How To Make A Disrespectful Person Look Insecure For Insulting You
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- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
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How To Stand Up For Yourself Without Being A Jerk, Robert Downey Junior Style
We all have had those situations in life where we KNOW someone is trying to get to us. Maybe they keep asking embarrassing questions. Maybe they put us down with backhandedly. We know they are attacking us passive aggressively, but it feels like there is nothing we can do about it. Many of us don't know how to handle this kind of conflict.
In this interview with Robert Downey Junior, Krishnan Guru-Murthy continually asks about his history with drugs and jail. In the context of the interview, the questions are out of line, yet Guru-Murthy continues to probe. This video will show you how Robert Downey Junior handled the situation and the exact steps that you can take to deal with these kinds of passive aggressive attacks.
The good news is that you don't have to be a jerk, nor do you have to be a total door mat. You can politely be assertive and then exit the conversation by following the 5 steps.
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Tried this on myself in the mirror. Walked out on myself.
@unknowning unknown ahahha, righttt lmao.
😂😂😂
Can’t tell if it worked or not
Me too
hahhahahha
Robert Downey Jr is not the first guy to get up and walk out on this interviewer. The guy is known for his inappropriate questions. Kudos to Robert for having strong boundaries.
Yes, I cannot stand that guy. I think he's the one who did that smear piece on Michael Jackson. Despicable.
@Bohappenstance Click He's a brit
@Bohappenstance Click whats wrong with that? Want to make a sweeping statement about an entire country?
@Aidan Doyle You do realise 'saxon' is an ethnicity group- not sure if you were just looking for a fancy way to say British- he is is British but he's not 'saxon'- most Brits aren't (even if they are white and >100 generations British, some historically prominent ethnicities: Gaeles, Britons, Picts, Angles, Danes/Norse, Normans etc.).
@Aidan Doyle I don't know if you didn't read what I said but he's not Saxon, he's Indian. It's correct to call him British but not Saxon.
So If I got this straight:
1: Distract target with your steady gaze
2: Answer his question at face value
3: Counter with cross to left cheek
4: DISCOMBOBULATE
Haha lol
I like your explanation better! 😂👍🏻
Haha my brain automatically read 3 and 4 in a British accent
Sherlock Holmes lol HAHAHAHA
Underrated
Been a fan of Robert since the 80's. Dude has been through a lot, and he's a class act. Came out wiser, and stronger.
I agree with you 100%
Boggles the mind. Why anyone should pick apart anyone's life without offering up their own life trials is beyond me. Good on you, Robert! Cannot stand passive/aggressive people.
Growing up at the same time Robert has.
From the time he became public material.
Watching him.
I am glad for him.
I am a fan.
That happens with addiction. You learn or you die.
yup. just like most of us. hes a real talent
"Your foot's starting to jump a little bit, you better get to the next question."
There was something so cold in the delivery of that line that sent chills down my spine, and it wasn't even directed at me. That's just impressive.
It felt like something ripped out of an actual Iron Man line.
That confidence that the line showcased even made the interviewer startled as HE even needed to digest that statement.
Feels like robert was a second away from decking the dude in the face sksksksk
Ya it send chill down the spine its like the power of elsa is in dat sentence. So cool like air conditioner!
@@strangestcraze7743 i was waiting from him to raise his arms and blast him😂😂😂
It was a subtly strong, respectful but poignant power move. A very successful one
Robert Downey Jr is a legend in my eyes. Beat massive drug abuse to become one of the greatest actors of this generation, and to top it all off the man has both class, a great sense of humor, and is extremely articulate and friendly.
he can't act though
Maybe that's because he is so cool. He overcame great hardships, it requires a lot of strength.
@@HeyIntegrity You will *NEVER EVER* win a Fortnite match
Greatest Actor of this generation? Holy fuck are you watching the same movies i am?
He's an iron man
I sat with a coworker and my boss a month or so ago. We went over how my coworker is creating more work for myself and our team, and as leaders it's our responsibility to lead by example. My coworker got noticably uncomfortable, completely ignoring me and getting heated over the slightest bit of accountability.
Then as a last ditch effort she told me "Well I've heard some things about you, ya know."
I called her bluff. "Oh yeah? Like what?"
"Don't worry about it."
"No this is important to me if you have any constructive criticism for me I'd love to hear it."
"Don't worry about it."
"No I'd like to improve and the best I can be. Please tell me."
She got up and walked away. I asked my boss "Is there something I need to be doing that I'm not?"
He said no. The next week I was awarded employee of the month. So it was all just gaslighting. She was trying to get me to feel as uncomfortable as she felt and it just didnt work.
I had a co-worker who said that someone had mentioned I didn’t have much brains for the job . I asked him to name the person and he refused. I knew he was lying.
@@soneelita oftentimes they could be the culprit themselves 😂
Great job 🔥🔥🔥🔥
I have had this happen to me too. Tried to get the person to give factual evidence and nope 😅
@@soneelitaThat’s when you look them dead cold in the eyes and say “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
I also noticed he looked to others to make sure that he understands correctly whats happening, looking for feedback .
Potentially a manager to see what the next best move was (answer or don't answer the question) or when the guy crossed the line for example
Actually he does that a lot in interviews. This was covered in a separate video on this channel.
@@rabronin Which video was that? I checked the channel, but I'm not sure which You had in mind.
@@sylwioszka the one about him specifically: How to be the coolest guy in the room.
@@rabronin Oh, that one! Then I saw it, was interesting.
If RDJ looked at me like that, I would cry.
Wtf?
Me too man
I feel like my body and confidence would shatter permanently.
IKR
Someone tag rooooobbbbbbeeeeerrrrrrttttttt
RDJ spent quite a few years in jail. I think he is incredibly intelligent and he can shut down anyone he feels like. He literally came back from nothing and is on top of his game now. That's huge!
@Goodvibe - when I say came back from nothing, what I mean is- he was basically written off by Hollywood due to his past, despite who his family is. I think it's great and he deserves everything he has
I wouldn't f' with him....Takes serious balls.
@Asserting Word just came from that
@Asserting Word "that none of us really see or pay attention to." Speak for your self. Why do you have to drag down the rest of us with you, does it make you feel better about your self?
He spent some time in jail, related to his drug use mostly, but not "quite a few years". I'm not sure he even spent an entire year in jail. But yeah, he definitely turned things around for himself. The irony is that his most acclaimed work was done when he was an addict, the bland commercial stuff has been after his sobriety.
I worked at a school where we had a lady who worked in the office who spoke very rudely to everyone, i was new… she very gruffly told me to do something (not my boss) and I just asked “do you have a problem with me or do you just talk to everyone like that?” She was taken aback and giggled sheepishly and said she just talked like that-we actually never had another incident.
Impressive, honest inquiry and results. Thanks
@@carolkology4202 it turns out she used to be a drill sergeant in the army. Lol. We ended up as friends.
@@amyfromflorida4518 that's honestly beautiful, i'm glad you were able to chip away at that hard shell with one interraction. she probably carries that with her. hope you both are doing well.
1. *Hold eye contact*
2. *Maintain the benefit of the doubt:* - maybe it’s a weird question or maybe you’re just interpreting it the wrong way.
3. *Give them a warning shot* e.g. “I don’t know why we’re talking about this but...” (then continue on)
4. *Call it out:* you need to say “What are we doing here?”, “What are you trying to do?”
5. If they don’t stop, *remove yourself from the situation*
:)
6. Discombobulate
Holding eye contact is really such a big step. I tend to avoid my gaze to avoid the confrontation and show "I'm not interested" but it obviously won't work if someone does not care about how you feel or it can cause ppl to think you're not serious when you say "no"
@@Issacize underrated 😂
@@Issacize killed me 😂😂💀
@@Issacize that's a goof and spoof
never answer inappropriate questions... except with another question: why do you ask? did you really just ask me that? can you explain what you mean by that? do you realize that's personal? what makes you comfortable asking me that? etc this is a game changer that shifts the power back to you.
I do this! It works. I also ask them to repeat their statement. Many times they get embarrassed to say it again.
earthempresstv agreed, this is a great way to shift that power to you! 👌🏼 Good job!! 👍🏼
@moist faucet I'd dare to say everyone has something they dont like everyone to see. Someone jumping in to very specific question in situation is not necessarily decisive, because the intention of the questioner might just be to tear person down to avoid an issue.
Asking question back is simply a way to either return to subject by revealing that the goal of the question is not very sincere.
People have their secrets but revealing them to people who want to use it against you is not necessarily the best option.
Manipulation is a term too casually thrown around in issues like this.
@moist faucet It is simply hierarching the worth of relationships and giving them approxiamate uphold.
The reality rarely follows our assumptions. You merely assume that when people dont answer all questions, they are untrustworthy, but maybe they just dont trust you. Maybe they assume that if youre ready to reveal the most hurtful things about yourself, you're less prone to keep a secret.
Long story short, we usually assume the worst of other people, and it in order affects how others view us. What one considers dishonesty, others make a call to trust them.
In the question of pre-nuptial contract we can also make it show honesty. It tells that while person might be ready to commit, they dont go in without realizations that it is not merely cotton road and things might go wrong. It also gives sense of security knowing that these people are not hostages to each other and thus gives room to be loyal, not merely because of principle but outta respect and self-will.
Trusting someone is not merely about answering questions. But same time you are not forced to trust anyone you dont want. Still, what one considers trustworthy behaviour might not always be the same.
@moist faucet either give it time and treat it as buddy-level relationship rather than friendship or just disengage. The thing is that there are differing things which people consider trustworthy.
And when it comes down to "sensing" I'd take it with grain of salt. Usually our preconceived ideas murky that sense.
I've really got to HOLD that eye contact. It works incredibly well with a jerk . You can almost hear THIER voice trembling.
Life’s lessons their*
I tried that and the jerk just said out loud that I was being creepy ,-.,
Double the effect if you know how to raise an eyebrow..
"I was just joking"
WHEN I DO THE EYE THING THEY GET A N G R I E R !! THEN I JUST LAUGH !!! THAT MAKES THEM EVEN A N G R I E R ME STILL LAUGHING CIRCLE !!! THEN I WALK AWAY WHILE THEY R STILL YELLING ME STILL LAUGHING !!!
So good 👌
As someone who used to really piss off most Army officers, I'll add that RDJ's facial expression, half smiling at the absurdity of the other person, is important too. He does a good job of staying calm through the whole thing, but the "Bye!" at the end is my favorite part. I watched my wife deal with her father who could be charitably described as having a few personality issues, and removing yourself from the situation (And this includes all means of contact, like social media or telephone) is the meanest and most effective thing one can do to a narcissist.
People get mad at me for smiling at them when I piss them off, even when they know they’re in the wrong.
As a person who has rarely found much value in celebrity culture, this gave me a whole new level of respect for RDJ.
I have no respect for someone paid that much for doing so little. He might be a nice guy in real life, and I'm sure I would have made even worse choices if I was in his shoes, who knows. But really? respect? His claim to fame as a teen is softening the image of the trust fund kids of rentier class parasites to make them look kool or misunderstood(the Bayer and Dupont heirs tell quite a different story). He's carried that elites-R-kool schtick on into a positive portrayal of a tech and MIC grifter as Tony Stark...in the real world tech tycoons (Bill Gates/Elon Mosk/Bezos) steal and privatize knowledge, crush labor movements, promote war and slave labor abroad via their media outlets(MSNBC,wapo) or business dealings, and hold innovation back if it conflicts with their bottom line and by destroying or buying out more capable and competent competitiors (Skype) . His whole life seems to me a whitewashing PR stunt for the deplorable grifters, Hollywood monopolists, devil-may-care burnittotheground capitalists, and imperialists who are keeping us all poor with austerity, are destabilizing our world politique, and are devastating the planet beyond repair. He is certainly not someone to hold to higher esteem than my school teachers, carpenter, or plumber who actually work for their keep and constructively attempt to make this world a better place to live, let alone many actors in the theatre, where the art form has more meaning than self-promotion, money, and propaganda.
@@zackbarkley7593 I understand your feelings my friend, but why be mad at at the man instead of the system?
@@magnus_cockstrong I'm not mad at all at RDJ...probably a very kool guy in real life. But respect or high esteem...we're concentrating in society on completely the wrong people. I have complete disrespect for the interviewer, not because he asked the questions, but because he's bothering interviewing RDJ at all.
@@zackbarkley7593 you're not wrong, but how much can we resist the overwhelming veil of American propaganda,?
@@magnus_cockstrong Recognition, discussions with family and friends, and trying anyway you can (not just voting) to make things better. It ain't gonna be easy...nothing good ever is. People really do have the power to make the world a better place than the one the rich and those who emulate or worship them are now ruining beyond repair. I don't have anything against RDJ personally more than any other of the Hollywood grifters, but the ideology he represents is not good, and losing the false religion and idol worship of these guys would be i think a step in the right direction for our culture. The egalitarian, social justice, and communal roots of American culture need rediscovery by recognizing and cultivating real heros amongst us, not imaginary ones among them.
The maturity in which Robert Downey Jr. handled this interviewer stands as a testimony to his resolve of his old self.
@divyanshu pandey a lot of people would probably freak out right away
I remember seeing this interview and cringing hard, thinking "WTF is the interviewer doing? Why with the deeply personal... it's supposed to be a film interview not a therapy session!" and being in awe of RDJs intensity and control. This CoC breakdown just made it even more awesome with the emotional intelligence on display.
@Howardsend88 man you talk like a 5yo and you are telling us about maturity
@divyanshu pandey I mean he could’ve taken the tarantino route. Same interviewer too.
Maturity? Haha. About time. The guy is like 58 years old.
Despite all evidence to the contrary, it's NOT "unprofessional" to get up and leave or walk away; if anything, it's the most professional thing you can do or be!
When I was in the military I walked away from an abusive superior I was sent to captain's mast😒
@@dastuffster150 what is that?
@@om-qg7ju it's plank that they make you walk on to throw you off the ship
@@djsonicc funny
@Elevator Music Way to go! Be you.
His lil' "bye" was so powerful lmao he managed this interview so well
Putting a list here for myself:
1) Eye contact
2) Benefit of the doubt (answer question at face value)
3) Warning shot (I don't know why we're talking about this but...)
4) Call it out (what's going on here?)
5) If necessary, remove yourself from the situation.
EDIT: noticed someone else already did this but i wanted to add some stuff
What does face value mean ?
answer the question honestly and don't let them know not to pursue the subject
@@iamdanish99havocx79 to take something at face value is to not focus on the implications or underlying meanings. The interviewers original question (cant remember it exactly atm) had a lot of underlying implications (he is saying more than he is saying) and instead of getting upset RDJ gives him the benefit of the doubt and just answers his question as if there was no underlying meaning. I hope this helps and was understandable.
iamdanish99 taking a person or a situation for what you perceive it to be. In the South, the optimal phrase is “It is, what it is.”
@@iamdanish99havocx79 Hi. Not going into the question in depth, giving a general, vague answer.
"I'm just asking questions" is the most annoying sentence in interviewing history. Of course you're asking questions. But the questions you choose to ask have a meaning and intention behind them.
I too felt it exactly the same..
Easy manipulation. Don’t want to answer the question so you answer an easier one. Why? Nah. What? Why I’m just asking you a questions. Pretty slimy which most interviewers are
No one "just asks questions". A question is designed to illicit an answer they want ;)
completely agree, its such a dishonest statement and way of framing it.
another one "I'm just Saying", make me wants to punch a throat, slap both ears, and Batista bomb right there.
He was so calm and collected, he didn't give him anything. He's awesome and I admire him.
kneel
7:03 is when he absolutely checked out from this interview.
Quite the change for him.. great guy.
I find it weird they got mad about it on TV for no reason
when fool don't know how to say ''your questions are irrelevant for topic'' but just loses its grip and pathetically runs
It feels great to stand up for yourself and your boundaries. If you're struggling with this just remember the awkwardness feels better than that feeling of regret for not saying anything. Keep practicing, you will get better and more confident and stronger each time. Even if your voice is shaking while you say what you have to, you'll feel the self-respect level-up afterwards.
I just stare at people when I know they're being passive aggressive. Maintain direct eye contact, neutral expression, and remain completely silent. It really freaks them out.
Love it .
Especially with a face like that
I'm gonna try it out !
Silence can be intimidating. My kids learned that from me but when they tried to use it on me I had to teach them parts 2 and 3 of that lesson which are 2) it doesn't work on everyone and, 3) don't try to use it on people who are in a position of authority over you or someone who takes care of you. The key to the technique is the neutral expression. If people can't read you, they will think twice about messing with you.
I love it
Robert Downey Jr is one of my heroes. He has taken responsibility for his mistakes and does not pretend they did not happen. He learned from his mistakes and became a better person and a better actor and role model. To do what he did takes a lot of courage. I have much admiration for him.
Gretta Hayward Yep ... Great job
I admire him too.
Yea, but most people don't have to do it with the whole world watching and then asking about it and reminding them of their struggles 20 years' later. He is one of the few "celebrities" I admire, and this is part of the reason why.
Ok, I see where you are coming from. This is probably the reason why I don't rate most celebrities. In fact, my favourite celebrity is one that is almost never in the spotlight - John Cusack.
SUPER GOOD LOOKING TOO !!!
if you're gonna ask difficult questions, ask them confidently ...
Jakub Gancarz Howard stern
Im going to ask my teacher in a respectful way if he could respect me like im respecting him, because literally the first time I met him he gave me attitude and he was extremely rude, then in the very early morning I went to ask him for help and again he was getting mad at me and stuff, but I need the confidence to tell him to respect me and stop getting mad all the time
@@santicheeks1106 how are you now?
@@ifyouhaveghosts6 good I took that class out for another class that was available
atleast say you dont mean to be rude or passive aggressive or acnowledge that its hard to make the question seem polite but you dont mean it that way
I had a "friend" that was the guy who would bring up stories and subject matter that seemed innocuous to everyone else but he knew might provoke me in a passive-aggressive way. He was weak minded, weak emotionally, and weak willed, and that's why he did it. He doesn't have any balls. His dad is/was a police officer so he knew he could fall back on him for anything that went down. I called him out about what he was doing in front of some girls that he was trying to impress by his attempt at humiliating me. (Look at me, the top dog, girls. Ho ho ho.) I forced the issue he had brought up and kept at him as to why it was relevant, telling him that he mentioned it to use against me because there were skirts in the room he was trying to impress and he stumbled because the conversation he had mapped out in his head didn't go according to plan. He got humiliated.
"and he stumbled because the conversation he had mapped out in his head didn't go according to plan"
I've been subjected to conversation mapping many, many times. The warning shot is usually all it takes to trip them because they didn't plan for being challenged by someone with self-respect.
RDJ is such a cool guy, man. There is just something about him that is warm and friendly, but badass and cold at the same time.
You mean his iron suit?
I love him 3000
@@uraharamitchell7250
Same
Interviewer: Alright I have a question about your past!!!
Robert Downey Jr: I am Ironman, goodbye!!!
Interviewer: Nani???!!!
But he wasn't cool. He lost his cool under really not much fire at all and walked out. NOT COOL.
Boss yelled in my face...i calmly said "Don't yell at me" Boss yelled "Im not yelling at you"! I calmly responded "Yes...you are. I don't need the stress". I walked out of my job. Boss called asked if I quit. I answered that I walked out to avoid jail. Also reminded my Boss I was a grown and this behavior will not be tolerated by me...We spoke the next day, Boss apologized. Never happened again. Boss respects me now. Done.
Ocularion9 .. Omg brilliant!!!! See, a bully will only bully IF you let them ! You did brilliantly to keep your head . Pat yourself on the back ...boss looked very small in the end 👍👍👍
Next time you go to work look at him and say "Look at me.... I'm the boss now"
Don’t outright quit though get those unemployment checks and get fired
@@rileywooten1381 i didn't quit..just walked out for the day....to calm down.
And then everybody clapped
This is like a self-defense class but for verbal conversation.
It really is. Masterpiece!
Speaking is a use of force, in the same way diplomacy and warfare are just stages of negotiation.
I like this thread here. This really ties into emotional intelligence, also. I'm going to be learning more about him now, respect!
The Gentleman’s Defense
As basically pointed out by Googie Gress these are the first few steps to actual physical self defense. Unless you are jumped in a dark ally these are the very sort of "conversations" that lead to fights and hospital visits. Skills like this literally save lives.
This interviewer knew EXACTLY what he was doing, but he clearly wasn’t expecting this sort of a silent backlash from RDJ. He turns into a blubbering coward, doesn’t even have the balls to look him in the eye, whereas RDJ stares him down the entire time.
Yeah, generally when you face down people like this they either collapse into a puddle or fly into a rage.
That's the beauty of it. Meanies are always cowards.
@@mitchh3092 Like they just don't know what to do
His balls shrunk all the way up into his throat at the end
It's interesting that we interpret the interviewer as having/not having "balls" ...but what he didn't have was common decency. I'm not seeing balls as a positive thing here.
Just because you got the interview doesn't mean you have free reign to tear up the subject. RDJ clearly didn't like the line of questions, and the RIGHT thing to do has nothing to do with "balls" and everything to do with appropriate social behaviors.
I don't think it takes balls to keep going at someone regardless of their discomfort. He doesn't have to do this. Balls, or strength, or nerve, or whatever is meant by that? ...it takes balls to recognize that your planned interview tactic isn't getting you a good interview and to change direction and talk about something he does wish to discuss - The movie he's promoting. Stuff your plans for a "make the subject cry" Oprah interview and do the right thing, because he's telling you he doesn't want to go down this line. I'm more impressed by someone who can read the room than by someone who plows ahead without reading the signals.
Just realized I watched this like, years ago but never posted. RUclips randomly suggested this out of nowhere and so I felt compelled to watch it again. The fact that the interviewer kept trying just astounds me. So many obvious warnings from RDJ, so many moments where the interviewer could've pivoted back to the topic at hand and saved face. Dunno what that guy is doing now but I sure hope he's not an interviewer anymore.
Big props to RDJ. Kept his composure even when getting annoyed. Stayed amicable, but not a push over either. Gave those warning shots but wasn't accusatory about them. 100% win on his part.
1. Maintain eye contact
2. Give Benefit of the doubt
3.Warning shot
4. Walk out
WHAT ISA. WARNING SHOT
@@elizabethbennet4791politely make them aware that they are going down the wrong path.
In this case it is RDJ asking “Are we promoting a movie here?”, he laughs when he says it but the implication is : “you are going off topic and I don’t want to talk about this”
So if for example someone is talking about you in a way that is rude, you might say “I’m not sure that’s right/true so let’s move on to talking about x” in a polite, jokey way.
Then if they persist, everyone will see that you gave them fair warning to stop before calling them out and walking away.
@@Jixaw15 But what is the 'wrong path'? Is that open for negotiation? An honest answer from Krishnan Guru-Murthy might be 'You may be promoting a film, but this is for a general news programme so please give me something of substance, such as reflecting about art in culture, that can justify including this item.' The upshot was that British viewers concluded RDJ is a prick(ly character).
@@Cedders001 krishnan pushed on an issue that RDJ clearly did not want to talk about, and shouldn't have to talk about while promoting an Avengers movie. Given that it is not up to Krishnan what questions RDJ should and shoudnt answer, I think that makes him the prick(ly character).
@@Jixaw15exactly. Plus it's not up to Rdj who he gives interviews to in order to promote The Avangers. He is paid to promote the film. It's not up to RDJ to justify having him on Channel 4 news, that decision was the broadcaster Channel 4 and the makers ITN. Neither is up to Krishnan as a news reader, but at the same time it's not RDJ to justify being on the news because he didn't come off the plane in London and head down to Channel 4 hq demanding to go on the news. This is really ITN & Channel 4's fault for booking the slot, not making RDJ aware of the type of show it is and thus justifying using C4 news as a promotional vehicle for the Avengers.
Insecure people are fascinated with others' insecurities. Angry people are fascinated with anger. Etc etc. We all have our own laundry list of flaws, and we can spend our whole life focusing on them, or we can focus on the positive, within ourselves and others, and actually be productive.
Pardon me, well said.
Great life advice, thank you!!
Very intriguing perspective.
What we focus on, is what we will find.
Damn. Random RUclips comment just made me realise something about myself.
Amen
The death stare is lethal to people. It’s a great way to intimidate someone or show power without doing much.
I have a lot of guys ask me out and I know if they can’t look me in the eyes when they’re talking to me then they have no chance, lol 😅 some guys even comment about how me looking at them is intimidating.... but I think they are intimidated because their intentions are bad and I’m not having it
Facts that's what I do
@@madelineasmr926 Different people have different personalities and tolerance to emotions and intimidation. If someone is uncomfortable, its fine for them to be uncomfortable. Especially if they are introverted. This doesnt mean that they have bad intentions :) Honestly, as an introvert it is intimidating and makes me uncomfortable when i look someone in the eye, doesnt matter if its a family member or a stranger.
Not just individuals, you can control whole groups of people with your eyes. You’d be amazed at how 5 or 6 aggressive people will back down if you look each of them in they eye and just remain calm while their acting out. Insecure people are
unnerved by confidence.
@@madelineasmr926 Being a bit insecure in that situation might actually be a good sign of being just normal. Asking someone out IS hard and takes courage and being insecure usually means that they've gathered strength to do something that's unusual and hard for them, while people who's confident probably are asking people out all the time ...which is something to consider depending of what kind of guy you want to go out with.
Robert Downey Jr. was fabulous!! I hope I handle that situation in exactly that way, staying calm which is difficult for me!!
I don't think many people realize just how intelligent RDJ really is.
The dude is bright, like lightning.
I don't know how your could miss it. Not only is he sharp, but he's quick.
@@jnooney8225 The interviewer certainly did.
Yeah, I know. If others don't they live on another planet or they are dull in their understanding.
he learned a thing or two being tony stark
Yes he is he moved to England !!!
Something that works for me it being super clear “I really don’t wanna talk about that. Can we talk about something else?” - and I smile :)
Its good to be direct. Telling people how you feel is a good idea a lot of the time.
NEEEVER works with my father he just keeps on talkin even louder
Some ppl are tricky to deal with
@@mhad4308 I mean, he wants you to talk, right? How can this not work if it's up to you to talk or not?
@@chief8595 Direct DOESN'T work with passive aggressives. That's why they ARE passive aggressives. They simply DON'T CARE how you feel.
@@mhad4308 so did mine, as soon as I realized I had no opinion in the conversation I laugh and walked away laughing louder and louder then turning around and starring at him laughed my self walking away...
wow you could tell RDJ felt hurt in a way, his eyes...
looking at that reporter like "dude, really?"
he agrees to report the movie and dug into RDJ, so unprofessional.
Yeah exactly! You can see RDJ's eyes getting watery and his breathing gets faster too
He was probably just trying to hold himself back from becoming aggressive on camera, he was being disrespected and no body likes having their time wasted.
RDJ, a rare instance of recovery, healing and much success as a result. Worked hard, played hard, recovered hard, living with the most intensity, peace and prosperity sobriety can bring. Brilliant RDJ. My brilliant younger brother succumbed, he couldn’t make it out of the clutches of addiction.
Once I learned how to set and maintain boundaries, an overwhelming amount of anxiety disappeared almost immediately from my life. It's a game-changer.
@Account pending Great to hear. It's so important that I think they should find a way to teach it in school.
@@wolfmaster1557 I have to craft a response. Some RUclips subjects deserve a good response and this subject counts. I'll be back.
@@elsquibbs following
True
please explain this i have anxiety i would love to make disappear
RDJ is a great example of a man who screwed himself over, worked his ass off to overcome it, became a better person and earned the right to let his past stay there.
I think this is a great warning for other reporters; if the man wants to talk about his past, he will. If not, respect that and move on.
shut up!!!
@@TheJeffrey818 Well, since you asked nicely I guess I have no choice.
All hail j john, master of words.
@@TheJeffrey818
Feeling triggered, kid?
True, if you told someone 15 years ago that RDJ would turn things around AND become the highest paid actor of all time, making nearly half a billion dollars off one single character, people would think YOU were high
I've had interviews far more excruciating than this. So if one chooses to get butthurt and not answer questions then it becomes a Lose/Lose situation. He could have taken the High road and turned it into Win/Win, but he resorted to petty sarcasm.
Had a little spat with someone last night and walked out. Woke up feeling guilty, as I always do. Watched this and realised I was being deliberately ‘poked’ . Ceased to feel guilty and now happy to avoid said poker from now till eternity.
Thank you!
this comment resonates
Problem is interviewers in the UK cannot actually directly promote a movie, they have to ask the actor real questions. The actor maybe on a press tour but technically it is not allowed in the UK
Excellent
Good for you!
But what if it is "family ".......??
I'm very proud of RDJ, he acted like a real man should have.
That guy at the end with the gray hair, just staring in disappointment :)
+Calum Chrystal defeated.
so excited to see the old guy
got to the end and just busted up laughing.. that look! hahaha
Ikr? lol best part of this video...xD
New meme?
Robert stared at him so long without blinking that his eyes teared up
@unknowning unknown *Funny and original*
@unknowning unknown except for the fact that I was serious, it was messed up.
@unknowning unknown meh, I use it to confuse people.
@unknowning unknown incredibly original, never heard anything like it
@unknowning unknown lol that made me laugh though
"right....bye! :)" bro he is a legend!!
You can absolutely set standards to your boss. One time my boss called me, screaming on the other line about something I did. I interrupted and said call me back when you’re ready to have a rational conversation and told her I was hanging up. Whatever it was, was never brought up again.
RDJ 's confidence during the interview was amazing. How you can keep composure while someone is dissecting your lives most vulnerable moments is difficult. How he dislocates the interview by pointing out Krishnan Guru-Murthy's nervous foot and body language is just a masterclass in reading and controlling your environment.
I wonder if some of the psychology from SherlockH acting helped him out here. Then again he must know being a celebrity that click bait is always ready to attack. A really neat person
@@captaincrunch1707 One movie I must see! 🙂
He's an actor. He studies body movements. If a role calls for him to be visibly nervous, he has to know that that means. Actors are great observers of others. All RDJ did was go into director mode and call out his 'actor' for playing the role wrong.
Agree...he has a natural ability for quick replies. Watch the Jimmy Kimmel interview also. He was being a total prick but RDJ handled it great! Total Boss
@@Daeyel Don't call this masterful performance "all he did".
How to deal with “Haters”
Step 1. Understand the difference between haters and criticism.
No one seems to do this
Carryn Welde . Hmm, comes under the same hat in my book . Personally I hate haters and criticism...I grew up with it !!
@@lifeslessons9889 there is a real difference. Criticism points out actual flaws in a way that allows you to grow. Haters are just there to attack you they point out flaws, real or imagined, simply for the purpose of bringing you down.
Ok but when your a star and the criticism is about something you said years ago .... that’s not really relevant criticism and more like picking a fight.
depends what you consider hate..when trump supporters define the rest of us as " haters " you might want to consider that they are pro military..anti civil rights...anti environment etc...the rest of us are just trying to survive
“I don’t want to pry”, then the guy proceeds to pry. You could interrupt him while smiling and say to him immediately: “Great, I’m glad you’re not about to pry” lol.
OooooOOOF. That’s a *good* one.
That's so passive aggressive it's borderline aggressive and i love it
Keep 666 😀, if it fails, starover with mine !!.
People who lie will tell you what they won't do and then do it. As soon as they do that you know who you're dealing with.
Good line, point taken.
When people act up i dont even call them names I just reprimand them. "You do NOT talk to someone like that, do you understand!?"
Another thing to note is RDJ's gracious semantics. You picked up on this-- that by rhetorically asking "what are we doing here" he's really saying "what are you doing?". By simply changing the implicit "you" to an explicit "we", he shares some of the burden, some of the embarrassment, making himself appear more human and less eager to direct blame entirely on his interviewer, as this is hardly ever a productive tactic.
Oh, well said as well!
He's pointed out too so how is asking me this about the movie lol
Solid point. "We" in collaborative dialog or activity is a golden word. Note how often salespeople, politicians (same thing), and leaders use it.
Fookin hell with the mind reading.
Siri johnson, he also said “Are we promoting a movie?”
Robert Downey Jr what a gentleman. What an intelligent classy guy
😆
Tiny Turbo what’s so funny
@@moneygrabber6720 He was arrested and was addicted to drugs
@@leoskelton3471 was
@@wrstr that’s what he said
"Your foot is starting to jump a little bit, you better get to your next question."
Awesome.
Absolute alpha
@Bachelor Times Because its all you want to read/watch.
No eye contact needed a blind person could do it just as well... Staying calm is key. Collect your thoughts. Be quick to listen and slow to speak righteousness under control... If you are reading this I love you and bless you in the name of Jesus christ.
Would have preferred Cthulhu, or something cool. Definitely not the old cross and chain
The interviewer was way out of line. This was to promote a movie nothing else.
Richard yo Richard my name is Richard hello Richard
Rotch Potch hey Richards
@@tootart8858 hey Richards
Rotch Potch hey Richards
@@tootart8858 hey Richards
One thing I learned is sometimes people think you won’t speak up, someone told me once, make sure you get angry at everybody once just to let them know
Agreed
Yep. I'm the same way. Easy going but when someone steps out of line with me I let them them know. First a warning with my eyes then with my words. Most of the time he works. When it doesn't I decide to walk away. Not dealing with nonsense or disrespect. I keep it moving.
I agree J
I used to work In construction and I’d sort of rationalise it to myself and say things like ‘well he’s older than me’ or ‘he’s worked for the company longer than me’ or ‘he has more knowledge than me’ but really I’d have been better calling them out, then there’s the challenge of not being too agressive because if you rage out it can make things worse,
I find just calling people out calmly is usually enough
Depends on the trigger. If you notice people are doing it on purpose just to get a reaction from you they will enjoy you being angry cause they will feel they are in some control over you. You have to assess the situation. When it comes to bullying for example - yes, you better stand for yourself more agressively.
Yeah you got to be wise too, sometimes saying nothing is wiser, I tend to find I bide my time and wait for the right time to get angry or call someone out
RDJ knows exactly what he’s doing with both his body language, as well as his choice of words.
xrd he is actor
1. Hold strong steady eye contact.
2. Give them the benefit of the doubt.
3. Give a warning shot but go back to good nature.
4. Call it out.
-Don’t freak out.
5. Ask what are you doing?
-Maintain eye contact and wait for an answer.
6. Walk away.
And drink your orange juice. You deserved it.
7. Return video tapes
8. Obsess about target and plan brutal revenge
Great summary needed in the video description! :)
RDJ handled that beautifully. He warned the clown twice “I thought we were promoting a movie.” Third time, he got up and left.
“The clown”?
That’s Krishnan Gurumurthi!
@@avidsquarehead nah, I'm Indian and no hate here, but he was being annoying and trying to get a rise out of RDJ so yea, not cool.
@@avidsquareheadHe often behaves like an ignorant prick.
@avidsquarehead Entitled POS is a better description than clown.
It was so disingenuous at the end when he said, "I'm sorry."
The POS wasn't sorry at all, just regretted he was outplayed.
every interview ive seen him do hes a clown@@avidsquarehead
The camera man's look at him at the end is everything
I saw that too and you're right.
“What the hell, Jim…”
I paused on that moment so I could look at it for longer. LOL
Lol
I agree 100%! The look on his face was priceless!
I’ve always proceeded on the basis that I’m not automatically entitled to someone’s respect. I must earn it. It’s worked for me so far… 😊
8:28 Downey pats the guy on the shoulder and says "it's OK" like he's really saying "don't worry, you just blew an A-list interview douchebag". Perfect and full of class.
It's classy to be an egomaniac.
@ArcDevErik It is classy to hold your ego above some degenerate trying ti tear you down. It's not classy to just flash your ego for no reason
This interviewer has pissed off so many actors and directors
What's he called?
@@haeuth684 krishnan guru murthy or something that sounds like that
Paula Go thanks
@@haeuth684 no worries mate. his interview with richard ayoade is gold.
Paula Go just checked that interview out, actually I checked all of his interviews out my two favorites are richard ayoade and samuel l jackson, the best thing about these too is that they didn't even give him a chance to think of something and more importantly they were mostly smiling
Robert is by far more intelligent and experienced than that silly journalist . He handled it like a boss , clearly the coolest guy around Hollywood , not because of his roles lately , but because he managed to be himself while pretending to be someone else and following a script . His past belongs to him and nobody should judge him anymore or even make comments about it . "him who has no sins , shall throw the stone first"
There is nothing wrong with bringing the past of a celebrity up if it helps in finding something relevant to today. However, it is clear that this is not the type of thing to do during a movie promotion interview. Your supposed to talk about the movie. Perhaps bring open questions like: Do you feel anything in your personal life help you play the character, but nothing more.
@@stephanelaliberte1538 yeah, that's another level and more polite way to ask someone something so personal without giving him the feeling he is interrogated by a pushy journalist or just rude guy. Don't forget, Robert is a brilliant comedian, and any comedian is fearless into some level. So to make someone with that background and experience feel ''cornered'' means you crossed the line badly. Merry Christmas and a happy new year!!!!
George Isaak aye, especially when it is negotiated before the interview what the purpose of the interview is. RDJ arrived thinking it was going to be movie promotion questions and it wasn’t, he gave the grace that the youtuber explained, no reason to trust further, and he left.
@@6slade Like any intelligent man would do !!!!!
He's up there with Tom Hanks and sienfeld lmao
I SEEM like a nice person, mostly, but when anyone tries something I dont like, I can SEEM like a cold witch with angry green eyes!! It is better for all concerned that I let my boundaries be known..
I've been walked over my whole life simply because I'm an overly nice person. I figure it's about time for that to stop. Thank you so much for this video you broke it down very well!
Huge tip. Master the art off roasting people. You’d be surprised how many assholes stop walking on you when they realize you’ll burn them. Doesn’t work every situation of course but still
Feel you there. Remember, what you want matters as much as how you feel others needs matter. The worst that can happen if you speak up is less to deal with than the “what if” and regret that will run rampant through your stomach. It’s easier each time you do it.
Did it work ?
I'm generally a pretty nice guy, mostly because I have worked damn hard at it.
I try to be polite and respectful.
But if some bully mistakes that for weakness........well
usually doesn't workout too good for them, I can be really, really not nice.
P.S. Never been in trouble with the law either.
give 'em hell
He actually seems like Iron Man here, it’s so interesting how he embodies the character. The parallels between them are crazy
To be honest, I thought that's EXACTLY where the Interviewer was going to go with the question! I think he probably was going to go there, but he just completely fumbled the ball and it came across all wrong. Tony Stark and RDJ both have very similar character arcs, it's fantastic casting.
@@DAClarkism nahhh the interviewer was a scumbag lol he was coming from a negative place and it’s crystal clear. No confusion at all here about what went on especially with the help of the youtuber literally pointing everything out for you.
yeah he probably has some suits in his garage xD
Robert played Iron-Man only in the first movie. Then, he just started being himself.
@@DAClarkism You're not very decerning this interveiwer was a jerk who's only interest was digging up dirt. It wasn't going to go anywhere else.
07:30 rdj doesn't even say "what are *you* doing" , he says "what are *we* doing" which I think is less of an attack back at the interviewer
Yeah, it's like, if you want to tell me what you're trying to achieve, I can see if I can help you achieve it. But when krishnan cowardly refuses to engage on a collaborative level, it's now obvious that he wants to be enemies.
I think he was still giving him the benefit
Vital difference. The ‘we’ gives an opportunity for the other guy to backtrack.
Yup. It’s a great response. I used to say “What’s the big idea here?” but this is certainly simpler and probably better.
@@namedrop721 Exactly! And it was also ANOTHER warning. And that warning was making it very clear that he had a say in the participation. The interviewer also missed several facial and body language clues. He thought he was being clever while he was being a fool.
He RESPONDED & didn't REACT! Beautifully done. Im still wrking on this w/my parents whom I live w/now😭😱 I will be watching this many times! TYSM! ❤❤❤
This breakdown is so clear and concise. I love how you show and explain live examples in action. Fantastic work man
~ Glad you liked the analysis, Michael. :-)
Even the place where he points out the heavy breathing of RDJ
@@Charismaoncommand ey could you match the voice-over volume with the interview volume? or will the video get copyright claimed that way?
Couldn't have said it any better
@@scienceteam9254 Yeah I had to put on my headset to hear the weasel interviewer.
This isn't about arguments, this is about setting boundaries.
precisely
💯
He could have just replied "yes I'm free from alk all that ..." but didn't ... because the question was out of boundaries ...
I agree. I don't think this reporter was being passive-aggressive. I sensed he wanted to ask questions that were not appropriate for the movie junket. I think most reporters will push boundaries as part of their job and the nature of their work. It's fine if celebs choose not to answer.
Yep. RDJ protected his dignity and I appreciate the way he calmly exemplified setting emotional boundaries.
Perfect Kudos to Robert
I had a coworker constantly ask me how old i was ( I look younger then my age) to the point that she did it in front of an office full of people. It didn't really bother me except for the fact that she was insistant and went to that extreme. I was compassionate and patient till then. So finally I told her in front of all the people she cornered me in and responded casually
"Ill tell you how hold I am when you tell me how much you weigh" She never asked me again.
I'm 62
@@jenlyn60 great response👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾...so all she had to do was ask you your age in the RUclips comments🤷🏾♂️😂
You go girl.
Handled perfectly 👌
Kudoz to you too LOL
I have been stern with disrespectful people before...Sometimes it works,other times it dont
He flat out attacked Robert the whole time Robert handled it gracefully
Selena Gonzalez its not even questions
I really hope that Interviewer gets a savage beating the next time he try's to be little poeple.
The man doing the interviewing is a seasoned and competent interviewer. He was asking pertinent questions and questions that people wanted to hear about . He has been interviewing greater guys and gals than "Robert" and continues to glean answers from them, that in the frame of the interview are able to be asked. They are paid "Movie Stars" Who if they did something they know they are answerable to interviews ..;)
@Inside Man
The "reporter" was obviously asking inappropriate questions, that had nothing to do with the movie, or Robert's role in it. Robert clearly showed he does not want to talk about it, and yet, the "reporter" persisted, obviously trying to get Robert to embarrass himself and/or create a scene. That is not a professional reporter. That is a parasite, that does anything for a story.
It doesn't matter if the interviewed person is a "paid Movie Star". He/she is still a person, and deserves respect.
@@@Gyvulys Obviously "Robert" is in an interview and when Movie people are promoting a new release they do many interviews in a day, and are probably used to having many questions put to them and a "Reporter worth his Salt would not be of any use if he asked the same old questions ..;)Also to add to this some of the replies are a little to over reactive .For instance wishing for another Human being gets a savage beating is just being a plain TWAT!!! Never mind they can kiss the poster on the bedroom wall and dream ;)
During a job interview-- Personnel Mgr.: "What do you see as your greatest weaknesses?" Me: "I know I have weaknesses in some areas, but I don't see the benefit of taking you on a tour of them." I got the job.
I know I'm a bit late, but nice one!!!!
Great response!
@Scott Hammond - Outstanding reply. I have never done that for the "weakness" question, but I have done it on the "how much do you make currently?" question. I got the job also.
@@RogerThat1986 what do you mean, what do you say? 🤔
I always say I’m a perfectionist, and am hard on myself if I dont get it perfect
@@RogerThat1986 how would you answer that one please?
With my autism, explanations like these are gold. I just thought I understood it, but mostly these situations go too fast for me to pick up on all the details. Thank you for this explanation!
I feel relieved actually that I understand what you are saying and even more so when I even notice confirmation on things I wasn't sure of I'd saw them correctly.
I appreacite your comment
Indeed, as an Aspie, these videos are incredibly useful.
I have autism as well. This can help with my life too. It can help the all of us.
Leto85 well gets another explanation.. the interviewer is simply adopting a confrontational style typical of UK political interviews and applying it in the celebrity sphere And rdj is so used to anodyne us style softball questions he’s not able to handle it and throws his toys out of the pram because he’s a spoiled actor not a heavily tested politician ..
@@jsquire5pa That's very opinion based.
Much respect for Robert Downey Jr. He is a class act for his patience.
Holy shit, this just gave me a lot of respect towards Robert Downey Jr.
the way he worded those questions was a clear attempt to try and ruin rdj's career. what a weak attempt. rdj handled that super fantastically.
Guitarded How would his career be ruined?
Nabranes TwistyPuzzler he could’ve gone mad and say mean stuff but idk how it will ruin his career also
The interviewer was a troll, man. That interviewer did the same thing to other actors.
@@nabranestwistypuzzler7019 it's clearly baiting. if you can get a man who has a past with drugs and alcohol to get upset, he'll swear and say things he didn't mean to. and to go after the father. shame on that reporter.
@@nabranestwistypuzzler7019 RBJ, Right wing actor in hollywood with a drug problem, daddy issues and a short temper. Interviewer was really reaching
I'm just getting second hand embarrassment from the interviewer. I don't even know how he keeps talking with RDJ looking at him like that.
mintalicious spicy fresh I know, I couldn't even watch some parts
He probably felt obligated to continue, but it’s just so hard because he’s RDJ! I couldn’t do it!
probably has a narcissistic personality disorder. He’s obviously too toxic for this world
@@misakiotaku_ I doubt it, he wouldn’t have looked so nervous. He’s just a prick.
@@thedarkestpath7464 He’s really strange though- he literally persists as he’s going down by RDJ. He’s even on live, and whilst RDJ gives him those warning shots he ignores every single one. I shouldn’t assume what the guy has, but he is without a doubt toxic as hell.
It's funny that I came across this video when something similar happened to me just yesterday. I was offering someone my assistance on the phone, when he got rude and sarcastic. No need to speak that way. I've never spoken to him like that in all the years I've known him. I was in no mood to put up with that. And he had been rude to me on another occasion, at a gathering where it's not so easy to walk away without making it uncomfortable to everyone else in the room. But this time was different, so I said, "All right. I'll talk to you later" and hanged up the phone. Then I got on with what I needed to do at that moment.
Also, did you note Robert's eyes? I'm autistic and so can have problems reading people but even I could see the clear anger there. It was so obvious and yet the interviewer kept digging himself deeper. In the end Robert wound up being the one really in control of the situation.
They say eyes are the windows to the soul and it’s really true.
My sense of reading body language is pretty good, and I’ll tell you, you can find out exactly how someone feels by looking into their eyes. I don’t know what it is, but the eyes are a dead giveaway.
@@CLSGL That is why so many people get chills looking into the eyes of a sociopath, although, it has to do with more than just visual input but the entire sensory experience in the presence of someone else.
laeioun As an executive that speaks to other executives regularly, I can attest to that. It’s funny you described it as a “sensory experience” because from what I’ve been through, it’s more of a sensory deprivation chamber. A lot of them are completely void of emotion and compassion and it’s really easy to pick up.
What’s strange is that it’s actually very easy to trip up just because they never give you any subtle cues or reactions to what you tell them so you never know if you’re on the right track or not.
God bless you man. The interviewer hopefully learned a lesson from this
@@CLSGL My description of a sensory experience was not specific to sociopaths, I was only stating how we read based on more than just what we see.
There is nothing inherently wrong about people who are void of emotion, the chills I was describing come from our prey instinct of being watched by a predator. The immediate reaction to any threat is to freeze, and the ceasing of motion can make us feel cold; fear is associated with cold. Those who get chills in the presence of a sociopath only get them in the rare instances where the sociopath is not trying to fool them or where the person in question is not a true sociopath but simply reckless or cruel (perhaps a psychopath).
Executives represent power. Some psychopaths are drawn to such positions and they succeed because power is given to those who are willing to lower themselves to pick it up (which is much easier to do when you have no qualms about squashing others for your own gain coupled with above average intelligence).
The emotional void you perceive is not a lack of emotion within a sociopath but a lack of emotion about you within them, they still feel normal emotions, just without the ability to project said emotions onto others. Sociopaths are often formed out of trauma rather than born with the condition; it is one of the mind's strongest responses to trauma.
My father-in-law IS this person... Constantly trying to pick fights, looking for a rise, even going so far as to make multiple fake social media accounts to attack me, my wife, and my family. I responded a few times in the past, but I learned pretty quickly that it didn't matter what I said, it was the attention he was after, and he would do whatever it took to get it. When we stopped giving it to him, he lost all the power he had over us. RDJ demonstrates this perfectly, you don't owe anybody who treats you like this anything and you always have the power to walk away.
Glad you and your wife moved on.
Glad to hear you were able to separate from someone who treated your family poorly.
hi, I love your channel :) It's great to hear you and your wife could stop giving your precious attention to people who do not deserve it
The interviewer's name is Martin Bashir. He's a nasty piece of work. He's the guy who fed false papers and lied to Princess Diana, as well as fitting up Michael Jackson. He also kept some personal items belonging to a murdered schoolgirl which the mother had agreed to hand over to him for the purpose of forensic tests. He never handed them on for testing and failed to hand them back when requested. Claimed he had lost them. As for Princess Diana, when the authorities started investigating possible forging and fraud committed by him, he claimed mental illness and went into hiding. Like I said, he's a nasty piece of work.
I have an uncle like that. When he starts with that bullsh!t, I point over his shoulder and say, "Look over there!" He turns around to look, and when he turns back, I'm gone.
The d!ckhead falls for it every time! 🤣
you DO NOT mess with Tony Stark... I mean Iron Man,-I mean... Howard Potts....
IGnoTon you made my day
I can almost guarantee he's going to use Howard pots as an alias for hotels. People are going to be like "is RDJ staying here?" He'll probably look at you like "we don't have that name on our list"
Brilliant
@Riki R Z CHOI
If you don't say it is, people won't know that
You're not one of those Beatniks are you?
being in recovery myself, having someone mention your drug using days is something that definitely will send you into fight or flight especially if you didn't know it was going to be a topic of discussion
Get ready for more, even years later. I have one family member that will still ambush me out of the blue in front of total strangers at a social gathering, which proves what I've known for many years: Their problem is bigger than mine. Some people you can't eject entirely out of your life, but rest assured everyone around, including total strangers see through their little charade. Always keep your cool. Don't lower yourself to the level they're trying for. Otherwise , they get that rise they're looking for. Keep up the good work. . . one day at a time.
The Little "bye" at the end was so savage lol
lol
ikr! SAVAGE😂
I loved it! "Bye". Short, sweet, pure genius, and still so very polite.
Cooooold blooded!
Better yet was the parting shot when he said "You seemed, like, ok, but it's just getting a little Diane Sawyer-y here."
Lovely way to say 'Nothing against you, mate. You were just being an a…….e.'
Step one: Be Robert Downey Jr.
Goddamn im not that handsome:/
Damn thats so difficult
Step two: Be Tom Holland
Impossible
So now I have to go look up a Robert Downey junior tutorial
I have a coworker who kept trying to bait me. It's really satisfying to watch her stand there anticipating anger or some kind of reaction she can spin, and ultimately receive an apathetic, disinterested response. She finally gets that the game doesn't work and has started treating me more respectfully. I think of her like training a dog. I reward good behavior with positive attention. Has worked so far.
Ring a bell and get her to drool.
@Ignomeme Pavlov's theory it works on pretty much everyone, psychology 101
@Ignomeme If a dog craps on the carpet or otherwise destroys something in the house for attention, you don't reinforce that behavior with attention. If a coworker interrupts a conversation you are having with a colleague to ask what is wrong with your hair, and had also told you that you are boring and have no friends, you similarly don't reinforce that behavior with attention. I simply said, "I can't help you with that," pulled my attention away from her and continued my conversation with the colleague she interrupted. When this coworker is polite, I treat her with kindness and attention, because that is the behavior I want repeated.
Don't let them know they are affecting you. They will get bored with you .
Can she sit now?
I manage a hotel, and yeah, this sort of thing happens every few months.
Some guests will be upset and start recording as you're explaining something, hoping to get one over on you.
Choosing the right words in these moments takes practice. I used to get heated alongside the guest, then talk them down. It worked, but it left things feeling uneasy.
I now tell people that being recorded doesnt bother me, as I'm already on camera. I then express that I dont feel comfortable renting a room to them due to being hostile, as I have other guest's safety to look out for. I close with offering assitance on finding a different location for them to stay at. 9 times out of 10, they just walk away.
If it continues from there, I ask them to leave the property. If they don't, I call the non-emergency line for the police on speaker phone. Haven't had a person stay past that point. 😂
Nice! Congratulations! You’ve reached the highest level of emotional maturity. I learned who remains calm, is the one that remains control 😉
"That's the nice thing about opinions, you can change them." RDJ is a freakin savage lmao
all the interviewer was trying to do was to get to the real substance of the quote or for the guy to nail his colours to the mast..
looks like a culture clash - an englishman wanting to meaningfully get to know the man sat in front of him while the american just wants to remain all charming style and reveal no substance..
Such a Classy Response!
@@frankzappaspussy7362 It wasn't a "culture clash," because there are plenty of American journalists who pull the same trashy bait-and-switch tactic we saw here (i.e., asking for one kind of interview and then swapping to something intrusive and unwelcome in the hope of rustling up a journalism award). The thing is, even if you're correct, the fact remains that if RDJ is okay with seeming to lack "substance" to the English audience, that's entirely his prerogative to decide and risk to assume; it's not the interviewer's place to attempt to foil it with "meaningful" harassment when he doesn't have explicit permission to do so (as he clearly did not). The presumptuousness of the interviewer-whether or not his intentions were as you suggest-was obnoxious and, obviously, untenable, and he deserved to have his target fire back and then walk out on him.
🤣🤣🤣
@@thetimekeeper955 "harassment"
he just asked the guy questions about his already published statements - in order to clarify their meaning and significance.. that is one of the jobs of an interviewer - to help the audience better know understand the person being interviewed..
there's a lot of good ones but this my favorite charisma breakdown
Wow! Thanks!
This breakdown was really helpful in an interaction I had with a co-worker this past week. I managed to come out of it without losing my calm or saying anything I might regret. Thank You!
Saint Rexhardt good job! it ain't easy
RESPECT > LIKEABLE
^ ^ ^ BEST
So far, this is the only video, i watched thill the end.. welldone this video.
"That guy" is Krishnan Guru-Murthy, a British News Presenter who likes to get a rise out of people. In fact he wasn't interviewing him about the movie, if not trying to get some 'news' out of him for Channel 4...
RDJ's response was perfect.
Yeah I think that's the guy that did the Michael Jackson interview as well. Horrible excuse for a human and a pathetic excuse for a man. He's brown has an accent the only thing missing is him being a woman which he may already be we just don't know. The only reason he has a job or has ever gotten a job. For sure it's not based on his skills
@@Dunecoone It was Martin Bashir who did the Michael Jackson interview. He also falsified bank statements to get the interview with Princess Diana. Both he and Krishnan Guru-Murthy are notoriously untrustworthy, and utterly devoid of morals.
@UCq4oybD8CcQcFs5YF3SlL_A your father
His tie should have been a red flag.
KGM is a prick.
Everyone has made mistakes in life, but the past is the past. I can use my past to help someone get through life. I have no respect for someone that wants to use it to put me down.
I really respect RDJ for this interview. You can see he legitimately gets close to expressing some bad anxiety. It’s a human reaction. But he knows he’s in control of the situation, and walks out
I have to get better at that. When I’m feeling attacked like that, I start to lose control over my emotions.. I’m flooded with fight or flight. I hear a buzzing in my ears.. I have to work on being as confident and cool as my fave guy RDJ (aka Staff Sergeant Lincoln Osiris) .☺️
right on - there was a moment where the look on Downey's face had me thinking he was about to tear the interviewer apart, but he just politely removed himself - class and maturity.
Everytime I look into RDJ's eyes I feel like 'This man is so intelligent omg'.
Well I mean he is Ironman
8:50 The expression of the guy behind the cam is pure gold.
more like silver
+Heenry Douglas More like pure Iron
greenbeast1345 perfect allegory my friend
lol. yup
The look could easily be interpreted as a knowing look to the interviewer of shared frustration with the actors response. It depends on who he is. If he's part of the actor's entourage the look could more likely be as was suggested. But, if he's 'with' the interviewer, he's probably sharing a knowing look. He looks a lot like Max Clifford (publicist).
Years ago, a Utah HP officer stopped us, at 2:00 am and in the middle of nowhere, to say that we had been driving 95mph. Not true. Then he began trying to catch in lies. But we stayed calm. He kept escalating the situation until he'd gotten himself all worked up. He said, "We can take this to a whole 'nother level!" My husband said, "OK, give me a ticket and I'll go to court," knowing that the guy was implying something much worse or even violent. At the same time, I asked,"Why? Why do that?" He walked back to his vehicle and came back with a calm demeanor. My guess is that he trapped or provoked many people. I reported it to the court and to his supervisor but don't know what came of it. We paid the ticket and avoided that place from then on.
Robert Downey Jr is so goddamn smart
This was impressive
So many other people wouldve gotten upset or nervous immediatly
This puts a really really good example for everyone
honestly it's pretty easy when you're in a position of power. RD is a made actor, has huge success. This interviewer to him is 2, 3 steps below him, he can choose to interact with him however he pleased and not face any consequences. If anything I'm amazed by how considerate RD is, trying to make the interviewer behave but when ultimately it didn't work out he can do w/e he pleased and not having to worry about it.
In the end it's about how much power you have, there's 0 reason to be nervous if you fundimentally holds more power than the other party, and the social interaction and tricks can get you to a point, but in the end you need power to get away with almost anything
dewinmoonl I agree but we also always have the power to choose how we respond to what happens to us and that ultimately sets us apart from each other(quoting a Tony Robbins Book). I think it also has to do with experience. He's probably been in situations like that before or similar and he intuitively feels when something he does elicits a certain response out of someone.
Flaunting your power around is going to damage your public relation and image.
Just flaunting your power around doesn't cut it.
RDJ is brilliant! I was really impressed with how he handled himself being interviewed by this complete twit. Rob was being very polite and respectful and he gave this twit several chances, then said "Nah, I'm outta here." RDJ is a class act. The interviewer crossed the line when he brought up his drug issues; that would have made my blood boil too! I was like "Nah, don't go there!!" I can't stand passive-agressive people!! GTFO!!
am I the only person who thought rdj did seem nervous and uncomfortable?