I'm a college professor. Recently, I started telling the students at the beginning of the semester, "I will not correspond with your parents. Your education, as an adult, is your business."
My 21-year old son, in college, recently told me a story…a very attractive young lady whom he was aquatinted with made some pretty forward advances on him. He had red flags; and begged off. Understand, the young lady was not only attractive, but came from a wealthy family. My son is a proud, complete Leftist. Other friends informed him that the young lady was a die-hard Trump supporter. He subsequently broke it off. I think he has grown up well.
I think he did. As a 42 years old man, i find this stories very hopeful for the future. It doesn't matter how attractive somone is, if that woman is a consevative i wouldn't date her let alone a trump supporter .
My 21 year old daughter has been with the same guy for a couple of years now. I rarely discuss politics with my kids unless they open the topic for discussion, but my daughter started kinda sorta spouting off things you might hear from the Trump base and my red flags went up. I'm pretty sure her guy is a Trump supporter. The conflict I am having is - the guy is really sweet to my daughter. They respect and love each other. I honestly don't know how the family gatherings will go but I will have to work extra hard to bite my lip for certain discussions.
CNN stopped giving a crap about honesty a while ago, any network that would have Scott Jennings on as a regular contributor doesn't give a damn about honesty
As a retired librarian I would have parents come to the library with their son or daughter (more often, their son), who was a junior or senior in high school. The mom would say to me (with their child standing right next to them), WE are here to get information for OUR senior project (or whatever the assignment was)! The teen would stand there silently, but seemingly not uncomfortable - likely because this scenario was typical. I would direct my questions to the teen. And before they could begin to try to answer, the mom would immediately answer my all of my questions. It was beyond outrageous and inappropriate, yet tragically, not an uncommon experience! Love you women! Caw! Caw!
A wise woman once told me that your children are watching you and how you make your way through the world. That’s showing them the reality of the world. Be truly present when you are there with them and let go of the guilt.
"Mind your own business" is a way to live, and it's a great life! Looking out and helping, people in obvious need is another thing. Love you ladies, it's been a full year of giggles with you! Happy New Year 🥳🥳🥳
🚁You've nailed it here. I was a university manager in our communications office. I had a parent call to ask if their child could "graduate with their friends" despite their child not having completed their degree requirements. 🤦🏻🤦🏻🤦🏻 I soon learned a tiering system for helicopter parents. The ones who threatened our physical safety were called "Blackhawks." [caw-caw! love you, Pumps!] I am now a college instructor and you nailed it. Not only does a parent contacting an instructor NOT help, but we are legally NOT allowed to communicate about an adult student's academic progress with any third-party requester ...and that includes the students' parents. Parents: please don't do this.
I used to work in a Registrar's Office at an Ivy League University. We were a GRADUATE school and had mothers calling about ridiculous issues. Because of FERPA, we weren't allowed to disclose grades, etc. But one would call EVERY DAY trying to find out the grade from a particular professor. The only exception to this helicoptering might be children who are autistic or handicapped and really need the help. But usually that is arranged ahead of time with administration, not 'off-the-cuff.'
It's crazy out there! My daughter tells me that some students at her university are really having a difficult time coping. Resiliency, what is that? Their levels of anxiety are sky high , making simple decisions are a monumental task, and doing laundry is more difficult than studying thermodynamics!
Some of these moms are just out of control. At my nephew's high school, they've had to put a security guard at the door to the boys' locker room to keep moms out during sports events. I don't know what's worse about that: the overbearing parenting or the sense of entitlement.
My oldest son was married, but when he decided that he didn't want children, and she decided she really wanted them, that caused a problem. In the end, they divorced because of that and because he wanted to be a digital nomad, and she wanted to go into academia, which meant staying in one place. They're still very good friends, and she has two kids now. When he met his second serious relationship, I wasn't crazy about her, I didn't care for how she treated him, but I kept my mouth shut because he seemed happy, and who am I to decide, right? In the end, they broke up. He now has one significant woman in his life, who is totally lovely, and they're both polyamorous, and he's realized he's bisexual. Not your typical guy, but he's never been typical, always went his own way, and that's what makes him happy. As long as he's happy, that's all that matters to me. Oh, and because I don't "helicopter" him, when we do see each other, it is great. A few months ago, he wrote to me "when are you coming to see me? I miss you!" So, I booked a flight and went to visit. It was lovely. But I do miss him all the time, I just keep my mouth shut.
I'm literally your number one fan in the UK 🇬🇧 I have told every person about your podcast and they’re all love you! You two woman are so fucking funny and cheer me up so much. I literally have you two scheduled in my diary every day for IHIP news and the luxury of I’ve had it two days a week. Thank you, thank you, thank you!.. ❤❤
I was going to college in my early 50’s. Because I was the same age as the professors teaching, I had a lot of talks with them. One incident that happened was a light bulb had burned out in the hallway of the dorm and the student were too scared to call maintenance and get the bulb changed. She had her mom call. Another incident I remember told by the biology professor was when in biology 101 the assignment was to look at different things under a microscope. One item was a cabbage. A girl screamed and refused to touch the cabbage. She had never seen an entire cabbage in her life.
Hey, Jennifer. Recently retired prof/administrator at Syracuse. I appreciate your restraint. In my early days there many years ago, I was one of the respondents to parents with weak boundaries! You are the best.
I can tell you what happens to these kids. I worked as a recruiter for a call center and mothers would not only call to check on the status of applications for their candidate, but would even ask to come into the interview with them. I would have to break their Mom ❤ and decline that request since we only hired people who were at least 18. One mother called to ask why their precious angel wasn’t offered a position and informed us we should be ashamed because we made them cry. They were in their 20s.
I recently had a disagreement with a coworker because I asked her to cover a call in. She called her mom, who then came into the office to argue on her behalf why she wouldn’t have to do that. She was about 28 years old. Needless to say, she was let go
Welcome back Pumps. Jennifer and Kelly & Josh did a great job in your absence. It was great to put a face to Josh for his future idiot stories. I’m thinking about Italy and her new white shorts 🩳
My kids are all in their 30s. They barely communicated with me in their 20s, but now we talk regularly. They often call when I'm busy & I feel impatient sometimes. But I'm so grateful that my kids actually like me, unlike so many fractured families these days, that I stop what I'm doing & chat. The conversation is usually about current events or planned projects. We're all politically progressive, so politics is a big part of our connection as adults. I love it. I was definitely a hands off parent when they were younger. I let them find their own way from adolescence on. They're all atheist leftists & totally self sufficient, so I guess I did a great job
Good morning ladies 😊 I'm kinda newer to your channel & I absolutely love it!! This morning, I've Had It w/ not having my 💩 together! You guys are my role models now & I wanna be just like ya'll when I grow up! (I'll be 51 in March so it should happen soon💙) Thank you for your show & being downright blunt, honest & hilarious 😂
My son is 35 now, .At age 17, he was paired with a kid from his class for a project. The mom basically did the project. My son got home, very frustrated that he was prevented from participating in his project. They (she) got an "A", he was completely disgusted. I never intervened. Im a single mom, with little resources. That mommy could not be there for final exams. Mommy's boy did not get honours. My son did. 😊 He went to university during a drought, and he had to deal with water restrictions!. Now he jas a master's degree and a good job.
Hello and happy new year from the land Down Under! Remember to show some love to your pets and be kind to any animals you come across. And take care of yourselves!
My mom was an enmeshed parent, and I didn’t fully understand it when I went off to school but knew it was weird (and mom was beginning to understand it). I set the boundary when I went away to school that I would call them on Sunday nights and if I absolutely needed them in crisis. That was it. No calling me or calling the cops unless I miss a Sunday call. This last letter was WILD.
When my son was a toddler he made his own breakfast, my mom never let me forget how I made him do things for himself. He moved out at 19 and lives with his buddies and goes to college in town and has a full time job with insurance. I only see him once in a while. My brother’s daughters are 22 and 26 with a college degree with part time jobs and still live at home. My sister in law calls them her ‘babies’. But then she asked me, how did I do it? How did I get my son to leave? First of all, he’s not my ‘baby’…
So many young people are different from older generations. I was ready mentally to leave home from the time I was 15. Couldn't wait to get away from my parents. But I couldn't leave at 15. But I had already planned to " get out" by 18-20. Yes, I went to college. And I did manage to leave by 20. Been on my own ever since. I don't understand kids today. I didn't want to be " friends" with my parents. Why do they,?😐
Wish I would have kept my independence. Was out by 17, and stayed away from my mom, but tried to help with my younger siblings... At 27 I let her move in to the house behind me, and she ended up being MAGA and all the issues that were 'me' in the past, I realized it was her dysfunction, not mine... Now, we do not speak after she stole my house from under me with a 'rent to own' promise, and then sold it right at the end. Eff em all.
👏 I had my daughter at 18 she saw me struggle and is now doing her own thing since she was 18. She is 21 now. She is not perfect but I am proud of her for making her own way. ❤
@@track1949 That made me smile. I graduated from high school on a Friday. I moved 1,600 miles away on the following Monday for a summer job in Florida. In the fall I started university at a school in another state 1,400 miles from my parents. We were a close family. But, they raised my sister and me to stand on our own two feet.
Morning girls from 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧. Happy new year. Could I tell you my grievance … women who take their husbands/partners to a supermarket. They’re all buying crap stuff and both look fed up … with themselves and the chore. Now, in France, i love watching men grocery shopping. They’re reading the labels, look interested and no doubt going to conjure up a feast. Next visit I’m going to start stalking them. Vive la difference 🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷
What is sad is that when/if the kids get away, the mothers are left with nothing. I still had my job as a teacher, but I saw many mothers left with nothing. It was quite sad.
I was cooking dinner a couple/few times per week by the time I was in 3rd/4th grade. I earned money for things I wanted (babysitting, helping mom do things like wall-papering, build a rock wall, painting the porch swing/walls, mowing with a push mower...). I helped dad do some carpentry and plumbing. I was taught how to count/handle money by the time I was 12 for sure. 🙄 I could cook, clean, do washing and ironing. (I hated washing dishes and would choose anything else if I could!🤦♀️). I tried to teach my sons at least the basics before they reached college. Although they weren’t interested, I told them that they better learn because I wasn’t going to step in and do for them! 😆🤗
I’m one of those “single cat (dogs) ladies”. So of course I know NOTHING about raising children. I have a friend that I told ages ago that she raises her 3 older daughters differently to her baby boy. I said the girls were going to end up independent young women and the son was going to end up a momma’s boy. She asked why I said that. I asked her if she gave her daughters “sleepy sand” when her daughters were going to bed at night. She said no but she does her son so that he could go to sleep. I said, Are you going to expect his wife to give him “sleepy sand” every night?”. Whatever you are doing to your son now is setting him up for what he’s going to expect from his wife and he is going to be quite upset if she doesn’t want to sprinkle imaginary sand in his eyes so he can go night-night. 😜
Pumps you look fabulous, you no longer need to adjust your clothes, I too used to do that before I lost weight, now neither of us have to do that, all you need to do is sit there and look beautiful, it’ll take some time to stop fidgeting and adjusting your clothes because it’s a habit, but there’s nothing to hide you look fabulous! Take Care & Be Safe
My sister took her 16 yr old son out of high school and found a home schooling program for his junior and senior years. He was caught exhaling vape smoke in the bathroom by a teacher. He had taken a drag off a friend’s vape who had just exited. My nephew was told they would call the police if he didn’t snitch on his friend so he did. My sister was so afraid he would get beaten up that she immediately took him out of school permanently. I was gobsmacked but we are not close at all so I didn’t say much. I’m liberal, she moved to the south years ago and has become an extreme conservative. It’s like we’re from different planets.
Hi Pumps, this is off topic but I had to mention that that outfit combo is gorgeous. The colour against your skin tone is lovely. Love the Color of the blazer. Would you mind sharing where you got it. Thanks.
Your the best ladies. You both look great, stylish pretty honest and down to earth. Who wouldn't appreciate you. I need you both to vent because sometimes I swear I feel like I am losing my mind with everything going on in the world. 😢
Love that you brought the chairs back.. do like the table , also… and understand and support you doing what you need and want for your podcast. I enjoy you both so much.
THIS EPISODE IS SO VALIDATING! I love it when you guys go off on the power moms. I always say “My normal or within bounds involvement with my kids looks like scarcity because of these other moms.” It’s maddening. As I got older and when my daughter hit her Senior year, I was much braver in saying “no” and letting parents judge me. Get a life!!!
Oh wow my husband told me about some of the parents when we took my son down for orientation for college. Parents were still trying to baby the kids and asking the craziest questions!
This is funny as hell. I live and work in a college town and we get calls all the the time from parents asking questions for their children about our services. I work at the county-owned landfill. I think the same. It is sad that the "children" are too meek or entitled to actually call us and ask questions....
I went to a very big university when I was young and found my own jobs, friends, and must've gotten my own quarters for the washers when I first had to live in a dorm. No one I know would ever had considered asking any of these things of their parents. Is FB the problem or just how non-reliant we now are as Americans? Tragic and scary for the future.
Among everything else I did (including firing my kids from chores for noncompliance from doing said chores) to taking them to the grocery store while they were in high school, telling the, they had 60$/week from breakfast and lunch, walking the, through the first time and then let them decide. The point was to continue to teach them how to be adults after they left the house. How to make decisions on their own. My daughter was being her own clothes including the payment transaction since she was 11. They are now very successful at managing their own lives with the occasional call for advice. They are flabbergasted that their friends don’t know how to empty the lint screen on the dryer. I did not helicopter. . . .i raised them to be independent and confident in their own decisions.
I went on a trip overseas and it was amazing that i was the only one who knew how to get back to the place we needed to go, if i had let these kids go the opposite direction they would've gotten lost. I think more people need to realize that kids will might have to go to a big city one day and so they need to be prepared by learning how to find their way as well as use public transit. I don't have alot of money, so if im still working when i have a kid, there will be some time where the kid has to use taxis or public transit until they can pay for their own car, i could drop them off at work if its close enough, but if its clear on the otherside of the city, id rather they use public transit.
And see, I have never gotten advice like that, and had to be the parent to both my parents in different ways. My mom is the narcissist and 'alpha' of the family, so her motives are to keep you dumb and useful only to her, escaped her, and now I'm stuck with my father, who is a bachelor, and lives like one. Eating the same things everyday, doesn't know how to clean, do other housework... And I'm sitting here at 34 asking why I gave up my entire livelihood to try to move closer to my job and just have nothing... Like got COVID and threw up for a week straight which destroyed my teeth, and then my own mother cut me off from all my networking and finances... And I'm just lost now. Would kill my own mother if I could go back and get one with a brain, honestly.
My ex’ parents did this to him. As an adult he couldn’t make his own friends and manage time. It led to his demise after we divorced. He drank himself to death because he lacked coping skills and didn’t seek help. Don’t do this to your kid.
Great discussion. you both look so summery and toned in your outfits! Your studio must be well-heated. I sympathize with your critical take on mom talk! in Belgium it is normal for women to return to work about 6 weeks after childbirth. We have cheap childcare to do that. Then, as a German I always had a few non-working German/Austrian moms with high-earning husbands around me who made the children their entire life. There was this disconnect, the cool Belgian moms who thought I was totally dedicated, and I was, working as little as I could get away with as a freelance, and the German/Austrian moms who pitied me for being a single working parent and were holier than thou about their mothering role and their magnificent children. I thought I had somewhat spoiled my son with material things and to my surprise he told me 20 odd years later how, some favourite he would love me coming home from work with little gifts: a sticker, a favourite chewing gum, a little colouring book etc. He has always been proud of my job as a simultaneous interpreter and likes to tell his friends I speak X number of languages and towards the end of a 6 week summer holiday he would urge me to return to work to replenish our bank account, ha,ha. after my son got into trouble as a teen I did a bit more micromanagement and while he appreciated the support he also couldn't wait to cut the apron strings. He decided to move and work abroad at 18 and as much as I put accomodation in place and helped find training and a job and financially I had to accept being kept at arm's length and make do with a phone call every 2 weeks or in times of need, and not to have phone calls or messages answered. A year into to trying to be the responsible parent I had to acknowledge that he was independent, finding his own jobs his own accomodation and later his own two universities and do the paper work involved. I am very proud of his independence, ambition and professional succes and even more at his joy in life.
As a parent with a senior in high school, I stay out of any school stuff unless I need to go. Let the teachers do their job and let the students be responsible for their own actions.
You women talk about bringing snacks for school activities reminded me of my experience with snacks. The snacks were supposed to be healthy. Ok. So I send my healthy snack….i arrive to find all the kids threw it away by and large. Fruit and veg isn’t always what they want. Sooooo, I started making this muffin recipe to send, cinnamon muffins. They were brown and the kids loved them! They looked “healthy” for the moms, but they tasted great and they weren’t in the trash! Good grief, I figured they have parents that can give them truly healthy food at home.
High school teacher from Down Under here and hoooooly crap some parents drive me up the wall. There's definitely the helicopter types who insist on joining their kids on every activity/excursion, but sadly also the parents who just Do Not Care. A colleague of mine had to handle a student (Kid 1) making fun of another student (Kid 2) for having a mum with cancer. When Kid 1's mum was called up her only response was, "I help him do homework the second he gets home. Everything that happens at school is up to you." Truly unbelievable.
I have 3 sons, all self employed, 29,24,20! I talk to my oldest a few times a week just to say hi and end with I love ya! My middle son maybe once a day just to say hi, my youngest several times a day because he is a Jockey and I’m in the horse business so we chat about his career! None live at home, very smart independent guys! My husband is a veterinarian, works 90 hrs a week I’ve never needed his air to breathe, been married 29 yrs, no affairs still like them all ! We are all self motivated! Do better people! NONE WENT TO COLLEGE, one welder, one owns his own small trucking Co, but also welds other is a TB Jockey!,
I can’t help but notice that all of these mothers are mothers of male children. I think girls are much more mature because we are taught to cook, clean and do laundry at a young age at least that was how my sisters and I were raised. I’ve been “adulting” since I was 10 years old I also started babysitting at about 12 or 13. Momma’s boys are the worse.
I recall hearing about parents going to their children's job interviews. It might have been a one off. If I were the hiring party that would be the shortest job interview in history: "Get the fuck out of my office!"
I heard about a job interview where the husband came with his wife and tried to answer her questions. (Definitely red flags there.) Needless to say, she wasn't hired.
in that story of the mother who wants a camera on his child's college room is the kind of mother who shows up in a white gown at the wedding of her son. total psycho.
I think pumps is right tho . I agree w pumps….. If I saw family issues in the person my child wanted to marry , I would def step in … pumps also sees so much in her practice she is essentially helping her child avoid the mess of a future divorce
25:31 I was thinking the exact same thing. Knowing how the parents are parenting would immediately make me nervous about the child lol. I know it's not fair, but there must be a butt load of entitled adults who still feel like children. Imagine how they act when there is a real crisis! 😐
Oh my gawd, who are these mothers?!! I mean, I know a few, and one for sure who will be in the deans office complaining for her adult kids about water taste and sleep issues. It's gross!! Make it stop. I feel sick. 🤢🤮🤢
I'm not rich, glamorous, and filthy-mouthed like Jennifer and Angela. Because of my shortcomings, I seek them out each day for an ample dose of irreverent commentary and honest news coverage delivered with intelligence and class. Thank you, ladies, for establishing a platform for me to live vicariously! Five-star review.⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
On to crazy parents. In my area boy friend girl friend’s families/parents go on vacation together. In middle school and high school. Plus parents go out to eat at the same place their kids go for pom. Only they do sit at different tables. There is more of this crazy stuff but not enough room to share it.
This episode reminded me of a term, from a short story I read a long time ago, which was "motherly fatuity. " So many of the mothers, who posted their concerns, appear to fall into this category.
She'll want to install a camera that will allow her to read bible verses at him while she sits at HQ monitoring potential nocturnal emissions. That mother really disturbs me, she probably banned locks on bathroom and bedroom doors at home and waltzed in on anyone changing clothes or trying to pee in peace. 😢
I'm a college professor. Recently, I started telling the students at the beginning of the semester, "I will not correspond with your parents. Your education, as an adult, is your business."
I stopped emailing teachers on behalf of my kids once they were in middle school. They were ready.
@whyarepeoplecrazy Me, too!
Absolutely 😎
A Trump flag!?
Yeah, it'd make a good substitute for a dartboard.
👏👏👏
My 21-year old son, in college, recently told me a story…a very attractive young lady whom he was aquatinted with made some pretty forward advances on him. He had red flags; and begged off. Understand, the young lady was not only attractive, but came from a wealthy family. My son is a proud, complete Leftist. Other friends informed him that the young lady was a die-hard Trump supporter. He subsequently broke it off.
I think he has grown up well.
I think he did. As a 42 years old man, i find this stories very hopeful for the future. It doesn't matter how attractive somone is, if that woman is a consevative i wouldn't date her let alone a trump supporter .
My 21 year old daughter has been with the same guy for a couple of years now. I rarely discuss politics with my kids unless they open the topic for discussion, but my daughter started kinda sorta spouting off things you might hear from the Trump base and my red flags went up. I'm pretty sure her guy is a Trump supporter. The conflict I am having is - the guy is really sweet to my daughter. They respect and love each other. I honestly don't know how the family gatherings will go but I will have to work extra hard to bite my lip for certain discussions.
And, you did a great job, mom!!
@@ProudOgreDadhe doesn’t respect her. Cause he voted agayher having healthcare
@@ProudOgreDad Just don't give your blessing if he asks for her hand. Let them get married in isolation.
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Your program has provided more honest insight into society, politics & life than CNN & MSNBC 😂😅
CNN stopped giving a crap about honesty a while ago, any network that would have Scott Jennings on as a regular contributor doesn't give a damn about honesty
As a retired librarian I would have parents come to the library with their son or daughter (more often, their son), who was a junior or senior in high school. The mom would say to me (with their child standing right next to them), WE are here to get information for OUR senior project (or whatever the assignment was)! The teen would stand there silently, but seemingly not uncomfortable - likely because this scenario was typical.
I would direct my questions to the teen. And before they could begin to try to answer, the mom would immediately answer my all of my questions. It was beyond outrageous and inappropriate, yet tragically, not an uncommon experience!
Love you women! Caw! Caw!
O-M-G I’m now thankful for having an absent father and alcoholic mother. Talk about growing up with NO SUPERVISION
@@susien7323 That made me laugh!
A wise woman once told me that your children are watching you and how you make your way through the world. That’s showing them the reality of the world. Be truly present when you are there with them and let go of the guilt.
Pumps is baaaack!
And her legs are f*cking incredible *HOLY*
Missed you, Pumps!! CAW CAW!!! 🦅🦅🦅
"Mind your own business" is a way to live, and it's a great life! Looking out and helping, people in obvious need is another thing.
Love you ladies, it's been a full year of giggles with you! Happy New Year 🥳🥳🥳
I like to say it sounds like a you problem
As a 48 yr old male, I need the perspective you ladies spew out to the world.
🚁You've nailed it here. I was a university manager in our communications office. I had a parent call to ask if their child could "graduate with their friends" despite their child not having completed their degree requirements. 🤦🏻🤦🏻🤦🏻
I soon learned a tiering system for helicopter parents. The ones who threatened our physical safety were called "Blackhawks." [caw-caw! love you, Pumps!]
I am now a college instructor and you nailed it. Not only does a parent contacting an instructor NOT help, but we are legally NOT allowed to communicate about an adult student's academic progress with any third-party requester ...and that includes the students' parents.
Parents: please don't do this.
I used to work in a Registrar's Office at an Ivy League University. We were a GRADUATE school and had mothers calling about ridiculous issues. Because of FERPA, we weren't allowed to disclose grades, etc. But one would call EVERY DAY trying to find out the grade from a particular professor. The only exception to this helicoptering might be children who are autistic or handicapped and really need the help. But usually that is arranged ahead of time with administration, not 'off-the-cuff.'
I'm a childless widower and this segment about College moms cracked me the fuck up. I had no idea that this world existed. I feel deprived.
It's crazy out there! My daughter tells me that some students at her university are really having a difficult time coping. Resiliency, what is that? Their levels of anxiety are sky high , making simple decisions are a monumental task, and doing laundry is more difficult than studying thermodynamics!
Some of these moms are just out of control. At my nephew's high school, they've had to put a security guard at the door to the boys' locker room to keep moms out during sports events. I don't know what's worse about that: the overbearing parenting or the sense of entitlement.
Someone alert the Republican Party. We can't have moms going into boys locker rooms in high schools. Good God!!! LMFAO.😂😂😂
Omg 😲 what the hell is wrong with these women
😂
@@vintagesportscardfinds964😂
I'd inform Nancy Mace about that one
My oldest son was married, but when he decided that he didn't want children, and she decided she really wanted them, that caused a problem. In the end, they divorced because of that and because he wanted to be a digital nomad, and she wanted to go into academia, which meant staying in one place. They're still very good friends, and she has two kids now. When he met his second serious relationship, I wasn't crazy about her, I didn't care for how she treated him, but I kept my mouth shut because he seemed happy, and who am I to decide, right? In the end, they broke up. He now has one significant woman in his life, who is totally lovely, and they're both polyamorous, and he's realized he's bisexual. Not your typical guy, but he's never been typical, always went his own way, and that's what makes him happy. As long as he's happy, that's all that matters to me. Oh, and because I don't "helicopter" him, when we do see each other, it is great. A few months ago, he wrote to me "when are you coming to see me? I miss you!" So, I booked a flight and went to visit. It was lovely. But I do miss him all the time, I just keep my mouth shut.
I'm literally your number one fan in the UK 🇬🇧
I have told every person about your podcast and they’re all love you!
You two woman are so fucking funny and cheer me up so much.
I literally have you two scheduled in my diary every day for IHIP news and the luxury of I’ve had it two days a week.
Thank you, thank you, thank you!.. ❤❤
I was going to college in my early 50’s. Because I was the same age as the professors teaching, I had a lot of talks with them. One incident that happened was a light bulb had burned out in the hallway of the dorm and the student were too scared to call maintenance and get the bulb changed. She had her mom call. Another incident I remember told by the biology professor was when in biology 101 the assignment was to look at different things under a microscope. One item was a cabbage. A girl screamed and refused to touch the cabbage. She had never seen an entire cabbage in her life.
I know what I'd buy that girl every birthday and Christmas 😂🥬
Seriously you two are the best!!! Thank you for putting it out there. You are definitely a 5 star and beyond.
Rolling on floor roaring with laughter over last Mama heart who expected multiple calls daily!!
Hey, Jennifer. Recently retired prof/administrator at Syracuse. I appreciate your restraint. In my early days there many years ago, I was one of the respondents to parents with weak boundaries! You are the best.
I can tell you what happens to these kids. I worked as a recruiter for a call center and mothers would not only call to check on the status of applications for their candidate, but would even ask to come into the interview with them. I would have to break their Mom ❤ and decline that request since we only hired people who were at least 18. One mother called to ask why their precious angel wasn’t offered a position and informed us we should be ashamed because we made them cry. They were in their 20s.
Dang, those poor kids are headed for some very hard times. My third graders have more independence. 💔
Jennifer is so right, kids can get guidance but you have to let them make their OWN mistakes in relationships.
You two are the first podcast I seek in the morning. Such common sense and little potty mouth🤪
I recently had a disagreement with a coworker because I asked her to cover a call in. She called her mom, who then came into the office to argue on her behalf why she wouldn’t have to do that. She was about 28 years old. Needless to say, she was let go
My 22 and 25 year old kids were raised to think and do for themselves. Period.
Welcome back Pumps. Jennifer and Kelly & Josh did a great job in your absence. It was great to put a face to Josh for his future idiot stories. I’m thinking about Italy and her new white shorts 🩳
If you haven't seen episodes with Josh as a guest, do yourself a favor and go look for them! It is SO funny when they are all there! He's a hoot!!
I did like having Josh on, too. He will loosen up over time. Great job all.
@@sandirhodes9126 I’ve been staying current and going back watching earlier podcasts. These women are funny as 💩. lol ❤️
@@mojopitdog just know he’s also a attorney, he’s the perfect fill in. But still unforgivable for the sauce spill on her white shorts in Italy
My kids are all in their 30s. They barely communicated with me in their 20s, but now we talk regularly. They often call when I'm busy & I feel impatient sometimes. But I'm so grateful that my kids actually like me, unlike so many fractured families these days, that I stop what I'm doing & chat. The conversation is usually about current events or planned projects. We're all politically progressive, so politics is a big part of our connection as adults. I love it. I was definitely a hands off parent when they were younger. I let them find their own way from adolescence on. They're all atheist leftists & totally self sufficient, so I guess I did a great job
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Good morning ladies 😊 I'm kinda newer to your channel & I absolutely love it!! This morning, I've Had It w/ not having my 💩 together! You guys are my role models now & I wanna be just like ya'll when I grow up! (I'll be 51 in March so it should happen soon💙) Thank you for your show & being downright blunt, honest & hilarious 😂
🌹🌹 Y’all are the best. Thanks for REAL TALK!! I learn the best word usage here. 🤬🤬😅
My son is 35 now, .At age 17, he was paired with a kid from his class for a project. The mom basically did the project. My son got home, very frustrated that he was prevented from participating in his project. They (she) got an "A", he was completely disgusted. I never intervened. Im a single mom, with little resources. That mommy could not be there for final exams. Mommy's boy did not get honours. My son did. 😊 He went to university during a drought, and he had to deal with water restrictions!. Now he jas a master's degree and a good job.
Pumps and the comfy chairs are back... K- Caw ... Love from Canada ♥️💚💜🇨🇦
This was filmed a while ago before she left. They have since got rid of the chairs.
Cut not the "Apron Strings", but the "Umbilical Cord"! 🤣
So glad you are back Pumps.
I love the chairs instead of the white desk! Feels more comfy 🛋 😍
Omg I'm sitting here listening to you guys talk about the Mom trying to find quarters for her son at college and I'm crying laughing haha 😭 so funny
Hello and happy new year from the land Down Under! Remember to show some love to your pets and be kind to any animals you come across. And take care of yourselves!
I love it. Y’all are funny as hell with ya mama hearts.
You gals are definitely one of a kind and unique and I absolutely love you! ❤
You are killing me with laughter today, thank you!! I've seen 2 sons through university, and into jobs without a stitch of helicopter from me.
My mom was an enmeshed parent, and I didn’t fully understand it when I went off to school but knew it was weird (and mom was beginning to understand it). I set the boundary when I went away to school that I would call them on Sunday nights and if I absolutely needed them in crisis. That was it. No calling me or calling the cops unless I miss a Sunday call. This last letter was WILD.
Very, very smart to see a screenshot of grades before paying tuition!
Pumps looks real cute today top to bottom very put together had to get that out there. Vacation did you good girl ❤
When my son was a toddler he made his own breakfast, my mom never let me forget how I made him do things for himself. He moved out at 19 and lives with his buddies and goes to college in town and has a full time job with insurance. I only see him once in a while.
My brother’s daughters are 22 and 26 with a college degree with part time jobs and still live at home. My sister in law calls them her ‘babies’. But then she asked me, how did I do it? How did I get my son to leave? First of all, he’s not my ‘baby’…
So many young people are different from older generations.
I was ready mentally to leave home from the time I was 15. Couldn't wait to get away from my parents.
But I couldn't leave at 15. But I had already planned to " get out" by 18-20. Yes, I went to college. And I did manage to leave by 20. Been on my own ever since.
I don't understand kids today. I didn't want to be " friends" with my parents. Why do they,?😐
Wish I would have kept my independence. Was out by 17, and stayed away from my mom, but tried to help with my younger siblings... At 27 I let her move in to the house behind me, and she ended up being MAGA and all the issues that were 'me' in the past, I realized it was her dysfunction, not mine... Now, we do not speak after she stole my house from under me with a 'rent to own' promise, and then sold it right at the end. Eff em all.
I made sure my kids knew how to do laundry, cook food and general maintenance on cars.
👏 I had my daughter at 18 she saw me struggle and is now doing her own thing since she was 18. She is 21 now. She is not perfect but I am proud of her for making her own way. ❤
@@track1949 That made me smile. I graduated from high school on a Friday. I moved 1,600 miles away on the following Monday for a summer job in Florida. In the fall I started university at a school in another state 1,400 miles from my parents. We were a close family. But, they raised my sister and me to stand on our own two feet.
Morning girls from 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧. Happy new year. Could I tell you my grievance … women who take their husbands/partners to a supermarket. They’re all buying crap stuff and both look fed up … with themselves and the chore. Now, in France, i love watching men grocery shopping. They’re reading the labels, look interested and no doubt going to conjure up a feast. Next visit I’m going to start stalking them. Vive la difference 🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷
What is sad is that when/if the kids get away, the mothers are left with nothing. I still had my job as a teacher, but I saw many mothers left with nothing. It was quite sad.
You two are so funny. Great way to start my day. 💙
I was cooking dinner a couple/few times per week by the time I was in 3rd/4th grade. I earned money for things I wanted (babysitting, helping mom do things like wall-papering, build a rock wall, painting the porch swing/walls, mowing with a push mower...). I helped dad do some carpentry and plumbing. I was taught how to count/handle money by the time I was 12 for sure. 🙄 I could cook, clean, do washing and ironing. (I hated washing dishes and would choose anything else if I could!🤦♀️).
I tried to teach my sons at least the basics before they reached college. Although they weren’t interested, I told them that they better learn because I wasn’t going to step in and do for them! 😆🤗
I’m one of those “single cat (dogs) ladies”. So of course I know NOTHING about raising children. I have a friend that I told ages ago that she raises her 3 older daughters differently to her baby boy. I said the girls were going to end up independent young women and the son was going to end up a momma’s boy. She asked why I said that. I asked her if she gave her daughters “sleepy sand” when her daughters were going to bed at night. She said no but she does her son so that he could go to sleep. I said, Are you going to expect his wife to give him “sleepy sand” every night?”. Whatever you are doing to your son now is setting him up for what he’s going to expect from his wife and he is going to be quite upset if she doesn’t want to sprinkle imaginary sand in his eyes so he can go night-night. 😜
Pumps you look fabulous, you no longer need to adjust your clothes, I too used to do that before I lost weight, now neither of us have to do that, all you need to do is sit there and look beautiful, it’ll take some time to stop fidgeting and adjusting your clothes because it’s a habit, but there’s nothing to hide you look fabulous!
Take Care & Be Safe
My sister took her 16 yr old son out of high school and found a home schooling program for his junior and senior years. He was caught exhaling vape smoke in the bathroom by a teacher. He had taken a drag off a friend’s vape who had just exited. My nephew was told they would call the police if he didn’t snitch on his friend so he did. My sister was so afraid he would get beaten up that she immediately took him out of school permanently. I was gobsmacked but we are not close at all so I didn’t say much. I’m liberal, she moved to the south years ago and has become an extreme conservative. It’s like we’re from different planets.
"It takes a lot of money to look this bad." I am DED laughing - right in the spirit of Dolly Parton. ❤❤💙❤ Congratulations to the Hinge couple!
Hi Pumps, this is off topic but I had to mention that that outfit combo is gorgeous. The colour against your skin tone is lovely. Love the Color of the blazer. Would you mind sharing where you got it. Thanks.
Professors per federal law (FERPA) are not allowed to speak with parents about how a child is performing.
You ladies are candid and funny 😊
Your the best ladies. You both look great, stylish pretty honest and down to earth. Who wouldn't appreciate you. I need you both to vent because sometimes I swear I feel like I am losing my mind with everything going on in the world. 😢
The 911 mom had me in stitches. I need to know more.
And my deprived, neglected son got told “You are a grown ass man. Handle your own shit.” And, he did.
Love that you brought the chairs back.. do like the table , also… and understand and support you doing what you need and want for your podcast. I enjoy you both so much.
THIS EPISODE IS SO VALIDATING! I love it when you guys go off on the power moms. I always say “My normal or within bounds involvement with my kids looks like scarcity because of these other moms.”
It’s maddening. As I got older and when my daughter hit her Senior year, I was much braver in saying “no” and letting parents judge me. Get a life!!!
Oh wow my husband told me about some of the parents when we took my son down for orientation for college. Parents were still trying to baby the kids and asking the craziest questions!
😂😂😂😂
I have never heard the phrase mama heart and I hope I never do! 😂
Yay. The tables gone and Pumps🔥 legs are back. 👏🏻😅
Another great show, ladies. Love you all.
This is funny as hell. I live and work in a college town and we get calls all the the time from parents asking questions for their children about our services. I work at the county-owned landfill. I think the same. It is sad that the "children" are too meek or entitled to actually call us and ask questions....
I went to a very big university when I was young and found my own jobs, friends, and must've gotten my own quarters for the washers when I first had to live in a dorm. No one I know would ever had considered asking any of these things of their parents. Is FB the problem or just how non-reliant we now are as Americans? Tragic and scary for the future.
25:39 “I’m just not a good person though” I’m ending every single opinion I give with that from now on. Thank you for your wisdom Pumps❤
Among everything else I did (including firing my kids from chores for noncompliance from doing said chores) to taking them to the grocery store while they were in high school, telling the, they had 60$/week from breakfast and lunch, walking the, through the first time and then let them decide. The point was to continue to teach them how to be adults after they left the house. How to make decisions on their own. My daughter was being her own clothes including the payment transaction since she was 11. They are now very successful at managing their own lives with the occasional call for advice. They are flabbergasted that their friends don’t know how to empty the lint screen on the dryer. I did not helicopter. . . .i raised them to be independent and confident in their own decisions.
I went on a trip overseas and it was amazing that i was the only one who knew how to get back to the place we needed to go, if i had let these kids go the opposite direction they would've gotten lost. I think more people need to realize that kids will might have to go to a big city one day and so they need to be prepared by learning how to find their way as well as use public transit. I don't have alot of money, so if im still working when i have a kid, there will be some time where the kid has to use taxis or public transit until they can pay for their own car, i could drop them off at work if its close enough, but if its clear on the otherside of the city, id rather they use public transit.
And see, I have never gotten advice like that, and had to be the parent to both my parents in different ways. My mom is the narcissist and 'alpha' of the family, so her motives are to keep you dumb and useful only to her, escaped her, and now I'm stuck with my father, who is a bachelor, and lives like one. Eating the same things everyday, doesn't know how to clean, do other housework... And I'm sitting here at 34 asking why I gave up my entire livelihood to try to move closer to my job and just have nothing... Like got COVID and threw up for a week straight which destroyed my teeth, and then my own mother cut me off from all my networking and finances... And I'm just lost now. Would kill my own mother if I could go back and get one with a brain, honestly.
My ex’ parents did this to him. As an adult he couldn’t make his own friends and manage time. It led to his demise after we divorced. He drank himself to death because he lacked coping skills and didn’t seek help. Don’t do this to your kid.
Great discussion. you both look so summery and toned in your outfits! Your studio must be well-heated. I sympathize with your critical take on mom talk! in Belgium it is normal for women to return to work about 6 weeks after childbirth. We have cheap childcare to do that. Then, as a German I always had a few non-working German/Austrian moms with high-earning husbands around me who made the children their entire life. There was this disconnect, the cool Belgian moms who thought I was totally dedicated, and I was, working as little as I could get away with as a freelance, and the German/Austrian moms who pitied me for being a single working parent and were holier than thou about their mothering role and their magnificent children. I thought I had somewhat spoiled my son with material things and to my surprise he told me 20 odd years later how, some favourite he would love me coming home from work with little gifts: a sticker, a favourite chewing gum, a little colouring book etc. He has always been proud of my job as a simultaneous interpreter and likes to tell his friends I speak X number of languages and towards the end of a 6 week summer holiday he would urge me to return to work to replenish our bank account, ha,ha.
after my son got into trouble as a teen I did a bit more micromanagement and while he appreciated the support he also couldn't wait to cut the apron strings. He decided to move and work abroad at 18 and as much as I put accomodation in place and helped find training and a job and financially I had to accept being kept at arm's length and make do with a phone call every 2 weeks or in times of need, and not to have phone calls or messages answered. A year into to trying to be the responsible parent I had to acknowledge that he was independent, finding his own jobs his own accomodation and later his own two universities and do the paper work involved. I am very proud of his independence, ambition and professional succes and even more at his joy in life.
As a parent with a senior in high school, I stay out of any school stuff unless I need to go. Let the teachers do their job and let the students be responsible for their own actions.
Soliciting friends for your child on Facebook seems Dangerous 😳
You women talk about bringing snacks for school activities reminded me of my experience with snacks. The snacks were supposed to be healthy. Ok. So I send my healthy snack….i arrive to find all the kids threw it away by and large. Fruit and veg isn’t always what they want. Sooooo, I started making this muffin recipe to send, cinnamon muffins. They were brown and the kids loved them! They looked “healthy” for the moms, but they tasted great and they weren’t in the trash! Good grief, I figured they have parents that can give them truly healthy food at home.
Brilliant! Single moms are heroes❤
High school teacher from Down Under here and hoooooly crap some parents drive me up the wall. There's definitely the helicopter types who insist on joining their kids on every activity/excursion, but sadly also the parents who just Do Not Care. A colleague of mine had to handle a student (Kid 1) making fun of another student (Kid 2) for having a mum with cancer. When Kid 1's mum was called up her only response was, "I help him do homework the second he gets home. Everything that happens at school is up to you." Truly unbelievable.
I've just realised that helicopter parenting is not so much about love than it is about ensuring a good return on investment. How sad.
Happy New Year ladies and wlc back Pumps!🥰🥰🙏🙏
I have 3 sons, all self employed, 29,24,20! I talk to my oldest a few times a week just to say hi and end with I love ya! My middle son maybe once a day just to say hi, my youngest several times a day because he is a Jockey and I’m in the horse business so we chat about his career! None live at home, very smart independent guys! My husband is a veterinarian, works 90 hrs a week I’ve never needed his air to breathe, been married 29 yrs, no affairs still like them all ! We are all self motivated! Do better people! NONE WENT TO COLLEGE, one welder, one owns his own small trucking Co, but also welds other is a TB Jockey!,
I can’t help but notice that all of these mothers are mothers of male children. I think girls are much more mature because we are taught to cook, clean and do laundry at a young age at least that was how my sisters and I were raised. I’ve been “adulting” since I was 10 years old I also started babysitting at about 12 or 13. Momma’s boys are the worse.
Welcome back, pumps!
If you work, you are a terrible mother. If you stay home, you're a terrible mother. And it's women who lead the charge against each other.
Pumps, you look fabulous today. I hope you had a great vacation.
Pumps face at 35:35…I am CRYING. 😂😂😂😂😂
That's when I'm glad I don't have kids. Such a difficult "job".
Jenn it warms me up that you're mentioning my home town Syracuse, Ny😊.
I recall hearing about parents going to their children's job interviews. It might have been a one off. If I were the hiring party that would be the shortest job interview in history: "Get the fuck out of my office!"
I heard about a job interview where the husband came with his wife and tried to answer her questions. (Definitely red flags there.) Needless to say, she wasn't hired.
in that story of the mother who wants a camera on his child's college room is the kind of mother who shows up in a white gown at the wedding of her son. total psycho.
😂
I'm sure the mother showing up at her son's wedding in a white gown actually did happen.
I think pumps is right tho . I agree w pumps….. If I saw family issues in the person my child wanted to marry , I would def step in … pumps also sees so much in her practice she is essentially helping her child avoid the mess of a future divorce
You two are great . Happy new year! ☘️
Poor teachers and professors! Jeez, their job is tough enough don't add to it plzzzzzz!😭
Just try admitting an adult-baby into the hospital. “Listen lady, I’m asking him/her their pain level. Shut up or go back to the waiting room.”
I mean i went to college and didnt have a cell phone. 😂😂 genx is different
It's not genx. We are the LAST ONES TO NOT have cell phones and be all coddled into pussyhood.
Wow...these reviews are the very BEST!!!
Happy New Years!!! Best wishes for a properous year. God bless America.
25:31 I was thinking the exact same thing. Knowing how the parents are parenting would immediately make me nervous about the child lol. I know it's not fair, but there must be a butt load of entitled adults who still feel like children. Imagine how they act when there is a real crisis! 😐
Oh my gawd, who are these mothers?!! I mean, I know a few, and one for sure who will be in the deans office complaining for her adult kids about water taste and sleep issues. It's gross!! Make it stop. I feel sick. 🤢🤮🤢
Pumps, please don't learn to keep your mouth shut! 😂
I'm not rich, glamorous, and filthy-mouthed like Jennifer and Angela. Because of my shortcomings, I seek them out each day for an ample dose of irreverent commentary and honest news coverage delivered with intelligence and class. Thank you, ladies, for establishing a platform for me to live vicariously! Five-star review.⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
On to crazy parents. In my area boy friend girl friend’s families/parents go on vacation together. In middle school and high school. Plus parents go out to eat at the same place their kids go for pom. Only they do sit at different tables. There is more of this crazy stuff but not enough room to share it.
This episode reminded me of a term, from a short story I read a long time ago, which was "motherly fatuity. " So many of the mothers, who posted their concerns, appear to fall into this category.
If that collegiate helicopter mom installs cameras in her son’s dorm room, she will become horrifically informed of the secondary usage for socks.
She'll want to install a camera that will allow her to read bible verses at him while she sits at HQ monitoring potential nocturnal emissions.
That mother really disturbs me, she probably banned locks on bathroom and bedroom doors at home and waltzed in on anyone changing clothes or trying to pee in peace. 😢
“It takes a lot of f*ing money to look this bad” I lost it 😂