Struggling With Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria and ADHD? (YOU'RE NOT ALONE!) | HIDDEN ADHD
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- Опубликовано: 24 авг 2024
- Rejection sensitive dysphoria (or RSD) is one of the most disruptive symptoms of ADHD. It's possible you've experienced it and didn't even know where those extreme emotions had originated... in fact, up to 99% of teens and adults with ADHD are more sensitive than usual to rejections. Let's talk through the signs, symptoms and some ways this has shown up in my life and how I've managed it.
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Aron Croft, Aaron Croft, Hidden ADD, Hidden ADHD, Atypical Coach, neurodivergent, neurodiversity
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Bro you look stoned in this video🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Pee pee poo poo🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
One of the hardest hardest things about rejection sensitivity is an acute awareness that it is an overreaction. Sort of a slow train wreck where your thoughts betray your feelings
Not always.
Sometimes people are toxic, unfair and exploitative and have hidden agenda.
Sometimes we are not over-reacting at all - we react just right to abnormal people around us.
Idea that we self blame and self pathologize ourselves is product of CBT which is making money on our neurosis and exposure to mobbing, abuse and bullying - where our reactions are somehow problem, but Cluster B monsters are not in the focus at all.
Well put.
Today something happened where I couldn’t stop my reaction and I just felt so stupid because I knew my reaction wasn’t appropriate to the stimulus but I couldn’t cope. I just wish I could get it under control it is so stressful and now I have been disregulated all day
@@musicmad4415 yeah…..sometimes I shut down and totally under-react because I think I’m about to over-react. Hard to do it perfectly for me.
It's horrible. Stops me from doing things that everyone says I'm good at just incase I find our someone thinks I'm bad at it. Smh
Ugh, story if my life. I've spent years unraveling my "people pleaser" personality. I used to blow up when friends would change or cancel plans because it felt like rejection. SO DRAMATIC. It's soooo worth it to put in the work to cope with RSD... thanks for talking about this!
People pleasing is connected to our Agreeableness and Openness - which are both personality traits (Big 5).
If we decide to destroy our basic self persona - we will develop personality disorder and deep seated toxic shame (self hatred and rancour). That is why CBT must be banned - since it creates mental illness because it equates our reactions to abuse to our character trait.
Problem with people pleasing are toxic people who use our ability to connect with other people by fawning to them.
We can never make friends if we are not agreeable at some point, of form any meaningful abuse-free romantic contact with someone.
Pathology is when we are serial killers and without empathy - that is sickness and only abnormality. Fawning is trauma response, it is not sickness.
I was diagnosed as kid. Never really enjoyed. Was always separated from other kids. Put into different classes. Given exams with marks that would make it easier. I thought my escape from all that would be Basketball. I was wrong, one day in practice I guess a couple of guys weren’t running the drill right. I got caught doing it. Was told to go run. While running my coach makes the joke “KIDS WITH ADD SHOULDNT DRIVE CARS. WHATS IT LIKE FOR THEM. GREEN MEANS STOP. RED MEANS GO”. I did end up quitting the team but was treated with discuss. Reported the Coach and all I got from Athletic Director was “What do you want me to do about?” And yes the drama continued with something in college. Thank you all for time in reading this, thank you for introducing me to RSD. This something I’m gonna look into and try help others with.
Your coach had no business working with young people. These kind of stories anger me so much. As if EVERYONE doesn't have issues to work through. I hope your are feeling better
same, my mom took me to all sorts of different sport practices for young kids when i was little. almost every single time I got picked up early because i cried and begged to go home.
My clinical years were H.E.L.L. When I got the smallest to the most humiliating rejection from doctors, I cried like there was no tomorrow, always felt inferior when I see my peers handle it emotionally better than I do. I tend to zone out when I am in clinics and I forgot everything that happened inside there for some reason. Because of RSD, I missed a lot of opportunities where I could have volunteered or help to do procedures. Now I am in 4th Year of Medicine and hoping that I can beat this RSD and redeem myself to get enough experience to be a safe Dr 😢
I'd say one of the difficult parts is dealing with the deep anger/sadness of rejection whether perceived or real. This is especially bad during COVID when Im isolated and it seems hopeless because your rejected by the people in your life you thought were your friends.
I think thats why "sometimes think about hurting themselves" is on that list of signs because you feel hopeless in changing your situation because you obviously can't make people like you.
Thats just been my experience though. This past week is the first time I've been able to put the name RSD to what I've been experiencing.
Yeah ya right, like I dont wanna be an a$$hole but everyone and everything makes me feel like an a$$hole even this RSD thing makes me feel like im an a$$hole. I dont mean ta cuss. this is reality for me til I can get propper help.
So relatable! I was an extreme people pleaser with high social anxiety until I was in my 30s, but I have also gone through long periods of time where I tried to shut down my emotions, numb out, and tell myself that I didn't care what people thought. I avoided social situations because of fear of making a mistake and of being an embarrassment to my family so much that I thought I might have avoidant personality disorder..
I was diagnosed with inattentive ADHD and started on Adderall in my mid 30s, and, it gave my career a tremendous boost, which also strengthened my self esteem in some situations, but it didn't help much with my sensitivity to rejection in personal relationships, emotionally charged situations, or social settings where I felt scrutinized by people that mattered to me on a personal level..
I was ashamed to even tell anyone about my diagnosis because of the stigma I felt around having a disorder that many people that I know believe is just a made up excuse for poor character and lack of willpower.
OMG I totally relate to everything you said in your post. Especially the part about trying to numb out my feelings, avoid thinking about upsetting social situations, trying to convince myself I don’t care what people think of me, even coming up with unfair critiques about friends to make them less appealing to me so that it wouldn’t matter as much to me if they rejected me. Ugh. I am struggling with the many different ways in which adhd and rsd affect me at work, and I also am very ashamed to admit to any coworkers that I have this disorder. And i work in a mental health setting. In some ways you would think that would make it easier to admit that, but in some ways it makes it harder. Either way, it’s such a source of deep shame that I can’t do my job better.
It's important to remember that having a disorder does not define who you are or your abilities. It takes a lot of courage and strength to work through these challenges, and seeking support from trusted individuals can make a big difference. Remember to be kind to yourself and focus on your strengths rather than your shortcomings. You are not alone in this struggle.
This is spot on. Thank you. I was diagnosed with ADHD at age 60. When I learned about RSD, it explained SO many aspects (the hardest ones) of my life and how Ive blown up so many relationships in the process, and how excruciatingly painful it all is. Now that I’m aware of it, it helps a little. I can see when it’s happening, and if I catch it early I can stop it from escalating, but once the ruminating about whatever the “thing” is has taken over my thoughts, it’s a runaway train. And the shame and guilt I feel afterward is horrifying. I’m hoping that becoming more aware and learning what my triggers and warning signs are over time, I can continually shorten and lessen the cycle and my outbursts so they don’t hurt me and the people I care about.
We must simply stop and realize that we live in toxic world where Trumps are presidents and where toxic corrupt medical community is hiding concepts from us - such as Complex Trauma and present exposure to abuse as hallucination.
I was just diagnosed with ADHD and I found your video doing research. RSD has definitely been a huge part of my life and has shown up in very destructive ways usually with me being excessively violent or angry with people who reject me or who I think have rejected me. I have also burned a ton of bridges relationship wise and just overall struggled maintaining relationships because any perceives slight would set me off. Even 7 years of anger management therapy hasn't completely fixed the rage I can summon if my feelings get hurt. It sucks!
"excessively violent or angry with people who reject me or who I think have rejected me"
This is psychopathy.
@@ranc1977 you could be right. But I have never been diagnosed as a psychopath and I have extreme empathy something I think psychopaths lack. I work with a therapist for anger management and other traumas, but I'll let her know your suggestion.
@@amourcasse Psychopaths can mimic empathy. Borderliners use empathy as a tool to attract new victims.
We all see Weinstein appearing with crutches in court - to elicit empathy in others by pretending to be a victim - exploiting empathy to get free for his crimes against humanity.
I stumbled on to RSD references and it was like a gift to understanding my over the top reaction to criticism and perceived rejection ( diagnosed with PTSD).My anger in response to the slightest questioning of me has cost me friends, my confidence, my ability to participate in activities. Thank you
Opening my emails and messages feels like torture!
I've spent 2 days avoiding opening an email because I fear the answer within it, and I don't know what to do if it contains rejection.
The email contains the the answer to whether or not a situation that my RSD got me into in the first place, will be resolved.
Omg I Never thought about that. I am shocked.
Hi, I know your post was 9 mos ago. I wonder what was the outcome. I have similar avoidant patterns. If I’m not sure what someone is going to be relaying, sometimes I will just avoid, avoid, avoid just because I’m afraid I won’t be able to handle how I feel afterward. Ugh. It has led me to losing friends and alienating myself, so I totally relate.
For me, sitting through department meetings at work is torture. I’m always anticipating the great admiration that others will receive when they talk about their work, whereas I never feel like what I am doing is good enough to receive such a response. It makes me so uncomfortable and anxious. I feel inadequate no matter what. I try my hardest to mask this, but I have no idea if I succeed or not.
It's completely understandable to feel that way in meetings, especially with the pressure to perform and impress others. It's important to remember that everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, and it's okay to not feel confident in certain areas. One thing that might help is to try and focus on the value that you bring to the team, even if it's not in the same way as others. And don't be too hard on yourself, it's okay to make mistakes and have room to grow.
It's common for individuals with ADHD to have difficulty with emotional regulation and to struggle with avoidance behaviors. It's important to recognize these patterns and work on developing strategies to manage them. Therapy and medication can be helpful for individuals with ADHD, and it may be helpful to talk to a healthcare professional about your concerns. Additionally, practicing mindfulness and self-compassion can help you better understand and manage your emotions. It's also important to remember that it's okay to make mistakes and that we all have flaws.
Yo this guy is my spirit animal. Im constantly paranoid people will misunderstand my intentions or presentation of myself and fear i will die alone because woman screwing me over has made my self esteem and fear of rejection or being hurt unbearable 💔
I have same feelings been misunderstood rejected and bullied because of differences in seeing life. It hurts my feelings when people put blame on you.
This is me & these coping skills are ON POINT! I wouldnt necessarily say we are "people pleasers" tho....just an idea, but what if we learn to please people not because we care about being liked or accepted, but as a way to protect ourselves. I know I have RSD and I feel like ive learned all these coping skills to prevent situstions that trigger my rsd and leave me feeling down. I dont even like most NT people, I dont want to be in their group or hang out too long, but being rejected by NT people in general makes me question myself....so i use these coping skills in order to avoid my emotional response to their rejection bc I know I am unable to process these feelings of rejection. Maybe this is my adhd brain thinking too much into it.
RSD has to be there most devastating side of adhd that I’m just now tackling & taking serious. It might just be more problematic than any of the other symptoms especially since it’s almost never talked about. This was pretty darn spot on, especially the analytical part getting in the way
I was diagnosed with ADD early in life, but despite all of my history with therapy and other mental health-related treatments, I never heard a thing about RSD. After some research I realize it's just starting to take hold as a legitimate condition although it isn't recognized in the DSM.
I am in no way overstating when I say if I learned about RSD early on, it would have drastically improved my overall quality of life. At this point I feel I've destroyed too much of it, and lost people and things I cared deeply for without ever knowing it wasn't just me, or my anxiety or depression, but was instead RSD. I feel so broken because I feel I may have found out the truth too late to salvage what's left of my life. After reading up on the literature behind this, I've been bingeing videos on the topic and reading comments from others who are experiencing RSD, which led me to this video. Living with this is such a painful existence. Even those who love and want to understand me can't, and I have no idea how to change that.
I believe it is never too late to salvage what you can even in the latter years of your life. It is definitely hard for neurotypicals to understand us but maybe surrounding yourself with people who are experiencing the same thing can help you.
CBT is horrible therapy of ablelism and self pathology. It is Ludovico Technique from Clockwork orange.
As a person with ADHD and a parent of a child with ADD a huge THANK YOU!
I immediately liked and subscribed!
I just nuked a priceless friendship with my best friend! She’s an amazing, warm, kind and sensitive woman. We’ve been friends for 40 years and always had an underlying connection. Dated for a little over a year and went through a very understandable break for health reasons. We were slowly becoming closer and more relaxed and were to go out together for the first time in a few months. My RSD coupled with the ugly side effects of the bupropion I was on combined and I had the most embarrassingly off base, out of line and impulsive reaction to something that didn’t even warrant a comment, not to mention being wildly inaccurate! I hurt her deeply and broke her heart! I couldn’t understand what happened with me, where it came from or how it spiraled so instantly!
It wasn’t until after the damage was done that I learned about the RSD as well as the side effects, not to mention how they could combine and become so irrational and impulsive!
I so wish that I had known about all of this sooner in life! But at least I’m discovering what’s behind the emotions now and how to regulate. I have forever thought that I was just some emotional freak.
OMG you amazing! I just got diagnosed with RSD and it’s overwhelming with the ADHD but I realize now it’s the core of my self sabotaging and reclusive tendencies. Thank you SO much for sharing your story as I’ve been trying to release my own video series for like a decade but makes sense that RSD is making me question everything social, including this post and all of social media.
I think social media is RSD kryptonite so you should feel even more proud!❤
(and anyone else with RSD commenting! 😅)
Thanks Andrea. And points for commenting! Given your comment, you would love our 5 day challenge process. Have you joined us for one yet? Its free. (FreeADHDchallenge.com)
Any of my people that got adhd that only found out in your 40s? Didn't get made fun of because i had no problem sitting still so never knew till years later when i found out more characteristic traits.
I cant stop being a people pleaser
There are so many things that have triggered me and trigger me today that I couldn't even begin to list them. For me I fear having no one to talk to or relate to. A fear of being lonely, having no friends to be there for me when I need it, because I can't handle the idea of being criticized or perceiving something as criticism and running away/avoiding people because of it. I was quiet as well throughout my teen years into early adulthood. I am getting the help I need, though, now, and I am so excited to learn how my brain works and how to take control of my life.
It takes a lot of courage to seek help and to work on yourself, and I applaud you for taking those steps. Remember that everyone has their own journey and struggles, and it's okay to take things at your own pace. Don't be too hard on yourself, and keep pushing forward. You are not alone, and there are people out there who will support you through your journey.
It's like you are able to put into words exactly how I have felt all of my life. It explains so much. Thank you.
First time I remember having an RSD episode I was five. I was trying to learn a skill that they would test me on to let me into kindergarten. I struggled with it. I already hated that I couldn't get it the first time I tried. Then I reached a point where I gave up, thought that it was evidence that I was stupid and unlovable, and started crying. I was down for the count for at least an hour. I think it was the next day when I was feeling calmer that I tried again, and I got the skill right. This pattern has continued my whole life. Once I started puberty, the episodes came with suicidal ideations. I'm 43 now, still not diagnosed, still don't know how to deal with it, and still feeling like a failure.
THANK YOU! This video is great! Short enough that I don't lose focus and sooooo on point, it really ressonates with me! I was diagnosed only 3 months ago, and RSD explains so much about my life that I'm in shock to find out how deeeeply it has impacted me my whole life...Been looking for a video that easily explains my very real struggles and how I've felt all my life, so that I can show it to someone who's very important to me. Hopefully they will understand me better after this video :) THANK YOU again and CONGRATS on the amazing work your doing on your own development!
You're very welcome! I'm glad to hear that the video resonated with you and provided valuable insights into your own experiences with RSD. It can be a powerful tool to help others understand your struggles and the impact ADHD has had on your life. I hope that sharing the video with someone important to you helps foster better understanding and support. Thank you for your kind words and I wish you all the best on your journey of self-development and navigating ADHD.
Thank you for sharing! I’ve learned more and more about the blessings and downfalls of ADHD these past few months. This is the hardest part to address I feel. I can set timers, alarms, and calendar reminders until the cows come home but this is tricky
Yeah, just figured out rsd had sabotaged every part of my life. Even though I can go to college and get honors the rsd has ruined my reputation with many people and also robbed me of my confidence. Now I’m trying to recover from homelessness and maybe get a job if that’s ever possible again.
🤗
I can highly recommend hypnoanalysis. I had it as part of therapy before I knew I had ADHD and it was life changing. When I discovered ADHD and started reading about RSD I was unsure if it was something I experienced, then I realised it was something that used to struggle with a lot before therapy. I still get it, but nowhere near the frequency or intensity as before the hypnoanalysis.
Yesss!
I remember one time it was my first day of college and i got rejected by a guy that i was talking to, later i met up with him and some friends and lunch and i totally shut down. Like i couldn't look him in the eye and was really moody. I remember in the moment wondering why I was reacting that way but in hindsight it makes sense that it was my rejection sensitivity kicking in.
Woah! I really related to your experiences! I am truly grateful that you are doing a ADHD inattentive channel. We don’t get a lot of attention and the way our ADHD presents is not talked about making us question our ADHD.
My RSD has caused me for most of my life have a small life, try to be under the radar and mask. I hardly ever share how I’m feeling because it has happened where a family member or friend didn’t understand which made me feel like I am weird, feel misunderstood and made me so hurt. I say to myself Why do I try and open up- such a waste of my time!!
My life is half as good as it would have been if I was diagnosed and got psychological treatment much earlier! I figured it out just 1 1/2 years ago in my late 40s!
Need to start counseling! I did in the past but I was diagnosed with situational depression as a 19 yo and social anxiety at 39 years old. Need to go knowing that I have inattentive ADHD.
I'm glad you found my content relatable and valuable! It's unfortunate that ADHD inattentive type often goes unrecognized or misunderstood, leading to feelings of isolation and questioning one's own experiences. It's never too late to seek support and counseling to better understand and manage your ADHD. Counseling can provide you with strategies, coping mechanisms, and a safe space to explore your thoughts and emotions. Remember, getting a diagnosis and seeking treatment is a positive step towards improving your well-being and quality of life.
Reading the symptoms off that list almost made me cry. Literally all the things :(
I had severe months long panic attacks and 10+ years of intensely sad dreams following my husband telling me I was a good woman, he just didn't love me anymore before he left us. I didn't have bouts of anger, just severe people pleasing to avoid being left. For last 20+ years haven't I've chosen to avoid feeling this way again by avoid relationships.
Hypnoanalysis sounds interesting, I am myself very analytical person. I can definitely relate to self sabotage, the amount of times I shot myself in the foot on purpose, lol
Truth
I really went the different route. Instead of trying to fit in, I kinda went extreme in a lot of ways. It didn't go to well for me in school to say the least. I had no idea I had ADHD and probably could have avoided a lot of this by being diagnosed. It also effects my relationships both in my marriage and work. Luckily, I am married to a wonderful women who helps me back when I do fall into those damn traps.
Good for you! When did you get diagnosed?
@@HIDDENADHD Thanks for the reply! I got diagnosed on Monday. I just want to let you know that it was your content and a couple others on tic tok that really made me realize the truth about who I am. If it wasn't for your content specifically, I would still be in the dark about it.
Seriously, from the bottom of my heart, thank you my friend! Knowing literally has changed everything for me. And i owe you big!
This is so painfully relatable. Thank you for sharing and your suggestions 😊
I have a partner who grew up in a more blunt/critical household, and the way he talks to me sets off my RSD all the time, leading to big dramatic fights. It’s awful
Found out about RSD by accident because one of my break ups from years ago bothered me n still to this day because when he got mad he'd walk out. He didn't take a walk n come back. He'd go home.(He lived an hour away) One day i told him if he walked out this time thats it n i stuck to my guns. It hurt like hell n even 8 years later i wondered should i have done things better? But i poured my heart n soul into it n even begged him to come back a few times n he did but eventually i got tired of being the only to try make everything right again. So for years i tried find out why does it bother me why do i ruminate over a narcissist? N i realized i can't handle being rejected by someone i thought loved me. N a rsd vid popped up n i learned more about it n how it stems from your childhood n everything. I realized omg that explains everything because all of it is completely me. It wasn't about him. it was every time he walked out over lil things it kept triggering me n i never realized it. I feel so much better knowing why n how it effected me.
I stopped trying to date because I've been rejected so many times and it hurts way too much to even think about trying again. I invest so much emotionally but when they just want to be friends I'm absolutely crushed. I think I might have initentive ADHD as well. I've only had 2 girlfriends my whole life and they were short lived. I'm 38 now and I wonder if I'm always going to be alone.
Sorry to hear man. Maybe through a high self-awareness and you can try to mitigate the pain. Try to think of the best
Overly sensitive. Getting me in all kinds of trouble with bullying boss. 😢 I hide away from social interaction.
Must be a nightmare trying to meditate when you have ADHD. I'm pretty sure I don't have ADHD and I find it really difficult to stick to meditation despite it being shown to be good for people with social anxiety type problems.
I am not sure if I have this because I am actually rejected a lot.
I have been rejected since the 2nd grade. All because I played with another child because no one else would play with her. That made the other kids reject me too.
I am shy... mind-blowing to hear it can be caused by a fear of rejection.
I don't do the things mentioned in the video to get people to like me. For example, I don't stay neutral on topics just to fit in. I think people should be able to be friends with people they don't agree with on everything.
I wished that too. Unfortunately the world doesn’t roll that way and if you suffer from this dissonance, have your opinion but get more sensitive for if it is worth expressing it in every given situation. Be ok to disagree internally. As you might have found out: people’s egos often stand in the way of such a mutual ,,agree to disagree‘‘ and still be able to like each other. At least this tactic has worked for me. ❤
@@damionmortenson84 I wouldn't really want to be friends with people that I have to agree with everything they say or they won't be my friend.
Of course, I don't always say something if I don't agree.
The man that created this video kicked me out of his coaching program. He wouldn't tell me why. He said over and over again to everyone that he was open to feedback. I would even stand up for him when someone disagreed with him. That would have been my one chance to find out from a coach what I needed to do to improve relationships. But he wouldn't tell me what I did wrong. I can't improve if no one will tell me.
@@damionmortenson84I responded but it was deleted.
I don't think expressing feelings is why I don't have friends. I usually can't even talk because others do the talking
worst part is people are scared ta be around me and I dont know why and Im scared ta be around people and they dont know why,as if it were that simple. I know its cause im crazy and i wont stop talkin ta them and as it gets awkward and hardder I try ta focus and it gets worse. Then they leave and now(knowing full dam well its ME),"Well, THEY must be havin a bad day or THEY must be a jerk, ad nausium." People think im a JERK and I cant stop no matter how hard I try. Only Practical solution I come up with is acceptance which mean I must BE a JERK and not care when I talk and shut myself in so theres no conflict.
Damn, I've never been diagnosed with adhd, but lately watching content like Yours I'm more and more convinced that I have it... not sure what to do now, probably should go to therapy...
You are describing me PERFECTLY!
I've tried option 2&3, I NEED hypnoanalysis...
OMG we are so similar, I am so analytical, and I am sure that hypnosis will work for me too.
If I perceive rejection I will reject that person back with full effect.
We all need to remember the truth. Not only do most people not care, but they are usually too busy worrying about themselves to think twice about you. Just think about how much you think about yourselves. It's the same with others.
People just want you because they needypu you
This perspective can help to alleviate some of the anxieties related to RSD. However, it's essential to address the underlying emotional concerns with a therapist or counselor, who can help develop coping strategies and work on building self-esteem. Recognizing that others are often preoccupied with their own lives can be a helpful starting point for managing RSD, but professional guidance is crucial to ensure long-term improvement.
It's important to recognize that people form relationships for various reasons, and sometimes those reasons may be based on personal needs or desires. It's true that some individuals might seek relationships for self-serving purposes, but it's also essential to remember that many others form genuine connections based on love, care, and mutual understanding.
It's crucial to cultivate healthy relationships and surround yourself with people who genuinely appreciate you for who you are, rather than what you can do for them. Developing strong communication skills, setting boundaries, and learning to recognize the signs of a healthy relationship can help ensure you're surrounded by supportive and caring individuals. Remember, not everyone will have selfish intentions, and it's important to give yourself the opportunity to connect with those who truly value you.
the upbeat elevator jazz in the background is killing me bro
This kicks my furry butt all of the time. The trick I've learned is to wait these feelings out. I go for a walk and give it some time. It's wild how RSD leaves after a relatively short amount of time.
Have never gotten a job or a date unless it was handed to me! I hate being this way!
For me, it was the fear of anticipating rejection. I always feared it so I kept to myself and have almost no friends till I decided to mask it to get friends. Then I stopped masking bc it was exhausting and I have made some pretty cool friends, but the fear of anticipating rejection and then the emotional pain when I do encounter rejection is still a lot and still is a big problem in my life. It causes me to miss out on relationships, and other things. I have this intense pain or tenseness whenever I’m around people. Now that I know it’s rsd, whenever I try to not feel that way and ignore it I become insensitive
Guanfacine is helping my son greatly. All the time we thought he was painfully shy but really he was hiding
Story of my life. I think the hardest part is how its affected when theres a girl I like. Because of past instances of terrible rejection, it creeps up and I end up holding back my feelings.
I can understand how past experiences of rejection can make it challenging to navigate relationships, especially when there's someone you're interested in. The fear of being hurt or rejected again can cause us to hold back our feelings as a way to protect ourselves. It's important to remember that everyone's journey is unique, and it's okay to take things at your own pace. It might be helpful to work on building self-confidence and self-esteem, as well as exploring strategies to manage fear and anxiety around relationships. Consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor who can provide guidance and help you navigate these emotions. Remember, you deserve happiness and fulfilling connections, and taking steps towards healing and growth can lead to positive experiences in the future.
Very informative! Thanks
great advice, keep it coming
This was so helpful could you make more rsd videos please?
I'm glad you find my content helpful. And yes, I'll keep on making more helpful content.
Oh my god 😢 I have all those symptoms. I’ve had them for 33 years 😔. My 18 month old nephew is also behaving like me 😔.
Quality my guy 👏👏
This was so helpful.
Omgssh, I tried to join a MLM because I really loved the products and I love making videos and being creative but the constant rejection was terrrriiibbbllle for me, I tried so bad to uplift myself but I ended up quitting and then trying again only to forget it all because of the constant high rejection in that industry. And yes to the self-sabotage 😣😣
Oh no. Are you doing better now?
Just diagnosed with ADHD inattentive type and the other day had a meltdown about being so sensitive to rejection or perceived offense. It's overwhelming sometimes because I'm aware but in the moment when im upset , I cant really see it any other way. Ita hard...and it's emotionally draining. Worst part is sometimes I can't drop it like...I have to say what I want to say because I feel i am defending myself. Also worst part is I'm my own critic.
It's tough dealing with the emotional impact of ADHD and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD). Try to remind yourself that your perceptions may be distorted and focus on developing self-awareness and emotional resilience. Seek professional help and build a support network to better manage your emotions and improve relationships. Remember, you're not alone in this journey.
Thanks you for sharing. My daughter who is 55 this year. Suffered years. Now I can put pieces together. It is her 100%. She appears to be alone adhd . She need to be aware because she is fearful will not watch any videos cannot get her to be assessed. What can you advised? I am at breaking point as 80 yrs. Please don't ignore my request.
I never really thought of it as fear or sensitivity. It was just logical to me. Rejection was something to be avoided. Just like you don’t touch a hot oven, don’t put yourself in a situation where you would be rejected. 🤷🏼♂️
Perfect description
Wow! Just made me aware of my another defense mechanism.
You're welcome? 😜 Thanks for being a regular viewer on the channel
Yes! You cut to the point without beating around the bush, for which my ADD brain is very grateful! :)
I HATE ZONING OUT
I think-that my partner has ADHD and RSD. He lacks time management, loses things, procrastinates, over thinks, over talks and is an obsessive perfectionist. But he is not hyperactive. Doesn’t fidget. Can blurt out things & interrupt -at times - but CAN often be a good listener. He CAN focus and he isn’t
distracted -once on task-maybe even hyper-focused at times. Yes he is sometimes hyper-focused and sometimes spacy.
Zoned out. He is very overly sensitive-gets his feelings hurt so easily. For this reason I think he probably also has RSD. He is easily embarrassed. Gets angry or has an emotional outburst when he
feels like someone has ‘disrespected’ him. He sets high standards for himself and when he can’t meet them he gets very discouraged with himself. Shuts down. Sulks. Tells himself he is a victim. He can make an issue out of the slightest thing and I keep telling him that every single little thing can’t be "a thing" ! I say let this thing GO it’s not worth obsessing about. You are just upsetting yourself. He admits he is a people pleaser! I Thrives on recognition. Needs a lot of praise & validation. I get stressed wondering what will upset or disappoint him each day? Exhausting because he gets his feelings hurt so easily-over nothing!! Embarrasses me with his outbursts at times and inappropriate anger. Overwhelmed by things..starts things-piano lessons, building a greenhouse and doesn’t finish. Things pile up in a cluttered disorganized mess all around him.
Hyper focused at times. Working outside. Inconsistent at times.
It sounds like your partner is experiencing some challenges that could be related to ADHD and RSD. Encourage them to consult a mental health professional for a proper evaluation and support. It's important to remember that everyone's ADHD experience is different, and not everyone will exhibit the same symptoms. Open communication and understanding can help both of you navigate this together. Good luck!
Wow, that literally described me to perfection. Am I your husband?
😅
It wasn't always this bad for me. So bad I wanna check out of life. Ugh. I have a man and I know im losing him
Minutes after my wife passed away in her hospital bed from a brain tumour, I texted her sobbing father (who was also by her side) a picture of her happy during one of our trips, telling him this is how we should remember her. I thought it would ease his grief. It did not.
What do people do when their ADHD is really bad, severe type when its a struggle to get your head together every day. I've been taking prozac from the doc and smoking. I'm creative as F, but just can't get my head together to do normal everyday stuff
I'm not a doctor, but there are several strategies that people with severe ADHD may find helpful. Firstly, it's important to work closely with a healthcare professional who specializes in ADHD, as they can provide appropriate treatment options and support. This may include medication adjustments or alternative medications, therapy (such as cognitive-behavioral therapy or coaching), and developing practical strategies to manage symptoms and improve daily functioning. Additionally, creating a structured routine, breaking tasks into smaller, manageable steps, using reminders and organizational tools, and seeking support from friends, family, or support groups can also be beneficial. It's important to remember that everyone's experience with ADHD is unique, so finding the right combination of strategies and treatments may take time and experimentation.
Yep... I was diagnosed at 48 with ADHD along with sprinkles of other flavours of neurospiciness. *ADH off topic warning!* I like that term, 'neurospicy' is much funner than 'insert acronym-disorder'. HSD is a particularly problematic I reckon... You've gotta have a look at your paradigm when sensitivity is a disorder ffs! Sorry, back on topic now! That was 4 years ago and the extent RSD has affected my life just hit me recently. Ouch. I've hidden all my life, the morphing chameleon of people pleasing, quick change masks of near perfect plausibility.
I completely understand what you're saying. Neurodiversity is a wonderful way to embrace and appreciate the unique variations in our brains, rather than labeling them as disorders. It's refreshing to have a more positive and inclusive term like "neurospicy."
Regarding rejection-sensitive dysphoria (RSD), it can have a profound impact on one's life and self-perception. The experience of feeling hypersensitive to perceived criticism or rejection can be challenging to navigate. It sounds like you've developed coping mechanisms over the years, such as hiding behind masks of people-pleasing and adaptability. Recognizing the impact of RSD is an important step towards understanding yourself better and finding strategies to navigate its effects. Remember, you're not alone in this journey, and there are resources and support available to help you.
Hello from germany👋
Thats nearly the same how i experianced it myself. I think it isnt only being so sensitive about rejection also about acceptance that feels so fucking good it seems adhd with rsd are able to feel so deep anyways. I mean connect with somebody or i would say the longin to connect to somebody is also very strong within me. How you or others experiance it? Please tell me. Thanks!
"So I tried Sales once and that was a nightmare" 😂🤣😂
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Overreaction and ghosting in my experience. I'm sorry for who I hurt, I'm just overly sensitive and I tell my mind to stop this shit. I exercise these feelings off. Don't want to be medicated. I believe this developed ping ponging off of worry warts, hard asses and a gaslighting narcissist father.
It sounds like you have been through a lot and have had to deal with difficult experiences that have left a lasting impact on you. It's important to remember that overreacting and ghosting are coping mechanisms that may have developed as a result of past trauma. However, it's also important to recognize the impact that these behaviors can have on others and take steps to address them. It may also be beneficial to explore other coping strategies and seek support from a therapist or counselor. Medication is not always necessary, but it may be worth discussing with a healthcare professional if you are struggling to manage your symptoms.
Someone just posted RSD on fb and I thought I have that!! Then I watched this video..yup I have that..I am 63 yrs old but I feel like an immature teenager alot of the time..trying to fit in, trying be funny since I don't fit in with my 20 and 30 ish coworkers..I'm a
(hairstylist) I only like conversations one on one( not all of them) and feel most comfortable doing my work because it is what I know and I am pretty good at most.of it..anyway I am quite a mess and lonely I have prob put you to sleep now..
RS and RSD are not the same. RS is specific to ADHD, RSD is not.
U wasted all my time to tell me to go to therapy?