Makes perfect sense. It is difficult at the time but when you get hurt, spend time healing, then start again. There will always be some hurt in true love. Don't let the hurt close you down. Remain open and loving and you will find your love.
For me, love is caring about someone, wanting to spend time with someone. It's having a best friend with which you do things you wouldn't do with anyone else. If you force anything, it'll break that relationship. If you do what you feel like you want to do, and the love is real for both parties, you don't feel like you're putting any real effort into the relationship. The relationship just exists and the both of you just do what you like the most.
I think if you are a pet owner, and, returning home after being out for the day, your heart leaps as your cat or dog rushes towards you with joy ... that is love! Maybe the love which people and their animals have for each other is the purest affection of all.
Love is someone who cares how you are feeling, and who like to be with you, who shares their time with you. This doesn't always have to be relationships, Caring for another person could be from a parent and or very close friends. Being attracted to someone who shares the same caring feelings and going that extra bonding is a bonus.Sometimes relationships don't need to be on the sexual experience, Also caring means knowing the person well enough you know when they need you and when to give them space.
Never be afraid to love. It's one of the most real things you get in life. Sometimes it's messy but the cost of not having it is even worse. And don't get so hung up on your past that you miss the present and sacrifice the future.
Love is tricky because possessive love is not really love. Unconditional love might be the purest form of love. But it is hard, if not impossible, not to have expectations when in love.
I understand what you are saying. I'm in old age now. I went through some rejections in my life. But i had to realise that people make choices , just as i do. Every one has preferences. Sometimes its hard to know whether someone feels the same , but it's best to get to know you first. Don't look outside of yourself for validation. I was a people pleaser, and i was bending over backwards wanting people to like me. What a waste of time and energy. Now that I'm old i can see it all. I love doing my own thing .
Love is such a strong feeling that you should of course take the risk you mentioned to get it. Life is in all categories of it like a rollercoaster with its ups and downs. That's just normal life. Just continue to try and find real ongoing love and one time you will find it and keep it. If you let your fear grow so much that you never try again then all that you have done is just to secure that you really will never find true eternal love because you stopped searching for it.
Love is someone who is always there for you no matter what. They don’t judge you and always listen to you. I can completely get why you’re scared to be in another relationship. Don’t be though as you will definitely find that person.
I continue to be amazed at the wisdom and introspection from many young folks these days on RUclips. What I can offer is that we all go through relationships when we are just starting out. I look at it as a training ground for when the real thing comes along. And trust me it will. You are a real catch for any girl or boy that comes along. Til then grieve when you have to and love life moving forward. Give yourself space to heal and grow. I wish you all the love you dream of. Be well.
I think most all the replies, reflect exactly what you are talking about. You are so lovable, that boy, girl, young, old... would love the hug you until you melted into our collective soul. A forever felling that is shared with select other-like souls. One can have many levels of love and one can emerge to another. I truly now think, that true love is a quantum event... really
There's no more patetic thougt than think that if one hurted you, the others one will too. Go ahead! Don't be scared of a scar! If you fell of a bike, and that let you a scar, will you stop just because you don't wanna take the risk to get another one? If you still trying, and learning of your mistakes and the mistakes of the others, You'll be better avoiding them.
Usually when I watch your videos, whatever comment I leave comes to me pretty easily. This time though I'm not sure what to say, probably because I feel the same way you do. If I were to give you any advice at all it would probably just be this: Don't focus too much on finding (or avoiding) love right now. It isn't something you can control, it just happens when it happens. You'll know what to do and how to feel when the time is right.
Your final comment about what "love" is, is 100% correct. These days the word is so overused it has lost its real meaning. Emotions are difficult to control so don't even try. Sometimes it's just infatuation. Real friendship is a good first step. I doubt many people have more than one true friend. In fact if they have just one they're truly blessed.
It's never going to feel "good", if, you keep taking yourself out of the question. People think love is "this" or "that" when it really isn't thinking about love.... !!!!
I agree love is "a sacred and cherished feeling ..." You put it perfectly right there. (I would not exclude physical touch however). The rest I would cosign in a heartbeat.
I agree with you completely..I have been so in love with someone who I thought I would grow old with.. they were my best friend and the person I wanted to do nothing and everything with... But we broke up.. we went in different directions... The divorce was final... That was 5 years ago... And I finally started looking for someone new this year and It did end up broken... So now I feel I am scared to open up ever again... My advice is if you think about them constantly if they are the first thought when you wake up then it's worth you trying to find out if can work... Routing for you bud... Follow your heart
I understand you wanting to protect yourself from being hurt, and I've done it myself. I do hope you'll be one of the lucky ones that finds a soul mate with whom who'll have a fairy-tale like relationship. I've been unlucky in love, with people only wanting hookups or relationships with people that turned out to be more interested in my money and being taken care of. I haven't dated years, since my last nightmare of a relationship, but you're just starting out in life and need to try your best to find love. It would be a shame for a guy like you to not have someone special.
Leon, Im glad you are talking about this. I love your definition of love!. I relate to it! To me love is wanting to know everything about your boyfriend (or gf), wanting to be with them and make dinner for them and turn them on to movies and music that mean a lot to you. It also means wanting to ravish them/be ravished by them, sniffing their hair and giving them a backrub,and, yes, being sexually attracted or fascinated by them! So cuddling leads to arousal, and sex means connecting in an unselfish way, making each other feel good, connecting your bodies, not using the other person to "get off"! Being there when they cry or theyre unhappy, or sick. Putting your arm around them in bed! Ive had three long and beautiful relationships, two ending in death. Currently I see a boy I am deeply in love with every couple of weeks. Im not sure how much he loves me, he comes over and we talk about almost anything, from ourselves, politics, our histories and his family, his band, past relationships, sex, and we watch movies, play records, smoke weed. I have to tell him again my feelings, because that heartache is always there. And I think about him all the time. For the past year. Just saying, I'M FUCKING SCARED, Leon, and not sure how to play my cards here. That I reveal my feelings and it spoils our friendship in some way. (We are both gay). Sorry this is such a long response, but here it is. And YOU Leon will want love again, just as I do Leon, you're loveable and a person of depth and desire! Maybe after a pause, but I can tell -- you will!
Leon... PLease make sure to love yourself before you try to love anyone else. I've been through a few relationships, and the common trait in them is this: The best relationships I had were during the times when I was in the best possible emotional/mental state about my own life. We are all imperfect, and very few of us have had our first relationship be a successful one. That being said...I have learned so much through my relationships...about myself, how I relate to others, and most importantly...how much I grew as an individual while in those relationships. Don't despair, bro. It will always hit you hardest when it's your first breakup...and it will leave you questioning many things. Just remember to never stop loving yourself, always looking for ways to improve yourself, and yes...learn to appreciate the little victories that will happen along the way. Didn't mean to preach a sermon, but I hope this advice will help you. Stay strong, and keep moving forward. Peace, and happiness to you...
I think it’s perfectly alright to feel this way. You’re coming out of a relationship which is still quite fresh in your mind. I’m not an expert in relationships myself but I think it’s probably best to take some time before getting into another one. You need to take time (not too much time though!) to mend your broken heart, look after your mental health and focus on other aspects of your life, so that you feel more ready to try another relationship. You never know, it might happen more naturally out of a good friendship with someone.😀
You can't let fear of what might happen in the future hold you back, buddy. All of life is a risk. Every decision we take in trying to move forward in anything is a risk. But we do it because the outcome, shutting ourselves in and putting up walls to try to protect ourselves and not really living just isn't worth it. I made that mistake for far too long and I'm currently working on correcting it. I think you have a good life ahead of you. Love, to me, is the feelings you have towards someone and the time you spend with them. Sex is great, yeah, and it is personally important to me, I could never be in a relationship that didn't involve sex, but at the same time I could never be in a "relationship" that was only sex; a relationship that was nothing but sex wouldn't be a relationship at all. Inevitably I want to connect with someone's soul. Don't be afraid to take chances. You have a good head on your shoulders and an above average value system and someone will be very lucky to find you someday.
All kinds of love. Doesn't necessarily mean a boyfriend or a girlfriend. I love my mom, dad,sister, nephews etc. Please don't deprive yourself from love of any kind. Don't be scared or afraid. If you do, you will miss out on so many opportunities. Get over it and be strong and move on. You'll never know if that person feels like you do if you shut them out.
Love is affection, respect, and a willingness to sacrifice. A relationship is a third intelligent being that helps lovers stabilized. The stuff that adds fuel to the fire is romance, and that's not love, but a sort of spice or catalyst. We sometimes extract comfort from the ones we love, but I'd rather feel worthy than make a mess.
Disagree. I know after ten minutes of meeting someone if there is an sexual attraction based on real connection. It is the most beautiful thing I can think of. It just gets deeper from there.
You will be in a relationship again probably many times before you find the right person you want to be with for the rest of your life. Everybody goes thru this.
Thats the million dollar question isn't it? For me love is that one person who I will stick with, through thick and thin, through the good and bad. A person who I will share the good and the bad with. Sure we will have disagreements, but we learn to overcome and grow from such challenges. and someday hold his hand until our hair turns grey and spend our time together until the last of our days until our final breath. This is love for me. I haven't found that person yet but I still hold on to hope that he exists.
St Thomas Aquinas said “To love is to will the good of another”. To expand that further, I Corinthians says, "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. None of those things are easy because as people, we are in general very self centered. You know you are in love (not in infatuation, not in lust, not in strong like) when you want what is best for the other person, even to your own detriment. Personally, I hold my emotional cards very close to my chest. I go through a very slow process of getting to know someone before I let them in closer/
There are many types of Love. 1. Love is sacrificial, of course it's going to hurt but we do it despite knowing we may experience pain. It's caring deeply for someone without expecting anything in return. If you're expecting something in return it's not love it's a transaction. 2. Love is a feeling, an obsesive deep infatuation, like an addiction. (Limerance) Passionat and intimate. 3. Love for your perants and your family ( familial love) . 4. Love for your friends, unconditional caring and giving without expectaion. ( platonic love.) 5. General love of all other people ( kindness, compassion)
What is love? It's an emotion which binds us to another member of the tribe, along with fear and joy, and every other emotion evolved on the evolutionary trail as a survival tactic. Emotions are powerful enough to override rationality and common sense. You will fall in love again whether you want to or not.
I'm so afraid as well.. but i am afraid of being hurt after being hurt so many times.. i dont want to open that part of me that can be taken advantage of... I feel lost and i feel unloved unliked... i'm depressed and empy. Be yourself.. hopefully you will find someone that makes you spin 24/7 and jump at everything to do and try together.
You can only appreciate true love by experiencing what you thought was love. There is no simple definition for love. But for me, its when you put the other person before anyone including yourself. 💙
@@40davegardner It is a reference to the great Peter Sellars film Being There, about a gardener named Chauncey, a simpleton mistaken for Chauncy Gardner. Everybody mistakes his gardening talk as metaphorical wisdom from a man named Gardner, not Chauncey THE gardener. Perhaps too esoteric a joke, but I liked it, and hope you check the movie out. All the best, sorry for the confusion 😀
Please Just don't worry About The people around you how they think of you Or How they look at you , you're talking about love Right,Love yourself because you Are the only one who Can change everything ☺️☺️
Hey. I agree 100% with your definition of love, because I feel the same way. Additionally, it would be a desire to have the other person in your life so much, that any bad habits that person has will totally be worth living with just to have that person around. If you had someone that truly loved you and not for the s*x part, there would be nothing you could do to mess things up. That person may be mad, but they would have a deep desire to come back and hug you and make things right. I don't know you but you really do seem like a really good person. A person someone would be lucky to have in their life. I'm sure you'll find someone. It just takes time. Hang in there. Be the person you want them to be to you. That energy will attract them.
i still go through this even just meeting others ,we are our worst judges . and others see us as wonderful . i work in a place where they say love you alot soo get this i dont say it y im not sure but this i think is common but im sure you will find a soulmate . trust me your not alone with those thoughts .but your young and have alot going for you
I think, no matter how old we are, we will always be afraid every time we try to start a new relationship. When we open our hearts and believe that other people have good intentions like us. I don't have the right answer for you, probably never will. But I think you're on a good track. Always be honest with yourself, even if you don't have the answers for many questions in life, yet. 🤗
Dear Leon, the hurt of accepting the impossibility of your last love hasn't healed yet. However, feeling are meant to be used, to be experienced. Not all emotion is happy. You cannot know happy, until you no longer fear unhappiness. Go forward bravely but do not "put all your cards on the table at once". It is not inauthentic to shield your heart. If you are asked about it explain you are still recovering from a major breakup. Then let them decide. Do not hide from your emotions, do not shut down from love. Be open to the idea that it will not be what you expect. I will not be from someone you thought possible. Let people surprise you. Bring a small detailed bunch of flowers when it goes well but do not go overboard. You are very wise but very young. I found true love at 34. It was a long wait. A lot of false starts but think what l would have missed. It was perfect and yet there were hiccups and speed bumps. Things came out of left field. I remained calm and correct like I Ching. I had 12 years. Two years later l began another love that lasted 20 years. ❤ live life, Unbreakable Stud
Great topic! For further consideration: you say you are afraid of entering into an another relationship because you are afraid of making mistakes. May I suggest that there is another way to look at it? Relationships are like any skill. Very few, if any, are going to be good at it their first time or first few times or, for some of us, ever. It may not be about not making mistakes but about learning. Learning what things are mistakes and how to address those things in a better manner. So that we can learn to deal with other people at an intimate level (meaning vulnerable). But without entering into those relationships and practicing how to deal with people while being vulnerable, it is a slow path to progress that ability. Maybe we should all be less afraid of making mistakes, getting our hearts broken, and disappointing others and more afraid of who we will become if we never learn how to express ourselves without hurting others. Which takes practice.
Love is may just a Mix of Hormons and other chemicals in our bodys. Only humans try to frame it in Words. Animals only feal it and deal with it. We ar mostly affraind from stuff we dont know, thats natural, specialy if the Emotion turm aus in a Condition we cant control. Hug and bless & enjoy exploring your nature.
Don't be afraid of love just be more cautious & less looking for perfection next time. Remember all people fall in & out of love. Also if you don't know loneliness & sorrow then the feelings of love won't be the same. Mostly be your own best friend & love yourself as no one else can ❤️
@@DavidLS1 No I'm not young lets say the first part of my life was traumatic and deeply lonely and then I found guys who wanted someone that had a certain charisma, who was like an older brother/lover, who taught them a lot, and so forth. One bf left me after five years, because he was straight and found a very beautiful girl to leave me for. He still says I taught him what love is. Yes I felt jealous, but my prior bf came back in a nick of time.
In my opinion, love is not something that can be explained. Love goes way deeper than any “explaination”. Love is something that can only be felt and experienced. There are no rules and/or guidelines that one can read as love is different for everyone. You can/will never love one person or thing the same as another person or thing. Each time you fall in love, it will be a different kind of love. Never try and chase what was once was as you will never find that exact feeling you had again. Love changes and evolves a person and each kind of love is different. I’m sure you will find love again, however, it will be a different kind of love than what you previously had. I know it’s easier said than done as “love” is a very scary and powerful thing. Keep your head up and let things run naturally.
Your idea of love is just about identical to mine. To me, almost, sex is enjoyable, but almost the least important part of a relationship. A true relationship in my mind is when you find your best friend. Not just a regular friend, but a friend that you enjoy being around so much and that you have so much in common that you want to spend time together, you want to spend the rest of your life together. You used a very valuable term in your description when you said your other half. When you find love, you find that person where you feel that your life isn’t complete without them in it. You don’t get sick of one another, but rather you cannot wait to get home at the end of the day to see them. To look into their eyes and see that expression of my gosh, how I missed you today. It’s about enjoying a good meal together and talking about each others day. What went good and what went bad for them. The things that may have went bad, how can you make them feel better about them. And yes, truly, it’s about cuddling next to one another on a couch and watching a good movie or listening to enjoyable music And just spending quality time together because you enjoy each other so much you just don’t want to be with anyone else. They are truly your other half, and your heart feels half empty without them in your life. They are also someone that you can trust with anything. Someone you have no secrets from. Someone you look for ways just to make them happy and make their day a little better each day. When you find joy and making them happy instead of concentrating on making yourself happy, you will know that you have found your partner, your best friend, and your true love. Sex is just an added benefit. It should not be forced on one another by either person, but only when you are in the mood to feel extra close and have the desire to make the other person feel amazing. Sometimes it isn’t even about making yourself feel good, but it is about making them feel good and bringing them happiness and joy. That to me is love. It is very hard to find, but when you do, you will know. You are a very handsome, sweet young man, and I know that someday again you will find that special someone that wants to be with you just as much as you want to be with them, and it will be magical again. Love is something never to take for granted. Once you find it, you should cherish every moment that you can spend together. But I know you will I can see it in your eyes and the way you express your feelings. They come from your heartand they are not just things that you make up. Thank you for posting this beautiful video.
A person to love just shows up one day say your soul mate when it happens it will be very difficult to f.. it up they will love you unconditionally. as you will love them. 😀
My ideal version of love is very similar it's just laying on a couch or in bed with your other half laying on their chest and watching some documentary about space or universe together and me cooking for them , it's only that I don't know how to cook
I guess many people misunderstand what love is, because they think they take some specific kind of feeling for love. But what is love really? Love is a decision! This decision can be unconscious, like for parents who do not make a conscious decision, but in most other cases it is a consious decision. It means: I will stick with you no matter what. I will be there for you - no matter what. I will go through everything with you - no matter what. At the end, it is a decision, to put somebody over yourself. BUT! If it's one-sided, it can and most likely will bleed you dry. That's why what makes true love is that this decision is made by both parties in the same relationship. It can be very painfull, to love somebody, who doesn't love you. That is why true love is very rare nowadays. Most relationships aren't based on love but are a kind of business. That is why people one day can unlove somebody, can loose what they believed to be love, what they wrongly have mistaken for love. I call it business, because they "love" for something they get in exchange. But love is a gift and it is the most beautiful things in life, when at least 2 ppl gift it to each others.
For me, love is definitely spending beutiful moments with a partner, cuddling and kissing mostly, but if i would have someone, i would take a really good care of them so they would feel happy and safe.... and so would i
Be careful my guy and also Love is the best you are lucky than i am cuz i am 16 and i have no friends only just my uncle , auntie and my grandmother thats all i have been trying to get outdoors for the longest while but i can't don't know whats holding me back but i know for sure that i will one day in the future .I really want at least 2,3or maybe 4 friends to be honest. Having fun in this life is the most important thing in the world and because i am so quiet around people nobody talks to me which is sad if ya really think about it its okay but at the same time when you are feeling down you really need to ask for help right if we can't help ourselves. And sometimes if we can help our selves we must go out there and help others that can't help themselves. But be careful cuz helping people sometimes gets you used in a positive and negative way carve your own part become a master of your soul, become a master of your mind. Great video Today and also i like the topic. My name is Shawn Winchester Bless up man
That is another nice video, Leon. You are right. We all tend to focus too much on sex. We do this at all ages. But, as you say, love is about many other things as well.
That's what I'm asking myself all the time too. I don't know what is considered love and what is not, my feelings are just so complicated that I'm often a bit lost. Maybe there is only one definition of love, maybe it can't be defined because it's something else for everyone? I don't know. But I've been thinking about this a lot recently.
I don't know why my comment didnt go through all I said is that I haven't found love yet or even a relationship because I'm still too young to want that just now. I'm not adverse to it, if it happens it will, but right now I'm not going to worry about it, But good luck to you
to me, love is an emotion i can have where i am deeply caring about someone. it does not include sex, for me. i am asexual. when i think about how most other people love, i see their sexual desires coming into this. that can complicate things for so many people.
@@johnryan3913 Asexual people are born asexual, just like how gay people are born gay and bisexual people are born bisexual. We aren't this way on purpose. Some people choose to be celibate for many reasons but that isn't the case for asexual people. Celibacy is a choice, asexuality isn't (btw I say we because like the op I am also asexual.) However asexuality is a spectrum so some ace people do experience some form of sexual attraction. For example there is a term called demisexual which means you only experience sexual attraction with people you have an emotional connection with. Hope this is helpful for your question about why op is asexual 😅
@@Frieswayneisthyname Thank you. I'm not sure I was born gay, but some combo of early experiences, family dynamics, and perhaps brain chemistry all factor in. Also you have mentioned a boyfriend. But like you said, there is a spectrum,! This has always been an interesting subject ("sexual anthropology") to me, since I was 13 or so. Therefore I really appreciate your response! Have a really good evening (if you are in the US)! 🏵️💐🌹
It makes sense to me, cause all my life, it was a struggle , i'm not into sex, but Love from Heart.... I understand you, and agree with what you say,.... Thanks, and Blessings from Canada You are a great guy ,....
Bro, if you can share your feelings on youtube for 1000s of people to see. You can do it for that one special person. Take this from a single guy who has never touched a girl. You can do whatever you set your mind to. Damn i just realised i got a bit much. Anyway...type shit
Why is everyone excluding sex? It is so different from when I was a kid and it was better understood. Sex should be generous and fun, WHEN YOU are ready, and It is a BIG part of love, requiring leap of fsith and trust.
This is a bit of a different one, but enjoyable, hope y'all like it ❤
Love is the best. When someone brings out the best of you, even (or especially) when you don’t think you’ve got anything good in you, that’s love.
That is an excellent and subtle observation!
@@Lucas-gm3bvYES you bring out the best in each other
Leon your content is getting more sophisticated and deeper.
Btw, Drink more water, check your iron level in the blood. You Look lil tired...i worry about your health...take care🌟
King Leon....You can't fail if you don't climb. But there's NO joy in living your life on the ground. 👍
Dear, please dont forget to love yourself first, then others.
Makes perfect sense. It is difficult at the time but when you get hurt, spend time healing, then start again. There will always be some hurt in true love. Don't let the hurt close you down. Remain open and loving and you will find your love.
I can relate so much
Love is feeling like you're home whenever your person is around❤
Better to have loved and lost that love rather to have never loved at all.
For me, love is caring about someone, wanting to spend time with someone. It's having a best friend with which you do things you wouldn't do with anyone else. If you force anything, it'll break that relationship. If you do what you feel like you want to do, and the love is real for both parties, you don't feel like you're putting any real effort into the relationship. The relationship just exists and the both of you just do what you like the most.
@@Ramon314 Ramon I love this comment!
I've only known love in ways that were unobtainable. I couldn't have the people I loved.
I'm 67...I can't love anyone....everyone says I don't love myself...but I think I just need all stars to align...may never happen....
I think if you are a pet owner, and, returning home after being out for the day, your heart leaps as your cat or dog rushes towards you with joy ... that is love! Maybe the love which people and their animals have for each other is the purest affection of all.
Tbh I need to find somone to love. I really do.
Love is someone who cares how you are feeling, and who like to be with you, who shares their time with you. This doesn't always have to be relationships, Caring for another person could be from a parent and or very close friends. Being attracted to someone who shares the same caring feelings and going that extra bonding is a bonus.Sometimes relationships don't need to be on the sexual experience, Also caring means knowing the person well enough you know when they need you and when to give them space.
Being IN LOVE is about relationships Taking sexual attraction out of it, to me, makes it a little tepid. I didn't like my family.
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me, no more.......................
Lol 😂 when I saw the title I immediately that of this
I knew I'd see this comment
@@EURClassicsbeen in a lot of songs going back to at least the 50s
@@EURClassicsyeah but how many times!?
Never be afraid to love. It's one of the most real things you get in life. Sometimes it's messy but the cost of not having it is even worse. And don't get so hung up on your past that you miss the present and sacrifice the future.
Give yourself time. I would urge you to NOT rush into a new relationship. Again, give yourself time.
growing is living , make mistakes,fall in love ,have a breakup,have a crush.Yes remembering your first love will be with you forever.
Love is tricky because possessive love is not really love. Unconditional love might be the purest form of love. But it is hard, if not impossible, not to have expectations when in love.
Baby don't hurt me... no more
WHAT IS LOVE 🎶🎶
I came here to do that 😂
baby, don't hurt me
don't hurt me
no more
Aww Leon I’m sorry we love you and you don’t have to be afraid we are here
I understand what you are saying. I'm in old age now. I went through some rejections in my life. But i had to realise that people make choices , just as i do. Every one has preferences. Sometimes its hard to know whether someone feels the same , but it's best to get to know you first. Don't look outside of yourself for validation. I was a people pleaser, and i was bending over backwards wanting people to like me. What a waste of time and energy. Now that I'm old i can see it all. I love doing my own thing .
I understand how you feel. I just found that my fear of falling in love was outweighed by my fear of not falling in love. Best of luck.
Love is such a strong feeling that you should of course take the risk you mentioned to get it. Life is in all categories of it like a rollercoaster with its ups and downs. That's just normal life. Just continue to try and find real ongoing love and one time you will find it and keep it. If you let your fear grow so much that you never try again then all that you have done is just to secure that you really will never find true eternal love because you stopped searching for it.
Love is someone who is always there for you no matter what. They don’t judge you and always listen to you.
I can completely get why you’re scared to be in another relationship. Don’t be though as you will definitely find that person.
Believe me!!!!! You will find out, when it is ❤️ Love. You not find Love--but Love will Find You !!!! Don’t overthink it. Greetings from Germany 🇩🇪
I continue to be amazed at the wisdom and introspection from many young folks these days on RUclips. What I can offer is that we all go through relationships when we are just starting out. I look at it as a training ground for when the real thing comes along. And trust me it will. You are a real catch for any girl or boy that comes along. Til then grieve when you have to and love life moving forward. Give yourself space to heal and grow. I wish you all the love you dream of. Be well.
I think most all the replies, reflect exactly what you are talking about. You are so lovable, that boy, girl, young, old... would love the hug you until you melted into our collective soul. A forever felling that is shared with select other-like souls. One can have many levels of love and one can emerge to another. I truly now think, that true love is a quantum event... really
There's no more patetic thougt than think that if one hurted you, the others one will too. Go ahead! Don't be scared of a scar! If you fell of a bike, and that let you a scar, will you stop just because you don't wanna take the risk to get another one? If you still trying, and learning of your mistakes and the mistakes of the others, You'll be better avoiding them.
Usually when I watch your videos, whatever comment I leave comes to me pretty easily. This time though I'm not sure what to say, probably because I feel the same way you do. If I were to give you any advice at all it would probably just be this: Don't focus too much on finding (or avoiding) love right now. It isn't something you can control, it just happens when it happens. You'll know what to do and how to feel when the time is right.
Your final comment about what "love" is, is 100% correct. These days the word is so overused it has lost its real meaning. Emotions are difficult to control so don't even try. Sometimes it's just infatuation. Real friendship is a good first step. I doubt many people have more than one true friend. In fact if they have just one they're truly blessed.
Ohhhh the fear of feeling that terrible pain again , break-ups / unrequited love etc is quite normal…… just give yourself time.
It's never going to feel "good", if, you keep taking yourself out of the question. People think love is "this" or "that" when it really isn't thinking about love.... !!!!
I agree love is "a sacred and cherished feeling ..." You put it perfectly right there. (I would not exclude physical touch however). The rest I would cosign in a heartbeat.
I agree with you completely..I have been so in love with someone who I thought I would grow old with.. they were my best friend and the person I wanted to do nothing and everything with... But we broke up.. we went in different directions... The divorce was final... That was 5 years ago... And I finally started looking for someone new this year and It did end up broken... So now I feel I am scared to open up ever again... My advice is if you think about them constantly if they are the first thought when you wake up then it's worth you trying to find out if can work... Routing for you bud... Follow your heart
Same here. Too scared I might hurt someone again...
❤
Dont. ❤
I understand you wanting to protect yourself from being hurt, and I've done it myself. I do hope you'll be one of the lucky ones that finds a soul mate with whom who'll have a fairy-tale like relationship. I've been unlucky in love, with people only wanting hookups or relationships with people that turned out to be more interested in my money and being taken care of. I haven't dated years, since my last nightmare of a relationship, but you're just starting out in life and need to try your best to find love. It would be a shame for a guy like you to not have someone special.
Leon, Im glad you are talking about this. I love your definition of love!. I relate to it! To me love is wanting to know everything about your boyfriend (or gf), wanting to be with them and make dinner for them and turn them on to movies and music that mean a lot to you. It also means wanting to ravish them/be ravished by them, sniffing their hair and giving them a backrub,and, yes, being sexually attracted or fascinated by them! So cuddling leads to arousal, and sex means connecting in an unselfish way, making each other feel good, connecting your bodies, not using the other person to "get off"! Being there when they cry or theyre unhappy, or sick. Putting your arm around them in bed!
Ive had three long and beautiful relationships, two ending in death. Currently I see a boy I am deeply in love with every couple of weeks. Im not sure how much he loves me, he comes over and we talk about almost anything, from ourselves, politics, our histories and his family, his band, past relationships, sex, and we watch movies, play records, smoke weed. I have to tell him again my feelings, because that heartache is always there. And I think about him all the time. For the past year. Just saying, I'M FUCKING SCARED, Leon, and not sure how to play my cards here. That I reveal my feelings and it spoils our friendship in some way. (We are both gay). Sorry this is such a long response, but here it is.
And YOU Leon will want love again, just as I do Leon, you're loveable and a person of depth and desire! Maybe after a pause, but I can tell -- you will!
What is love? Baby don't hurt me. Don't hurt me no more.
Leon ... sometimes, especially when you had hurtfull expieriences some people tend to overthink about emotions. You will outlive that after some time.
Leon... PLease make sure to love yourself before you try to love anyone else. I've been through a few relationships, and the common trait in them is this: The best relationships I had were during the times when I was in the best possible emotional/mental state about my own life. We are all imperfect, and very few of us have had our first relationship be a successful one. That being said...I have learned so much through my relationships...about myself, how I relate to others, and most importantly...how much I grew as an individual while in those relationships. Don't despair, bro. It will always hit you hardest when it's your first breakup...and it will leave you questioning many things. Just remember to never stop loving yourself, always looking for ways to improve yourself, and yes...learn to appreciate the little victories that will happen along the way. Didn't mean to preach a sermon, but I hope this advice will help you. Stay strong, and keep moving forward. Peace, and happiness to you...
I can't say to try to move on but don't rush yourself as i can't.
I think it’s perfectly alright to feel this way. You’re coming out of a relationship which is still quite fresh in your mind. I’m not an expert in relationships myself but I think it’s probably best to take some time before getting into another one. You need to take time (not too much time though!) to mend your broken heart, look after your mental health and focus on other aspects of your life, so that you feel more ready to try another relationship. You never know, it might happen more naturally out of a good friendship with someone.😀
You can't let fear of what might happen in the future hold you back, buddy. All of life is a risk. Every decision we take in trying to move forward in anything is a risk. But we do it because the outcome, shutting ourselves in and putting up walls to try to protect ourselves and not really living just isn't worth it. I made that mistake for far too long and I'm currently working on correcting it. I think you have a good life ahead of you. Love, to me, is the feelings you have towards someone and the time you spend with them. Sex is great, yeah, and it is personally important to me, I could never be in a relationship that didn't involve sex, but at the same time I could never be in a "relationship" that was only sex; a relationship that was nothing but sex wouldn't be a relationship at all. Inevitably I want to connect with someone's soul. Don't be afraid to take chances. You have a good head on your shoulders and an above average value system and someone will be very lucky to find you someday.
I swear you're the most huggable person I have ever seen. Hope ya figure it out home slice
All kinds of love. Doesn't necessarily mean a boyfriend or a girlfriend. I love my mom, dad,sister, nephews etc. Please don't deprive yourself from love of any kind. Don't be scared or afraid. If you do, you will miss out on so many opportunities. Get over it and be strong and move on. You'll never know if that person feels like you do if you shut them out.
Not the same. Nobody's afraid to love their pet or their mother. It is adult, erotic love that requires that leap of faith.
Love is affection, respect, and a willingness to sacrifice. A relationship is a third intelligent being that helps lovers stabilized. The stuff that adds fuel to the fire is romance, and that's not love, but a sort of spice or catalyst. We sometimes extract comfort from the ones we love, but I'd rather feel worthy than make a mess.
Disagree. I know after ten minutes of meeting someone if there is an sexual attraction based on real connection. It is the most beautiful thing I can think of. It just gets deeper from there.
And what do you mean make a mess?
You will be in a relationship again probably many times before you find the right person you want to be with for the rest of your life. Everybody goes thru this.
Thats the million dollar question isn't it?
For me love is that one person who I will stick with, through thick and thin, through the good and bad. A person who I will share the good and the bad with. Sure we will have disagreements, but we learn to overcome and grow from such challenges. and someday hold his hand until our hair turns grey and spend our time together until the last of our days until our final breath. This is love for me.
I haven't found that person yet but I still hold on to hope that he exists.
St Thomas Aquinas said “To love is to will the good of another”. To expand that further, I Corinthians says, "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
None of those things are easy because as people, we are in general very self centered. You know you are in love (not in infatuation, not in lust, not in strong like) when you want what is best for the other person, even to your own detriment.
Personally, I hold my emotional cards very close to my chest. I go through a very slow process of getting to know someone before I let them in closer/
I feel the same way brother. I have big time trust issues.
people say Love is a dangerous game.
There are many types of Love. 1. Love is sacrificial, of course it's going to hurt but we do it despite knowing we may experience pain. It's caring deeply for someone without expecting anything in return. If you're expecting something in return it's not love it's a transaction.
2. Love is a feeling, an obsesive deep infatuation, like an addiction. (Limerance) Passionat and intimate.
3. Love for your perants and your family ( familial love) .
4. Love for your friends, unconditional caring and giving without expectaion. ( platonic love.)
5. General love of all other people ( kindness, compassion)
Great comment!
What is love? It's an emotion which binds us to another member of the tribe, along with fear and joy, and every other emotion evolved on the evolutionary trail as a survival tactic. Emotions are powerful enough to override rationality and common sense. You will fall in love again whether you want to or not.
I'm so afraid as well.. but i am afraid of being hurt after being hurt so many times.. i dont want to open that part of me that can be taken advantage of... I feel lost and i feel unloved unliked... i'm depressed and empy.
Be yourself.. hopefully you will find someone that makes you spin 24/7 and jump at everything to do and try together.
You can only appreciate true love by experiencing what you thought was love. There is no simple definition for love. But for me, its when you put the other person before anyone including yourself. 💙
Being a gardener must give you a lot of insight into the true power of love 🤔(cf. "Being There")
@@johnryan3913 what?
@@40davegardner It is a reference to the great Peter Sellars film Being There, about a gardener named Chauncey, a simpleton mistaken for Chauncy Gardner. Everybody mistakes his gardening talk as metaphorical wisdom from a man named Gardner, not Chauncey THE gardener. Perhaps too esoteric a joke, but I liked it, and hope you check the movie out. All the best, sorry for the confusion 😀
Please Just don't worry About The people around you how they think of you Or How they look at you , you're talking about love Right,Love yourself because you Are the only one who Can change everything ☺️☺️
Love it Love 🤷♂️
Hey. I agree 100% with your definition of love, because I feel the same way. Additionally, it would be a desire to have the other person in your life so much, that any bad habits that person has will totally be worth living with just to have that person around. If you had someone that truly loved you and not for the s*x part, there would be nothing you could do to mess things up. That person may be mad, but they would have a deep desire to come back and hug you and make things right. I don't know you but you really do seem like a really good person. A person someone would be lucky to have in their life. I'm sure you'll find someone. It just takes time. Hang in there. Be the person you want them to be to you. That energy will attract them.
The sex part is a big part of it! That's why you wake up thinking about them
i still go through this even just meeting others ,we are our worst judges . and others see us as wonderful . i work in a place where they say love you alot soo get this i dont say it y im not sure but this i think is common but im sure you will find a soulmate . trust me your not alone with those thoughts .but your young and have alot going for you
You’ll know when you fall in love Leon. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself, just take each day as it comes and love will find you 👏
I think, no matter how old we are, we will always be afraid every time we try to start a new relationship. When we open our hearts and believe that other people have good intentions like us. I don't have the right answer for you, probably never will. But I think you're on a good track. Always be honest with yourself, even if you don't have the answers for many questions in life, yet. 🤗
No not a mix of hormones. That's just neuroscience, and it's boring and reductive
There is no love. Just interest.
Dear Leon, the hurt of accepting the impossibility of your last love hasn't healed yet. However, feeling are meant to be used, to be experienced. Not all emotion is happy. You cannot know happy, until you no longer fear unhappiness. Go forward bravely but do not "put all your cards on the table at once". It is not inauthentic to shield your heart. If you are asked about it explain you are still recovering from a major breakup. Then let them decide. Do not hide from your emotions, do not shut down from love. Be open to the idea that it will not be what you expect. I will not be from someone you thought possible. Let people surprise you. Bring a small detailed bunch of flowers when it goes well but do not go overboard. You are very wise but very young. I found true love at 34. It was a long wait. A lot of false starts but think what l would have missed. It was perfect and yet there were hiccups and speed bumps. Things came out of left field. I remained calm and correct like I Ching. I had 12 years. Two years later l began another love that lasted 20 years. ❤ live life, Unbreakable Stud
Aww Leon we love you as much you’re very warming welcome too I love your video everyday ❤❤
Great topic! For further consideration: you say you are afraid of entering into an another relationship because you are afraid of making mistakes. May I suggest that there is another way to look at it? Relationships are like any skill. Very few, if any, are going to be good at it their first time or first few times or, for some of us, ever. It may not be about not making mistakes but about learning. Learning what things are mistakes and how to address those things in a better manner. So that we can learn to deal with other people at an intimate level (meaning vulnerable). But without entering into those relationships and practicing how to deal with people while being vulnerable, it is a slow path to progress that ability. Maybe we should all be less afraid of making mistakes, getting our hearts broken, and disappointing others and more afraid of who we will become if we never learn how to express ourselves without hurting others. Which takes practice.
Love is may just a Mix of Hormons and other chemicals in our bodys. Only humans try to frame it in Words. Animals only feal it and deal with it. We ar mostly affraind from stuff we dont know, thats natural, specialy if the Emotion turm aus in a Condition we cant control. Hug and bless & enjoy exploring your nature.
Oh turning it into neuroscience just ruins it. Animals do not feel it. They feel the need to reproduce. We are afraid of rejection, insecurity, etc
Love is not about hormones. That is reductive, and ruins and oversimplifies it
Don't be afraid of love just be more cautious & less looking for perfection next time. Remember all people fall in & out of love. Also if you don't know loneliness & sorrow then the feelings of love won't be the same. Mostly be your own best friend & love yourself as no one else can ❤️
I can relate to this alot as well
Time heals all wounds. You'll fall in love and you'll fall out of love with many more people.
Never fallen out of love myself.
@@johnryan3913 You're either very young or very lucky.
@@DavidLS1 No I'm not young lets say the first part of my life was traumatic and deeply lonely and then I found guys who wanted someone that had a certain charisma, who was like an older brother/lover, who taught them a lot, and so forth. One bf left me after five years, because he was straight and found a very beautiful girl to leave me for. He still says I taught him what love is. Yes I felt jealous, but my prior bf came back in a nick of time.
In my opinion, love is not something that can be explained. Love goes way deeper than any “explaination”. Love is something that can only be felt and experienced. There are no rules and/or guidelines that one can read as love is different for everyone. You can/will never love one person or thing the same as another person or thing. Each time you fall in love, it will be a different kind of love. Never try and chase what was once was as you will never find that exact feeling you had again. Love changes and evolves a person and each kind of love is different. I’m sure you will find love again, however, it will be a different kind of love than what you previously had. I know it’s easier said than done as “love” is a very scary and powerful thing. Keep your head up and let things run naturally.
Love is * hugs * 😁♥️
Yeah if you're five y.o.
what is love? baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more.
Your idea of love is just about identical to mine. To me, almost, sex is enjoyable, but almost the least important part of a relationship. A true relationship in my mind is when you find your best friend. Not just a regular friend, but a friend that you enjoy being around so much and that you have so much in common that you want to spend time together, you want to spend the rest of your life together. You used a very valuable term in your description when you said your other half. When you find love, you find that person where you feel that your life isn’t complete without them in it. You don’t get sick of one another, but rather you cannot wait to get home at the end of the day to see them. To look into their eyes and see that expression of my gosh, how I missed you today. It’s about enjoying a good meal together and talking about each others day. What went good and what went bad for them. The things that may have went bad, how can you make them feel better about them. And yes, truly, it’s about cuddling next to one another on a couch and watching a good movie or listening to enjoyable music And just spending quality time together because you enjoy each other so much you just don’t want to be with anyone else. They are truly your other half, and your heart feels half empty without them in your life. They are also someone that you can trust with anything. Someone you have no secrets from. Someone you look for ways just to make them happy and make their day a little better each day. When you find joy and making them happy instead of concentrating on making yourself happy, you will know that you have found your partner, your best friend, and your true love. Sex is just an added benefit. It should not be forced on one another by either person, but only when you are in the mood to feel extra close and have the desire to make the other person feel amazing. Sometimes it isn’t even about making yourself feel good, but it is about making them feel good and bringing them happiness and joy. That to me is love. It is very hard to find, but when you do, you will know. You are a very handsome, sweet young man, and I know that someday again you will find that special someone that wants to be with you just as much as you want to be with them, and it will be magical again. Love is something never to take for granted. Once you find it, you should cherish every moment that you can spend together. But I know you will I can see it in your eyes and the way you express your feelings. They come from your heartand they are not just things that you make up. Thank you for posting this beautiful video.
slow your roll and love will come. Don't rush and connections form
A person to love just shows up one day say your soul mate when it happens it will be very difficult to f.. it up they will love you unconditionally. as you will love them. 😀
My ideal version of love is very similar it's just laying on a couch or in bed with your other half laying on their chest and watching some documentary about space or universe together and me cooking for them , it's only that I don't know how to cook
I guess many people misunderstand what love is, because they think they take some specific kind of feeling for love. But what is love really? Love is a decision! This decision can be unconscious, like for parents who do not make a conscious decision, but in most other cases it is a consious decision. It means: I will stick with you no matter what. I will be there for you - no matter what. I will go through everything with you - no matter what. At the end, it is a decision, to put somebody over yourself.
BUT! If it's one-sided, it can and most likely will bleed you dry. That's why what makes true love is that this decision is made by both parties in the same relationship. It can be very painfull, to love somebody, who doesn't love you. That is why true love is very rare nowadays. Most relationships aren't based on love but are a kind of business. That is why people one day can unlove somebody, can loose what they believed to be love, what they wrongly have mistaken for love. I call it business, because they "love" for something they get in exchange. But love is a gift and it is the most beautiful things in life, when at least 2 ppl gift it to each others.
For me, love is definitely spending beutiful moments with a partner, cuddling and kissing mostly, but if i would have someone, i would take a really good care of them so they would feel happy and safe.... and so would i
Studdy, don't hurt me. Don't hurt me, no more.......................
You’re still so young, and many people can have several relationships before they’re happy. It’s a part of life, not the end of life.
God is love and His love is perfect ❤
Isn't the pain wonderful Leon? You felt something. Feeling something is wonderful. (PS. Marry the one who makes you laugh.)
Be careful my guy and also
Love is the best you are lucky than i am cuz i am 16 and i have no friends only just my uncle , auntie and my grandmother thats all i have been trying to get outdoors for the longest while but i can't don't know whats holding me back but i know for sure that i will one day in the future .I really want at least 2,3or maybe 4 friends to be honest. Having fun in this life is the most important thing in the world and because i am so quiet around people nobody talks to me which is sad if ya really think about it its okay but at the same time when you are feeling down you really need to ask for help right if we can't help ourselves. And sometimes if we can help our selves we must go out there and help others that can't help themselves. But be careful cuz helping people sometimes gets you used in a positive and negative way carve your own part become a master of your soul, become a master of your mind.
Great video Today and also i like the topic.
My name is Shawn Winchester
Bless up man
That is another nice video, Leon. You are right. We all tend to focus too much on sex. We do this at all ages. But, as you say, love is about many other things as well.
And by interest i mean personal benefit.
That's what I'm asking myself all the time too. I don't know what is considered love and what is not, my feelings are just so complicated that I'm often a bit lost. Maybe there is only one definition of love, maybe it can't be defined because it's something else for everyone? I don't know. But I've been thinking about this a lot recently.
I don't know why my comment didnt go through all I said is that I haven't found love yet or even a relationship because I'm still too young to want that just now. I'm not adverse to it, if it happens it will, but right now I'm not going to worry about it, But good luck to you
Good to see you again!
@@johnryan3913 Good to see you too . Have a fantastic weekend and don't worry too much because you are loved by many
@@theart8039 Wow, thanks for that! I wish you the very best and hope you don't get deleted! Love the art btw 👁️
Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me no more
Edit : FUCK SOMEONE ALREADY WROTE THAT AUGHH
Look up the song, little blue man.
What's the old saying, "It''s better to have fallen in love and failed than by never falling in love at all" It's not fun. I know personally.
to me, love is an emotion i can have where i am deeply caring about someone. it does not include sex, for me. i am asexual. when i think about how most other people love, i see their sexual desires coming into this. that can complicate things for so many people.
Why are you asexual? I need somebody to fuse with, to take that risk and reveal our most vulnerable selves.
@@johnryan3913 Asexual people are born asexual, just like how gay people are born gay and bisexual people are born bisexual. We aren't this way on purpose. Some people choose to be celibate for many reasons but that isn't the case for asexual people. Celibacy is a choice, asexuality isn't (btw I say we because like the op I am also asexual.) However asexuality is a spectrum so some ace people do experience some form of sexual attraction. For example there is a term called demisexual which means you only experience sexual attraction with people you have an emotional connection with. Hope this is helpful for your question about why op is asexual 😅
@@Frieswayneisthyname Thank you. I'm not sure I was born gay, but some combo of early experiences, family dynamics, and perhaps brain chemistry all factor in. Also you have mentioned a boyfriend. But like you said, there is a spectrum,! This has always been an interesting subject ("sexual anthropology") to me, since I was 13 or so. Therefore I really appreciate your response! Have a really good evening (if you are in the US)! 🏵️💐🌹
@@johnryan3913 You too! And you're welcome, I'm happy to help :)
It makes sense to me, cause all my life, it was a struggle , i'm not into sex, but Love from Heart.... I understand you, and agree with what you say,.... Thanks, and Blessings from Canada You are a great guy ,....
Bro, if you can share your feelings on youtube for 1000s of people to see. You can do it for that one special person. Take this from a single guy who has never touched a girl. You can do whatever you set your mind to. Damn i just realised i got a bit much. Anyway...type shit
Type shit 🤞
Why is everyone excluding sex? It is so different from when I was a kid and it was better understood. Sex should be generous and fun, WHEN YOU are ready, and It is a BIG part of love, requiring leap of fsith and trust.
❤LOVE❤LOVE🤗🧑🤝🧔👍✌️
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me, no more
you've mentioned reqium a few times now, but is it exactly?
Leon if you think you're going to fail you've already failed. St. Pauls definition of love, he nails it. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
No only if the Bible is you book about sex. How narrow
I LOVE YOU, LEON.