Can You Be Christian and Gay? I Tried to Be Straight Ep: 6
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- Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
- Susie and Nate dig into more of their coming out stories and then switch into a discussion on what it means to be Christian and gay and the attacks and doubts they've had to wrestle through.
I am 62, today. I am gay and Christian. I no longer believe that being gay is wrong. God made us the way we are. I tried to change, but one can't change being gay, as a true heterosexual could become gay. It just doesn't happen.
Being gay isn't wrong. Engaging in the sin is. Big difference and being Christian you should know that.
Jesus was tempted, but did NOT engage in the sin. He sat with sinners, but again, did NOT engage in the sin.
People LOOOOVE hearing things that tickle their ears. The devil WANTS you to think it's okay to engage in sexual immorality. He hates you! Of course he will tell you what your human mind wants to think.
God is very clear about homosexuality.
BTW, God said that being Christian was NEVER going to be easy. We WILL be hated.
Looks like you are walking the wide road... we ALL know where that road leads.
Just and FYI, I have lived a celibate life for 12+ years....yes, I'm a lesbian, but do not engage in the sin.
@@RCanadian it’s the ACTIONS of a homosexual that God sees as a sin: NOT the person.
The ACTIONS are sinful.
At 65 I had to spend my life alone and in the end the Church still expects me to and they Do Not Care as long as I live my life as they dictate. I regret spending my life still waifing for that Brownie Point. 😢
Whenever the question "What if you're wrong?" comes up for me, I tell myself that "I still have salvation". I still believe that Jesus died for my sins, and if I am wrong at least I was able to live my life in a way that allowed me to see the abundance of fruit and blessings all around me--in both affirming and non-affirming communities.
Personally I don't believe I'm leading people astray. I think partially because I didn't grow up in an environment where I was conditioned to believe that the way I live my life directly influences the way others decide to live their lives, but also because when I reconciled my sexuality within myself I was able to love more deeply, because I could feel and understand what love actually is.
Thank you guys for sharing your stories and being real. We're on this (baby) gay journey with you 🫶
Thanks guys. There are no easy answers. I’m glad to have your community.
Hey and Nate and Susie.
This comment doesn't come from a place of hate, but rather concern and care, you two seem like genuine and caring people. I watched the entire interview and heard a lot about your emotions and experiences. I would have liked to hear a bit more about your theology and what your Christian faith stands upon.
To be a Christian by definition is to follow and submit to the teachings of Jesus Christ, dying to your old fleshly desires and ideals and rising again with Him in truth and the Spirit. It goes far beyond “hanging out with Jesus” or “going with what feels right.” The teachings of Christ are found in the Bible (and not what we think his voice is in our minds) - nothing added and nothing taken away. The Bible explicitly and without apology teaches in multiple places that homosexuality is a sin (1 Cor. 6:9-10), a rejection of God's authority to make the rules as His wisdom sees fit. Every person has been given the free will to choose to either accept or reject God's authority and Word exactly as it is. I respect your free will to make your own choices, but a person cannot be a follower of what God hates and also a follower of God. Loving God and each other is more about obedience than it is about a feeling, and the feelings will follow the obedience as a person is made more into the image of Christ.
1 John 5:2-3 [2] By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and observe His commandments. [3] For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments; and His commandments are not burdensome.
I'm sorry if you've ever been made to feel crazy or hated by the church, you two are clearly intelligent, articulate, and have the dignity of being made in the image of God. This comment is not an attack. It's a plea to experience the freedom and assurance of salvation in Christ that is only found in the humility of full submission to His Word. I'm open to questions if you have any.
Hey Stephanie, thanks for your comment. I’ve read those verses, and I actually don’t believe the Bible fully refers to monogamous loving gay relationships at any point. I understand that you disagree, but I really don’t think God’s burden for my life is to live alone forever. And I don’t believe the Bible is asking me for that as well. Do I think either of us have a perfect answer here? No, I’ll give you that. But if you were actually in the shoes of a gay man or woman, you may understand why questioning this feels incredibly valid.
Here’s the problem.
Unless you have experience being attracted to the same sex throwing scriptures at people who experience it isn’t loving nor is it helpful.
You can think that you’re enlightening us by quoting the word over and over again. But guess what us gay Christians know those verses because they are thrown at us all the time! Also as a former conservative Christian I used to tote those scriptures and condemn myself and others with those too.
Here’s another problem, there are thousands of people that have tried to convert from homosexuality to heterosexuality in order to be “right” with God. Guess what? They haven’t changed. The ex-gay movement had to shut down because not one person was able to change their orientation. They had a 99% failure rate. Conversion therapy is now banned because it does more harm than good.
Since you know the Bible let’s go to the two greatest commands that Jesus said.
1. Love God
2. love people
Without quoting any other scripture please tell me how a monogamous same sex relationship violates both of those commands?
And before you come and quote the few verses that we gay people should be living by you know there are 613 laws in the Bible. Are you checking your list to make sure you are violating any of those?
- With love
@@ITriedToBeStraight It's really refreshing to enter into a respectful conversation where two people disagree on a divisive topic. Normally both sides are so busy yelling at each other, neither one listens. Since we have both said what we wanted to say and cannot convince the other person, my only remaining suggestion is to go beyond the noise of all the opinions without and within and deep dive for yourself into the Bible (Old testament, New testament, the Gospels, and maybe even getting into the original Greek words in these debated verses). And I'll do the same. I'm praying that you find the peace and assurance you are looking for.
@@stephaniesimmons5977you’re lacking perspective here. It’s like in your shoes we’re telling you to stop being heterosexual, attracted to opposite sex. How would you feel? You’re banning us something innate in us which we didn’t picked on since birth. You’re diminishing it simple as sin along with other more valid horrific sin like murder, stealing, etc. We just wanna love freely. We only got one life, let us have our enjoyment of it. We are good people ok? Without even being Christian, it’s common sense how a good person acts. The saddest thing about homophobic Christians is that all you ever see is that from us, no longer knowing us for who we are.
You're saved by grace. Period.
Christians who think gay people should be celibate, don't know how tormenting it is to be alone your whole life. I am 40 and have been alone my whole life and it's torment! It's not fair that everyone else gets to be in a relationship and I have to be alone. I'm deserving of love very much so but no one wants to be with me. Nobody understands how bad it gets. I am kind, compassionate, loving, sincere, but no one will give me a chance.
The "no hate like Christian love" thing is the perfect way to say what a lot of us experienced that made us want to run screaming from the whole thing. If I could have grown up in a time, setting, and family in which bigotry and misogyny weren't a thing, it would be very different. I'm older enough than the two of you that I have personal memories of the height of the AIDS crisis. The rise of the religious right with televangelists like Jerry Falwell, Jim and Tammy Faye, Robert Tilton, and Orel Roberts along with whole "AIDS is a punishment" craziness drove a lot of the Gen X survivors even further away than they might have been anyway. I was a kid in the 80s and a teenager in most of the 90s, so that lack of ability to act on things with my disability probably kept me out of some problems. On the other hand, I still had to experience and see the pain and vitriol inflicted upon our people by zealots. That really does a number on the mind of a young person. I can't be around organized religion for the very reasons you mention about only being a part of yourself. I had to find a spiritual life and connection to the Divine without all the emotional and mental trauma.
Thank you for your content. As the mom of people your age and younger, I love hearing your voices. I know you kinda laughed as you said you want to ‘be in the light’ but honestly that's beautiful and exactly what I want for my children and all of us.
Thanks Kara ❤
I’m 24, bi and Christian. I knew since 5th grade, but the signs were always there. I have only out to some close friends and people online, because it currently isn’t safe for me to come out publicly. Being bi brought me closer to God. It hurts so much to hear other Christians being so negative about gay people. But I am a Christian. God talks to me most days, very clearly at this point. He has blessed me so much despite my circumstances. I know I’m meant to be with a man long term as of 2022, so I really look forward to that. I read a chapter or more of the Bible every night and pray a lot. Love the podcast! It makes me feel not as alone
This video was spot on. I have some ideas for the next video. Common myths and misconceptions spoken against gay Christians.
You guys touched on it here.
1. You can change your orientation
2. Being gay is like any other "sin" - same way you abstain from drinking, adultery, stealing is the same
3. Gay people choose to be gay or the "lifetstyle"
4. God punishes the Earth because of gay people like he did Sodom
5. not having sex as a heterosexual because the opportunity hasn't present itself is the same as a gay choosing to be celibate and not have sex as to not sin
6. Gay Christians are reprobate like in Romans 1.
I'm sure there are more that you guys can think of.
This is awesome work!
As a gay atheist from the old continent this is really hard to stomach. I can respect personal spirituality, but I don't think there has ever been any organized religion not doing harm, all those preachers (professional and amateur, like some people here in the comments) are too busy planting pain to have a lever for control. But I think you two are getting to the point with finding that individual spirituality. good for you.
Personally, I'd think an omnipotent and omniscient being, if it existed, would probably be a moron like Star Trek's Q. Then again, Q wouldn't plant strange ideas about morals in people, especially in questions of sexuality. Actually, rules are pretty easy: qualified, informed consent, honesty, and exclusion of permanent harm (yes, that includes knowing your status and practicing safer sex)
Oh, and for some questions , just ask science. if you want to mix oil and water, just use an emulsifying agent. lecithin or a surfactant for example.
Honestly, you aren’t leading anyone astray. All of what you all are sharing is similar walks as others.
The movie is called "Notting Hill".
This blog is truly a blessing for people.
Nate. How can I get ahold of you. I enjoy your perspectives. I could use a friend. Would love to be on your story.
We go through so much.
Both of you are awesome and have such strength and pure hearts xo
You two are a breath of fresh air! ❤
The short answer is no.
Keep up the good work ❤
I am 77 and was married to my accepting wife for 51 years. Cared for her with MS for 26 years. I am gay, medically proven. I was a Baptist Pastor and missionary and I am proudly gay.
In a world of "titles" I am attracted to females (me being a female) aka "lesbian". I also love and worship Jesus.
I DO NOT live the life-style of a lesbian; i.e., kissing, holding hands, cuddling, intimacy, porn, etc.
I have NOT lived this life-style (aka FALLING INTO SIN) for over 12 years.
Is it easy? F-no!
Am I sad? Yes, but sometimes in life, you need to do things you hate to get what you want.... I want eternal life with God.
The reward is BETTER than anything man/devil can offer me: my SOUL in heaven and not in the lake of fire for all eternity.
Yes, Jesus was tempted, but her did NOT fall into temptation.
Yes, Jesus sat with sinner, but he did NOT engage in their sins... he sat with them and talked to them to change.
So, long story short: you cannot be Christian WHILE ENGAGING in sexual immoral sin.
End of story. The Bible is clear.
Isn’t the life we have here is His gift too? Why can’t you enjoy your life here in this earth? Surely acts of a good person has a place in His kingdom and even more as a believer. I think you deserve happiness to be with someone too. That’s just my opinion sorry for overstepping
@@kasaaa_
What you’re talking about is being happy sexually. I do have people around me that make me happy, we just don’t have sex. God did NOT make hell for us. WE CHOOSE to go there by disobeying God’s rules.
job 13:5
No matter what, Jesus loves you more than you can possibly imagine. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise. Jesus promises never to leave you or forsake you. He keeps his promises.
...and I tried to be gay. Over the years I've realised that homosexual temptations came from an addiction to shame. I believed the lie that if I loved women (even as acquaintances) then they would suffocate me with neediness. I believed the lie that if I attempted to be an independent, cheerful man then I would be physically beaten by jealous men. I believed the lie that my boyfriends would be a father figure. I was in a gay relationship for 4.5 years and the more I respected my bf as an individual the less attractive I found him sexually.
Homosexuality cannot survive without shame. If you identify with the gay label you will continue to find new ways to feed your shame, with crime, drugs, masochistic sexual acts etc. As I learn to act on God's word and not my own thoughts and feelings (namely loving men and women to the best of my ability) the homosexual temptations are diminishing. Love is the cure and Jesus *is* love. *Be* love. Don't wait to receive it.
That sounds very subjective. Might have been your experience that shame was a block for you to accept your heterosexuality. But that does not mean shame is a reason for homosexuality (and why would it be? The logic is lacking, people are usually shamed FOR their sexuality). Look up the science, people are born this way.
@@angelineblue There is absolutely no proof that people are born gay. There is far more evidence that shame from negative home environments causes homosexuality. Check out the works of Irving Bieber.
Equally, people who have gender problems are indeed shamed by peers and family like you said, which exacerbates the problem.
Hey Sam, thanks for your comment. I would say again, you should follow the path that you feel you are meant to walk. But I would also say, have you felt real physical attraction to a woman? And what are you looking for in this next part of your life? If it’s celibacy I understand and respect it, but I really don’t believe that’s right for my life personally, but I respect your journey.
@@ITriedToBeStraight I don't believe you need to immediately label yourself as permanently celibate. I believe there is hope for anybody to grow out of homosexuality if you trust Jesus to release you from shame around gender, contempt, resentment....Every day is a new day to grow into the man/woman God made you to be. God didn't make boys effeminate, they often feel they must be effeminate to appease oppressive parents.
Happy to discuss my personal journey with you in private if you'd like to.
No it means there’s something to deal with in your case, that you associate it with homosexuality, with the help of Christ you’re able to overcome. I’m happy for you, but that’s your experience. You have to understand majority of lgbt have normal upbringing and naturally have inclination to same sex. That’s just the way we are. All the more for gay Christians to try harder, knowing the scriptures, with no such luck. So path of acceptance is the way. Let us be and we’ll let you be.