Child Bride interview-Sara
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- Опубликовано: 17 фев 2023
- Soft White Underbelly interview and portrait of Sara,
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I started college at 40 and got my Masters at 52.It's not too late for Sara to go to law school. She is an amazing resilient woman.
Finished my rn at 35. Working on masters now at 53
Going back for my Biology degree at 38! This is inspiring! Thank you 😁
That's amazing! I'm 34 and feeling like I missed out on those kind of opportunities so seeing your post gives me so much hope! Good on you sis!!
@@ellamayoxoxo9510 oh yeah. Don't get hung up on age at all. Life is life. Live it and go for whatever you want. Google " today show 102 year old woman"...great story! 💖
Idk i missed so much school from k-12, I received my HS diploma through an adult ed program, but only enough to graduate - not enough to go to college. It would essentially take 4 years just to complete and associates degree. let alone to actually commit to a major. Both my aunt and uncle went to college in their late fourties. but they attended k-12 normally. i think it makes all the difference.
I love it when Mark just let's them tell their story without interruptions . Many of them probably never have that opportunity .
I agree. I thought at first these were interviews, but really, they're just able to speak about their lives openly with no judgment or interruptions. How cathartic. I wish I had someone to just speak to like this when I went through trauma as a kid.
his questions usually suck so bad and ruin the flow
@@dukeduke2790 hahaha
If a woman interviewer did the exact same thing, would you notice she did not interrupt the interviewee? Just wondering.
Sara, I am in law school right now and I just wanted to tell you that the world needs people like you as lawyers. There are several students much older than you in my class. If it’s age that makes you think you can’t do it - you’re wrong. You can absolutely do it.
“For those who have a why can withstand any how.”
Blessings to you.
i'd even say the older ones are BETTER lawyers!
@@hughneutron5303 Absolutely! They have more life experiences and are much more able read the minds and faces of people. Don't EVER think you'll get away with lying to a "GOOD" attorney. He/She will call you on it before you get the last word out of your mouth. And THOSE types of attorneys are the ones who've been aaround a while. You won't pull the wool over their eyes. They know EXACTLY how to play the game ~ and win. LOL
Muhammad married Aisha when she was 6yrs old and consummated his marriage to her when she was 9 yrs old. He is the example for all mankind in Islam so you tell me if all religions teach this.
⁹9999😢😮the most 😮😮😮of 😮😮😮😮
@@drittenberry1your comment isn't on the same track or even topic as the one you've responded to. 😂 Many people know religion is man-made and written, which is why oppression is always the same as they're written by men in patriarchal societies. Predators have always existed and permeate all levels of government and religious institutions. They crave power and to have their way so of course they are in positions of power. Data has shown that the majority of SA/child molestation is coming from the church. Her entire point of saying what she said is that child molestation isn't okay, and isn't condoned in any moral sense. Many people who are able to see and leave, work through their religious trauma, denounce religion and its overarching control. It's obviously some man-written delusions.
Become a lawyer and advocate for the child brides. You're amazing.
She already is
Why are men so obsessed with having sex with children and marring them? This is a world wide problem and it’s sickening.
Because of power
Also he doesn't have to worry about measuring up because she is an innocent. Men have an incredible fear of not being good enough.
Probably Because for like 95% of human history it was ok. Look up the age of consent from 150 years ago and you’ll see why
Thats kind of a myth though. Like popular belief is that people married at age 11 or 12 in the middle ages but they really didnt accorsing to marriage records from the time @atothetop3779
@@atothetop3779the age of consent is puberty in Mexico isn’t it? Like it ain’t 150 years ago man. It’s now.
Sara my compliments for breaking the cycle of abuse for your own children and being an advocate for so many other young women.
What is the name of the cult? She is protecting them but new children are being abused.
@@lifesavercandy3239 not protecting them, protecting herself and her kids.
She lives in America, not in a freaking Iraq
@@lifesavercandy3239 you have to put yourself in her shoes. she is trying to disassociate herself from the cult as much as possible while still speaking her truth.
@@lifesavercandy3239 It sounds like it might be in the Palo Alto area, so maybe in the Santa Cruz Mountains. A Sufi Center with a Sheik? I know Mt Madonna is up there - but I don’t think that’s Sufi or based on Islamic teachings. Oh, another clue was it started around 1990.
I was born into a sufism cult too. Never thought i would see someone talk about it so thank you Sara for sharing your story! It made me feel less alone and crazy
I pray that you are safe and ok.
@@billwilson5341 i understand why she wouldnt, these cults will stalk, harass, hurt, intimidate people who call them out. Could put her and her kids in danger. i think shes doing more than enough targeting child marriage laws already
It should be talked about more ,so many are unaware , me for example
What's a Sufism cult? Islam has no cults!
I got this author from a ALASKAN STATE TROOPER his name is DR ERIC BERNE M.D it's SEX IN HUMAN LOVING-PDF pg 35 SIX IN 12 BY THE PLANE LOAD.... author DIED 1969 SOME THINGS JUST DONT CHANGE.
My parents wanted me to get married at 16 to a guy that was 20 years or more older than me. I never did it, despite the emotional and physical abuse, I locked myself in my room for days to escape that. I always think what would happened if I wasn’t stubborn? Being stubborn literally saved my life!
Good for you for standing your ground and going your own path and not letting your parents dictate the path you’d take. Hope you’ve found someone/will find someone who makes you happy. 💛
im glad you were able to escape that fate.
Waw. Thank you
These men ate pedophiles
Are not ate
Sara. I live in Washington. I see you've talked to a legislative committee here about ending child marriage. I will be contacting my state-level legislators in favor of this. Thank you Sara and Mark for raising awareness.
Lol Washington is ran by ped0files. Good luck
I’m from Wa and live here currently. Child marriage is legal here?? Wtf!!!
@Izabella Grace Yes, in Washington state with parental consent, you have to be 17. My mom signed off for me to get married at 17 to someone almost 11 years older than me. It took away my teen years and caused so much trauma. I had my first baby right before I was 16, married at 17, and left the country shortly after 18.
It turns out my state senator is a cosponsor so I called her office and voiced my support. I hope it goes through.
@@RachelsSweetie I should do the same. I am in Vancouver, Wa.
This happened in the United States. Let that sink. You can imagine what goes on in India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, etc
The ignorance in this country by natural born citizens is ridiculous. Some states do not have a age limit on how old you can be to marry off your child and the youngest age limit in states that have a limit is 10. 10 years old.. before puberty even starts.. and trust me those involved in this shit are absolutely going to those states. You do not have to live in the state you go to get married in. Like in the FLDS they go to other states to marry off the little girls. If you have to prove you live in the state you go to get an ID in, you absolutely should have to prove you live in the state you are married in. No that won't end this horrible issue but it would slow it down.
Martial rape became ILLEGAL in 1993!
When you live in a country where everyone thinks these things don't happen here and refuse to believe it because it's easier to live in denial than to face the horrible truth, change doesn't come when the masses thinks these things are just fake news or the "libtards" starting unnecessary shit. I've seen people say that they do not believe that child (sex) trafficking even happens here. And at this point in time where we have all the knowledge and proof at our fingertips and you still choose to ignore it, that is intentional ignorance. This is not the 30s and 40s anymore where everyone gets their news from the newspaper or radio.
@@jordanstroop4269 IDK where you got 10 but that isn't true. 4 states have no official minimum age, but still require either parental consent, court approval or both: California, Mississippi, New Mexico, and Oklahoma. 2 states have a minimum age of 15: Hawaii and Kansas. 22 states have a minimum age of 16. The rest are 17 or older. But, that doesn't mean it still isn't a problem.
@@amysnews6808 then they've changed it over the years but there used to be a few states where there was a minimum age, the youngest was 10 that's why I said that.
And I just looked it up and as of March 2024 it's 7 states with no minimum including California. But yes it's still not okay.
Female circumcision happens in the US as well.
Bangladesh is having many protests of women speaking out against this kind of violence
I’m a Muslim from the UK whose extended (I’m talking extremely distant family) are involved in an international Sufi organisation. One “uncle” was discovered to be grooming young children. He was also involved in “fixing” marriages. His antics caused a whole furore at the time and rightly so. I don’t blame Sara at all for withholding information at certain times throughout this interview. These communities are notorious for honour/revenge attacks and killings. Her recovery and her own well-being are the only important things at this point. Wishing you all the best Sara ❤
@ImmigrationActof bro....Indian women are sending satellites to mars, becoming president and performing surgeries. Urban india is a GREAT place for women to live in . far more equal than many western Countries. So your comment is quite ignorant.
Honor???
@ImmigrationActofAre Somalia, Libia, Saudi Arabia and Yemen also Indian? Very different places, all with the same problem of "honour" killings. What they share is religion.
I wonder what sufi order it is I know they are deviant but no one drops their name as to warn the communities
Islam is evil. That's just a fact.
My parents tried to get me to marry their friend who was a doctor when I was barely 15 years old. When I refused they threatened to kick me out of the house. I was a sheltered child. Only allowed to go to school and back home. Rarely allowed to have friends over or go to their houses. I started sneaking out to see a guy a friend introduced me to. He was 24. I got pregnant and my mother forced me to marry him. I did because by that time I was so scared of what was going to happen next at home and not understanding what was happening I did not want someone to go to jail because of me. I was abused in every single way growing up and just wanted out so I did it. He turned out to be very addicted to drugs and alcohol. He was also on parole which I had no idea about before we got married.
I was horrifically abused in that relationship as well and tried leaving many times. I could not work because I was not 16. I could not rent an apartment and yes, I could not file for divorce. I was positively trapped and owned. We never had any food in the house and I dropped from a healthy albeit a little chubby 145 pounds to just above 100 at 5 foot 6 inches in just a few months. It made me so sick. Even more dependant on someone who I absolutely could not depend upon. I had 3 children by the time I was 21 years old but It could have been so much worse. I finally left when I was 3 months pregnant because I was able to get state assistance, go to school and get a good job to support us as a nurse.
Marriage below the age of 18 should be illegal no matter the circumstances. Nobody is able to make those kinds of decisions at that age. The sentencing for pedofile predators needs to be much much harsher. At that age even 2 years is a huge significance in maturity and life experiences. Writing girls off as women is wrong and should absolutely not be allowed ever. I too am doing well now but it took me 20 years to sort through all that garbage. I am happy to hear of another who managed to escape such a horrible situation. Thank you so much for sharing your story and bringing this to light. Perhaps somebody who can change things will watch. It does give me hope for other girls in this sick world.
I can't get my head around that this is our world still in 2023. The stuff of absolute nightmares, and the results of the corrupt and sick systems we created. This woman is an absolute powerhouse. She deserves the highest acknowledgements, by the highest levels of government and the judicial system. THIS is what should be on the nightly news for everyone to see.
Facts
❤
Agreed!
👍 Amen. It just sucks that the government is in on a lot of this stuff
@@gravy4212 The government rubber stamps this stuff!
This is the greatest story of someone denied an education who took what happened to them and is using it to speak for those who can't. What a phenomenally intellectual, well-spoken, inspiring woman you turned out to be, Sara.
I was married at 17. No cults, but our stories are similar in many ways. I went ahead with the wedding because I wanted to be a good person and I believed my only role was wife and mother. Turns out a good person is someone who loves and respects herself and enter into relationships that honor her and her partner. It took decades for me to get where I am today. Society changing helped, but I was the one who did the heavy lifting. By the time I could go to college, it was too late for a traditional career. I became an addiction counselor and loved it.
No kids?
Interesting that she talked about no eye contact, she has been staring at ceiling.
She has no moral obligation to forgive her abusers. No one has obligation to forgive anyone for any dam thing. Its anger that you need to let go but everything else is up to us. Great job Sara for keeping your own boundaries. Good luck and hugs.
Forgiveness is not for the person who abused her, it's for herself. Holding onto things like that hurts you more than just forgiving and letting it go. Forgiveness is a powerful key for healing the soul
@@leilanireed1856 Agree, true forgiveness is for oneself, but must be the result of victims' sole and unpressured choice. No one should feel that they must forgive or they are not a good and moral person. I've seen too many people being told that they must forgive (and have rarely seen victimizers asking for it or being pressure to do so). And forgiveness never means that a victim must put herself in contact with or in a position to be again harmed, physically or psychologically.
@@leilanireed1856forgiveness is for those incapable of revenge. A placation tactic formulated by cult leaders afraid of accountability and nothing more. Those negative emotions are there to motivate you into action. Use them and the world will be improved by your hand. Deny them and the cycle continues in your absence.
By forgiven i was a able to heal...i no longer have hate in my heart...,praying helps heal....dont let your past ruin your future...🌍😇🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿
When forgiveness is thrown out there like a blanket cure-all, most people miss out on the golden opportunity of sitting down and reasoning through the root cause of the problem. Serious mental deficiencies could have been present (in both sides?) at the time of the offense. Ask me how I know!!❤
From the ashes of her shattered and stolen childhood, Sara has rose up and is helping to light the way for other girls and women caught in the hell she was cast into.
She is an articulate, intelligent woman and very strong. Her children should always be proud of what she's doing to help others.
Beautifully said 🥹
Has risen*
You should write ✍️!
This video needs to go viral. I’ve never this subject explained so clearly and first hand.
That point when she said no, I want a divorce and I want my children and she got those things. I applaud every word she said, her strength is exemplary.
When she said..."you can be zero years old and legally get married as long as there is parental consent" ..my heart shattered.
Thank you for speaking up and educating us Sara. You are incredible♥
I think she meant betrothal. It was pretty normal to be betrothed.
In what country can you marry a child at the age of zero 🙄🙄🙄
Wow, the 38:00 mark is SO powerful when she finally vocalizes her true feelings, and puts the hammer down on religious abuse. My heart soars for her! What an amazing interview, by a such a courageous woman!
I had no idea this was so widespread in the U$. it seems to bee growing.
US is full of cults, but it’s the first time I hear of Rumi’s and sufism’s names associated with a cult. Must be so easy to create these criminal organisations to basically scam people who don’t know what these belief systems even stand for.
@@waitz001 Yeah. It’s wide spread because it’s under the umbrella of “religious freedom”. Their religion gives it a legal loophole. Basically keeping ped0philia a tradition.
@@waitz001it's always been this way, and it's actually happening less because less and less people believe or participate in religion. It's a part of the patriarchy. There is so much research and data on this just in the US alone. Most SA and child abuse is coming out of the church. Look it up.
if thish!t is occurring IN EVERY STATE of 🇺🇸, then it is widespread. soooooo, I don't know where you gettin'yo fo....
Stories like this are utterly horrifying and sad. I'm so glad that Sara had the strength and determination not only to leave, but to succeed in making it out alive. Not all victims if these crimes are so lucky. I hope she has nothing but a beautiful and fulfilling life helping others survive the same trials from here on out.
Can’t watch this. “UM”
@@gaylamixon4075
She is trying to speak about traumatic events for goodness sake. Have a little compassion. She isn’t an actress reading a script. These are real people who have no responsibility to “entertain” you.
@#PrisonForJohnnyDepp BS
@#PrisonForJohnnyDepp It’s a little late for this scam Meghan M, I mean Amber.
I feel like extremely reigious people are the most abusive.
THEY ARE THEN USE THAT GOTDAMN BOOK TO OVER SEE THEY FAULTS AND DOING !
The issue is not with "the book," but with the individuals using it to conceal their depravity.
Amazingly well spoken story. She's 40 something now and she still can't speak of her past without tearing up/crying. That speaks volumes of the depth of trauma she clearly fought through and still IS fighting through. Amazing that she's achieved all that she has and has to achieve. Impressive to say the least!!
very true. its sad that she said shes STILL fighting through the brainwashing and dealing with it. Its amazing that shes fighting against this now and helping other young girls
I am a retired teacher from Colorado Springs. I am sorry that you experienced such a traumatic childhood. Thank you for educating me. Keep advocating. Law school is in your future ❤
Sara's story is heartbreaking.l can see why she has disowned her father .
She's a strong intelligent brave young woman who has survived.
❤God Bless Sara ❤
Her eyes are constantly looking up at the ceiling as she talks. Her abuse affects her physically. Not looking in people's eyes is still ingrained in her from childhood. Mentally I can't even imagine her feelings. She's so strong.
She looks up to remember and think.
Storytelling requires memory and she’s looking around, visualising and recalling. When people are thinking about something, they don’t usually hold eye contact the entire time
I do the exact same thing and I wasn’t abused
its incredibly distracting...Ive seen people do this to recall but not to this extent...she is a survivor and I admire her strength. God bless her❤
Trauma recall is very difficult because it has been compartmentalized in the brain for self preservation. She is basically watching a movie scroll in her mind in order to tell events. This is the only way she can tell it without having emotions tied to it. She will start processing this over the next 48 hours in small increments and it will be very painful. Hopefully, she has good tools now to cope after this intensive interview.
Sometimes we as viewers and even the interviewer do not understand the can of worms we are opening.
The pain and suffering that her mother must have gone through was probably tremendous. The fact that she didn't feel abandoned by her mother shows the true bond that they shared and the fight that her mother never gave up on. This was truly an incredible story. Sara is such a strong woman who is using her past to propel the future. She is a leader and will create change.
I did not hear that, I heard her mother failed her as much as her father; but she gives more grace to her mother. Her put her mother in a blanket of grace, she did not know… she was a free spirit…
@@nadegerachaelrose8862the mother reported the abuse and encouraged her to study which counts .
@@nadegerachaelrose8862her mother was up against the power of that infrastructure too; drinking/drugs took the edge off the sheer pain of her own helplessness (while she was figuring things out)!💔
i cant imagine what it would be like having your children taken from you and them being abused in basically every way possible. That must be so hopeless. Im glad this woman had her mother to cling onto,, who knows if she would have had the strength without that one real parent in her life.
@@yyg4632there are thousands of mothers going through this right now in the United States!! There is a Instagram page on the courts who take kids, corrupt c p s etc. it’s heartbreaking!!! This Mother died without telling her kids the truth on the horror she was put through.
As a child of abuse, I understand the fear this childhood carries over to adulthood. I hope speaking helps you move on from your past.
The sad part about this is that it goes on more than we actually know or could imagin. You’re so strong girl and I admire you speaking up and telling your story!
I cannot believe how strong she is. She embrace her pain and walks again. Amazing.
I wish you all the best Sara.
This is the only time I've heard someone have a very similar story to my own on this channel... From the brainwashing to living that lifestyle to thinking this is the right thing your doing ... I've never felt so not alone and although this isn't something to bond over thank you because we both had the strength and power to get away and get our minds right... Thank you for sharing
No, thank you for sharing as well. I wish you all the best in life.
I hope she gets counseling!
Wising you the best ❤️❤️❤️❤️
for U$, heathen women ....this is shocking and appalling. it's scary, really, to know this is going on. power to you, sister❤️🔥
Thank you for sharing. I'm proud of you! It takes a lot of strength to leave a situation like yours. You didn't let fear hold you back! I just left an 18 yr. Abusive relationship. It is the most fearful thing I've done, walking into the unknown. But it was all worth it in the end.
You are amazing Sara. Although you may feel you're still trying to catch up to your peers, in my eyes your strength and bravery has greatly surpassed many people of all ages. Please don't ever stop talking about this. Thank you for what you do 🖤
Stories like this are why I’ve chosen to pursue a career in victim’s services. Sara, thank you for sharing you story and opening this conversation and encouraging everyone to participate because it’s something that should concern all of us.
Sara is such an incredible lady...she's her own coach and also part of her is still a child trapped. But she's come out of it all so powerfully....truly inspiring story Mark ...thanks for having her on your video to share her story. Sara is a fighter and has such a wise spirit 🙌
Bless you for being a very needed advocate against child marriage and all that comes with it. May young girls in this situation hear your story and find the strength they need to get out. I can’t imagine how difficult leaving an abusive relationship is while still navigating being a child/teen.
As we pass by people in our day to day life, we Never would think so many are suffering in silence with so much trauma they've been thru....this is why it's so important to try to be kind to those we encounter......people are going thru things we could Never imagine, and as children no less, the most innocent and vulnerable of all 😥😳❤️
You're absolutely right, Pam..
I teach my children this.
So right! And I think when we do suspect silent suffering, especially in children, we should ask, as did this woman’s teacher.
PamBeforeTheStrom: you are so right. Thus I try to be kind as well. It is very difficult sometimes. Under the negative attitudes we encounter sometimes, may be a soul who is hurting. Sometimes a little kindness goes a long way.
I knew Sara when we were children and she came with her father to visit the grand sheikh in the uk.
I’m so happy that she also managed to escape.
The fact that she went back to school regardless of what that person told her - “Your husband will feel like LESS OF A MAN” if you’re bettering yourself, basically. Lmfao - was extreme proof of how she broke free. That must have been so liberating for her. I love it so much. As someone who grew up very sheltered just for different reasons, I understand wanting to *catch up.* But what you have to know, and what I have to remind myself of is that everyone has been broken in some way at some point. And whether they voice it or not (so many don’t) or they try to project to make you feel like it’s just you with the problem (so many do), the fact is life is not a race. It’s more like a board game where you only get to the end after getting through all the randomized obstacles. The healthiest people know that and are too busy trying to self-improve from THEIR obstacles + help others where they can to think about if they’re ‘caught up’ with everyone else. WITH that said, Sara seems a lot further along in life than she might know.
This is an underrated comment.
Beautifully said.
imagine marrying a child and then being upset you feel like less of a man...
What a story, wow. Sara is the definition of a strong, resilient woman. Such an inspiration.
Hearing you talk about how your kids has switched your whole mentality warms my heart. I smiled when you and your kids are still with you. You’re way stronger than you think. I wish you nothing but the best.
You can tell how hard and painful it is for her to tell her story. God bless her.
Loved seeing her smile and laugh through some of the telling of her story. Shows that she’s healing/healed in some ways and still has inherent joy within. Glad she didn’t let the world completely break her❤
An eye-opening interview. Thank you for sharing this video with us Mark. Religious cults are just brutal. So warped & messed up. 😳🙄🤢😡
Mark your work is making change. Knowledge equals change!
Hello Sara, I’m so sorry you had to grow up abused. I also admire you enormously for going back and finishing your education, advocating for the safety of children. I admire you for taking your children away from their abusive father and bringing them up with a wonderful roll model, you.
What is the name of the cult? She is protecting the cult but new children are being abused.
@@lifesavercandy3239 I rather think that she FEARS the cult, not that she wants to protect them
Sara, my heart absolutely shatters for you and the pain and suffering you were forced to endure. If no one has told you lately, I’m so incredibly proud of you, and your kids are as well. TWO children capable of following their passion with a loving, supporting, role model of a mother. Continue to beat the odds and your resiliency will continue to show ❤
The way her eyes gaze all around as she’s reminiscing… it’s like she’s watching a tape of the memories play in her mind. Very engaging truth teller❤️ Well done connecting us with this one, Mark… thank you!
I'm having a rough time right now, and seeing and hearing stories about people who've persevered under terrible circumstances keeps me from just totally giving up. Sara, you are amazing. It's not fair that we come into this world and we don't have any choice of the parents we have.
Don't give up! 🫂❤️
I feel that, 2022 was a trying year for me and these videos remind me that while I didn’t get much guidance growing up, I also know others have overcome far worse.
Remain strong I’m also having the shittiest time right now the last 6 years. Stay strong
Yes very true.
Awwwwroooooooooo❤️🔥power to you, sister🤘
I'm so proud of her. She went back to school, worked and became extremely independent. I'm so proud that she had the strength and good sense not to conform to what he wanted and got herself out of it. She's such a strong lady to take charge of her future without his consent. I knew he was going to be slick when she said he took the kids with him. I knew he would try to keep them from her. I'm so glad her brother helped her and she went back to get them. She's very brave and a Warrior for not backing down and allowing him to control her whole life. I hope she knows how courageous she truly is
The U.S. states that have banned child marriage with no exceptions are DE, NJ, MN, NY, CT, VT, RI, PA, MI and MA as of July 2023.
Sara is an inspiration for anyone trying recover from trauma. She’s so extremely smart and resilient, and I hope that even on her tough days she remembers that. You go girl!!
Her mother abandoned her children. This fact seems very overlooked.
We don't have enough information, who knows how was her mother's childhood, maybe she had been through similar traumas...
Love the courage, resilience & selfless compassion displayed by people like her who somehow manage to transform their lived tragedies into helpful educational opportunities for the rest of us.
Almost every story I’ve watched on this channel creates humbling gratitude & perspective on a life that’s been relatively idyllic by any comparison.
Ironically it’s most always the unimaginably strong who suffer at the hands of the reprehensible &
incompetently weak.
i'm so proud of Sara. given all the obstacles, lack of resources and support, she was able to separate from that horrific situation. she's quite impressive in becoming educated, independent, self directed, and being an advocate for others in the same scenario.
The fact that CPS was called and nothing was done, as if that won't cause her to be abused for telling on her abuser really pissed me off .
Seeing her eyes just made me feel sad and hopeless. The pain she experienced growing up still affects her and it is sad to see.
I noticed this after a few minutes too 😔
It’s so devastating she still looks up to her mother, when the mother was also a cause of her traumatic childhood. I’m glad she has enough strength to move on with her life in a positive direction. I hope your life gets better ❤
I don’t think she is at a place yet where she can look at her mom’s contribution to what happened to her. When Mark asked if she blamed her mom she hesitated and said she always would tell herself as a child her mom loved her. She is still telling herself that and now that her mom has passed she probably would feel guilty to look at her mom’s contribution, but for healing, one day she might have to open that door.
I hope that dad suffers greatly
I think she’s also now old enough to look at her mom as a person with her own demons who tried to help in her limited capacity. Her mom was a drug addict and an alcoholic with an extremely abusive ex who physically kept her children away. She wasn’t a functioning adult who neglected her children. Even in her addiction she helped her child when she reached out finally. You have to look at parents as people too. It’s the ones with all the access to do right that chose to be abusive and even dangerous to their children’s survival like her dad.
She herself explained how she still has to let her children see her abuser even today, even when she is now aware of the level of abuse, she has no power to protect her children from it. She sees the humanity in her mom, because when given the chance, even when in the dark herself, her mom chose her. Helped out with the kids. But she clearly was a sick person that needed professional help to go back to a semblance of normal. It would be very hard to blame her. But I do agree that regardless of her reasons, she contributed majorly to her children’s trauma. She could have done a lot more to try and help. Like call the cops or CPS to do wellness checks frequently etc. aloy could have been saved.
@@anonymousone9699 I think just calling the cops or cps would be passing the buck. Her mom’s contribution goes far deeper than that.
Her mom contributed by not giving up drugs and alcohol to be a mom.
Her mom chose this man to be the mother of her children.
Her mom chose to walk away.
To throw the blame on dad snd make mom the victim doesn’t resolve anything. It just excuses mom’s behavior and unjustly casts all the blame on dad.
I am sure the dad has his sob story too. Most abusers don’t become abusers because they think it will be fun. They become that way because they have experienced abuse or trauma themselves. So dad is probably a victim too but both the parents had the responsibility to break the cycle of abuse with their own children or choose not to have children until they got their own lives in order. Neither chose either path so both are guilty. Both can be forgiven but for healing she probably is going to have to come to terms with mom is just as guilty as dad.
@@stst77 Yes, Sara's mother also could have demanded her visitation rights--you know, instead of throwing a rock through the window and then disappearing for a couple of years.
Her story is heart breaking. Every time her voice cracks or she seems to lose herself I have to choke back tears. What she went through was pure evil guised as holiness. This is the most evil anyone can execute.
Further props/kudos/love to Sara for exiting the abuse and trauma cycles and showing your kids what true strength is. Bravo!
What a powerful story. Sara congratulations on being such a wonderful mom to your kids. I hope they can see the amazing mom they have.
What a remarkably courageous woman. I really do hope other women in similar situations can find help, comfort and inspiration from her story. Best wishes, Sara.
Thank you Mark for this interview. Thank you , Sara . Thank you Sara . Your work will allow so many to understand exactly what this is. Good luck in all your future endeavors.
Sarah, you should be SO freakin PROUD of yourself. You have come through so much, and you are extremely strong. Don’t ever worry about catching up to your peers. We are all on a different path. You are doing so well.
It is SO IMPORTANT to tell people "they can". She's told she would make a great lawyer, she has hope, she tries.
The first person that told me was my husband and I can honestly say I had no idea I was so good at so many things. It was just that he believed in me so I had hope in myself.
Healing helps too....but that little bug in the ear of...."you can" is SO powerful.
What a beautiful woman. What strength! She's a wonderful speaker. So efficient and heartfelt with her delivery. Not annoying at all. Amazing person. Thank you both!
Thank you Sara… to be able to tell your story with us, as painful as it was, shows how strong you are. Hoping you find peace and happiness in your life.. best wishes
Don't compare yourself to anybody Sara. Don't say you are still "catching up." You have no competition other than yourself and you have survived and grown time and time again through your life. Maybe your growth is not a textbook success, you are successful. You did it, took care of your children, worked to take care of them and yourself. You are not an attorney but you are a true survivor. You deserve to keep going and thriving, go ahead, keep going.
Sara is leaps and bounds ahead of many, even ahead of those that had a normal childhood.
I wish Sara well as she fights for the rights of others.
This was really triggering to hear. I went through the same thing. My dad basically joined a cult too. I remember he and the priest taking my sister and I to Baskin Robbins in order to tell us that we weren’t going to see my mom again. The more of an interference or burden we became in his life (with religion, his girlfriends, or marriages), the more abusive he would become. It took me such a long time to figure out and claim my worth, after years of physical, emotional, and spiritual abuse. May have been “late,” but I made something out of myself.
Well done, best wishes moving forward.
I hope your mother was able to be in your life.
WOW! The fact that someone at any age can get married with parental acceptance and then can not get out of it because they are not look at as an adult legally, that system is completely corrupt and suspicious. Prayers for Sara and her family, I hope the rest of her life and her children's is filled with happiness and joy.
If you can be entered, into a marital contract, as a child...
Legally, how do you then become the spouses' property? This confuses me. They should be able to divorce, at the least like anyone in a marriage contract, in the States.
I'm baffled, how does a child that can't be employed or serve, in the military qualify, for marriage, in any State?
If a religion, dictates children as property, does that mean they are recognized as such, by law due, to religious freedoms?.. I'm sorry.
I don't expect you, to answer these questions but my mind, is spinning ig.
maybe they need the parental acceptance to end it as well
Such a brave woman. Thank you for sharing your story and for being an advocate for others. I pray you have healing and peace.
She experienced basically all types of abuse dealing with these people. I'm so happy to see her and her kids are thriving and got out of that turmoil. A damn rollercoaster. It's so amazing to see how empowered she was through her own first paycheck.
Thank you for being willing to share your story, Sara. I know you are not fully healed but you are so clear in your understanding of what happened to you. You give me hope that my most vulnerable clients can truly grow beyond the horrible experiences they have suffered to access the joy and love other humans have tried to strip from them. I respect your resilience and commitment to making change.
It is unforgivable to harm children in the way that is happening today as they have to live with lifelong consequences of the abuse. Thank you Sara for speaking out and actively putting a stop to this. You are amazing.
..... Sadly we see examples of people that were harmed in their childhood every day on soft white underbelly
I haven’t even finished watching yet but realize what a strong , intelligent and beautiful woman you are. I hope you can live the rest of your life with total peace. I can’t imagine going through this type nightmare as a young child. So sorry you had to endure.❤
Sara, you SO INSPIRING and DEFINITELY took your the loving and intelligent mother, despite the abuse you and your mother went through . Your mother is be SO PROUD of you and she still looks over you! You ROSE UP above all everything and followed your ( and her dreams) of reaching a higher education and providing your children a SAFE & happy life, PLUS advocating awareness and changes in the law…LOVED your story! You are SO BEAUTIFUL… both inside and out!!❤️from Montreal
Couldn’t have said it better! My sentiments exactly! Sara is among the bravest women in the world. And she is making positive change - taking a horrific situation and bringing from it something wonderful: a stop to this atrocious form of child abuse!
You are amazingly strong and you are not "10 years behind". Your path to educate yourself is to be admired. I wish you an incredible life for you and your kids. xo
Sara, you are so strong. You broke a horrible cycle of abuse for yourself and your children. The things that go on right by us or not that far away is incredibly horrific to me. Keep healing your suffering. Keep fighting for yourself and all the precious children. Sending your heart so much love and peace. 🤍☮️🕊️💟🤍
I wanted to write one last thing, Sara you are brave, strong and a amazing human being. Thankyou for finding the courage and strength to stand up and find your voice. You are amazing. Hold Fast. ❤
These interviews break my heart.
Of all those interviewed by Soft White Underbelly, Sara is the one that touched my heart the most. Bless this lovely lady. I admire her very much. I have my own story by being married to a brutal man. I'm disabled today because of the beatings I received from him. I also went back to school. Won't go into my own life...I was just so touched by this young lady. Bless her and her children. I hope the very best for her and her children. I was also told I was a horrible kid. I'm an American to say the least. Go figure. I'm 70-yrs-old now. I have 2 children, a son and a daughter, and 3 grown grandchildren. Yes pain, hurt and hate will eat you up if you don't see it for what it is. I, myself, a lot like Sara in many ways. Once again, I wish her well and wish the VERY best for her!! She deserves it, and so much more. What a wonderful and lovely human being.
Sara's story is a prime example of the damage religion causes. Not limited to her father's specific religion/denomination/sect/belief system/cult/what have you. Stuff like this happens all the time across different religions, people, ethnicities, and households everywhere. I'm glad Sara and people like her have been able to overcome their past and find the strength to move on.
Indeed. And even though plenty of organized religions are also responsible for an uncountable amount of good.
We need ti be able to have an honest conversation, about both the good and bad.
Like, organized religions are genuinely responsible for the creation of major stepping stones in human civilization. Be it, in maths/scientific communities, public education, globalization/multi national languages. Creating similarities / unified between groups of people who would otherwise not have any.
( Though, they’ve also been used ti cause many wars as well.)
For the language part - Iys not just with Romance languages + Latin, and Arabic with abrahamic religions, but we can even see this with Buddhism/Hinduism and Sanskrit into Burmese, Hindi, and many other SEA/W Asian languages. Or how organized religions protected people.
But, with things like the churches started to oppose sciences. Telecommunications, and other advancements both unifying and educating people, more and more governments.
A scary thing about religions now, is even though religion is just a tool so it can be used for anything. Is that human weaponry is becoming so powerful single individuals and small groups of individuals can cause ungodly amounts of damage.
So anything that has a pattern of extremism and sources violence/conflict ( even if it promotes peace too) is just far too risky.
I’ve seen religions save lives, it’s one of the only things that actively combats humanities growing issue with depression, also addiction.
I’ve seen it be responsible for making people better individuals. ( even though personally I would like to give credit to the person themselves as they made the decision / action most of who I talked to, stated “it wasn’t me. If it wasn’t for my religion/god I wouldn’t have done the right thing”. So I can’t really argue with them about themselves)
But again, there’s just so so so so much harm too. As it’s a tool, a nefarious person will find ways to use said religion to do nefarious things.
Like marrying a fucking child. Claiming “you can’t question me, prophet Muhammad did the same.”
I just get frustrated as people get so extreme about religion. Either opposing it or for it. But, we as a civilization need to get away from extremism, to be able to genuinely move forward, and find ways.
Because, even religious people HATE when other religious people abuse scriptures to get away with evil.
But, still they’re forced to protect them more often then they’d like, as they feel threatened by the extremists who oppose it.
Like, we can find ways for both to exists. Find those using it for evil, while protecting those who genuinely practice it to become better individuals.
@@notsoberoveranalyzer8264 All that, and hell is still very real and very bad and people like me can spot those speeding to it like a bullet, unless they get a Saviour from it. There is only one. Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me. John 14:6 KJV
I'd rather sound extreme for being critical of religion than associate myself with a cult. The thing about cults/religious extremism/fringe ideologies is that anyone can be roped in, intelligent people, people who were once good and/or mean well wind up pissing away their reputations and credibility as human beings all for having let their guard down for a split second. Different people, different religions, same story. Scary stuff. Despite what "good" may have come out of faith-based organizations in the now-distant past, "mistakes" repeated more than once are choices. It doesn't take faith or belief or being a part of a group to make yourself a better person.
Amen, pun intended, (sarcastically of course)
@@Morlok616 "better persons", persons with better morals than I, are in hell right now for rejecting Jesus. It is by his grace through your faith alone to be Saved from there.
1Cor. 15:3-4 For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures;
And that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures:
I wish Mark could interview someone from the Jonestown Massacre . Maybe a family member like his biological son Stephan or an ex cult member . It’s been probably 40 years since it happened.
David Thibideaux or however you spell his name, from the Waco massacre. Is a really great person and he is very open about his story. He'd be a great interview.
The Jonestown Massacre had only one survivor - a very lucky young lady who was able to literally out run the adults trying to catch her and kill her
At 42, it's okay to cry. In fact you will still cry for many more years to come. There will be triggers that will make you cry. I hope you heal.
Sara - you broke so many cycles. And you continue breaking them, not only for your own family. It must be so hard, facing all of this pain to save your children. But you're doing it. I admire you so much. I am so grateful you shared your story.
Thank you for sharing your story Sara, and I’m SO sorry that you went through that, it’s truly heartbreaking. It’s so unfair that that in this world, victims need to work on themselves and go to therapy….in order to make sense out of nonsense, while perpetrators don’t see any need to self-reflect and improve.
I’d rather be Sara than the perpetrators of her abuse. Better sinned against than sinning. She’ll know what it is to love and be loved and they never will.
I think she is going to inspire many people in similar situations to recognise the reality of what they're going through and get help as a result, it was a really powerful and genuine message towards the end. What an inspiration.
Sara, you are a phenomenal woman and such a warrior! Deepest respect to you for being a strong survivor and advocating for change. Your children have the coolest role model ever.
I have never thought about the fact that a married child has no adult legal rights. Thank you for bringing awareness to this topic overall. It is needed for sure.
Sara, if you are reading this, you are absolutely the hero in your story- and in your children’s story. Thank you for sharing.
It sounds to me like you’ve probably far exceeded the success of your peers. Keep going, keep growing, and keep being an advocate! Bless you Sara ❤
Marriage under the age of the 21 should be illegal regardless of parental permission. If you aren’t old enough to drink, you’re not old enough to make a decision to get married
Children should *never* be married. Even with parental consent. Your story & courage is so inspiring. Brava!
Thank you for being brave enough to tell your story and raise awareness.🙏🏾
Wow. You can still hear the pain in her voice. What a brave and special woman.
This video makes me so proud to be contributing to your channel monthly....Just saying. These interviews are PRICELESS. To see human beings as they are and hear their stories helps me recognize every day that you don't know what life is behind the people we walk by or encounter briefly. 💓💓
I was born and raised in Colorado Springs and it just breaks my heart to know that something like this was even going on in our own backyard. I'm so sorry for your loss of a childhood, but know that you are worthy and you don't have to compete with your peers. Your story reaches hearts that you have no idea the impact that you can make by sharing your story and you can only have that story by going through what you've been through. Thank you for sharing, may love surround you always ❤
You may feel like you have a lot to catch up on, but, you are years ahead in passion and purpose. Thank you for sharing your voice!
It’s amazing that she made it through. She became an advocate on top of escaping. She is so strong!
I too had an abusive childhood and the effects are long lasting but I've learned at nearly 60yrs that it's never too late to have a happy childhood. Look after your inner child. Lots of love to you.
You are so brave to share your story! I appreciate your courage. You're doing great work both for yourself, your kids, and for the greater good of the world at large. Thank you.
I love it at 26:08 when she starts chuckling. She has a beautiful smile and deserves to have lots of laughter in her life. I'm amazed at how composed she is telling this story. It's heartbreaking, and she deserved better. ♥
Thank you for sharing your story! You are so brave for standing up to your husband, your dad and to the system. Even though you didn’t become a lawyer officially … you are in my eyes… because you are defending the helpless!!! I know you have changed so many lives already ❤ sending you love❤️
In Texas, 1953, at age 13, my mom was impregnated by rape. My grandmother lied about her age and married her to a man in his early 20’s. Mom had been abused her whole life, which continued in her 2 marriages until the death of my dad in 2006. 😢
:(
so sad
Thank you for sharing your story, for creating awareness and for helping these helpless young children!!!!❤