Congratulations on discovering something important about yourself. I hope you're accepting towards yourself and (if necessary) forgiving towards your past self.
It's important everyone follows the sexuality they feel most comfortable with. There will be some people who have followed heterosexual lifestyles because they feel it's expected of them or even because they feel flattered by the interest of someone of the opposite sex. Younger people most feel this pressure but there are some who are middle or even older aged who have followed a lifestyle not for them for decades. If a person feels happier with someone of the same sex they need to follow that. They can still have strong friendships with those of the opposite sex and it's nice to hear you are still on good terms with your former boyfriend.
Congrats Dana! 🙂 Rich does sound like a truly fantastic person!!! It's a very positive thing that he can also find somebody who's 100% for him (if/when he wants to) and how amazing of him to support you through the poly phase too, he just sounds like an all around extremely supportive and very kind guy! 😃 I'm glad you two had 8 years together and grew as people together, and now you can both branch off and continue to grow as individuals and as good friends 😊 I did perk up like a meerkat when you said "my now ex partner" in one of your previous videos 😂 I just immediately hoped that both you and Rich were okay, no intense heartbreak and still comfortable in your guy's home together, so I'm happy to hear that is the case!!! 🙂 I'm sorry that for years you essentially had your true sexuality bullied out of you, I'm very hopeful that this new generation are moving away from all that homophobic bs! Better late than never I always say! 🤣 I've often wondered myself if I'm attracted to women or could actually be with a woman, I guess during this current phase of mine whereby I don't want to be with anyone at all for a while, it's not the best time to be able to tell for sure! 😂 But it has crossed my mind many times 👀😂 I hope your mom's well and that your furbabies are super happy 🥰 See you again in a few days 😁😃
I rly relate to your struggles with heteronormative ideas. For the longest time I considered myself a straight man because that's what was acceptable as an identity in my head even if I felt otherwise. Because my family wasn't that educated on trans stuff and because I couldn't understand what I was feeling, I would sometimes experiment with my gender but get shoved back in the closet from dysphoria. I didn't want to be masculine/I saw masculinity as something unachievable for me, yet I continued to act like a guy because I knew it's what I was "supposed to do." I'm still working on being a woman in a way that works for me, but being autistic makes putting on and wearing makeup difficult for me and the intense fear of rejection I have for even attempting to shift my voice higher makes me just seem like a guy. I don't get to live just as a trans woman because I can't separate my autism and trans identity.
Also, I'm pansexual, which wasn't easy for me to accept, but it wasn't as hard as coming out as a woman. I'm also poly so it's nice to hear someone else being open about being in a poly relationship even if things didn't work out.
Being a woman isn't a "costume" is a biological fact! Wanting to wear a dress or put some makeup on your face doesn't make you a woman. You are just a man who likes makeup and wears dresses (nothing wrong about it obviously) but none of this stuff makes you a woman or turns you into a woman, also because changing sex is in fact impossible🤷
@@liv0003 good thing I don't need to "change sex" to be a woman. Just like I don't need hair (bald women exist), ovaries (women get hysterectomies), boobs (double mastectomies from breast cancer)... Remind me how I don't have what it takes to be a woman meanwhile you wear that ugly mindset and think that somehow makes you more woman? Sorry sweetie, go take testosterone if you think it's so impossible to change gender. I can't imagine you will be happy in your body unless the real reason you are giving me shit is because no one has ever told you that you're allowed to be a man.
I can’t tell you I’m in the same situation but congratulations on finding yourself and I hope you’re very proud to have been strong enough to decide to put yourself in an uncertain situation so that long term you will be happy. I’m sure Rich is an amazing guy and will be a wonderful partner to someone if you had remained together with him you would not have been happy so tackling the situation head on was the right way to do it because he’s also getting a chance to find his right partner. You were very brave to take on online dating and I am glad you were successful. I hope you’re happy to have made this video and shared a different part of yourself. I’m sure there’s many people in your situation or a similar one so I hope you find them.
Catching up on your older videos after having watched a number of newer ones is a weird experience. I wish I could show your more recent videos to past you. Retroactive hugs!
I'm not in your situation but I'm currently also starting to realize I might not be as pansexual/romantic as I thought I was. But it's kind of difficult to figure out since I'm also aro/acespec 😅 xD Therefore I've never actually been in a romantic or sexual relationship, because the two times I would have been interested the other person wasn't. But those two people have been women and I'm starting to suspect I might only ever develop feelings like that for women. Who knows 🤷♂️ xD
I always called myself bi curious because I liked kissing guys and girls in school but once I met my ex husband I knew I preferred men sexually and that kissing women was as far as I cared to go sexually with them. 13 years later he and I divorced (he was a raging alcoholic, compulsive liar, etc) and I ended up becoming friends with a lesbian girl many years younger than me… of course kissing commenced on nights of partying, proceeded by my first full sexual experience with a female. she ended up falling for me and for 2 years begged me to be her girlfriend and although I loved her deeply, it wasn’t a romantic love and I just didn’t feel the same as her. I knew after that I just am not attracted to women that way and realized that the kissing never really turned me on but was still sexy and thrilling to me… just fun to watch the other person enjoy it. Interesting little coincidence I noticed…. You and Rich got together in November and ended in February….. same exact months for me and my ex-husband.
Congratulations on discovering something important about yourself.
I hope you're accepting towards yourself and (if necessary) forgiving towards your past self.
It's important everyone follows the sexuality they feel most comfortable with. There will be some people who have followed heterosexual lifestyles because they feel it's expected of them or even because they feel flattered by the interest of someone of the opposite sex. Younger people most feel this pressure but there are some who are middle or even older aged who have followed a lifestyle not for them for decades. If a person feels happier with someone of the same sex they need to follow that. They can still have strong friendships with those of the opposite sex and it's nice to hear you are still on good terms with your former boyfriend.
Congrats Dana! 🙂 Rich does sound like a truly fantastic person!!! It's a very positive thing that he can also find somebody who's 100% for him (if/when he wants to) and how amazing of him to support you through the poly phase too, he just sounds like an all around extremely supportive and very kind guy! 😃
I'm glad you two had 8 years together and grew as people together, and now you can both branch off and continue to grow as individuals and as good friends 😊
I did perk up like a meerkat when you said "my now ex partner" in one of your previous videos 😂 I just immediately hoped that both you and Rich were okay, no intense heartbreak and still comfortable in your guy's home together, so I'm happy to hear that is the case!!! 🙂
I'm sorry that for years you essentially had your true sexuality bullied out of you, I'm very hopeful that this new generation are moving away from all that homophobic bs!
Better late than never I always say! 🤣 I've often wondered myself if I'm attracted to women or could actually be with a woman, I guess during this current phase of mine whereby I don't want to be with anyone at all for a while, it's not the best time to be able to tell for sure! 😂 But it has crossed my mind many times 👀😂
I hope your mom's well and that your furbabies are super happy 🥰 See you again in a few days 😁😃
I rly relate to your struggles with heteronormative ideas. For the longest time I considered myself a straight man because that's what was acceptable as an identity in my head even if I felt otherwise. Because my family wasn't that educated on trans stuff and because I couldn't understand what I was feeling, I would sometimes experiment with my gender but get shoved back in the closet from dysphoria. I didn't want to be masculine/I saw masculinity as something unachievable for me, yet I continued to act like a guy because I knew it's what I was "supposed to do." I'm still working on being a woman in a way that works for me, but being autistic makes putting on and wearing makeup difficult for me and the intense fear of rejection I have for even attempting to shift my voice higher makes me just seem like a guy. I don't get to live just as a trans woman because I can't separate my autism and trans identity.
Also, I'm pansexual, which wasn't easy for me to accept, but it wasn't as hard as coming out as a woman. I'm also poly so it's nice to hear someone else being open about being in a poly relationship even if things didn't work out.
Being a woman isn't a "costume" is a biological fact! Wanting to wear a dress or put some makeup on your face doesn't make you a woman. You are just a man who likes makeup and wears dresses (nothing wrong about it obviously) but none of this stuff makes you a woman or turns you into a woman, also because changing sex is in fact impossible🤷
@@liv0003 good thing I don't need to "change sex" to be a woman. Just like I don't need hair (bald women exist), ovaries (women get hysterectomies), boobs (double mastectomies from breast cancer)... Remind me how I don't have what it takes to be a woman meanwhile you wear that ugly mindset and think that somehow makes you more woman? Sorry sweetie, go take testosterone if you think it's so impossible to change gender. I can't imagine you will be happy in your body unless the real reason you are giving me shit is because no one has ever told you that you're allowed to be a man.
I can’t tell you I’m in the same situation but congratulations on finding yourself and I hope you’re very proud to have been strong enough to decide to put yourself in an uncertain situation so that long term you will be happy. I’m sure Rich is an amazing guy and will be a wonderful partner to someone if you had remained together with him you would not have been happy so tackling the situation head on was the right way to do it because he’s also getting a chance to find his right partner. You were very brave to take on online dating and I am glad you were successful. I hope you’re happy to have made this video and shared a different part of yourself. I’m sure there’s many people in your situation or a similar one so I hope you find them.
the youtuber Alayna Joy went through something similar !! I don't know if you've seen her videos on it but you might find them relevant and relatable!
Catching up on your older videos after having watched a number of newer ones is a weird experience. I wish I could show your more recent videos to past you. Retroactive hugs!
I'm not in your situation but I'm currently also starting to realize I might not be as pansexual/romantic as I thought I was. But it's kind of difficult to figure out since I'm also aro/acespec 😅 xD
Therefore I've never actually been in a romantic or sexual relationship, because the two times I would have been interested the other person wasn't. But those two people have been women and I'm starting to suspect I might only ever develop feelings like that for women. Who knows 🤷♂️ xD
I always called myself bi curious because I liked kissing guys and girls in school but once I met my ex husband I knew I preferred men sexually and that kissing women was as far as I cared to go sexually with them. 13 years later he and I divorced (he was a raging alcoholic, compulsive liar, etc) and I ended up becoming friends with a lesbian girl many years younger than me… of course kissing commenced on nights of partying, proceeded by my first full sexual experience with a female. she ended up falling for me and for 2 years begged me to be her girlfriend and although I loved her deeply, it wasn’t a romantic love and I just didn’t feel the same as her. I knew after that I just am not attracted to women that way and realized that the kissing never really turned me on but was still sexy and thrilling to me… just fun to watch the other person enjoy it. Interesting little coincidence I noticed…. You and Rich got together in November and ended in February….. same exact months for me and my ex-husband.
Ok I swear we’re on the same life road map here 😂
congratulations !
Thank you for this, you’re amazing 😊🏳️🌈