she works at.
The medical field is known for having one of the highest cheating rates when it come to their personal relationships. My guess it has something to do with it's where a lot of "high status" men are.
@@bgrimlan Absolutely, 100%. The worst thing is she didn't even need to work because she had it all. I bought our home, our vehicle, took her on trips and the list goes on. A lot of women are simply ungrateful, deceitful, manipulative and selfish.
Immediately you said hospital 🏥 wasn't surprised, mehhnn 😂😂😂 i have too many promiscuous stories happening at hospitals sad but true. People mess around way too in there! Sorry man you didn't deserve any of that AT ALL!!!
@@scotthearts9634 thanks man. Yeah it's something you don't wish on anyone but that was my 1st and last time I get in a relationship with someone who works at a hospital.
Yeppery In a divorce now She up and told me some excuse about a casual comment I had made several months before Nope ....... No more sex Went from very Hot to very Not in just a couple of months Last year and half I got nothing at all Yes, she is a nurse HHHMMM!?!?!?!? Anyway I was told that she probably found someone new I have learned in life that anything major that happens against me, I usually find out without a whole lot of work or investigating So I am just gonna sit back and wait and see Might take a year but I don't care About 15 years ago, similar circumstances happened Took about 6 months to hear and find out all the minute details 😮😮😮😂😂😂
My attitude has always been as soon as a woman says she "let me do X" I'm out. At the time it happens it may be (should be) mutual. But the moment she starts remembering it as "I let him", it's over. You didn't let me, any more than I let you. They may be the gatekeepers, but this creative memory alteration for personal gain has got to stop. 🙄
This is beyond accurate. They use clever wording to subconsciously establish that power dynamic. They present it like its a gift and a favor she "lets" you enjoy. I always hated that, acting like we are both not benefitting.
@@pablinkz A lot of women are not benefiting from it because the men are lame in bed. I grew up in church where they taught us that sex is only for men’s pleasure and not women’s. They treated women with sexual needs and expectations like they were evil and defective. This was deliberately done to justify a husband being lazy and selfish in bed, easy sex for men, no need for women to finish. Yet, every perversion was a “need” for men. Every fantasy of the husband was a “need” and not just a want. Women who spoke up about their needs were called jezebels.
Unfortunately, some not all women who do this are not going to say you are right, but some will. It's like when a person went to jail then they get out and apply for a job, then the application says "Have you ever been convicted of a crime?" Some women or men, don't want to be told what they did or doing wrong. If people would just swallow there pride " No pun intended lol" people would be more at ease if they just spoke the truth. Simply say, you need to do this to get me to do that and even then, there is omission. If people followed rules for who the rules pertains, their would be less cheating, less waste of time and less divorces. Man, thank you for putting this video together as it seems this is a serious problem and topic that should be discussed more and not be afraid of the tongue lashing from everyone. What ever happened to reading your Bible 1 Corinthians 13 4-8? Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it does not dishonor others, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps record of no wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails....please ladies and gentlemen, if you want to keep your partner, learn your roles as a partner before committing to someone. Mic dropped 🎤🫳 lol😅
I’m divorced and I have a hard time believing in marriage for myself because I fear getting into a situation in which a woman will use my need for sex as a weapon or just fail to understand how important it is to me. Listening to this woman makes me want to believe in marriage again and I wasn’t even sure if that was possible anymore
I'm one of this girls you mentioned: educated, I speak three languages, graduated in international relations, I cook, I clean, but unfortunately lived in a economic struggling country... my boyfriend found me on Instagram, he was telling me how tired he was with the crazy feminist girls in his country and after some time come to visit me, got me a ticket to visit him and during the time I was with him, I always woke up 30 minutes before him to make him breakfast before his work... he was mind blowed and I was like "what? This is the least I can do for everything he is doing to me". Bought me winter clothes, new make up and is going to help me do my masters in his country. Never crossed my mind dening sex to him because he is so sweet and supportive, sex is what makes us understand each other beyond the language barrier. Great advice!!! I will always watch your channel to make sure I'm as good wife as I can be to him!!
Girl you rock can’t wait to hear about the future wedding coming God bless you and your man 😊
You got a sister? Asking for a friend.
You are a great woman. Down to earth and understanding.
I do not believe you.
What i hear in this is something that western women have LOOONNGGG forgotten.. Gratitude. Being grateful for something someone else does for them. I can guarantee that he's grateful to you for what you're doing for him. THAT is how you build a team in a marriage.
When a wife withholds sexual intimacy, her husband will continue to desire sex, but at some point, he will no longer desire his wife. He is better off without her.
Oh, that's a good one. Write that down somewhere; some will need to hear it at some point.
He will look for sex outside. A sex satisfied husband will not look for it outside
You get more of what you reward and less of what you punish. When a wife punishes her husband by withholding sex and physical intimacy, she will get less of his interest, desire, support, time, love, attention. She has so much power that she, all too often, missuses by following the bad advice of her envious and hateful female so-called "friends"
Leaving after 34 years, 17 being sexless. I may be gray, but I make it look good. She has her fat ass on the couch eating chocolate and watching Netflix saying I’m so tired, not tonight. That was 17 years ago 😂😂😂
That is 100% true. For 8 months my wife has been denying me sex. About 5 weeks ago I somehow stopped desiring her and have completely lost interest in sex with her. It wasn't a choice I made, it just happened and I didn't realize it for a couple weeks. Not sure what that means for the marriage, but I guess that will work itself out in time.
15 years I've been in a sexless marriage. I'm tearing up listening to this. I'm 30 days from executing my 5 year exit strategy and filing for divorce. NEVER again will I give a women such power over me through monogamy and marriage! The ladies will be loosing another good man going his own way.
ALL power and godspeed to you, a Man being true to himself.
Hire a PI… she is getting it somewhere else and you just cant figure it out… a private investigator will get her quick… hire a female one since they are expert level w cheating…
Leave man. Leave
The first thing a Man should do is Hire a P.I. when there's a 1st long period of Intimacy and Distance when there's no Childbirth or other Medical complications involved. When she's there with you but still isn't Initiating anything.
You will atleast find out Someone has her emotionally and Ready to Betray you . 90% of the time atleast.
Indian food makes my stool loose.
My ex-wife used the I don't feel safe excuse. I asked her to move out and filed for divorce. Don't waste my time.
You are another vile misogynist. You refused to do anything to make her feel safe, or to make sex worth it for her. None of you have the balls to respect women .
My wife denied sex, for the most part, to me for the last 15 years we were married. But she used sex to get other men interested in her as soon as she left me. A story old as time.
Yup. I've come to that conclusion as well, after living through the same thing with a number of women over the years. Unless you be one of those chad/jerome types that all women swoon to spread for, sex with you is just a tool and a weapon to suck you in then control you in a relationship, strictly for their benefit.
Yeah my wife friend zoned me in our marriage I hated it. I paid 75% of the bills got treated like crap long story
@@dave3987
75%? Lucky. I wish that was the case. My wife just taps TikTok all day on the couch, 0 work. It took me years of fighting to get her to cook. We went from 100% home ordered meals to around 50%. Oh, she also does laundry. Nothing else though. 99% of women born after the 80s are garbage.
No way in hell would I stay with my husband if he denied me sex for long periods of time.
Sadly woman use sex as a fishing hook once they feel confident u aint going nowhere they weponize it
My 1st marriage was marred with weaponized sexual frequency. We discussed and agreed over it for YEARS before I stepped out.
I stayed in this sexless marriage for 23 years until our youngest was 20. That's when she got a boyfriend.
I filed for divorce and she decided to go to war.
She created a lie of abuse and attempted murder. I was taken in a questioned by police. She told our adult children to try and separate us. And she filed THIRTY NINE motions in court trying to take my retirement. Fortunately it didn't work. I was granted my divorce and was allowed ro keep my retirement.
After 3 years of therapy and rebuilding myself, I finally found someone who adores me.
Your story really gets me to think that maybe if you are filing for divorce to set up some video cameras in the home a few weeks before she knows you are filing, just to show some day to day life and how she isn't scared. Sometimes the boring would really be telling of the situation.
I have heard other stories like yours. I have always told guys to get and keep receipts. It is the only thing that will some what save your ass once she starts lying and society belives her.
For now
HOLY F'ING WOW.
Happy for my Brother
There are millions of married men who haven't had sex in DECADES. You ladies talk about 3 days, or a month. Thank you for the work you are doing. You could save the country.
Decades indeed, and millions of us... and that tells you who broke the vow. It said 'forsaking all others' but not 'and you too, buddy'.
I just ran across this, and you are 100% correct. There was a study I read about 2006/2007 about prostate cancer. It was over 80% of the men had been in a sexless marriage for years. The study consisted over 3000 men. My marriage consisted of occasional sex the first 3 years. Then in went to maybe once a month then to zero for the last 6 years.
1. Melanie's hair is looking FANTASTIC today
2. 90% of us regular guys just wanna be able to be intimate with ONE WOMAN for the rest of our lives....maybe 95% of us guys.
3. Don't give us a reason to look elsewhere. Because we will.
Maybe 85%
@@burnthrust Thank you both for your wild arsed guesses :-) Let us just say it's likely a good majority of men.
And that's a Full and Total ABSOLUTE FACT!!!
One woman ain't enough for me :\
Well, make that 80%
I am Christian. I have come to learn that sex is so important that even the bible puts great emphasis on not denying your spouse sex.
According to the bible even the fact that you want to spend time with the Lord should never be a reason to deny your spouse sex, unless, of course, he/she allows you.
If prayer cannot be a bar to sex then what excuse can there be to deny sex to your other half
MORE. Women want more. They think it will motivate a man to give them more.
Then they will ask for intangibles. Give me more Time, but go work, earn more, save and build up to make us rich but buy me money wasteful things constantly.
Have a brother-in-law who had a dog that would only take food from him. No one else. Not even my sister. Brought that dog everywhere, wouldn't go an any vacation/trip where he couldn't bring the dog. I once asked him about it, wouldn't the dog just finally eat if it got hungry enough, couldn't he board it somewhere for a day or two-- again, the dog would probably eat?
His response, "When you train a dog to only get fed by you, you F'g make sure it gets fed.!!"
Hell yes.
Ouuu 😮 that was good
In the voice of Adam Sandler’s character Billy Madison, “you get out there and you find that f-ing dog!”
Bazinga.
According to my Wife, I just need to forget about it and go without it for the REST OF MY LIFE. "It's no big deal!" Won't kiss, won't embrace, refuses to engage in anything that would lead to close physical intimacy. Just decided, it's over - but I have to be faithful, and fulfill my duties without fail.
This!!!
Wow. Divorce her, she broke a vow
Respectfully - why are you still there? What is your why? Cause if assume it has to be something outside of yourself....
Hate to hear you're going through this man.
Exit stage left
Nope. All bets are off when only one partners needs are a concern.
It is refreshing to hear a woman talk the truth today.
More men are deciding women are too mcuh problems for so little ROI.
Facts! I have more than a few seeking a relationship from me and I don’t see any value in giving up my freedom just to be with them. No ROI just debt!!
And men are suffering for it. Women are still winning.
@@ThurstMETV
Pump and dump is the only path to gain anything from a relationship with the vast majority of women.
Exactly, why chase problems and infrequent sex while paying all the bills, hell nah
I’ve been saying this for the longest time. High risk with no reward doesn’t make sense.
Wife: you're my man, so I don't want you eating at anyone else's house.
Husband: ok, honey.
Wife: and I don't want you ordering takeout either; it's my responsibility to feed you.
Husband: that's fine, honey.
Wife: and stay out of my kitchen; if you want something to eat, I'll cook it for you.
Husband: that's great, honey.
Husband: I'm hungry, what's for dinner?
Wife: I don't feel like cooking today... this week...this month... this year.
Warning: when a man goes into true starvation, there comes a point where they don't even want to eat anymore. Soon after, they die.
That’s deep
...That escalated quickly
Yeah, the true starvation stage is hell.
Wow.
@@quoisegames1937but that is reality. Shit like this happens a lot I know from experience and witnessing as well
I never deny my husband. His love language is touch, and though I could likely go weeks without touching anyone lol, he cannot. I make the effort to hug and kiss him throughout the day. It makes him happy which makes me happy. We can't wait to be empty nesters. 😘
When she thinks she has you, and also believes you cannot get it somewhere else, you can best believe she is going to start pretending to be "Too Tired"...
God bless you, when she knows you have no options she's going to punish you with sex, but if you got options she's gonna be on her ten toes to keep you and to give you everything you want.
It's gross.
Maybe a second wife could fix this issue? "Ok fine then me and nancy will knock boots, you can watch. Oh, thats not fair? Nancy thinks its a great idea....whats that?.....no i love you both equally but you keep denying me....what? Youd like to join in? Thats what i thought go get the chocolate syrup and my Indiana Jones hat! Its time to explore the forbidden tombs!" (Insert Indiana Jones ost here)
@@PissedoffChristianDamn you, I actually started humming the theme song😂 10/10
@melkerner
As a woman, I just don’t understand where these other women are coming from. I desire and love my husband so much, even little things about him are so alluring to me. I have never turned him down, because I not only love him, but always desire to please him and show my devotion to him. Women: You should wake up every day and think “How can I be a better wife that is worthy of my husband?”
Women of today think too highly of themselves to think that. They would feel like slaves thinking like that.
Emily, well my hats off to you. Your husband is a good man AND A LUCKY MAN. This exact thing happened to me within 18 months from the starting blocks…….….and I toughed it out and went on to have a rocking small biz for 15 years, but after almost 20 years I get this unexplained 4 year TOTAL deprivation period, which nearly literally killed me.
The little hole clean thru the hallway is still there… yes I decided to leave and it’s still there as I refuse to fix it as a reminder of what was done to me WITH ZERO REASON GIVEN. Yes I became physically ill a few years earlier had to sell my business and stopped making 150-200k plus a year and ironic as hell, the treatment I received changed shortly thereafter for some strange damn reason, yet I can’t figure out WHY?!
Now I wasn’t a wheelchair bound veggie by a long shot either. Just too variable to be able to work that 65-80 hour small biz any more….. ohm h I forgot, she got that social media addiction that then polluted her mind with a dose of feminism. Not rabid, but enough that I could tell.
And after 27 years, 8 years of it hell for me, I can’t say I see any other path…..until that path is presented and then it’s trail time for sure……. Feel like the biggest sucker, defrauded from day one with this AND plenty of other crap too…….. yes, DEFRAUDED.
Yet I must say, I was the sucker that bought that ticket to shitzville , so yes I accept the responsibility of making that absolute shit decision.
Young men out there, unless you are willing to bet your life x100 on it, don’t do it. Just DONT. Cause it’s more than likely gonna shred you……:(((
That makes you a unicorn. You might think "Ah, no, I'm sure X% of people have a fine relationship.", but nuh-uh, those are just fake facebook relationships and lies.
Although, I'm pretty sure your husband still wants to do it more frequently than you. Male libido, especially a healthy one is a force of nature that dwarfs female libido.
It is because they actually get in relationships for other reasons besides him they never wanted him from the start
Because you got married to your husband because you love him. It seems that a lot of women get married to have the wedding not because they love their husband
Eventually after being in a sexless situation for months or years a guy just gives up and doesn't try anymore.
... or, instead of giving up, he heads to SE Asia to discover, to his amazement, that he's not that bad after all.
@@petermathieson5692 I meant giving up on a relationship. Not on women all together. Agreed SE Asia is MUCH better than the US.
I quit trying to initiate sex with my wife years ago because I can’t take the constant rejection. It got bad enough that I now don’t want to sleep in the same bed with her anymore. Just being right there is too painful to take
Yup, replaced my cold white ex with a Filipina🔥@@petermathieson5692
A man still needs sex and his body will still pressure him. Live more! You deserve more and you must never give up on having a good marriage.
Divorce. God allows it and he wants you to find a good woman.
No person is entiteled to forbid sex for another person for their entire life. If a wife decided to ban sex this is what she has done - she forbids the husband of having sex outside the marriege while prohibiting it within the marriage. This is a sadistic abuse. Such a woman must inform her husband of her choice and free him of any obligation to her - she ended the marriage.
Sadistic abuse is the perfect description!
I decided to refuse them after they weaponized sex. It ended both marriages. Them threaten ing to be outside the marriage made me say go ahead. It's the next guys mistake with you and not me.
Starfish sex feels gross like grape
As a man, I agree that we can tell when our wives arrive at the point where they grant us obligation sex whether that is once a week, twice a month, or twice a year.. We long for the connection/intimacy we once had and eventually fantasize about improving our situation while knowing/feeling that we should keep the family together for the sake of the children. I'll do the 20 year prison term (I've already done 18) and then hope for life on the other end of that time. I'm a traditional guy, but have to say that I couldn't recommend marriage to any man.
And they want to spend all of your money at the same time
Truth.
Marriage is not beneficial to men.
Great pitch for Marriage! This dies out with the older generation. Marriage is not worth it today. Dead bed, paternity fraud, 50% loss... What's the benefit??
I get the sense your wife is in for a rude but well-deserved awakening in a couple years.
If a woman fail to understand the importance of having a healthy balance between her career life and her household life, it's a lost cause.
The line that went something to the effect that men don't share their everyday struggles with their wife or partner is so true. Women have no idea how hard men work and it is not just that the work is hard. If it was just that work was hard, men would have no problem with it. It is all the other BS that we have to deal with to get through a week of work knowing that we have to keep our mouth shut on injustices that we get while working knowing that no one cares if we complain.
Ur actions speak instead of ur words. Walk off . If ur presence don't matter to her. Now u know how she REALLY feels. That tells u EVERY thing u need
100%!
I've said this many times in my circle of friends and family. There is a saying "happy wife, happy life". I will expand on that for women "a peaceful man will do all he can"!
Im stealing this one! I love it man! 😂
Im stealing this from F&F podcast "Happy King, Happy Kingdom"
That's great!!
"Happy Spouse, Happy House"
Sorry Man....,that's not Your Qoute anymore.....
Now its OUR Qoute.
When I was Married. It was used as a obedience tool. After awhile I said if you keep it up, I will find a replacement. She laughed and kept doing it. I found a replacement and never bother her with it. After awhile she was curious and asked why. I said I found a replacement and told to find someone else who will play the game. Life in the Matrix.
I’m a single woman but I’m learning about how to be a wife based on these kind of videos. Thanks!
Rooting for you, go get em!
It's honestly never too early or too late. I just started a relationship and Melanie's channel has really helped me understand what I need to do as a girlfriend and maybe even a wife someday. I have a great man and I don't wanna lose him. I'm tellin' you girl, once you get that good man, you'll thank her.
@@bethanyboarder7751 Amen to that! Gotta know how to treat a man.
Godbless you, sister. May you find the man who will make it all worth it for you.
@@williamhermann6635 thank you
It is written " Let the husband render to his wife the affection due to her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. Because the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body but the wife does. And do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self control."
Is that from the New World Translation?
Amen.
Apostle Paul to Corinthians.
How many women do you think percentage wise pay attention to this?
@@fan-i-amlol you know it is
Keep sharing the knowledge. My ex told me “I guess I need to do my duty.” I told her to box it up and keep it. That was 7 years ago.
Yes it is 100% abuse to deny intimacy to your husband or wife.
Same goes for boyfriend and girlfriend it’s all the same it’s narcissistic to do so
@@andrewgardner1727 nah bf and gf are different, husband and wife are from God amd should be treating each other like one flesh, and we wouldn't abuse our own flesh
@@thebigree6155 agree but no human who says they care about you should do that to anyone……
@@andrewgardner1727 I also agree but I'm just a stupid human so I've given up sex until I'm married, but looking at the way the world is now that's a long while away
@@thebigree6155 not stupid just was properly raised and know the meaning to love and intimacy and truthfully most woman don’t deserve it now a days make all that effort for what to get cheated on or discarded or divorced no thanks to the streets they belong and will hit the wall and when they do don’t contact me
This is still the “VIDEO OF THE YEAR” Sis. You Ladies brought the house down! Much love, keep it coming… I want to send it to my wife but feel that it will be a “waste of time”😢
She'll cut it off after about 2 min max is my guess..
😢
@@thoroughtheexec dang, 2 mins would be generous.
@@rockdawg2511 all good.
If she withholds sex, it's over. Withhold being a husband.
This post really touched me. I feel that my marriage could have been saved had we watched this together.
idk man. Do you really believe that? I think for that, the other party has to be somewhat recipient of the information presented. I doubt that could've been happening. If it could've, than the situation couldn't have got escalated to the breaking point.
If I ever get married for a second time (that's a real big IF) I will be making it VERY clear that if she decides at some point that she no longer wants to fulfill my needs in the bedroom, that I will go get those needs fulfilled elsewhere. My first wife, when she was my gf, was wild and insatiable in bed for literal YEARS until we got married, then the excuses started and the frequency dropped off a cliff - I will not be put in that position again. Just because you got a ring doesn't mean you can just stop trying.
Been through the same thing. After our son was born we did it 2-4 times a year. I actually had the wisdom of discussing this topic with her at the start of the relationship like you described. It made no change. I discussed the topic with her every few months: what's the matter, why there is no sex, why she doesn't have a sex drive, how can we improve. That talk usually results to one very bad sexual act, but zero improvement for the future. I begin to think that for the vast majority of women you can not win this war, and you need to be keeping office wives, banging other women, or just not settle and change relationships every few years.
Problem is she’ll say anything to get you to sign. Then pull the bait and switch. It’s the marriage wheel never fails
Yall would be dumb to get married lol
I knew not to get married at a young age I never been so into a woman I needed to merry her
Something my father told me when I met my now "wife" of 22 years is that the title of wife does not replace boyfriend. It's an additional title. The same goes for girlfriend to wife.
I remember in my early 20s I lived with a woman. We were together for 4 years but about 18 months in she decided that we weren't going to have Intimacy anymore. I'd try to initiate and she'd reject me. I was very confused because up to that point she was very receptive. It came to a head one night when she said, 'I don't see why we can't just not have sex anymore'. She had basically decided that we weren't having sex again, but she had up to then neglected to tell me.
I was quite young so I thought maybe this is how relationships worked. I figured, leave it be and maybe the Intimacy will come back. It did a year later but only after another woman in our group started showing interest in me. Nothing happened between us, but my partner turned the Intimacy back on to keep me from leaving, I guess. Then 6 months later it was gone again. What ended the relationship? She cheated on me. Can you fking believe it? She cheated. That one relationship kinda fked up my relationships for life after that.
It took about 20 years before I could trust a woman again. And even with my now wife, I'm so reticent to initiate Intimacy through fear of rejection because of that first relationship experience. Despite my wife being up for it all the time. I still feel as though I'm doing something bad or wrong when ever I initiate Intimacy with my wife.
That's really screwed up.
Dude, you need to grow a pair and call up your ex and have her hear you having sex with your wife
Understandable.
Nah - she was cheating on you when the sex dried up first time, she just didn't get caught and couldn't convince the other guy to let her move in. That other woman probably knew she was cheating on you, so to keep her secret and meal ticket in tack - she turned it back up. Think the worse and it's probably true with women - take it from a former single dad of 2 teen girls.
can empathise with you. SImilar thing happened with me in my mid 20s. She was "Demi Moore" in Disclosure at the beginning and went on to become a nagging, no intimacy no initiation and just vanilla ok i'll do it woman towards the end of the relationship. And then she cheated on me. I, who had built her up emotionally after she had had a terrible relationship was cheated on and made to feel like I was worse than her previous bf who had even threatened to make her nude pictures public online. Mind you, this was in the late 2000s when spicy pics were a taboo unlike how common it has become. I gave it my all in that relationship but was made to feel worse than a blackmailing pervert. Never could I give it my all in the next few relationships and none of them worked.
As of now, I am 40 and single and truly happy. I know no matter how loving and traditional some women can be, a marriage/relationship will become like living with roommates. I get some action once in a while but it's no longer priority. I just love riding my motorcycles, travelling. MGTOW
I've never heard any woman say the things that was being said in this video. It's the honest truth, and women seem to want to deny that this is what they are doing to the man in their lives. Abuse hadn't even crossed my mind this way. My ex-wife had given me a sex-less marriage, and didn't seem to want to give me any for one reason or another. So I turned to porn and took it upon myself to take care of my natural needs that way. Not long before our divorce i decided to talk to her about it. She told me, "let's go into the bedroom and you can have your way with me". There was apparently a lot of resentment that she had been holding on to, and not once did she talk to me about what was bothering her, so I was able to fix it. That was the last time I had any kind of intimacy with her. We divorced and I said goodbye and went my own way. It's a sad thing when a woman that calls herself your wife and doesn't......refuses.....please her husband in ways that was meant to be, and not just for the man, but for herself as well. I'm not interested in getting married ever again.
If there's a woman in this world that doesn't manipulate her man, communicates with her man, loves her man in all ways and simply treats her man like he's her one and only, respects him, supports him, gives him at least a few hugs and kisses in the morning before going to work and when he comes home from work and encourages him when he needs it, then please let me know who you are. I can reciprocate the same way for you as you would for me. Who knows, maybe you can convince me in changing my mind about marriage. Women are so ignorant and selfish these days.
Rough, man I read that and thought, after all of that now you want to give it up? My pettiness would have went into overdrive.
We do exist! My heart breaks at these stories and I want to assure men all over that not all women are the selfish, manipulative kind of person they've known. I thank God that I was raised by Christian, homeschooling parents who taught me to keep myself pure and be a loving, selfless, joyful woman. I am excited to be a wife if it's God's will, and I have already made the decision to rebel against this mold of abusive wives. I'm going to be eager, vocal in my adoration and desire, and sex-positive. Praise to the Lord that I have a healthy view of sexuality as a gift from God. It's not dirty, or boring, or bad.
@@annahenderson2155 you are a very rare person (unicorn, as they say these days). I appreciate those that can live with thier beliefs and swim against the tides of society. Blessed be you, with all your goals in life on a daily basis 🙏
@@kirkmilliren9218 Thank you very much. That is kind. I want to speak hope to people who have endured rough things in life. And I want to give men in particular the assurance that there are good women out there who reject today's self-centered view of sex and marriage. Ultimately, I think it goes back to the very root of love, which is a selfless decision to put someone else first. Love is not a feeling you fall into. That's not to say that feelings and attraction and desire don't play into it; they do. But true love is a daily, sacrificial choice. How glorious marriages would be if both spouses were doing that! Of course the basis for that love is only found in Jesus. I think and live this way because I have been given that undeserved love from Him, so I want to give it to others. I pray you find healing and a new, refreshed path in life.
Stay single and don't bother dating
This is called being manipulative and incentivizing cheating. Please don’t do this ladies
You act like they don't know what they're doing.
Please? It's like if you are begging someone.
That's not the way.
Too late, but I appreciate the optimism
It’s narcissism it’s everywhere now a days they will never wake up
i don't think cheating women care about this. they would just like it to be easier to cheat. it's good men's fault. they're too naive to understand.
Our sexdrive is 11X that of a womens. Men not having sex in a relationship is like women being told not to spend money for a day.
Not true. Women have high sex drive...sometimes they just have it for someone else...iyk, yk
"I'm too tired to give you attention or conversation"
Actually, that's a total myth. Women are just the same... but it's only for Chads.
Lolno, when they have genuine desire for you they'll make YOU tired if sex because of how much they want. It's almost never the case though because they use it to trap a high value guy, so it won't apply for most people and often stop after marriage even with top men.
My sex drive is not less than a man’s. I want sex just as much. I couldn’t imagine not wanting to have sex … 😅
Two intelligent women on one channel! Awesome moment!!
I was married twice, this happened twice, I got divorced twice. They both tried to spin the block, I told them no
“The emotional circle jerk of the sisterhood”. Nicely said.
and their male orbiters are circle jerking each other as well. these women have no power in society without these white knights.
She described it perfectly! Throw out all the books and wasted money on therapist. She said that "He needs sex from You to feel VALUABLE!" Men fight battles of all different kinds , and alot of times, comes Home Wounded and beat from those battles. In my opinion, there is nothing more important that You can do (because You have the ability to do it) than to make Him feel VALUABLE, so that He is ready to go back out and keep fighting. Because He is fighting for You and Your Family!
Withholding sex in marriage is grounds for marriage annulment. Not divorce but annulment. Annulment cancels the marriage and there is no division of property just restitution to the position before marriage.
Not where I am. The deal legally starts from day one regardless of sexual access.
@@lawshorizon the word I used was annulment not divorce. One of the pillars for annulment is one of the parties being unable to fulfil their sexual ligations in marriage and that is grounds for annulment. The Roman Catholic church allows annulment of marriage on such grounds and the secular court has to follow the situation and grant a divorce in parallel. Annulment means the marriage never happened or if it did it no longer exists which is not the case with divorce. If my wife would refuse to have sex with me then I would seek an annulment and get it quicker than a divorce without the financial baggage that a divorce entails. It is an argument that secular courts cannot refute since marriage in the Roman Catholicism church is a sa
Sacrament not a contractual obligation.
How can i get an annulment
It does not matter what people think about this. The state in which you live will tell you whether they consider you to be married. Some states in the USA do not require you to sign papers to be considered married in the eyes of the state. Mine is one of them. Check your state laws!
Trust me fellas just because she is withholding sex does NOT mean you as a man did something wrong. Most of the times is cuz she's giving it to someone else. And of course when that is the case it is NATURAL for her to gaslight YOU!
I have been through this whole situation. Never again. It was the best decision ever made.
@@anthonybaker5199too many men assume responsibility whenever their woman is upset at them instead of realizing she is cold enough to gaslight after doing wrong
@TCBBB22 My ex is the 👸 of gaslight. 😂
You are completely and absolutely wrong, most of the time a woman withholds sex is because the man is neglecting her emotionally and isn’t helping her do any household chores!! And gaslighting is NOT something that all women do! You saying that is what’s actually gaslighting.
@@winxclubstellamusaThe more you help the more she'll resent you.
Because she knows she's mistreating you.
Not just sex being withheld, but respect for him as a man and what he does for the family the two of you have. Respect for him also is a part of this sex deal, you show him the respect he needs as a man by doing so. You take those two things away from him, and you will most definitely lose him eventually. I know, I had a marriage like that.
The irony in this is there will be approximately zero women watching this video, and if they did they wouldn't get it anyway.
Exactly theyll only critisize our lady Melanie.
You are 100% correct.
100%
Women don't have the ability to admit they are the problem. It's easier to find a five leaf clover than to find a woman who will hear this and get anything out of it.
I’m a woman watching this video and I found it to be helpful and educational. It honestly explains what a man needs far better than the men do themselves.
I was in a sexless marriage for 15 years. Was told if I did A,B,C she would be in the mood. When I did A,B,C she would come up with X,Y,Z. There was ALWAYS a reason. Until one day she admitted that she did not want to have sex, ever. She just had no sex drive and wouldn’t do anything to address the problem.
It wasn’t long after that I found a woman who wanted me and understood the importance of sex. We have now been together for 12 years. Still have a regular sex life. Happiest I have ever been.
Women, if you don’t give your man what he needs, someone else will.
My ex has had 4 boyfriends that I know of. Still single.
Moving the goal post is the MOD of this movement🙄
The problem is they think the dating world is equal to men and women , most men don't want them men just want sex they're delusional
Wow 4 bf? Maybe she really doesn't desire sex then. Some folks are like that. Asexual is the term. But they are otherwise romantic in relationships.🙂
As a happily married woman (32 years), you are spot on!
I remember talking with friends 20 years ago, when all of our children were very young. Of course raising small children was tiring at times! I told this one mom that I asked my husband to pick an evening chore he didn’t mind doing…that I could count on his doing. Washing dinner dishes? Bathing the children? Putting the children to bed with books? (It could change, but it needed to be a night time chores.) I explained to my husband that if I was not exhausted after the children went to bed, I would have more energy to be HIS plaything before bedtime. He was all in! It worked VERY well for us!
My friend was really irritated with me and said, “Well, my husband would do chores if I BRIBED him with sex, too!”
I replied, “So, that’s a bad thing?? Win-Win!”
I would only disagree with one point. After menopause, there have been many times that my body just could not reach orgasm as easily as previous years, and I lovingly told my husband, “Please take this in the spirit of love. I am willing to ‘take one for the team’, so to speak.”
I was/am happy to pleasure him fully knowing my body would not orgasm. All I asked was that it not be as long of a love making session. It would start really hurting after too long. Sometimes he would respond with, “I’d rather wait for you to join in the fun,” but sometimes he said, “Yes, please.”
Y’all may call that “lazy sex” or “starfish sex,” but if my body just could not orgasm, what other option is there? Besides, he has said sometimes he really enjoys those times because it can be ALL ABOUT HIM!❤
The key is you both communicated and had a conversation. You compromised but not without telling your truth and it was still in a way that honored you both. Health concerns are a valid reason sex may change, but even then, there are ways to work through it.
What you did is exactly what you are supposed to do in any issue in a relationship but even more so with sex and intimacy, as that is physically bonding you two together. Thanks for sharing your story.🙂
@@jacobclayton2954 Thanks. I have been surprised over the years at how many couples are afraid to talk about sex. “It’s too personal…” 😳
HAVING sex is personal!!! Talking about it is exponentially less personal!!
I do recommend having sex talks when you are not revved up! There needs to be no emotion or sexual tension during these talks. Men can get angry, due to testosterone I am guessing, and women can shut down. Both are horrible for any discussion, but can jade future discussions. (Especially for women as we have elephant memories when it come to that kind of thing.🤣)
Sex is usually 99% physical when you're young.
Get in your forties and fifties, it should become more connection. Sadly, wives by then wonder why their husbands begin to show more interests in hobbies than being with them.
Their "tank" is empty.
Me and a lot other men try to act like it's not a need but deep inside we know it is.
It's not really the lack of sex, if she were a paraplegic or something, it would be fine. With every kid (6) we had, there was a 6 week gap of no sex, never hurt my ego one bit. It is the constant rejection and feeling that she is annoyed at your presence.
Imagine if every time she came near you, you told her that she smells bad and looks ugly and you don't want to touch her. Or every time she opened her mouth, you just reply with, "That was a stupid comment". That is essentially what they are doing.
It’s not a need it’s a want. You need to harness your sexual desires into other things. The Bible says let a man marry if he cannot suppress his desire for sex otherwise it is best to stay a bachelor
you just have no self control
Laura, that is idiotic. A man with no self control would force himself on her. A wife denying sex is manipulative and breaking the wedding vows. She is tearing apart the family.
My ex-wife did that, among other things. She was borderline like Amber Heard. She has cats and decades of unhappiness, I got a new wife and we've been married for DECADES.
Brother, does your wife have a sister maybe? lol
thats what they do, is they end up being cat ladies in their old age
Finally someone holds the women accountable
.. on my 54 y o i also hold women's accountability when they talk with caucious about things that keeps them busy, and do this without velvet gloves ..🤫🤭🙄
Unless the current corrupt divorce laws change then this is only going to get worse. There is now 0 benefits for men to marry and plenty of risks. Living in a sexless marriage is pure hell and I will never go through that again.
You don’t have to worry about any of that if you know how to hide a body.
..sexuality among common people is also always related to 'power' and eventually any kind of corruption.. it's seems to be inherent and leads to weaponized it.. when these kind of things would'nt happen, there's also less perverted or violent situations my guess.. 'power' , status, m o n e y and h o n e y should be in the right amount and balance..Globally that is..😊🤫😉
How many married guys are lonely, frustrated and depressed because their spouses "aint feeling it"?? Plenty. And women wonder why men dont feel close to them. Because we dont feel loved or appreciated. And when the guy finds another woman to share affection with, they cry about being abandoned, cheated on and whatever.
I hear you loud and clear... Just reading this resonates loudly to what I'm dealing with... I love my wife but I'm so torn and just very depressed, crying....
@@chakabegood i hear ya.
I dealt with this. They become lazy. They got their needs. They forget yours.
Right most women think denying sex is ok but cheating is bad. Denying sex to a partner for long periods is no better than cheating. I've told this to women and explained how sexual neglect is abuse. Of course they never understand and disagree.
@@cur244 100% correct
Hello Melanie! Thank you for your honesty, we men need more women like you exposing the truth about the way women are behaving, I’m a married man, my wife filed for divorce because she doesn’t love me anymore, she says she’s given me everything, I was busy busting my ass working hard to provide for my family and never saw that coming.
If you are not married yet and this is happening get out now, before you start counting how long its been in months. Its better to be alone than be alone lying beside someone.
100% Listen young brothers. It's damned hard to lay next to the one woman you promised to love forever when she has no interest in being intimate. I'm in too deep to leave right now but learn a lesson from someone who has lived it.
I'm in that situation right now and I have decided to walk away from this situationship.
@@chunkyd5880If you have children wait until grown and off your hands then get out. Relationship with your children will hold good.
@@chunkyd5880me too brother
You gotta know when to fold em!
I can’t believe that there is someone , not just someone , but 2 women on this podcast talking about everything I’m going through. I’ve held on 14 years in this marriage and 27 in my first marriage. I’m 60 and it never gets fixed 😢
When a man gets to a point in a relationship where he's having to beg for sex.... it's time for that relationship to end
No doubt
I think with the body counts of Western American women today it is extremely hard for them to pair bond to just one man after experiencing so many different men in their lives. Sex to them just becomes a chore in exchange for resources from a man!
I think this point is not mentioned enough. Notice how a lot of guys in these comments say they've been married for 15+ years. That means they got married in the early 2000s. Feminism was in full swing and women were hooking up with multiple guys before marriage even before social media.
These women destroyed their ability to pair bond by having multiple sex partners before marriage and their husbands paid the price.
Absolutely agree
@@RsZ789True. I was fortunate to find a loyal country girl in 2002. Been me and her ever since.
CORRECTION: Not Western American women! You mean, " Westernized Wretched Wicked Wenches of Whoredom!"
@@RsZ789 I don't think this is true. Some women's sex drive just dries up from being mothers and becoming busy. Though with women now also working jobs its probably worse. With how common this stuff is they can't all be cheaters.
Dealt with it for 20+ years of that type of abuse. Went a full year without because she was mad. I didn't drift off I stayed in it. Well, now in the divorce process. Was tired of the weaponized use of it. Plus I was never "good" enough in that department. Wanted therapy for us. She said no. I said separate, she called the cops and had me removed. No legal means of fighting it due to the divorce laws. Now trying to build back.
She get half of your stuff? Money, house, cars, etc.
@@beezytalkingshit9319 It's the way they can manipulate the Protective order system without repercussions on false allegations. Because in these type of situations you are guilty until proven innocent.
@@Smokey_TwoGunz And they say they want EQUALITY!! smh! These bihs can't spell the word! We got it bad when it comes to being believed about something. If a woman say it happened, everyone automatically believes her. Look at the Johnny Depp situation! I don't believe anything a woman says unless she has proof.
@@Smokey_TwoGunz Stay well away from wimmin from now on
I don't even know where to begin after that wisdom !!!! Any man that gets one of these ladies, IS A BLESSED BLESSED MAN !! Talking with a buddy and his wife, not on sexual part, but even just being sweet or women giving a man ONE compliment !! I told her, that other than my mom, sister, or a close family friend, I have not had a woman give me even a simple compliment in 15 plus years !! You are a hard worker .... you're a nice looking guy ... you seem like a good man ..... Women would have men lining up for them if they ever got back to that just once a week !!!
They dont want you in their line.
If a woman is withholding sex from there man he will stray because he is hurt. Number one reason women withhold sex from their husband because they're cheating on them
She could possibly be getting it somewhere else. It happened to me. That was the warp after that. I'm enjoying my single life now. 😂👍🏽
No, the number one reason is the man not helping in doing any household chores, and neglecting the woman emotionally!! Haven’t you read the articles about this? Housework is EXHAUSTING, and every woman needs her husband’s help to do at least some chores. You have no idea what you are talking about.
will men ever ask should we take away their privileges?
@@FazeParticles rights aren’t privileges, they are bare minimum requirements and necessities!! Do you seriously think that it’s a “privilege” for women to finally be regarded as people now as opposed to property??!
@@winxclubstellamusayeah sure 👍🏻
Melanie, your doing gods work by showing these videos. Thank you dear.
"when you tell him, you can't help how you feel... so then consider that when he cheats, he can't help how he feels"
NAILED IT.
It's like starving too death. The deepest hunger. Stronger than any drug on the planet.
Bro you are so dramatic 😭
not really
Control your urges you not a animal your a man stop watching porn and take control of your mind im 21 and i dont watch porn i control my urges
I actually agree. Sex is like oxygen. When you’re not getting any it’s all you can think about. At 69 it’s still true.
@@LordHaragnokbetter get your hormones checked
When a man and woman marry their needs becomes the other's sacred duty.
Marriage has nothing to do with love. The mistake people make, is thinking it does.
Marriage was for legitimate progeny and transfer of resources. In many cases a man could also have concubines to fulfill his sexual needs. If we could go back to that philosophy, many of these problems go away.
@@GBU61
No, just more problems in addition to your spouse, would come.
I could not possibly have said it any better, you vocalized what I have thought for years. thank you.
Love you Melanie. I went through a marriage similar to what you are speaking about and it was difficult to recover from because it made me feel worthless and undesirable by women. It’s a tough situation to go through because you as a man start to blame yourself and it’s tough to share with anyone because as a man you are taught to suck it up and deal with it. Thanks for your understanding about these types of situations that men go through.
Another Young lady showing us how to build healthy relationships. Always a win. Awesome.
REAL LOVE IS RARE. FAKE LOVE IS EVERYWHERE 💯
This resonates so much Melanie, I can't believe there's support out there. I was in EXACTLY this situation, and after several years in a sexual no man's land, succumbed to interest from elsewhere. I'm not proud of myself, but my wife takes absolutely no accountability whatsoever, it's all my fault!! I didn't sign up for a sexless marriage...there's nothing wrong with her physically, she just couldn't be bothered anymore, so wasn't going to do it just to please me she said. She changed the goalposts as far as I'm concerned, but I'm the villain as I knew I would be.
I dont know why some women think that its a good idea to withhold intimacy from their husbands. As if he couldnt find it from someone else. Which is basically what she's doing, pushing him away into the arms of another woman. But then will be mad when she gets cheated on.
At that point her opinion is worth less than dirt.
It's also just extremely cruel and childish. Talk about your problems like a grown up
This is pure Gold! My appreciation to these two ladies and all the real ladies out there.
"His hand wants him more than his wife."
-Myself
I’ve been married twice, busted my ass at work 40+ hours a week at blue-collar jobs to economically provide for my family, and yet, with all the money, respect, and romantic things that I did for my spouse, I was always snubbed by both spouses after the wedding day. My spouses stopped performing and meeting my needs, started b****ing and nagging everyday about everything, and blaming me for all of their problems (before and after we met), so I stopped sharing my money, my cars, my bed, my cooking (and I’m damn fine cook), and I stopped sharing everything else. Love, romance, connection, and a long-term relationship takes work, effort, time, investment, education, and a responsibility to fulfill one’s duties in a relationship. I wanted a spouse, but I ended marrying (2 marriages) children in grown up bodies. Thank you for making this video. I hope many single and married men and women take this to heart.
Never cook for a woman.
This is a solid video for the ages! It will be immortalized and applicable for all eternity.
I was tortured but an abusive wife for 11 years. We had intimacy 55 times in that time. Thank you for talking about this intimacy famen.
Probably all 55 times in the first 1-2 years.
When they torture the man he does have a "purpose" in her paradigm, in her "system" per say....
Anniversary, 2 birthdays, new years, valentines day - 5 times a year times 11 years equals 55. I am sure beginning/end of marriage has some stacks, or my dates I chose were the wrong ones, but confident it was generally treated like a chore - like cleaning gutters once a year.
OMG, they make it bad enough where a man has to disrespect himself to take some...@@jondspen
Melanie, awesome commentary about a real and painful subject for married men and women. I know men who have given up, not having been intimate in years with their spouse. For men it is abuse. Men who choose a wife become, spiritually, emotionally and physically connected to their wife. Many times men will suffer in silence and not violate their oath/vows because of their code of conduct. So some men disconnect and only speak and treat their wife, not as their "bone of their bone and flesh of their flesh" but only as a roommate with a title. Thank you for educating men and women.
A roommate with a title is exactly how I grew to think of my wife.
Hi, Melanie. This is a really great video on the man-woman relationship. 'Friends zone' does not work for men between a man and woman who are married or in any girlfriend-boyfriend relationship. There are technical, spiritual reasons why.
In certain magical teachings it is shared that some of the energetic differences between the sexes are the reasons WHY we are attracted to each other, and how we we each individually get satisfied and want to stay together.
In the man the head area is magnetical (in a higher spiritual sense, not ordinary magnetism). In the woman her head is electrical (in a higher energetic sense). She is pulled to him by his mind, his thoughts and dreams, his poise and mental power.
In the woman her genitals are magnetical (in a higher energetic sense); his are electrical. So she pulls him by her sexuality.
Whenever we each give the other opposite sex partner what he or she needs, all is well; there is balance.
Melanie, just as you wisely echoed the lady in your video, and you are a wise lady, women cannot expect a man to stay happy if she withholds sex, any more than a wise man can expect his woman to be happy if he stops being her family leader, inspirer, provider.
Nature has rules. When we cooperate with those we can be happy.
I’m glad she said three days. I’ve heard of some marriages going three years without sex.
That is true. I've been there before. Never again.
Try 2 to 3 months !
Three years I can do standing on my head.
I've had sex last week. Before that, October or November :)
Before that, some time early summer - I remember because we had a big fight about me talking about me bringing up not having enough intimacy, and she stormed out of the house and started shouting in the backyard so neighbors hear her in order to humiliate me: "I ONLY HAD FOUR ORGASMS EVER SINCE MOVING TO THIS HOUSE!".
Don't get married, guys!
Yeah. 3 days is nothing. 😂
This hits on so many levels for me and my ex. I know that after a while women stop listening, but just because you women (some, not all) stop listening doesn't mean that we are not telling you the truth. For me, being intimate with my ex was to reconnect and help give me purpose. One of the major reasons why suicide rates are disturbingly high in our male community is because we are made to feel like we don't have a purpose and for the ones who do speak on it, we are ignored. As a man, I can say for certain that I don't condone or like stepping out, but this is a need for us as men and women are weaponizing it against us for their reasons. This is a selfish mindset and even if we are forgiven, we are truly not. 😢
Melanie has a lot of wisdom and is exactly what any good and righteous man needs. Keep up the good work, the Lord is watching you and will present your videos to these wicked women on the day of judgement.
Honestly if a woman is withholding physical intimacy from her husband then the first thing that I'm going to think of is she cheating. No one can go without physical intimacy for very long not even women.
If she isn't then she needs to get some therapy herself.
Some women really don't have much, if any sex drive after marriage.
@@txdmskthat’s because they aren’t attracted to thier husbands in the first place they’re just attracted to his Clout and Assets and settled with him
@@NsjsDndjjd
I wish there was any attraction involved. I work like a horse. I'm sure slaves have it better than I do. In turn I earn a ton of money, we live in a nice house, and so on. Wife doesn't give a shit. It is just normal to her.
I can . I’ve been seriously battling no sex , no masterbation , everyday getting rejection by women online an off line . It’s really battling my normal nature . It gives such a bad feeling or hopelessness . I work such a physically demanding life risking job . I look like a fitness model with a great smile . It kills me inside that I simple just want to be adored
@@Cov930 Focus on your yourself forget women . Women do not adore men , it's not in their nature.
Great video. I ended a relationship over her not giving me sex every time we had a disagreement. It's emotional and physical blackmail and I won't tolerate it.
The fact you word it as “not giving me sex” just shows how selfish you are and that you only care about your needs being met and not about solving the problem at hand with love and care and communication
The therapist speaking should have been giving a big shout out and social media info! She was spot on! Kaptaivating Konversations is her RUclips channel. Support her! 👏🏽👏🏽
Intimacy is important to me. At the same time I don't want my partner to be resentful towards my need. There may be more to the story, exhausted, overworked, in pain, upset about something. When I feel that way, intimacy (not sex specifically) can help me shed some of that weight, at least for a little while. I'm always hopeful for it.
Stop the bullshit, one time situation where someone is feeling bad is not the topic and you know it. Women use excuses like that all the time because contesting their BS puts you in a bad light whereas admitting that they ration sex for control would do the opposite.
You spend time and energy on the things you value. When you keep saying that you are too tired because of all these other things, the message that is inherent is that he is less important than your job, your friends, the laundry, scrolling on insta, and all of the things you do. Many women think that "I'm too tired" is a good reason, but in reality it's the most insulting and devaluing thing you can say.
I told all my ex-girlfriends and ex-wife the same thing a therapist told me once 10 years ago. "Even a good excuse is still an excuse." Did they ever take heed? Definitely not!
Half of all men work in manual labor jobs...construction, roofing, plumbers, brick layers, electricians, trucking, landscaping, etc........"I'm too tired!".....from what??........Sitting at your desk all day in air conditioning? Pushing the "start" button on the washer? In 2024, very few women, in the USA, are "tired". Stop the madness.
@@Eaglejake Exactly! Try being a solar electrician in all the elements plus the average of hour and a half job commutes daily. WOMEN: " But but?...I have mental stress and PTSD from work!" Yeah cause you're a bird brain!
@@EaglejakeExactly. My dad worked as a roofer for two decades and later as a supervisor for fifteen. That shit is insane. 165 degrees in the summer between ambient and the molten tar. But the guys still showed up every day.
@@Eaglejake FACTS!!!
This woman is a saint. THANK YOU for saying this !
I feel you! My wife has treated me horribly in this manner for years and sometimes long ago ignored me in conversations for weeks. I actually had to create a brand new argument many times just to get her to show her madness just to talk. This last year after 35 years of marriage, I just gave up. Something has happened to me where I just don’t really love her anymore. I act like it, but my feelings have left and don’t want to tell her because I still don’t want to hurt her. So I will die an old man lonely inside and be free. I believe women cause so much pain and unnecessary drama what a beautiful world it could be if they would just listen, open their arms, eyes and see how many of us would die for them.
Your first 2 lines is me, without bringing stuff like that up, there is no conversation. How terrible
All this truth spitting has me sprung! So nice to hear this from women. Amazing the feelings that are produced in a man when hearing this.
Most pets get more unconditional love and affection from women then their men do.
Time to go tit fo tat.
Just leave
women have to be sanctioned. no money, no attention and divestment from women. that should crush the feminist economy. in turn we will see further civil strife and unrest. the goal being a non progressive patriarchal revolution.
Because pets give unconditional love, unlike men. I have never known a man that loves unconditionally, unless it's my daddy or grandpa.
@@melindaroop1346 No pet gives unconditional love. You have to first earn its trust and when you want to be the pack leader also its respect.
@@skaterboi65 I was talking in general, not so much about myself. But it's true that over the years I had this experience and also witnessed it in the relationships of different friends and couples I knew.
And this is why some men want to get straight to the sex because it can be a form of Communication, just because you got married , it doesn't mean you stop "dating"
When you love your wife and she shows you love in this way it just makes you want to hug her so tight, caress her hair and tell all the best things in your heart.
I appreciate you ladies being fr with this. This issue is 💯 precursor to stepping out or bitterness.
Be like your man saying I’m tired of providing so I’m not going to anymore.
Issue 2. Y’all get comfy with this, your health, your weight.
When she cuts you off from sex, transfer all of your money into an account she can't touch, and keep it there. That's where it lives now and forever. Make the money as rare as the sex.
"Yes, it's no longer love. It's a transaction. You did that. You won. This is how it is now. You want a bill paid? You need a chore done? Why should I? Tell me that's my job. I dare you."
Facts bc it is her duty to give sex like its my duty to do everything else but that's all we ask them to do which is crazy
I like that.
I do that all the time when a chick tries withholding sex. I withhold sex and get tired paying for it and bounce.
Die vorce enters the chat😂
🥶🥶🥶
Married 20 years without a divorce. In any marriage there will be plenty of challenges and sex will fluctuate. Address the issues as they come up. But if she tells you your sex life is over? The marriage is OVER. Leave. She no longer has any regard for you.
I work out all my life because it’s essential and I have been in my job field for 30 years and I make over $100,000. Women confront me all the time but I want to laugh or loose my stomach. I can’t imagine having one of these in my house again
This was your best video ever. You're quite the truth-teller Mel. You are doing more for couples than any thousand therapists. Right on!!!
When I wake up at 3:30 am I make my own breakfast pack my own lunch and clean up my mess. I have never ever had a woman make me breakfast or pack my lunch. I went to someone’s house last week the lady friend of my wife made me lunch I didn’t ask for and made me a drink I was working on her back fence. If I work around the yard or working on the cars change the oil repair them I have to fend for myself and wash my own cloths. She won’t make my side of the bed she will leave it. So I have to make it before I leave. My dog sits next to me when I come home my wife won’t zero intimacy, not even a butt grab
It's been 5 years now since my divorce because my ex wife wanted a divorce. That last year of my marriage was a nightmare. She would withhold intimacy for weeks and even months. Two months after we divorced, I found out she had cheated on me with a coworker at the hospital she works at.
The medical field is known for having one of the highest cheating rates when it come to their personal relationships. My guess it has something to do with it's where a lot of "high status" men are.
@@bgrimlan Absolutely, 100%. The worst thing is she didn't even need to work because she had it all. I bought our home, our vehicle, took her on trips and the list goes on. A lot of women are simply ungrateful, deceitful, manipulative and selfish.
Immediately you said hospital 🏥 wasn't surprised, mehhnn 😂😂😂 i have too many promiscuous stories happening at hospitals sad but true. People mess around way too in there! Sorry man you didn't deserve any of that AT ALL!!!
@@scotthearts9634 thanks man. Yeah it's something you don't wish on anyone but that was my 1st and last time I get in a relationship with someone who works at a hospital.
Yeppery
In a divorce now
She up and told me some excuse about a casual comment I had made several months before
Nope ....... No more sex
Went from very Hot to very Not in just a couple of months
Last year and half I got nothing at all
Yes, she is a nurse
HHHMMM!?!?!?!?
Anyway I was told that she probably found someone new
I have learned in life that anything major that happens against me, I usually find out without a whole lot of work or investigating
So I am just gonna sit back and wait and see
Might take a year but I don't care
About 15 years ago, similar circumstances happened
Took about 6 months to hear and find out all the minute details
😮😮😮😂😂😂
My attitude has always been as soon as a woman says she "let me do X" I'm out. At the time it happens it may be (should be) mutual. But the moment she starts remembering it as "I let him", it's over. You didn't let me, any more than I let you. They may be the gatekeepers, but this creative memory alteration for personal gain has got to stop. 🙄
This is beyond accurate. They use clever wording to subconsciously establish that power dynamic. They present it like its a gift and a favor she "lets" you enjoy. I always hated that, acting like we are both not benefitting.
@@pablinkz A lot of women are not benefiting from it because the men are lame in bed. I grew up in church where they taught us that sex is only for men’s pleasure and not women’s. They treated women with sexual needs and expectations like they were evil and defective. This was deliberately done to justify a husband being lazy and selfish in bed, easy sex for men, no need for women to finish. Yet, every perversion was a “need” for men. Every fantasy of the husband was a “need” and not just a want. Women who spoke up about their needs were called jezebels.
@@pablinkzWell said 🫡
That part
So nice to hear that it’s a form of communication & makes him feel good.
These videos speak the truth, however they rarely reach the female audience to effectively get the message across.
On the other hand, letting men know this is not okay and she doesn’t have the right to emotionally abuse you, is a worthy cause all on its own.
Unfortunately, some not all women who do this are not going to say you are right, but some will. It's like when a person went to jail then they get out and apply for a job, then the application says "Have you ever been convicted of a crime?" Some women or men, don't want to be told what they did or doing wrong. If people would just swallow there pride " No pun intended lol" people would be more at ease if they just spoke the truth. Simply say, you need to do this to get me to do that and even then, there is omission. If people followed rules for who the rules pertains, their would be less cheating, less waste of time and less divorces. Man, thank you for putting this video together as it seems this is a serious problem and topic that should be discussed more and not be afraid of the tongue lashing from everyone. What ever happened to reading your Bible 1 Corinthians 13 4-8? Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it does not dishonor others, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps record of no wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails....please ladies and gentlemen, if you want to keep your partner, learn your roles as a partner before committing to someone. Mic dropped 🎤🫳 lol😅
I’m divorced and I have a hard time believing in marriage for myself because I fear getting into a situation in which a woman will use my need for sex as a weapon or just fail to understand how important it is to me. Listening to this woman makes me want to believe in marriage again and I wasn’t even sure if that was possible anymore
Yeah. Melanie sounds and looks to good to be true.