Never Said I Love You with Zarna Garg | The Downside #83
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- Опубликовано: 26 июл 2024
- Stand-up comedian Zarna Garg gives tips on how to lie to your Uber driver and admits that she’s never said “I love you” to her husband. She also shares the downsides of growing up in India, being radicalized by Archie comics and bootleg episodes of Good Times, losing your mother at 14 and immediately having your father try to marry you off, running away and having to develop a sense of humor so her friends parents would want to house her, having a daughter who’s majoring in ceramics, how white people ruined yoga, and whether she should have gone with the arranged marriage.
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I wrote on chat "I love you, pa" to my dad recently. The silence was awkward, and I got back a "Same to you"... Indian culture...
Hahahaha this is absolute gold... I somehow imagined the scene with my dad.
But we still get kisses on cheeks, hugs, many blessings. It's true our way of expressing love is different because for an American father expressing love is kissing his child but for my father like patting on my foreheadead or rubbing slowly on my head is a way of expressing his love towards me
😂
Did he take half hour to type "same to you"? 😂😂
@@kundrapuvasanth5746 i don't think Americans kiss their parents on lips
She is hilarious so glad I saw the snippet on TikTok and came to watch this
Me too lol 😂
Me too
Same
+1
Same except RUclips shorts not TikTok
To leave India as a 15 year old and still be so connected with your roots is admirable. While I am much younger than Zarna and can never even imagine the kind of journey she has had, I relate with her so much!
India today is very different from how a lot of the Indian Americans think. In most cases, their families have emigrated back in the 70s and 80s so they tend to have a lot more heavy-handed upbringing. They grew up way more conservative, and hold on to a lot more of those values than an average urban Indian living in the country
💯💯
Seriously, it creates different or may I say negative perspective for the people who never visited or don't know anything about india in particular.
Agreed.
I'm indian but still the Stories of her marriage sounds so crazy to me. I guess it depends on the region, I'm from the north-eastern region of india and our culture is quite different from the north. But we too have it bad because of patriarchy but it isn't this normalised and crazy.
It's extremely convenient for many people to simplify India. India has so much diversity and that diversity pervades not just the dress we wear, what we eat, and how we dance but every other aspect as well. People definitely forget that
i also feel the same. and i am from south. Plus she is older and has kids it might be the generation gap too
I'm from North India, (Haryana) and tbh, i don't relate to whatever she said at all, sure i find her funny, but this whole thing about not saying I love yous and the marriage age was sooooo bizarre for me. Me and my brother have been saying I love to our mom everyday before we leave for school and even kiss her cheeks sometimes (although I've never heard my parents saying I love you to each other at all) and my dad hugs me so much, always encouraging me, i cuddle with my mom, dad and brother whenever I'm back home on my college break. And the thing about marriage, none of family members have been married before 18, my parents were 22-mom and 27-dad and same was for my dad's two other siblings and his cousins (my mom is the only child). And about mother in laws, well, i don't know about others, but my dadi(paternal grandma) has always been very kind nd caring towards my mom, she notices whenever my mom's stressed and asks her to rest and also if she has lost some weight dadi makes laddoos for her to gain that healthy weight back, plus my mom's a little anaemic due to a heart surgery when she was 4, so my dadi always prepares pomegranate especially for her. Maybe, because her dad came from a poor conservative (as she told, he was a rags to riches) so he might hold those views still. And also, about education and all, women in my family are all well educated and working, even my dadi was a teacher, considering my dadi's generation is the same generation as her dad's so that's a bit wierd for me to imagine
NE is completely different from mainland india the Groom paysssss dowry sometimes
@@scandalouss1073 there is no mainland india
As an Indian here is my take on saying "I Love You" to friends and family.
Saying I Love you feels odd. To explain what odd here means, a good analogy would be the word "Thank you".
You have one word in Hindi "Dhanyawad" or "shukriya" in Urdu same as Thank you.
If you say it to your friend it gives an impression that you are not close to that person.
Thank you is something I would say if my boss gives me a raise, or if I get a prize in school.
IT'S VERY FORMAL, It lacks the warmth, its lip service, it is a transaction. You give me something here is thank you in return.
Much like "Have a great day" something I heard in America every time I bought something. After a few times, it just felt like it's something that people say, you didn't know if they mean it. Maybe they do.
If my Mum or friend gave me a Phone for my bday, a hug and a smile or the excitement translate to thank you in a friend or family member's mind.
In the same way, saying I love you feels extremely formal, the words don't really connect in the way you want them to. It's uncomfortable.
Your mom gives milk when you are studying for your exams at 3 am and she hasn't sept after a hard day's work. or if you are in trouble and your friend says, no problem I'll take care of it is I Love you in action.
Now yes, it's far more common to say thank you and I love you in India. I'll go out on a limb here and says if you ever said thank you to close people, many would take offence to it (like they do things as a favour). I love you would only embarrass them.
We say Thank you and I love you through actions, words just seem hollow.
With over a billion people, one cant make a blanket statement, but this is one view.
Agree 100%
Yeah completely agree with you. I always say to newly formed good friend (at least from my side) that don't say Thank you. It feels like distant.. i never said to my mother i love you or hug her after leaving for another town.. just touched her feet.. but i can see that I am the most precious thing for her.. Indians showed love through actions not by words..
You are absolutely right bro.
Perfect ! Perfect ! Perfect!
Indians have issues with words like love and sex
India has definitely changed a lott!! I am a girl and very privileged. Of course I have also seen financial problems many times in my family but regarding education, respect, love , freedom and acceptance, I have got everything and I am happy being an Indian ❤️
Same here, my dad is from rural India, with limited education opportunities, yet he and my grandpa never asked for a boy. They celebrated my birth and my life by default. Had financial issues, had been through crippling accident. And even my relatives mocked my dad that he should have had another child, as now the first one is useless. But he has always been my support system.
I live to make him proud and care for him
The first time I ever saw a human being admit to being priviledged
I thank you for your honesty, you are a great person
@@vulk7183 priviledged is a relative and a hollow word. No one should say something so vague. You say if you are rich, or healthy or whatever you have. If you earned it, its an acomplishment. Its not a priviledge.
@@mewtubeofficial How do you earn education, access to basic food/nutrition, healthcare, etc.? Are you saying that all those children who don't have any of those just didn't earn it? And then when those kids who didn't get the basic stuff become adults, now it's just their fault that they are the way they are? Your take lacks depth.
She must have come from a very poor/backward/conservative community though she had money. Because my dad's family is from a very humble background and even 40 years ago, all my aunts got their bachelor's degree and were married in their mid 20s(23/24). My father married at 29. This was the convention in our community and they weren't even middle class back then. She was pushed into a child marriage even as per the conventions of that time(it was illegal), and I don't think she fully understands the weight of that.
💯
I'm sure she's talking about her own experiences, but what she's saying about women's education being discouraged and married off early was a 100 years ago. 😅😂 Even a 100 years ago, my grandmother who was born in 1921, married at 23 and studied to qualify as a teacher. Everyone is prochoice in India, abortion is legal across the country, climate change is not a debate and religion & science are never at odds with each other. That's India.
@@visharadkende8838 haha who has? But it's sad to see a picture painted this way about India after so much progress we have made in the last 75 years.
I agree with you Mahima ji. Her's is really a one-off case. After all, a 16 yo girl running away from her father to America sounds revolutionary to me even today, let alone 30 years back...😂😂
Some things to keep in mind -
● This happened to her around 30 years ago, but Indian society has become much more liberal now with respect to children's agency for marriage.
● She mentioned in passing that girls were discouraged to read and study. I can vouch for the fact that the situation has radically improved now in India. Girls are actively encouraged to pursue their education.
● You must keep in mind that there was really an extraordinarily bad situation in her family with her mother passing away, which really led to the complicated situation with her father. Still, her father should have given some more thought and time before reaching a decision.
● Regarding her judgement about India's rightward turn in the past decade, I would say to her what other Indians say - You're an NRI and so you don't know...
Pro choice. Isn't it a particular sex they choose ? So the government and society stay silent in the name of Pro choice?
@@mr.gaming6277 Yes you're right, but it is illegal for the doctor to reveal the gender though. India's sex ratio has risen in the last 3 years, there are more females than males 1020:1000
When Zarna said " INDIA has problems of it's own and it was never invaded by AMERICA" . In my mind i was like hello did she forgot that INDIA was a colony of the BRITISH for 200 years. Sure INDIA would even had the problems but not the social psychological and financial ones which persists till date and not to forget they put two nuclear country at logger heads with each other since the time they left till date. No offence but that coming from a person who claims to be an indian is a bit unsettling giving the horrors that people went through.
And they made it look like Russia is a threat for India like bruh Indians trust Russia more than America 🤣
Exactly. Most of the things she said were exaggerated and some of them were said without giving a thought to it.
@@krushna4181 that's just how regular conversations work though. i wouldn't take a podcast all serious and as a real source of information. this isn't meant to be an informative podcast after all. but yeah i see how misinformation can be a problem!
America and British are two different things...some ppl can't differentiate between them...but India wasn't invaded by Americans they were Britishers...
@@divyasrashti2536 america used to be a part of the british rule
Ok I’m also Indian but my mom is very affectionate. She would always tell you she loves us and hugs and kiss us. I’m 22 and she still does it. And I appreciate that a lot and I am also the same. I think it depends household to household. And people have their own love language.
Nah dawg u r obv frm sobo
Aww
absolutely. It’s that everyone has a different love language and as a mother, I believe that it’s my job to figure out what my kids’ love language is and what they need, to then try to meet their needs within reason and to my best ability. Because we know (with science) that healthy secure attachment is incredibly important for the health and well-being of the individual in the longer term. It not only directly equal better health outcomes, but it also affects how that child develops relationships when they grow up. It could be the difference between raising a supportive spouse or someone who takes their frustrations out on their spouse and children, or someone who develops substance abuse as a coping mechanism. Just because it has been that way for a long time, doesn’t mean it needs to or should stay that way. So I’m glad that your mother meets that need for you.
Just so you know people don't go making assumptions about Indian society after listening to her life story.
My mom grew up in India so the culture was a big part of my upbringing and it makes her feel extra comforting to me. Like she's one of my moms old funny ass friends from India. Definitely gonna share her stand up with my mom! Thanks for putting me on to her
Every Indian who left India and lives in USA portrays an overtly grim picture of India to justify their reality of leaving.
I mean things are pretty shit over here.
@@ben_dover33 yes but like I mean it's not Afghanistan 😑
@@ben_dover33 things r sh*t becoz ppl r sh*t.
@@ben_dover33 I don't know which shanty town you live in but I am living my best life. So, stop generalising personal experiences.
@@ben_dover33 actually no. Indian kids are not sprayed with bullets at school. We increased literacy rate from 13% to 65% post independence. We invented 2 vaccines during pandemic. So India is doing fantastic, given its grim starting point in 1947.
Some things to keep in mind -
● This happened to her around 30 years ago, but Indian society has become much more liberal now with respect to children's agency for marriage.
● She mentioned in passing that girls were discouraged to read and study. I can vouch for the fact that the situation has radically improved now in India. Girls are actively encouraged to pursue their education.
● You must keep in mind that there was really an extraordinarily bad situation in her family with her mother passing away, which really led to the complicated situation with her father. Still, her father should have given some more thought and time before reaching a decision.
● Regarding her judgement about India's rightward turn in the past decade, I would say to her what other Indians say - You're an NRI and so you don't know...
● I can agree with her about the "I love you" thing in Indian society. It's especially true of the middle class...
● Hers is really a one-off case. After all, a 16 yo girl running away from her father to America sounds revolutionary to me even today, let alone 30 years back...😂😂
I kind of have to disagree with your last point. Girls running away from their homes is uncommon today but not in old times. Girls who fell in love, girls who were being forced into marriage and other things like love jihad existed
Point #4 - She is right, the rightward shift is near fanatical levels in India right now.
Just last week a mentally challenged man was KILLED because he was mistaken to be a Muslim.
A Muslim man was beaten to death in police custody, and when the community protested - the house of this DEAD MAN was demolished, and his wife and 8th class daughter were arrested. Along with demolition of 40 other houses in the community. So you kill a man in police custody, then demolish his house and arrest his wife and daughter for protesting.
@@mrgyani dear mahagyani bro..why u only see lynch of only muslim ppl . Why u put a cellotape on your eyes while hearing a news about Hindu man lynching...ahh..i got that u are blind left leaning guy.
Pls go and check out the story of kairana where minority Hindu sold their homes nd land due to threats of Muslim majority
Good one 👍🏼
(Basically I had multiple thoughts and comments before summing it up with only the above comment, after reading other heated discussions taking the topic to whole new level, and I just forgot what I was gonna say..😅)
To people reading him, just know that things haven't changed much on the ground in the last 30 years. But yes things definitely have changed if it comes to agency to get married and women education. But there is no radical change.
Most of the things you read in comment section is from upper caste Hindus. They have no idea about Indian landscape, they get highly offended when international media shows dirty looking, poor neighborhoods in India, which is probably more than 3/4rth of India.
And regarding right wing shift in Indian politics, it's extremely bad here. The radicalization of Hindu youth in past decade has been astoundingly awful. There are lynchings happening, every other day there is a hate crime or a religious maniac openly declaring -- okay I don't wanna say because RUclips will delete my comment if I write those horrible things.
I was born in 90s and I saw a decade of tremendous growth in India, socially, culturally, politically,.. Just imagine a poor country in Asia ranked 28th in global democracy index and US was 22 at that time in 2014 before right wing govt came in. And now every development indicator is down hill..
Just wanted to clarify this.. So people don't form opinion just by reading this guy
I genuinely love their friendship. This was a great podcast and thanks Zarnagarg for being so open and vulnerable and telling your life story and gianmarco for being so curious and a great conversationalist lol heart
My dad used to send me railway tickets to come back home in post while I was away at college and would write behind it - "We love you Betu - Pappa and Mummy!" (Betu is my dad's sweeter way of calling Beta(basicallymeans son, but can be used to call daughter too eventhough correct term for daughteris Beti)). I tell my husband all the time "I love you!". Specially when he is going out to office or tour.
38:50 and this is the reason why you came here....
Thank you
I am an Indian woman and I say the word "I love you to my family members" Here people control themselves to show love but I don't like it at all. We should sometimes remind our loved ones that yes we are there for them and we love them. It's bizzare if I control my emotions like Zarina said.
Exactly
Fought her father for the arrange marriange and asking her kids to do arrange marriage.
I am getting to understand this arrange marriage system how it survives for so long.
She regrets it. She realizes she was naive
I wish her siblings had talked with her father about her continuing education and marriage much later, as that man had lost his wife and a lot of communication could have fared them better.
She was young but her siblings weren't.
Respect and admiration for you Zarna Ji, for donning that awesome bindi and being hilarious all along. Ever so gracious.
when you are on survival mode you do not care about fear, 100% true!! Thanks for the encouragement, you are helping and providing hope for so many of us, and making us laugh, thanks man!!
I feel so blessed that things are changing in India...I have openion and it matters more than by brother. I got to study in the best school in India and my family loves me so much..so thankful ♥️♥️
I just discovered this channel a few days ago but I've grown to really enjoy gianmarco. He has an amazing ability to say his opinion in a funny yet powerful way. When she was going on about how it's all personal responsibility him saying "awe great I'm glad you feel that way because I just tested positive" was the perfect response.
I like her but sounds like when she says " india" she means "a very conservative household ".
None of my parents & grandparents describes that much sexism for them growing up but we were middle class hindus. We say we love each other ALL the time
are you from Mumbai?
I suppose natural but so weird how some folks immigrate at a younger age and then that’s just what their home country is to them frozen in some kind of timeless amber.
More like time travel into the past. Even in 70s and 80s India wasn't like what she's describing.
This hasn't been my experience. My bf says "I love you" all the time. Even his mom tells me she loves me every time I talk to her! Maybe this is regional.
He just moved to Canada 7 months ago but before then he'd never left India. His family still lives there. They're proud Indians.
India is the most culturally diverse country in the world so I guess no generalization could be accurate all the time.
That is just them mimicking your culture and language to make you feel loved. I can bet they don't say it to each other. Indians say it to each other on rare occasions for eg if it's for the first time. 🤣
and the thing is that her perspective stems from her life in India 30 years ago. a lot has changed since then
@@abcdefgh-rq3gq no you fool, India has a huge variety the kind of India zarna talks about has changed a lot in the last 30-40 years.
99% indian don't say love you 😂
Ask them if it was that way 2 generations back.
She's hilarious but just putting it out there that the india she's describing doesn't exist anymore. This is only for the non indian viewers so that they don't get a misinformed opinion of the country 🙌
‘Not anymore’ is bit far fetched. These kind of cases are lesser in number but still exists. One of my friend went through the same situation not too long away.
@@babilabub agreed. Unfortunately cases like this still do happen in the country. I only meant to point out the way she said things like 'no one knows about the minimum legal marriage age etc in india.' That's not true. Plus , she herself said that she hasn't been to India in over 2 decades. The diaspora tends to live in the past when it come to these things (it's not their fault tho). They definitely aren't the right people to go to when you wanna find out what a country is like TODAY.
@@1dpriya The bottom line is (sadly) it is still happening. I hope when we see these situations happening, we lend a hand to show them what is right and what is wrong. Peace. ✌🏼
I saw this interview on reels and I really enjoyed the podcast and the guest shes amazing. 💞
I didn't think I could listen to an hour plus convo. these guys are great.
We often express love by saying love you to parents, siblings, friends as well! India is changing and so does the perceptions!!
While I would say that i love her work and I'm sorry for everything she went through, I also can't relate to what she's saying at all, as an Indian who is born and raised in India I have never seen people having a problem with educated girls not only in this generation but even my mom's generation (which is the same as her's) in fact during the whole arrange marriage matchmaking stuff it was preferred that the girl should at least have done her under graduation and about the age difference between couples I was shocked when she said that 10 years is normal because from where I come its actually quite frowned down upon, also the age of consent and marriage in India for women is 18( now changed to 21) and this has been so since independence (1947) even my grandmother mother married at 19 (who is most probably the same generation as her father) and she continued her studies after marriage also and all of this when we come from the middle class, she belonged to the upper elite class and usually women from that class are the most educated and liberated women I have ever come across. I sympathize with her and feel bad for her but that doesn't give her the right to generalize a diverse population of 1.4 billion people
Exactly! 🙏🏻🙌🏻
Yeah same my mother's a little older than her and she even comes from a much more poorer background than her but education was never discouraged. I guess different people different experiences. But she shouldn't generalize and say things like she would be killed for saying these things and such. That kinda dampened my mood.
Tbh...it depends from area to area... India is such a large country that it can't be generalize my mother really got a good education and married at the age of 26 back then...but most of my mother's friends passed class 12 and gave up education got married at an age of 19-20 she is just telling her story and it's kinda obvious that even if girls are allowed to be educated career was never a priority most of the time it was "ladka kama to rha h" even in today's era there are not much boundations for girl's education still if she doesn't have a career no body cares...and 40 years back she had courage to speak for herself and it should be appreciated
@@divyasrashti2536 I'm not saying that what she said didn't happen or that i don't appreciate her courage for standing up for herself , I honestly sympathize with her story but what I don't like is how she is generalizing the entire country by saying that girls weren't allowed to this or that and even if having a career was never given much importance (which is obviously wrong) for a woman, education was never discouraged and by education I mean the basic secondary level education.
Another thing I didn't like was her saying that women usually got married around 15-16 because while that might be true in rural areas and some urban regions it was not true for a very big part of the population, especially for the upper and middle class (which she was from) and she mentioned that there were no laws prohibiting it ,this disturbed me the most because if anything there are various laws prohibiting child marriage, she was making it seem like there was nothing the government was doing to prohibit it.
I don't like how she's portraying India in such a negative light and as such a backward country, yes we have our issues but which country doesn't and we are actively trying to resolve them.
You’re kidding right? You’re saying she doesn’t have the right to comment?
My cousin sister (who got married at 22) was married to a guy 10 years older than her. Another cousin was forced to be married at 17 a few years ago, to a guy in his late 20s. We’re from a really literate family. Went to the best schools in Bangalore and come from a upper middle class background. So yeah, you can’t generalise your opinion for the entire population either. She’s representing a part of the population for sure. Don’t invalidate her experience
10 minutes into the video and I'm really enjoying this. She's really funny.
This is amazing!!
This was a really good conversation I enjoyed good work
This was SO good. Great guest, amazing real life stories.
this was a really great episode! she's so funnyyyy
I subscribed to this channel in hopes of seeing more of her after that "dead mother-in-law" short video. Not disappointed at all.
Oh god she was a bad trigger for me. Whatever she was saying was something I have never seen. No one wants an uneducated wife anymore.
There are different worlds in India. Like meghalaya is maternal while north west has patriarchy. Bengal has shaktas while Vaishnavas are common in middle
It's her experience
I am 26. I am an Indian living in Canada for 7 years now. And my parents have never said ‘I love you’ to me. And I have said it to my mom maybe like once or twice. And I absolutely hate it that we never express love in our family. My bf on the other side, similar backgrounds, his family very openly says it to each other. So indian parents, please tell your kids you love them. Say it out loud.
Revisit this post when u r 34-35ish
Saying love u and showing love are two different things..My parents never told love u to me,but deep down i know they will sacrifice anything for me.
@@vijayraj4914 everyone has different experiences. Nobody is obligated to agree with what I think.
No need to say it. It shows in their actions and ours too. Whatever the parents are doing they are doing for their childrens.
19:58 Love is expressed through food.
Loved this episode 😍
I honestly agree, food is the love language. If you give me food, i love you already😂
39:17 i just can't with this part have to keep rewinding again and again. This has me laughed hard 😂😂
Do come and visit india someday. It's nothing like described in the video
In terms of religious fanaticism? It totally is. But in terms of social conservatism & modernity - maybe not so much.
Religion fanaticism😂.
If you are living here then you should know what we are up against and how people of a certain community are just faking it that they can coexist with the majority community while it's clear that they can't, they split this country in the past and are trying to do it again.
Our adversaries inside our society and in the border share the common ideology of destroying the majority community. So, it is quite natural to develop a social shield for the protection of dharma as well as a sense of nationalism.
But You won't get it.. you sound woke.😅
I don't personally have the time to perform any religious practices or norms in my day to day life, but I totally respect and get it why people are now-a-days very defensive about their dharma, because they know what danger they are in who they are up against.
I came here from TikTok and I learned so much from the comments section.
She’s hilarious I had to see the full interview. But I’ve a need to learn and understand different cultures and communities, I just learned some things.
The problem here is that she is generalizing Indian society based on her personal experience.
"The things I say here would've gotten me killed in India" 🤦🏻♂️
I don't know from where she got that idea from if she left India at a very early age.
Exactly! Just checked out her channel and most of her videos don't make sense at all. I don't know why people find her funny. It's the same old stereotypical sarcasm that Indians don't study arts or girls can't go to college (not sure if it counts as sarcasm or not at this point)
@@vidhi1239 I checked some of her clips too and it's definitely not sarcasm. Have you watched other Indian stand up comedian abroad like Hasan Minhaj, Akash Singh, Russell etc,? Even they slander India in their gigs.
I remember Vir Das trying to get spotlight in America without being an a&&hole but failed and when he started slandering India he was an instant hit. I think there's a whole global ecosystem which promotes anti India contents and demotes Pro India contents, a couple of years ago I thought it was just a conspiracy theory now I definitely think there's don't truth to it.
WaPo articles by librandu aunty journalist are their source of news from India and they keep repeating these in their eco chambers. They have hardly 1% idea of how diverse India is.
@@1alltimeuser really diverse give me break. You guys are ready with swords to attack any church or masjid. Open your eyes.
Ikr. Never have I experienced this in India n ive said some crazy inappropriate shit!
This is gold!!
So weird how her reality of India and a completely different version could be true at the same time. Like her India and mine are still coexisting and they're completely different yet similar because I see the kinds of attitudes and ways of life she is talking about but a much more watered-down version of it. Though her version is still present and its presence transcends regions and affluence. Also her philosophy of being selfish is very relatable as that is basically what most Indian parents want you to be and it comes out of love usually.
THANK YOU. It's not "either/or"; it's "both + and".
I think what she said depends on different places. In my place in India, I lead a similar life like I now spend in America. The only thing is no more is parents money, food, climate. I have to work my hell out to make money. (also miss neighbor aunties watching what you are doing 😂)
The experiences she had might be limited to her family but even 30 years ago women didn't get married that early. It wasn't a "India" thing. We had Indira Gandhi as Prime minister in 1960's who was a like female dictator actually running the country.
The liberal-conservative ideology of America doesn't really correlate exactly in India. We have conservatives and liberals believing in common values like education and climate change. We are too big of a country with so many ethnic, religious, cultural and language differences to have just two parties. There's a large spectrum of ideologies. But when push comes to shove people will forget these differences & work on common cause.
I saw a tiktok and came to watch really enjoyed it
Love Zarna, but she really needs to visit India today. While some families might be the same, most people are more contemporary than being insinuated here.
Also the legal marriage age is 21.
I grew up in a middle class house with pink floyd and led zep playing every weekend , and my late teens were spent listening to goth and emo music and seeing heavy metal bands play from different universities during shows over the weekend.
my mother was a teacher and they put emphasis on studies and arts and my dad was an engineer,also they totally drove in the fact I need to be a financially independent woman. While I understand that this might not be everyone’s journey, neither is hers.
PS she is accurate about the rise of the right wing
Please name one right wing party in India ,from my knowledge even bjp is not right wing ,yes there is presence of left wing but that too in one state ,in India there is no left or right wing
Just because YOU had that kind of upbringing doesn't mean others had too. If you want to know this is what privilege looks like. The level of ignorance in your comment makes me want to show you millions of young girls fighting for the most basic right to even complete their studies. Just because you had everything doesn't mean all the girls or most of them had even a percentage of your privilege.
I think you oversimplify India.
@@minikaur4993 But is privilege gender specific? I mean, I've seen lots of kids(both guys and girls) working odd jobs.
And you're right about the rise of right wing and that's the way it should be. 70 years of left supremacy had to end somewhere, either up or down. It chose it's path.
After this episode i really did need the little bit of optimism from the "You better count your blessings" segment 😂
This is a masterpiece!
39:19 Russell's wheeze cracks me up
Amazing 😂😂
59:00 The politics talks. Reality is, after seeing what happened in Russia Ukraine war, USA is a much larger threat to India. I don't think she knows anything about Indian politics.
Lmao, is it because you fear getting sanctioned for the fascism and religious fanaticism?
@@mrgyani Fear of sanctions 😂😂 Nobody gives a shit to US sanctions. Europe is still funding Russians in war by purchasing 80% of their oil and other commodities. India now started importing oil from Russia, puchased S400. But India fear sanctions of course. Talking about fascism, is covering your face and head banned in India or Europe?
Also Russell’s hand going in front of the camera tripped me out at first 😂
My mother is in her 60s and she got married when she was 20, even my aunts got married in their early 20s. We come from a poor background and yet most of the women from 1980s in my family are highly educated.
She might have been born in a unfortunate family and might have suffered because of that but that doesn't mean that everyone everywhere is the same.
I don't know what she gets from painting India in such a bad light. 🤷🏻♂️
Hi guys, Zarna is extremely funny and witty. But, unfortunately, her story is just a her experience of a small part of India and perhaps from a time when she still lived in India.
It's not this bad anymore!
How can you say that. Dafuq. It's not all bad but it is bad
@@Thecooltransition it's bad everywhere everything has its own pros and cons
@@vedantpatil7661 it was my response to it's not bad anymore!!! Child marriage is still a thing in villages. Female foeticide and honour killings, rape and killings happen often. Now a new moster called love jihad has been created to harras women and who marry out of their religion.
@@Thecooltransition As an Indian, it's actually not bad. Not perfect but not bad. Currently live in germany and can say the same for germany too. So your comment makes no sense whatsoever
@@Thecooltransition lol most women in the world have that fear
I once had uber driver take me to jfk, it was one hour ride! At the beginning of the ride he had a wife, by the end of the ride he was single and totally convinced me that my boyfriend is no good and I should not trust him. He slipped his business card in my hand and told me to contact him when I come back. I never talked to uber driver again if I was alone in the car.
Honestly, her opinions is subjective and bounded to her family and some, her stories are based off the Indian Society when she was 16 and left india..
I would say now India is much much more different, like her story is not so far from the truth but is also biased as well!!
I would agree with her opinions 100% maybe if this video was from 10 years ago!
Very sad story 🥺 , I feel very blessed after hearing that. I love your humor "u rock" ❤️.
My mom's story is very similar to that of Zarna in respect of being super rich and the very sudden passing of her parent. But she wasn't 14-15 when she got married...She was 23-24 (after she finished her PG) and I think they are both similar in age....maybe my mom is 2-3 years younger....
THIS is my first foreign podcast I'm going to watch beginning to end
I got here through RUclips shorts and it was really nice, though I don't know all three of you, I just got interested after watching an Indian aunty with two white guys and cracking jokes (sorry not trying to be rude but that's the truth)... The things she told was pretty much correct but on the topic marriage age it depends on the time period, region, society and your family... Right now the legal age for marriage is 21 for both man and woman which used to be 18 for woman and 21 for man...
I'm giving example of my family, my grandmother from my father's side got married when she was around 15 or 16 and my grandmother from my mother's side around 20 and both of them were educated because both of their fathers were educated... As for my mother and father's generation only my eldest aunts from both the sides got married when they were 19 or 20 but after that no one in by family got married under 20, actually now it's 25... It's not like I haven't seen girls getting married as soon as they get 18 but below 18 I haven't seen one... (By the way I'm 26, was about to get married in a rich family when I was 22-23 but refused and my family tried pressing me into it but my father was not that forceful. So, right now am an educated, unemployed, civil service aspirant, watching comedians from America on you tube at 3 am in the morning while my parents are asking "when are you gonna get a job as even your younger brother got one"... And I'm single as f!uk while my younger cousins are getting married... 😭)
By the way love marriages are not that uncommon nowadays...
I want to say high five only except the fact.... I am 21 and its not 3 am but idk whyy i feel you...
Seems Like Her Father Was Graduate Form Amitabh Bachchan Gurukul
PARAMPARA, PRATISHTHA, ANUSHASHAN
This video should viral
That opening statement… 👌🏾
"Love" words were not used when I was growing up. "Love" was more your action... I love my mum so I'd clean the kitchen without being told etc...
Respectfully, I just strongly believe that her ideas about India are extremely outdated. Things are extremely different in India now. I’m a girl who belongs to middle class family and I don’t relate to her at all.
How old was she 15? Must have been about 30 years ago? How much of India had she seen even back then before she moved on to America? I think her perception of India is limited to whatever area she was living at the time. And her family's working can't be said to be how India worked even back then. She might have been more sheltered because her family was rich. And women in rich families were not known to be working women so what's left for them to do? Yes marry and raise children. That's why they were married so young. Rich families worked like that at that time. It was considered to be sign of high status at some areas for women in the family to stay at home not studying more than senior school or working but focusing on their families instead. But whole India was not so backward even back then. And yes people were aware of the legal age of marriage not everyone was married young like she said and it's 21 years now. My mother is her age, a well learned working women and she was raised in a village. She did not marry that young either.
My sister and I can't relate to the India she is talking about. I asked my parents if they had to face the same, but none had such strict parents the way she had. My mom is a PhD though.
Gianmarco saying “in kindergarten between math and gastroenterology class” was such a fucking funny joke
Okay hold up. This is an exaggeration. Reading?! My grandmother can read and write three languages, English included. And she lived through a very conservative and financially difficult time. I don't think if she was affluent as she claims to be, reading would ever be a problem. This doesn't add up.
Her knowledge of india is still in the 1970s. She does not know what she is talking about
Food is always a way to say love you in india...like "oh you having bad time ? Lets eat something good".. or "wow you got good rank in exams ..lets eat your fav meal"
Y'all coming here after watching Clip !!
I subcribed because of this Indian lady wisdom
It is changing. About marriage, parents do marry off their kids in arrange marriages , but they need to have permission from kids. They ask for kid's choices now. About saying "I love you" it depends on society to society. It's not generalized. She is talking about India 30-40 years ago.
hilarious 😂
I really like her but she has not been in India since I don't know how long...
So probably she has no idea how India has progressed
India is being represented wrong over here
Her story she could have said that..but it's being generalised by her...
Legal age in India is 18 yrs from 1978. And it's soon going to be 21 now
5:57 respect for this statement.
It's really hard to go against your family but hat's off to her courage 🙏
Wholeeeeee sarcasm I hope everyone understanding her
Here from the tiktok clip 💕
Our family could die for us, but we didn't even said 'i love you' once in our whole life.
"The brown collie"
SUCH a good point about how knowing about a subject makes articles about it intollerable for all of their factual errors. Same thing for those of us (more or less) in science. They're trotting that thing out again? We knew that 30 years ago. Now it's sliced bread? Come on! This is how old people get cranky, it's crank by crank and then suddenly, a years-long rant has to come out.
19:54
her face lol
She should put a disclaimer “Experiences are 30 years old”
here from reels✋🏼
Indian kids, Indian couples, Indian youth do say I love you to each other, and it means exactly what it means anywhere else in the English speaking world. It's just...culturally juvenile to say I love you.
U know she mentioned abt ppl being intolerant past few years but how come she didn't mention only one community was tolerant and other was more than intolerant......it's just ppl should not be in a misconception that only 1 community become radical....
Here's a small challenge for you - if I post the list of incidents happening in India today, will you let me do it? What you ppl are doing behind closed borders in the country is absolutely inhuman.
In the last few years there has been nothing but unimaginable inhumanity, babrbarism and apathy from only one side - the majority, which controls every single institution - police, media, law and order, judiciary, various agencies and even the power to spy.. Not to mention armed militias.
Nothing but poison & religious incitement spread on every single medium - from WhatsApp, FB, Twitter, RUclips, online portals, mainstream media, movies. No country which consumes this much poison can be normal.
@@mrgyani so u read this from a fb post or like what.....to call it babrbarism u don't know what happens here or the place where I come from....(I don't wanna pick the I have friends from other community) u don't get the news of a girl from our community is found in Syria and now she wants to come back n she is scared ...u don't watch these stuff in social media it's just one sided u watch....and when ppl here r converted to other religion based on providing money incase poverty they r partially converted they follow rules of one n identify as other.....inhuman we have seen these at ground level u can't, no u shouldn't just speak....
And abt stating the things happening in india I hope u know it's not always u who can speak facts I can do it too
@@mrgyani do you live in india ? Or you just reading the foreign media outlets feeding like Washington Post etc. You must cross check those author who are writing this articles. The have political leaning and they will post any amount of crap. I must come to India and see what's really happening . You think minorities are being oppressed by majority . Than you must see the recent cases where a hindu man got killed becoz he posted something on his WhatsApp status which a Muslim guy didn't like.
To every teenager dreaming about running away.. she ran to America and still regret it to some points. Don't make that mistake. 😂😂
Nothing is same now in india i live in up meerut and iam 22 and iam still single yeah but arrange marriage thing is same here I guess
I have never said i love you to my parents too 😅
When u r in the survival mode there is no time to be scare..... Wow 😲😲😲😲