No really who the duck thought making CHILDREN movie about DUCKING CHATULU? it's like making an biography of a hentai character set in space on 144×144 pictures of lewded Saturday morning cartoon sidekick that will be shown in schools
Let's be fair, the world is no stranger to making some messed up things kid friendly. Hercules, fairy tales, and even our own history. It's not like Call of Cthulhu is gonna be exempt from making some PG stuff. Hell, they already did that in Billy and Mandy, and that show was already hardcore.
Its actually a psychological trick. Kids love seeing people with giant heads and little bodies but feel anxious with normal sized people. That's why Mickey Mouse has that body type but his enemies are normal sized
I love how Cthulhu in Possum's universe is just Squidward, like not just having a Squidward voice, like he's LITERALLY Squidward, right down to the "Clarinet recital" Seriously, The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy did a kid-friendly Cthulhu better, the episode was literally called "The Prank Call of Cthulhu", and it's much better than this.
The funny thing is that lovecraft's works are public domain.... This means that Possum's version of Cthulu is technically canon since there is no Canon.
Hey you know what would be kid friendly? A film based on a vintage horror novel with incredibly dark existential themes originally made for adults and inspired almost an entire new genre of possibly an even more dark, disturbing and depressing tone
The idea of Cthulhu being a deadbeat who plays the clarinet, whom asks his friends for gas money but then insults them when he thinks he’s safe Has more creative potential then all three ungodly audio visual products burned onto These disks
Its like making a kids movie based on: A Clockwork orange Carrie Children of the corn Godfather The Shining Who goes there? (The Thing) Game of Thrones
It's obvious this wasn't meant for our reality. Some idiot cultist failed some ritual but summoned the DVD of this movie out of a Carcosian Bookshelf instead.
They failed a summoning spell and accidentally summoned bootleg Cthulhu and jellyfish creatures that call themselves Shoggoths when they're clearly not. #NotMyCthulhu
Whenever i see bad movies like this, i keep imagining... What if this is someone's childhood? What if in all the parental obliviousness, someone allows this to become a formative part of a child's life. The kind to legitimaly look back at this and feel nostalgic... What kind of person would they be? What kind of adult are they?
I grew up on the Fred movies and I'm doing great! I got a job for myself as a higher up in the church of Satan, and kick puppies as a day to day hobby. -them probably
Lovecraftian horrors main themes are nihilism, mans futility and our inability to know how little we know, the abstract unknown and the fear of not being able to even comprehend it, the gaining of knowledge not being a source of enlightenment, but of our downfall, insanity and it’s implication, xenophobia, agoraphobia, phobia phobia, and our ultimate state of ignorance. In other words, fine concepts for a kids film trilogy.........
@Fuckth eChineseGovt The Mountains of Madness would make a good kid's adventure film, it's basically any Jules Verne story. Would have to work hard to keep the production team from veering off into The Thing territory though, they'd want to make an homage no doubt.
@@themarchoftime3691 The gods of the Lovecraftian myth are powerful but they don't care about humanity. There is no hope, we can't fight back : That's what existential dread mean.
I'm more mad that a cuthulu like entity, with a fancy name and who is someone of POWER just gets nicknamed *SPOT* by a kid who has the head of an LPS Blythe doll.
It reminds me... when I was 12, I got to a summer camp. And there was a kid who was all-serious believing in Cthulhu. Like, he’s gonna come out from the sea at some point and all those who don’t believe in him die. Seemed kinda wacky to me back then. Still does.
To be fair, it's just as out there as some extreme religious beliefs. Some interpretations of the Bible sound strangely Lovecraftian when you think about them.
@Rhubartu the Saiyan Cuthulu is a fictional character made by the author h.p. lovecraft. Bealeving in him makes you seem like one of those 3am youtubers saying they called elmo at 3am
@@sleeves7622 It's literally the exact same thing as believing in any religion at all whatsoever. So who gives a shit? Why do you care enough to open your smart mouth?.. so sad.
"Then Howard hears a knock at the door so he goes to answer it and sees an adult version of himself, but then the movie ends before he gets the chance to yell racial slurs at anyone." My sides.
@@satireknight I never said he wasn't a bit racist, but please provide literally anything that supports your position that he was racist even for his time.
Well the idea of chtulu mytos Is hope Is just a dream, like all multiverse Is just a dream of azathoth, when He Woke up Boooom all reality Will be deleted,
16:07 Dr. West? As in Herbert West from Herbert West Re-animator? The Lovecraft novel where the titular character re-animates corpses that look like rotted versions of their former selves and attack and kill people? Perfect kid's movie material.
The sociopathic Herbert West, who ends up literally getting dragged to the underworld he was pulling souls from to reanimate bodies, who learnt his trade as a doctor during WW1, through continuously mutilating the corpses of soldiers on his mad Frankenstein-Esque quest to cheat death. Yes, that Herbert West.
A place that only has suffering and meaninglessness that you think is horrible, but once you see outside, you see the true indifference of the universe to your or anyones suffering, knowing that in any given moment everything you know and love will be taken or destroyed without you being able to anything without any warning by things you could never wish to understand as everything slowly drives you into madness until the sweet release of death
If I had children, I would read his books to them. Of course I would skip all brutal scenes and censor racist elements and slurs, but at least it would be better than letting them to watch this goddamn awful abomination.
I remember my mom giving me this movie for Christmas. Guess I was so bad I couldn’t even get coal. Edit: I believe I also got the emoji movie that year. Guess Satan himself possessed and entered my body.
I love how he gradually gives up on Nyarlathotep's name when he has to say it and like the third time he just mumbles. Great videos! Glad I discovered this channel
Kevin Byrnes, it’s funny how accurate and truthful your comment really is, and that’s why Love Craft will always be a better writer than Edger Allan Poe.
Funfact: Dr. West is most likely Herbert West, another character from Lovecraft. What makes him stand out is that he's a raving lunatic who pulled a Frankenstine at least ten times over, with almost all of his creations being roided out zombies, except for one who ironically had no head
"If you're not going to respect the source material, then what's the point? Other than to capitalize on a well known property that you don't even have to license because it's in the public domain." I think you found the point.
"It's impolite to correct your elders" Ah yes, a great message to send minors; Challenge nothing. Anyone older than you is always right, even when they're wrong. Definitely exactly the messages Lovecraft's work included.
From Howard's wikipedia page: He recalled, at five years old, being told Santa Claus did not exist and retorting by asking why "God is not equally a myth."
nah he was probably talking about the elder gods. if you're impolite to the elder gods, you'll experience a type of pain and terror that is fathoms worse than the most horrible, mortifying type of suffering you could imagine.
To be fair, Lovecraft said a lot everyone should take with a grain of salt. He was a neurotic racist white supremacist who was afraid of everything outside of his hometown. It baffles me how that man managed to stay alive for so long
Say another thing. I think the whole part of Cthulhu having an “Astral Form” doesn’t work either. The reason I say is that in the original story, Cthulhu is mentioned to be able to die, but he never stays dead and even dreams in death. The reason being stated is that he exists in a strange state described as neither living nor dead. Why would an omnipotent dimensional monstrosity even have a soul if he’s not alive in a conventional sense? (Aside from the other problems this movie has that is).
Oh yes, because if it's anything children love more than Steven Universe and TTG, it's existential dread, creatures born from a psychopath's obsession with what's in the ocean's Midnight Zone, and the racism of a 19th Century Democrat.
Cthulhu and possum having a casual relationship kinda like they’re neighbors implies that either Cthulhu is a normal guy Or possum is an eldritch horror
wait I have a good idea: step 1: showing this movie to my kid so they think Lovecraft is for kid step 2: show them the real book step 3: laugh at their despair and suffering
Outstanding move i Guess... But the suffering Is Just the closet thing our human BLA BLA BLA can understand... Like EVERYTHING that regards the name "Lovecraft" After all. And i only now realize how ironical that he created existencial horrors and his surname Is probably the less intimidating you Will ever Heard 😂
If Nyarlathotep wanted to destroy your world, he'd just snap a finger and the whole universe would become nothing but flesh and pain, writhing eternally in maddened suffering. He is the fourth overall strongest known entity in the mythos and the only one on that level with sapience; he does not need anyone's help to fuck you over. Perhapd you could say he's just playing a game to amuse himself and pretending to be weaker than he is, but that is not how this was presented. This movie is an abomination... Which is actually kinda perfect when you think about it.
@@notsae66 even though nyarlathotep is a direct offspring of azathoth and yog sothoth is a son of the endless mist yog sothoth is alot more powerful than nyarlathotep
@@jackbaker967 Except Yog Sothoth can't actually do anything on his own, he needs to be invited into himself (a world) to be able to do anything, while Nyarlathotep can just invite himself. Also, Yog Sothoth is only kinda sapient.
Oh... see, and now you understand how little I care about the MCU after Endgame. I can't even get the phases right anymore. Ha ha But yah, there should be an official lineup for Phase 4, if you Google it. I dont know what a lot of them are.
I used to have a collection of Lovecraft books when I was a kid. They were great. But hearing each character being called out name by name here was like a punch in the balls. Oh, you remember the horrifying Shoggoths which oozed through the hallways under the ice? Yeah, this is them now, in a kid's cartoon.
What's next? "Amigara Fault and the Power of Friendship"? "Alien vs. Predator: The great game of tag"? A live action Courage the Cowardly Dog? "50 Shades of Sex ed"?
I already did the second one. Then when I crashed I talked.to cthulu, then I woke up and realized I was in a applebees parking lot with a dead squid about the size of my hand, then I realized it wasn't a squid but spaghetti in the shape of a squid. Then I ate it
This movie is so cursed it kinda made me want to actually real Lovecraft's work. After your descriptions and explainations, it really intrigued me, so... thanks.
This whole review my brain has been divided between getting angry because you're not supposed to be able to fight Cosmic horror shit cuz that's the point and chuckling because of that Hillary Clinton unhinging her jaw joke
Lovecraft: you can't describe these horrors and machinations from the uncharted corners of the cosmos Also Lovecraft: buncha eyes, fuck ton of tentacles, big gaping holes in weird places, horns, gills, and they're big, like real big you guys
What do you mean? Obviously it's the perfect subject for kids! They should learn all about cosmic horror and eldrich abominations and existential terror from a young age!
@@spaghetto9836 I don’t think that’s true. You can hate someone without being afraid of them. Source: have hated things without being afraid of those things.
@Matthew Welch Indeed it is "The Snow Queen" By Hans Christian Andersen, but bears absolutely zero resemblance to the source material other than the fact that an individual with ice powers exists in some capacity. Though it's believed by some that the collective names "Hans, Kristoff, Anna, and Sven" are a nod to "Hans Christian Andersen" As they kinda sound similar.
If your just going to create a identical story to the source, then there isn’t a point. The best way to do it is take the key ideas and concepts and create an original story that also respects the source material. Like maybe a story about Chthulu’s influence on humanity
Shigemi Notoge A comment I did not expect, but I am very pleased to see. I was ecstatic when it was announced that Disney was going to make a Snow Queen movie and then they did no such thing.
Evan Light If we’re going to continue using Frozen as an example, they still did not take key ideas and concepts. Someone in the movie has ice powers, someone in the movie gets their heart frozen, and the main character is female; that’s it. That’s the end of the similarities. This Howard Lovecraft film also does not use key ideas and concepts. Instead, it just took Cthulhu and Howard Lovecraft and other recognizable characters/creatures/settings (kind of) and slapped them in a slightly spooky film that isn’t even scary for the reason Lovecraft stories are scary. Lovecraft (for many reasons) just ain’t for kids and people shouldn’t try to make it for kids.
In at least one parallel universe, Lovecraft became Dr. Seuss instead of Theodore Geisel. And he was best known for his popular book "The Dread Night-Beast of Ulthar in the Hat"
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Fuck is this piece of crap?
Lovecraft isn’t kids material it’s about suicide depression and existential horror
Would you do the other ones or is it too painful?
I found the monkeys really amusing
Nice vid by the way
Possum Reviews happy Halloween.
Why did Mark Hamill voice act in SO MANY random kids movies that nobody heard of?
king of prehistory maybe he gambled away all his money, but was too old for west Hollywood
king of prehistory maybe beceause he is really talented.
@@steinlolboy5085 yeah exactly..lol hes a great voivr actor even if most voices are close to the joker, hes still great to hear everywhere.
I think he just really enjoys being a VA.
I mean, he's STILL the definitive Joker.
I'm surprised there's no Christopher Lloyd
"What's kid friendly? We need a topic for a trilogy..."
"C T H U L H U"
"Brilliant"
No really who the duck thought making CHILDREN movie about DUCKING CHATULU? it's like making an biography of a hentai character set in space on 144×144 pictures of lewded Saturday morning cartoon sidekick that will be shown in schools
Adolf Hutler exactly cuthulu is supposed to be a horrifying concept
The guy who suggested that is just hovering with light coming out of his eyes, possessed as shit.
@@biggsnootinabox561 possessed by mr krabs. Appeal to the kids means more money argargarg
Probably because Cthulhu is a popular creature
There's something uniquely cursed about seeing the animators try and make a cute and friendly Cthulhu.
Everything about this is cursed
True.
Yes it is
The comic was kinda ok
The scp universe did it with scp 2662
"If you're not gonna respect the source material what's the point"
Well, it worked for Shrek
Shrek parodies its source material though, and I feel like it's clear that it's at least partially out of love.
it did not work for bayformers
It worked for tmnt.
Shrek is not only parody it's source material good enough, it also ascended to the meme level.
And shrek is already kid friendly lovecraft's stuff isn't
Ah yes, the Necronomicon. The most child friendly mythological object ever.
Fun for the whole family!
@@Lottabaggage Just ask Sam Raimi or Bruce Campbell about how much Little Bunny Foo-Foo levels of wholesome the Book of the Dead can bring!
Let's be fair, the world is no stranger to making some messed up things kid friendly. Hercules, fairy tales, and even our own history. It's not like Call of Cthulhu is gonna be exempt from making some PG stuff. Hell, they already did that in Billy and Mandy, and that show was already hardcore.
Oh yeah, the book made of human flesh. Very kid friendly
Twilight is already the necronomicon of teen fiction and kids still read that
"Lovecraft kids movie" looks like the fishies are eating kids again
"the snack that smiles back"
@@sirdigsalo1 kid flesh
R/cursedcomments
@@sirdigsalo1 Man Flesh
@Lochlan Smith i dont have reddit
H.P. Lovecraft, known for his stories of eldritch fun and happieness.
Of course! You can't spell family friendly fun for all ages without Lovecraft!
And racism! Don't forget about the racism!
Generic Name Especially the racism!
And cults of fun and happiness can’t forget then
Them
I’m sure Lovecraft didn’t imagine his shoggoths gently whispering “tekeli-li” with an American accent.
Not modern at least..
I wonder how he would feel about an african accent
@@heinokunzelmann8967 I think he would be ok with it
@Digicraftmon the Crystal Gem everybody were at that time
Whats your point
@@ambustio9807 Lovecraft was super racist, even by older standards. In fact people who talked to him would say, "Holy shit dude is super racist"
I'm just baffled by the fact that Howard's head is huge compared the heads of the adults, it makes him look freakish and it just bothers me.
I thought when he stood up for the first time his head would crush his body
Its actually a psychological trick. Kids love seeing people with giant heads and little bodies but feel anxious with normal sized people. That's why Mickey Mouse has that body type but his enemies are normal sized
It's so weird to see the accurate proportions of the adults next to that abomination of a child
@@assassinscreedwalkthroughs7314 wait really?
He was the real horror of this movie
I love how Cthulhu in Possum's universe is just Squidward, like not just having a Squidward voice, like he's LITERALLY Squidward, right down to the "Clarinet recital"
Seriously, The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy did a kid-friendly Cthulhu better, the episode was literally called "The Prank Call of Cthulhu", and it's much better than this.
That entire show was genius.
To be fair, that show made the physical embodiment of death a likable everyman.
The funny thing is that lovecraft's works are public domain.... This means that Possum's version of Cthulu is technically canon since there is no Canon.
The Grim Adventures was awesome
@@chuckordinaasserordaorwhat7682 Nice.
Possum: "Hi I'm a possum and I find garbage"
How have I never seen you before
Nothing Normal I don’t know how but I read it as potassium
Potassium: Hi, I'm a banana and I find garbage
@@ECWPlays bruh
@@ECWPlays please tell me your joking or the comment above me gets a r/woooosh to the face
Like #666
"-before he can yell any racial slurs"
Hi my name is H.P. Lovecraft and welcome to NI-
"I'd like you to meet my cat."
"Spot is a fucking NI-"
*this comment has been vibe checked and it failed*
Xaghi you I hate you it’s nighttime and I’m laughing like a maniac I have neighbors and my family’s here
one of the most powerful gods is shub-ni-
n-african american? phew, that was close, i was almost gonna say ni
*SIR IMMA NEED TO SEE YOUR N WORD PASS*
“This is how Lovecraft described them... it was a terrible indescribable thing”
That’s true!
"The architecture is all wrong!"
*Artist draws generic-looking houses and castles*
He was also fond of Psyclopian Vistas
Best depiction of Shoggoths I've seen are the lovecraft art from Smash Up the card game
It sounds like it would be hard to draw.
Hey you know what would be kid friendly?
A film based on a vintage horror novel with incredibly dark existential themes originally made for adults and inspired almost an entire new genre of possibly an even more dark, disturbing and depressing tone
Nintendo did it well.
Don't forget the racism too 🐈⬛
The idea of Cthulhu being a deadbeat who plays the clarinet, whom asks his friends for gas money but then insults them when he thinks he’s safe
Has more creative potential then all three ungodly audio visual products burned onto These disks
Cthulhu? For kids?
I would be surprised, but in a world where the Emoji Movie exists, I can’t really say it’s all that shocking.🤷🏾♂️
Its like making a kids movie based on:
A Clockwork orange
Carrie
Children of the corn
Godfather
The Shining
Who goes there? (The Thing)
Game of Thrones
An scp kids film lmao
@@warbossbonesmasha3751 "don't go near that pinata, kids!"
@@NoNo-xh7ru Oh, god. They're making another one?
@@AxenfonKlatismrek You forgot 40k
It's obvious this wasn't meant for our reality.
Some idiot cultist failed some ritual but summoned the DVD of this movie out of a Carcosian Bookshelf instead.
Somewhere out there, Cthulhu is facepalming because this is what his followers come up with.
I should have known I was in trouble when Nyarlathotep was working the cash register at the video store...
They failed a summoning spell and accidentally summoned bootleg Cthulhu and jellyfish creatures that call themselves Shoggoths when they're clearly not.
#NotMyCthulhu
If you feel stupid just remember, someone actually think making a lovecraft movie for kids is a good idea
Source of your profile picture?
I have the dreaded feeling that your username fits your profile pic...
@@PIB2000 You are correct
@@pgc2670 Cursed profile pic. I am now infected with the weeb virus.
@@PIB2000 Welcome to the club ;)
They should have just made a kid's cartoon about H.P Lovecraft's cat.
Without changing the name thats pivotal!
Konnos X no, it would be about the cat and the name
With a name like that, that cat could be the most badass black superhero.
MY OH MY I HAVE FOUND YOU NI-
What was his name again?
Whenever i see bad movies like this, i keep imagining... What if this is someone's childhood? What if in all the parental obliviousness, someone allows this to become a formative part of a child's life. The kind to legitimaly look back at this and feel nostalgic... What kind of person would they be? What kind of adult are they?
That, right there, is the true cosmic horror at play here.
I grew up on the Fred movies and I'm doing great! I got a job for myself as a higher up in the church of Satan, and kick puppies as a day to day hobby.
-them probably
Tbh "sleeping in his clothes like a weirdo" totally sounds like something Lovecraft would do. He was an odd fellow.
I don't appreciate being called out like that lmao.
@bryan diaz varela No
@@local38on-tv Who the hell sleeps with their shirt on!?!
But this kid is clearly not Lovecraft despite his name.
Wait i tought that sleeping clothed was normal
Lovecraftian horrors main themes are nihilism, mans futility and our inability to know how little we know, the abstract unknown and the fear of not being able to even comprehend it, the gaining of knowledge not being a source of enlightenment, but of our downfall, insanity and it’s implication, xenophobia, agoraphobia, phobia phobia, and our ultimate state of ignorance.
In other words, fine concepts for a kids film trilogy.........
yeah, he had about all of the phobias, but he was mostly afraid of foreigners
cant forget non euclidean geometry
Jack Baker yeah, curved surfaces!
@Fuckth eChineseGovt The Mountains of Madness would make a good kid's adventure film, it's basically any Jules Verne story. Would have to work hard to keep the production team from veering off into The Thing territory though, they'd want to make an homage no doubt.
Don't forget screaming out racial slurs.
Well there's nothing wrong with teaching kids to love unearthly abominations.
@@danjoredd It's better they learn that at young age before it hits them like a truck when they grow up
@@danjoredd existential dread is for cucks, owned
@@danjoredd what does existential dread mean? is it existential anxiety? or something else?
Of course! Fun for the whole family!
@@themarchoftime3691 The gods of the Lovecraftian myth are powerful but they don't care about humanity. There is no hope, we can't fight back :
That's what existential dread mean.
I'm more mad that a cuthulu like entity, with a fancy name and who is someone of POWER just gets nicknamed *SPOT* by a kid who has the head of an LPS Blythe doll.
It reminds me... when I was 12, I got to a summer camp. And there was a kid who was all-serious believing in Cthulhu. Like, he’s gonna come out from the sea at some point and all those who don’t believe in him die. Seemed kinda wacky to me back then. Still does.
To be fair, it's just as out there as some extreme religious beliefs. Some interpretations of the Bible sound strangely Lovecraftian when you think about them.
Bruh.
Everyone dies. Even us who believe in him. In fact it's the true believers in Cthulhu who will have their souls devoured by him when he rises.
@Rhubartu the Saiyan
Cuthulu is a fictional character made by the author h.p. lovecraft. Bealeving in him makes you seem like one of those 3am youtubers saying they called elmo at 3am
@@sleeves7622 It's literally the exact same thing as believing in any religion at all whatsoever. So who gives a shit? Why do you care enough to open your smart mouth?.. so sad.
''A Pokémon with Syphilis'' It's scary how accurate that is
Gotta catch em all 😁
"Then Howard hears a knock at the door so he goes to answer it and sees an adult version of himself, but then the movie ends before he gets the chance to yell racial slurs at anyone."
My sides.
Jeffery Blocker, that’s the funniest thing he has ever said in any of his reviews.
"Lovecraft was racist"
Hahaha! My sides! Omg, old writers were so racist. That joke never gets old....
@@satireknight I never said he wasn't a bit racist, but please provide literally anything that supports your position that he was racist even for his time.
@@arealhumanbean3058 I mean he was born in the 1890s. He was 20 at 1910. Things were still pretty rough back then
Nobody XIII he named his cat N***** Man
*sees title"
ah yes, bloodborne but for children, gotta teach them young
i mean, thay need to learn the definition of suffering eventually.
Well the idea of chtulu mytos Is hope Is just a dream, like all multiverse Is just a dream of azathoth, when He Woke up
Boooom all reality Will be deleted,
Not if we delete him first
@@jovanvasic999 how do you delete sys32 when you're an mod NPC in Minecraft? Same problem.
@@jovanvasic999 well how you delete azathoth?
When delete, death, destruction, and many more are just a fragment of concept in azathoth own mind?
The fact that I’ve now seen Possum’s hand drawn in a detailed manner scares me more than any Lovecraftian story ever will
16:07 Dr. West? As in Herbert West from Herbert West Re-animator? The Lovecraft novel where the titular character re-animates corpses that look like rotted versions of their former selves and attack and kill people? Perfect kid's movie material.
The sociopathic Herbert West, who ends up literally getting dragged to the underworld he was pulling souls from to reanimate bodies, who learnt his trade as a doctor during WW1, through continuously mutilating the corpses of soldiers on his mad Frankenstein-Esque quest to cheat death.
Yes, that Herbert West.
Absolute madlad
And Dr. Armitage is from The Duncwich Horror.
School is a better representation of lovecraft's works for a child.
Lol.
Thats not even uncaring cosmic horror thats actively malevolent Nyarlathothep horror
Mostly because it makes you go insane wishing to be consumed by the void
A place that only has suffering and meaninglessness that you think is horrible, but once you see outside, you see the true indifference of the universe to your or anyones suffering, knowing that in any given moment everything you know and love will be taken or destroyed without you being able to anything without any warning by things you could never wish to understand as everything slowly drives you into madness until the sweet release of death
If I had children, I would read his books to them. Of course I would skip all brutal scenes and censor racist elements and slurs, but at least it would be better than letting them to watch this goddamn awful abomination.
I remember my mom giving me this movie for Christmas. Guess I was so bad I couldn’t even get coal.
Edit: I believe I also got the emoji movie that year. Guess Satan himself possessed and entered my body.
Hey Health Inspector, watch out of the anvil!
This is far worse than getting fallout 76 for christmast
@peewee neewee well atleast that made a great comeback
The only thing in fallout 76 i enjoy is fighting some of the creatures
How old are you? Because this movie is just a few years old, yet you say this as if it is some distant memory from your childhood.
This movie looks like a ps2 video game cutscene simulator
War of the Monsters (2003) has genuinely superior visuals
More like Sega Saturn
ps1 video game cutscene*
... with a good resolution.
Don’t offend Persona 3 and 4 like that!
@@mreverything7056 sorry pal!
I love how he gradually gives up on Nyarlathotep's name when he has to say it and like the third time he just mumbles. Great videos! Glad I discovered this channel
The necronomicon had an elder sign on it's cover. THAT'S THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF WHAT IT SHOULD BE, IT'S NOT EVEN CONSISTENT
H.P Lovecraft wasn't racist... He was afraid of people with mysterious colors
You get a gold star
Unlike anything seen on Earth
Oh my god, This is my favorite comment
he was afraid of everything outside of providence rhode island.
@@wtatefan1395 thx :3
Why does this movie look like a minimum budget Christian "educational" flick trying to capitalize on the popularity of Veggietales?
It's actually the opposite, it's indoctrinating the children of the worshipers of the Old Gods into the cult of Cthulhu.
WAIT! That shit is popular!?
@@Masterge77 aS thEY shOULd
@@Masterge77 you are joking... Ain't you?
Like Dorbees?
They made Howard's father look like Edgar Allen Poe.
I mean that probably the only good thing they did in the movie, it's like a respect to Lovecraft owing some of his Ideas to Edgar
@Kevin Byrnes nevermoooore
Kevin Byrnes, it’s funny how accurate and truthful your comment really is, and that’s why Love Craft will always be a better writer than Edger Allan Poe.
Yeah...Lord Dunsany would have been more appropriate!
He does I agree.
This was shown in a school I went to, as a reward, and everyone realized how bad it was
yall must've been very naugthy boys then >: (
I wish the teachers would play this in school so I can point out he was a racist and his cat was named after a racial slur
@@TheCarDemoticDat'd be funneh.
Funfact: Dr. West is most likely Herbert West, another character from Lovecraft. What makes him stand out is that he's a raving lunatic who pulled a Frankenstine at least ten times over, with almost all of his creations being roided out zombies, except for one who ironically had no head
He did...it just wasn't attached.
"But the movie ends before he can yell racial slurs at anyone" a setence i didn't think if hear today
I'm guessing its a joke, but no one can correctly pronounce Chtulu, there is no correct pronountiation...
You can even spell it right
True. It's the closest our human speech organs can come to pronouncing it.
Well Mr lovecraft tried to make it so that is wasn't pernounsable (sorry if I misspelled their) just a fun fact
@@linktriforce9669 he shoulda have made it out of moonrunes instead
I know how to spell it
"Pictured: Not Mark Zuckerberg"
Holy shit I've never realized how similar they are.
Now I have more questions
Mark is HP reincarnated.
@@grandarkfang_1482 please do not dirty Lovecrafts name with that comparison. At least Lovecraft has some dignity
@@ridiculousrandy1401 you assume robo lizards lack dignity? Harsh
I will never be able to see Zucc, King of Lizardmen the same ever again.
@@ridiculousrandy1401 to also being racist?
"If you're not going to respect the source material, then what's the point? Other than to capitalize on a well known property that you don't even have to license because it's in the public domain."
I think you found the point.
Can't wait for the 'I have no mouth and I must scream' spin off. Can't wait to see what kind of goofy antics Dr. Nimdoc gets up to
OH MY GOD HELP
"The Dome" tv kids show surely will show us how humans deal sanely in situations of extreme stress.
“Are you coming to my clarinet recital”
(Five seconds later)
“It makes me look like a looser”
Big Daddy, a bit of an a hole thing to do but...
Loser*
vincent vasquez thank you
"It's impolite to correct your elders" Ah yes, a great message to send minors; Challenge nothing. Anyone older than you is always right, even when they're wrong. Definitely exactly the messages Lovecraft's work included.
From Howard's wikipedia page: He recalled, at five years old, being told Santa Claus did not exist and retorting by asking why "God is not equally a myth."
@@jojones4685 oof
nah he was probably talking about the elder gods.
if you're impolite to the elder gods, you'll experience a type of pain and terror that is fathoms worse than the most horrible, mortifying type of suffering you could imagine.
To be fair, Lovecraft said a lot everyone should take with a grain of salt. He was a neurotic racist white supremacist who was afraid of everything outside of his hometown. It baffles me how that man managed to stay alive for so long
Well, who said his actual messages were any better?
Possum: they're wearing masks because they don't have to animate their faces now.
Ad: WELCOME TO THE SCIENCE OF CHARACTER ANIMATION
Say another thing. I think the whole part of Cthulhu having an “Astral Form” doesn’t work either.
The reason I say is that in the original story, Cthulhu is mentioned to be able to die, but he never stays dead and even dreams in death. The reason being stated is that he exists in a strange state described as neither living nor dead. Why would an omnipotent dimensional monstrosity even have a soul if he’s not alive in a conventional sense? (Aside from the other problems this movie has that is).
Possum's laugh attack when he says "So he lights Abdul on fire" is just perfect 19:22
He failed his Sanity Roll. 🤯😵😵💫🤪
@caitlyncarvalho7637 I guess you are not familiar with the Call of Cthulhu RPG.
@caitlyncarvalho7637 I was referring to Possum laughing manically.
@caitlyncarvalho7637It was your comment that was irrelevant to the original post...
Mark Hamill's voice in this movie sounds like he is a JoJo villain.
God, now I want Mark to voice Funny Valentine. Or Gyro.
It would be great if they hire Mark to be the voice of Diavolo and King Crimson, now we're talking Joker being a real crime boss.
@@drcks...
Drix Reyes how about no.
HINJAKU
HINJAKU
Why is your version of Cthulhu just Squidward if he was a heterosexual
>implying Squidward isn't already hetero.
Squidwards a bisexual let him do what he wants
Wait how did I miss Squidwards sexuality?
Or Cleveland Brown...
Squidward wasnt...
*oh my god*
Oh yes, because if it's anything children love more than Steven Universe and TTG, it's existential dread, creatures born from a psychopath's obsession with what's in the ocean's Midnight Zone, and the racism of a 19th Century Democrat.
God teen Titans go gives a fucking stroke
spoopywolf360 Fuck Teen Titans Go!
Absolute trash.
@@TheRaven_200 Agreed. 100% trash
Maybe that's better. Maybe it's better than the cringe fest of ttg or the sjw toxic dump of su.
@@gagejohnathan9641 Maybe, maybe it's worse or on equal level to one or the other.
Cthulhu and possum having a casual relationship kinda like they’re neighbors implies that either
Cthulhu is a normal guy
Or
possum is an eldritch horror
“This isn’t a shoggoth it looks like Jim Henson’s kidney stone”
Made my day
I actually wanna see possum review the other two now
wait I have a good idea:
step 1: showing this movie to my kid so they think Lovecraft is for kid
step 2: show them the real book
step 3: laugh at their despair and suffering
_Okay, that is some Lovecraftian level of dick move right here._
Major Blitz AND I LIKE IT
OH GOD XD
A dizzying blow to body and brain!
Outstanding move i Guess...
But the suffering Is Just the closet thing our human BLA BLA BLA can understand... Like EVERYTHING that regards the name "Lovecraft" After all.
And i only now realize how ironical that he created existencial horrors and his surname Is probably the less intimidating you Will ever Heard 😂
And leaves before he can start yelling racial slurs at anyone
Hellboy, Pinhead and The Joker in the same movie, never would I have thought we would experience this.
The crossover we didn't know we wanted untill it happened
Which one was Doug Bradley?
really gravity falls the closest to Lovecraft I've ever seen a cartoon get wile still remaining kid friendly.
Except there no religious themes kinda.
@@Bob-op1ue there's also no skiving racism
@@ragmuffin407 im gonna have to look that word up
Looked it up. The racism was taking a day off? That word does not go there
Even then gravity falls had moments where it pushed the boundaries with dark themes but I like that
It is said in his stories that anyone who looks at Cthulhu will either go insane or become a worshiper which means that kid is most likely insane
If Nyarlathotep wanted to destroy your world, he'd just snap a finger and the whole universe would become nothing but flesh and pain, writhing eternally in maddened suffering. He is the fourth overall strongest known entity in the mythos and the only one on that level with sapience; he does not need anyone's help to fuck you over. Perhapd you could say he's just playing a game to amuse himself and pretending to be weaker than he is, but that is not how this was presented.
This movie is an abomination...
Which is actually kinda perfect when you think about it.
I saw Nyarlathotep and thought you were making a Persona 2 reference.
wasnt yog sothoth also sapient?
@@jackbaker967
Yes, but Yog Sothoth is considerably weaker than Nyarlathotep.
@@notsae66 even though nyarlathotep is a direct offspring of azathoth and yog sothoth is a son of the endless mist yog sothoth is alot more powerful than nyarlathotep
@@jackbaker967
Except Yog Sothoth can't actually do anything on his own, he needs to be invited into himself (a world) to be able to do anything, while Nyarlathotep can just invite himself. Also, Yog Sothoth is only kinda sapient.
Your crudely drawn possum is a more compelling character than the entire Marvel Phase 4 roster.
Phase 4 was perfectly balance , with good well written characters like thanos , and disgraces to the universe like captain marvel
@@MrManueldx was that phase 4? Sorry, I meant phase 5.
@@LetralXIV Are they doing anything in Phase 5, the only Phase 5 movie I have seen was Spiderman: Far from Home.
No you were right. Endgame was the last film of Phase 3
Oh... see, and now you understand how little I care about the MCU after Endgame. I can't even get the phases right anymore. Ha ha
But yah, there should be an official lineup for Phase 4, if you Google it. I dont know what a lot of them are.
Man, there really isn’t anymore creativity or shame in this world
Plot twist: the entire movie is just one long drugs trip...
Light Lom well, Lovecraft did have a history of drug usage, so it isn’t out of the question
@@gunja556 honestly, i wouldn't be suprised XD
Case in point, this video.
@@gunja556 source? That is actually new to me.
Lovecraft is probably turning himself in his grave.
that's true.
Ironic considering its said by another Eldritch abomination
Dr. West must’ve given him that damn reagent again
I used to have a collection of Lovecraft books when I was a kid. They were great. But hearing each character being called out name by name here was like a punch in the balls. Oh, you remember the horrifying Shoggoths which oozed through the hallways under the ice? Yeah, this is them now, in a kid's cartoon.
What's next?
"Amigara Fault and the Power of Friendship"?
"Alien vs. Predator: The great game of tag"?
A live action Courage the Cowardly Dog?
"50 Shades of Sex ed"?
A Game of Musical Chairs
@@wamlythecrabgod2199 The Shape Cube
schizophrenia the musical
Schindler's shopping list
The Witcher 3: what hunt
Battlefield 1 where nobody dies
Wait'll those kiddos want to give their cats an ah... ｉｎｔｅｒｅｓｔｉｎｇ name in tribute to old Howard should they do.any independent research.
Princess Rainbovvs X Musashi I know EXACTLY what you mean and I wish I hadn’t
The rats in the walls
@@jojones4685 That cat was named after a cat he had IRL. Makes it a tad worse.
Cat's name being ******man
the only reason anyone should watch this is to either
A : review it
B : watch it on drugs
I did. Its the best harry potter movie I've ever seen
I already did the second one. Then when I crashed I talked.to cthulu, then I woke up and realized I was in a applebees parking lot with a dead squid about the size of my hand, then I realized it wasn't a squid but spaghetti in the shape of a squid. Then I ate it
It's fun to watch when stoned as fuck, probably even better on Acid, then I can have some fun with Anios and the Collective Conciousness.
Eh. One b too many.
This would never be good on any type of substance.
@@Eshtian you are certainly a very fun person, I bet you don't know anything about Weed.
I saw this in a hospital and was worried i'd never find it to ridicule it, so thanks for the help.
It wasn't an Asylum?
@@dubuyajay9964 eh same difference.
Love how you just glossed over them EXPLODING A SHOGOTH INTO BLOOD AND GORE ON SCREEN IN A KIDS ANIMATION.
The shoggoths are just modded models of the Netch creatures from Skyrims Dragonborn DLC
ExACTly
Yeah
Oh my God they are...
The Netch are actually from as far back as Morrowind.
I just want to point out that in this movie, Howard's dad is just Edgar Allan Poe.
Hmmm something is strange
@@WorshipperOfKhone no no no. It's even WRONG. i can say.
Well, Lovecraft did idolize Edgar Allan Poe as well as Lord Dunsany.
Love how Cthulhu sounds like a mix of Cleveland Brown and Squidward
This movie is so cursed it kinda made me want to actually real Lovecraft's work. After your descriptions and explainations, it really intrigued me, so... thanks.
The creator of this movie must know some really dark shit about these actors to get them in this dumpster fire
This whole review my brain has been divided between getting angry because you're not supposed to be able to fight Cosmic horror shit cuz that's the point and chuckling because of that Hillary Clinton unhinging her jaw joke
Everybody Gangsta until the animated RUclipsr’s persona has angry eyebrows
"The production quality is indeed comic, but the joke is on the poor saps who bought this movie."
- Director Sean O'Reilly, probably
17:50 that dagon father of the deep ones can tell that Howard is turning into a deep one would be the first thing that makes sense
Lovecraft: you can't describe these horrors and machinations from the uncharted corners of the cosmos
Also Lovecraft: buncha eyes, fuck ton of tentacles, big gaping holes in weird places, horns, gills, and they're big, like real big you guys
My man was just tripping hard on some 1800s drugs while reading hentai one day
Bad sign when Digimon took influences from Lovecraft, and did it a whole lot better.
I'm suddenly interested in Digimon
@@pureevil9496 i recommend tamers or the first series.
@@moonbane8121 same
@Clown Supremacist
Depending on which game
Dragomon.
"Maybe I can continue this video without interruptions"
*gets ad*
rizadon -
Gets AIDS
That's the joke
Top notch humor
@@dasolemnvizitah4473 but the JOkE didn't go over any ones head.
@@zcgamerandreacts2762 Then why explain the joke?
Lovecraft’s writings are quite literally THE WORST thing to make a kid’s movie out of
What do you mean? Obviously it's the perfect subject for kids! They should learn all about cosmic horror and eldrich abominations and existential terror from a young age!
Molbo the First exactly
@kristian rikardsen facts
kristian rikardsen technically it’s for teens
I'm guessing you forgot about the Disney movie Song of the South
Me enjoying the deep commentary.
1 braincell: moonkaay
Monn kee
"Almost makes you forget he grows up to become a screaming racist"
I'M DEAD
So is he.
Ironic, isn't it?
Technically he wasn't racist. He was afraid of people that weren't western.
So he was just stupid.
@@Lottabaggage Yeahhh but if you look at the definition of "racist" he falls neatly into that alley. All racists are afraid of what's different.
@@spaghetto9836
I don’t think that’s true. You can hate someone without being afraid of them.
Source: have hated things without being afraid of those things.
I’m an adult and I can’t spell Cthulhu without the help of google
There's a psychedelic rockband called "Lovecraft", and their music includes the clarinet.
Coincidence? I think so!
Imagine making a world ending monster become family friendly
NekoMikoYe Some shows actually do it but this is...no....
Well, he is more unintentionaly destroying the world
Take a shot every time he says "Howard and X escape through a portal."
Also a major theme is that we're so small in the eyes of the great old ones that they dont even care.
King Abdul ?
Damn, Al-Hazred went from crazy Hermit to King in no time
I love how Dagon basically just popped up to say hello, saw the journal and was like "Yoink!"
“Maybe I can do this video without any other interruptions “
*Ad starts playing immediately after*
9:48
The difference in the size of the heads is unsettling
I live for your humor and delivery
The way you present your patrons, you are a genious.
"If you're not going to respect the source material, then what's the point?"
_cough_ Frozen _cough_
They cannot respect what they do not understand.
@Matthew Welch Indeed it is "The Snow Queen" By Hans Christian Andersen, but bears absolutely zero resemblance to the source material other than the fact that an individual with ice powers exists in some capacity.
Though it's believed by some that the collective names "Hans, Kristoff, Anna, and Sven" are a nod to "Hans Christian Andersen" As they kinda sound similar.
If your just going to create a identical story to the source, then there isn’t a point. The best way to do it is take the key ideas and concepts and create an original story that also respects the source material. Like maybe a story about Chthulu’s influence on humanity
Shigemi Notoge A comment I did not expect, but I am very pleased to see. I was ecstatic when it was announced that Disney was going to make a Snow Queen movie and then they did no such thing.
Evan Light If we’re going to continue using Frozen as an example, they still did not take key ideas and concepts. Someone in the movie has ice powers, someone in the movie gets their heart frozen, and the main character is female; that’s it. That’s the end of the similarities. This Howard Lovecraft film also does not use key ideas and concepts. Instead, it just took Cthulhu and Howard Lovecraft and other recognizable characters/creatures/settings (kind of) and slapped them in a slightly spooky film that isn’t even scary for the reason Lovecraft stories are scary. Lovecraft (for many reasons) just ain’t for kids and people shouldn’t try to make it for kids.
2:21 why dose this sound like the majority’s of the Dr.Seuss movies
except those can be enjoyed ironically
In at least one parallel universe, Lovecraft became Dr. Seuss instead of Theodore Geisel.
And he was best known for his popular book "The Dread Night-Beast of Ulthar in the Hat"
Usually I can't stand ads that interrupt the video but you managed to make a joke out of it and I love that