Take back the right to be average My god, thank you for this. I'm on my quarter life crisis trying to find the most meaningful job and this talk has change my perception.
@M Depends on what you consider successful. Always push for more but don't necessarily expect it- you probably WON'T get it. If you can happy with the 'average' you can be happy with anything higher as well.
Damn, after watching so many "self-improvement" videos to "fight mediocrity", this comment section feels so surreal. It's almost like a Bizarro version of the comments sections of those videos. I feel so welcome here...
We are not born to serve the society. We have a responsibility to take care of the earth and not shy away from world affairs. But it is equally important to take care of ourselves as well. It is not possible to maintain the perfect equilibrium between being selfless and selfish.But it matters on what aspects are u considering to be either of them
@H Az What a lot of people don't understand is even the truly exceptional people we see every day are a product of diligent & consistent regular, normal, boring lives and routines.
"So, what do you do on a monday afternoon when you're home alone in your pj's?" *silence* Me: *looks around and raises hand slowly* Masturba- "Exactly! You check Facebook." Me: Yep. Mmhm. Me too. *turns to nearest audience member* He's right; that's what we do. That's what normal people do. mhmm. He gets us. Yep yep yep. Yeppity yep. mhmm. yep yes totally *nods in overzealous agreement*
Secret to being happy is stop being greedy, stop trying to be successful because all that propels you is a desire of wealth. I got rid of greed and wanting more and I'm so happy now.
My dad literally sent me a message about how I shouldn’t be mediocre. I can’t be average and proceeded to show me how my younger cousin, was above average and I should be like her. I wanna be normal.
“Rid ourselves of the fear of not being exceptional” “Not everything we do will be exceptional”. These are great quotes. Following these quotes helps you to move forward and take chances. Be happy with who you are, but.... you gotta learn WHO you are. You can’t do this if you don’t test yourself, if you don’t try new things. There can be a talent or skill you have inside you that your completely unaware of. Never stop learning about who you are and what your capable of.
In no way does this guy say to give up on your dreams...quite the contrary. He is saying what wise folks have been saying for thousands of years... "The Journey IS the Reward" ~Sun Tzu
Marcus Aurelius once wrote that you should treasure what you have, rather than lament what you don't, and not to wait until someone or something you love leaves your life before realising that you didn't take care of them or it.
Irene Huang Hmm my brother keeps bothering me for how little I make, that my college degree is useless, I'm a failure, burden to my mother, etc.. and I tell him "live and let die man". He wants me to be like him but I'm above that greed already, probably much happier than him too, because I don't need to belittle others and make them feel like garbage to feel better myself.
I don't need to do research to come to the conclusions Jeroen van Baar so eloquently explained. I was raised that way by my parents. They have given me and my two brothers these golden values. When I tell my collegues or friends, that I can experience happieness by just doing the laundry, they look at me if I am crazy. They have allready forgotten that feeling happy also can be in very tiny and ordinary things of every day life. I feel sorry for them. Bless my parents.
Adi Purnama because when you're too good at one thing, it probably means you're too bad at another. so being okay at a lot of things means you won't do too bad at others. my 2c
Brilliant stuff. Very well spoken. I personally feel that in today's day an age the focus on excessive progress and excessive motivation has driven us all up against the wall. Everyone is obsessed with reaching the top rung on the ladder of materialism. People are obsessed with outdoing themselves and reaching some esoteric standard they perceive will help them attain status in society.
I am here because at times I felt bad being a mediocre but then on, I realized man, it is ok (great!) to be just ok. Thank you for reminding me that it is ok to be average. I am good at almost everything that I do but I did not stand out at any of it. Atleast I am good at everything *wink*
Love this talk! I have been putting too much burden on myself for comparing with others and achieving excellency. But now i realize that there is merit to mediocrity.
In a very interesting way, this speaker hits upon something that can in fact propel one to better performance and further heights. The normal or usual approach is where an individual focuses on achievements or success causing enormous stress, performance anxiety, and frustration. It is very evident that this cannot result in better performance. Whereas "Accepting" Mediocrity just removes these pressures from the equation and allows every individual to focus on the process of doing - rather than focusing on the the end result of being "the best" or "having the best" in everything. Though counter-intuitive, the latter approach will actually yield better performance and results.
My manager has this attitude and its great. I remember having a period of stress where I was trying to be perfect at everything and she said just to aim for 'good enough'. That she is a 'good enough ' manager and 'good enough' at running etc and there is no need to be the best. Changed my perspective
@@noblenormie1179 Nah, a lot of people simply don't like the BS pressure to reach their "potential" so others will benefit. Even if somebody could reach great heights... why should they, if they aren't happy? Do what you want, you don't owe others anything... I owe you nothing, but you also owe me nothing. People are just tired of being brainwashed from early childhood into believing they owe "society" anything back... they don't.
Hooray for Paradigm Shifts! On a quest to live as stress free a life as possible, I''m in counseling for almost obsessive perfectionism stemming from childhood trauma and the accompanying need to be in control. My therapist was just talking to me about this very concept this morning; i was taken aback at first, then quickly embraced it. It just sounded like such a more loving way to be in the world! I felt so calm leaving her office, as if a big weight had been lifted, for it had! I'm giving myself--and others--more slack and less harsh judgment starting today!
The mystery in all this is that often contentment and love for who you are helps you see clearly what can be improved upon. Certain Improvements bring more satisfaction.
Great talk! I love when at 6:30, that girl in the audience looks at the guy next to her and gives him this look like the speaker had touched on something they had had an argument about or something.
Oh yes. We have been jolted into thinking of being exceptional that we forget to enjoy what we get in the process. Infact I look at the grass which is less green and thank heavens for giving me more than so many under privileged humans! The bigger the success, the bigger the trials and tribulations one faces to maintain it. Perhaps it's good for my heart to have less frequent jolts of too much success and too much associated dangers creating a constant spiral of stress!
It is true !! I remember when I first bought my Ps2 and only had 1-5 games it was great but when I got a chip and got maybe 70 or more games it became boring. I dont know why but I have never heard anyone give a word for it. Choice Overload =)
Ok... one problem I have with this, is something that's a problem with a lot of "smart people" who believe they know the world, but actually they project their own lifestyle onto the world. In other words, they think most people, or a lot of people, have a very similar mindframe as themselves. "Our society as a whole" and "our generation in particular" are terms that quite often misrepresent the predicate that follows. Young, rich, blonde, intelligent and spoiled people in Holland or the USA are not true representatives of "our generation". It is true that there are many aspects where "our society as a whole" can be labeled more accurately (or accurately enough). This "maximizers" thing is just another synonym of "overachievers", or you can use more negative adjectives as "greedy" or "megalomaniacal", egocentric, egoist, etc. (I'm not implying that overachievers are necessarily egocentric in the obnoxious, patronizing sense. But, you know...). The problem is, the "elite" is mostly comprised of these overachievers, maximizers, greedy, egocentric, narcissistic, etc. (I'm not hating "the elites", I'm just stating what is somewhat obvious), and there is a direct, overtly, undisguised pushing force towards making other people (the masses) become more competitive and strive for higher grounds. There is a blatant negative stance towards "laid back" people, they're lazy, they're losers, they're parasites. Virtue is being a hard worker, being very active within society, constantly improving whatever (since "improving" may be very subjective). There's aggressive marketing everywhere. You have to buy, you need to update your equipment. People may be bullied, ridiculed, for being too outdated. Not only that, but in many cases the person will get fired, get abandoned by "friends" or girlfriends or whatever. But this is a tendency, and like I said, it does come from "the top down", otherwise there would be no need for heavy marketing and extreme sales strategies and etc. Most people WILL live a somewhat "simple life", if not constantly bothered and pushed by others. Mediocrity is not something most need to "strive for"; unless, of course, it's the bottom of society, those who are the "trash", who then need to strive to keep up with the masses, make a lot of effort to be "average", these would be the extreme obese, the dwarfs, the mentally challenged, the deformed, the diseased, the ones with physical disabilities, etc. Now, somewhat contradicting what I just said... in a certain aspect, since most people in the world are more prone to "the simple life", what is considered "the average" is not really the norm for the majority, but an average between the top and the bottom. What I'm trying to say is that the "average" in terms of capitalist, economic parameters, is different than the average of cultural/behavioral characteristics of the majority of people. So then, everyone becomes "below average" (not everyone, but the majority of the masses). In other words (again) a "normal person" becomes "below average", simply because those at the top decided that the average MUST BE something above what the average really is. It's like I take a group of a hundred people, and give them a test, and most of them score about the same, let's say 6 out of 10, then I arbitrarily state that the average should be 7, and most people are now automatically below average. That's exactly how capitalism works. No one likes to be "below average", but since the definition of average is set by people in power (at least in these economic aspects, which are mostly the axis of all these social debates/speeches), the notion of average tend to be subjective and dynamic. I'm gonna stop writing because this comment is already too much above average of a normal RUclips comment!
"That's how capitalism works"? Actually it's more like this. Two consenting adults decide to enter into a transaction with each other then involves money and /or a good or service. They're both happy with the exchange because they both feel that they benefited from it and there is no cop with a jackboot and a billy club stopping them or telling them that they can't do it or dictating to them how to do it. THAT is how capitalism works!
@@tedmccarron I never got notifications from this reply. What you´re describing is simply the most basic and obvious structure of what makes "capitalism". What I am talking about are precisely "everything else" except for the basic BARTER that the concept of money come in to facilitate. Marketing, publicity, propaganda, the "news", tv shows, entertainment (celebrities), that´s all part of capitalism, and they do not affect "two consenting adults", they affect EVERYONE. Not to mention things like drugs, prostitution, trafficking of all kinds of things and substances and animals and people. This is all part of society, this is all part of capitalism, this is all transactions made with the use of money, with the use of "capital". The "good citizen", domesticates, suburban lifestyle middle-class American is not the only kind of people who play the "capitalist game".
@@CzechRiot well having politicians and control of the economy also affects everyone and usually in very negative, horrible ways. All we have to do is look to North Korea and the former Soviet Union for examples of this.
@@tedmccarron None of my comments are in any way presenting the subject in a dichotomic "capitalism vs. communism" way. Also, these alleged "socialist/communist" nations were all dictatorships disguised under a vague blanket of "socialism" or whatever. My original comment has nothing to do with those government models. I´m using the word "capitalism", but it wasn´t meant to be taken in these "Marxist" type of view, but mainly in the more "Darwinian sense" of natural competition amongst individuals (who are, clearly, not equals).
best presentation i've heard in the whole day i have been growing up under the full observation of my dad and he always wanted me to be the best so i always was trying to gain more and more but also it made me so alone and i don't have friends at all and also made me prefectionist but my mom one day said why you don't want to be average why you want to be exceptional and this made me thinking so much and i recommand you to mediocrity is okay
Omg! I loved it! This talks made me so comfortable now, i will now embrace being average because by achieving something great in my life i always end up feeling inferior all the time, i will be contented of what i've got now and i won't expect to much for my life just an AVERAGE haha it's AWESOME! Thank you.
Perfectionism.. and the Impostor Syndrome have paralyzed peoples, preventing them from simply take actions. Me too.. forever trapped in endless planning.. will otherwise soon go to my grave buried with my dreams. Tq for beautiful, deep insights Jeroen!!! Choice Overload Maximizers vs Satisficers Beautiful concepts i learnt today
I have only watched the 1st 4 minutes and I felt myself inspired to save my 90-sec video for a company, because you were sure in your explanation. Thanks for sharing. I wish you a chain of success in your goals!
Just Love it, thank you to the jeroen for making me so comfortable now. Everyday some of my friends doing great things. i really feel happy for my friends. But, i feel bad for myself for not archeiving and also being an average person. I won't really care about being an average. Because, AVERAGE is AWESOME. This TED Talk was Average......i mean Awesome........
Wow, this talk was AMAZING!! I agree with every single point! And the experiment with the chocolate is so true. I've been thinking the same thing about university applications. I have such a huge range of options that it gets harder and harder to choose the 'right' option. I struggle everyday at it, because I always think: "What if I choose the wrong thing?" It would be a lot easier, if someone just gave me 6 options and I'd have to choose from these! Good talk man, really good talk, I loved everything about it!! :)
These days it might not be up to you to be just ok. The economic state is very bad at the moment (at least in my country), so it's very difficult to even get a job. And if you're not exceptional, qualified and have a lot of experience, it's more than likely that you won't get that job, because there always will be someone who is better than you.
aDotFromTheFuture you are right, but at least you won't feel the need to be exceptional in every aspect of your life, just the one that requires you to be so, like your career
Jobs... it's like you need to be exceptional to earn something average. I don't have a job. I live off legal loopholes and the cracks of society. When the game is rigged, the only way to win is to hack it.
Hopefully, in the 4 years that have passed, you've gained a new perspective on life. Success is inherently not something you can measure. Personally, I feel success is the journey toward self-mastery. We should all strive to be well-rounded emotionally, mentally, spiritually, financially, in our health, and out purpose - not propelling one or some at the expense of others. Do what makes you feel fulfilled and if that's just good ol' living, free of the egotistical pursuit of a standard sometimes just to fuel a hedonistic lifestyle, then do that. On our death beds, what matters isn't those standard society set, but how fulfilled we were by how we lived the game called life.
I feel it`s improtant to know which areas to be a maximizer and which areas to be a satisficer. For example, finding a partner or career might not be about settling for "mediocrity". Still we have a tendency to not appreciate what we already have.
my hero! everything about me is average and/or mediocre. I love it. I am a success! I am content.choice overload,is like waiting on your computer to stop loading, but it or never does. I mean every word you said. I am 66 years old. how old are you? you are perceptive.
Mediocrity is probably not the apt word. Living a mediocre life is not the same as living simply, with your own set of priorities apart from the crowd. My advice to everyone: avoid Facebook and what other people are doing and pursue your own excellence.
What he is talking about is a society that is a product of neoliberal capitalism. Capitalism doesn’t want you to be satisfied it lives of creating unnecessary needs. It tells you to compete with others because it lives of competition.
It's not too bad to be ordinary. The goal of life is simply to live. Our lives in this Earth is temporary. Why not focus on doing something you love that can contribute to society even is smallest act? It doesn't have to be so remarkable..
It would be kinda funny if the next generation did a 180 flip and pursued mediocrity like crazy while neglecting perfection. (but then again, society in general kind of works that way already). Regarding the video, this talk was basically what i had in my mind for a long time. Chasing dreams is not viable if you set the bar too high. There's so many people freaking out about mediocrity when it's an unavoidable part of every ones life, even among the most exceptional beings.
I’m a little tight because I looked up ‘the beauty of mediocrity’ to make sure I was the one who came up with the idea and then this video comes up😪great video though very well said even though you stole my whole idea😘
One has more choices than "to be just ok... to be average" or "to be better" ... those "options" are the same thing when one is not being oneself. This guy is missing the point by saying that there is merit to mediocrity.
You see, everybody expects you to be more than average. Have you ever thought, what is wrong with being average? No, I am not trying to go onto r/iam14andthisisdeep, I am genuinely asking you a question. Is it really that bad being a regular person? I don't mean weak or lazy, I mean being a normal functioning member of society, who you might ignore when you see them on the street?
An interesting video. Although I disagree with a lot of it. It's true that our generation has more freedom than a medieval peasant, but 'more freedom' is not freedom. The cage is bigger, but it's still a cage. I'm aware that there are people out there who see careers and cars as things that bring value, but that's a choice you make to accept the values of everyone else. To be honest that's fetishing the letzermensche. Freedom is the ability to chose your own values, but also to chose your oppression, to have the choice of being able to exist independent of capitalism or communism or nazism or any other ism. To have no ism - to have no cage - except the one that works for you. That's why being alive is so depressing. We haven't escaped the fanatical obsession with authority and power that was so prevalent to the lives of the medieval peasant. The only difference is they used the idea of God to mask it. Today you've got other things that mask it. And what it shrinks is not that the cage is bigger. No, the cage is shrinking. Choice is not freedom if all you can chose is meaningless rubbish. In summary you're not average. You decide what is average and what is good. Don't accept dictatorship from the masses or from some corporate exec. Do what's right for you.
Great video but the title is wrong. "Average is Awesome: Embracing Mediocrity as the Key to Happiness" could be better, I suppose." Anyway, I am really happy to see this video.
The majority of Deviant Art gonna love this video. Since mediocrities are celebrated there. It's important to be simple than being right, reasonable, good, true, competitive or better.
Remember, it's all arbitrary and conventional, we invented the high and low status, mediocre, average, all of it, don't sweat it too much if you don't meet your psychological creations
The only thing I ever desired to be, my only lifelong dream, was to be a well-known, skilled cartoonist. (At the very least, a skilled one.) I don't see myself ever settling for anything less. Without the hope of improvement, I have no motivation to work on skills. Or, for that matter, to draw at all. EDIT: I don't know why other people want to reach the top, but I know why I do. Mediocrity is embarrassing. Look at the folks who sing horribly on shows such as American Idol--they're bombarded with ridicule, scorn and downright hatred. The sitcom character who can't sing, dance, write or whatever it is they aspire to do gets howls of laughter from the audience. Who needs that?
Really well said, “And now that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good.”
and in the case where I'm already perfect ? '
@@baguettelauncher8839 lol good luck
@@baguettelauncher8839 👍
@@baguettelauncher8839 🤦♂️💀
Take back the right to be average
My god, thank you for this. I'm on my quarter life crisis trying to find the most meaningful job and this talk has change my perception.
@M Depends on what you consider successful. Always push for more but don't necessarily expect it- you probably WON'T get it. If you can happy with the 'average' you can be happy with anything higher as well.
Damn, after watching so many "self-improvement" videos to "fight mediocrity", this comment section feels so surreal. It's almost like a Bizarro version of the comments sections of those videos.
I feel so welcome here...
I felt the same bro
Going by the backwards law doesn’t fighting mediocrity actually make you more mediocre?
Happiness and satisfaction with ourselves way more important than being excellence in every single aspect of life. It's OK to be just OK.
We are not born to serve the society.
We have a responsibility to take care of the earth and not shy away from world affairs. But it is equally important to take care of ourselves as well. It is not possible to maintain the perfect equilibrium between being selfless and selfish.But it matters on what aspects are u considering to be either of them
@H Az What a lot of people don't understand is even the truly exceptional people we see every day are a product of diligent & consistent regular, normal, boring lives and routines.
"So, what do you do on a monday afternoon when you're home alone in your pj's?"
*silence*
Me: *looks around and raises hand slowly* Masturba-
"Exactly! You check Facebook."
Me: Yep. Mmhm. Me too. *turns to nearest audience member* He's right; that's what we do. That's what normal people do. mhmm. He gets us. Yep yep yep. Yeppity yep. mhmm. yep yes totally *nods in overzealous agreement*
lel
Sam Lockhart ahhhhhhhh that was the greatest comment I’ve read this week! Hilarious!! 😂 thank you for the laughs!
😆
🤣🤣🤣
That's the joke
“The woods would be quiet if no bird sang but the one that sang best.”
― Henry Van Dyke
So true! Tq for the quote..
Secret to being happy is stop being greedy, stop trying to be successful because all that propels you is a desire of wealth. I got rid of greed and wanting more and I'm so happy now.
saganist but money drives ambition.. most of the time
This was a great TED talk. I was actually looking for something like this. Our generation should have the right to be average.
My dad literally sent me a message about how I shouldn’t be mediocre. I can’t be average and proceeded to show me how my younger cousin, was above average and I should be like her. I wanna be normal.
@@hsmacaraig if you wanna be a normal then stay normal but always try to enjoy journey even if you are striving for best or not
Yeah not every woman wants to be a boss b;t
“Rid ourselves of the fear of not being exceptional” “Not everything we do will be exceptional”. These are great quotes. Following these quotes helps you to move forward and take chances. Be happy with who you are, but.... you gotta learn WHO you are. You can’t do this if you don’t test yourself, if you don’t try new things. There can be a talent or skill you have inside you that your completely unaware of. Never stop learning about who you are and what your capable of.
In no way does this guy say to give up on your dreams...quite the contrary.
He is saying what wise folks have been saying for thousands of years...
"The Journey IS the Reward" ~Sun Tzu
Marcus Aurelius once wrote that you should treasure what you have, rather than lament what you don't, and not to wait until someone or something you love leaves your life before realising that you didn't take care of them or it.
Says the guy sun tzu who wasn’t mediocre lol
@@redlemur7944 boo
@@redlemur7944
Tbf, he wrote a self help book and that's about it
@@bananian That's about it? What about his battles
My sister is a maximizer and I am a satisfier.She makes much more money but I am happier and satisfied.Thank you for sharing this talk.
satisficer
Good for you Irene. That is the secret to a very good life
Irene Huang Hmm my brother keeps bothering me for how little I make, that my college degree is useless, I'm a failure, burden to my mother, etc.. and I tell him "live and let die man". He wants me to be like him but I'm above that greed already, probably much happier than him too, because I don't need to belittle others and make them feel like garbage to feel better myself.
That's good. Your coping is very inspirational.
cope
I don't need to do research to come to the conclusions Jeroen van Baar so eloquently explained. I was raised that way by my parents. They have given me and my two brothers these golden values. When I tell my collegues or friends, that I can experience happieness by just doing the laundry, they look at me if I am crazy. They have allready forgotten that feeling happy also can be in very tiny and ordinary things of every day life. I feel sorry for them.
Bless my parents.
Biology produces more average beings because average is generally best.
mind blown
Charles Ashurst Now i'm interested on your statement...
could you explain... why (?)
Adi Purnama because when you're too good at one thing, it probably means you're too bad at another. so being okay at a lot of things means you won't do too bad at others. my 2c
fernandez that makes no sense
Rxnys Makes perfect sense to me.
Most lives are average, normal and ordinary. Even the exceptional ones.
Brilliant stuff. Very well spoken. I personally feel that in today's day an age the focus on excessive progress and excessive motivation has driven us all up against the wall. Everyone is obsessed with reaching the top rung on the ladder of materialism. People are obsessed with outdoing themselves and reaching some esoteric standard they perceive will help them attain status in society.
I am here because at times I felt bad being a mediocre but then on, I realized man, it is ok (great!) to be just ok. Thank you for reminding me that it is ok to be average. I am good at almost everything that I do but I did not stand out at any of it. Atleast I am good at everything *wink*
glad you got that confidence
Love this talk! I have been putting too much burden on myself for comparing with others and achieving excellency. But now i realize that there is merit to mediocrity.
In a very interesting way, this speaker hits upon something that can in fact propel one to better performance and further heights.
The normal or usual approach is where an individual focuses on achievements or success causing enormous stress, performance anxiety, and frustration. It is very evident that this cannot result in better performance.
Whereas "Accepting" Mediocrity just removes these pressures from the equation and allows every individual to focus on the process of doing - rather than focusing on the the end result of being "the best" or "having the best" in everything.
Though counter-intuitive, the latter approach will actually yield better performance and results.
Exactly. So many people rn wasting time thinking about doing something perfectly instead of just doing it.
My manager has this attitude and its great. I remember having a period of stress where I was trying to be perfect at everything and she said just to aim for 'good enough'. That she is a 'good enough ' manager and 'good enough' at running etc and there is no need to be the best. Changed my perspective
This is no doubt the 10 best speech on TED Talk in my opinion.
ironically this is one of the best talks i've watched on this channel
Before this ideology I am below average and unhappy. After this ideology I am average but happy!
One could say you are not late or early. But precisly on time in your life.
Its about gratitude for where we are now and what we have. = genuine happiness
The maximizing thing applies to finding a significant other as well!
wow i thought i would hate this talk based on this title but it was actually great.
Exceptional people would not agree with this video - I am not one of them however. So, I loved it :)
FLATLINER I would never agree with it
@FLATLINER, And...What are you suggesting here? A deductive argument with the conclusion that you are exceptional?
Doc's World this is ridiculous
You normies have reached a point where you literally insult smart people wtf is this
Rxnys my comment was over a year ago and I don’t even remember the context anymore. Have a fun day :)
@@noblenormie1179 Nah, a lot of people simply don't like the BS pressure to reach their "potential" so others will benefit. Even if somebody could reach great heights... why should they, if they aren't happy? Do what you want, you don't owe others anything... I owe you nothing, but you also owe me nothing. People are just tired of being brainwashed from early childhood into believing they owe "society" anything back... they don't.
Hooray for Paradigm Shifts! On a quest to live as stress free a life as possible, I''m in counseling for almost obsessive perfectionism stemming from childhood trauma and the accompanying need to be in control. My therapist was just talking to me about this very concept this morning; i was taken aback at first, then quickly embraced it. It just sounded like such a more loving way to be in the world! I felt so calm leaving her office, as if a big weight had been lifted, for it had! I'm giving myself--and others--more slack and less harsh judgment starting today!
The mystery in all this is that often contentment and love for who you are helps you see clearly what can be improved upon. Certain Improvements bring more satisfaction.
This TED Talk is awesome!
Great talk! I love when at 6:30, that girl in the audience looks at the guy next to her and gives him this look like the speaker had touched on something they had had an argument about or something.
You imagine too much.
lool
Done ! This is the first TED that I have been able to master and I did it instantly . I will always be grateful to Jeroen .
Oh yes. We have been jolted into thinking of being exceptional that we forget to enjoy what we get in the process. Infact I look at the grass which is less green and thank heavens for giving me more than so many under privileged humans!
The bigger the success, the bigger the trials and tribulations one faces to maintain it. Perhaps it's good for my heart to have less frequent jolts of too much success and too much associated dangers creating a constant spiral of stress!
It is true !! I remember when I first bought my Ps2 and only had 1-5 games it was great but when I got a chip and got maybe 70 or more games it became boring. I dont know why but I have never heard anyone give a word for it. Choice Overload =)
Ok... one problem I have with this, is something that's a problem with a lot of "smart people" who believe they know the world, but actually they project their own lifestyle onto the world. In other words, they think most people, or a lot of people, have a very similar mindframe as themselves. "Our society as a whole" and "our generation in particular" are terms that quite often misrepresent the predicate that follows. Young, rich, blonde, intelligent and spoiled people in Holland or the USA are not true representatives of "our generation". It is true that there are many aspects where "our society as a whole" can be labeled more accurately (or accurately enough). This "maximizers" thing is just another synonym of "overachievers", or you can use more negative adjectives as "greedy" or "megalomaniacal", egocentric, egoist, etc. (I'm not implying that overachievers are necessarily egocentric in the obnoxious, patronizing sense. But, you know...). The problem is, the "elite" is mostly comprised of these overachievers, maximizers, greedy, egocentric, narcissistic, etc. (I'm not hating "the elites", I'm just stating what is somewhat obvious), and there is a direct, overtly, undisguised pushing force towards making other people (the masses) become more competitive and strive for higher grounds. There is a blatant negative stance towards "laid back" people, they're lazy, they're losers, they're parasites. Virtue is being a hard worker, being very active within society, constantly improving whatever (since "improving" may be very subjective). There's aggressive marketing everywhere. You have to buy, you need to update your equipment. People may be bullied, ridiculed, for being too outdated. Not only that, but in many cases the person will get fired, get abandoned by "friends" or girlfriends or whatever. But this is a tendency, and like I said, it does come from "the top down", otherwise there would be no need for heavy marketing and extreme sales strategies and etc. Most people WILL live a somewhat "simple life", if not constantly bothered and pushed by others. Mediocrity is not something most need to "strive for"; unless, of course, it's the bottom of society, those who are the "trash", who then need to strive to keep up with the masses, make a lot of effort to be "average", these would be the extreme obese, the dwarfs, the mentally challenged, the deformed, the diseased, the ones with physical disabilities, etc. Now, somewhat contradicting what I just said... in a certain aspect, since most people in the world are more prone to "the simple life", what is considered "the average" is not really the norm for the majority, but an average between the top and the bottom. What I'm trying to say is that the "average" in terms of capitalist, economic parameters, is different than the average of cultural/behavioral characteristics of the majority of people. So then, everyone becomes "below average" (not everyone, but the majority of the masses). In other words (again) a "normal person" becomes "below average", simply because those at the top decided that the average MUST BE something above what the average really is. It's like I take a group of a hundred people, and give them a test, and most of them score about the same, let's say 6 out of 10, then I arbitrarily state that the average should be 7, and most people are now automatically below average. That's exactly how capitalism works. No one likes to be "below average", but since the definition of average is set by people in power (at least in these economic aspects, which are mostly the axis of all these social debates/speeches), the notion of average tend to be subjective and dynamic. I'm gonna stop writing because this comment is already too much above average of a normal RUclips comment!
"That's how capitalism works"? Actually it's more like this. Two consenting adults decide to enter into a transaction with each other then involves money and /or a good or service. They're both happy with the exchange because they both feel that they benefited from it and there is no cop with a jackboot and a billy club stopping them or telling them that they can't do it or dictating to them how to do it. THAT is how capitalism works!
tedmccarron
Some people don’t get satisfaction from it, capitalism isn’t for everyone.
@@tedmccarron I never got notifications from this reply. What you´re describing is simply the most basic and obvious structure of what makes "capitalism". What I am talking about are precisely "everything else" except for the basic BARTER that the concept of money come in to facilitate. Marketing, publicity, propaganda, the "news", tv shows, entertainment (celebrities), that´s all part of capitalism, and they do not affect "two consenting adults", they affect EVERYONE. Not to mention things like drugs, prostitution, trafficking of all kinds of things and substances and animals and people. This is all part of society, this is all part of capitalism, this is all transactions made with the use of money, with the use of "capital". The "good citizen", domesticates, suburban lifestyle middle-class American is not the only kind of people who play the "capitalist game".
@@CzechRiot well having politicians and control of the economy also affects everyone and usually in very negative, horrible ways. All we have to do is look to North Korea and the former Soviet Union for examples of this.
@@tedmccarron None of my comments are in any way presenting the subject in a dichotomic "capitalism vs. communism" way. Also, these alleged "socialist/communist" nations were all dictatorships disguised under a vague blanket of "socialism" or whatever. My original comment has nothing to do with those government models. I´m using the word "capitalism", but it wasn´t meant to be taken in these "Marxist" type of view, but mainly in the more "Darwinian sense" of natural competition amongst individuals (who are, clearly, not equals).
I love how I went from Todd Rose’s TED Talk about the myth of average to Jereon Van Baar talking about how awesome it is to be average.
This is such an inspiring talk, sometimes we have to lower our expectations to be truly happy!
best presentation i've heard in the whole day i have been growing up under the full observation of my dad and he always wanted me to be the best so i always was trying to gain more and more but also it made me so alone and i don't have friends at all and also made me prefectionist
but my mom one day said why you don't want to be average why you want to be exceptional
and this made me thinking so much and i recommand you to mediocrity is okay
Omg! I loved it! This talks made me so comfortable now, i will now embrace being average because by achieving something great in my life i always end up feeling inferior all the time, i will be contented of what i've got now and i won't expect to much for my life just an AVERAGE haha it's AWESOME! Thank you.
Perfectionism.. and the Impostor Syndrome have paralyzed peoples, preventing them from simply take actions.
Me too.. forever trapped in endless planning.. will otherwise soon go to my grave buried with my dreams.
Tq for beautiful, deep insights Jeroen!!!
Choice Overload
Maximizers vs Satisficers
Beautiful concepts i learnt today
I have only watched the 1st 4 minutes and I felt myself inspired to save my 90-sec video for a company, because you were sure in your explanation. Thanks for sharing. I wish you a chain of success in your goals!
Just Love it, thank you to the jeroen for making me so comfortable now.
Everyday some of my friends doing great things. i really feel happy for my friends.
But, i feel bad for myself for not archeiving and also being an average person.
I won't really care about being an average.
Because, AVERAGE is AWESOME.
This TED Talk was Average......i mean Awesome........
Im gonna watch this once a day
I’m average and I’m ok with that I have a roof over my head I have a job and retirement
If that's you in the thumbnail then you are not average because most people don't have doge as their day to day pet.
M M but it’s not Doge
Yes me too
@@Kaledrone 😂
@@Kaledrone lol
Wow, this talk was AMAZING!! I agree with every single point!
And the experiment with the chocolate is so true. I've been thinking the same thing about university applications. I have such a huge range of options that it gets harder and harder to choose the 'right' option. I struggle everyday at it, because I always think: "What if I choose the wrong thing?" It would be a lot easier, if someone just gave me 6 options and I'd have to choose from these!
Good talk man, really good talk, I loved everything about it!! :)
These days it might not be up to you to be just ok. The economic state is very bad at the moment (at least in my country), so it's very difficult to even get a job. And if you're not exceptional, qualified and have a lot of experience, it's more than likely that you won't get that job, because there always will be someone who is better than you.
aDotFromTheFuture you are right, but at least you won't feel the need to be exceptional in every aspect of your life, just the one that requires you to be so, like your career
Jobs... it's like you need to be exceptional to earn something average. I don't have a job. I live off legal loopholes and the cracks of society. When the game is rigged, the only way to win is to hack it.
Which country are we talking about?
Then they would be too expensive to hire
Wow!!! Thank you, I understand fully your point!!
Bedankt Jeroen. Je geeft wat hele goede inzichten.
This was an AWESOME talk, not just an average one
a great talk, amazing!
I'm feeling soo good after watching this video. Thanks a ton!
Now I understand why Shikamaru Nara from Naruto always wanted a average life.
Average is Awesome.
nice talk, one of the best ones i've seen
The maximizers in these comments desperately defending their way of life are hilarious.
Hopefully, in the 4 years that have passed, you've gained a new perspective on life. Success is inherently not something you can measure. Personally, I feel success is the journey toward self-mastery. We should all strive to be well-rounded emotionally, mentally, spiritually, financially, in our health, and out purpose - not propelling one or some at the expense of others. Do what makes you feel fulfilled and if that's just good ol' living, free of the egotistical pursuit of a standard sometimes just to fuel a hedonistic lifestyle, then do that.
On our death beds, what matters isn't those standard society set, but how fulfilled we were by how we lived the game called life.
I feel it`s improtant to know which areas to be a maximizer and which areas to be a satisficer. For example, finding a partner or career might not be about settling for "mediocrity". Still we have a tendency to not appreciate what we already have.
something i needed to hear especially since i got into med school. thank you :)
It’s okay to be average with meaningful connections. It’s okay to be above average with contributing to something your passionate about
my hero! everything about me is average and/or mediocre. I love it. I am a success! I am content.choice overload,is like waiting on your computer to stop loading, but it or never does. I mean every word you said. I am 66 years old. how old are you? you are perceptive.
the hedonic treadmill first requires recognition and then education.
i Cant Wait.
Great speech, great talk
fantastic and simply pointing out what's right under ones nose in daily routine
The title is good enough for me.. thank you
Mediocrity is probably not the apt word. Living a mediocre life is not the same as living simply, with your own set of priorities apart from the crowd. My advice to everyone: avoid Facebook and what other people are doing and pursue your own excellence.
What he is talking about is a society that is a product of neoliberal capitalism.
Capitalism doesn’t want you to be satisfied it lives of creating unnecessary needs. It tells you to compete with others because it lives of competition.
Sorry, if you are average in this economy, you will be eaten, this is the message that I consistently get in my life here in the US.
This Ted Talk was, " Mmm... Average."
and that's perfectly fine.
Yay
you are so funny
Yea it was ok
Brilliant presentation, you absolutely nailed it for me.
Thank you
So true!
Great talk!
Love it. Simple and nice. Thank you!)
Love it!. Well said. Thank you.
It's not too bad to be ordinary. The goal of life is simply to live. Our lives in this Earth is temporary. Why not focus on doing something you love that can contribute to society even is smallest act? It doesn't have to be so remarkable..
Hidden gem of TED talks, youtube please wake up...
the vid just came in time ，THANKS A LOT
Amazing..This is new to me
It would be kinda funny if the next generation did a 180 flip and pursued mediocrity like crazy while neglecting perfection.
(but then again, society in general kind of works that way already).
Regarding the video, this talk was basically what i had in my mind for a long time.
Chasing dreams is not viable if you set the bar too high. There's so many people freaking out about mediocrity when it's an unavoidable part of every ones life, even among the most exceptional beings.
I’m a little tight because I looked up ‘the beauty of mediocrity’ to make sure I was the one who came up with the idea and then this video comes up😪great video though very well said even though you stole my whole idea😘
Ok literally no one as-
Excellent, excellent video, oh I mean average😀
Well said!
You know, that moment in recovery when you still aren't ok at all... but are somehow ok with that fact?
That moment when you struggle to even be everage or normal..
0:53
this guy has some SERIOUS patience
"You check facebook, right?" just when I was checking facebook
One has more choices than "to be just ok... to be average" or "to be better" ... those "options" are the same thing when one is not being oneself. This guy is missing the point by saying that there is merit to mediocrity.
You see, everybody expects you to be more than average.
Have you ever thought, what is wrong with being average?
No, I am not trying to go onto r/iam14andthisisdeep, I am genuinely asking you a question.
Is it really that bad being a regular person?
I don't mean weak or lazy, I mean being a normal functioning member of society, who you might ignore when you see them on the street?
Great topic thank you
can i still be mediocre in 2019?
Thinking the same
i'm in 2021
Awesome video and teaching. (:
There is merit to mediocrity.
Maybe you can't do any better than average. You're not choosing to be average, you're choosing to give up.
AWESOME INFORMATION AND VIDEO,THANKS. Great.
An interesting video. Although I disagree with a lot of it. It's true that our generation has more freedom than a medieval peasant, but 'more freedom' is not freedom. The cage is bigger, but it's still a cage. I'm aware that there are people out there who see careers and cars as things that bring value, but that's a choice you make to accept the values of everyone else. To be honest that's fetishing the letzermensche. Freedom is the ability to chose your own values, but also to chose your oppression, to have the choice of being able to exist independent of capitalism or communism or nazism or any other ism. To have no ism - to have no cage - except the one that works for you. That's why being alive is so depressing. We haven't escaped the fanatical obsession with authority and power that was so prevalent to the lives of the medieval peasant. The only difference is they used the idea of God to mask it. Today you've got other things that mask it. And what it shrinks is not that the cage is bigger. No, the cage is shrinking. Choice is not freedom if all you can chose is meaningless rubbish. In summary you're not average. You decide what is average and what is good. Don't accept dictatorship from the masses or from some corporate exec. Do what's right for you.
Great video but the title is wrong. "Average is Awesome: Embracing Mediocrity as the Key to Happiness" could be better, I suppose." Anyway, I am really happy to see this video.
What you do on a Monday afternoon when you are all alone? "I don't think this is the platform where I would be willing to confess it!"
The majority of Deviant Art gonna love this video. Since mediocrities are celebrated there. It's important to be simple than being right, reasonable, good, true, competitive or better.
Wow amazing talk
Remember, it's all arbitrary and conventional, we invented the high and low status, mediocre, average, all of it, don't sweat it too much if you don't meet your psychological creations
The only thing I ever desired to be, my only lifelong dream, was to be a well-known, skilled cartoonist. (At the very least, a skilled one.) I don't see myself ever settling for anything less. Without the hope of improvement, I have no motivation to work on skills. Or, for that matter, to draw at all.
EDIT: I don't know why other people want to reach the top, but I know why I do. Mediocrity is embarrassing. Look at the folks who sing horribly on shows such as American Idol--they're bombarded with ridicule, scorn and downright hatred. The sitcom character who can't sing, dance, write or whatever it is they aspire to do gets howls of laughter from the audience. Who needs that?
"Boss, I'm going to be mediocre. Hope you're ok with that."
Thank you for an average talk.