Oh Lewis. My heart breaks for those 17 years. So glad that Esther Was there with you, and that you can feel everything. Life kicks us and you are helping so many of us.
Ester Perel is an incredible, intelligent and calm woman and specialist, she puts everything on the shelves in our heads. Each of her conversations has arguments and facts of behavior. It's nice to listen and watch.
She always surprises me. Its so clear and so obvious when she makes a case for a point of view. Her perspective is always a surprise to me. Or is it that there is so much clarity to her point of view. I'm sorry Lewis for what you went through w/ your Dad. It seems not unlike having a parent with dementia. Same roller coaster same sadness.
Very good commentary. Covert narcissism and integrated psychopathy have so many nuances that they deserve a long and detailed exposition. There are individuals who lie with the greatest eloquence in the world and whose manipulation has no limits. They make people feel truly special and achieve unimaginable things. Hopefully Dr. Perel will be able to make an extensive exposition on this subject in the near future.
Lewis Howes actually seems to be consistently generous in offering himself as an exampli gratia for Esther. He walks like a humble student before a master as his life experience gets used to teach others- especially men- how to have these conversations. It really is sorely needed, and I always am happy to see these two pop up. Esther’s voice can go from being a gentle candle to being a roaring conflagration of authority. Lewis himself embodies many ideal qualities in a man, so it’s great to see how he doesn’t avoid weakness but instead tries to embrace the lessons weakness can teach him!
@@ConstructionArtandScienceTeam that summary was eloquently put. Took the words from my brain 💛 so glad these platforms are here to quench the thirst of us seeking enlightenment.
Hi Lewis. I had the exact same experience with my father..9 months ago. He fell down and lost his memory...forgot everything and everyone. Forgot us...my brother and I are closely connected to my father. He lived in that state for 2 months only. But I still miss him. Miss not hearing his voice, his messages, our shared laughter.... But like you articulated so well, my grief is more complete. I cry knowing he's not truly here. Thank you for this videi.
And I totally understand this. I lost my dad twice, once when he abandoned me to his new family and then the second when he passed in the physical. similar with my brother. I also have loss in this way with my mother who often won't speak for several years and then come back as normal and wonderful again for a time.
The story of your dad was so sad. I was reminded of the loss of my own father. It's more than 6 years now...I stopped counting...but every year suffer panic attacks during the months he was in hospital before passing away. Lewis sometimes we feel relief on the passing then guilt and grief. May they rest in peace.
Ester's goal is for us to work out our relationships and do what we can to make them better as well as feel and share love. Narcissists DO NOT WANT love or help and they have zero empathy. Dr Ramani is best to ask about this issue and not Ester since one works for us and the other works against us. Once you have been on the receiving end of a narcissist in a brutal, controlling, and painful relationship with one (or more in my case) you cannot "work" it out.
The gift of feeling the full range of grief really caught my attention. How we can remain stuck and not realize it, yet do manifest symptoms in illness, addictions, etc. seems common in our U.S. culture IMO. I appreciate the interview.
Beautiful conversation about feelings and ambiguous loss. This is a huge topic and I would think worth a show - or multiple shows- of their own. I have a guess that ambiguous loss may be more common these days or perhaps more difficult because of our tendency to shut down emotions and not know how to deal with loss in general in our societies that tend to lack rituals and rights of passage and other important markers of life and growth and feelings. Perhaps I’m mixing things up but I believe it likely plays a part. Thanks!
Did you lose your dad February of '23? Was just curious that's when my dad passed away believe we are similar age too at time this is happening and now my mom last August as well so coming up on one year with her being gone, she was my best friend so been a lot -along with finding out in this year I have severe anxiety. I been watching your channel for years and building knowledge on my road of being small town entrepreneur at home so appreciate you filling the void of not having a network of people and presenting the information with interviews of people who have lead the charge - you are greatness Lewis!
This clip is only half about what the title says - the first half; the second half is about emotional expression. And the first half of the video does not tell you how to spot a narcissist. Lewis talks as long as Perel. However, Perel is always worth listening to, even for the few minutes she is permitted to here.
This reminded me of a conversation I had with a friend. We were having dinner and I shared with him my experience of being vunerbal in a group sharing my difficulties growing up having different minority labels. I told him I cried in front of everyone and his face changed and told me "Men should never cry."
i'm sorry you experienced that. its very human and normal for anyone to express their sadness through tears when something awful impacts them. your friend is having his own struggles and keeping himself under limitations that he grew up with. i hope you're not impacted strongly by that and know that you're very brave and open for expressing yourself in vulnerable and honest ways. i hope you protect yourself and deserve those who are supportive and trustworthy. sending blessings & take care!
Have never seen any of your videos before this. Just wanted to extend my sincere sympathies on the loss of your father and give you a lot of credit for getting in touch with your sorrow and how you are missing your dad, both for what you lost while he was still alive, and now in his actual death. May you experience inner peace and comfort.
Lewis, while listening to you talk about the situation with your Dad, I couldn't help but also think of your mother (or whoever was caring for him). It must have been so hard for her, being there day in, day out. 😥
There is no need for justification of men for crying, they also have emotions, it is ok to vent out emotions if u feel like crying. It's normal, men r also humans only and it is normal for a human to vent out his emotions by crying
Interesting, although I think, by "covert narcissist", the marvelous Ms. Perel means "vulnerable narcissist" - the two terms aren't interchangeable. Otherwise, she is brilliant as usual.
She explained it is nuanced. It's behavior and not words. It's behaviors within the relationship in which we'll see the truth. A diagnosis of a personality disorder is unnecessary to know someone isn't treating you the way you want. If you meet someone and they are over the top everything you want, if they want to move really fast, if they make little comments that make you question things you ordinarily wouldn't...they definitely have a manipulative personality and will prey on your inability to see the truth behind their seemingly perfect intentions. Can you spot a narcissist? No because true narcissists are usually very skilled. It's usually after they have tricked you because you are broken in some way..so fix yourself and any manipulative narcissistic users won't get you. Lewis used the same tactic to get views that most RUclips creators are essentially forced to use by the YT algorithm.
@@moonstrukk126 Thank you for this simple summary! I'm blessed with a great circle of chosen family where this behaviour is not familiar to me, but I recently met someone and my gut is going 'steer clear'! I'm grateful that I've learned to listen to that over the years! This person wants to end things, and I am fine with that! I think I'll be dodging a missile, not a bullet! LOL While Esther and Lewis may not completely cover the topic - the misleading title that's basically clickbait - I still find their conversation fascinating and engaging! Their discussions feel like some of the most authentic I've stumbled upon in ages, be it RUclips-land, podcasts, or talk radio. Truth & vulnerability have such an impact, and I think they demonstrate this beautifully. They show others it's possible to bring those qualities into our own lives. I know it's worked positively in mine, so if it can help others I'm all for it! Can you clarify what you meant by "Lewis used the same tactic to get views ...."? Sounds like you're saying Lewis is narcissistic - am I hearing you right?
I agree, men really did. And it’s a WE thing to fix. I remember a story Brene Brown told from a husband and father who attended a talk she had on vulnerability. At the end he asked her why she didn’t talk about men. At the time she didn’t. He said something like…my wife would rather see me die on my white horse than appear to be weak. It was an eye opener and foreign concept for me. My ex-husband (27 year marriage) only cried a few times despite the fact that he lost his sister at 28 and father at 58. He was petrified to feel anything. The man I am with now shared that his ex-wife had no room for his sadness/weakness. 😢 I believe that if we want change, both men and women will need to provide space for each other’s full range of emotions.
Oh Lewis. My heart breaks for those 17 years. So glad that Esther Was there with you, and that you can feel everything. Life kicks us and you are helping so many of us.
Ester Perel is an incredible, intelligent and calm woman and specialist, she puts everything on the shelves in our heads.
Each of her conversations has arguments and facts of behavior. It's nice to listen and watch.
👍
She always surprises me. Its so clear and so obvious when she makes a case for a point of view. Her perspective is always a surprise to me. Or is it that there is so much clarity to her point of view. I'm sorry Lewis for what you went through w/ your Dad. It seems not unlike having a parent with dementia. Same roller coaster same sadness.
Heartbreaking ambiguous loss. I feel u. Thanks for including this in the clip.
Very good commentary. Covert narcissism and integrated psychopathy have so many nuances that they deserve a long and detailed exposition. There are individuals who lie with the greatest eloquence in the world and whose manipulation has no limits. They make people feel truly special and achieve unimaginable things. Hopefully Dr. Perel will be able to make an extensive exposition on this subject in the near future.
Thank you for sharing your story about your father. I teared up. Beautiful episode
Lewis Howes actually seems to be consistently generous in offering himself as an exampli gratia for Esther. He walks like a humble student before a master as his life experience gets used to teach others- especially men- how to have these conversations. It really is sorely needed, and I always am happy to see these two pop up. Esther’s voice can go from being a gentle candle to being a roaring conflagration of authority. Lewis himself embodies many ideal qualities in a man, so it’s great to see how he doesn’t avoid weakness but instead tries to embrace the lessons weakness can teach him!
@@ConstructionArtandScienceTeam that summary was eloquently put. Took the words from my brain 💛 so glad these platforms are here to quench the thirst of us seeking enlightenment.
Thank you so much for watching! 😊
Hi Lewis. I had the exact same experience with my father..9 months ago. He fell down and lost his memory...forgot everything and everyone. Forgot us...my brother and I are closely connected to my father. He lived in that state for 2 months only. But I still miss him. Miss not hearing his voice, his messages, our shared laughter....
But like you articulated so well, my grief is more complete. I cry knowing he's not truly here.
Thank you for this videi.
You're welcome, thank you for tuning in 🧡
And I totally understand this. I lost my dad twice, once when he abandoned me to his new family and then the second when he passed in the physical. similar with my brother. I also have loss in this way with my mother who often won't speak for several years and then come back as normal and wonderful again for a time.
The story of your dad was so sad. I was reminded of the loss of my own father. It's more than 6 years now...I stopped counting...but every year suffer panic attacks during the months he was in hospital before passing away. Lewis sometimes we feel relief on the passing then guilt and grief. May they rest in peace.
Thank you so much for your kind words🧡
Ester's goal is for us to work out our relationships and do what we can to make them better as well as feel and share love. Narcissists DO NOT WANT love or help and they have zero empathy. Dr Ramani is best to ask about this issue and not Ester since one works for us and the other works against us. Once you have been on the receiving end of a narcissist in a brutal, controlling, and painful relationship with one (or more in my case) you cannot "work" it out.
Grieving and finding closure ...
I hope you find peace soon and move forward stronger than before...
🧡
My deepest sympathy Lewis x and thank you for sharing such a personal story that will give many others permission to know it is ok to grieve xx
You're welcome🧡
The gift of feeling the full range of grief really caught my attention. How we can remain stuck and not realize it, yet do manifest symptoms in illness, addictions, etc. seems common in our U.S. culture IMO. I appreciate the interview.
🙌
Beautiful conversation about feelings and ambiguous loss. This is a huge topic and I would think worth a show - or multiple shows- of their own. I have a guess that ambiguous loss may be more common these days or perhaps more difficult because of our tendency to shut down emotions and not know how to deal with loss in general in our societies that tend to lack rituals and rights of passage and other important markers of life and growth and feelings. Perhaps I’m mixing things up but I believe it likely plays a part. Thanks!
You're welcome,thank you for being here 🧡
EP is a gem ......i love listening to her
🙌
she is a sparkling lighthouse
This made me cry.
Did you lose your dad February of '23? Was just curious that's when my dad passed away believe we are similar age too at time this is happening and now my mom last August as well so coming up on one year with her being gone, she was my best friend so been a lot -along with finding out in this year I have severe anxiety. I been watching your channel for years and building knowledge on my road of being small town entrepreneur at home so appreciate you filling the void of not having a network of people and presenting the information with interviews of people who have lead the charge - you are greatness Lewis!
"Learning to accept something and doing my best to be ok with"
VERY POWERFUL 🙏
Thank you so much! 🧡
Thank you for sharing your heart and story. Beautiful to witness sacred masculine truth. What a gift. 💛
👍
This clip is only half about what the title says - the first half; the second half is about emotional expression. And the first half of the video does not tell you how to spot a narcissist. Lewis talks as long as Perel. However, Perel is always worth listening to, even for the few minutes she is permitted to here.
Louis has been through a lot 🙏🏻 Appreciative of his emotional honesty
My condolences 🙏🙏. I’m so so sorry to hear of your dad.
I love this therapist !!
Thank you for being here 🧡
my sincere condolences 🙏 ❤
This reminded me of a conversation I had with a friend. We were having dinner and I shared with him my experience of being vunerbal in a group sharing my difficulties growing up having different minority labels. I told him I cried in front of everyone and his face changed and told me "Men should never cry."
i'm sorry you experienced that. its very human and normal for anyone to express their sadness through tears when something awful impacts them. your friend is having his own struggles and keeping himself under limitations that he grew up with. i hope you're not impacted strongly by that and know that you're very brave and open for expressing yourself in vulnerable and honest ways. i hope you protect yourself and deserve those who are supportive and trustworthy. sending blessings & take care!
@@happyartichoke🩵
Have never seen any of your videos before this. Just wanted to extend my sincere sympathies on the loss of your father and give you a lot of credit for getting in touch with your sorrow and how you are missing your dad, both for what you lost while he was still alive, and now in his actual death. May you experience inner peace and comfort.
Wow! This man has been thru it! Cortisol no doubt. 🙏😢
EP is brilliant....she has one of the most humanistic analysis of human aspects..
I loved this conversation. Thank you.
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching!
Tremendous insight, thank you Esther.
Appreciated the honesty & integrity.
Thank you Lewis, beautiful.
You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡
I know Ice Cream flavors are special for every body that is why I ask!
So sorry to hear about your Dad Lewis x 🙏🏻✨🕯️
Oh how terribly sad your story of your father was. I am so sorry. Sending you prayers. 🙏
Lewis, while listening to you talk about the situation with your Dad, I couldn't help but also think of your mother (or whoever was caring for him). It must have been so hard for her, being there day in, day out. 😥
Awww Lewis so sorry for your loss ❤
🧡
Maybe Lewis Howes is the most loveable person on u-tube, ever ... big hug to Lewis
This has been helpful. Thank you.
You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡
i love her
Wow!! Never thought about being controlled from underneath!!!
I appreciate you both!
Thank you for showing love and your continued support 💜
I admire you Lewis💕
Appreciate you and your support 🧡
I am a cryer ... its my superpower ❤
• Two amazing beautiful human beings, interacting amazingly together, making justice of the background " THE SCHOOL of GREATNESS " ☆☆☆☆☆
Thanks for being here! 🧡
Covern narcissism is all around me!
Amazing story thank you fro sharing Lewis H.
You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡
I wonder what she thinks about people having opposite gender friends while being in relationships and how that affects the relationship
There is no need for justification of men for crying, they also have emotions, it is ok to vent out emotions if u feel like crying. It's normal, men r also humans only and it is normal for a human to vent out his emotions by crying
im also more curious about the depth on her point to hysteria and women being sexually abused connection
Interesting, although I think, by "covert narcissist", the marvelous Ms. Perel means "vulnerable narcissist" - the two terms aren't interchangeable. Otherwise, she is brilliant as usual.
The conversation missed the title „how to spot a narcist“
Because Ester tells the truth, she doesn't just engage in the latest trends.
Misleading title, also is the second part about his grief, again , not what title is promising
Haha I though I read it wrong 😂😂😂😂
She explained it is nuanced. It's behavior and not words. It's behaviors within the relationship in which we'll see the truth. A diagnosis of a personality disorder is unnecessary to know someone isn't treating you the way you want. If you meet someone and they are over the top everything you want, if they want to move really fast, if they make little comments that make you question things you ordinarily wouldn't...they definitely have a manipulative personality and will prey on your inability to see the truth behind their seemingly perfect intentions. Can you spot a narcissist? No because true narcissists are usually very skilled. It's usually after they have tricked you because you are broken in some way..so fix yourself and any manipulative narcissistic users won't get you.
Lewis used the same tactic to get views that most RUclips creators are essentially forced to use by the YT algorithm.
@@moonstrukk126 Thank you for this simple summary! I'm blessed with a great circle of chosen family where this behaviour is not familiar to me, but I recently met someone and my gut is going 'steer clear'! I'm grateful that I've learned to listen to that over the years! This person wants to end things, and I am fine with that! I think I'll be dodging a missile, not a bullet! LOL
While Esther and Lewis may not completely cover the topic - the misleading title that's basically clickbait - I still find their conversation fascinating and engaging! Their discussions feel like some of the most authentic I've stumbled upon in ages, be it RUclips-land, podcasts, or talk radio. Truth & vulnerability have such an impact, and I think they demonstrate this beautifully. They show others it's possible to bring those qualities into our own lives. I know it's worked positively in mine, so if it can help others I'm all for it!
Can you clarify what you meant by "Lewis used the same tactic to get views ...."? Sounds like you're saying Lewis is narcissistic - am I hearing you right?
Men really got the emotional short stick. We have to change that no matter what it takes.
I agree, men really did. And it’s a WE thing to fix. I remember a story Brene Brown told from a husband and father who attended a talk she had on vulnerability. At the end he asked her why she didn’t talk about men. At the time she didn’t. He said something like…my wife would rather see me die on my white horse than appear to be weak. It was an eye opener and foreign concept for me.
My ex-husband (27 year marriage) only cried a few times despite the fact that he lost his sister at 28 and father at 58. He was petrified to feel anything.
The man I am with now shared that his ex-wife had no room for his sadness/weakness. 😢
I believe that if we want change, both men and women will need to provide space for each other’s full range of emotions.
@@tanyacarlyle1422 that is spot on.
my father used to beat me up
Maravilhoso ❤
Appreciate you for watching! 🧡
@@GreatnessClips Sou brasileira não entendo muito inglês mas adoro seus conteúdos 🥰
You sir, do some of the most human interviews.
Thanks!
What are the question cards?
Ester sells them
My husband never cries, even when his dad died...
That doesn't make him narcissist.
That’s very sad
Let’s not talk about narcissism 🤣😁
❤️
Look in the mirror.
Many loose the ability to cry and belly laugh after being on antidepressants or anti psychotic medicine. This ability doesn't return.
Why is she so fine? Lol