My life after divorce and why I should have built myself as a man before getting to marriage | LNN
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- Опубликовано: 28 май 2024
- When Victor Peace said I Do and took his vows, deep down his heart he really knew his marriage would work but four years down the line things did not go as he expected.
On today’s episode of LNS, he walks us through the real life after divorce, situationships, entanglements, and why he should have built himself first as a man before marriage
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Good morning team LNN
What is your take home from today's conversation with Victor peace?
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Thank you for watching
Good morning too
Lynn I love what you've said and true at times you have to walk the journey before you can talk about it and the day I'll be ready to share my story I pray it will be with you and for the glory and honour of God.
Lynn when is Elvis W and Llwenya coming 😊
I have my own convictions and I love to see a lasting marriage. Having said that, I’ve learned to let everyone live their lives their way.
Each one of us has to face the consequences of their own choices and decisions
From what I know there's no formula. Some people are better off getting married early, some people need more time to find themselves.
True
True this life has no manual
I second it but I suppose experience n maturity plays a big part. No wonder they say say age is just a number.
Yes
I've seen so many people who marry late but they still divorce
I agree that no one should be getting married at 24! Your early 20s are for self-discovery, settling in a career, and at least wait till 26 because true maturity begins as from 25. And please don't attack me if you got married young and have had a successful marriage. That's my opinion, and the reality of life. I declined a marriage proposal at 24, and I think I did that man a favour 😅. Now in my 30s, my mind and career is settled, and I can nurture and give my person peace because life experiences, maturity of age and mind, financial stability and knowing God have a way of making someone grounded.
Agreed
Our parents generation believes in getting married early which I have also never agreed with.
Agreed
I totally agree with you, as much as people say there is no specific 'age' when it comes to marriage, I strongly believe times have really changed. what we want in partners evolves over the years and it's good to take your time.
I believe that Gods time is the best. Yes their is a specific time for marriage,I have seen young people getting married and thrive in life.I don't want to start getting kids when it's over thirty-five with healthy risks associated with it.
I got married early but I never thought that it would work ,I had that inner voice of fear but one thing that made my marriage strong up to now 15years it's building it under the foundation of God.what I know is that anyone who is in marriage they don't wish it to end but if you see one decides to divorce don't judge them ,just encourage that and give them hope the problem with our society today we do judge a lot instead of allowing them to give them a chance to heal.marriage can be made on earth but maintaining it is God.
Actually it is us who maintains marriage, not God. God gave us brains, he finished his work. There's no praying and fasting that will sustain a marriage if the couple is not willing to do the work. I have seen many people saved in very toxic marriages
All they do is pray for their partners to change. They have done everything, waganga, fasting , postors...you name it and nothing changes. God helps us through our journey, he's not a fixer of things.
Well said @sarera
@@cel4lyfhow about both? In trying to emphasize on the relevance of principles and putting in the work, you don't have to rule out the part of divine help in any matter. Besides the efforts of the couple, spiritual attacks against marriages are also a thing. So don't leave everything to God and also don't depend solely on your effort. Can have both.
@@emilykinya2147 Hizo spiritual attacks surprisingly live in Africa, other nations deal with their problems in a different way. We are responsible for our own mess. Some people feel happier blaming it on others or evil spirits. Now if you read well, I said in my first comment that God helps us through the way while working on it. Meaning both.
@@cel4lyf by spiritual attacks I didn't even mean witchcraft and all... Satan can amplify reactions and encouraging bitterness, offense e.t.c. The same way the Holy Spirit helps us in relating with other people, He can guide us with wisdom to resolve issues that would have otherwise escalated. Take an example: God at certain times has asked me to apologize even when I knew I was right. I had to trust Him and that obedience brings a totally different outcome. Here, you see both God's help and a willing person.
You said it is us who maintain marriage. It is us helped by God.
When a man speaks makes me wanna grab my coffee, sit and listen because few men speaks which ain't healthy at all.
I ❤ you Lynn
You two looks amazing. For me I was married at 18 and at 27we divorced having 3kid. I hated this thing of mapema diyo best. It's better to take time and achieve your dream first then marriage to be next😳
you are very right
Me and you sis the same story ,3 kids it's not easy,but I made the best decision to quit coz now am doing abit well but its hard,I hate this thing mapema the best
My take home today, "do not listen to words, listen to actions". Wishing I had known this before.
The right time for marriage is when you are ready,whether this is 18 or 50 or 60.When you are ready that is the right time!
Ur correct karen
@JosephinePendo I think she meant that there's no right time. If you are ready,, go for it
How does one measure readiness? What does one look for to know one is ready?
I got married at 18 and my husband was 20 and by the grace of God we are still happily married 53 years later!!
And how do you know you are ready?Is there a possibility of thinking you are ready and not be?How do you measure the readiness😂😂
Nice to see my primary schoolmate still.soft spoken and himself.
Growth really looks good on you
It's not about age at times I waited for marriage till my mid 30s to a 50 yrs old it was his second marriage 1 week into it I knew it was a mistake divorce 4 yrs later, was homeless in mzanzi yaani marriage is personal. Am happy I walked away broke now God has blessed me soo much
It seems you entered the marriage as an economic refugee.
Learned so much from this young man, been married for over 30 yrs but still more to lean.
Victor sounds like such a lovely, grounded man. I wish him all the best in his future endeavors.
Si umuendee instead of going for bad boyz
I like how he respectfully shares what happened in marriage good diction to respectfully pass on message
Before even listening! I applaud this man! I love it when our men speak out!!! Loving it for Him!
As I honed my photography skills, Victor Peace stood out as a true inspiration and role model among the many professionals in the field.
My husband and I got married very young. He was 24 and I was 23. We have sailed through many storms together and we are still together 38 years later..As they say...age is just a number...what matters is the maturity and commitment.
Yes it's maturity and commitment, I strongly agree
Not for people born in the late 1990s into 2000s
In your generation that formular worked , marriagepreneurship was a thing
@@emeritatee1597look at Soila and curtis how young they are ...... pluto and fel kina wa Jesus , wapendwa Musik heheeee ....
So TRUE. Commitment and maturity from within. I have a brother who got married at 23 and his wife was 21. They are still together strong and knitted . Their children are grown and amazingly they even look younger.
Its a matter of COMMITMENT.
No two marriages or relationships are the same. What makes one person happy might not make someone else happy. But I've found that there's always a way to fix problems. Five years ago, my wife and I were almost getting divorced because of our issues, but we worked through them. It was hard, but we're better for it.
I really get what you're saying, and I genuinely want to find happiness too. I have someone special in my life, and even though we're apart right now, I can't imagine living without her; my love for her is strong. I hope she comes back, and I'm fully dedicated to making it happen. We've tried therapy and other methods to make things better.
Saying goodbye to someone you love so much is never simple, but I got help from a counselor named Aurelia Maisie Goelet, and she kept my marriage together.
Your guidance is valued. I'll immediately seek her out online. Appreciate it. I'm hopeful that implementing this method will also bring me success; I miss her dearly.
welcome
By watching this I have also discovered something about myself. Thanks for the good work
It takes God to sustain a marriage no
matter what ages. We got married at an early age but l would advise people to take time and learn each other before commitment. We are now celebrating our 44th year together but it has not been easy. Takes a lot of sacrifice on both ends.
This was an amazing conversation. Thank you for speaking your truth and being so authentic Victor Peace❤❤❤.
Lynn, you are an amazing and skilled interviewer❤❤❤.
One of the best episodes I've ever followed. 👍 thumbs up LNS
All in All marriage has no manual, i also got married at an early age but am here still going strong courtesy of God's favour, i can say God has been faithful from the word go.its not that we know much about marriage but God's favour is taking us through a step at a time
Victor sounds like a really fun person to hang out with. He is funny.
Uko sawa, I love yr humour, uko so lively.
Make sure that you have your whole life first before you become someone's else wife/husband
Absolutely 💯
💯
Love thyself first,Yu can't give what Yu don't have .
Thank you Lynn for making content for us to take in as you make more in Australia
This is a amazing conversation at right time, it flash back when my first love after finishing my form four he wanted to marry me but his target was to impregnate me then his mission could be actualized. But guess what I was so clever enough, I looked mylife and promises i had with myself and mum and I had enough reasons to chase for my career .Here i am happy managed to do things i wished, enjoyed my youthful life and focused on my career.
The sad thing is everytime i bump my x his like he made wrong decision to marry another lady early to show me that he was serious to his word's and now has 3 kids but not happy living because of the kids 😔 😪. Now as i listen to victor story and am like thanks God i decided to search for me first.
Emotionally, physically psychologically and fncy am prepared to settle.❤️
Glad to know you chose yourself. I did so too and self discovery will never be a loss. God is faithful.
Exactly what I did,yeah I lost him,but looking back I thank God I made that choice koz cjui niseme nn to bring out clear.
To me I still insist take your time,at the end of Day everything got consequences
Team Victor Peace. I love his content.
Broke up after 9yrs of being together and a 6 yr old son. I couldn't take anymore of whatever he was doing so I walked away. It's been 6 months and I'm still in denial. I even gained weight but I've managed to give my son a stable life. It's really hard😢
May God see you through
Make sure your son has access to his father, regardless of your relationship with him.
@@Lamarveille He does. I've never affected his relationship with his dad. I'd never separate them on purpose. I also don't talk negatively about his dad when he's around.
@@kaliisakaita5831 Amen
@@graciexellari7905 Wise woman 😊 Life will go on may you win in life.
"The beauty of wisdom is in the brevity of words "
This is what benjamin zulu keeps telling the youth.
Thank you for this story,am going through alot right now but this so encouraging
Habari za Asubuhi 🇹🇿🇹🇿🇹🇿🇹🇿nipo hapa kujiimarisha
The vibe and energy between you guys❤superb😊
Good show... Lynn is glowing 🙂
Rusungu nayo!! Brilliant young man there!! Keep doing you!
If you grew up in an environment that was unfavorable heal first before marriage.... Benjamin Zulu in his book healing inner self.
Such an amazing conversation 😍 👏 ❤️ Love Victor's content ❤
Goodmorning team lynne,tuned in kama kawaida
Such an amazing episode ..Lyn you owe us an Episode with Coach susan Wanjiku ...Missing the agribusiness shows already 😅😅😅🙌
Marriage is the only thing that gives you a certificate before you go through a test😊let me grab my coffee on this resting day.
I went for the test first 😂
Birth certificate?
😂😂
Wedding certificate @@Jojo-pv3uf
@@Jojo-pv3ufmarriage certificate
The problem is not the spouse is the unhealed childhood trauma that causes friction, I wish this would be a discussion on our African community where people marry before they are ready mentally, emotionally , financially and spirituality.I mean before you even know your path and purpose.
I couldn't agree more on this
Exactly 💯..the problem is unhealed trauma
💯 CORRECT.
And people refuse to acknowledge that those love gaps and traumas ,only God can fill them,only Jesus can replace that lov you missed at childhood
Good morning team Lynn 🤛 Everything happens with a reason cute man don't worry 🥰🥰🥰
My take home......
Be you, work on you,...you can't give what you don't have...
Mimi Lynn, support me get a washing machine....of all chaos I do at home....hiiii ndio inanimaliza aki......
@LynnNgugi I always love your shows. You should have seen me loughing as you guys lough.
Victor was happy the entire time. He was all smiley and was giving the positive energy. I need to know what he takes to keep him this happy.
He is single, again.
This guy is me hata mtu anaogelela hizo story namtoa kwa life yangu
My healing nah important
I broke up after9yrs being together with my first born kn class3 now in form 3 and boy class5 and i don't regret now its 9yrs alone with my 2kids taking care of them alone and Gid have never left us alone
He is sooo sweet! lol throwing the phone away after posting 🤣
Good show. I'm old and learning.❤
This show was very good. It made my day.
Nimefika... Good morning team ❤❤
He has a very beautiful smile 🫠
I was waiting for this episode
He is giving Phil Karanja's vibe and he is Karanja . So eloquent.
Never force things, what's meant to be will be.listen to actions More than the words
The beautiful Lynn ad always much love from uganda
Beautiful ❤❤❤conversation
I really enjoyed this conversation, Victor seems like a chilled guy, thank you Lynn for bringing us these raw and unfiltered contents. When people get married, they expect it to be forever but it doesn't always go that way, so allow yourself to go through all those emotions and don't force yourself to 'heal' overnight. Alafu he is giving me DJ Pinye vibes sijui kwanini LOL😀😀
Great conversation
Got marriage at the age of 22 and dropped out of college for the next 13 years were my most painful years of my life. I thank God i got courage and ended it. It depends on the motive of marriage and the parties involved.
Good morning team LNN❤
Mariage, i think, is when u both agree u can handle and both feel ready for it , its abt energy being in sync especially spiritual values to sustain u when things get tough.
You just said it,me after divorce one thing I longed for it I mean I was ready ,I never regreted my move, and after I muted I don't even care about the other person coz I looked back and remembered those crazy nights, abuse and all sheets I really needed freedom and am doing well for real
Morning team Lynn.
This guy is cute 🥰🥰🥰. Talk of his smile 🤩🤩
Good morning team Lynn ❤❤❤
This guy was our dh captain in thika high school.Good talk.
My fav is on Lynn wow, love love him 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
Normalize healing before you get married this applies to both male and female
Just because ur out their having sex that's not a grantee that ur mature to start a family
The other thing build ur self before u get married
This I'd trueeeeee
He has beautiful smile,weh i don't regrets waiting and building myself, until am ready
The smile is infectious😂😂you just smile back
Am in love with voice
Thank you Lynn.
Never force things, what's meant to be will be .Listen to actions more than the words😢
Good morning Madam Lynn
Good morning beautiful family ❤
"The beauty of wisdom is in the gravity of Words". Wise saying
Good morning team
I have learned something from this story
Abit late but never missed ❤ loving this
Love from Rwanda ❤️❤️
Hahaha Victor is such a cool content creator ❤
Nko ndani.... nipitieni tujengane....
Yes we are not failure's, it can only get better
Please ask Rammzy if he is willing to come on the show. As men believe he has an important experience for us that we can learn from.
LOL
Eiii, pass
He has done many interviews out there
He is everywhere on RUclips giving interviews.
My take home has been, do we ever think if our parents when we divorce or separate? This is huge, this is heavy. I have mixed feelings about this but this is legit.
For today's calibre of women that we have, it's not a good thing for a man to even be ready for marriage 🙏
I regret too I could have built myself too before getting married
Sometimes we just need to discover or find ourselves alone
Watching from New Jersey
Marriage is not for everyone kama haiwork don't force it... myself i can't wed again
Weuh just invest in yourself b4 entering into a marriage it's like uko ni jela bt enways thankx Lynn for this good advice
That's true am in that real jail and don't know what to do just trusting God
Way too many likes from Victor 😅 glad he found peace on the other side.
Have learnt alot
i know this guy from tiktok nice story
Brother to Moreen Ngigi
Truly I also had no business getting married that young.
I think its all about being ready and marrying someone you cannot live without. Some people get married for all the wrong reasons and hope it will work out, but unfortunately we know the end result.
Are there people you can't live without though if we are being honest
@@faithwainaina8504 yes my dear. My late boyfriend was the one person I knew I couldn't live without. I've not been able to find anyone that I love as much
For sure when people breakup they tend to do things just to prove to the other person that everything is moving no well yet sometimes they are seriously breaking inside
I hope he heals from that whole ordeal. We saw it coming way back from experience
who are these we😮😮😮
Tuned