You Deserve To Be Loved & Chosen, Not Almost Loved Or Almost Chosen | In Your Feelings, Ep. 47

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  • Опубликовано: 23 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 107

  • @ohlamaria697
    @ohlamaria697 2 года назад +92

    I've noticed that so many people are desperate to find real love. Everything she said here is true. But also, check on yourself, do the hard work of truly searching what makes you like the people you like. Work on yourself so hard that you know your value not because you are hot but because you broke the cycle and did the work you needed to do. Because you are capable of being by yourself. Look for the trauma, look for the shadow part of yourself.
    There is no point in judging how others treat us if we are not willing to search inside. Take responsibility too.
    Please don't think "finding the right person" will change your life or it will make you happy.
    Put your expectations on yourself, in how you live your life, and stop caring about other people's life (including those who look like they have a perfect life).
    Focus on being thankful for the many forms of love you experience daily. Do not waste time holding grudges because a relationship didn't go the way you wanted, don't blame yourself or other people. You got to love the process, not only the goals.
    There is love out there for you.

    • @thoughtcatalog
      @thoughtcatalog  2 года назад +10

      Love this!! Pour into yourself first so others can know what kind of love your heart accepts 💕

    • @lazyoverthinker7194
      @lazyoverthinker7194 Год назад +5

      Thank you. Yesterday, I chose to let go someone who isn't choosing me. I finally chose myself.

    • @ohlamaria697
      @ohlamaria697 Год назад +5

      @@lazyoverthinker7194 you will never regret choosing yourself. I promise

    • @lazyoverthinker7194
      @lazyoverthinker7194 Год назад +2

      @@ohlamaria697 aww thanks so much for your reply. Means a lot as I'm still trying to move on from this. 🤍

  • @brittanyisabelle2095
    @brittanyisabelle2095 10 месяцев назад +10

    "You deserve to be loved and chosen..not Almost loved or Almost chosen" THat is ssoo truee .this explainns so much of me always feeling the ALMOST and not being worthy.

  • @jacquelineellis7136
    @jacquelineellis7136 8 месяцев назад +2

    😮What wonderful words. Five minutes in and I said this is for me. Thank you sweet lady!!❤ At 72, hopeful is a good exercise.

  • @elizabethjordan4937
    @elizabethjordan4937 2 года назад +72

    My heart is so broken.....I broke my own heart cause I knew he didn't want a relationship he just wanted the benefits..I fooled myself into thinking I could handle it cause I loved him and maybe he would eventually love me back......he died about two weeks ago and now I feel broken and lost......💔💔💔💔

    • @Megan6772
      @Megan6772 Год назад +9

      A lot of us have been there. Forgive yourself. Hope you're doing well now ❤️

    • @judhii5672
      @judhii5672 Год назад +3

      Hi can I ask how you moved on….

    • @niarobinson9757
      @niarobinson9757 10 месяцев назад +5

      I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending you so much healing, love, and hope ❤

    • @margueritedrya9807
      @margueritedrya9807 2 месяца назад +1

      Sending you much peace and love❤Going through a difficult time as well, I know what grief feels like, love you!! Love yourself and take care of yourself, you did everything right ❤

    • @elizabethjordan4937
      @elizabethjordan4937 2 месяца назад

      @@margueritedrya9807 thank you! I needed that! Thank you so much !Sending you love as well!! Love you! We got this!!❤️

  • @kimxx8797
    @kimxx8797 10 месяцев назад +4

    Your words changed my perspective. Now you have a dedicated listener. Thank you. I’m not crazy crying. I’m not upset. I’m looking at it differently where if I let go and don’t put in all this effort, maybe someone meant for me will come for me. I’m dealing with not even getting bare minimum. I deserve better. Making room for something i deserve.

  • @Iwillsurvive95
    @Iwillsurvive95 7 дней назад

    I love the hope this woman has. I hope she never dates a narcissist and becomes like the rest of us

  • @phillipmorgan-h2g
    @phillipmorgan-h2g 5 месяцев назад +2

    The love you describe is the love I have the capacity to give a woman just haven't found the one life partner that will love me the way I do and matches me on that intensity too

  • @ahmadkhanfedaie6624
    @ahmadkhanfedaie6624 9 дней назад +1

    It is 2024, I am watching your video now. You are talking about my love. I fell in love with her since 2014, but still I could not find her.

  • @elizabethjordan4937
    @elizabethjordan4937 2 года назад +15

    I feel sadness and hopeless I'm so hurt but I'm grateful I came across this it helps!

    • @Atmanstr100
      @Atmanstr100 Год назад +3

      Stay strong you got this ! This too shall pass

  • @Iris11music
    @Iris11music Год назад +3

    .... this video made me cry, when I was hopeless.
    .. Thank you.

  • @ms.tiffco.6830
    @ms.tiffco.6830 8 месяцев назад +2

    Hi Bianca, This was a very powerful podcast. It made me cry because I have witnessed that same type of love with my late parents. My mother had been permanently sick since a few years after I was born. I love seeing my parents together, and unfortunately that love I witnessed went away when my mother became sicker than usual in her last months I saw a change in my father that baffled me. I couldn't understand who was the man I was seeing in front of me during that time. I vowed from that day I did not want a future partner or love like that. I wanted the relationship I saw that my parents had a few years before my mom had fallen ill. I still believe in it, even though I have not met the right suitors. It is challenge to keep my heart open, I am trying though. Starting with fixing the broken pieces from 11yrs ago. I look forward to hearing more of your podcasts. Blessings ❤️🦋

  • @mauyenning124
    @mauyenning124 2 года назад +19

    Thank you B! im literally crying here. I really needed to hear this episode. Today was one of those days where i felt negative and almost just gave up believing true love exist. but thank you for reaffirming that it does and it will happen one day.

    • @thoughtcatalog
      @thoughtcatalog  2 года назад

      * sends virtual tissues * you are not alone friend 🥺💜 we're so happy these words could help you out a little today 🌱☀️

  • @Iris11music
    @Iris11music Год назад +3

    .... this is one of the most beautiful things I've ever watched in my life.

  • @karenKristal
    @karenKristal Год назад +10

    Ive never even been almost chosen, you cant help but think something MUST be wrong with you

  • @kathrinamendoza6040
    @kathrinamendoza6040 2 года назад +4

    Thank you for helping me not feel broken and unworthy.. and thank you giving me hope that I’ll find someone who can love me the way that I love

  • @angelicaclarke7880
    @angelicaclarke7880 2 года назад +9

    I think my personal practice on finding love, and not only romantic... I want friends who see and appreciate my heart as well. But I am cultivating a practice of leaning into love from a wise and discerning space, rather than a naive space. Awesome episode!

    • @thoughtcatalog
      @thoughtcatalog  2 года назад

      Beautifully said! Us empaths have to stick together 🥺💞💞

  • @elizabethjordan4937
    @elizabethjordan4937 2 года назад +9

    I don't feel like I will ever find real love

  • @joshc8574
    @joshc8574 Год назад +2

    i reluctantly clicked on this video half thinking "oh great more love advice" but your words and sentiment were heart felt and genuinely helpful for me at a really low point. Thankyou so much for the reminder

  • @AbhishekSachans
    @AbhishekSachans 5 месяцев назад +1

    It is an addiction for the priviledged. One must focus on oneself and it's liberation.

  • @maggielindemulder6263
    @maggielindemulder6263 Год назад +6

    When I hear or read something from Bianca Sparacino I feel understood. I feel seen. I feel a sense of hope and encouragement knowing that there are other deep feelers and lovers in this world too. Thank you B for this beautiful heartwarming Podcast! I love you! 🌹

    • @dennisraymond542
      @dennisraymond542 Год назад

      You're absolutely right.... Good afternoon how are you doing over there it's a lovely day that the lord has made

  • @mikurealjapanese
    @mikurealjapanese 2 года назад +6

    Bianca! I bought your book !Gentle reminder" and it's the first thing I read in the morning and the last thing that comes into my consciousness. Your words are truly special and healing! Thank you for sharing your light, love and your beautiful soul. I admire you so much:) You inspire us to spread love too:) Thank you for being you! By Miku

    • @thoughtcatalog
      @thoughtcatalog  2 года назад +1

      Miku, thank you for sharing such kind words 🤗 We are so honored to be a part of your beautiful healing journey 🌻☀️ Keep going, we are here for you 💛

  • @elizabethjordan4937
    @elizabethjordan4937 2 года назад +5

    I feel so discouraged and hurt....💔💔

  • @isabellavanstedum3014
    @isabellavanstedum3014 2 года назад +3

    Oh this is exactly exactly how I’ve been feeling loved your book and discovered your podcast never felt words so comforting thank yoy

  • @ibuprofenPill
    @ibuprofenPill Год назад +8

    Future? The future I dreamed about is gone. I’m 53 and never been in a relationship. At this point in life I’ve completely lost interest. I now realize there was no point in ever pursuing it in the first place. There are several things I did well in life, but love wasn’t one of them. It’s just that simple, no need to complicate it.

    • @joseandrada264
      @joseandrada264 Год назад

      If you are 53 and never had a relationship, you didn't loose interest: You never had it

    • @burned_out2419
      @burned_out2419 8 месяцев назад +2

      it’s never too late. look at how many people ended up accomplishing great things at even 80 years old.

    • @staiditude
      @staiditude 8 месяцев назад +2

      But despite all that hopelessness, you survived. You're still alive. That's your greatest accomplishment.

    • @ibuprofenPill
      @ibuprofenPill 8 месяцев назад

      @@joseandrada264 not true. I never said it was for lack effort.

  • @kirkwhite1736
    @kirkwhite1736 11 месяцев назад +6

    After 35 years, there's no one out there for me. Done.

    • @MontemorA-eb1ypy
      @MontemorA-eb1ypy 7 месяцев назад +2

      Don’t say that Kirk you still can and will find love, age is literally just time… time is what? Nothing right? Time is nothing so age is nothing.

  • @chrisxavier3147
    @chrisxavier3147 Год назад +2

    This was so sweet, needed the lift

  • @Iris11music
    @Iris11music Год назад +1

    ... this made me cry, like few other things in my life.
    Because I AM like yo Bianca. My heart, it is like yours.
    And.. the kind of love, that you're talking about, the one of your parents... it's the same my mom and dad had. I've seen it too, with my own eyes.
    .. but, since my Dad died, .. I think I kinda stopped believing in it.
    ... this video, reminded me of who I am. Of the kind of things I believed in, and searched for.. It reminded me of the person I've always been.
    And I can't thank you enough for that.

  • @hannieshouse4959
    @hannieshouse4959 2 года назад +4

    Thanks B, this is such a beautiful message for my heart, and I believe many of us have healed in somehow by listening to your words. I truly wish all of us the soul we all deserve ❤️

    • @thoughtcatalog
      @thoughtcatalog  2 года назад +1

      Wow, thank you for listening & connecting with us 🎧💓 We are so honored to be a part of your beautiful healing journey 🌻☀️ Keep going, we are here for you 💛

    • @hannieshouse4959
      @hannieshouse4959 2 года назад

      Thank you!❤️

  • @mikyl-fo8rh
    @mikyl-fo8rh Год назад +2

    No one deserves to be loved.
    Love is a sacrificial gift.
    If we deserved love we could demand it like a worker demands their wages.
    Until love is understood as a sacrificial gift, it will never be fully appreciated.
    Today, tell someone who loves you, 'thank you for loving me'.

  • @reem__6252
    @reem__6252 10 месяцев назад +1

    He hurt my but I still love him and can’t forget him

    • @Jan-Maggie
      @Jan-Maggie 2 месяца назад

      Me too. Now he wants to know if I want to go to his possible wedding. Told him I don't know that yet but really I never will be able to.

  • @rob_see
    @rob_see Год назад +1

    beautiful message thank you

  • @ModernFrontiersman
    @ModernFrontiersman Год назад +2

    dang....i really needed this video today

  • @baylee8659
    @baylee8659 5 месяцев назад

    Thank you so much

  • @trongveo9483
    @trongveo9483 Год назад +2

    I love this podcast, love your voice.

  • @forjusticeandtruth
    @forjusticeandtruth 2 года назад +6

    Really odd but perfect timing. Thank you, I think love is bullshit, and I haven't felt it from a romantic partner thus far so yes I don't believe it exists... thank you for this video 🙏❤ I needed to hear this and I know a lot of other people probably do to.

  • @beegsex
    @beegsex Год назад +4

    I met a friend at work 5 years ago. I instantly bonded with her & we began hanging out. 8 months later, she left for her hometown & it hurt to see her go. I tried maintaining our friendship even after she left, and it worked for a while. After one bad incident at a theme park, she avoided me for 2 years. We cleared the air about a lot in Jan 2023 & I thought things were finally gonna get better. As of June 2023, we went our separate ways and I was blocked off due to bringing up our past again. I’ve been severely depressed since & I miss her very much. I screwed our friendship all because I couldn’t let go of past issues.

    • @marcusappelberg369
      @marcusappelberg369 9 месяцев назад

      I am sorry to hear that! How does it feel now? What happened?

  • @nicko3313
    @nicko3313 2 года назад +4

    looking forward to hear this soon!! 🤍🌱

    • @thoughtcatalog
      @thoughtcatalog  2 года назад

      Thank you for listening & connecting with us 🎧🖤 Let us know if there are any topics you'd like to hear B cover in future episodes 🤗

  • @Rstakacs14
    @Rstakacs14 8 месяцев назад

    I really needed this. Thank you. ❤

  • @marzenababij5148
    @marzenababij5148 Год назад +1

    Thanks.

  • @azadeyaghubi2609
    @azadeyaghubi2609 4 месяца назад

    I believe that I don't deserve love,and I don't know how to handel it. It's painful. My heart hurts

  • @lauriemorales7605
    @lauriemorales7605 9 месяцев назад

    Thank you so much ❤❤

  • @elizabethjordan4937
    @elizabethjordan4937 2 года назад +5

    I wasted four and a half years thinking he would finally chose me pick me love me and then he died I am so confused and hurt........why wasn't I good enough??😪

  • @stefaniastolz8830
    @stefaniastolz8830 2 года назад +3

    I've been waiting for this one for so long. And I predict it will hurt ...

    • @thoughtcatalog
      @thoughtcatalog  2 года назад +1

      We are here for you ❤️

    • @stefaniastolz8830
      @stefaniastolz8830 2 года назад

      @@thoughtcatalog awww thank you for voicing all the thoughts we can not give a voice to by ourselves.

  • @simonwadsworth9402
    @simonwadsworth9402 2 года назад +1

    What you have said is heart warming, thank you for this. Lol

  • @Jan-Maggie
    @Jan-Maggie 2 месяца назад

    Love is sacrifice. I fell in love with him after 4 years of friendship but he still only wanted to be friends and my heart was extremely broken to pieces and that was because I loved him so much. Its been 9 months of highs and terrible lows. We didn't hear from each other for 4 months. Then I had a tremendous urge to call him so overpowering because a mutual friend had said he might be moving to another country and that hurt me so badly that I would never see him again. I thought it would go to his voicemail because he should have been at work but ge answered and I just straight up answered Mark, are you moving to another country? And he thought it was a job calling for him but then he said , "Jan?" Now we are talking again. Where this goes from here is in God's hands.

  • @cyber0x250
    @cyber0x250 3 года назад +5

    Waiting for this

    • @thoughtcatalog
      @thoughtcatalog  2 года назад

      Thank you for listening & connecting with us 🎧🖤🤗

  • @leawilson6009
    @leawilson6009 3 месяца назад

    Wow, Bianca!!
    Your Soul is Amazing!!
    I've not heard such words before:)
    Many Many Smiles and Cheers!!
    You Are Awesome and Beautiful like Luna the Leopard!!
    You've Got Soul-Shine!!
    Loving. Kindness. Worldwide:)
    💛💛🐈‍⬛🐈‍⬛💛💛
    🐈‍⬛🐈‍⬛💛💛🐈‍⬛🐈‍⬛

  • @bradleyperrine1736
    @bradleyperrine1736 Год назад +10

    Love does not exist. I'm 35 and I've Never Been Loved. I have been told I'm too kind

  • @elizabethjordan4937
    @elizabethjordan4937 2 года назад +1

    I need this!!!!

  • @kehm31
    @kehm31 2 года назад +2

    Will this be available in podcast form?

  • @ImreadyforJesus
    @ImreadyforJesus 4 месяца назад

    I used to hope like this untill a COVERT narcissist came along an seemed to be those things untill i gave up my home and moved im with him.. Be careful dear. Your heart makes you a target 😢

  • @peterrealar2.067
    @peterrealar2.067 Год назад +1

    I feel like an island. I feel so alone in my convictions. I get laughed at, I deal with so many evil people, and it's getting closer and closer to much harder times. I've seen so many instances of long time love just DYING. i don't know if I'll ever be held in the same bed again. I'm a heretic. I'm a social pariah. I'm a non-conformist. I don't know if I deserve forever love after all the big mistakes I've made. I feel like a TOTAL FAILURE of a man.

  • @samaamenem8909
    @samaamenem8909 3 месяца назад

    You deserve to be loved and chosen not almost loved and almost chosen. .👆 Book name please?

  • @cjp2648
    @cjp2648 2 года назад +4

    I'm a 47 year old man that has never kissed a female and never experienced love or a relationship. Through the years I've come to discover that not all of us are meant to experience love. The one thing that needs to be acknowledged is that physical attraction determines the possibility of love and there are men like me who are so physically unattractive that love from a woman is never a possibility. I learned in in this life that no matter what you do, you will not be chosen because you are simple not good enough. We can all continue to believe the lie from women in this world that looks don't matter, when it clearly does more than ever before. An unattractive man with a great personality will only be put in the friend zone and no considered as a potential mate.

  • @jcpolititalk378
    @jcpolititalk378 Год назад

    The problem is I miss treated my ex’s heart for a long time and she started to withdraw when I started to clean up my act and really fall in love with my ex

  • @cathome4492
    @cathome4492 Год назад

    I don't have anything to give but only love..i don't have money, i don't have any house, i don't have any asset, i lost my father, i don't anyone who can support me. I only have a small job and a responsibility to take care of my mother, sister and my niece financially, mentally and in every way.
    People like me does deserve a family? Does I deserve a loving husband? Does I even deserve to be a mother...?
    Boys showed pity on me..they want to love me only for time pass but not for life long committed relationship. I know I don’t have much to offer in a relationship other than love, loyalty...but they rejected me as i have issues in life.
    So many times i have been rejected for this reason..so.. I really don’t think that i deserve any love.. I don’t deserve love, loving husband, children...I ACTUALLY DESERVE NOTHING...

  • @winterqueenkel
    @winterqueenkel 11 месяцев назад +4

    Biologically speaking, many of us will never be chosen. Our looks simply won't pull them.
    I'm 45, and all I ever wanted was a Valentines date one time...not happening.

    • @MrsAlmightyKey
      @MrsAlmightyKey 6 месяцев назад

      Same, still wanting one of those

  • @AMMA92244
    @AMMA92244 11 месяцев назад +3

    Some of us are too ugly, too old fashioned and too old for love. Not to mention there are some of us having disabilities that guarantee no love. It hurts, but this is the reality. I was never attractive enough, never religious enough and often too serious to be given a chance. At 44, I raise a white flag of defeat. I will never find a spouse and will never have children.

    • @MontemorA-eb1ypy
      @MontemorA-eb1ypy 7 месяцев назад

      Omg don’t say that!!! I’m pretty sure that your person is somewhere out there!!! 😢 are you okay?

  • @dave22240
    @dave22240 3 месяца назад

    For me true love has to come through God. The bible says God IS love. I think it will only last following biblical principles.

  • @brandalexhill
    @brandalexhill 2 года назад +1

    B, where is that candle from?

    • @thoughtcatalog
      @thoughtcatalog  2 года назад +1

      You can find the candle & B's books at ShopCatalog.com :) Thanks for listening!

    • @sunshinestar6076
      @sunshinestar6076 2 года назад

      @@thoughtcatalog do you have any idea if you will be shipping in Canada at some point?

    • @thoughtcatalog
      @thoughtcatalog  2 года назад +1

      @@sunshinestar6076 We ship worldwide ❤️

    • @sunshinestar6076
      @sunshinestar6076 2 года назад

      @@thoughtcatalog i tried for the 4 candles and it says no shipping to Canada…

  • @cryptoandzen7611
    @cryptoandzen7611 Год назад +1

    Y are so beautiful😍

  • @CreativeAnswer222
    @CreativeAnswer222 2 года назад +1

    ❤️🙌❤️ Wooow

  • @galacticknight55544
    @galacticknight55544 2 года назад +1

    Do I really deserve love, though?

    • @bernadettebradley7951
      @bernadettebradley7951 Год назад

      Treat yourself with love get a taste of your own medicine 🥰❤️

  • @goldschool9050
    @goldschool9050 Год назад +1

    Look for God. He will help you.

  • @TheShospitali
    @TheShospitali Год назад +1

    Oh Baby your my answer now. You just made me forget all about her. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ Who needs her since I met you! 🎉 Your the missing link to my heart! She can go to HELL! Only eyes 👀 for you now! 💋 💜 😂

  • @propertyfinderphilippines4996
    @propertyfinderphilippines4996 2 года назад +1

    Z

  • @Kibitzer9
    @Kibitzer9 2 года назад +1

    In your feelings? Smh. That’s the problem with people today they are so worried about their feelings they can’t think.

  • @zaynahbeth
    @zaynahbeth Год назад

    This was one of the most sweetest most beautiful videos I’ve ever watched. This helped so much.🥹♥️

  • @frebirdstil1godsson691
    @frebirdstil1godsson691 Год назад +1

    Hopeful too, but I don't think there's anyone out there like me🥹YEAHHHH...7...BILLION people and I can't find her🤣😆...WTF???...ur a sweetheart love 🙂thanks, God bless 🙂✌️❤🌞

  • @elizabethjordan4937
    @elizabethjordan4937 2 года назад +4

    My heart is so broken.....I broke my own heart cause I knew he didn't want a relationship he just wanted the benefits..I fooled myself into thinking I could handle it cause I loved him and maybe he would eventually love me back......he died about two weeks ago and now I feel broken and lost......💔💔💔💔