the ups & downs of a 7 year relationship

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  • Опубликовано: 23 авг 2024

Комментарии • 64

  • @sojuwithsarah
    @sojuwithsarah  Месяц назад +41

    welcome back to another episode! & thank you everyone for continuing to engage and support the podcast 🥹 I haven't gotten a chance to reply to every comment yet since everything's been so hectic but we're getting the hang of things! today we have our first guest with us, James (also known as Jung to some), to have an open conversation about relationships, love & the origin story of sarah + james! ❤
    find him here! instagram.com/jung.garments

  • @xoxnataiie
    @xoxnataiie 21 день назад +64

    it makes me feel better knowing that not every anxious/avoidant attachment pairing ends in breakup.

  • @cooltrucly
    @cooltrucly Месяц назад +300

    i kid you not, this video came at the right time. you describing your young relationship, in particular the codependency and maintaining individuality bit… it feels like you’re describing my own relationship. my boyfriend and i are both 23 and have been living together for almost a year now. it became so easy to default to doing EVERYTHING with my boyfriend, to the point where it became the expectation. as a result i became distanced from my friends and almost socially anxious outside of my bf. i didn’t realize i was smothering my bf, and i interpreted him not wanting to do EVERYTHING with me all of the time as him not liking me as much. clearly a lot of this was rooted in insecurity. ironically i was a hyper-independent woman before i met him, and now here i was, depending on him for everything emotionally, physically, socially. i practically forgot how to be alone and maintain my inner world. i felt like i had to share everything. it was such a negative cycle i was stuck in but i’m glad to have emerged from it now.

    • @brielleblythe7504
      @brielleblythe7504 25 дней назад

      HI !! i kid you not i'm in the same eXACT to the teaaaaaaaa situtation. may i ask how you got out of that negative cycle?

    • @cooltrucly
      @cooltrucly 25 дней назад

      @@brielleblythe7504 most helpful thing was carving out time for my own hobbies and my own friends, separate from my boyfriend. next was having a conversation about it to enforce some boundaries for how much of our time should be dedicated to quality time together vs simply being in the same room together doing our own things. i had an important mindset shift of prioritizing my own individual life, so that when my boyfriend and i come together as individuals, we can form a stronger whole. :)

    • @loveforeva12
      @loveforeva12 24 дня назад +1

      Did you break up or figured out a resolution? I’m also 23, feel like I give into him wanting to hang out all the time because like you, he interprets it as me not liking him as much or me to willing to put in the work. I need time by myself! Lol

    • @kinsale186
      @kinsale186 24 дня назад +2

      @@loveforeva12just tell them exactly that, you might find yourself saying it multiple times because it’s something they will need to internalize

    • @loveforeva12
      @loveforeva12 24 дня назад +1

      @@kinsale186 you’re right… I have said it a couple times but it’s good to reinforce boundaries

  • @momoadazai939
    @momoadazai939 Месяц назад +78

    Honestly, this is one of the most heartwarming and down-to-earth honest podcast session I ever saw.

  • @saathviktummala9892
    @saathviktummala9892 Месяц назад +52

    I agree with James, a lot of guys cop-out talking to their girls and think they know what to do, but i think its also because we think we are the problem or that we have to solve whatever is wrong in the relationship by ourselves and that often means just breaking up which is really sad

  • @spicyhotpot_
    @spicyhotpot_ Месяц назад +62

    omg first off, i love the set up. the warm ambient lighting with the beautiful decor around is so nice to look at! i am new to your channel but the lighting caught my eye. shows so much personality with just that. second, you have sucha soothing voice! i loved listening to this while i crochet. and wow james speaks so differently than the boys i know irl... its like he actually has a fully formed brain. enjoyed this podcast!

  • @ophieho
    @ophieho Месяц назад +29

    I have been LOVING the pod Sarah!! I know how time consuming adding this to your repertoire of commitements has been, so I think I can speak for the majority of your audience who love and appreciate you for pumping out these comfy episodes alongside your other creative commitments (in the least parasocial way possible, thank you so much and I love you) 🩷
    Really enjoyed this episode particularly, it's REALLY hard to talk so openly about your relationship with your partner especially in the context of it being shared publicly online. Y'all have a great dynamic and have grown so much together, it well and truly shows when you reflect on your past and the challenges you've each faced.
    I have a question - how is James so eloquent with his words? Does he read a lot? Or does he consume less brain rot media or something? I feel like I read a lot and thought I had a decent vocabulary but the way he uses these big words in his sentences so casually just goes to show that he's in a whole different league LOL like I might try and use a big word because I saw it in the context of something, then someone asks me "what does that mean?" and then I'm like "i dunno it just sounded cool" HAHAHHA
    PS - team sarah, always (sorry james)

  • @jocemotley
    @jocemotley Месяц назад +12

    20 seconds in the video, 8 months in my relationship I literally want to marry him but we are 19/20 and in college so there is some time until then. Things have been almost all smooth but we are just learning the ends and out of each other right now. I know it’s gonna be a journey and I love seeing other couples that got together around the same time talk about navigating young adulthood and the experience of becoming oneself while also in a relationship

  • @musicmoviestrailers1
    @musicmoviestrailers1 Месяц назад +17

    Love this! Transparency about your ups and downs and making it to a solid healthy place is so important wish there was more content like this!

  • @yorkinkhidirov1999
    @yorkinkhidirov1999 Месяц назад +10

    team Sames (sarah + james)! You guys are so down to earth, calm collected. You are giving me a hope on having a long lasting healthy relationship. Glad to be a part of your journey...

  • @edgykatrina
    @edgykatrina Месяц назад +31

    I have been loving this pod!!!! also James is such an emotionally intelligent self aware king...

  • @Yooue
    @Yooue Месяц назад +16

    I love how down to earth, chill, and mature you guys are! I’m so happy you decided to do podcasts bc you’ve accomplished so much which inspires me to do so as well. Thank you so much for sharing your stories!

  • @aprylchiem
    @aprylchiem Месяц назад +10

    I really liked listening to you guys talk about your relationship and being really open and vulnerable. It's nice seeing both of you together in the vlogs and in these podcasts.

  • @kaitlynchua8788
    @kaitlynchua8788 28 дней назад +5

    This video literally sums up my current situation so I can't thank you enough for sharing your experience esp the LDR component because I just graduated from uni and also going through long distance and had troubles at the 2 year mark too! Absolutely love the video! Keep up the good work!

  • @whachuupto
    @whachuupto Месяц назад +21

    Timing couldn't be more perfect for this episode to come out. You guys have been the soundtrack to my hours of packing myself out of my Vancouver apartment. I think I would have lost my mind if I didn't have your dulcet voices keeping me company

    • @loup5533
      @loup5533 22 дня назад +1

      Haha I'm doing the same but packing in ! Taking upstairs all these boxes and wondering what I'm going to keep when moving in with a roomate who already lives in the appart is easier listening to them calmy go back on the history of their relationship !

  • @itssharonma
    @itssharonma Месяц назад +15

    not me tearing up watching this; this is so cute 🥹

  • @LovelyBeauty21
    @LovelyBeauty21 Месяц назад +8

    I love this episode so much and the mature insight you both have reflecting on your relationships. I usually don’t like podcasts but I’ve been really enjoying this one and the topics have been so great and relatable so far ☺️

  • @sublimebutterfly55
    @sublimebutterfly55 15 дней назад +1

    I love how you guys slowly get closer and closer throughout the conversation lol

  • @erinrobles5704
    @erinrobles5704 25 дней назад +2

    so lovely!! this is my new comfort podcast🥹🥹

  • @bitterang4661
    @bitterang4661 Месяц назад +6

    james is so messy for that ending haha #teamsames
    i love how you guys articulated your emotions so well... i hope i'm this emotionally mature + secure when im 27

  • @shevanisegivans8773
    @shevanisegivans8773 Месяц назад +7

    I’m so thankful for this podcast ❤ This episode made my day.

  • @avrikion
    @avrikion Месяц назад +7

    Ya'll are so genuinely cute together!

  • @ellemccray6171
    @ellemccray6171 Месяц назад +5

    Newest fav pod in my weekly rotation!

  • @fireystella
    @fireystella Месяц назад +6

    your talks are very insightful~~ thank you for sharing! i feel like your pod makes me think :p

  • @dominique5802
    @dominique5802 Месяц назад +4

    I watched an episode of yours about aging and there’s some so healing about watching these 💗 thank you for making these. just subscribed :)

  • @nguy3namy
    @nguy3namy Месяц назад +12

    team sarah, but still love u king

  • @happymallows7232
    @happymallows7232 Месяц назад

    can i just say moose is sooo cute and it's so nice of u to just let him roam around freely

  • @hchung155
    @hchung155 Месяц назад

    Love your podcast so far! Thank you as well for having it available on apple podcast :-) I like to listen on the go!

  • @ItsStyleTheory
    @ItsStyleTheory 29 дней назад

    Aww I loved this ☺️ and both of your voices are so calming!

  • @happymallows7232
    @happymallows7232 Месяц назад +2

    i loveee this episode. but i think it would be extra nice if you would put a subtitle/caption in your podcast :)

  • @steven-cs8rr
    @steven-cs8rr Месяц назад +3

    Team Sarah all the way haha
    Loved the podcast!

  • @lily_007
    @lily_007 Месяц назад +3

    Great episode!

  • @laurendelgado3249
    @laurendelgado3249 Месяц назад +8

    Team James 🤭 HEHE, nah jkjk. Thank you guys for making this video! As someone in a 4 year LDR who's about to move in with their partner, this was really important for me to watch. It definitely gave me some ideas for conversations we should have. I wish you guys so much love and happiness with your next milestones! 💘💖💝

    • @loup5533
      @loup5533 22 дня назад

      Yeees completely ! Sometimes I feel like I should not be watching other people talk about their relationship on youtube because it would be like "spoiling" me of what may happen in my relationship and maybe make me too cerebral or less genuine you know ? But it's so reassuring to listen to them talk about what they struggled and they still went through it. We know very well how to deal with conflict with my girlfriend and the fact we have great communication makes me very sure of us lasting and wanting to last but I know that going through adulthood, finding new jobs, purposes, wondering where to live will be a lot ! Their video really helps anticipating these talks we'll need to have !

  • @ac6852
    @ac6852 Месяц назад +3

    love you guys so much

  • @happymallows7232
    @happymallows7232 Месяц назад

    special request to make bloopers section a portion for moose coz he's soooo cutee

  • @TheTk85
    @TheTk85 Месяц назад +2

    TEAM SARAH!!

  • @jekinha112530
    @jekinha112530 Месяц назад

    This was so wholesome

  • @cathlapugot
    @cathlapugot Месяц назад +1

    Love halo-halo!!!

  • @geralddd.g
    @geralddd.g Месяц назад +4

    😂W bloopers

  • @jxxxvii
    @jxxxvii Месяц назад +1

    Yayyy thanks for getting halohalo from ur Filipino viewer

  • @dinannananna
    @dinannananna Месяц назад +1

    Team Moose obviously.

  • @frogiwthoutahat
    @frogiwthoutahat Месяц назад +10

    I am not going to tell you what to do. but you need to give this guy an ultimatum. Because if he's not overjoyed to marry you at any time, you could easily find someone in new york who would. and I'm not even talking about appearance wise, but just there's so many other fish in the sea. I'm sure there's a lot of love there and all, but you deserve someone who will give you the marriage and kids on a decent timeline and not feel scared about that idea. there are so many good guys looking for that. I'm dating as a woman who doesn't really want kids and trust me every single guy wants kids

    • @lucyl4603
      @lucyl4603 28 дней назад +9

      If you need to give someone an ultimatum, the marriage is doooooomed. Just find someone who matches your needs / pace

    • @idab6864
      @idab6864 23 дня назад

      Anytime I see someone wait 7+ years to get married it's hard not to view it as a "shut up" ring

    • @marcelal.8688
      @marcelal.8688 5 дней назад

      I don't agree on the ultimatum, but I really see what you mean. She does deserve better and I'm almost 100% sure she would find a better match for herself, a person that would just click almost instantly, and build a strong and sure relationship from there. I'm kind of sad after hearing this story, and I'm a person who is with her first partner still, after 12 years.

  • @Angela-vu7vo
    @Angela-vu7vo 3 дня назад

    you should have manifestelle on your podcast

  • @therenatagomes
    @therenatagomes Месяц назад +2

    I'm team MOOSE 💅🏻hahahaha

  • @_mishal.a
    @_mishal.a 29 дней назад

    team james.

  • @ninatomas
    @ninatomas 23 дня назад

    Please keep sprinkling big words we love to see it hahha

  • @devianandirene
    @devianandirene Месяц назад

    If you both break up, I'll take Moose's side 😆👅

  • @shouqblue
    @shouqblue 16 дней назад

    team Sames hehehe

  • @alexasoto8653
    @alexasoto8653 Месяц назад

    Team Sarah

  • @katherinetran812
    @katherinetran812 Месяц назад +4

    We can barely see your faces.

  • @CarbonatedGrape
    @CarbonatedGrape Месяц назад +11

    Team James, let's be honest here, he has a higher chance with Michael B. Jordan and I too would like to hop on that train. 🚆