6 Ways We Want to Change the Funeral Business in an Ideal World
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- Опубликовано: 15 сен 2024
- You asked and finally....Kari the Mortician and Ask a Mortician get together for a conversation! They will discuss their 3 suggestions (each) to magically change the funeral industry to create a new future for the business. Dream big right?!
Kari Northey and Caitlin Doughty bring their years of experience in the funeral business, from the traditional funeral director/embalmer to the funeral director/business owner who advocates for more natural disposition choices. Together they advocate for customer knowledge and education on the funeral business. See how their experiences guide their thoughts on mortuary school classes and how they would like to see the curriculums change with the changing business.
www.caitlindoughty.com
www.orderoftheg...
www.karinorthey.com
@Caitlin Doughty - Ask A Mortician
kari@karinorthey.com
@Kari the Mortician
We need to make this a regular thing, Kari! You get us started on these conversations and it's off to the races. Appreciate your nuance and open-mindedness here and always.
Kari the mortiphilosopher
Love this collaboration!
Love both of you!
Ask A Kari? Karitlin the Mortician? The possibilities are endless!
Thank you so much! We definitely will do more!
Caitlin and Kari after two bottles of wine would be kind of interesting 😁
More than “kind of”
lol yes it would
Maybe like a “Drunk Embalm With Me”? (Totally Kidding!!)
Wonderland-When my parents left the home, I did not want their faces covered and in both casés, they would not. I just did not want their faces covered till they got into the van. Why? I never forgot that.
@@patriciarivas2638 That's a very good question I hope Kari sees. 🤔
I'm wondering if your wishes weren't granted because they were trying to cover up the your Mom and Dad so that onlookers couldn't see their "deceased bodies"?
For some people, it might be traumatic to see. Hmm.
Never in million years did I ever think that one day a talk between two morticians would have me over the moon with anticipation! 😂 and that they would be two of my favorite you tubers!!
The new normal
Yeah!!
@@KaritheMortician 😁
I dont know why they pin you two against eachother. You both just want everyone to know their options. Shocker. Love both of your content. Amazing combo.
Thanks so much!
I am a subscriber to both channels and love them!
My favorite people collide! I found Caitlyn 5 years ago that lead me to Kari, Lauren little miss funeral and the grave woman! Women of death unite!
~ A new reality T📺V show in the works ! ☺👌
Yes!!!
Thanks to both of you, I knew to request a direct cremation for my dad. I knew that since “death is not an emergency” I took my time after his death (in hospice), spending some quality time. I knew that I could furnish my own urn, what my rights were. Thank you for making a difference.
Thank you so much for sharing!!
I am a care giver of the elderly in their last years. I view my job as caring for the patient but giving an ear or shoulder to the family as they deal with these very hard choices and feelings. I watch your videos to learn more so I can help them. Thank you for showing multiple sides. Also my grandma told me stories of how things were done in her day. She was a farmers wife in the mountains of Tennessee and when there was a death the females of the family would wash and dress the deceased while the men were out digging the burial site. It was all very hands on everything happened in the home. I almost wish things could go back to that personal view. It was just the way it was. This was in the early !900's.
Thank you for sharing this!
Same here. It takes too much money now to bury someone. Unless you have a insurance policy. Then u might have some money to have a better funeral.
Yes that is how it should be done. Just a part of life.
Little Miss. Funeral💕Grave Woman💞Kari Northey💞Caitlin Doughty🌺
I love that this is girl power! Who needs men
@@jamie22cleveland :::::high five::::
YES!
Love!!
@@KaritheMortician i love all of you all and individually and collect fully your content.
Yes, you do need to do this regularly. Please! I have watched you both, Caitlin, I found you first...and thank you, because when my husband died on March 1st, 2021...I had somewhat of a clue. My husband died at home with me there with him...and I was blessed because though I didn't know he was dying, he sort of did...and his last act and words were to smile at me, say "I love you" with the sign language version of it also, put his arm down and he was gone...when I called 911 and told them he had had another stroke and passed, they sent the police and ambulance and checked and yes, he was gone (they dropped the EKG paper on the floor, I guess they missed it when they left...he was indeed flatlined and yes, I saved it.) But when the funeral people got there, I had enough where-with-all to tell them my desires and not be all falling apart. Which is a long-winded way to say to you both that you are helping demystify the whole process.
Thank you so much!!
I like the thought Caitlyn, about government help for those who can’t afford a funeral. We have government programs that take care of our living citizens, we should on those that are deceased as well. I like your thoughts on this to, Kari 💜❤️. Everyone deserves the dignity of a proper burial.
Thanks so much!!
How wonderful. You two ladies are Brilliant.
Thank you!!
Both of you have lifted the veil exposing what happens in this secretive process. I’ve learned that the rituals are really meaningless. I want to be remembered as I was in life, not a pickled specimen in a box with a lid. Nothing really helps the mourning process but time and the acceptance of the void left by our loved one’s absence. I’ve had massive experience with death as a cop and criminal investigator. I’ve watched nearly 800 post mortem examinations and working the recovery at the AA Flight 191Chicago to Los Angeles crash that took 273 souls.
Catlyn’s historical documentaries are fantastic. As a fellow video creator I know the work and skills involved. Thank you both for what you do!
Thank you so much!! I will check out your videos I bet you have some great content.
I was so psyched when I saw this pop up on my feed! I follow both of your channels, and love the varied perspectives on both. To have the worlds collide is wonderful. Please, do this again!
Awesome! Thank you!
Refreshing video! When I worked in a CA FH in the late 70's, I needed to get written or telephonic permission from the NOK to embalm. Approx. 20% elected no embalming. Some wanted viewing without embalming. There have been improvements for embalmers since I left the business. More PPE's are being used in the prep room today-then we only had gloves & plastic aprons we were forced to recycle. OSHA now requires proper ventilation in prep rooms since so many FH employees were subjected to noxious fumes. You are the new generation of embalmers & FD's & can demand changes needed in your industry.
Thanks so much
I love it when you two Girls get together and take us along. Bless your hearts! Enjoyed this emmensely.
Glad you enjoyed it!
I love both of you ladies. I first started following Caitlin, and then RUclips introduced me to your channel. I am so surprised that anyone would think you could have any ill feelings towards each other. You are both so sweet and have individual things to offer. Great video!
Thank you so much!
Used to be so scared, especially when my dad was dying. Wish i found u both before he passed from cancer. New sub here, thank u and great video!
I know! Aren’t they great?! The Grave Woman, and Little Miss Funeral are awesome too!
@@kathystay1078 I'll check them out, thank u!
Welcome. So sorry for your heartbreak :(
@@KaritheMortician thank u 🙏 💜
Would love to see a tour of Caitlin's funeral home, sounds nice :)
Maybe when I get back out there
Huge fan of yall! Caitlin has really helped me to lean very hard to a natural burial. Hopefully I can find that in Michigan!
Thanks so much!!
This is the 2021 duo I needed 🖤
Awesome!!
Oh! My Goodness!!! You girls are such a breath of fresh air. My husband wants no embalming and a wooden casket. No funeral. I want to be cremated. Neither of us want to have anything to do with unscrupulous profiteers. Can anyone still be buried on family land?
Depends on the laws of where you live
I love this and all of your ideas seem great to me. My father passed away earlier this year and I had the confidence to tell the funeral director that we didn't want him to be embalmed. He had already made it known that he wanted to be cremated and he was very environmentally aware. I asked about the chemicals used in embalming and what happened to those during the cremation process. The advice I was given determined the decision that was made for my dad. Thank you so much for giving us the awareness to understand the choices we can have rather than just accepting a scripted list of 'here's what is going to happen' when it comes to the funeral process.
Thanks so much!
Very interesting conversation! I follow Caitlin also. I personally don't want to be cremated or embalmed. After much thought I want a green burial.
Very nice!
I'm Excited! My 2 favorites together again!
This one is way better banter too!
YES
This is a dream come true! I was thinking, “Wouldn’t it be amazing if Caitlin and Kari teamed up?”
Yeah!
Here on the west coast cremation and memorial services are more common than traditional funerals and burial. There is a definite trend towards green burial and other alternatives to embalming. My father was a mortician; he, my mother, stepmom and brother-in-law all chose to be cremated with simple or no service. It was instinctive for my daughter and me to bathe and dress my mom after she passed at home, and I agree family involvement in the process is important. For me, leaving the earth with the least possible harm to it is the priority, and I wish my body could be laid under a tree on my farm to nourish the ground and other animals.
Thank you for sharing
I was so excited to see this collaboration in my inbox. You two are such an inspiration. My mom is even a fan of you both.
Yeah thanks!! Hi to mom!
You two are definitely right in your thinking. It’s all about that almighty dollar in the world we live in so if you don’t have money you get screwed even after your gone.
Kari and Caitlin, my two ABSOLUTE FAVORITES!! I really enjoyed this one! Thank you both.
Our pleasure!
You two ought to be great!😊👍
Thank you!
love this so much! I am personally 100% on board with the idea of the funeral industry becoming a public service. when such a cardinal and integral part of life such as death becomes a monetary commodity, it can really foster distrust. not only for the undertakers but for the future apprentices as well
Thanks :)
Very interested in hearing your great ideas! I grew up at a time and place in Brooklyn, NY, in an immigrant Italian neighborhood where the only variation in funerals was which of the two or three funeral parlors in the neighborhood would host the event. And I see that deliberately because it was three full days of waking, and the funeral on the 4th with floral arrangements filling the rooms and a constant flow of people through the room. Weddings were also cookie cutter at the time. Today there is so much personal invention in both weddings and funerals; it is quite a change from my youth and I think for the better. The thing that I think is missing today though is some sense that society give the recently bereaved some space. With no set mourning rituals, we are adrift. Earlier generations wore the signs of their mourning and were somewhat “out of time” during this period. Today we are back to normal as soon as possible and just driving grief underground where it makes us sick. Just my two cents ....
Thanks so much!!
In an ideal situation, I would have you both take care of my body!!!!!! Love you girls!!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
thanks so much!
I love you 2 together - What I would like to see is less of the large corporate owned and back to more family owned. It is my opinion that the more that Dignity owns the higher the prices go and the less personal service that families receive.
Correct. ✔
Lots of drama with many family owned though
@@KaritheMortician That's where "reality TV" concept comes from. 🎭
@@KaritheMortician The first firm I ever worked for was a family that had owned it since 1948 , established in 1923, and while i was caught in the middle between the semi retired father and his son who was the GM it was their focus on dealing with families like they were their own and never doing high pressure sales or ever telling lies to families.
Two favourite educators I respect and adore. I would love to see both of you do a regular RUclips educational sessions so we can get a perspective from two either differing or complementing answers. Love both of you for each of your unique presentations and helping us not to fear death.
Wow thank you!
Wow, two of my favorite people together !
Thank you!
Hello ladies !! I really enjoyed your Conversation. I agree with the Idea of government paying for Burials. Please continue with conversations with both of you together. Love you ladies.
I appreciate that!
one problem -- the government does not have any money -- you mean the taxpayers -- but -- a community collection would be much more 'productive' because you are not paying several people to process the requests --- all the money would go to the actual funeral expenses.
I got so excited that Kari & Caitlin know eachother lol very cool
Yeah!!
This is my FAVORITE video!💯🙌😁
Thanks!
I love You two, collabing! Tfs You both are Awesome! Woman power!
Thank you so much!!
This was such a fascinating conversation. Each of your 3 (plus the bonus) suggestions were so interesting, informative, and open to compromise.
Glad you enjoyed it!
My 2 favorite morticians! This is so awesome! Love you ladies ❤️
Yay! Thank you!
This is fantastic, seeing the two of you sharing ideas.You ladies Rock!
My 2 fav ladies from the funeral business. Thanks so much for making this process not so scary
Thank you!!
Love, love, love this collaborative conversation between you two!! So many good points and ideas.
When my father-in-law passed, the lividity was so bad that we couldn't show him, the family didn't even view him, the funeral director was wonderful in informing us that 'ya know, closed casket, really don't need to embalm... saving you a lot of money...' The rule of thumb I always heard was if the body is crossing state lines &/or if there is going to be a public viewing, otherwise embalming really isn't needed.
Thank you for sharing!
I totally agree that the government should do more to assist with funerals. It is about providing dignity to individuals and citizens of your country. We are people that pay taxes and help contribute to society. Much like education (and healthcare for many countries), it could be a government funded industry. This would provide a lot of options for everyone and if you are able to afford more (like private school) you can pay for extras.
Especially for those of us who are on Disability, due to medical reasons, and don’t get hardly ANYTHING from the government each month! I’m currently considered to be way under the poverty level, but I live with my mom, so at least I have a roof over my head. When she’s gone, I’m sunk!
Very true
Enjoyed your show KARI with CATLIN. Had some good ideas and as always both of you explained that things you talked about in clear and kind ways .THANK YOU KARI AND CATLIN. FROM NATALIE IN OHIO.
They're awesome. Love them.❤
Thank you!!
My mom passed in august 2020. The mortician was willing to do whatever, within legal limits, to facilitate our wishes and moms. I had some, and i did tell him it was my idea and my sisters would probably freak. He was very patient with our crazy, dysfunctional family.
I love the collaborations between my two favorite morticians, I hope there will be more of these!
Thank you!!
I like the collaboration
TED talk for Kari! Just like Caitlyn!
I would love to!
As a long-term deathling, I am shocked - _shocked_ I say! - that the algorithm never sent me your way. Glad to have found ya now - you seem like good ppl and the opposite of 💩! 🖤
Welcome!!
I love seeing you both together! Wonderful and knowledgeable, I hope you make more videos together!
More to come!
Really enjoyed watching the two of you discuss things.
Thank you!!
OMG !!!! I freaking love this.... I watch the both of you... in NO PARTICULAR ORDER.... BUT YOU ARE BOTH FANTASTIC
Wow, thank you!
So excited for you two to get together! Thank you two for making this happen!
More to come!
My favourites!!!!! Wow, both in one video! Yes 👏🏼
Yay! Thank you!
I love both these women and I’m really pleased to see they are inline with each other! Deferent yet the same!
Thanks!
Love and admire you ladies!!! 🖤
Thank you!
You two ROCK! Love to hear the possible visions for the future for the industry........at times it can be so sterile and not user friendly so to speak.
OK I squealed out loud to see a video with my 2 absolute favorite mortician together 🖤🖤🖤
I definitely need more of this 😍
Glad you liked it!!
I love watching both of you ...now together!!!!!! Love it!!!
Thanks so much!!
Oh my gosh! I can't wait to see you two!
I enjoyed this interview a little too much!
@@KaritheMortician Oh, I bet! With both of you having a great sense of humor, I can only imagine!
I love see you two together. Best video yet.
Thank you so much!!
So fun to see you two together!
Thanks!!
About something that Cari said... my hubby and I wanted to open a funeral home, go to mortician school .....but before we did that we asked about 30-40 funeral homes in our state and out of state separately to shadow.
We got a Hard No, at every turn.
We gave up.
Very frustrating :(
Thank you both, as a sub to both of you, hearing how you got here and how you'd change things is brilliant!
Thanks so much!
Kari's face is beautiful!
Aww thank you!!
This is so incredibly important and awesome, I’m so happy you two are talking about this stuff because it’s definitely making a difference! Much Love to you both and everybody out there! 💙
Our pleasure!
Love you both and it’s really great to see you both working together for the good! Such contrasting styles, yet complimentary.
Thank you so much!!
I agree Caitlin and Kari , with the costs for basic funerals/cremations. The government would probably means test it. Natural burials is a fantastic option. You are both visionaries for such a very important service you both offer at families' vulnerable and emotional time of their lives. Great to see both of you are such great advocates. Shame we see such horrible family rifts at the time of someone's death. I would like my wake be held with the coffin present. It is so sad to hear that Funeral Industry has the Age conflicts as it is in most of the other Industries. The dead wood in the industry needs to either step up and learn or get out. There is a place for the old and new. but mindsets need to be open to progress forward at the same time respecting the traditional. The educational stance you both promote is the best thing that could have happened about death, dying and the industry blocks or progression. Do people ever get buried at night? I have never seen that. Thank you both for doing this segment and I look forward to you both coming together and doing more of these.
Thank you
LOVED DEPARTURES!!!
It was so great
This has been really great thank you for sharing👍🏻
Glad you enjoyed it
Love your ideas. Some families need help paying for a basic funeral. 🌹
Thank you!!
My brother just passed away in Feb of Covid. And while I was making the arrangements and making calls. I thought of both of you and y’all’s advice. Now y’all are together. Thank you.
Kari is awesome. When both my parents died last year 3 months apart I used the knowledge I gained from following Kari to help my sister plan both services. She is such a great person!!!
I’m so sorry about your brother.. I found Kari’s channel a little over a year ago, and while I’ve only managed to catch her Live once or twice, it’s been really helpful in helping me prepare for the dreadful day, when my very spunky 92 yo Mother, leaves this earth!
BIg hugs to you!!
I Couldn't name a more iconic duo
Wow thanks!
Absolutely love that you two did this. You’re both my favorites 🥰
Yay! Thank you!
I loved the show. I agree with the things you too came up with. It was so great see you too together. I met Catilin a few years ago. She signed her book for me. Hope to met you Kari. I don't think your face looks like .... you know. Stay healthy and safe.
Thanks so much!
Wow, 😯 love learning this… because in the middle ~ around 12:50 ~ man… people don’t realize how truly deep & precious this is; the science and the spirituality behind it,.. truly! I’ll be back…
Thank you!!
@@KaritheMortician 💗💗💗
YES! Caitlin! I’m on disability! So when my mom dies, I’m going to have to come up with money, immediately, until my brother gets into town! We have plots up in a cemetery 70 miles away! So I just need to find the casket and vault, and just get her up there! On and I talked about this just the other day. And so Monday, I’m going to call different funeral homes in the area to ask if I can come pick up price lists! Love the two of you!!
Thanks so much!! Good luck!
OOOH! Caitlin! I’m so very interested in Death Doula’s! One or both of you, NEED to do a video about that! (Jodi Picoult’s latest novel, The Book of Two Ways, is about a woman who is a Death Doula, and also an archeologist. It’s fascinating! I hunk there should be MORE Death Doula’s! (And maybe there are and I just don’t know about it!
Caitlin has
Yes I do need to do that!
Of all the templates for change you discussed here you embodied one together perfectly - to not just learn to tolerate contrasts within the industry but to respect and enjoy them.
Indeed thank you!
There is not a license for morticians in Alabama. However, you can get a funeral director license through the Alabama Board of Funeral Service. To do this you will need to earn your high school diploma and complete a funeral director apprenticeship.
Interesting!
You 2 are the real deal
I am a new subscriber and love your videos! I may be new, but I have watched almost all of your videos! You are so kind and caring! Thank you for what you do.
Thanks for subbing!
Great video. You two are lovely.
Thank you so much!
Seeing the 2 of you together is nothing less than epic! Add Ryan and Bryan, The Grave woman, and Little Miss Funeral and I may pass out! LOL Fantastic video, ladies!
The funeral posse!
@@KaritheMortician YAAAAAAAASSSSSS!!!!!!
I would want money not to be top priority. Great video ladies.
Yes! Thank you!
@@KaritheMortician your very welcome
What a great video! You two are pretty much on the same page with customer service. Just different directions to do the same thing.
So true!
You guys do well on this subject. Love and light ✨
Thanks so much!
You two represent two very different brands of the funeral business. From what little I know about your associations with funeral homes with which you are contracted, I suspect the majority of your clients desire a traditional funeral. Caitlin is in a City where the nontraditional is closer to the norm.
To evaluate changes to the industry I feel you have to define the industry by the number of each type of ownership and somehow define the type of ownership as well as the type of customer. For example the customer of Caitlin's vs the customer of Kari's vs the customer of the little funeral director in Buffalo. You have corporate ownership an "community" funeral homes that are the newer homes. Defining the industry is a huge and complicated task but a task worth doing if change can be implemented and managed. I personally, am a traditionalist and plan to be buried in the plot with my parents. I don't know where I would go if I wanted a natural burial. My challenge is having my two disabled sons buried in my" family" plot.
Perhaps, Kari you should have funeral director's from each state answer questions about the industry in each state about changes in the industry in that state.
Thanks
Omg it's better than Xmas!
Wow thank you
This was so fun to see you together. Interesting and informative conversation. Thank you both so much 😊
Glad you enjoyed it!
Oh yay!!
:)
Regarding Caitlin's 2nd point: It would be nice if people could at least take a tax deduction for the basic cremation/burial/casket/embalming portions of the cost of a funeral. If the family chooses to purchase extra services, or if they want an expensive casket then they would assume the extra costs involved.
That is a great idea
thank you!
You're welcome!
Loved this, and learned a lot!
Body can’t cross state line in many states without embalming, Maryland is one of those States. This was my favorite blog.. Ilove you both together...my Death Girls...Yeah...
Thank you!
So happy to see my 2 fav girls together!!
Yeah!!