When Your Girlfriend Wants Marriage & Kids
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- Опубликовано: 12 сен 2024
- What does a man do when his girlfriend wants to get married, and have kids, but you aren't keen on the idea. Todays request comes from a viewer in California, that's starting to feel pressure from his girlfriend to have kids.
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'When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.' - Maya Angelou
Why do so many men want to have kids? A father's primary role is that of provider. Why would I want to work more hours and more years, and spend my free time watching cartoons and shuttling to soccer practice, just to have them grow up and take off and see them twice a year? I don't really see what's in it for me.
Hey Coop. When I lived in Las Vegas, I consulted a lawyer who heads a group called Equal Rights For Divorced Fathers. My suggestion is that you have Ernest Del Casal on. Worth it!
You know the drill guys:
Marriage has 3 rings:
The engagement ring
The wedding ring
And the suffering
Maybe you want to get a perspective that serves you better....
My experience being married then divorcing while having a child in California:
After 3 years of marriage my wife cheated on me and we split. The judge gave her sole physical custody of our child and I got visitations and a monthly child support bill, even though I didn't have a job at the time. The judge said "you've got 30 days to find a job and start paying support". So that's what I did. Then, when our kid turned 16 I ended up getting custody. This time my ex wasn't working. I asked about child support and the judge said "she's not working, so I'm not ordering her to pay support". Hahaha, okay judge, that seems fair... (－‸ლ)
That makes my blood boil.
Dang. Makes me wanna turn around
My advice: If there's ANY wince of doubt at all in the guy's mind about marriage and kids....listen to your gut. Do not get married and do not have kids.
Why do so many men want kids? A father's primary role is that of provider. Why would I want to work more hours and more years, and spend my free time watching cartoons and shuttling to soccer practice, just to have them grow up and take off. I don't really see what's in it for me.
Great, then don’t
Life as a father is the best thing!
You forgot to mention one thing. He may tell her he doesn't want a kid but it doesn't stop her "forgetting" to take her birth control. Walk that tightrope if you will my friend.
That's why you always pull out no matter what. My girl says she's on bc, but I pull out all the time.
yeah, she will forget or, the milk man will get the job done and he will take care of the little milk bottle.
If she forget birth control, forget Plan B in her morning orange juice
Stop wasting her time. Let her move on to find a bloke who wants to have children with her.
@@TheBananamonger how’d it go?
Exactly 👍
You can’t have everything but you can have anything. Most Women, Most; Want Everything. Which is Unrealistic. The kids, the house, the happiest family, the status, the mini van.. etc.. I’ll just sip my OJ and play GTA.
@@RodriguezEnterprise Seize the day! 😀
In 1992, I met my girlfriend. We lived in Marin County, CA, just north of San Francisco. She wanted marriage. At the time, I thought I wanted to get married to her. However, shortly after we announced our engagement, she told me she wanted between 12-15 kids! She was serious! I said no thanks and ended our engagement. Since then, while I have had several LTR's with women, I have never been married, and have no children. I have been very happy being single.
Meanwhile, my ex-fiance' had a least six kids. She married her former volleyball coach. The last time I saw her, she was working on number seven. However, I found out, she got divorced, and is/was on several dating sites!
What the actual fuck 😂😂
A video on Bezos divorce would be interesting.
Nick I did a video on my channel, you should go check it out.
A video on why Bezos would take on the liability of a head case with 4 kids by 3 dad's who is way over the hill would also be interesting
Nick look for the video on the Bezos divorce by Terrence Popp from redonkulas
@@erictortosa4002 thank you edit: man really thanks for the suggestion, this dude rocks
Nope
if a woman wants something remember it only benefits herself!
It's interesting that she says "when I have kids of my own", not "when we have kids...", would it be conceivable that she doesn't see you as the father of her children.
If so, the problem fixes itself, your LTR ends and you can walk off into the sunset with your assets intact.
Bingo
Yup in their narcissism it's always their kid and they only use a man to get what they want. Give them nothing
When I lived in California I dated two women with Master degrees and they said the same thing. In their mind I was just a pay check no love. So I walked away. All the way to another state. 😂
Never thought of it that way, classic Freudian slip..she's telling the world she'll use that kid as a pawn in divorce court. Good call.
True...good point but maybe she doesnt want to throw that hint so directly.
I Just had that conversation with my girlfriend two days ago.
I told her that I don’t want to get married, have kids or live with a woman.
She got upset and said that she needs that to feel that I have commitment in the relationship, and she wanted to sleep with me every night.
which I reply saying that we don’t need the state involved to have a good relationship and living together is going to affect the relationship by adding monetary challenges and even if get married we're not gonna sleep together every night due to my job as a firefighter.
She’s good to me but I know my cutie pie has the potential in changing once married (like any other girl)
Dude you are using her until her bio clock forces her to find another guy or attempt to trap you by getting pregnant. You and her are not on the same page. Both of you need to move on. What you do have will not end well, but it will end, and it could end badly for you.
Just keep in mind (as you already know), your profession has some of the highest-rates of divorce and misery. I'm in the healthcare industry, and see it all over with nurses, paramedics, and police officers. You're wise to not get married, but made the mistake of letting her know your fears of The State (which is true), but now she knows your weakness and may use it against you sometime in the future. This kind of knowledge is best shared between men, and doesn't suit you (at all) to inform your significant other.
As Rich has said before, humans are masters of two things: complicating the shit out of their lives and then justifying why they do it. If you aren't on the same page you're just wasting eachother's time and energy. You can find women who will be on board with your way of living, and she can find a man that'll give her what she wants. Just move on.
Bash Trifun. You are a thief and a coward. Cut her loose and find a hooker or another man. You have no moral right to waste other people's time with your selfishness. There are good men somewhere. Let her find one.
@@harorider96 being red pill means that I'm aware of women's nature... whatever I decide to do with that knowledge is my decision.
I'm not making her stay with me.. I'm letting her know what to expect from me (which I shouldn't do but I'm still "nice" to do so)
She also knows that I have other plates, eventhough she doesn't like it still sticks with me.. that means for her I have 1 to 2 SMV points above her and she recognizes it.
"Women prefer to share a successful Alpha rather than be with a faithful loser"
Stay Reppill my friend!
What does a man do when his girlfriend wants to get married, and have kids? Run to the hills, run for your life...
She wants kids, you don't and her fertility window is almost closed. What's left to discuss...and a word of caution...those maternal cravings can make good women do bad things. I've had more than one friend get sperm-jacked. I've even had one who had a vasectomy that had two different women do the "I'm pregnant" thing at the twilight of their relationship.
another CO guy here....One of the RMG's (or DDJ, or TFM) I think told a story about a guy suggesting putting horseradish into the used condom to find out just how dangerous the woman is . Then one gut actually got charged with assault for doing so. FFS, assault for preventing a cum-dumpster-diver?
I'm pretty sure the guy who put the horseradish (or was it tabasco) was exonerated, as the judge ruled the used condom as solely his property to do with as he pleased.
@@dgaunn4114 What the hell is wrong with people? A man not only believes it necessary (and it obviously was) to put hot sauce in a rubber, but also needs a judge to keep him out of jail for it?
Good God, we're so fucking doomed.
@@TheRealCaptainJamesTKirk and your comment is from a year ago. It's only gotten worse with this bullshit.
I survived from my divorce in CA.
Hitman?
Ended a relationship of 8 years only because she wanted kids and marriage but I did not. Best decision ever…
My ex-gf after 18 months gave me an ultimatum about kids. She made me feel like I meant nothing to her when she did that. Obviously the relationship with me wasn't as important as having kids. I told her early on before we got serious that I was unsure about kids because I had gone through some traumatic events that had shaped me to thinking that way. Thing is that I would totally have kids but only with someone that truly loves me more than having kids. If a girl will throw you to the side if you won't have kids with her, then this goes to show you exactly what she would do if you actually did have kids with her. I would've had kids with my ex if she would have told me that she would sacrifice not having kids for me, for me this would go to show me that she truly loves and values me.
Lance Reed meh. I disagree. It’s fine if you are on the fence about kids, don’t want them, or you just aren’t ready yet. Women have half the time to have children than men do. I don’t think anyone should make ultimatums but a woman who deeply desires children and decides to dismiss it for the sake of a man, will end up depressed, damaged, and resentful in her later years. Let her find someone to give her what she wants, there are plenty of women who don’t desire children.
@@crystaloats8177 well like I said I would only have kids with someone that truly loved me and would do anything to be with me. I value a life partner more than kids. See women don't love men the way men love women. You guys are totally fine with replacing us with another man in a heart beat if we don't fit your agenda. Men don't do this, we make life sacrifices all the time for the women we love. This is why women only care about themselves and not their partners and this is why 70 % of divorces are initiated by women. Btw she was 22 when she gave me that ultimatum not 30 something. Let me ask you this what if down the road she finds out that she can't have kids at all due to some complication. I bet she will want her boyfriend or husband at the time to stay with her even though she can't have kids!!
@@lance_1612 women are selfish bro, they don't care as men do.
t k after 36 years of life on this earth and 4 LTR’s I’ve finally realized this. The modern woman is selfish, unloving, uncaring, not committed, egotistical, attention addicts, hypocrite, and will stab you in the back in the blink of an eye! I grew up with two parents that hated each other. My mother was absolutely horrible to my dad and I refuse to let that happen to me and potentially my kids. I truly feel like things have changed so much that there is no need for men to commit to women anymore, long term that is.
Lance Reed I wish that were true. Men and women love differently, but we certainly love men. I’ve been in love three times, the last time I’d totally embraced and become knowledgeable about proper male and female roles, and submission. I read the book “Fascinating Womanhood” which changed my life and my behavior in relationships. It made dealing with men stress free, easy, and wonderful. Unfortunately being a totally submissive woman who values her man and loves him for he is has its downsides. I truly truly loved my last partner but he began to cheat on me and I was devastated. I ignored it at first, thought it was just a midlife crisis thing, maybe he was just a bit bored. It is a pain unimaginable, and I’ve been cheated on and it hurt but wasn’t devastating. Because I wasn’t in love, I was able to just get over it and move on. But when I fully love and give a man my submission it’s amazing. So fulfilling. But it’s traumatic if he takes advantage of it. Women are afraid to submit, society doesn’t want us to trust each other.
I believe there are loyal great men but a lot of men do not appreciate submissive women and take advantage of them.
If you are a leader, understand women, you won’t have much to worry about.
Trust me women do see the children as theirs , you provided the seed , and now your only role is to provide the resources however as we all know she no longer needs to live with you to have the benefit of your resources
How is Wilma these days?
Why do so many men want kids? A father's primary role is that of provider. Why would I want to work more hours and more years, and spend my free time watching cartoons and shuttling to soccer practice, just to have them grow up and take off and visit twice a year? I don't really see what's in it for me.
@@blurglide Exactly, sometimes they grow up ungrateful kids or trouble kids. You never know what's going to happen in the future with them. However, I understand the reason of wanting kids, to see your seed became a person and the hope your kid will watch over you when you become older etc... Unfortunately that's not guaranteed as the majority of people don't wanna watch over the father or mother when they're old, so they send them to a retirement home
@@blurglide I believe it's about passing along their generation
And honestly to make something about you and them proves you don't want to be a father at all and that's alright, but if that's the case, you got to be responsible in the sex you do, cause it takes two to tango, wear protection, if she is not taking birth control or has a stick in her arm, someone needs to be responsible in that action
In my opinion, if a woman has the strength to make it on her own, hold herself well, support herself and responsible for her crap, she might accept the seed but brush you off knowing you don't want to be there
I think in that kind of mindset, you can have all the pussy you want, have your life but she will definitely protect hers and have every right to not let a father be there if he doesn't want to be there. That kind of attitude and behaviour will only hurt the growing child, into being insecure as an adult wondering why his or her didn't love them, its because the mother is willing to replace the father on all ends of the spectrum
The slut dad can have his life, and the mother who wants to be a mother can have hers
I know most relationships aren't like this, but some are and sometimes it's the other way around where the mom left because of mom and the child had nothing to do with it
There is more than an individual's wants in a relationship, if a child is born, are you going to be a good parent and love that child cause if not, GTFO of their life so someone can love them for exactly what they deserve, fuckin happiness
Long time watcher but never commented. 5 days ago I left a 12 year relationship and marriage due to her wanting kids. I never have wanted them, am 38, and still don’t want kids. I was heartbreaking and became a wide mismatch between us, and now I’m divorced and starting my life over at 38. Have a 10x10 small storage shack with all my belongings and looking for a house. The amount of guilt, pain and stress is unreal. I’m not usually emotional, but this has screwed me up, but my logical side told me it was the right choice. Days after, I think the decision was the right one, and truly hope she has children and the family with a man who wants that. I have already started planning my new life and have hope. Have a killer new job that makes insane amounts of money and benefits, new lease on life and a fresh start. I have zero interest in getting married or having kids at this point, and finding women who respect both those things seems like a unicorn hunt. But in a city of 7.5 million, I think I’ll have someone out there who can agree to those terms and not be crazy in the head. If not, i have a million hobbies to keep me occupied.
In short, don’t settle. It fucks up both people mentally and physically. Worst pain I’ve felt. Never again.
Good luck my dude really good job at keeping what you believed in that's 100x more inspirational than giving up on your own values. Most guys do that including me in the past but hey it's a learning experience.
Thanks for the support. I’ll be honest, it feels shitty leaving behind a friend. She was a good person but I saw the writing on the wall and knew in 3-5 years, there would be a lot of resentment for one of us depending on who buckled on their life wants. Just didn’t want to be miserable 20 years in, and I’m still young enough to find someone who fits.
I haven’t watched all the videos or read the books, but I intend to now. I have never really agreed with the idea of marriage, as I’m not religious and know the back history to the tradition of betting someone half your stuff you will love them forever.
Nobody likes starting over or being alone. But reading the comments and watching these videos...I don’t feel as alone as before. Seriously, I am glad this channel exists. It does help, and maybe I can return the favor one day.
@@Mad0Killah I did pretty much the same thing. She got remarried and had kids a couple years later, which is good. Why do so many men want kids? A father's primary role is that of provider. Why would I want to work more hours and more years, and spend my free time watching cartoons and shuttling to soccer practice, just to have them grow up and take off and visit twice a year? I don't really see what's in it for me.
@@thomasnunn6343 and you shouldn't feel alone brother. At the end of the day it's the best choice and I know at times you'll probably question what you did. It's difficult sometimes because I don't know all the details and factors that keeps your attachment to her you know? I mean for me I put my ex in a pedestal and thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world. I neglected her bad behaviors and red flags. She was a single mom of two from two different dads. The second born happened because the dad cheated on her and got another girl pregnant so to spite the woman, he got pregnant by the same guy who cheated on her. There's just a better place for you man just gotta be patient and enjoy the ride.
@@blurglide Hey man that's a great perspective. I really wished I had those realization early in my years. Still I'm young and don't have kids yet but I still kind of want them one day but not right now.
I got into a situation dating a single mom and I basically took over the role of being the dad and it was hard because that's the only time in my life that I felt like the family wasn't complete (I felt incomplete) until I had my own child with her but having two kids from two different dads and her knowing she's not good with relationships, she couldn't deal with me wanting my own kids with her. So she broke up with me. Now I don't know if we'd still be together if I said I didn't want kids anymore but I felt like having kids one day was something I valued and I wasn't going to let her destroy that. But anyways I'm glad I learned from that experience. I'm with a girlfriend (no kids) and I really enjoy just focusing on myself and not taking care of kids.
I've been happily married for 15 years. All my divorced in less time friends married men who were reluctant to get marry and/or have kids. I don't get it, if my now husband was reluctant about marriage or kids we wouldn't have done either. He casually mentioned it one day, "What do you think about getting married and having kids?" And we talked about it for awhile.
If you don't want to get married or have kids don't do it, no woman is worth compromising your own personal wants and life goals.
Went through a similar ordeal. Basically you and she want different things out of life. Keep it simple for yourself and break it off calmly with her without dragging things out. Her time is limited and she’ll appreciate you for it.
Good friend of mine just got DECIMATED in family court. Basically just retired from a 24 year career and now has to get another job. It was so sad to see.
If she wants kids and you don't you should have that conversation with her. Let her move on if that is her priority. If she decides to stay you may want to consider a vasectomy to prevent any "surprises" from popping into your life. And keep the paperwork, preferably in a safety deposit box. . .
This is the best advice on here.
I live in Southern California, & you are spot-on with the system being rough on fathers
fight back
hr 777 don’t have to, never been married and never want to. I’ve seen it happen to friends who are fathers though...
I don’t know anyone that hasn’t been divorced in California. (At least of the friends I grew up with). The friends I thought had the most stable marriages got divorced after the kids moved out, of course the ladies got the house and most of the assets. Many guys starting over in their 40’s and 50’s.
You say you don't want marriage or kids. If she disagrees the relationship is over. Marriage or kids is game over for men in modern American society thanks to how f'd up the family courts are. It's too big of a risk.
Why do so many men want that? A father's primary role is that of provider. Why would I want to work more hours and more years, and spend me free time watching cartoons and shuttling to soccer practice, just to have them grow up and take off. I don't really see what's in it for me.
i think having children is a reward for men and women. we tend to talk about children as if they are this giant burden. ya your life would be more difficult with children but imo the reward of having your own offspring to love and love you back seems great. fuck the law fuck what culture says. nature always wins. and men naturally want to spread the seed.
James Blyth yeah Spread your seed on that 250k in child support payments. I’m good
ya im not in states so luckily that bs don't apply to me
I bet you the reason why so many kids commit suicide is because the family court always favor abusive parents!
3:18 that quote simply means: ''someday when i have children from either you or someone else''. Aka, she is going to have children regardless of whether you want it or not. If you're not willing to have children with her, she'll go and make it happen some other way. Either 'accidentally' getting knocked up by you, or get it from some other dude. Also, don't tell her you don't want it ''at this time'' 8:55. That's just leading her on and you don't want to do that with a 31 year old woman who has only a couple more years left to get pregnant.
I agree. Do not lead her on. Us guys hate it when women lead us on...be a man and tell it to her straight.
Move on ... you want no kids or marriage ... game over.! Been there . Left every time immediately
She wants kids, he doesn't. That's a dealbreaker, get out while you can my man.
Wow it's sad that a woman that wants to be a mother is seen in such bad light. I understand and I do agree that many are witches...but the simple fact of wanting children so natural.
Many? AWALT. Women suck the soul out of men. Pointing out this fact is called misogyny these days. This civilization WILL fall in next 100-200 years.
My main suggestion is for this gentleman to get a vasectomy and let her know that. And if she stays with him then great if not then they both get to move on to find their true happiness
I went through the same situation. Neither of us would budge, so I ended our six year relationship.
How do you get into a relationship with someone who wants kids and marriage and you don't? I find a way to bring this up very soon. Subtle but known. I've never attracted a man that doesn't want those things so that's good.
You're best chances of attracting a man of high value is you're willingness to abandon all the feminist programming and be willing to be submissive. Won't work with a beta, they'd just be confused. Try to present value beyond jut sex, because sex is cheap and readily available for free. Be feminine, fit, cook, devoid of psychological issues. Be wealthy already ;). It's harsh to most women, but consider the looooong list of criteria women have for men: 6'+ height, 100k+, 6k ft^2 house, 6pack, 600 hp car, 6'+ cock, hair, hot, high social status, on and on....statistically the .05% (or less) of men out there.
If she decides to break up with him that doesn’t mean she didn’t love him. It’s okay to not prioritize your partner in this kind of decisions, specially when she being fertile is limit by time.
Yep, as a guy who doesn't want kids...it's not right to be in a relationship with a woman that I know wants kids.
That's true, but what is important is how she worded it, which in this case is a red flag.
@@mckricks1 I agree there. The biggest red flag for this guy though is she wants kids and he doesn't. Relationship over. It's a no brainer.
That's one of the reasons why Richard preaches self-reliant entrepreneurship, so that when a dude comes to a point of building a family, he has resources and opportunity to do it in a safer environment.
“Apparently haven’t done this topic before...”. Nice ;)
Awesome how you don't judge the guy for not wanting kids. Most people berate and interrogate me for not wanting a family. As if it's my duty and responsibility.
Says he hasn't seen any red flags, proceeds to say she's *32* and that she mentioned in passing *"Someday when I have children of my own,"* The mere fact you read all of those books should have given you the balls to say, up front, "By the way, I don't want marriage or children.", preferably in a public place, but definitely *not* in your home.
If a woman finds a hypergamous suitable male, or she finds any male if her SMV is low, can let these things slide in the beginning of the LTR. She can lie to say she doesn't want children either. What she's saying is "I don't want children... yet" or "I cannot let this suitable male get away, I'll play along that I don't want children... then when things get more serious between us, maybe he'll change his mind". She will use all tactics on a man if so necessary, even plying ball with him to do so and hope he falls in love. Just be aware.
@@rtyrtyrtyus I think the man should still have this conversation early in the relationship so as not to waste the time of either party
don't worrry she'll make the decision 4 you
I haven't missed a pill !!! Honest !!!!!
Face it, when a woman has your kid and marriage contract, she has you. When she is done with you, she still has your money and possessions thanks to that contract you entered into. How many times to men have to see it to realize that marriage is a horrible deal for them? How many more good men must suffer?
Someday when I have children of my own. Says it all. They will be her children, not his. He becomes the sperm donor and financial support for her and her children. If she spoke about our children instead, that becomes a little better. But if you don't want children, don't have them. Children deserve 2 committed parents and at least 20 years. Time to move on.
Best approach is straight communication. Always
Dude, vasectomy. Now. I really must go and nag my Dr into letting me get one. If you don't want marriage, if you don't want kids tell her now. I told my best girl when we met, you're never moving in, we're never getting married and I don't ever want kids. Thirteen years later we're still together under those terms. Don't let her trick you into giving her a belly-full of arms and legs. Having a child nowadays is not a prudent investment for men and should be avoided at all costs.
If she wants kids and you don't, you're wasting her time! Stop it! Let her find someone to build a family unit with. The unit that used to be the foundation of our society
Here comes philosopher Jesus Christ. Who gives a crap about society?
Problem is no matter how chilled she seems you just do not know if she’ll turn into a nightmare, have a sexless marriage etc after marriage and kids etc and play god with the kids. There is no woman that is 100% rust free...Everyone of them has the capability to destroy your life
Hey i use tactical soap while its not the end all be all. You still have to work on yourself but its an edge on the market place. And i love the channel
Then: I had 2 Son's and took a 65%+ financial hit from their mother when we split... Now: My Boy's are now 23 and 28, the ROI having these two in business with me has made the the initial 65%+ hit insignificant... Then there is the quality of life side that my Sons add to the equation which exceeds anything that money could buy... I'm sad for those guys that that don't have kids and miss out on the rewards that offspring brings to the table...
That's your experience and your experience alone. Children just like marriage are choices there's not a right or wrong answer, it's what works for you when it works for you. There are plenty of people who regret having children but our society does not allow that narrative at all. Go type in "I hate" in Google and I" hate being a parent" pops up in the results. Glad it worked out for you.
My advice: Be real careful about birth control. She wants kids...
If the guy does not want to get married and have children, he needs to leave the woman NOW. ESPECIALLY if she has a solid relationship with her strong masculine father. Ltr = stringing her along in daddy’s eyes, the dad will see what you’re doing, just avoid it and break it off. She sounds like a winner and another man who wants the same will snap her up. It’s ok to just want your career, just do the right thing and break up.
he should have let her go as soon as he knew he didnt wanted kids....that is important to her... you are wasting her time..
She knew he didnt want kids and stayed so she was wasting her own time. She could have left as well.
Let her go and give her the opportunity to find someone who will meet her needs.
Alongside your readings, a MUST WATCH: Divorce Corp. You're welcome, Gentlemen.
For the writer:
"SOMEDAY when I have children of my own.." She is 32!!! When the hell is SOMEDAY?!?!? She will get pregnant!!!! With your consent or not!!!
If you don't want kids, I strongly suggest getting a vasectomy (especially if you are not into condoms). Don't let her decide on this!
Marriage is soul crushing hellscape of life long misery. Advice to any male facing this scam. Run, move house, change your number and never look back.
Yes, and she also wants everything you have....she just doesn't want you. Don't do it.
I certainly want many kids, but in my opinion you need to be the best you can be before you go down that road. Quality attracts quality, as for marriage I think that is a little to dangerous in current times, but a "pretend" ceremony of some kind is fine in my books.
Thanks Rich, just the video I need in the timely manner (my girl has dropped less than subtle hints and we - the guy in the email and myself - have similar views). Great content and thank you.
Instead of getting married you can save your money every month if you have a decent career. You can even retire early if you plan things correctly. Heck, just by saving and investing in housing you can have financial freedom, early retirement and a decent pension to live on... Marriage is just a waste...
You are entering a battle.
There is a 70% chance that you will loose. There is a 30% chance that it will boil down to a stalemate. 0% of victory for a man.
Its absolutely mind boggling that men are still entering the battle field with those odds
Dude you kinda remind me of the wizard from runescape. But that's neither here nor there another great video.
lmfao
I find some people trick themselves into forcing things to work, specifically women. They’ll pretend they’re happy until it’s too late. As a woman I saw my female friends treat men who weren’t bad, like shitty abusers and even saw my friend become sadistic and awful to her loving boyfriend and he was falling to pieces. I dumped my ex friend when I learned she was toying with my brother. Not enough people are truly oriented in a good direction. I started watching when I was writing a paper for school and realized a lot of things I hadn’t before. It seems like everyone is constantly sizing each other up and seeing what they can get from you.
I know someone in this position and she always knew that he had "the snip" before they met.
This seems pretty straight forward. At 32 she's most likely entered the epiphany phase and is looking for the long term beta provider. Given this guy is 31 he'll soon be reaching his SMV peak and will be spoiled for choice on women provided he maintains his physique and focuses on himself. He already made it clear to us he doesn't want marriage or kids so I'd say let someone else take the role of being the beta provider especially since he'll soon be hitting his stride. Don't let the scarcity mindset control you.
V C agree confused on this one. It’s not beta if it’s your own kids but I do agree that he should end it immediately so she can move on. She is too old for him and he should be with younger women.
In this situation right now... I have been with her for 6 years, and I had almost ended the relationship 2 years ago due to the fact that i wasent ready at all to get married, buy a house and have kids... and now shes starting to act all pissed again acting like she dosent know what shes doing with me if i dont want those things... A part of me wants those things and shes a great girl... but I also feel as if I havent lived my life yet and im drawn to things like traveling for extended periods of time... especially after what the state of the world has become in he past few years, i'm not sure i would want to bring kids into this... but yet again, i'm a prisoner in Canada right now and lost my job and cant take any plane, boat or train because of my vaccine status... so not sure what to do... might be stranded here for years...
his girl is 32, not good tp waste her time as she is running out, if she wants kids.
Leaving him doesn’t mean she doesn’t value the relationship or him. If kids and marriage is important to her- leaving the relationship is actually the smart thing to do. To say what you Said about her would be equal to her saying “If you valued me, you would prioritize me and this relationship and give me what I want. “ If she wants a family- she should leave and be with a man who desires the same .
*1 Corinthians **7:38* (NIV)
³⁸So then, he who marries the virgin does right, but he who does not marry her does better.
People who cite 50% divorce rate forget to mention that a significant chunk of those divorces include people who marry for 2nd or 3rd time. If it's a first marriage for both of you odds are better. It is still a shit deal but I am advocating for precision and nuance.
But wasn't the divorce rate of 2nd and 3rd marriages like 70-80%?
I got married in Chicago (very anti father) and got divorced in Las Vegas (much better place to get divorced for men) and my divorce (which I initiated) was a cinch. $400 tops. I used a paralegal for the paperwork. I had to trick her into signing it.
lol
Its crazier than that. I am a reproductive health care physician. I am always amused how pregnant women come in and say "We are pregnant"(with my child), and not" I am pregnant with our child". The reason for this is simple. We are pregnant so if I gain too much weight it must be because we are eating too much. If there is a pregnancy related problem its not me, its us.Its a mechanism to shift blame from herself if something goes wrong. Of course if it all goes well as is mostly the case it results in "my child". This is becoming the norm, not just for single mothers. The pendulum has truly swung from years gone by when all pregnancy related and resultant problems were seen as being the mothers fault(incorrectly).
Wow. You are exactly the kind of misogynist that every woman wants to have as her doctor. Of course "reproductive health care physician" can also mean ABORTIONIST. Yep. That fits you.
I'm a little perplexed as to why red pill men are so against having babies. Isn't that the most manly and virile thing a man can do on this earth?...to plant his seed within the fertile womb of the woman he loves and create a human life? There's so much power in that. Why avoid it?
I can't tell if this is sarcasm or not? If not; because legally and socially the game is rigged in favor of women. There are very tangible reasons why men should be extremely cautious. And it's my observation that getting chewed up by the divorce machine, financially chained to a women for life and isolated from your children is a very emasculating experience.
18years x 12months = 216 Monthly Child Support Payments
Payment is 25% of your income - assuming a low salary of $30000 = $625
216 x Monthly payments of $625 = $135000
Obviously the amount scale up as you earn more, Kirk Kerkorian paid $100,000/month in Child Support (not alimony) for one daughter ($21.6 million)
It doesn't have to be that way though. I promise you it doesn't. I agree that men need to be EXTREMELY selective and careful when picking a girlfriend/wife/mother of their children, but when you find a quality woman who TRULY loves you, please don't be so jaded and disgruntled that you lose it. When it's real, it's magic.
There are still good women out there. I love my man so incredibly much. Sometimes I cry when I think about how in love with him I am and how much respect I have for him. I want to take care of him in every way a woman can take care of a man. And I cannot wait for the day when his baby is growing inside of me because it will be an extension of this man that I adore, and the greatest expression of our love.
@@opaloakley -- You are what we call a "unicorn". Because, although we hear about them, we have never actually seen one. We keep hearing about them but, like Bigfoot, there are only tales about them, not evidence. I wonder if you will feel the same way in ten or fifteen years. The old saying: "familiarity breeds contempt" comes to mind. I wish you and your hubby luck and good will. When times are hard you should think back on these feelings and try to be in that place of adoration again.
@@opaloakley Unfortunately it is that way often enough to be statistically relevant. And I would encourage men to be cautious and informed, not jaded and disgruntled. With that said, I'm happy you're in a fulfilling relationship. I just celebrated my 14th anniversary. Cheers.
Thank you Richard. I wish I had found you and this video before my life became the trainwreck. The ex wife pretty much did the same to me. I agreed because I felt it was the right thing to do. How does the line go, oh yeah to honor and obey. How wrong I was hey.
Run.
A girlfriend told me when we broke up that she thought we'd get married and have kids. I'd told her specifically that I had no intention of ever doing that, but she must've thought she would twist my arm. Yeah, right.
They think they can change your mind
Before I even watch this video... when you have a baby with someone, you are tied to them for LIFE. Even if you end up falling out of love and can't stand them anymore, you STILL have to deal with them (even if it's no more than sending money for child support.) the fact that any man is fathering children in this environment where female solipsism reigns supreme... it must be more due to accident than by choice.
you must get that conversation out of the way early....woman asks me what i am passionate about??...i say not getting married and not have children..most times i am called selfish etc.and that is the end of that..late tens early twenties dating not really a problem but when she gets in her mid to late twenties that clock is ticking louder.
RUN !!!
Be honest and up front with her, so she will have time to find someone that also would like to have children, she is 32 and time will run out for her.
My advice would be to use your intuition, how long has the relationship been and is there red flags? Why do you not want children? Why did you not talk about not wanting kids at the start of the relationship or did she think she could change you. I don't think the relationship will work if she is set on having kids and you are not. But love is about sacrifice (sometimes, that should not be everything) and if you love her and think you would be happy with her then do what you think is best. I hope things work out for you.
Another great vid!!
I think if you're not wanting kids and marriage, or you don't have a way to mitigate the financial and emotional damage of divorce, you cut her loose and start spinning plates. You're wasting time. IF you're Alpha AF put her on a plate.
"You are free to pursue your happiness with someone else. I will not marry on a timeline."
Just be straight up with her and if she leaves... well you got your answer...
ask yourself guys, how comfortable do you think a saddle is? if a chick tells you she wants marriage and kids, run for your life.does the phrase.."ball and chain", resonate at all?? when you marry a chick, she's got you, the state will crucify you..go ask any guy who's been through divorce..nuff said
RUN........
Having mutual friends can be great, but it can get people stuck as well. I think a chat about non-negotiables is in order.
If I were an American woman, I would want children of my own, alimony, and child support as well.
I won't feel guilty, but a lot of men end up homeless due to divorce rape anyway.
Tell her no kids, then move
I am not an Olympian - but I will run like BOLT outta there. They all get the talk - We ain't ever getting married, We ain't ever having kids, We are never living together, We are never sharing finances, I will not fall in love with you, You will never change my mind. There's the door - you can leave at anytime, including now. If they bring it up once, I will remind them, if they bring it up twice - I ditch them. 30 ex's down stream. from 90 days to 14 years - no XX is getting those out of me. They can all sod off.
I’d say the manly way would be to be honest and tell her straight up. The girl is 32, she doesn’t have much time left, frankly I don’t understand why she is still sticking around without knowing what your goals in regards to marriage and kids are. She probably just hopes that one day he will marry her, saying “someday when I have kids of my own” is just her way to not be “too pushy” or “desperate,” cause it sounds “independent”, which is a dumb decision if her goal is to marry and have kids.
Some of us are out here in these mean streets being a sole provider and raising kids and having successful marriages. Believe it or not!!!
The soap is great big bro I had a older woman fit on me and said somethings That's how I know it works
Too many fish in the sea. Sometimes you have to draw a line in the sand...
Dude your email is SCREAMING: Get out of this relation! You don't want kids yourself! And she's using the "children of my own" thing that speaks volumes. You are not even in the sentence. Marry her and you'll end up that "successful guy who did the one mistake of his life".
run, forrest RUN
Don't do it
You have to trust your intuition, if you are not keen on this then pay attention to that because the consequences for you are severe ! Been there...done that. Wish I had listened to my own inner voice decades ago.
This comment section is eye opening. Let me add to it. I too have had attempted sperm jacks. I always tie up my condoms and dispose of them at my discretion. They all seem to get very curious about something so obvious and tell me "I won't do anything with it". But the question is-why would she care? I even had one fish it out of the trash. Don't underestimate a girls baby fever. Be smart & safe.
At 25 I had a stunningly beautiful girlfriend who wanted marriage and 3 kids.
I was in the super tax bracket with a company car, career going great.
I did not want 3 kids and was not ready to settle down, the break up was very painful, been married 20year and know no children decision was right for me.
Maintain frame #1
8.35 listen to this over and over. Drill it into your head Gentlemen!!
You decide what YOU want and then fucking stand your ground. My GF would love to get married. No fucking way that's happening and she knows she can walk away any time she likes. She hasn't walked away yet.