REFUSING to go to the family vacation because my sister is making a demand for me to babysit.
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- Опубликовано: 2 окт 2024
- REFUSING to go to the family vacation because my sister is making a demand for me to babysit.
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I love how the end of each update is, "If my family stops giving me ammunition, the posts will stop". Followed by, "UPDATE"
I like how he sayed Gilfriend
Yep
Even funnier how upset they are that internet strangers judge them by their own merits. Seems like they don't like looking in the mirror.
Lmaoo
And then the BIL sat down with him and had a man to man talk over cold beers, and just like that they squashed the drama. A HUGE juxtaposition from how the sister and mother kept dragging out the drama. 😂
The last update is quite the serotonin boost, its so good of a feeling for sister and mom to know they're being aired out on the internet 🎂
Yeah, this story was altogether satisfying.
Cue "Dirty Laundry" by Don Henley. And that's exactly what OP is doing. Airing out all of the dirty laundry that his mom and sister have.
Bro what is your profile icon
@misiosz1983 If you're asking about my avatar, it's the emblem for the Detroit Tigers.
Oh no! She has to take care of the children she gave birth too 🙄
You mean she doesn't get to just pass them off to some unwilling servant because "being a mom is hard, guyz!!!". Color me shocked!
@@khaleesireyna731 exactly 😂 who would of thought kids you gave birth too you also have to look after
@@lucindaroman330 it seems to be some pretty big and shocking news to SOME people 🤣🙄
@@khaleesireyna731 I understand that having triplets was not something she was expecting. I had twins I had not expected either. but not once did I ask any relatives to be full time babysitters whenever I went on vacation. hell, I never even asked them to babysit, period. wasn't their job, and I was the mom, not them.
Btw, by the time they were 6 things were actually remarkably easier since they went to school and I had alone time
@@Jerseybytes2 you sound like a good mom! Keep being great!
I know how OP feels. I stopped going on road trips and camping trips because I was the one who was expected to unload vehicles and set things up while everyone else sat on their asses, in addition to getting things for people because they didn't feel like getting it themselves. And anytime I tell them to get it themselves, they say I'm being selfish. Then the same people asked me why I don't go anymore.
idk how your family is in regards outside of those instances, but that, i can tell you, are either prime entitlement, or narcissism
@@shadowmaster335 why not both?
Next time they whine about you not going anymore, tell them exactly why you don't go (maybe throw in a bit about you have SO much more fun when you aren't everyone's lackey and fetch quester). They'll be butthurt about it, but it makes it clear for them that it's their fault you don't have fun with them.
I bought all my own stuff including a very expensive inflatable tent. I can set up in literally seven minutes and 23 seconds 😂 it mostly all fits into a plastic tub with a bag for clothes and a folding chair on its own. It's me that is sat down first now chillin, but that first time I did it then sat with them watching the Sun go down still unpacked was magical 🌅
@@blindbrad4719 Epic.
I actually feel bad for the Father and the brother in law. An old man and a man with a career have to babysit their wives while they throw tantrums about not being able to bully the youngest of the family anymore.
They need their scapegoat.
@@CheeseOfMastersThey're too weak to survive without their peasant slave
@@YourDadWithTheMilk304 Dynamics will just shift onto another, probably the sisters husband or the father.
@@CheeseOfMasters Yeah most likely
eh not really for brother-in-law - he admitted knowing how she treated OP and did nothing even though OP needed support/help but only started to do something when after OP started to pushback and confront all of them and post it on Reddit. Kinda funny BIL was angry at OP because of the situation when it's not even OP's fault - OP also deserves being treated like family and an individual and not some servant they can foist the kids on for days and hours on end and think OP wouldn't mind/can't fight back. People sure like to stay 'neutral' or bury their heads in the sand...
Hope OP stays low contact or just doesn't interact as much with them.
My heart honestly dropped a little to hear that the sister was upset to no longer be an only child. She could have been the cool older sister but she held on to a resentment of her brother just existing? That’s cold hearted. I can’t imagine how my life would be if my siblings were like this. The parents really spoiled her.
I'm grown as a single child....but all my childhood I wanted/ longed for a sibling. It's crazy how some people don't value what they have
The parents could have put the kaibosh on that in the first place. They could have taught the daughter about the situation and nurtured a healthy relationship with the sibling. My guess is that when the baby (OP) was born, all their attention went to him essentially sidelining the sister. That resentment grew and festered and became part of her personality.
@@shawnycoffman Children cannot understand that newborns need a lot attention neither do they remember the amount of the attention they already received while being the same age. The thing is as you grow up and become an adult your should be able to understand it and let go of your childhood resentments.
@@Mytelefeexactly and my money is on: sister didn't learn to grow tf out of that resentment because she was enabled by mommy dearest.
It only happens when the single child is a narcissist
I heard this whole saga. That's what happens when you keep taking someone for granted.
Bro has infinite knowledge of all the reddit storys
i heard this whole saga. this commenter just keeps commenting.
One of the benefits of being a blunt person is that I don't get asked to do stuff like this. Also, it's wild that people don't understand that "keeping the peace" is also a toxic mindset too because it minimises while continuing to damage.
True but people are "keeping the peace" when the person who they care about is in the wrong but they don't want to risk relationship with them. It's difficult to manage situations like that
@@klaudiaflislove doesn't equal enabling. You can love someone and tell them exactly why they're wrong. If you "keep the peace" because your loved one is prone to throwing tantrums, that's not love, that's enabling.
I felt that when it comes to being blunt. I'm very open about saying no to shit I don't want to do, things I don't care about, and opinions I may have when someone asks me for them. I feel like there's a good sweet spot, being aware of what YOU WANT and giving it priority when need be, whilst not being selfish when it comes to what other people WANT FROM YOU (within reason)
Eventually people realize that it's just not worth it, when hecklers see that you don't care then usually they stop heckling
@whitetober7825 yeah that's kind of where I'm at. If it's a ridiculous ask I'll straight up say no if it's something not too crazy I'll be polite saying no but if it's something entitled or expected for no reason I will not hold back saying no or absolutely not 😂
@@itsjustmaddisen usually my immediate response is no to anything that's asked of me, but then I'll do it a second later if I know it's not something completely unreasonable
I dunno if it's just a visceral response or what, but it makes it easier when people can't tell if I will or won't do something. Saves them the disappointment ig 😭
I hear miserable stories from people around me talking about how they're willing to bite the bullet and do shit they don't like for people they don't like and it just baffles me sometimes. I'd hate living like that
Update 4 is just OP telling his mother and sister to stop or he's gonna tell Reddit
I was chuckling because it's such a non-thread.
I actually love that for him. Mommy and sister are more afraid of the opinions of random strangers, so yeah all's fair and all that...
Well, if that work it's good for him.
Took them long enough to figure out that OP was not joking.
If they keep up the B.S. OP for sure needs to give out their real names and emails 😂
Heard the entire story, the sister seriously has a screw loose to legitimately believe her brother is supposed to be her servant.
Like I really hope she isn't damaging her kids with her lunacy.
Unfortunately she is damaging her kids with her lunacy.
It's mind boggling how she kept throwing a tantrum and trying to find people to back her up when the entire reddit/internet community is telling her she's in the wrong. Like if thousands of people are telling you that you did something wrong or you're in the wrong, chances are they're right.
@@gabrielspeight8289 some ppl, if they feel they are in the right, will do anything to maintain that, and if you really drive them to the point you shatter that, you will in essence shatter their whole personality, and it is not pretty, but that is what happens when you force someone who genuinly don't want help
The fact that she was being given money to give to the brother and she just chose to pocket it is beyond wild to me.
I feel a little sorry for her, being a first time mother is hard when it's one kid, but with three? She's going through a lot and being a SHM means that she can't do like her husband and isolate herself in her job for a few hours so she can have time for herself, but she needs to learn better and not shove all the responsability and resentment on others when things get tough. She has to talk with her husband so they can make better arrangements and get professional help and soon things will be better when kids start attending school.
Op, "Hey, stop loading the gun, and I'll stop firing."
Sister *casually adds more bullets*
OP: *casually fires more*
@@HughJass_MarioFan_2009 Heavy approves.
I get not being prepared for three kids at the same time, but you had the kids, and it’s your responsibility to take care of them. Besides, the over excited stage doesn’t last forever with children
The thing about having children is that everyone thinks of the instagramable moments, but few think about what they will do in the most difficult scenarios.
Children will be complete nightmare if you do not properly raise them and the problems will only keep getting worse.
Posts like these make me appreciate my own sister even more. She is also a mother of 2 & handles most of the things in their home, juggles everything with her job too but never pushes these 2 on someone else for along period of time. I see them every friday when they are coming over & me + my parents play with them for a few hours at that time. Every couple of months we watch them for like 1-2 days over the weekend when they don't find someone else & just want a little time for themselves. We always happily take them.
I understand that it is hard to be a mother of 3 kids but ffs that was your own goddamn choice & decision to become a mother & you should realize that you can't have the same lifestyle as before if you get kids.
Yes. When you decide to have a kid you practically sign up to devoting 20 years of your life🥲 if you have more than 1 kid then it’s even more years.
I kinda understand her being overwhelmed. Yes, she decided to be a mother, but remember her kids are triplets, they came altogether and she didn't have a vote.
I don't agree in her treatment to OP though. Just in the feeling about being tired overall.
Yeah I have the same with my brother, I mean my brother an I can literally argue for hours about one thing cause I'm too stubborn to let things drop which is 100% my problem, but we'll still spend time together, I mean until Avengers Endgame came out we basically had a tradition to go see each Marvel Movie in IMAX whenever it came out.
Xaà aww
My sister has 2 kids and is a peach about them. When she visits, she lives a long way away and our mom can't travel, she takes them places herself and the rest of us are basically extra eyes on them when we all go places. When we're at home our younger sibling and I watch them for a good portion of the time, but she is almost always there to help. The only time she isn't is when she's out with friends, which is rare and deserved since she's a single parent and she deserves a break.
I love her and her kids to bits.
My husband and I are expecting our third child and we still don’t expect anyone to watch our kids whenever we want. We even took a week long road trip with a 4yo and 6mo earlier this year. Guess what? We were able to take care of it all ourselves. Did we get tired? Yes. But these kids are our world and I wanted that vacation with them and it made my husband and I beyond happy to share all that we experienced with them. You wanted the kids, they’re YOUR responsibility. No one else’s.
You’re an amazing mother!!
Im pretty sure your family would happily help you out as long as you do not abuse or demand it.
@@Mytelefe they do! My parents are awesome, they are actually helping us out now since baby #3 is about to arrive and will help about a week or two after he gets here. And when hubby and I want a little get away if they’re able to help they’re more than willing, but we never just expect it.
@@briannacarlile9291 nice
“I’m sick of the whole ‘keep the peace’ mentality that sacrifices me to placate my sister” is an excellent description of how these mentalities are so messed up. Saying you want to keep the peace is just saying you want a victim to suffer in silence because you don’t want to deal with it.
I wonder if they know this story is on RUclips now. But that's nice it ended well and the sister has finally come to recognize her major problem and is getting help for it, that's the first step to personal growth and maturity. The parents sound like extreme pushovers given how much they were enabling the sister, but in the end they realized their wrong and and began making it right.
And I just have to say one thing. The sister complaining that she has to wrangle her triplets and is tired and needs a break as if her OWN children are someone else's responsibility was hilarious. Kids are only the responsibility of their parents. Get someone who's willing to babysit and PAY them, or don't have kids if you plan on being a piece of garbage and try to force your siblings (or in some cases, older children) to babysit for free.
The family knows op told them that the post is spreading to other websites, and they freaked out
@@Raph_27 It was posted on YT after that
@@midnitethedsixl4601I’m sure it was on RUclips before also
I do feel a bit for her tho. If the triplets were 3 separate births I’d have 0 sympathy.
But here having 3 kids weren’t a choice unless one died in the womb/miscarried, etc. Still, she needs to do something besides use OP
@@ma.2089I have had so many things heaped on me that weren't my choice and I don't weaponize that shit and use it exploit others. She chose to get pregnant, so she chose to play that lottery of "yo, you might end up with multiple births". 0 sympathy from me. It's called learning how to handle your shit like an adult and the only thing that MADE her do that was mommy and daddy not wiping her ass for her and taking her side. It's pathetic and she can keep getting chewed out for it. She deserves it.
I can't understand why they would insist that the post is taken down. Reddit is anonymous? No one outside the family knows who they are. The only reason I can think is that they wanted OP to forget about any good advice, or be able to distort the facts, later.
That and they probably HATE the fact that he got validated on what they'd been sitting there dismissing for years.
People like that don't want their targets to have ANY allies.
It’s her kids it her responsibility, she can’t just poop out triplets and expect OP to take care of them.😂
I am so happy for the guy family I really respect that for them. Like yeah he has is own job and house car too and money why did he need to take the kid
I feel bad for the OP. A crazy sister and enabling mother (and father to a lesser extent) isn't easy
But i gotta admit i _also_ feel bad for the brother-in-law. Sure, he didn't step in sooner, but that seems to be because the sister lied to him.
Now that he knows the problem he's actively trying to prevent things from escalating.
So props to him, but also big yikes for him as well. Can't imagine it's nice having to basically be a warden or whatever to your own crazy wife because she just can't leave well enough alone 😕
Serves the sister and parents right.
only the smart one was the brother in law who said nope in the beginning , didn't age well
And his father, i didnt see his shadow at all
Don't know why the sister's husband was so useless. I mean you could have cared for your kids yourself, so your wife isn't overwhelmed but chose to bitch about your wife for reddit fame lmao.
@@mahnoorashar2252 The sister was incompetent human being let alone mother. She had supportive parents organizing vacations and such for her and the husband was literally paying for hired help but she refused to use it because STEALING the money and exploiting her brother to hide it was what she preferred. Also the only person really caring about this anonymous reddit post was also the sister because she couldn't stand the thought someone was anonymously talking about her in a way she couldn't control to the point it took away her rationality.
@@mahnoorashar2252and remember he goes to work like cmon
@@mahnoorashar2252I feel this way too. I get the husband works and she is a SAHM but I really get the feeling he doesn’t do shit to help her. Don’t get me wrong, she is absolutely batshit insane and wrong in every possible way. But why is NO ONE saying ‘hey, what’s the father of those triplets doing to help ?’ The best I got, was that he gave her money for a babysitter. That’s not really helping, that’s throwing money in a problem and hoping it works out.
There is a real reason why so many parents don't go on far away holidays when the children are still under 12. It's more hassle than it's worth it. Also this story just tells me not everyone is fit to breed.
Me and my brother are quiet kids , well im 19 now but still quiet , my parents were more annoyed when we didn t ask for anything.
Parents you should be ashame to be call parents
Your sister is a piece of work take care of your own children get a nanny, dont have any more children, sister take care of your own family
Kindness without gratitude is depleted.
I would respectfully argue that your axiom is missing two important words:
Kindness without gratitude AND RECIPROCATION is depleted.
No amount of "thank you" will ever be enough without actions that speak to the truth of those words. After all, talk is cheap.
@@wolfehologram3539 That's a reasonable point, but I also think that someone who believes a "thank you" is always enough to satisfy gratitude probably isn't grateful at all. That being said, saying thank you certainly doesn't hurt! :)
@@skollseye7068 agreed.
She chose to have kids
It’s funny how the sister is tired of being a parent since if she had kept her legs closed than she wouldn’t be crying to mommy and daddy about wanting to break
Eh that's not fair to say in the case of triplets, no one really goes into a pregnancy expecting even twins let alone triplets, that's a lot even for the most stable and well prepared parents to deal with. Nah, I say they need to start getting on her husband's ass to actually be a parent and not hide away at work all the time.
Ive heard this story before but only up till after the family vacation. Its nice to know there's more to the story!!! I'm glad OP is doing alright for himself!
If you take care of her kids ask for child support period
As an older sibling myself with two sisters, 1 who is 22 and the youngest being 12. I will admit that i feel exasperated and annoyed with my sisters and more than once have thought of the days when l wished I was an only child. Both due to gender and the large age gap( Im 27) I think its something every first born child has thought about at least once in their lifes.
But they are my blood and bond and I love them in equal measure with my whole heart and to me, Being the oldest means set an example for them to follow and to also help protect and nurture our younger siblings.
And if i make them do stuff for me, I in return wil support them and assist why they ask things off me.
They are my siblings. Not my slaves. Theres a diffrence. One day the OP sister finally sees this.
It’s always HILARIOUS to me when people find the Reddit post and are not furious about the post itself, but that no one is siding with them and their disgusting choices 😂😂
Being a mum of three is hard BUT they could easily afford a babysitter, nanny etc so let this poor guy alone ! His life is a s precious as everybody’s lives are . Not everything is about kids . (And yes, I’m a mum, too).
She obviously has "this world revolves around me "kind of attitude
Sister can hire a nanny like most sane ppl would who feel overwhelmed.
I was the braai master of my family and friends for over 20 years.
A braai is a barbecue for you uninitiated.
I never braaied on gas cookers, as here in South Africa, we preferred the taste of our meat cooked over hot coals.
Yeah, aromatic wood and charcoal for the best flavours ever meant more work at the same time.
I was around 16 years old when I became the goto braai man in the family, and I loved it.
Then my friends found out, and I ended up braaiing everywhere we went.
We used to eat a lot of meat in South Africa then, so I was standing over hot coals at least twice a week.
The cook is the center of attention normally, so it's not a lonesome job, so long as there is cold beer to hand.
After 20 years of this, I tried to get the neices and nephews involved, but they weren't interested.
As I got older, the hot African summer heat and open fire got me so exhausted that I would cook, having had a beer or two and cold plain water on the way, then I would retire, without eating, to sleep.
I had had back problems all my life that got worse year by year.
I had started using a walking stick in my 40s already.
It became a chore to braai.
One day, I was told to start the fire... at my uncles house, and I flatly refused.
I told them I was done with standing over the heat and my back was giving me trouble that week.
They ALL knew how to braai, so I left them to it.
Enough was enough.
I would braai at home as I was the host, but I wouldn't be the fall guy and braai everyones meat at someone elses home.
There is a personal pride every South African feels when braaiing, and naturally, every male and a few females bragged about their braai skills.
Who was I to stand in their way?
Let them stand by their words.
The thing about braaiing or barbecuing is that people will try to tell you how to do your work.
It gets tiring after a while.
I'm in my mid-50s now and haven't been to a braai in over a year.
And I miss it.
Most of my family have passed away, as have some friends, or they have emigrated away, and I stopped drinking, so I don't mix with the family that keep trying to get me to drink again.
Pain medication and alcohol don't mix!
Hang in there friend. Perhaps you could host a braai with some friends who know why you don't drink, or invite specifically the nieces and nephews and their parents over as an occasion specifically so your generation can teach the next? If the parties are kept relatively small then it should make for less work to hopefully not trigger your back pain while still bringing everyone together. Regardless of what you do good luck sir!
@gigabyteguru2452 I am dying for a braai, but as long as I can do the work sitting down, I'll be ok.
Thank you for your good thoughts.
Have a good Friday.
I come back to this story once in a while because I just love this story and how OP stood up for himself. Second most entertaining story here!
Mom : You're Right(Crying)
OP : Yeah as a matter of fact I am right!
broo, the vacation update, why tf are you still going with them? just go by yourself... you can't even relax being on high alert
edit: also, why does the family care? not like you dox them by first and last name
They just worry about their image in public that's all. Want to look good in the spotlight but act absolute garbage backstage.
It is not public image they are worried. It is the fact that someone is talking about you in a negative manner and you cannot force them to take it back or shut up. Kinda like people trying to ban/deplatform others for disagreeing with them on social media. They cannot handle the lack of control over someone else thoughts and that they cannot force them to never speak out. The fact that an anonymous post on a internet forum means so much to some of them is a proof they have some growing up to do. I suspect the parents didn't care that much and just wanted to placate the sister and stop her tantrums.
Sister = Karen
OP handled things pretty well. Normally, this isn't the sort of thing I would bring to Reddit, as the commentors there can be fairly harsh and single-minded. But it did get his point across that this was an objective problem and not simply a case of him dramatizing the situation. It helps him to be taken seriously, and he may not have been without all those other people expressing their support. Not my preferred method of resolution, but I can't argue with the results.
The parents... not too bad. I don't see them as malicious or manipulative, just maybe a bit inconsiderate or oblivious, and clearly wanting the drama to stop and for things to get back to normal. From OP's perspective, they might look bad, but their daughter is also their access to the grandsons, there's another whole dynamic there that exists outside the scope of the story which they are trying to negotiate. Their response wasn't perfect, but I won't be too harsh on them. OP is a grown man, his Sister is a grown woman, they should be able to resolve this themselves. The parents are only involved because they planned the trip and because their daughter comes crying to them. OP didn't really try to involve them beyond informing them of his decision. They were caught in the crossfire a bit. It surely could have been handled better, but there's another side there which we aren't seeing, so I reserve judgement.
Brother-in-law... Sounds like a great guy to be honest. Another one caught in the crossfire. But he took accountability after listening to both sides, and just handled it well. I imagine it's not a situation he wants to be caught up in but he handled what parts of it he could very reasonably.
The Kids... They're kids. They likely don't understand half of what's happening here, and what they do understand is less important to them than that Pokemon they're trying to catch at the beach, lol. No blame there.
The sister... I'm glad she's in therapy. "Being a mom is sooo hard", yeah, no shit. That's still a choice she made, she willfully assumed that responsibility, and there are literally billions of other moms out there who can manage the stress. Nobody says it's easy, but it is possible and most mothers figure it out, so the whole mommy-martyrdom thing rings a bit hollow. She has a spouse with a decent income and parents to help her, she's a stay-at-home mom so she has an abundance of time to meet her obligations without also balancing a career on top of parenting. She's been delt a much easier hand than many mothers. And OP IS willing to help her. He was babysitting for free with no expectation of pay (he didn't even realize she was stiffing him on that, lol), and he kept agreeing. He just laid down some ground rules so she couldn't take advantage of that. He's not saying "Your kids, your problem, Piss off", he's just saying that his help is contingent on her respecting his time and resources and being treated fairly as an equal member of the family and not a servant. That's not unreasonable. It sounds like the sister is fixating on this issue as a cover for some other problems. I'm getting the classic "Damsel in Distress" vibes off her behavior. The type of person who finds validation and their sense of self-worth in how much others are willing to help them and empathize or sympathize with them. When you tell a person like that you won't help them, they take it as a personal attack. As personality defects go, that's a pretty easy one to address, and a therapist will likely be able to help a lot. Her behavior was very bad, but I don't think she's bad, she's just struggling with some things about herself and her brother standing up for himself became a trigger for her. I have high hopes that she comes out of this much better off in the long run.
Overall, I think this has a happy ending for everyone. Perhaps not the happy ending each would have preferred, but I think it ultimately leaves them all in a better place.
Family:" Can you...?"
Bro: " No"
What a chad...
This applies to golden geese in companies and how dumb upper management is for letting them go and wonder why 40% of their workforce gets disorganized the very next day.
I find it so funny how people go on about how hard it is to be a parent. How about you keep your legs closed then if you don't want those kinds of responsibilities?
Also, as a german i am inclined to remind everyone that appeasement does not work.
@theologe6076 appeasement does not work and one should never negotiate with (emotional) terrorists.
Also, you don't even have to keep your legs closed. There are SO many forms of birth control. Just use that.
Because narcs love babies. They like the unconditional love they get from babies, just not the responsibility of raising a child.
Alt. Title: Sister doesn't want to be a Housewife.
"the reddit post got me a gf."
OK, now we know it is fake
Fr I was thinking the same
Its most definitely not fake and it just explains that the girl he was supposedly crushing on also had the same feelings, when she connected the dots of the story she realized it was him and then messaged him. "PenholdLP" Try again.
@@Skotadios wuuuush
@@PenholdLP Yep, definitely underage.
XD .
I don't even know why but I read the comment in a monotonous voice of a dad tired of his child. @@Skotadios
A good ending? Where the family stays in contact with each other? And the guilty parties apologize for their wrongdoings and get help for their personal issues? I'm shocked, honestly. This is almost completely unheard of.
Yeah, i kind of hate how almost every AITA story ends in divorce or going no-contact with family.
The brother in law saying "nope" is litterally so me
_"But they are your nephews!!!"_
*"They are **_YOUR_** children!!*
I am considered rude by whole extended family and it always played in my favour
If you can't handle kids 24/7 don't get kids to begin with.
Everyone needs and deserves a break, including parents, but that doesn't give them the right to take advantage of anyone. Ever.
@@michelewalburn4376well exactly , but just because ur blood related it does not mean that the kids are your problem , she should ve just used the money she stole to hire a babysitter , and if u wanna have kids u need to take care of them, not to pass the responsability to ur own brother and complain when he says no.
Can we talk about how BIL is being a Chad, and he's the only one with a level head that isn't op.
And the sister has to have a couple of screws loose for expecting her bro to do everything.
And I'm happy op is to start to live.🎉
SHE got the kids, they are hers not your. They are using you as a free babysitter. Thats a BIG NO
That brother in law is a saint
Trust me she’s not getting the counseling she’s getting the different type
If you can handel your kid,then dont have kids?!
Tje actual entitlement. I am 35 woth 2 girls, one on the way due next week. I would never ask anyone else to sacrifice their vacay because I chose to pop out kids. Especially the dang child free younger family members. The child free younger ones NEED those fun vacations to make memories and have so much fun. MY kids need mom and dad to make memories WITH them
Sister be like: wait… I HAVE to take care of my OWN children? That is the WEIRDEST thing🙄🙄🙄
I love how at the start his brother-in-law was just like 'Nope I ain't dealing with this shit'😂
watching these are making me glad i have a good relationship with my older sister
I’m unfortunately the sibling of a family that the other members think they can treat entirely different to everyone else. To retain any integrity and self worth we’re backed into a corner where the only choice we have is to go no contact.
His sister is cray cray...its not his responsobility ffs to take care of her kids, the stupidity of some people is truly remarkable.
Damn, what a way to end it. Dudes got together with someone and is happy to boot.
Wholesome ending with the guy getting a gf.
What a hypocritical family Op has. They treat Op like a butler, only bringing him along if they need him to watch his sisters kids.
Go on the vacation by yourself and when they find out they will be mad!
Nice bonus at the end new gf knows about the crazy family and still wants to give it a shot even waited for him to bring it up good for op all my best wishes
My sister was like this during my 7th-9th grade. I was so happy when she moved out with her husband!
This is just a vicious cycle. I don't understand why he even went on the family vacation. It's not hard to take a trip alone somewhere else and avoid the drama.
she didn't actually want a vacation, she wanted someone else to raise her kids some of the time.
OP needs to take himself on his dream vacation and not allow anyone to dampen his enjoyment. Go nuts on art galleries!
My sis is coming over this weekend for my birthday. I’m going to hug her extra hard. Granted she never had kids, so she couldn’t have tried to make me babysit, but she never tried to create any drama of any kind. I don’t do drama either, so we have a pleasantly drama free relationship.
"Two birds with one stone" getting revenge AND a girlfriend from one situation is a HUGE W
Stay at home mothers need to understand that they aren't entitled to "a break". They chose this life. They chose to have kids. Woman up indeed...
Idk... I think they deserve a break too. But putting the burden on someone else without compensating them well enough .... is what ticks me off😡
Ob come on.... they're humans too and are meant to get tired and exhausted,.... don't act like they'll become robots overnight upon choosing too.
Kids can be hard to deal with. It's not a cakewalk raising them. It's so immature and indifferent on your part to think that they don't need a break.
The only thing wrong is choosing a scapegoat like the sis chose bro,and acting entitled over it.
I disagree. They certainly are but it is up to the father to arrange child care to give the mom a break.
They certainly are entitled to a break unless they purposefully avoid taking said break in order to steal the money from their husbands. Not only that but from the story it seems like she was getting plenty of breaks but she wanted to have close to as many outings as before having kids which is delusional.
SAHM deserve a break but NOT at the expense of those who don't have children/aren't responsible for your children. Hire a sitter, get help from family, BE AN ADULT and arrange childcare that is willing to care for your children. Its called being an adult and being responsible. Learn it and don't expect a pat on the back and a cookie for doing what you're supposed to.
I fear this being my future, I have an elder sister with two sons, I am single, and plan to NEVER be in a relationship, I have dreams of being an author, but she has gaslighted and threated to take her kids away if we ever turn down babysitting
She never will.. she needs you a lot more than you need her
Never fall for it, my mother did that with threatening to delete and it destroyed my life.
For people like that YOU are their asset so they dig the claws in to keep you in place, it's entrapment.
You have to set your boundaries very early and very clearly .. you’ve got to be crafty about it .. Good Luck .
Well they’re not your kids are they? They belong with her .. And grow a back bone..
I am incredibly lucky to have the sister that i do. She's way more understanding of my limits and boundaries. That being said, i do love taking part in helping with my niece so i guess she understands that my limits arent there because of any resentment, just my own issues. Makes communicating a lot easier when your sibling doesnt resent you for your existence.
The BiL is the worst. She has three boys and he needs to step up. She is still crazy.
Dear Op, I’m happy that you were able to get a satisfactory conclusion to your drama.
Womp Womp to the sister! Playing Victim for the consequences of her actions!
Why isn’t nobody talking about how his nephews are literally SISTERS KIDS?!? Yeah you have to look after them if you didn’t want them go put them in adoption to find a better mom or dad. Literally she is the laziest mom i ever heard because my sister has a little girl and she has never forced me to babysit the child every time in my freetime. Its so annoying when i hear this adult child having a tantrum
I mean, we all know WHY the narc sis has tantrums... its because mommy and daddy dearest never told her to knock it off when she was younger, they just gave in when she threw a tantrum. They paid dearly for the immediate moment of silence by getting a lifetime of tantrums. I don't even have kids and I can tell you not to just give in to children's tantrums.
@@khaleesireyna731 thank you exactly
If it's so hard to be a parent of triplets, i kinda wonder why be a parent at all of you're not even gonna parent and make someone else do the parenting
BRAVO BRAVO HE IS IN THE EVERY RIGHT TO POST IT ON REDDIT
Those are your kids you should have known that kids are a continuous job. There're no breaks! You shouldn't have had kids if you weren't willing to take on this responsibility!!!
She’s shrieking rn
It’s a good thing that your mom is there to help your sister with her kids if she needs so much help with them. Hell even her husband can, oh I don’t know, help with his kids. Or hey here’s an idea, why didn’t they HIRE a babysitter to come to on the vacay to help with the kids like everyone else has to do if they want adult/grown people time away from kids?! This sister is beyond entitled.
Reading those I appreciate my family more and more. The thought of charging your kids rent is crazy to me. My family is quite big yet we’re all tight-knit. Even with very distant cousins (kids of a son of a cousin of my grandmother, don’t know how to say it in English)
if she is so worn out, the sister/ mother why isnt she asking her husband to watch his own kids and she go do a spa day or something ?
I’m a stay-at-home-parent. My kids are my (and my spouse’s) responsibility. Full stop.
If I (we) get help from a parent or sibling during a family function, that’s awesome! If not, it’s no different than any other day.
to hear that op found a gf by the end of the posts is just great. really allows for a happy ending
I'll give props to the Father and BOL for both becoming responsiple and better people in this situation, you shouldnt be forcing the resposibility of your own kids onto someone else who doesnt have or is even supposed to have that resposibility in the first place, it is both unfair and can build up resentment overtime, even on vacations you have to be resposible for your kids, Parenthood is a Job without Breaks or Vacations that you don't get paid for, even if its accidental, you have to do the responsible thing thats best for your kids, not yourself, unless its a situation where quite litelarly cannot handle having kids, like being unable to maintil a stable life.
so he had smoke for everyone except the man who refused to step up and take care of this own kids??? bc the father of the triplets could have changed this whole situation from the start. his wife needed help with their spawn and he just let her terrorize the brother instead of being an equal parent.
I wonder how bil is in person. He seems to be very calm and collected at all times. I mean difficult to judge because he only makes short appearances in the posts. I feel like he being the biggest person in this story. Ofc ojs is in the right and he's the main character of his story. I just wanted to give credit where its due: dealing with 3 kids a wife with questionable agency at best and this whole drama. It wouldn't be a wild guess for them to separate, jet it seemed to work out at the end. I hope for the kids that everything works out with their parents
I would not have paid a dime unless a SIGNED WRITTEN AGREEMENT of them matching everything I done for the wedding be done for my wedding or my sister pays me back. Also, why does your saving account have your parents name on it?? Aren't you alittle old for that?? Don't let them cheat you of your money.
My man said, “fxxx dem kidz!” 😂😂😂
Saaaame
They had those kids so they are her & her husbands responsibility. Being a parent isnt having a day off. It is not your responsibility you didnt make those kids. Tell her & her husband to grow up
bro she thinks she’s just gonna drop them at your room , i dare you to try and leave them with me. i’m calling cps
I really find it funny that the vrother in law was like nope screw this i am out
I usually don't comment on these but it's been bothering me. How does the sister not have free time when her kids are old enough to go to school? Like if they were 2-3, I'd be more understanding. But from what it sounds like they're 7, they should be in school. The sister should have more free time than ever, in recent years. Her excuse of no free time doesn't make sense. It just feels like to me, she got comfortable passing her kids to her brother and walking away. These kids should have school, so she should have some free time. Not at the most ideal times of day, but free time none the less. How does she not have free time?
Your opinion ain’t crimson. It’s right.
I'm not even lieing I got to the part where the sister says it will ruin her holiday if she doesn't look after them, it's her fault she should have raised them batter I can't stop laughing
"BIL is going to give her another talk, I hope the drama finally stops now"
Looked up, it's barely halfway through the video. Oh no.
I hate assuming random stories are fake, but damn that last update just realllly sounds like another "and then everybody clapped" moment, and really reminds me that the whole series of posts and updates sounded like an average redditor writing a fanfic about the power they wish posting to reddit would give them, rather than an actual story. Idk, maybe it's really, I try to not live just doubting everything for no reason, but this one is really out there for me.
as the saying goes "reality is sometimes stranger than fiction" and believe me, i've seen some shit
@@shadowmaster335 "reality is stanger than fiction because fiction has some limitations, while reality doesn't"
Eh, personally I feel like this story is real for at least a few reasons:
- the writing is simpler, without pretentious metaphors, fancy words and "i'm 12 and this is deep" kind of quotes;
- the situation is described well without going on long tangents and over-indulging into irrelevant details, unlike your typical reddit fake story: stuff like BIL's physical build, hotel clerk's appearance, other family member's precise room arrangements, or color and model of sister's SUV - in other words, shit that overly fake stories always have (ironically) in attempt to add credibility;
- except for some brief key phrases, there's barely any direct quotes - instead, there's just general course of conversations recounted, no word-for-word complex dialogues;
- ends on a semi-positive note, with peaceful resolution - a trend even some commenters here noticed is that most succesful AITA stories tend to have ruined family, OP going no-contact, divorce and/or other nuclear option(s) in the ending - lack of any of those kinda makes this one an outlier.
@@shadowmaster335no, you haven’t.
They are 10 years age difference. Yet she’s the immature brat. Jealous she was no longer an only child and got the parents against her younger brother even her husband was mad at him at one point. That’s just sad and happy he stuck by his posts. They don’t deserve him in the family. Seems like a stand up young man.
What I think is sad is that the only reason anyone sided with OP was the massive public backlash. If OP raised this with them in private the best he would get would be some support from the brother in law, but I mean, the BIL is smarter than to just needlessly jump into the middle of drama so I doubt he'd raise a ruckus.
Sister needs to hire a sitter to help out.
Damn op lifestyle is literally me when my father bring is grang-children at home … that hit me hard