Why we no longer aspire towards kids 🪴

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  • Опубликовано: 28 сен 2024
  • If you really want them, then of course you should 🤗 but you’re not sure, you don’t actually have to. It doesn’t matter what others think. This is just our story.
    Special thanks to my dearest uncle Kenneth Yeo for the wedding footage 😍
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    #childfreebychoice #childless #minimalism

Комментарии • 672

  • @reginesinatra8213
    @reginesinatra8213 4 месяца назад +199

    The people who judge. Have pieces missing within themselves. When you are so happy and full , you are too busy being happy to judge. Thank you for your inspiration.

    • @tatiananugent8434
      @tatiananugent8434 4 месяца назад +14

      Yes, yes and yes! People who are on an authentic journey are often more focused on their own growth and fulfilment, which leaves little room for judgment of others. They recognize that happiness and fulfillment come from living in alignment with their true selves, whether that involves having children or not. This mindset fosters a sense of respect for the diverse paths others may take in their lives. Embracing authenticity means understanding that there isn't a one-size-fits-all approach to happiness, and that everyone’s journey is unique and valid.💖

    • @reginesinatra8213
      @reginesinatra8213 4 месяца назад

      @@tatiananugent8434 beautiful x

    • @ccjohnson6251
      @ccjohnson6251 8 дней назад

      Have you ever thought about what you are saying, you sound like a parrot.

  • @beaulieuc8910
    @beaulieuc8910 3 месяца назад +89

    I am 58 and childfree. No regrets. I have lots of hobbies and I volunteer. I don't have pets but I love my wildlife in my garden. I am learning to be alone as one day I will be

  • @ronnyb9416
    @ronnyb9416 4 месяца назад +287

    We have NO kids... retired at 47... we have lived overseas and we have been traveling the past 15 years... No money issues and we have good health....... best decision ever with no regrets at all.

    • @JeanVoronkova
      @JeanVoronkova  4 месяца назад +16

      happy to hear you are happy with your choices and no regrets. Thanks for sharing with me 🙏

    • @kathleenwang
      @kathleenwang 4 месяца назад +11

      that's my goal as well!!!!!! retire early is what I look forward to. im not into kids, like other people's kids, but children is not my thing maybe..

    • @jade-oh5wn
      @jade-oh5wn 3 месяца назад +6

      It's not too late. Have some kids!

    • @ljkoh20052000able
      @ljkoh20052000able 3 месяца назад +4

      Great life!

    • @wordsw
      @wordsw 3 месяца назад +27

      ​@@jade-oh5wn have some respect. It's not on everyone's path.

  • @christineflygirl
    @christineflygirl 4 месяца назад +52

    Having kids is a 20 year commitment (or more...!). I have two sons in their twenties now, I have no regrets, they are my pride and joy, but many of my friends have chosen not to have any, and I totally respect that. It's a harsh world out there to raise good and compassionate human beings. Enjoy your life the way you choose to live it. And ignore people who would want you to change it!

    • @JeanVoronkova
      @JeanVoronkova  4 месяца назад +5

      I love that you have kids and they light up your life but you don't think everyone else must be poppin out some and can see that it's just different life paths

    • @Bav92
      @Bav92 4 месяца назад +4

      20 years out of 75 honestly doesn’t sound bad at all. I’m not a parent but I would be happy to spend what is probably less than 1/3 of my time with kids. Especially because they can also enrich your life and bring out traits you never knew you had.

    • @Fan-zx1lz
      @Fan-zx1lz 3 месяца назад

      ​@@Bav92Having kids into this over populated world is doing a crime to the children Born, they have to fight for basic necessities like food, Water due to high inflation.

  • @Johanneslol11
    @Johanneslol11 4 месяца назад +48

    I am 33 and my wife is 30. We both dont feel the need for a child. We are happy together, we enjoy going out together. My mother always says "don't create a new life until you have lived your own life" you meaning do the things you want to do first and then you can have childeren if you choice. And if you don't, that is fine to. 😊

    • @Kat-s5f
      @Kat-s5f 3 месяца назад +5

      Your mother is a wise woman. My husband I are similar in age to you and your spouse. For the longest time… I was against having kids. Then all of my friends starting talking about having them because a lot of my friends were getting pregnant. I started to feel like maybe I was missing out… and now I’m back to not wanting any kids. Any time I think I want them… and then I am around someone’s child… I instantly change my mind. I want to work on myself more and ensure my husband and I have an amazing life together. I don’t want to struggle financially or have strain in my marriage or identity to have a child.

  • @sansan838383
    @sansan838383 4 месяца назад +44

    “You are called crazy or worse, for dancing because they don’t hear your music.”

  • @michellehuynh8451
    @michellehuynh8451 4 месяца назад +73

    My partner and i dont have kids and we totally agree on everything you said. We feel like we are having an amazing time and life goes by soo fast, we just dont want to be bogged down with kids. Cheers to a well-made decision. 😜 🍻

  • @jaredheymann
    @jaredheymann 4 месяца назад +32

    Thanks for sharing, Jean! I'm very happy to have found your channel. My wife and I also decided not to have kids, and we've been married since we were 23. Each year, we had "the vote" if this was the year. As time went by, we looked at our life together, and decided it wasn't right for us to interrupt what we had, and we continued to grow and be fulfilled with our relationship. We've had some amazing opportunities to travel and gain experiences that wouldn't have been possible if we made other choices. We celebrated 20 years married this week! No regrets! Live YOUR life!

  • @phooongtion
    @phooongtion 4 месяца назад +30

    Same here: no kids, a nice investment and retirement portfolio, time, hobbies, healthy relationship! I've got a great life that works for me and I'm happy :)

    • @ccjohnson6251
      @ccjohnson6251 8 дней назад +1

      what else can you do? You need to accept it, and you might as well try to convince yourself you did the right thing.

    • @phooongtion
      @phooongtion 8 дней назад

      @@ccjohnson6251 u mad?

    • @phooongtion
      @phooongtion 2 дня назад

      ​@@ccjohnson6251 U mad?

    • @ccjohnson6251
      @ccjohnson6251 2 дня назад +1

      @@phooongtion Short term thinking is a sign of low IQ

  • @shivasuresh5957
    @shivasuresh5957 Месяц назад +9

    My 8 year old son is such an important part of my life. The joy I feel when I spend time with him is so special. That said, I don't judge others who don't feel the same way about having kids. We are all different and should have respect for those differences. One path is not better than the other. Thoughtful video Jean...

  • @KertamoAybir
    @KertamoAybir Месяц назад +11

    "I will always be grateful to my parents. They truly loved and supported me. I try to give back to my elderly mother. Looking back, although I had a great life, I can see the struggles my parents went through. As a child, I already felt like, 'I don't want that type of life.' In my twenties, I decided never to have children. Now that I am in my fifties, I realize that only now do I have the maturity to have children. So, I made the right decision."

    • @dr.gaosclassroom
      @dr.gaosclassroom Месяц назад

      You are a lucky man!! I think you will be a great father if you choose to be one!!

    • @rpaafourever7908
      @rpaafourever7908 25 дней назад +2

      @@dr.gaosclassroom Yes but he shouldn't be with a much younger woman now just to have kids. He ought to choose a woman in her 40s at the very least to take the chance or adopt or get an ethical surrogate.

  • @dukey4771
    @dukey4771 4 месяца назад +39

    Everything comes down to the same thing, so long as you're happy and not harming anyone then that what's right for you and your life.

  • @bumblebee_ms
    @bumblebee_ms 4 месяца назад +73

    I'm the same, childfree for now. Selfish are those who have kids and abuse them.

    • @JeanVoronkova
      @JeanVoronkova  4 месяца назад +32

      yeah i'm with you. Nothing sadder than having kids only to neglect them and resent them for wanting your attention.

    • @Iamanewcreature
      @Iamanewcreature 4 месяца назад +11

      @@JeanVoronkova that’s right. most can’t even take care of themselves (financially and also mentally/physically) yet they want to bring an innocent baby into this world thinking they can ‘take care’ of them?

  • @MazGun
    @MazGun 4 месяца назад +77

    Me and my older sister choose to child free too. For her it's because she doesn't like children to begin with, and for me because i enjoy living single. More freedom and i can take care my true self properly. Being people pleaser in the past making me forget to love myself. This world is already jam packed too, making younger generation hard to live. Bless for you all.

    • @KatAsp312
      @KatAsp312 4 месяца назад +10

      This is true for me too. At 37 it’s now time to start looking after myself well and enjoying my life, and I’m actually grateful I didn’t go down the kid-road or it’d all be about that right now, and I’d still be neglecting myself. Best wishes to you 🙂

    • @mylesleggette7520
      @mylesleggette7520 2 месяца назад +1

      You do you, and I'm glad you're enjoying living for your self. But please don't spread this nonsense about there being too many people. Every country in the world bar a literal handful has a negative birth rate, and promoting a culture of childlessness only accelerates this trend. The path to a lonely, depopulated world is already laid out, and it will be a struggle to change course.

    • @berserk9564
      @berserk9564 Месяц назад

      Glad i had good father that has a trad principle and legacy

    • @whitneyanders5945
      @whitneyanders5945 Месяц назад +3

      Such wowserism! There are more births than deaths globally so what’s the problem? If the birth rate is above zero, it’s not negative. There are and will always be humans being born. A smaller population is a good thing. Nothing good can come from more and more and more people.

  • @drnicolebeaumont7884
    @drnicolebeaumont7884 4 месяца назад +157

    I don’t have any children and never thought l would. I am 54 now. Happily married for now 14 years.

    • @shapeoftimes
      @shapeoftimes 4 месяца назад +9

      Same here, we're both 54 and don't have children. We did try though, for a number of years, but I think it was more due to the pressure of society and parents, but it didn't happen. We've been married for 31 years and have no regrets. Maybe everything does happen for a reason 🙂

    • @asavannah7439
      @asavannah7439 4 месяца назад +8

      My husband and I are 46 and 49 and happily married for 19 years without children.

    • @IvanaRock
      @IvanaRock Месяц назад

      You have a roommate

  • @JazzyLou18
    @JazzyLou18 3 месяца назад +9

    I’m 39 and spend time supporting my friends going through divorce with kids. It’s hell on earth for them. Kids are great when it all goes well.

    • @JeanVoronkova
      @JeanVoronkova  3 месяца назад +6

      i do think the saddest is when they get saddled with adult issues that they had nothing to do with...

  • @rohitk9429
    @rohitk9429 4 месяца назад +21

    Great video and message. Main takeaway is that there are many ways for us humans to live a meaningful, fulfilling mortal and brief life in this eternal reality, and it needs inner reflection to find our own paths. Also, not caring about conventional thinkers is important as they are living an outdated reality and will project their own misery/toxicity onto you. There's only one way to live a miserable life - and that's not living the authentic life meant for you.

  • @siara6461
    @siara6461 7 дней назад +1

    I love this. I'm a mother and I love being a mother but I totally see the appeal of a childless/childfree life, so much freedom and fun. You do you girl

  • @wordsw
    @wordsw 3 месяца назад +8

    Thanks for sharing. I am 51 no kids. Love the freedom.

  • @angelwings5705
    @angelwings5705 4 месяца назад +25

    I’m turning 43 only child never been married. I think finding the right partner with similar values is Crucial. To grow old and have friendship with. Having a child it is a blessing and not everyone can have one.

  • @ART-kp9cn
    @ART-kp9cn 4 месяца назад +7

    Great video. I have a two year old and while I love being a parent and have absolutely no regrets, I can see where having kids is not for everyone- the sleepless nights, the time commitment, the seemingly constant tantrums. Not everyone is cut out to be a parent, so people should always respect other's decisions. We all take different paths in life and the route to happiness is different for everyone.

  • @IslandGal96816
    @IslandGal96816 3 месяца назад +7

    I don't have kid, either, and don't want to have one because I know I am selfish, I want free time, do what I want with my own time ... like if I want to sleep/watch TV, I just go sleep/watch TV any time and in peace ☺️
    Hubby is with me. He once told me, better to have niece/nephew, they come and they go home 😂

  • @shannonchristopherphotography
    @shannonchristopherphotography 3 месяца назад +3

    I've watched your videos for years and have gotten great value, but this resonated above all the others. To top off no kids I'm also single and very content. Ironically my career as a family photographer gives me great purpose. Thank you Jean for posting a video I'm certain many will grateful for. I know I am.

    • @JeanVoronkova
      @JeanVoronkova  3 месяца назад +1

      thanks for leaving us this kind note. It is a very fortunate thing to be as we are, content & living each day with purpose 🌻😍 so happy you're in this place

  • @Debbiesdilemmas
    @Debbiesdilemmas 4 месяца назад +11

    It’s everyone’s right to do what’s right for them as a couple. The sad thing is if you want and cannot have. My husband and I tried for years with no success. Long story short we adopted and that was the right choice for us. I believe you can be equally fulfilled with or without children depending on the lifestyle you choose and that both partners agree. I see Jean and her husband living this amazing life and obviously it is the right thing for them. I’m sure many people would be jealous of this beautiful life and I think I would have been very happy living this life up to a certain point. I am so grateful that my husband and I pursued parenthood to the point of adoption as I know in our hearts we would have regretted it had we not.

  • @dalaov5258
    @dalaov5258 4 месяца назад +8

    Nobody's Business what you do with your life. And you are contributing and having a valid Life by sharing your experiences with this video and channel. Keep up the great work

  • @martinatravers330
    @martinatravers330 4 месяца назад +8

    Thank you for sharing something so personal. Nobody as a right to judge you. It's your life. You only get to live once so life your life not the life others think you should live. ❤❤

  • @hellotinashe
    @hellotinashe 4 месяца назад +39

    I’m 39 and my husband is 51, we had our son 2 years ago. I never grew up vision boarding kids and instead was such a career woman (and still am, just with tremendous balance) but boy, having that little guy has been my biggest life reward.

    • @wheatstonebridge
      @wheatstonebridge 3 месяца назад

      Isnt that way too old to have a kid?

    • @Isaidso-hz7kg
      @Isaidso-hz7kg 3 месяца назад +3

      ​@@wheatstonebridgeyou are being rude

    • @MichelleNovalee
      @MichelleNovalee Месяц назад

      @@wheatstonebridgeit’s only too old to have kids when in menopause. Nature makes the rules. Many unexpected pregnancies happen later in life because that’s when women dump the most eggs.

    • @hellotinashe
      @hellotinashe Месяц назад

      @@wheatstonebridge 35 and 48...I guess we were lucky :).

  • @domtam6571
    @domtam6571 Месяц назад +1

    As always, thank you Jean. I see you as a life coach. Your channel continues to inspire me to LIVE and not worry about the small stuff.

  • @SuiGenerisAbbie
    @SuiGenerisAbbie 4 месяца назад +19

    People do not need to have kids.
    It is not legally mandated after all!

    • @Iamanewcreature
      @Iamanewcreature 4 месяца назад

      Even if it is ‘legally mandated’, why would you just listen to them? Stand up and fight.

    • @SuiGenerisAbbie
      @SuiGenerisAbbie 4 месяца назад

      @@Iamanewcreature Fight? With whom, pray tell?
      My comment was meant to reassure Jean that choosing not to have kids, aka ankle biters, is a wise choice and nothing to feel guilty about. That's all.

    • @Iamanewcreature
      @Iamanewcreature 4 месяца назад

      @@SuiGenerisAbbie I’m an agreement with you, just saying even if it is ‘legally mandated’ that shouldn’t be a reason to have kids, if you don’t want to.

  • @keylaquesada3462
    @keylaquesada3462 23 дня назад +1

    I am 38, married and 3 kids and never before I felt so in companion as right now, planning all together, travelling all together, learning together or just staying in home preparing the meal , always there is something new to do everywhere, monotony doesnt exist in our everyday, you learn something new with kids and from them. Never before I have been so active phisically and emotional as I do now 😂😂and I don't regret, the only I regret is ;why I dont have them when younger? Planning a family is a carefully decision "of two", not an option. If you or your couple have doubts or insecure about so stay alone and dont try it.

  • @uhnschlek8827
    @uhnschlek8827 4 месяца назад +6

    A child was never asked for their consent to be pulled into this world. So, I imagine, whoever is pulling that soul into this realm better have a darn good stack of resources to provide for the child to make amends for the kidnapping.

  • @DE6553
    @DE6553 4 месяца назад +2

    A big THANK YOU for sharing your thoughts so honestly and reflected. I am 59 and have raised my son (32) as a single working mum. I got married and had him because everyone else around me did so. But my marriage failed within one year and raising him was hard and challenging, but also brought out the best in me. I love him very much and wouldn't want to miss him. However, he does not want kids, his girlfriend neither - it was difficult for me to accept and part of me still hopes they will decide to have kids because I would love to have grand kids. But I know, this is one of the not-so-good reasons you mention. It's them who should WANT and FEEL it to be able to cope with the challenges kids bring along. Yes, they might regret it later on, but I also regret a couple of decisions in my life that are irreversible, and yet I am a happy person, so what's the point.

  • @SurpriseMeJT
    @SurpriseMeJT Месяц назад +1

    I have hobbies and after I travelled enough, I realized that those experiences started feeling less amazing (it's really just consumption afterall) and adding more so-so experiences really lost it's luster after already having so many awesome ones. I'm an older dad and despite the extra work involved with raising children, when I look at my children and watching them evolve, its just so satisfying - moreso than taking another trip or buying more stuff.
    When I look at my children, I look at them as vessels of me and my wife which will continue on once I'm we're long gone.
    It's not just culture which expects us to have kids, it's basic biology.

  • @jasonjason1196
    @jasonjason1196 4 месяца назад +5

    Beautiful video Sis 💯💯 Totally agree with all the messages.. and really love the peaceful theme and feeling your videos always bring with it.
    Wish ❤️❤️ You and Hubby V ❤️❤️ have a very meaningful and happy life together 🙏🙏💫💫❤️❤️✨✨🙏🙏

  • @patriciaavery9001
    @patriciaavery9001 4 месяца назад +1

    This is just SUCH a good video. Calm, measured, thoughtful, intelligent. Thank you. for making it. It is my first time seeing your channel.

  • @ringotan5244
    @ringotan5244 4 месяца назад +3

    Wow! At last, an overdue question and answer! 👌

  • @fatalframer87
    @fatalframer87 4 месяца назад +1

    Fantastic video. You really have to be honest with yourself whether children are for you or not. I'm 46 and all my life so far I was never once interested in children. If it doesn't interest you, don't do it. With lots of hobbies, as well as being a world traveler, I feel very fulfilled as a person with no children

  • @michaelamuro
    @michaelamuro 4 месяца назад +3

    We have same life perspective as yours. I support you. From Taiwan.

  • @mamaliping
    @mamaliping 4 месяца назад +1

    Brave and introspective sharing!!! And often a topic I deep think about. It's the same thing concept as being married or being single - no one is actually better than the other. We choose what we suits us and bring us the best in us. To me the worst is really just doing something because everyone is doing it. ❤❤❤

  • @chailatecookies7341
    @chailatecookies7341 20 дней назад

    You’re so beautiful and intelligent, you guys are lucky to have each other. God bless you both and your marriage. ❤❤❤

  • @simpleflylife8189
    @simpleflylife8189 4 месяца назад +2

    I am 47 and have always been child free. I now realize I missed a big blessing by choosing not to be a mom. Overall, I am very content with my decision and I wouldn't undo it. But as my friends are turning into grandparents, I realize I forfeited something huge in life. I wouldn't go back and do differently though. Just make sure you are clear about your why - why you have kids or why you don't. All the best to you and your hubby!

    • @nikiedewael3766
      @nikiedewael3766 4 месяца назад +3

      I think it is the fantasy you are craving now. Years ago when my colleges had (young) kids I was never jealous. I never wanted kids, the responsibility, cost, risks, no freedom. Now these colleges are becoming grandparents and that is a whole different dynamic. Sometimes I feel left out and that is a strange experience but still I can not say I want kids!

  • @anthis4297
    @anthis4297 4 месяца назад +6

    Wonderful video, thank you for sharing your thoughts ❤

  • @tubeEseen
    @tubeEseen 3 месяца назад +2

    Beautiful and intelligent couple❤

  • @dianeridgway8070
    @dianeridgway8070 Месяц назад

    Totally agree with everything you said. It is a personal choice. My husband and I are childfree and have been together for 27 years. We enjoy our freedom.

  • @migracion.la.gran.leccion
    @migracion.la.gran.leccion 3 месяца назад +1

    We felt the same way at the beginning. Then we decided to adopt. It is not easy, but we are so happy with our decision.

  • @Indeana
    @Indeana 27 дней назад

    "We should live it well"......❤️❤️

  • @jessiquilla1
    @jessiquilla1 4 месяца назад

    I fully admire you for living your truth and choosing the right path for you and your husband!! You said it all beautifully

  • @goodcatfilms4276
    @goodcatfilms4276 26 дней назад

    It’s hard to no if the pressure comes from external or internal forces on whether or not it’s wrong to not have kids… that’s what troubles me the most. Still childless at this point at the age of 32 it’s now a full time curiousity

  • @raysorayaray
    @raysorayaray 4 месяца назад +2

    You are free to chooce, always in your self by your self, norhing to do with others.
    Enjoy your life just thevway you are🎉🎉

  • @britniandben
    @britniandben 4 месяца назад

    Well said! We have the same mindset about this topic and we are very happy with our child free marriage/lifestyle. We love that our friends and family who have kids are enjoying their life as well! All about focusing on what true happiness looks like for each individual.
    Thank you for sharing these thoughts and points on this topic. Have a wonderful day!

  • @Childfree_Jerra
    @Childfree_Jerra 4 месяца назад +1

    Very well said! Your life isn't less valid because you chose not to have children. Also, being childfree is a very VALID, personal lifestyle choice. P.S. I love Bali, Indonesia & I love your channel! Much love and success to you and your husband!💜

  • @Fazevedoadv
    @Fazevedoadv 4 месяца назад +4

    I think that wanting kids is a feeling that comes with a person, such as liking banana or a pineapple. There are some that like one or another. The problem is that society make feeling wrong to not liking banana.

  • @thepainphantom
    @thepainphantom 8 дней назад

    You have a kind aura!

  • @monkeychops1585
    @monkeychops1585 4 месяца назад +1

    And who says your life or anyone else’s has to be meaningful anyway? It’s up to you. Having the courage to do it your way is the real test.

  • @СофьяЧемоданова-ы4я
    @СофьяЧемоданова-ы4я 4 месяца назад +1

    I was a childfree in my early twenties. There were times wnen I could say to a woman with kids: "I don't understand what's the reason of having a baby!" Now I'm in my late thirties and a mom of two teenagers. And I really can't believe that can produce such perfect human beings!!!😊 So proud of them❤ But I understand your feelings as a former child free. We sometimes just can't imagine how life may turn up. It's still a miracle for me.

    • @philippkrueger4410
      @philippkrueger4410 3 месяца назад +1

      Im currently living a childfree lifestyle and I am glad you are happy with your decision. Its a very difficult one to make for some and simply didn’t want to flip the coin just to find out if its a win or a loss.

  • @gabriela.castellanos
    @gabriela.castellanos 22 дня назад

    Thank you for this video 🙏🙏🙏

  • @LamNguyen-qb4ic
    @LamNguyen-qb4ic 3 месяца назад +2

    No kid is much better and give you lot of freedom to retire early. Enjoy your life and whatever make you and your man happy that's all matter. Good luck to you.

  • @wk.t2161
    @wk.t2161 Месяц назад

    I totally respect your choice to not have children. Absolutely nothing wrong with that. I have 8....and really really wanted them...and feel so blessed and have enjoyed them all.

  • @MN-wg8qd
    @MN-wg8qd 3 месяца назад +1

    Never was too interested in kids, but was open to it and we had twins without really 'trying' and its great. Its hard work, but brings a lot of joy. I am not trying to convince anyone of anything, I think that people should follow their hearts.
    I'm glad to have busted ass in my 20s and saved a lot before them. I can absolutely see how having kids really locks you in and kills plans. We are still going to retire/be FI in our 30s though which is the exception and are going to make our travel plans work too, but we will be restricted.
    I think that if people want them and FI then they need to make adjustments to make it all work. But I think its absolutely fine if you don't want them. I know its a common saying, but I find it true that YOUR KIDS are different. I know its bad to say, but I don't really give a fuck about other kids or my non-blood nieces/nephews, but I love the hell out of mine and love watching them learn and grow.

    • @JeanVoronkova
      @JeanVoronkova  3 месяца назад

      Thanks for this note I'm really glad you shared your view without making us feel pressure about our choices. I'm really in love with my furkids and they make me wonder if I should reconsider about children, but at the same time I feel like my cup is so full with the 2 of them and our family as it is already and everything is good as it is. It's wonderful that you have twins and you're so in love with them! And fab job with the FI for 4 😍👍

  • @TetyanaBurgers
    @TetyanaBurgers Месяц назад

    Mom of 2 here, expecting my third. Fully understand and agree with her point of view. I think the main reason people don't have kinds is just because they have a choice not to. Kids are hard work, they take away a lot from you - physically, mentally, financially, career wise etc.etc. The list goes on. Despite all of it, I'd still choose to have them over and over again, but that's just me, guess I'm just a sucker for pain 😂

  • @Lik3ToSing
    @Lik3ToSing Месяц назад

    I tried hard for my life. At 35, i ve experienced all things I wanted in life. It took me another 2 year to desire to have kid. I was worried that I might not able to have kid due to personal circumstances, age and health. The decision doesn’t come easy but I asked myself if there’s only one thing left in life I want to do, what is it? The answer is clear to me. It is also due to the fact that I feel full filled with myself at the age that I can still have my own kid. If i was 45-50, I might not have one

  • @lindajmorrison
    @lindajmorrison 4 месяца назад +8

    Parenting is incredible and never sucks balls ... It is truly the best thing I have ever done and I have achieved a good amount in my short years - The toughest thing has been empty nesting. DO not ever think otherwise. WE grow completely for and through them it is truly unexplainable to anyone whom have not stepped through this experience. Choices are fine. All our lives are valid. If we live full and well. We make our best choices and also children come to us even when we do not choose.

    • @andrewholly9129
      @andrewholly9129 4 месяца назад +4

      parenting NEVER sucks balls? as an empty nester, are you forgetting the early years when babies can cry nonstop and toddlers can tantrum for hours, fight sleep, whine/screech if they don't get what they want, and basically wreak havoc everywhere? not saying that your kids personally did those things, but they are common challenges to consider when deciding if you want to have kids.

    • @niasteadley
      @niasteadley 4 месяца назад +4

      In the thick of parenting with a 2.5 year old and I can assure you there is plenty of ball sucking times 😂 and even more wonderful ones

    • @lindajmorrison
      @lindajmorrison 4 месяца назад

      @@niasteadley toddlers are my fav… enjoy. Some teenagers can allow you to know you are really living. Especially the fiercely independent ones!

    • @tubeEseen
      @tubeEseen 3 месяца назад

      When you say it is unexplainable, I don't believe you. If not you, surely someone in the history of the world has found the words.

  • @martypoll
    @martypoll 4 месяца назад +2

    I never had kids. I never had the urge. I got a vasectomy at 40. That was a great decision. Fortunately I never got pressured about it. I’m 68 now. No regrets.
    Population decline is a real phenomenon though.

  • @vivxx5939
    @vivxx5939 3 месяца назад

    Jean I wish we could meet a couple like you guys to travel with us. I´m the same age as you and no kids either. Many other similarities too. xx

  • @bobmarker6812
    @bobmarker6812 Месяц назад

    I'm 63 and have known since I was 17 I didn't want kids. I like kids but didn't want the responsibility or expense. Retired at 57. Life is great. Alot of people my age have their adult kids living at home and are raising grand kids.

  • @zxia6096
    @zxia6096 4 месяца назад +2

    Thanks!

  • @ConsciousOriginals
    @ConsciousOriginals 4 месяца назад

    Thanks for sharing. I've never really wanted to have kids. Not my dharma. And I'm pretty happy to have never felt any pressure on that side. It's not a requirement. ;) I like your videos.

    • @philippkrueger4410
      @philippkrueger4410 3 месяца назад

      I wonder how many parents exist not because they wanted to be parents but because they were pressured into parenthood due to societal expectations and norms.

  • @sokkimly8182
    @sokkimly8182 3 месяца назад +1

    Can anyone notice about the landfill, there are mountains of trash around the world. It’s ok to have kids if you’re ready. But how many people out there ask themselves that one question.

  • @mindbodyhome102
    @mindbodyhome102 4 месяца назад +1

    No kids here and single woman in mid sixties....no regrets! In 9th grade biology we were shown a video of "natural" childbirth. All the other girls were saying how beautiful it was and I was screaming "that is the most horrifically disgusting thing I have ever seen!" I knew right then and there that I would never have kids! I was 13

  • @taberfrench
    @taberfrench 2 месяца назад +1

    I always knew kids were not for me from the time I was a kid myself. All my friends would babysit for money and I did it a few times and HATED it. Hard pass.

    • @JeanVoronkova
      @JeanVoronkova  2 месяца назад

      i think its prob smtg we shd affirm as we get older ... but i guess some people are consistent from an early age 😊

  • @edelweisskai
    @edelweisskai 4 месяца назад

    It’s different life, both are good, with kids without kids. I have kids, I always imagine no kids I would really enjoy, maybe even more

    • @philippkrueger4410
      @philippkrueger4410 3 месяца назад +1

      Both decisions are good if they are made for the right people. Childfree could also be horrible if your desire is to have a family etc, being a parent could also be horrible if you desire more freedom and didn’t want this lifestyle

  • @svetla1star
    @svetla1star 4 месяца назад

    Jean, I love your energy and your videos. Thank you!! Also, can I ask if you can recommend Bali locations with less tourists and good for surfing? You may have a video on that, but I am not sure. Thank you!

  • @tinycookie1704
    @tinycookie1704 4 месяца назад +6

    I have the exact same thoughts. My wife doesn't agree with me sometimes because she was born to be a people pleaser. She says we'll be happy after we have kids. I say we should have kids after we are happy with ourselves. I don't know, it's a struggle.

    • @shamekabenjamin8010
      @shamekabenjamin8010 4 месяца назад +3

      I’m sorry for your struggle with this decision. Having children is not really something one can compromise on.. you can either have them or not. So I hope that you both are able to make the best decision about what is right for the two of you. However, if you’re not already happy right now… then bringing a child into a marriage that is still seeking happiness would not be in either of your best interest in my humble opinion. I agree with you, happiness THEN children, not the reverse.

    • @beaulieuc8910
      @beaulieuc8910 3 месяца назад +1

      mismatch

  • @unsaltedbeurre3411
    @unsaltedbeurre3411 4 месяца назад +6

    Same here. I've never wanted kids, or to be more precise, I've never wanted to sign up to a profession called 'parent'. It's just the same as me never wanting to be a doctor, a pilot, a soldier, etc. because I know what those jobs entail and I know what being a parent entails and it's a big no for me. My partner, on the other hand, has adult children and he said parenting was easy and fun, only because he wanted it. So, like you said, it comes down to being honest to ourselves and taking responsibility for our own decisions. Unfortunately, too many humans have children when they actually don't really want to and shouldn't. That's why there are so many troubled humans out there. People often say to me it's selfish to not have kids. I always reply to them it's even more selfish to have kids when you aren't sure or don't want to but go ahead and have them anyway just because they're scared of not following the herd or scared of being alone in old age.

  • @rickforse8518
    @rickforse8518 29 дней назад

    Having, or not having, children has nothing to do with the man and his desires. It is ALL about wether or not the woman wants them. If she doesn't want children, it may happen anyway, but the marriage will not last. Count yourself lucky to have the beautiful marriage you do and leave any guilt you have about not procreating behind. No one really cares except you anyway.

  • @bordercollieluxi
    @bordercollieluxi 4 месяца назад

    I Love your honesty

  • @Fazevedoadv
    @Fazevedoadv 4 месяца назад +1

    I feel the same way ❤

  • @Mahachai66
    @Mahachai66 2 месяца назад

    Nice, congratulations!

  • @christyhilton1919
    @christyhilton1919 4 месяца назад +1

    Wealthy couples wouldn't go without kids. Also, i can't imagine, i dont have a kid of my darling husband good genes.

  • @daneastill2058
    @daneastill2058 19 дней назад

    Not having kids is definitely a fun easy life. More money, traveling, less stress. But looking down the road have u thought what the future holds. Maybe your spouse will die, how old will u live to, end up in a nursing home no one to visit you especially around the holidays. What about something around the house that needs fixing, cars, medicare when the time comes. Driving u places when u can't drive anymore. Seeing maybe your friends that are being called grandma or grandpa. The trips, money, vacations home will all be gone in the end but family that is forever

    • @mokakuma7329
      @mokakuma7329 13 дней назад

      its alright to stay alone, nursing home sounds great cuz people working there are trained for that, im not gonna bring a whole life just to take care of me when im older, also think bout it, life isn't worth it, i dont wanna bring a human, also human is quit evil, i dont like it

    • @misskiz786
      @misskiz786 10 дней назад +1

      have you noticed how everything you listed is centered around YOU? What if the child doesn't want to do those things? What if they move away and you're alone anyway? Having a child just so YOU won't be lonely in old age is pretty selfish...

    • @daneastill2058
      @daneastill2058 10 дней назад

      @misskiz786 the magic word "what if"

  • @mariejae
    @mariejae 3 месяца назад

    I'm 39. I want to live this life but need a better job or business.

  • @dionbrooks4981
    @dionbrooks4981 Месяц назад

    I never wanted to have kids or get married..i told my whole family this when i was 19 teen....now im 55 still no kids , but i did breakdown n meet the most important person in my life (best decision i ever made)...my WIFE.... Just got married two years ago ...She has no kids either at 53( her first marriage also)...all most, made it to the finish lane by myself ...But god had a different plan

  • @per_growth
    @per_growth 4 месяца назад +1

    Warren Beatty said "The good that God does is that He doesnt let people without children know what they are missing" - and I believe this applies to you.
    I have 2 wonderful adult children - and there is nothing I wouldn't do for them. But having children isn't the end all and be all of everything.
    Having children means you will give a substantial part of your life (and your relationship with your spouse) to the children. They will take up most of your energy, resources and time. I have several friends who never had children, either by choice or by chance, and they are just as happy as my wife and I.
    No one can judge you for your choice. Its your life. Live it the way you want to.

  • @nenyaallure2936
    @nenyaallure2936 4 месяца назад

    I looked at you and curious why you having a Russian surname and now it makes a lot of sense to me 🥰

    • @JeanVoronkova
      @JeanVoronkova  4 месяца назад

      oooh haha yeah it's my married name!

  • @pamayawat
    @pamayawat 4 месяца назад

    Deciding not to have children is everyons right. Saying it outloud is courageous, specially when you are Asian.
    Its also ironic that we can only see grateful parents.. it very rare to see parents saying they regret having their children, because it is unacceptable.
    Its a fact that life without children is more economical, and having one should not be required but a decision, like choosing a vocation.

    • @JeanVoronkova
      @JeanVoronkova  4 месяца назад

      lol your comment 😆. Very true. It's like stickin one's neck out for a public chopping. Like you said, kids or no kids are just different life paths. One can't experience everything in life so one must choose what suits best.

  • @mindcache5650
    @mindcache5650 Месяц назад

    Your choice. I have a strict boundary between kids and pets. They’re not the same.

  • @MichaelDuignan-p2c
    @MichaelDuignan-p2c 4 месяца назад +6

    It is obvious in society that not everyone Should have kids . Unfortunately for every thoughtful good person that chooses not to or can't there are several that show no parental qualities that do .

  • @Vitaliy-speciallyfor_KristinaH
    @Vitaliy-speciallyfor_KristinaH 3 месяца назад +2

    Я из России! Твой муж русский?

  • @SD._
    @SD._ 4 месяца назад +6

    Thank you for making this video. PS. Single and very happy. 😊

  • @marcuslucian763
    @marcuslucian763 Месяц назад

    Thanks, you have to be willing to have kids if not don’t make them.

  • @teachchildren5660
    @teachchildren5660 3 месяца назад +1

    My husband and I had 4 children and it was the grandest adventure of our lives! Love was multiplied with every child in a way I did not know I could love. We were intentional about creating a magical childhood and youth for them full of adventures and good memories. We were plenty happy before kids, but we were surprised with a new joy seeing the world through their eyes. It was amazing!! Some of our favorite memories are camping in the Rocky Mountains. We took them camping all over the country to many of the National Parks. They are all twenty somethings now, two are married, one grandchild and the fun is multiplied even more in our family gatherings. I highly recommend having children!!

    • @Isaidso-hz7kg
      @Isaidso-hz7kg 3 месяца назад +2

      Why do you highly recommend having children to people who don't want it? They made a whole video about that...

    • @reckonerwheel5336
      @reckonerwheel5336 3 месяца назад

      I'd be too poor to take my kids on any trips. We'd be going to McDonald's as a treat.

  • @life_ofmaria
    @life_ofmaria Месяц назад

    Now 32, have no kids and enjoying life .

  • @7SideWays
    @7SideWays Месяц назад

    We had our first of 2 at 30, married 5 years. We're glad we enjoyed our 20s, but also glad we have our boys. Legacy-wise, I don't know how the child-free do it.

  • @IvanaRock
    @IvanaRock Месяц назад

    So sad

  • @mariojane8188
    @mariojane8188 4 месяца назад +1

    Raising kids can be annoying !! Even having pets also.

  • @Nzee2002
    @Nzee2002 4 месяца назад +1

    There are 7 Billion people on the planet
    What new you will create ?
    So good decision, keep it up

  • @sadfasde3108
    @sadfasde3108 27 дней назад

    Parenting does not suck balls.

  • @2622Valerie1
    @2622Valerie1 4 месяца назад +103

    I do not have children. I am 48- 49 ( in August). I do not regret.. in contrary… ! Good luck

    • @asavannah7439
      @asavannah7439 4 месяца назад +9

      I am 46 and definitely also do not regret not having children.

    • @gogicbasic7629
      @gogicbasic7629 2 месяца назад +2

      You chose Life! Great choice girl! 👏

    • @berserk9564
      @berserk9564 Месяц назад

      Not sustainable way of life for humanity. Liberal and secularism indeed bring humanity into doom

  • @simpelminimalistischleven
    @simpelminimalistischleven 4 месяца назад +86

    People like to judge everything that is not standard. We have four children and that is regarded strange and selfish by many. Just as having none. You do you 🤍 People will always judge when you deviate fromthe norm whatever that may be. Our job is to not be bothered and live our own beautiful lives 🌸

    • @rod1424
      @rod1424 4 месяца назад +3

      4 is strange and selfish? Where you from?

    • @erikt1713
      @erikt1713 3 месяца назад +4

      ​@@rod1424Here in Switzerland it's the same. If you have more than two kids you are seen as promoting climate change.
      One thing is sure - if everyone globally had 4 kids it would be unsustainable. However, it balances nicely with the childfree.

    • @mylesleggette7520
      @mylesleggette7520 2 месяца назад +5

      People don't just judge nonstandard things, they judge EVERYthing. Finding your own self and peace with that is a journey universal to all humans.

  • @LordFlashheart1
    @LordFlashheart1 4 месяца назад +122

    Summed up perfectly, I never envisaged kids, I'm 46 now (man) I like a simple life, camper, motorbike, surf when I want, work minimally

    • @dr.gaosclassroom
      @dr.gaosclassroom Месяц назад +4

      Your life is wonderful. Have or not have children is such a personal thing!