The Secret to a Happy Life - Dr. Robert Waldinger

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  • Опубликовано: 18 янв 2025

Комментарии • 793

  • @AfterSkool
    @AfterSkool  Год назад +236

    The results of this study really put life into perspective. When we are young, we are seduced by money & fame (The superficial), but in our final days on earth, the things that matter most are love, family, friends, experiences & connections. People on their death beds typically regret the things the did NOT do - Not enough time with family, not enough vacations, didn't express feelings enough, lost touch with close friends. These things are simple, easy and free. So pick up the phone and call the old fried you haven't talked to in years. Express love & gratitude for the people in your life. Share more experiences with them. In the end, that's what makes a good life. It was an honor to work with Dr. Robert Waldinger. Please check out his book, "The Good Life" and consider supporting After Skool on Patreon. Thank you! www.patreon.com/AfterSkool

    • @WiseandVegan
      @WiseandVegan Год назад +4

      "People who suffer from the cognitive dissonance caused by taking the values, dogmas and rules of the technological civilization too seriously can never find peace within themselves. Therefore, the path to true happiness for the modern human passes from a sense of disdain towards the technological civilization." Extract from the book: The Connections (2023): ruclips.net/video/bd5SvSXFrag/видео.html

    • @WiseandVegan
      @WiseandVegan Год назад +2

      Don't expect happiness when you contribute to this 👉 Dominion (2018)

    • @WiseandVegan
      @WiseandVegan Год назад +1

      Veganism and this: The Connections (2021) [short documentary] 💖

    • @j0.ZEF-Who
      @j0.ZEF-Who Год назад +3

      not much here - bunch a rich guys wanted to watch a group of underprivileged kids - sounds like perverts to me this def. not philosophy my dude

    • @AncientActivist
      @AncientActivist Год назад +5

      I've always said that people on their death bed will never say, "I wish I had spent more time at the office."

  • @alexeilesukov6624
    @alexeilesukov6624 11 месяцев назад +167

    For us introverts, being with others drains us of our energy. I'm 60, never married, live alone, a simple humble life, totally devoid of drama, go to the gym often, and overall, I'm content with my life. The older I get, the more I realize that life is too short to be angry, bitter, resent of others, or life itself. If I wake up alive, I give thanks and live that day like it was my last.

    • @LAUGHINGBUDDHAVORTEX
      @LAUGHINGBUDDHAVORTEX 11 месяцев назад

    • @MyWritingJourney9
      @MyWritingJourney9 10 месяцев назад +3

      I think you have low expectations and that is

    • @hobiwater5807
      @hobiwater5807 10 месяцев назад

      Bless u.

    • @One-Ring-To-Rule-Them-All
      @One-Ring-To-Rule-Them-All 9 месяцев назад +20

      Finally somebody addresses this! All the time they tell us "you have to have relationships!" I spent years wasting my energy with other people thinking something is wrong with me, because I have no need for this. I turned 40 and said enough of this! I stopped all but very very few relationships and I have NEVER BEEN HAPPIER. Please stop telling everybody the same thing. People are different and some of us don't need relationships to be happy ❤

    • @jaihindu8817
      @jaihindu8817 9 месяцев назад

      ​@@One-Ring-To-Rule-Them-Allagreed

  • @phoenixrisin2269
    @phoenixrisin2269 Год назад +373

    Enjoying peace and solitude is much different than being lonely.

    • @devildiamond68
      @devildiamond68 Год назад +13

      Indeed, I concur

    • @serenityjewel
      @serenityjewel Год назад +41

      Enjoying peace and solitude is great - most introverts need that - and as long as they have healthy, supportive relationships they can access when needed, there's no harm in it. It's not either-or. It's both. Solitude and peace AND supportive relationships. Justifying not having healthy, loving relationships doesn't erase the facts - people without good relationships aren't happy and die earlier.
      I had crappy relationships and I finally walked away from all of them. I was so freaking lonely. But that void left space for healthy people and awesome relationships to come in. I started doing group activities I loved and reached out to the supportive, fun, interesting people that I met and walked away from people who weren't healthy for me. I also work on my codependency, people pleasing, lack of boundaries, and learned how to identify relationship red flags. It's been a year and now I have the best relationships I've ever had in my life and I'm still focused on meeting good people and having even more strong, supportive relationships. Your past interactions with others don't have to determine your future interactions.

    • @doneicecampbelldority
      @doneicecampbelldority Год назад +6

      @@serenityjewelthis right here gives me hope, am not saying am perfect but the relationships that I’ve gained over the years was toxic cause who I pretend to be but now that I got better and I don’t do the things that I used to do I don’t think they can see me. I think they still see the old me. so it’s hard to be around it

    • @juanmiguelfrissatessa1950
      @juanmiguelfrissatessa1950 Год назад +1

      💯👍❤️‍🔥

    • @jc2386
      @jc2386 Год назад +9

      The energy an time is a hard thing to balance when it comes down to people and just being around today's mindset of stress , trial and tribulations. It better off being at peace than to be disturbed.

  • @gourmetburger4604
    @gourmetburger4604 Год назад +35

    there is a difference between being alone, and being lonely. I am happy being alone, and im never lonely being with myself. Your bestfriend should be yourself. We are born alone and we die alone. But still try to socialize, make friends and keep sharing with your family/friends

  • @jml7429
    @jml7429 Год назад +21

    I 100% believe this to be true. As a extremely lonely person and in my early 50s, I can attest that my health has declined rapidly. Unfortunately not all of us even have the capability or capacity to be in a relationship(s) (friends, family or romantic). This is a very interesting long term study and kudos to the Drs that are doing it. Where this presentation falls short is the idea that lonely people are doing it by choice. I can assure you, we are not.

  • @SophieandMommysAdventure
    @SophieandMommysAdventure 3 месяца назад +3

    this is true, I grew up in a family home of 8 total and when I became older I would say to myself I can't wait to just be alone from everyone! but then I moved out of my family home thinking being independent and alone was a victory when yet I was miserable sad and regretted it. Family helps a lot, even if they get on your nerves in the future you will be praying to be close to your family again. Your family, and friends and community love and support you and there is really nothing that compares to that, and honestly for me wanting to be 'rich' is just for me to be able to take care of myself and loved ones...

  • @CyrilCarvalho02
    @CyrilCarvalho02 4 месяца назад +3

    Thank you very much Dr.
    God bless you with a long ,healthy and peaceful life of 102 years and beyond .

  • @spencer4713
    @spencer4713 Год назад +97

    I can’t express my gratitude for this channel. I was so lucky to find you guys in high school. Growing up watching your videos has taught me so much over the years. Forever grateful❤️❤️❤️

    • @chefgiovanni
      @chefgiovanni Год назад

      Exercise and an active lifestyle are half of the equation. Start eating clean. Eat fruits, lean meats, egg whites, no yolks. You would benefit from watching our Master Chef's cooking videos. Who wants to live longer? Learn more superfoods and recipes.
      🥙🍳🍝🍎🍓🍇🫐

  • @LeoAtTheDoor
    @LeoAtTheDoor Год назад +105

    This one really struck a chord on me. Raised more questions than answers. I’m in a point in my life where I decided to move away from my country (Brazil), away from my closest friends and all my family members, in pursuit of the unknown, the adventure of life, better “quality of life”, more security, an international environment and to explore the world. That’s why I came to europe.
    And even though I don’t regret my choice, is very tough to deal with loneliness. To know I’m far away from everyone. That if I fall in love and raise a family here, my kids will be far from their grandparents, uncles, cousins…(at least from my side). That I won’t be there for my friends biggest moments.
    Of course I can build relationships, friendships, and bring my family closer to me, but all of that takes too much time. I have to be patient. But at the same time, I feel this urge to go back after a while to be closer to the ones I love the most. But people you meet create the paradise you find, I might meet amazing people in the following years…
    Let’s see how life unfolds, but still, burning questions on my mind.
    EDIT (5 months later): following my gut and embracing the unknown was the best decision for my life. After a while, although hard, I’ve learned to embrace loneliness and cultivate self-love, and I’m truly truly happy, even though I miss my loved ones every day.

    • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
      @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад +5

      @@leonard, that is a hard dilemma for sure. I hate for you to have any regrets.
      If you have a big family, who loves you, I’d think long and hard before creating a new life elsewhere.
      But, if living in your home country is depressing, then that’s worth a lot too. I’d just make it a priority to stay in touch with everyone by phone/FaceTime.
      I pray it all works out for you!! 🙏🏻

    • @darkdrift0r124
      @darkdrift0r124 Год назад +6

      I feel you man. I'm stuck with this dilemma too but there are always new friends to be made just have an open mind!

    • @Muninn801
      @Muninn801 Год назад +4

      You're going to REALLY miss people if you have kids.

    • @chantallew8146
      @chantallew8146 Год назад +3

      I think it's super fulfilling and enriching to make new connections, especially far from home with people from other cultures. I've stayed far from home recently, for only 3 months, but some of the people I met there were so warm and loving to me, they already feel like family and now it's like I have a second home there.
      Your people back home will always be there for you, though from a distance, I'm sure you can always count on them when you need them and there's always the option to go back. I don't think you'll regret trying this new path, worst case, if it doesn't make you happy, you go back to Brazil eventually.

    • @vt6653
      @vt6653 Год назад +2

      I think loneliness is a state of mind - you can be alone and not lonely. By the sounds of it you still have high quality relationships just at a long distance. In your case, you are young and made a decision to explore the world and grow as a human. I don't envisage any detrimental impact on you health and quality of life from this endeavour you chose. Building new relationships take time and should be left to happen organically, never force anything in life or the universe will kick back at you. I have known about this study for 2 decades now and I think a lot of people are actually misunderstanding these research findings and are creating undue anxiety in their heads, not least because the researchers are doing a fairly poor job of explaining the nuisance of the results.

  • @FeedEgg
    @FeedEgg Год назад +53

    Oh god this is so ridiculously true my dog died recently and I feel it, he made my life soooooo much better just by existing I miss him feels like my soul is missing a part of it.

    • @weirdo_wolfie
      @weirdo_wolfie Год назад +6

      I'm sorry for your loss. Losing a fuzzy friend is never easy.

    • @majo3796
      @majo3796 Год назад +5

      I am sorry for your loss. I lost two dogs in my life and only thing I can say is that it is really, really hard to get over it. It will take some time.
      Stay strong.

    • @Atlas65
      @Atlas65 Год назад +2

      I'm sorry about your loss. We can love animals as we can love people. Even though we can't have a conversation with them, like we can with people - It shows that love is much more mysterious than we realise. We think that we love our friends, partners, because we share similar interest. At lest when we look for a partner (I.E. looking for love) We have preferences which need to be met. One of those preferences is that we share the same interests, when those things aren't what ignites love. Sorry getting of topic. I was just supporting the idea how hard it can be to loose a pet. Because for some they can love them as much as another human being.

    • @JWayne-ej4jy
      @JWayne-ej4jy 11 месяцев назад +2

      You must get another pet !! Too quiet
      There's a dog praying for you now. Find it
      I wish u the best
      I'm praying for you too

    • @FeedEgg
      @FeedEgg 11 месяцев назад +2

      Wow thank you I did his name is moon and he's a jack Russel terrier I absolutely adore him!

  • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
    @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад +35

    8:55 This is such an interesting point! *Be with someone you can count on-who you know will be there for you in hard times!* If you’re blessed enough to find someone like that, that is!

  • @turtle_king1904
    @turtle_king1904 Год назад +61

    Well done Dr. Waldinger, this study is very impressive. An insane amount of dedication and it really paid off. Thank you!

  • @jadioj
    @jadioj Год назад +27

    This art work is award worthy

    • @michaelyolch79
      @michaelyolch79 11 месяцев назад

      I’d say that over 3 million subscribers is a pretty good award!

  • @kapillantigua1504
    @kapillantigua1504 Год назад +14

    What a great video. I am 34 and I will take advantage of this advice as much as I can. Thank you very much.

  • @harmony331000
    @harmony331000 Год назад +60

    By far my favourite channel, I’ve never disliked a video, they are always great and entertaining, this was no different, thank you!

  • @SoFloSoFawny
    @SoFloSoFawny 10 месяцев назад +5

    My 36 year old daughter-in-law sent me your video and said after she watched it she realized she needs to establish more friendships and socialize more. She asked me to watch it. Now I am forwarding it to my friend I’ve known since birth… she turns 70 this month and says she hasn’t kept up with her friendships since before covid. She stays at home mostly and her significant other is busy with his men’s club. I am worried about her. Although she has pets tgat keep her busy, I’m thinking what she really needs is more friends to socialize with. That will be my mission thank you for this post and continuing the research study.

  • @RikisVlogs
    @RikisVlogs Год назад +15

    Loneliness is one of the hardest things. I am a first generation immigrant, only my parents came here, and we settled in a majority white small town. I didn’t make friends; or felt close to anyone, and now that I am adult working from home, and right now it is the toughest phase of loneliness I am going through. I feel it affecting me, I need people.

    • @DeathrashWhiplash
      @DeathrashWhiplash Год назад

      Where from?

    • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
      @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад

      @@ellie, oh no. 😔 Please give the people in your town a chance! I am white and am friends with people of different ethnicities, and I love people from other countries who come to my country. ❤

    • @Kansascitydraws
      @Kansascitydraws Год назад

      Go out to a local bar on Friday and Saturday night u will surely meet some good people, live A little and quit hiding inside the hpuse

    • @JWayne-ej4jy
      @JWayne-ej4jy 11 месяцев назад +1

      Go volunteer somewhere that interest you. !! It will open a whole new world of good people. Do it

  • @considerthis6889
    @considerthis6889 Год назад +14

    This here is wisdom. We are continually bombarded by media and large organizations that happiness is captured through self-centeredness and self-expression/identification. Then as a society we wonder why we keep coming up short of happiness (or it slips through our fingers like sand). It's always that one additional thing we need to achieve it.
    It's so good to hear this message... given it is the truth and the way we have been designed.

    • @LDJ-r8e
      @LDJ-r8e Год назад +4

      Often time there’s only one thing people need to give or receive to make sure relationships are happy and healthy: apologies.

  • @kristinLB
    @kristinLB 10 месяцев назад +6

    I am an introvert. I’m in my 50’s. I moved to a cottage in the hills and it’s beautiful. But after two years I’ve noticed I’m not as happy. It’s to isolating. So I’ll move back to town. I’ll still be an introvert but at least I can be around people when I want to a lot easier. I also think it’s hard to make friends now, and sadly I feel like love is disposable anymore so I keep to myself.

    • @One-Ring-To-Rule-Them-All
      @One-Ring-To-Rule-Them-All 9 месяцев назад

      I think your need for connection just has to match the actual connection you are getting. You probably found your ballance ❤

  • @VikingVic76
    @VikingVic76 Год назад +4

    No truer words have I heard on RUclips, and yet such a common wisdom is rare today

  • @Mrs-u8r
    @Mrs-u8r 10 месяцев назад +3

    I always tell my children this 98% of your happiness is whom you choose as choose as a life partner Dr. Phil had this topic on his show when I was a teenager 30 years ago and it still rings true today and that is what you were discussing in this video. Be careful who you marry I tell it to my children every single day and this is coming from somebody who is happily married 33 years everything you say is true if you pick the right marriage partner, you really can’t get through anything in life and believe me we have been through tragedy and we are still plugging along strong.

  • @NopeNotTodaySatan
    @NopeNotTodaySatan Год назад +35

    Thank you for making this video! I truly enjoyed it & it’s a beautiful reminder of what is really important in life. ❤

  • @funkyhomosapien1
    @funkyhomosapien1 Год назад +26

    Great video guys. Thanks Robert. I have always said I have never craved to be rich or famous just have my family, partner and kids around me and love them unconditionally and be happy. Seems to be working out for me now. I just turned 40 and have never been happier ❤ 👨‍👩‍👦‍👦

  • @hbdrumma
    @hbdrumma Год назад +30

    It’s hard to avoid loneliness in these modern times. I seek new connections but everyone is usually too busy working or chasing $ to even care

  • @davidstanleyolson
    @davidstanleyolson Год назад +5

    It warms my heart to watch this

  • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
    @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад +12

    Aww, great video. Like the Mark Twain quote said at the end, it’s really all about *L O V E.* As in, showing love to others. ❤
    The truth is that, we cannot ultimately control whether or not we have quality, meaningful relationships, but we CAN control the love we show to others.
    If your heart is full of love for others, then your heart is full, and to me, a full heart is what gives meaning in life, and is probably what these people feel who have quality relationships.
    But don’t worry if you don’t have quality relationships, just never grow bitter, and make sure you have a heart full of love for others. Then, your heart will be full too. ❤❤❤

    • @kirabarsmith9353
      @kirabarsmith9353 Год назад +5

      Just don't show that love to toxic people, or else you become targeted. Discerning who deserves our love and who doesn't is very important from my personal experience.

    • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
      @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад +5

      @@kirabarsmith9353
      True! 💔 If someone is evil, refuses to be helped, or just throws your love in the trash, it’s best to stay away. Don’t throw pearls before swine as the Bible says. Blessings to you! 🙏🏻

  • @ellieramos
    @ellieramos 11 месяцев назад

    Thank you Dr. Waldinger for your study. I now know what to prioritize in my life.

  • @pauladolan6019
    @pauladolan6019 Год назад +3

    I totally agree with your findings. I thought that happiness was having a prestigious and well paid career. Then I discovered my job was interesting but lonely. So I ditched it, 🎉 got married and moved far away, had three kids, different jobs (some fullfilling, others more boring). But I wouldn't have been anywhere happier with my life than now. Enjoying being a grandma with my husband of 35 years and having close relationships with family and friends (here and far away).

  • @dingushatuey5654
    @dingushatuey5654 Год назад +3

    Thank you.

  • @papablue3015
    @papablue3015 Год назад +7

    My studies have found! 1.love! 2.feeling love! 3.giving love! 4.being in good relation ships!

    • @FantasmaOlvidado1
      @FantasmaOlvidado1 Год назад +1

      You have to be love first to receive it.

    • @LDJ-r8e
      @LDJ-r8e Год назад +2

      And people have to apologize when they’re wrong.

    • @papablue3015
      @papablue3015 Год назад

      @@LDJ-r8e Agree! Hardest thing for people! And shouldn't be!

  • @baadfc2022
    @baadfc2022 5 месяцев назад +1

    I’m 35 an have felt lonely and been single for a long time, I work a job where I am isolated. This has hit home a lot!
    I need to get out there and be happy

  • @wendychavez5348
    @wendychavez5348 Год назад +2

    Sharing this, because I think it's important for most people to hear &/or know! Thank you & your colleagues for your ongoing efforts!

  • @natarajansubramaniyam3207
    @natarajansubramaniyam3207 7 месяцев назад

    Happy to have heard you with nice graphics today. May God bless you!

  • @johnvincentleano4673
    @johnvincentleano4673 Год назад +4

    wow! really needed to hear this, years of self isolation and it made me distant to social interactions. Thank you After Skool!

    • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
      @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад +1

      @@john, aww, I pray you meet some new friends soon! It’s great that you decided to get out more! 😊🙏🏻

    • @LDJ-r8e
      @LDJ-r8e Год назад +1

      For good reason. There’s a lot of stupid people out there and the last 3 years showed us just how many. Idk about you, but it was way more than I’d have guessed. But I’m thankful for it because it showed me so clearly who I want to remain friends with and who I don’t. So there was a silver lining. Now that the information, data, facts, and leaks have been made available, it’s pretty clear who was wrong. We just need the people who were wrong, from individuals in our personal lives, to the governments and institutions who failed us, and even the vapid celebrities who mocked everyone that didn’t agree with the current thing. They all owe apologies. So Twain was wrong at the end. We have PLENTY of time for apology and in many cases it’s the very thing that would allow us to have happy and loving relationships, and therefore a happy and healthy life.

  • @giojako1
    @giojako1 Год назад +1

    this is amazing and absolute truth, thanks for the study of decades.

  • @coneyboy
    @coneyboy Год назад +14

    Another timely and amazing message displayed through your beautiful art. You are a gift to the world. Thank you

  • @DBLQ06
    @DBLQ06 Год назад +3

    OMG AfterSkool, you guys are always exceeding yourselves! This information as well all the previous one you have shared with us is life changing, thank you very much!!💖

  • @EffortForever
    @EffortForever Год назад +4

    Thank you! This was a major eye opener.

  • @danishbutter1847
    @danishbutter1847 Год назад +9

    there is no happy life or no sad life as they are just energies and elemental emotion we carry from time to time.

  • @myzticalcrystal
    @myzticalcrystal Год назад +2

    Thank you for sharing!!!!

  • @tdtrecordsmusic
    @tdtrecordsmusic Год назад +1

    id say this is pretty spot on. I used to be hyper-social while growing up. 40 now. friends move on, times a changin... pretty lonely now. I feel like it came from a handful of failed relationships. Iasted about 6 years of being alone b4 it finally started kicking in. now i've got plenty of crap days that i dunno why i keep on living. just keep falling forward is the way I keep going.

  • @brain_unlimited
    @brain_unlimited Год назад +4

    I love how this channel id always so much on point and reveals so much truth

  • @polarbear369
    @polarbear369 Год назад +5

    This is an outstanding collaboration!

  • @mediapr4566
    @mediapr4566 Год назад +2

    a pleasure as always

  • @alvahhunt236
    @alvahhunt236 Год назад +1

    this is one of the best channels ive ever found thank you very much

  • @andin916
    @andin916 10 месяцев назад

    These are so refreshing among all the fluff… it’s hard to find content like this. Thank you!

  • @Kiltoonie
    @Kiltoonie Год назад +4

    I'm a social researcher myself, and I've carried out thousands of in-home interviews here in Scotland over the past decade and more. Some of them are cohort studies like this one, and its a lovely job to have, that helps give me great insights, and takes me to some amazing places. It is not well-paid, but it is intensely rewarding.
    I have nothing but respect for those who freely give up their time, and share their lives with me, in order to benefit humanity:
    Your time is never wasted: and neither was mine ;-)

  • @wellbodisalone
    @wellbodisalone 9 месяцев назад

    The presentation was amazing.
    I agree with them when they mentioned that you need to have someone to count on.

  • @abigailcosta1716
    @abigailcosta1716 9 месяцев назад

    The answer is Love. It's always Love, and it will always be Love ❤️🙏

  • @Donrosco1
    @Donrosco1 Год назад +2

    Thank you guys! 😊😊

  • @Paul-th9vr
    @Paul-th9vr 11 месяцев назад +2

    My life goal was to learn, learn how to do whatever I felt was interesting and required my attention and dexterity and physical ability. It never involved making money, or gaining notoriety, or anything that would elevate me in the eyes of others, just what satisfied me.

  • @alexist6175
    @alexist6175 10 месяцев назад +1

    Thank you so much for this!

  • @zenstoryshare
    @zenstoryshare 11 месяцев назад +2

    Finding solace in peace and solitude is distinctly different from experiencing loneliness.
    0:22: Many young adults prioritize getting rich and becoming famous as major life goals.
    2:43: The study has been tracking the lives of over 2,000 children since 1938, divided into two groups: Harvard College sophomores who served in WWII and boys from Boston's poorest neighborhoods.
    5:27: Good relationships are crucial for happiness and health.
    8:13: Good relationships protect our bodies and brains, even in old age.
    10:51: The good life is built with good relationships and there is only time for loving and not for bickering.

  • @natalylubimova
    @natalylubimova 16 дней назад

    Thank you! That impresses

  • @maguesso5394
    @maguesso5394 Год назад +4

    Fantastic
    Thank you for sharing this summary

  • @jackierugrat8680
    @jackierugrat8680 Год назад

    My family is most important in my life. I would spend all my time engaging in self-care and spending time with my grandkids. By self-care I mean doing things that make me happy like gardening, singing, hiking, walking in nature, cooking, reading. So happy I am able to self reflect and I am contented with who I am. I am not a social media junkie and look for happiness from within.

  • @gorhor9006
    @gorhor9006 Год назад

    You just answered the question that human beings have been trying to answer since the, what is the meaning of life. And for that matter the key to a long and healthy life. Thank you so much for this video my life is complete and now I can go on living the good life. 😭🤞❤️

  • @romella_karmey
    @romella_karmey Год назад +2

    1:30 can’t help but say that tiniest kid in red looks so cute. I don’t like kids but that one innocent kid makes me smile 😅

  • @benjaminholm2311
    @benjaminholm2311 Год назад +4

    Yes, relationships are very difficult. It's important to persist and not give up out of frustration.

    • @LDJ-r8e
      @LDJ-r8e Год назад +1

      If only people knew how to admit they were wrong and apologize, the rest would fix itself in most cases. To have healthy relationships people need to apologize for being wrong.

    • @benjaminholm2311
      @benjaminholm2311 Год назад

      @joleaneshmoleane8358 Yep, but sometimes it's hard to admit we are wrong. Or in the other case what if you aren't wrong and the other person is? Should you apologize despite not being wrong?

  • @gloriaingram
    @gloriaingram 5 месяцев назад

    Oh, what a great time to teach our children

  • @DaLiChannel6868
    @DaLiChannel6868 9 месяцев назад

    This is a very interesting long term study and kudos to the Drs that are doing it. I believe this to be true.thanks for the video 👍

  • @geeyeahyeah
    @geeyeahyeah 11 месяцев назад

    Awww I liked this. I loved that the researcher was the one narrating

  • @marksandor2830
    @marksandor2830 Год назад +12

    Just amazing.
    “Nobody’s a failure who has friends.”

  • @susanarupolo2212
    @susanarupolo2212 Год назад

    I agreed with you but not totally , I have kids in their old 50 years , I am young in my mind and heart. What keeps me healthy and happy ??I look for WHO I am. I exercise , I meditate , I read and I don’t look the tv or news. Yes I have acquaintances , friends maybe two and family that I don’t see them often because they are working hard to be able to survive. I am happy, not afraid to leave this planet, enjoying every moment of the day. I realized I made mistakes, also good deeds, over all we learn from mistakes. Thank you for your information .

  • @jacobfury7035
    @jacobfury7035 Год назад +10

    I want to first say how often I watch after school and how much I love everything you guys have to say, but, I need to address the fact that at least in this video, human connection seems easy for those without physical disabilities. I cannot play soccer with people, I cannot Go to the club I cannot Go to the bar. I cannot do a lot of things that would further human connection. Again I love this channel and all its messages. I just wanna know how I can connect with people when leaving my space is so, so very difficult

    • @elsaduyale7352
      @elsaduyale7352 Год назад +2

      My sympathies!
      I can only imagine how limiting it must be to be physically constrained. I wish After Skool would look into making a video that help us connect better to people that have disabilities that constrain their movement.

    • @MysteryMan2U
      @MysteryMan2U Год назад +1

      Find God first and your answers will come from Grace.

    • @barrybearman3511
      @barrybearman3511 Год назад +1

      Tabletop role playing game groups.
      Elks club
      Moose lodge
      Volunteer at a school in an area of interest you have.

    • @diplomatamaravilhosa2813
      @diplomatamaravilhosa2813 Год назад +2

      We live in the age of internet… communities are out there in the virtual world too. Or you can engage in volunteering in associations to help people with other disabilities

  • @MikeIzerman
    @MikeIzerman Год назад +2

    kudos. PS. stellardrone for the ending. nice!

  • @brucelee4996
    @brucelee4996 Год назад +3

    *Great video.*

  • @doritogomez
    @doritogomez 10 месяцев назад

    I learned thos myself when I turned 28, it was such an eye-opener.

  • @suzannecranny9838
    @suzannecranny9838 Год назад +8

    Absolutely lovely video, so full of hope and wisdom. Thank you

  • @m2pozad
    @m2pozad Год назад +3

    The 'Aging Well' type book I read also included a 3rd longitudinal study- that of gifted females starting at around age 10. This was a surprisingly underachieving and undersatisfied group who did not thrive. And yes, they had less satisfying relationships throughout their lives.

    • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
      @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад +1

      @@m2…
      Wow!! Did it say why? That’s really interesting.

    • @m2pozad
      @m2pozad Год назад +3

      @@PeaceIsJesusChrist Not that I can recall. Remember the focus of the book was on what was working for people, not on the things that don't. I just recall them sadly. Lot's of early potential that turns out more quirky than anything else. Very few had career goals. Yet family life was not emphasized either. In a way they were too independent for their own good. In time, they generally turned sour on life. The unspoken implications to me were around the connections beteen life dissatisfaction and mental well-being.

    • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
      @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад +4

      @@m2pozad
      Thank you for sharing! 😊 It’s almost like they were too smart for their own good-had _too_ many interests, which made it hard to choose one thing.
      And probably saw the reality of life, family, etc.
      What do they say, ignorance is bliss? Sometimes it is!

  • @TruthisclassifiedLiesisnews
    @TruthisclassifiedLiesisnews 10 месяцев назад

    Being true to ones self.
    Don't be close minded ,
    Being honest ,
    Respect & communication

  • @MindWorld
    @MindWorld Год назад +3

    Great video and informative and entertaining! Had a great time!!! Good luck to you and the channel!!!😊

  • @dr.denniskeenan6584
    @dr.denniskeenan6584 Год назад +2

    Very good. Thank you 😀❤

  • @BeachPeach2010
    @BeachPeach2010 Год назад +4

    Love these, keep 'em coming! ❤❤❤

  • @Teamshmo
    @Teamshmo Год назад +14

    Very cool. Every study I have ever seen comes back with quality relationships as being the best thing ever. Crazy to think all of our technology and policies are instead making it harder and harder to connect with others

  • @yessumify
    @yessumify 2 месяца назад

    Needed this thank you

  • @heyreflect.O
    @heyreflect.O Год назад +9

    I love hanging out with my pets. 1 social event is enough for me per week!

    • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
      @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад +4

      @@heyreflect, yes!! 1 is enough for me also. Introverts unite! 😀

    • @LDJ-r8e
      @LDJ-r8e Год назад +4

      Same here. People ALWAYS disappoint. If it was even just 50/50 I’d take the chance, but it’s not. More like 70/30 bad for good. People need to admit when they’re wrong and say “I’m sorry”.

    • @One-Ring-To-Rule-Them-All
      @One-Ring-To-Rule-Them-All 9 месяцев назад

      Well it is good relationships that matter and there is no better and purer relationship than with your fluffy friends ❤❤❤

  • @eloisaanascovillavicencio3366
    @eloisaanascovillavicencio3366 Год назад

    Awesome! Big thanks. Loved your voice. 😊

  • @elsaduyale7352
    @elsaduyale7352 Год назад +10

    This is good to know. I hope this video reaches millions of people and give hope to those that are looking for a purpose to drive their life.
    Someone once said to me...."just find someone to do life with".
    I did!

    • @joemahma3017
      @joemahma3017 Год назад +1

      Me too. 14 years from 16-30. She cheated, divorced, took my son, and now I finance her and her new “man”. Doesn’t matter I worked out in the heat and Sun 8 hours a day 5 days a week so she could stay home. Doesn’t matter that I would bring her home small gifts and sweets she liked randomly cause I was always thinking of her. Doesn’t matter that at 17 I made the decision as a man with integrity and love to be with her and her only mind, body, and spirit. Not only did I make that decision I upheld it proudly.
      I’m even 6’1”, in very good shape, and I have a pretty face.
      Doesn’t. Matter.

    • @kirabarsmith9353
      @kirabarsmith9353 Год назад +2

      @@joemahma3017 When you select a narcissist, it's not going to go well. Too bad we were never educated about them in school as we should have been.

    • @joemahma3017
      @joemahma3017 Год назад

      @@kirabarsmith9353 when you’re right, you’re right. I still love her and likely always will. I should’ve chosen better and that’s something I have to live with. I’m a “you only get married once” person so dating or anything would be polygamy but I have myself and my cat, thankfully.

  • @cartlone2732
    @cartlone2732 10 месяцев назад

    The beginning of life to the end of our life how we lived really matters. No short-cut to peace.
    Peace not just a words puzzle, we have to slowly fix piece by piece in the beginning. Externals happiness or internals peace are like in the hot or in cold. Old aged knows better... 🍂🍂🍂🍁🍁🍁

  • @teronjames7457
    @teronjames7457 Год назад +1

    honoring your responsibility is the answer to all your problem
    that we face in everyday life
    and worth living to do so, to take responsible for everything that you created
    responsible enough to help others in need,
    responsible enough to take good care
    of your self, your family, your job and YOU to have meaningful life
    in respectful way of living

    • @FantasmaOlvidado1
      @FantasmaOlvidado1 Год назад

      Best comment.

    • @LDJ-r8e
      @LDJ-r8e Год назад +2

      And responsible enough to apologize and admit when you’re wrong.

    • @teronjames7457
      @teronjames7457 Год назад

      @@hotrox2112 spell CHOOSE....

    • @teronjames7457
      @teronjames7457 Год назад

      @@LDJ-r8e apologize is not responsiblity.....it's a choice

  • @lisamohammed8484
    @lisamohammed8484 10 месяцев назад

    Very interesting! Thanks for this video!

  • @soundcoremusicmix
    @soundcoremusicmix 3 месяца назад

    Awesome, thank you! ❤🎉😄

  • @russianbot4418
    @russianbot4418 Год назад +17

    *I started doing what I loved doing as a hobby and it grew into a good highly profitable business* that has never felt like work. My work is fun, my customer bases are awesome and my growing friends base is full of amazing people.
    The problem is it brought out massive jealousy in my family (narcissistic parent and useful step idiot) and so far everything I make from my work just goes to endless legal battles with them as they try every way they can to take it and my lifes work from me because they feel that being my family entitles them to control me and my life and if they can't have that, I should have nothing ever again.
    What I do and love is now more just a means to an end to pay lawyers to keep my family at bay one more day due to how useless and or just broken and corrupt our law enforcement, legal and regulatory agency systems have proven to be. Not the lessons I wanted to learn from any of this.

    • @VinOptimaxxx
      @VinOptimaxxx Год назад

      Useful step idiot 😂 look on the bright side - you could be doing something you hate just to be able to pay those legal fees

    • @jamiececilielange5249
      @jamiececilielange5249 Год назад +3

      That sounds horrible :/ Is there any way you could restart without them knowing? Make an extra business and close the first one without them knowing? Could you fake failing at it? Would moving to another place help maybe?

    • @russianbot4418
      @russianbot4418 Год назад

      @@jamiececilielange5249 No. I'm into my business to the point I am a local pubic-level name now and picking up government and big industrial customers.
      I'm too far in to start over and they would just follow me and start their crap over again if I did.

    • @Kansascitydraws
      @Kansascitydraws Год назад

      What is your business?

    • @russianbot4418
      @russianbot4418 Год назад

      @@Kansascitydraws I do specialty work inside the greater recycling industry.

  • @johnmanuel9771
    @johnmanuel9771 Год назад +1

    Faith, Hope, & Love is the key for life
    Brain is the psychological drama
    ✌️ peace. ❤

  • @carlh-thehermitwithwi-fi679
    @carlh-thehermitwithwi-fi679 Год назад +12

    QUESTION! What about those who are happy to be alone, and are not lonely? There is a difference.

    • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
      @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад +3

      @@carl, yes, I wish these studies would factor in introverts! I still think it’s healthy though to have a few close friends and family bonds if possible. Even introverts typically need some social support.

    • @diplomatamaravilhosa2813
      @diplomatamaravilhosa2813 Год назад

      I’m assuming you still interact with people, at least in a comment section on a you tube video right?

    • @diplomatamaravilhosa2813
      @diplomatamaravilhosa2813 Год назад

      @@PeaceIsJesusChristin what time stamp they mention the studies only applies to extroverts? Or the research was done only on extroverts?

    • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
      @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад

      @@diplomatamaravilhosa2813
      I don’t recall that they did. Since 75% of the population are extroverts, and since they didn’t specify, I’m making a logical assumption that most in the study were extroverts? This is typically the case. :)
      P.S. I now see that you are trolling people here. Why be that person? 🤷🏻‍♀️

    • @sparkstudies1675
      @sparkstudies1675 Год назад

      What does it mean to be alone? If you still interact with other deeply on some basis, you're not truly alone. You don't have to be married to have deep and fulfilling relationships. There are many kinds of relationships

  • @eeedw1n
    @eeedw1n Год назад

    Amazing. Thank you

  • @ktmggg
    @ktmggg Год назад +64

    The title of this should be The Secret to a Happy Life, For Men
    As a woman, most of this just doesn't apply. I've been unhappiest and most unproductive in intimate relationships. Being the "helpmate" and bearing most the responsibilities for housework - on top of managing a career - has done nothing but given me burnout. Women are still designated as the carers, nurturers, housekeepers and social secretaries, but it's maddening that we get so little of that in return.
    I'm happiest when single, with a pet to care for and limit the intrusion of other people in my life. Having interests outside of paid work - reading, attending art events, regular exercise, volunteering and travel - gives me more than enough human interaction. There are more people out here who like being by themselves, are happy and don't need to follow a script to find happiness.

    • @PeaceIsJesusChrist
      @PeaceIsJesusChrist Год назад +5

      👏🏻 So many great points and truth to this!!

    • @sparkstudies1675
      @sparkstudies1675 Год назад +12

      Sounds like you just had terribly unequal relationships...?

    • @mehdijakani5519
      @mehdijakani5519 Год назад +17

      You didn't get the point and you started complaining. The point is having great relationships not settling in an abusive one.

    • @KatarinaS.
      @KatarinaS. 11 месяцев назад

      I completely agree with you and have had more or less the same experience, both in my personal life, as well as seeing it in those around me. We're all different as to how much social interaction we want or need and some people are happiest to be completely on their own. I cherish my times of quiet solitude and enjoy my cats very much. Being around others is exhausting to me and I need plenty of time to be alone and regroup. We're not all wired the same, with the same emotional, physical, or social needs, and should live life accordingly.

    • @indigowendigo8464
      @indigowendigo8464 11 месяцев назад

      ​@@mehdijakani5519you don't listen. She had good relationships. They just weren't typical.

  • @20hasbro
    @20hasbro Год назад +12

    I was about to skip this one since I'm pretty happy... But just love these videos

  • @zdzichuZ
    @zdzichuZ Год назад +1

    Thanks for that! Such an effort to do study like that.

  • @semjaengles3297
    @semjaengles3297 Год назад

    Amazing, great job, God bless you❤️

  • @ericrawson2909
    @ericrawson2909 Год назад +40

    I never get lonely, I have always gone to pubs if I need company. Work hard, play hard has suited me. 68 and still studying, designing and building, gardening, travelling, charitable work for the local community. Fill your life with activities if you want to be happy. Being financially comfortable is a huge help, I don't believe I would be a tenth as happy if I was poor. It would stop me doing so many things.
    Life was great until the whole world went totally insane in 2020. I have never been so angry and unhappy because all the authoritarian stuff was obviously doing more harm than good. I don't think I can be happy again until the truth stops being censored and denied, because I fear they will do it all again.

    • @katiekane5247
      @katiekane5247 Год назад +8

      You must NOT let them have your happiness! I'm older & struggle trying to maintain my joy given the absolute insanity I see. We can't let their agenda of constant fear porn & divisive rhetoric meant to keep folks unsettled & more willing to accept increasingly invasive surveillance, less unity among people & measures meant to prevent personal happiness as "protection" against the crisis dejour control our joy. I grieve for what I believed our county to be, it was possibly lost even before I was born. It's really not right vs left, black vs white or even Americans vs Russians. It's right vs wrong & wrong has been quietly allowed to bloom into an all encompassing force unto itself. What will be left for our kids & grands? Not the happy, healthy productive lives we've enjoyed I'm afraid.

    • @diplomatamaravilhosa2813
      @diplomatamaravilhosa2813 Год назад +4

      Just get some therapy… you are focusing on the wrong things

    • @evasco1979
      @evasco1979 11 месяцев назад +1

      I was very happy during the pandemic, I met my now husband, I still traveled (I was vaccinated), life continued. I don't know why you are so focused on it, people already let go of it altogether.

    • @ericrawson2909
      @ericrawson2909 11 месяцев назад

      @@evasco1979 I am focused because the crime is ongoing, and I fear further onslaughts on our freedom.

    • @ericrawson2909
      @ericrawson2909 11 месяцев назад

      @@evasco1979 How can you let go when there are do many non-covid excess deaths, especially amongst the young?

  • @melissajon2011
    @melissajon2011 Год назад +1

    Profound study!

  • @jackvogel9777
    @jackvogel9777 Год назад

    Powerful stuff. Really making me think.

  • @markdollard1084
    @markdollard1084 Год назад

    Excellent video, keep up the good work.

  • @ModernJewelryMakers
    @ModernJewelryMakers Год назад +8

    It would be interesting to do this on women - it also appeared it wasn’t very diversified - so it would be awesome to see this more well rounded

  • @sanam8819
    @sanam8819 Год назад

    Thank you for sharing, this was lovely ❤

  • @georgelesiw7380
    @georgelesiw7380 Год назад

    Thank you!

  • @fondabigbee5828
    @fondabigbee5828 Год назад +2

    This is the second time today that this video was recommended to me. The other was in an email regarding his TEDTalk. I’m going to take that as a sign from the Divine and watch it 😂

  • @moonmoss777
    @moonmoss777 Год назад

    Great episode