Hi everyone!! ヾ(＠＾▽＾＠)ﾉ I just wanted to hop in here and say, "WOW." Just absolutely, wow. I am in disbelief at how many of you actually watched this video. Not only that, but the *whole* 1+ hour thing!! The many extremely thoughtful comments from so many of you have me tearing up. I can't believe how much we all share in common through our feelings, our struggles (especially with self-doubt and anxiety!), and life experiences. I'm still working through responding to as many as I can, and I sincerely apologize if I am unable to respond to yours, but please be assured I have read each and every one. And each and everyone has brought a *huge* smile to my face. Some a laugh, and some an eye-brow raise...? (☉‿☉✿) Ahahahaha! Thank you all sososo much again for taking the time to listen to my story. I feel so connected to so many of you. I feel this overwhelming sense of warmth within my heart. And I feel this renewed sense of excitement to get going with this new comic project I've been dreaming of releasing. I'm crossing my fingers that the story I share through this comic will touch many of you in similar ways. And to those of you who are like me - getting up, and falling down, and getting up again to chase your creative dreams - I wish nothing but all the best to you on your journey!! It's not easy surviving as an artist in this world, but to those of you who are brave enough to keep getting up even when you get knocked down (and after taking a well-deserved break to recover, of course!), I commend you. And I believe that although you may not be making any money from the work you put out there, your work is priceless nonetheless. You are sharing a real part of yourself with the rest of the world - a part of you that is likely to touch and inspire someone unexpectedly. And how beautiful is the thought of that (｡◕ ‿ ◕｡) It's likely that you've already touched someone with your creative work! Try to think back and remember. It's so easy to disregard and sweep kind comments under the rug, especially in a world full of so much negativity and criticism. Just keep hold of all the memories of you have of reaching others with your art. Keep hold and let that continue to fuel your fire. (✿◕ ‿ ◕✿) Love, Riniapple
Loved the video, inspiring and relatable. Just a few ideas, hope it's ok. Have you considered selling signed prints of your illustrations, post cards, gift cards, calendars? And possibly producing a series of hand drawn versions of your most iconic works - stockpile them as your reputation increases, and sell them for an appropriately exclusive price. Your work is really good and you can definitely make a rewarding career out of it. Keep building your profile and RUclips channel and you'll have no problem selling your work. Just don't sell it too cheap - high prices are reassuring to art buyers. Good luck
I think a better way to put it, is that she did fail, but failing it's ok. Failing is part of the process. And that failing is not something that you are, it's something that you do to learn.
@@azzalan Nope. failure = not trying. Putting it your way gives a conclusion. the path is ongoing, it's a continuous process of discovery. the only ``failure`` is not trying = letting fear win, keeping you from your path
This is probably the riskiest move for anyone who's trying to make art as their career. Unless you have a lot of savings, it could work but still risky. I went to cons and asked professionals and I assumed making art was their only job but I was wrong. Some of them still have to keep their day job to support their art and only minority of freelancers are able to do it. This is pretty much the reality of pursuing art so dont fall for those "take a leap and chase your dreams" advices or videos that you see on Instagram or other social media. This doesnt only happen with art specifically but other creative careers as well like music. I'm not saying that you shouldn't do it but just be smart and really think about all the consequences and sacrifices that you need to make to take that "leap of faith". Lastly always dont forget to have fun while making art.
some other advice is to try to seek work that doesn't drain your mental energy. i wish when i was younger i had the mindset of try to find something stable that is p*ss easy for the way my brain works so that i can do art at home without feeling like i'm extremely tired at the end of the day. your comment is very realistic... you also have to consider why that is: that our culture simply isn't equipped to appreciate how much time and effort and passion go into making art. and thats why there isn't enough funding for it. so i guess i have two takeaways: maybe someone who likes making art could find a job in arts promotion/fund gathering, and that just cuz we live in a depressed society don't let everyone in your life whos obsessed with status etc. create guidelines that you as an artist move by.
@@isabellal2840 that is a really cool advice! I am going to try this out. I am looking for work to support myself while I write my book and I don't want to be a software engineer again while doing that. With engineering at the end of the work day I just wanted to go sleep.
@isabellal2840 This is why I work from home. Driving and dealing with people in an office drained me...I actually did less mentally draining work in office than now but because I have a lot more free time and don't have to be exhausted driving 2 hours round trip daily...it's so much easier.
Yeah most my friends are con-artists (haha) and they either have full time normal jobs or are... unemployed and just tried out this thing to see if it works for them, if not they keep on being jobless. Idk how tho because attending cons is SO expensive.... (and SO time consuming so idk how the full time peeps do it either). I'd love to be a con-artist too but I have neither time nor money to start...
The captain of a ship doesnt see the desired destination for 99% of the journey’s duration, and not for 1 second during that time does he think ‘I’ve failed’. You haven’t failed, you succeeded the moment you wanted this goal and set yourself on the path to achieve it, simply keep moving forward. You’ve succeeded.
To be honest as an artist myself I've noticed the ones that typically succeed in the long run, keep their day job and spend a few hours over months, years decades working on their craft after. Keep the source of income and dream alive until it's at a level ready to be professional, you can follow what you love but not have to worry about income for some time. This is as someone that's tried and failed over and over since I left foster care at 18, and has pursued art seriously all my life. I've also lived in complete poverty for many years while still studying and practicing relentlessly. This isn't something for the faint of heart.
Thing about it is can be VERY difficult doing your day job and building up your brand as a artist at the same time. Both require a lot of time that you can't finish all up in a day. I would know. Currently, im working on my art and building up my brand and it has been so very time consuming with a LOT of work involved. I'm busy literally 24/7 a day as you literally have to give that much time to it and more. Giving a few little hours a day won't really cut it with all that is cut out for you to do. Sadly, it ends up being that some have to put their passion on hold or even worst leave it to work in a day job they don't like to just pay their bills. I'm hoping to not be that way.
agree. saw this one Japanese artist show his day and it’s insane how he goes to a corporate job and comes home to work for HOURS on his manga. such dedication. my lazy self with ambitious dress could never 😭
@@star_light.g fr I saw a woman japenese artist doing the same, she got home, cooked because it was her turn she lived with her parents and brothers, drawed till exhaustion, sleep 4 hours, continued and then published it, manga is quite easy tho because it is black and white but still the passion, the ambition 🥲
i love the honesty of your storytime! we always hear of successful artists who make a living off their art,, but not much of those who weren't so lucky. thank you for this!!
The problem I see with a lot of success stories is that they don’t warn you about these possibilities but that’s cause they succeeded. I am proud of you for trying and please continue trying. Most scientists who won Nobel prizes failed for the first experiment to make a breakthrough. Resistance is important. Also many success strories don’t talk about diversifying your stream of income but just putting your eggs in one basket.
Agree, definitely important to set up multiple amounts of income you have for yourself coming in. Don't rely on just one source of income when working for yourself.
This is why I wanted to work in animation specifically; it was an art job that also happened to be a 9-5. But the job market is a mess for multiple industries right now, so I felt backed into a corner to try and start up a small business while at the same time trying to find a day job. But according to overall market trends, companies across the board aren't hiring at the moment. Even fast food and retail are increasingly more difficult to get into nowadays
As an artist, when people ask me for advice about becoming an artist this is my response. Only become a professional artist if you can’t be happy doing anything else. The financial uncertainty of being an artist is so hard. There is a reason the arts are full of people with either rich parents or have a partner with a good paying job. You need years of financial runway to give yourself the time to be successful. The overnight success stories are mostly fake. They are years in the making. The few that are true are extremely rare. I’m sorry you are struggling. I’ve been there. I’m close to being there much of the time. I’ve learned I can’t do a full time job and keep up with an art practice. When you feel ready next time maybe get a part time job while you’re also working on finding clients. But it’s also totally legitimate to just do it for yourself and not turn art making into a job. For a lot of people the money side ruins art. Good luck
This is so real 😭You and everyone else that has ever tried to pursue a career making art are *so* brave. I think so many of us have a beautiful creative spirit with a need to share our stories, and it's probably the hardest thing in the world to do, so it's nice to hear we're absolutely not alone. :) It's okay to try and fail, you will survive to try again some day. Don't give up, creative work feeds your soul, just like the 9-5 feeds your body. There is never shame in putting survival and mental health first.
i just finished up a two-year ux contract at riot and my first day without the job this month made me feel so free and full of hope. i felt so ready to become the person i've put on the backburner for so long. i have a small but mighty safety net, enough to keep me housed. i am totally open to failing but i just refuse to go back, i refuse to be golden handcuffed...if i'm going to take a salary job, i want it to at least interest me, and that's that! and if it doesn't interest me, i'll do other things for money! i'm trying my best to be determined. 27 is the youngest i'll ever be again so the second-best chance is now :') i love your art by the way!
I was thinking a few days ago about how “the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence”, so it’s interesting seeing your comment right now. So many artists dream of the Studio Job™️but is that what we’d really want? 🤔 We artists spend so long chasing the perceived legitimacy and validation that comes from that regular paycheck for your work but we artists are also pretty weird and offbeat…. Is clocking in to a cubicle - even at an art-based company - really for us..? (Maybe if the company is really small and allows for a lot of freedom..?) I’m really glad you’re free to make your own artistic vision come true now 🙂💓
Also interested, know many peoples’ dreams are to work in Riot’s concept art department and am wondering how it really is if you’re open to talking about it
@@jesterfeathers I honestly think there are fewer and fewer artists who actually want a studio job. Covid and tiktok got everyone thinking that freelance is a good idea when for most artists it's really really not. Clocking into cubicle in art job is the best thing an artist can do for their mental health and bank account to build a safety net they can let go later on and try to pursue some deep passion and come back again if or when it falls through. Also small companies are way worse bc there you are wearing many hats and almost inevitably have to overtime all the time. Artist are not whimsical creatures, we are human who need healthcare and structure and who are often preyed upon by social media selling pipe dreams. I'm not saying studio work is the only choice but it's something a lot of your artists scoff at right now and they end up burning out and working retail, which is way sadder.
Very similar story here too - dream to be an illustrator, get scared of the difficulty to make art your living, working soulless jobs, giving up, etc. But in my case AI was the nail in the coffin. Now I think that your passion should be a hobby, not the thing that your life depends on. It's just too much pressure. Also, if you make it your career, you can't just do whatever you want no more. You have clients, responsibilities, etc. That will bring down the enjoyment a lot. May even make you hate it. Art career is just too much of a gamble. But do NOT give art up. Work at your passion. No need to give it up. I too have an all or nothing personality. It's not good. Art as a hobby is fine too. Problem is having enough free time for hobbies of any kind. That's why I am trying to figure out how to make a living without sacrificing your time. That is the holy grail, not turning your hobby into work.
@@MsMvsc You are right, I have a weak character. But how can you also ignore the facts? Being strong and working hard towards something too risky is just not smart.
@@MsMvsc I already have an art job that I love, but changing my career it's been on my mind for the past year... Just cause I'm anxious AF for the future, and I've already been replaced by AI in some aspects of my work. I'm good at it, but the industry (generally) is greedy. (Still, I would never quit art as my hobby. I'm too passionate for that)
I don't agree due to the fact making art has always been a big passion of mine to pursue since I was a kid. Having already freelance experience, I've worked with over hundreds people doing work for them to build their vision and business and not once had any of those encounters made me grow out of interest for my love for art. Instead it grew my fondness of it more. I get satisfaction out of it. I was happy to share my gift in drawing to others to help pursue their own dreams. Imo, it really should be about sharing the gift you have to someone who does not posess what you have. Because let's face it there are not many people in the world that can actually draw. Its not a common thing. This is why they want to make AI be such a thing where anybody can use it and thus it make them 'feel' like such and such when they do. Although in reality a user using prompts to make AI generated images clearly does not make them be a skilled drawer or even an artist. Being good at drawing is a skill that requires you having certain traits and actual knowledge in art in order to achieve it. Many of us here can understand your concern of having art as a career not bring stabled, but what you have to also keep in mind is that the world is always changing with things like AI having made its grand entrance here, making lots of jobs unstabled. A lot of your every day jobs are becoming obsolete, people are being laid off every year, every month nowadays and it's in places they have worked in for years. It's already predicted that cable and movie theaters are going to be no need for in a few years (or even sooner) because people do streaming on their phone/TV and prefer it more. I look at economy news and hear about these things. It is a full blown reality. And if anybody in this year of 2024 and so forth, actually believe they are in a stable job or can find one, your greatly mistaken because the reality is NO job is actually stable out there anymore. It's not like how it use to be years ago. When Covid came, it did a whole 💯 of changing this world upside down and a lot known companies 'failed' and collasped cause of it, ones you wouldn't ever thought would have either. Again the world is always changing. The world is filled with uncertainty. Me solely pursuing after my art as a career does not make it out that I'm not being 'realistic', far from it actually, I'm aware of the failures and uncertainty that lies ahead of me in doing so. But again, everything in the world is like this nowadays. There are people sitting in their houses or places worrying over what will the next day bring to them here as how things in the world are always seemingly changing, no one can be too sure. I'm an optimistic realist, that means I can take the reality of things being bleak and opportunities being thin around me while still remaining hopeful for success throught it all. It is the attitude I have when pursuing art as a career now. You honestly shouldn't live in this world being afraid or afraid to take risks because it will majorly hold you back in life when you are like that. That's a fact, not a opinion. Overall, failures are a part of life, you should ultimately learn to embrace them and learn from them, not try to avoid them or run away from them. And that's just my two cents. I know it was long, but hey I'm very passionate about the topic. 😅
@@MsInteresting You are right about the risk taking. I am struggling with it (or I would have went hard on art before). Yeah, nowadays there is less stability in everything, but surely art is even more so? I don't really know how to overcome the fear of failure. I'm definitely making a mistake somewhere in my (subconscious) mental model, I just don't know where. "Everything is risky, so you might as well do art" is not enough for me somehow. But that's not all. Let's consider making some boring online business that saves you from wasting your time at a job. You can do art then too, but it won't be tied to your livelihood, so you can do whatever you want, whenever. Much less pressure, much more enjoyment. Surely this is smarter than going hard on a field that has high skill requirement and is very competitive, and then there is the AI too (which by itself is scary enough to make you quit). Also maybe I don't want to paint other people's ideas. That is a huge factor too. If you make art your career, you pretty much won't be able to make money with the worlds in YOUR mind. A couple of youtubers might be the exception, but don't expect oneself to be in the top 0.01%.
I am pretty much same as you. I followed my parent's advise to study bioengineering. Ever since then, it has been eating me out during my undergraduate studies and I barely passed. After I graduated, I took on a full-time job for about 3 years till now, and I am saving up for my leap of faith to start doing composing and music full-time. Please give me luck... I am very sad writing this, because I know I have a limited time on Earth and I sorta need.... NEED to get my songs out of my system and sorta give the universe my piece of contribution. Otherwise I feel very stuck. But now I have quite an amount of savings, I'm thinking of going to a laid-off place like Vietnam for several months and work solely on music. (All the while meeting with my other half) Yeah, thank you so much for making this video, it tells me that I am not alone in my quest. Yeah my parents are still not very supportive, but I don't care and I am tuning them out. I kinda sorta hate them, but you know they are getting old and asian have this mindset so yeah. Not caring about them anymore. Handling a job is already very respectful, and while doing it you do art too. It will definitely be a challenge. People always say do both until art takes off, but it's crazy ya know. It's not like a full-time job doesn't has it's own stress. I really hope you make it and be successful in your own way. Be at a status quo where you can say that you're satisfied with your standing and where you are, I guess that will be the best and what I will want for myself too.
dang. im no illustrator but i watched the entire thing, this feels like a parallel universe where you took path of going back to a job, while i took the path of dreams, in other words, unemployment (im on year 2). i'd like to assure you the grass is always greener as if you took the non job route like i am, you'd still have financial concerns like i do everyday thank you for sharing your experiences, it puts into perspective my decision and doubts, and this whole video resonated so much with me i feel less alone in my experience.
the thing is, you need a plan, a strategy, savings or at least a stable income UNTIL you are stable in your dream. That's the thing, you only failed once you have given up. If you figure out you don't want to actually pursue it, then alright, but if you still want to do it, you should always go for it. The road is not a a straight road, it's normal to have setbacks.
As someone who is 30, just learning to draw for the first time ever, and wants to pursue illustration as a career, this is probably the very last video I should watch...
Awe, I just want to give you the biggest hug right now ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥᷄⌓˂̣̣̥᷅ )‧º·˚ I really hope this video doesn't work to discourage you! And if it helps you feel any better, I am just about 30 myself! If anything, I hope my story shows you that self-doubt is the biggest obstacle when chasing your dreams. I think it's easy to see that if I had just stuck the course and trusted myself, I may have actually made something of all of the effort I started the journey off with. All I know is that this is going to be a long game and the only way to see things through to the finish line is to enjoy the journey and keep believing in myself the whole way. Although I may have fallen down once (or maybe a few times) I am choosing to get up again. And I will choose to keep getting up because I honestly don't think I can help myself. I just love making art too much ヾ(＠＾▽＾＠)ﾉ I wish nothing but success for you and hope you choose to keep pursuing your amazing dream (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ You can do it!! Seriously, you can!
Do NOT beat yourself up over this you adorable macaron of a person. You did nothing wrong. If there’s one thing humans are good at, its reaching for something they want bc everything be damned. And its chaotic, got its risks, struggles - but we’re not all knowing. Its the only way we get what we want. But we need to keep reaching or we’ll never grasp whatever it is we’re after. You took the first step and hardship towards the life you want, and its going to be yours bc this is YOUR journey. Also, i appreciate the truckstop compassion you’re giving by making vids like this as you continue your story.
I can really relate to this. My dream was also to be a children's book illustrator and then I ended up making comics. But there was a point where it was like, "What am I doing this for?" It lead me down a road of questioning why I was making art... was it for money, to be seen by others, self esteem? I definitely think depression is linked there because I felt seen and even if someone offered me a ton of money to make a kids book, I think my attitude would have prevented me from wanting it or enjoying it. It made me really dig deeper to as to what I had really hoped for with "making it" in my art practice. Part of it was community... wanting to be connected to others. Other things were fantastical... living in Japan and working with other illustrators. As I made friends with an illustration community in Japan and visited there, I found out they're facing the same struggles. It's just a superficial goal that doesn't lead anywhere. To me, it all boils down to how much are you enjoying and feel invested in your every day life, regardless of the art. The art is a practice, not a goal. When I hear your stories about the different jobs you do, I don't hear how your every day life is fulfilling. I think until we face head-on those issues, we won't find that passion for our practice.
This is a great comment. I realized my mistake was that I unconsciously placed "art" over "life". A little ironic and a strangely easy mistake to make. Thank you for sharing, this was incredibly helpful! I'll be thinking about this a lot.
sorry im a bit slow but what does art is a practice not a goal mean? and what if i enjoy art but can’t make much money from it then do I just keep trying?
@@estelle8757 goals are fine but also short-lived. Once you hit your goals, it’s easy to crash and lose momentum. And if you can’t hit your goals, you may feel defeated and give up. But when your art is a practice, something you do every day or so without expectations other than your own personal improvement, you’ll be more likely to continue working without the ups and downs disrupting you. You won’t be so precious with everything because you’re constantly making. It’s just like exercising… you do it because it makes you better and you’ll continue to get better from repetition and showing up.
@@estelle8757 I'm not sure it's the same for OP, but for me, it means that we do art for the sake of the process, not for what we hope to get out of the end product. I want to draw even if I don't have an audience. I still want to improve, but I will get enjoyment out of the practice regardless. Like living for living's sake
Love hearing other artists’ stories and I’m excited for your new work! After realizing that I preferred a job with routine, I decided to become a teacher so I could work on my art in the summers (and because I enjoy it). It was definitely the best decision for me but I still feel like a failure sometimes. I remember seeing the same Minnie Smalls video and being so inspired. It took me a long time and quitting posting my art online to remember that I started doing art because it was fun and meaningful to me, not just so I could post it. I admire full time artists but I have to remember why I chose my path. One day, I hope I can make a successful small and local art business to do part time but I don’t dream of going viral anymore.
I love hearing about your story as well!! What a brilliant choice in career, especially with the whole summer off to focus on your art! Honestly speaking, after scouring the web for the experiences of other practicing artists, I’m certain that the majority of them have some sort of supplemental income - whether it be teaching, part-time work, or a full-time job with art as a side project. You are certainly not a failure for doing so! (Even though it may feel like that at times. I totally understand 🥹) Amazing how one video touched so many of us! I’m glad we share Minnie Small’s inspirational video in common. I’m so glad you’ve found your way back to art and I’m so glad you’ve found a path that makes you feel comfortable enough to continue without feeling overwhelmed. I think that’s the most important thing when trying to trying to maintain a sustainable artistic practice 💕
Honestly? I wish I was you. I feel fantastic about my art but wish I was focused enough to complete 4 years of college for a special Ed teaching degree. I struggle with focus and motivation when it comes to college classes so I always end up dropping out and feel like a failure. Sometimes I wonder if the world mocks me or if it is teaching me something. When it comes to art I feel far more motivated and determined, but with work and careers I'm a sputtery mess 😂❤ I do send this with love that I don't think you're a failure; you're someone I'd look up to!
Thank you for sharing your story, I relate sooo much. I quit my secure job too for illustration and I expected not easy, but I didn't expect it to be quite this hard 😅. It's pretty heavy on my mental health and I am currently trying to find a part time job, so I don't feel like I am doing nothing, even though I know I work every day for it, but yeah. I understand why you felt the need to get back to that feeling of security. Your style is so so nice, I don't understand why people, especially those in the industry, tend to give out advice like "this is not what people prefer right now". I mean how do you know? Isn't it the point to be diverse? And there are 8 billion people on this planet and most of them are on the internet, so I can't believe all of us prefer the same style or whatever. Granted not all of them read comics, but I think each of us can have our own crowd. I am looking forward to following your journey 💕
Hii randomsquirrel!! Thank you so much for taking the time to watch my video and for sharing your experience! 🥲💕 It sounds like we've been through something very similar Isn't it funny how we don't consider work that we aren't being paid for "real work"? When really, that's not the case at all!! If anything, working on our art is the most honest work there is. I sincerely hope you're taking care of yourself and doing whatever you need to do to keep yourself happy and healthy. It's not easy jumping into something like this, so I don't blame you for seeking some sort of stability again. Honestly, if I could go back, I wish I would have chosen to return to a part-time job rather than full-time. It affords you some peace of mind while still offering plenty of time to work on your art! So, I think a return to part-time is an excellent decision (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ And thank you very much for your lovely comments about my art (> //
I loved hearing about you stepping outside your comfort zone at around 41:00. It was incredible watching your face light up to and reminds me that every time I step out of my comfort zone, it's scary at first but so so worth it in the end. It's just so tough stepping outside my bubble, UGHHH. Thank you for your amazing testimony. You are an incredible inspiration and I hope you find the success you are looking for.
I've never seen your channel, but your title totally caught my eye because that's EXACTLY what I went through too. Around 1:02:00, I realized that the things I loved to do don't make enough money, and art is REALLY REALLY REALLY competitive. In my art classes, very few people MADE it. But I love doing art. I keep drawing, sketching, and doodling a lot. Like you mentioned, creativity and artwork don't have to go away; they'll come through in other ways. It's not so much about finding a 'job that you love and you'll never work again' but more about finding a job that pays well and you can tolerate. The key word is tolerate.
Leaving is one thing but admitting your failures all out in the open takes an immense amount of courage. Youre brave and thank you for this, i learnt so much.
I can relate to this - always wanted to pursue art but never had an 'in' - there were years I would forget about it and then passionately reconnect with it. For me I think it helps to find inspiration and pursue it without thinking too much about the money otherwise it is too much pressure. It depends on the situation but I find it easier to stay dedicated to making art when I'm not trying to get anything out of it. If you're a full time artist i guess it is a different story.
Hello riniapple! I just stumbled upon this vid while I was making my merch for an upcoming con, its been about a month or so since I was laid off from my corpo job and decided to take a leap of faith with my art and started working on my art merch business. your story has been so inspiring, not only because of the achievements you've accomplished but because the struggles and fear you had doing all this, reminded me so much of everything I've been going thru myself. I wish to continue my art career and not fall back into the corpo job space, but hearing your story its been eye opening that if I do get to the point I have to look for a new job, you reminded me that I am not a failure. that I can pursue art again when I feel like it. or that I can do both with a healthy balance. you've reassured me that I can still be an artist. thank you for sharing your story and experience, I wish you the best riniapple!!
Hii paositive ヽ(；▽；)ノ💕Reading this made me feel so happy! I’m so glad my story helped you realize that you are not a failure despite the setbacks you’ve faced. As long as you chose to keep getting up, you are still on your way to achieving your dreams 🥹And yes, you certainly can still be an artist - always ❤️
Thanks for sharing your story, I have a lot of feelings on this topic, and I appreciate your perspective. It's really difficult to monetize art. Whether you're self employed or going from contract to contract, it comes at a steep cost: changing your art to suit the market or the client, spending most of your time on business management, the stress of feast and famine. I've been self employed for 10 years now and I'm honestly exhausted. The last few years have been so hard, I've gotten into debt to try to tough it out. For a long time I loved it. I was a workaholic and thought I thrived on the excitement of it, but in the end, it was unsustainable both financially and emotionally. In an ideal world, people would be able to devote themselves to art and other worthwhile pursuits without worrying about financial survival, but we live in this world, so we do the best we can with the choices we have. From where I sit, that's exactly what you've been doing :)
I resonated with your experience, especially the part where you talked about feeling like you were drifting in the ocean with no purpose, giving up on the dream you were chasing or wanting most of your life would be like giving up a part of yourself, a big part. Thank you for sharing your story with us.
It is so commendable that you tried, and you have not failed, you have grown and learnt! You’re also really adorable and likeable even through the wonders of RUclips. Please make more videos, the world needs your expertise and experience. ❤
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am an online art teacher, but I've been sharing my art journey on RUclips for over 4 years now. I can understand the struggle of trying to "make it as an artist". I'm learning so much every day, but it does take a lot of time and effort, but, in my opinion, perservence is key. I've just come to realize that I'd still be doing this even if no one was watching. It's my hobby and it means something to me and I'm trying to go after my dream and that makes it worth it. I wish you happiness and success and I look forward to seeing where your art journey takes you.
Dear Rini, As a 25yr old, your whole video is so relatable & relevant in my current circumstance! You didn't give up on your dreams as you're still here & have inspired 2.11k+ subs & 15k+ viewers--- other people(imagining that many people gathered in a room is impressive!) along the way who are here with you now to follow you in your creative endeavors. CONGRATS! Keep up the grit---daily, weekly, monthly, yearly---& beyond---a lifetime! From start to end listening to you I could feel & see your soul, character, & self-compassion developing. You are not alone in the life long wrestle with uncertainty as that is exactly the mark of a true artist & you've survived to continue telling your story. Thank you for courageously sharing it as you've given me & countless others further encouragement & personal reassurance in our own creative paths as a fellow artists. It would be cool to work on something with you, maybe a podcast, in the future if possible haha! 😆🙌❤🔥🕊✨ Much love, Cheers!
I feel that we put so much pressure on earning money through art that we tend to forget to enjoy the creation process. Maybe it is a good option to have a supporting job that lets you have free time to create and enjoy the art that feeds your soul. Also the freedom to create whatever is in your mind without the need to conform anyone for money sounds pretty good. Like you said, it's not all black and white. Thank you for opening to us with so much honesty. I'm sure your story will help many people. This made me dive into thinking, I'll see where that leads me. 🥰
I don't think anyone can tell you that you did it wrong ultimately you just did what was right for you depending on the situation. But I want to say to everyone in regards to the anxiety if you're anxiety prone you need to trick it. Anxiety hates taking risks, keeping the risks at minimum is easier for reaching goals. For example instead of quitting cold turkey, cutting down your hours instead as you gain more work, or temping every few months or going back to education, taking a career break if that is accessible to you, condensing your hours...It's a bit longer this way but it could help manage the anxiety so it doesn't stop you completely from doing what you want to do. There's probably some other options but this is all I can think of. My anxiety would never have let me quit the unfulfilling job to pursue my dream so I've had to find other ways.
Ahh!! Thank you so much for watching so far in Anjuliiii ＼(T▽T)／ I debated editing all of the "umms" and "ahhs" out, but I wanted it to feel like a sit down with a good friend. I'm glad you enjoy the format!! 🥰
Even if this did not go to plan, I am sure that when you are old you will not regret this leap of faith. Later in life nobody wishes that they had spent more time working and less time following their dreams.
Your work and style is absolutely gorgeous! It's just a matter of getting it in front of the right eyeballs, and that unfortunately IS a numbers game with a fair amount of luck as well. Sounds like you're in a much better headspace at this point which is so important, and I do not doubt for a SECOND that you will get the opportunity to share you work with many, many more people. Keep at it, and thanks for sharing your story.
Going after one’s dream is always a win and such a journey can’t ever be just a straight road from a to b, because there’s growth that needs to happen along the way. It’s all love and as long as there are people like you, I have love for humanity.
Yes, create to express yourself. Just like this video is self expression, this is your art, live. You can include your toons and anything else in your videos and posts.
my goodness! this is so hard. I quit my job at Apple in October of last year and YES i am on this journey of self doubt and fear, the almost recoiling and trying to figure out HOW... "how am i gonna make any money!?!?" That 6 month checkpoint is such a big moment where you feel like you can "make it or break it" Especially as you start digging into your savings and you watch it dwindle. BUT i loved your really heavy shares about an hour in and im so glad your are back. I tried to be an artist in the way that the "art world" and my art school expected me to, now im taking a completely different approach and it feels so fulfilling! SO SO SO excited to see what you do coming back to yourself and your creativity again after leaving. 💕
This is so sincere and heartfelt. As someone working towards being a full-time artist after some time away from it, it's so comforting hearing you share your realistic experiences
As someone who also struggles balancing my 9 to 5 with making art and trying to find my place in the illustration world, thanks for sharing. I also stopped making art for some years and it has been difficult to restart that spark.
its very brave of you to jump into an industry that you werent specifically prepared for in college and perfect your skills regardless and relentlessly follow your dreams despite all that anxiety (not to mean that in a way that you were ignorant and jumped into things without properly being aware because i believe that you gotta start somewhere if youre serious about fulfilling ur hopes). i definitely think stuff is gonna work out for you in terms of ur artistic career so dont give up on social media and art !!!
You are indeed super brave! I am so glad you found your own way to follow your passion! You definitely didn’t fail, or, if you will, you failed the “artist way”: you realised what wasn’t working and changed it, as opposed to completely giving up due to frustration. That’s failing successfully 👌
Its the uncertainty that weighs on us which makes us question ourselves daily. "Failure" is an opportunity for growth. ironically I just started doing art and learning anything i can to improve. The thing i say to people that asks "what should they do?" I usually tell them to go find themselves - really look into what youre really passionate about. It seems like you have a true passion in art which is amazing but the weight of uncertanty is preventing you from doing your best. Dont let uncertainty stop you. With risk comes reward. I am currently looking for a full time job right now and while i wait for a response (hopefully very soon) I want to continue learning art.
Hi from a fellow Canadian! So much of your story resonates me with me, especially the black and white thinking. I left my job about a year and a half ago, originally giving myself 6 months to just chill out. I didn't originally leave to focus on trying to make illustration a career, but I ended up figuring out that that was my longer term goal. I don't know if I would've figured that out if I hadn't taken some proper time off work. I'm starting to apply to regular 9-5 jobs now and have found myself slipping into that all-or-nothing thinking -- completely putting off drawing or reaching out to illustration-related people for long periods of time 'cause I feel like I can only concentrate on one thing at a time. I hope if I do get a regular job, that I can still find the energy to make art outside of work and keep chipping away at the larger goal. I'm hoping that identifying the goal is the first big piece of the puzzle and at least now I have a better idea of why I'm working in the first place (for stability while I work towards this goal!). So glad to hear at the end of your story that you're making art again. I hope we can all find the right balance of creative fulfillment and not having to worry about money lol!
I totally stumbled upon this video and think it was meant to be cause it really resonated. This is a really hard topic to even say out loud and share so I commend you for it. Showing that vulnerability and being real in a way is refreshing. I'm going through something similar and the financial burden of everything really does weigh heavy. It feels like it takes every ounce of energy to just do anything creative with that burden hanging over. Its sad that as creatives we are forced to choose between what brings us joy versus what we have to do to survive. (Even at the cost of us turning our art into money) That being said, its great that you still have a joy and love for illustration and storytelling. That's something that will always be with you and that year that you stepped away was healing you needed (Especially after powering through your portfolio) Glad to hear you won't give up--your art reaches people and I'm sure has inspired someone to pursue their own creative journey! I look forward to seeing your creative journey in the future!! You got this!!
As an aspiring writer, I do appericate creatives who are transparent about their story, and it takes a lot of courage to take the risk. It's awesome to hear that you aren't giving up on your artist dreams. Can't wait for the next chapter in your journey 😊
You tried, and that's more than most people will ever muster up. It's not a failure, it's an experience and you will never regret what you've accomplished!
As someone who's reaching the crossroads of deciding what I want to do for a career after school, this video is so comforting. I relate so much to your connection with art since I've always been obsessed with stories, illustrations, animations etc. and am now wanting to write and share stories through comics. I always decided as a kid that I wanted to do something creative. Yet now that I'm older and reality seems closer than ever, I'm scared of regretting either doing art or not doing it. It's comforting to watch a video about the hardships that come with art and even more so the mental difficulties. Just the idea of giving up something that I've worked so hard all of these years to maintain and the one dream I've held onto for hope has really made me feel depressed. Your video just makes me feel so understood. Thank you for sharing
the similarity i share with your story is wild. Even down to the month and year I left my 9-5 with a similar plan and circumstance with my partner and savings to pursue my dreams. What I found interesting was that my story went very much the same. The first year or so I loved it, but soon enough it became hard to do the things I loved because of the worries about the longevity of the lifestyle and when I would start making money again. Eventually I realized I too would be better off getting a 9-5 again.. to allow myself some peace of mind while I continue to pursue the projects I started. So far, I'm at the finding a 9-5 job part of my journey again and hoping it comes with that sense of relief you talked about as well as the balance I need to continue my projects. I can't thank you enough for sharing your story, as its felt incredibly validating of what I've been feeling the past two years of this wild journey.
You never ever gave up on the dream. You let go of the pressure. You are amazing for sharing this and I can relate so much! 🙏 I am always afraid to talk about it, but this helped me to process what happened for me. Thank you!
You are very brave for making this video and of course for trying to pursue your passion, most people don't even get to the point of trying! It's a tough career to break into and comics is some of THE toughest, along with animation. I very much relate to your story, my parents also pushed me into a "safer" career and I ended up getting 3 unrelated degrees before I've decided to give it a try after all in my late 20s and got my first art job at a game studio. I loved it but it was an entry job with a very small wage so I've tried going freelance for over a year and failed to make it a sustainable career even though by that time I was drawing for 10 years and had pretty good skills but not a great portfolio or idea what I want to do. I've also spiraled down into a pretty bad depression (and it was in the middle of covid too). But then I've managed to get a good game studio job and even though it wasn't anything particularly fun, to draw all day and be off and free by 6 and to get a VERY nice paycheck for all of that fixed my mental (and physical) health and helped me improve my skills. After two years opportunity presented itself to pivot to the job with smaller pay but the one I was more passionate about (book cover illustration!) but I was cautious this time and worked both for a couple of months. Not sure I recommend that but I was determined to feel it out before the jump this time and then I did jump. Been working with the same company for 2 years now and overall pretty happy! I don't know if everyone could or should be going the same route I did but now I'm very passionate about discouraging artists from taking risky leaps because I've seen SO many people burn out completely and abandoning art forever. It takes strategic thinking and some luck for those who want to do it full-time, it's absolutely possible. But of course to keep it just as a creative outlet is also a valid way to go! One thing I want to advice you please NEVER sign up to Originals. It's the way for them to exploit unexperienced artists and not worth it at all. RUclips and slow and steady rise of your audience is a much healthier way to go about it! I wish you best of luck in your journey!
Hi Kateryna!! o(^▽^)o Thank you so much for taking the time to watch my video and leave such a thoughtful comment ❤ I agree that the comics industry is probably one of the toughest illustration industries to break into x_x;; Despite that, I can’t help but be intensely drawn to this medium. Although I may never make a living from it (or any income at all), I will continue to make comics for the pure joy of it nonetheless (о´∀`о) It sounds like you’ve had quite the journey!! That’s amazing that you were able to complete three degrees in subjects you weren’t all that interested in :o that takes some *serious* self discipline!! I’m glad you were able to find something you enjoy for work and I think it’s wonderful that you’d like to share your hardships with other aspiring artists to give them more realistic expectations and to help save them from the all too common burn out that comes with exerting yourself too hard to pursue your passion. Also!! Thank you for the warning about Originals! I’ve heard similar things and agree that if the opportunity ever does present itself, it’d probably be wiser to maintain control of my work and continue building up my own following ❤
Going through a similar period of anxiety at the moment and trying to fight through it, so I really feel what you are talking about. You have my biggest respect for everything you did and how you're finding your way through. I don't see any failure there at all. I just see someone with a lot of courage to figure out what is acutally working for yourself. And I think this is just the beginning of a great story that you're gonna tell. Just keep on doing what truly makes you happy:)
First of all, I want to thank you for taking the courage to sit in front of a camera and tell your experience. For introverts, this is really difficult, so I really appreciate it. I feel very identified with everything you have experienced. I am at a point in my life where I could consider that I already know how to draw to "sell" but still not enough to make a living from it. It is quite frustrating at times, and having to think about that "tug of war" in which you enter a "normal" job and then return to your projects, again and again, is truly exhausting. I never had the opportunity to go to a university and live the experience of learning to do that type of work with colleagues and receive that feedback, I have simply been myself. I see many of my colleagues on the internet come and go, all trying to make a living from what we love (illustration) but it is certainly very overwhelming to see incredible artists having to put their projects aside, for one, two, or several years... It is inevitable to feel that concern, and I do not want to be negative, I just feel that it is nice to be able to empathize with other artists knowing that many of us are going through the same thing! Even so, we all know that there will be nothing in the world that fulfills us more than illustrating, honestly all the depression, bad days, stress, go away when I see art, I create art, when I see someone like you Riniapple, it honestly fills me with life and hope, and that is why I get up every day, to be able to touch people's feelings just like you did with us! Thank you for making art, thank you for feeling, thank you for being so genuine and so real.♡
Hii Shiro!! You’re so very welcome ヽ(；▽；)ノ💕 Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to my story. I’m so glad you were able to resonate with my experiences in so many ways. I absolutely agree with you when you say that being an artist is such a difficult thing in this world. It’s even harder to see artists you love be crushed by all the pressures of society 😞 But just as you’ve said, for many of us creatives, there is nothing other than art that has the ability to replenish our souls. And so we continue to create despite what others say and despite all odds ❤️ Thank you so much again! Wishing you all the best in your own creative pursuits!
I am an artist/illustrator with dreams, and I am very grateful to you for sharing your story. Don’t give up; your art is amazing, and I know you will go far. You are very brave, and this video has inspired me a lot. I also dream of dedicating myself to art, but sometimes life doesn't go that way. I am 29 years old and have tried several times to pursue art. I won’t give up because it’s something I love, and I would like to live a life where I can dedicate myself to something that makes me happy. I just moved to Canada and left everything behind... my family, my friends, my home. But I brought my dream of being an artist with me in my suitcase :) At the moment, I am not working until I can get my work permit, so I want to take advantage of this time to become a better artist and pursue my dreams. I would really like to get involved and be in touch with the artist community in Canada. It would be nice to make new friends, share our art, and our passion for art. I hope the best for you and your future! 🥰 Thank you for making this video
YOUR ART IS AMAZING. LIKE LITERALLY WHEN I SAW FOLLOW YOUR ART I CRIED (IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL), AND YOUR OTHER WORK IS NO WORSE. I LOVE HOW YOU CAN DO SO MANY DIFFERENT STYLES. I HOPE YOU MAKE LONGER WEBTOONS IN THE FUTURE AND GET A GOOD MARKETING AGENCY. I BET YOULL HAVE NO ISSUES GETTING MORE FANS AND PERHAPS PERUSING YOUR DREAM.
Ahh (⋈◍＞◡＜◍)。✧♡ Thank you so much starlight!! (; _ ;) That literally makes me so happy to hear. Yes! I fully intend for my next Webtoon project to be long-term and my hope is to have it published as a book one day (∩˃o˂∩)♡ Thank you so much again for your comment and support
I’m 31 and going into the art career world and it’s something I wish I would have done sooner than later for sure. But as an older person I feel more confident in what I wanna produce and the future comics that I’m going to publish one day is something for me and other (whomever they are )to enjoy and that’s the best I can hope for ❤
hey thanks for making this. i just graduated and have been sitting at home with no goal or path in mind since i'm also uninterested in further pursuing my major. i find myself feeling a deep sense of purposelessness due to the lack of direction and similar pressures from family. either way, i know i want to become independent, and i need to take a step for that to happen and just figure it out from there. hearing about your good job experiences was sweet and i appreciate you recounting this time in your life :)
I really resonated with your feeling of drifting in the middle of the ocean and not knowing where to go or swim. I have also been trying for so long to break into the illustration industry. I'm probably more frustrated by the fact that I put myself into so much debt, and well, there's nothing to show. I also feel re-ignited sometimes by new project ideas, but a lot of my old ideas - I feel like I'm forgetting them. And quite frankly, at 35, I'm about ready to put it all down. I felt such sadness, I've not processed it yet, tbh, and kind of just realized, I want to go to therapy....
This is such wisdom that you are sharing, and everyone who has thought about taking a similar path to this NEEDS to hear your story, especially young people who aren't sure what to pursue as a college major/career I'm not an illustrator, but definitely adjacent to that, as a motion gfx artist. I went to design school, and I'm very thankful to be using my degree. But if I was starting over, I definitely would've considered going into a career that wasn't art/design related, for similar concerns of employment opportunities. There are pros and cons to the job, and what you said about feeling like you HAD to make a career out of it to be successful is what many people likely feel. For anyone thinking of going into art/design, know this: unless you're fully self employed, you won't get to create all the art you want 100%- when working with clients, you are ultimately catering to THEIR vision. And that can get frustrating. For those thinking of quitting, really reconsider if you don't have a game plan...and I'd say try to make use of your PTO if possible to take days off to focus on art!
Thank you so much for this video! I'm someone who has constant self doubt because of my age, still living with my parents, not having a job and wanting to persue a career as an artist/writer/game developer (I guess creator would be a better term haha), so your video was really inspiring and even informative for me! It answered questions I never found the answer for, it made me a little more determined, even if my conditions are so limiting... So yeah, I just wanna thank you a bunch!
I accidentally came across your video and realized that I am currently in a similar situation. Your words are exactly what I really needed to hear, thank you))💙
Gosh dang. I'm 30 minutes in and I am hanging onto your words.. a lot of the highlights you share ring similar. I won't bit by bit compare... but I was always praised for my art as a child, and as a late diagnosed ADHD a lot of insecurity and overthinking has lived in me. Always loved to create, loved animation. But I've struggled a lot, and going for art felt like an impossibility to live on given the human being (creature?) that I was. I went for anything else, had over 20 different jobs. As a caregiver, I hurt myself during the pandemic and post-pan, I went from working 100+ hours a week to barely being able to deal with 30. More drama, mental health, scary stuff- I know we all went through our own thing. I left my most recent job six months ago with huge burnout. with the support of my partner, and as we speak, I am at the very beginning of an illustration-as-earning-a-living journey. I trust that I want it, and am hopeful.. but damn is it scary. I have little savings. 😅 But I'm very grateful to have this time to figure things out.
Cool to find someone with same feeling and that emptyness and depression with good jobs making money and being stable. I quit drawing for 1 year as well just working, but I was getting that feeling as well. I got so frustrated and depressed that I didn't even wanted to grab a pen. I'm still fighting against it, but you got further that I got. This year I worked again and took a pen without a bad feeling. When I say you got further, it because you fought, and you shared your art, and worked a lot, I worked a lot but all is just a memory now. Keep working, don't give up, not as I did. I still procrastinating a lot due to my bad experience with art, but maybe one day I will get that spark you got that made you move :3
I am inspired, you're so brave for sharing this. Thank you for pep talking me into staying in the middle. I also have a tendency to go all out or none at all. Balance is the key
I am a musician who works full time and makes music by night. I was always too scared to pursue music as a career, as I was pretty sure it just wouldn't be commercially viable for me. But in doing that, I have found that in some ways it's the best of both worlds. I get to work on something I find creatively and existentially fulfilling (music) but it doesn't have to be a make or break, sink or swim source of income, as I support myself in other ways (my boring 9-5). But through that I've been able to pursue really fun little experiments that I don't know if I ever would have let myself dedicate time to if I needed projects to put food on the table. I've made tons of friends through collaborating with other artists on little hobby projects online; there can be a lot of perks to the approach you're taking. And who knows, in the future as things develop and you get your name and work out there more, opportunities may present themselves and perhaps your art can be an additional source of income, enough that you can transition into part-time work, or even leave behind your job all together again. There is certainly a spectrum to existing as an artist online.
I have never related to any video more in my life. This is the exact journey I've been on from start to finish. I'm currently at the point in my journey where I'm trying to quit my 9-5 job to pursue art, but I’ve been putting it off because of the exact insecurities you described with the possibility of regrets and financial instability. But I still have the tiny voice telling me to pursue my art and my passion. I've gotten to the point where I have so much anxiety about pursuing art as a career that I haven't drawn for years now, but I recognize I'm giving up my dream without even trying.. I very much so have the all or nothing, black or white thought process as well which isn't helpful :') I hope I can find the same middle ground as you to pursue art for the love of creation, but I feel like I'm a long way away. You are super brave to push past your anxieties and move forward ❤ I really hope this next part in your journey fulfills your artistic passion
I've been following you for 6 years and had no idea you were struggling with the same things that I have been. I'm so happy and proud of you for making it this far and pursuing art and your dreams once again. You're a huge inspiration to me. Thank you for sharing your story :D
It happened to me exactly the same as you, this was really helpful and you are so brave and kind, thank you for sharing your story. I cried with you during the video. I remember saying the same words to my psychologist. "i quit my dreams, i losing the light that had guided me since childhood" and finding myself in that ocean lost and without support. I am also happy to know that your friends supported you and you have a very nice space to do art. I would like to be able to live alone one day, that is a great relief since you do not owe anything to anyone except yourself and your dog hehe but other younger people demand that we generate income or study something else at the university, because we are at their house, so it is not easy, besides in my country we have ugly and tiny, dark rooms (at least mine is like that jaja ) your room is beautiful and I bet it motivates you to create, it goes a lot with your style (you art is beautifull) and your desk is healthy for your back, what you can be most happy about is knowing that now you will not be exploited by a company that will make you draw whatever they one quickly and badly. You will create true art in your own style and desire. Creative freedom is also a gift that professionals do not have because they are told to do things they do not like in very short periods of time where they have to stay up all night every day to finish or stay in the office long hours for free, is stressful.In general artists are not valued, so don't feel like it's your fault, you are an artist for what you know how to do, not for whether they hire you to do what they want. You do your art freely and I assure you that many of us will connect with it.
I felt very touched by your story. Just like you, I was really drawn to art since I was a child- I felt comfort in it, but I always felt I was not for it. Even when I practiced and started a degree, I gave up and sometimes I feel I did it too easily. Your work is wholesome, you should keep trying even if you sometimes feel uncertain. Believe me, I understand you in a deep level and you almost brought me to tears, but you are talented- even if it's hard for you to believe it right now, keep trying. Send your portafolio. I'm sure you'll be able to achive your dream.
you can still have a stable full-time job while chasing your dream on the side. Don't put al your eggs in one basket. learn tio prioritize and manage your time...and you can do both.
this is the longest video I have watched on youtube I guess and it was worth every second. I am soooooo thankful for your honest words and sharing your true story. thank you so so so much. you are such an inspiring person and a very lovely artist I just discovered your channel and now insta too because of my youtube algorithm. I am very happy and I wish you sooo much sunshine and love. ♥ you are doing great. you are on your right path. and I am so in love with your characters. they are so lovely.
I think a lot of people can relate to this - have gone through or will go through something similar. I went through a different story, but ended up at pretty much the same conclusion, about taking things as they come. Like you, I'm also back to an inspired point in my life now, but with it still lingers a sense a fear... because of getting hurt by my own unrealistic expectations in the past. I'm fearful I'm still the same naive person, just in a different way? Worrying that there's something I'm not seeing right now, and this peaceful time will also crash. It's very touch and go, with cycles of confidence and doubt/loss. Beyond art, a lot of things happened that changed my attitude about life, and consequentially what I want from art. Sometimes I believe I've "wised up" and have finally learned how to just be okay with everything, and sometimes I worry I'll regret this time in the future too. Maybe the real answer is that this uncertainty is permanent. I'm seeing similar quarter- or mid-life "crisis" experiences from my non-artist friends and their professional careers as well. But I think it affects artists/musicians or anyone with a "passion project" the most, because those passions just take so much time, effort... and emotional investment. Anyways it looks like we're probably going to go through the next phase together, of whatever this is 😂 Thanks for the video, it helped me do some self-reflection. It also helped me get out of one of my "lost" cycles, and I have some new answers for myself. So thank you, it was truly meaningful to me 🙂
This has been soooooo healing to listen to! I first started trying to do my own thing in 2020 and had very similar doubts, always running back to a job and trying again. I can understand the struggle so I am routing for you! You've got this, believe in yourself and your talent and know you have your own back!
Thank you so much mariah!! ヽ(；▽；)ノ💕 You’re actually the sweetest! Thank you for believing in me and thank you for your support 🥺❤️ It’s a tough thing - chasing your creative dreams with self-doubt and financial insecurity constantly looming over. I completely understand running back to a job when things get really uncertain (x_x;;) But at the end of the day, all that matters is that we get back up and keep trying!! ٩( 'ω' )و Wishing you all the best on your journey!!
Omg, this was like listening to my own story! 😮 Except that I worked as a freelance artist for ten years and then had to quit due to mental exhaustion. I took my first "normal" job in years last year and felt a huge relief after that. I lost my Northern star in life (the dream of being a full-time artist) and I don't really draw anymore but I hope I will find the spark again. I want to make art just for the self-indulgence as well. No pressure to succeed, just to have the luxury of being able to create. 🙂 Thank you for making this video! I think it's important to hear all kinds of stories and this definitely comforted me a lot. ❤
Your art is absolutely gorgeous, down to the perspective to the quiet, comfy way you illustrate things. I resonate greatly with you as I similarly left to pursue children's graphic novel work after art school, but found that environment had burned me out. I did freelancing for a while but it gave me the same anxiety you described, and got a stable job at an art agency thinking I would be better off with stability, but realized doing art for someone else was really hurting me. I recently got part time work at a retail job and started doing art more for me and I am far better emotionally than I have been since I left school eight years ago balancing the two. They say if you love what you do you will never work a day in your life, but in my experience its far better to leave what you love to things you are passionate about and be kind to your creative soul. I really wish you the best of luck with your comic cause I read and really resonate with your first one--its such a shame that editor discouraged you cause it really is quite special. I don't comment this much on things but your journey really got to me haha
I think it's heartbreaking that we live in this world where an artist as skilled, passionate and hard-working as yourself struggled so much to get paid for their work. I think you've reached a really good mindset now though and it's really inspiring!
Congratulations on finding a path that works better for you! It can be hard to take risks, especially when you tend to get very anxious. But it sounds like you took that experience, have grown from it and are continuing to grow now. I wish you the best!
I was waiting for you to get to the part where you failed but it never came 🥺 I don't know if you chose this title for virality but I'd say your experience was a testament to your bravery and passion for art, not a failure at all!! Just give it more time and I'm sure you'll find more opportunities for your creative talents! You're inspiring and gave me a sense of peace for my own pursuit of my dreams
Hey, I’m from Brazil and this one is probably my first time commenting on any video, but I just felt the need to say that sharing your journey this way is so courageous and inspiring at the same time! In my country art is really hard to pursue, it’s most commonly seen only as a hobby and nothing professional, probably not so different from other countries I guess.. but I’m still gonna try doing it, cuz experience and the courage to give the first step is something else! I’m rooting for your success 🎉
It could take you to a different country or city that would support your dreams more :) many cities in the world have more money to give to the arts. I hope you find those cities ❤
Hi! I just honestly did the same thing as you just a few months ago, and I'm scared but also excited to finally pursue illustration again. It's so nice to see a kindred spirit. ;-; I've been quite hard on myself recently, but this video just gave me the boost and kick I needed to tough it out! Thank you so much. You didn't fail, you're brave and you're doing what it takes to pursue your dreams.
I know how you feel when you said you come home with little motivation to draw. After a long day at work staring at a computer all day its hard to find that inspiration. A lot of that has to do with the pressure to succeed as well. Have you considered a sidecareer in selling your works at conventions? They're usually on the weekend so it may provide a nice balance.
It’s okay I’m kind of in the same boat but barely started up my business. I had good savings to pursue my business but a series of unfortunate events happened to where I couldn’t work on my business enough and then the savings are running dry. Back to a 9-5 grind now. I realized what I did was smart (having good savings before quitting my old job), but in all honesty I couldn’t have foreseen certain things - like a parent getting cancer… As long as you learned skills along the way that helped you grow, it’s going be okay. I finally understand the saying, ‘The experience is the journey’. Hope you realize such now too. And I’m still pursuing my business idea, but yeah on the side now too. Women in business we got this! 💪
I love your content. I just started practicing illustration a few weeks back, just to find my human side by myself after getting bombarded by AI content, my workplace forcing me to use AI to survive...made me feel so lost..so i started a new project - i illustrate a Pride and Prejudice book from scratch. Make it the way *I* like without letting AI and tech giants dictating what I should and shouldn't do.
I saw this video twice. I am in the same boat as you, except that I am a writer. I havent left my job, but I only work part-time. The rest of my time I try to devote to my hobbies and passion but there is always the spectre that something may happen and that I need to find more work. Im not there yet but your story was very inspiring to me and is one of the best videos I have seen on RUclips. I feel like I have a lot to say. First of all, I think the messages you recieved from your parents got to you. They may have meant well but they are not an illustrator like you. You see the world uniquely and have stories to tell, a light in you that wants to come out. This is very special and needs to be nurtured. Like a seed it needs to grow. And the way you do that is with love. I saw your comics and they are really really good. You have ant style that is just pleasant to look at. I love your character designs and the attention to detail you put in your drawings. I just think that you need some crazy goal like doing 100 comics throughout your life or something like that. For sure then you would be making money. But yeah its a love and like being in love, when separated from it, life is less than life. Your really good, I think you'll be fine.
We love success stories. They inspire people to work towards their dreams. But how about the people that didn't succeed? Thank you for sharing your life experience. It inspired me, and I wanna share my life experience to the void of internet too. Maybe I'll also make a video some day. I'm an older dude that gave up my dreams of drawing, and animation because of financial struggles. Now, I'm trying to pursue my dreams again in my own ways. Just knowing I'm not the only one is inspiring in its own way.
you have a lovely voice, it was very nice to hear your story while working. I identify with a lot you said, adding the pressure to make an income, specially a first source of income, to art, is so taxing for the process. I don’t think you failed, you tried it and realized it was not for you, and now you have a stable job that gives you a fixed income to be free to explore the art in the way however you want ❤ thank you so much for sharing!
That's one of the most important videos and comment session I've ever seen. Thank you so much for sharing ❤ I hope everything goes well for you, that you be happy, healthy and feel you're not alone 🤗
As a full time freelance illustrator for 4 years, it’s easier to make money by drawing what others want, like commissions and fanarts - which can be a sacrifice of ‘not drawing what you 100% want’ but can still be fun and great learning experiences! Original art is harder to gain interest but possible in ways like Patreon and Ko-fi. So I still feel like my original art is a side job 🤭 Definitely still always feel insecure even 4 years in 🫣
Not having a Plan is a big step to failure, Plans are always important, you need to investigate, search for the right decision and apply it step by step, maybe you should considerate looking for a illustrator job? This could work in the meantime you make your comic and you can learn a lot about how's illustration and comic market, yes! Investigate about these 2 markets Ilustration and comic and do it until you accomplish been a great Illustrator and a Great Comic creator! I wish you success and I give you strength to this Marvelous trip called been an Artist! 🌟
My first "all in" at a dream ended up flopping. It was disheartening when didn't go as I hoped. However my life needed structure so I double back into my old line of work to support myself while in the mean time going after my dream in my leisure hours. During this time, I have been saving money in order to either take time off to work on my dreams, or transition into something better. I plan to transition and leave by next year, take some months off to persue creativity full time and see how it feels. I don't expect myself to make money in that time off, but I feel like giving myself the time to do my creativity will be a gift to myself worth giving. I am aware of the pitfalls of negative self talk and fear- so this time around I feel a bit more confident in my decision. However, if I do need to double back into a 9-5 I am okay if things need to flow that way in order to support myself.
I was a Sculptor for 13 years. I was always thinking about how to sell my Models all my life but the thing with me is I always wanted to improve my Sculpting and I need to buy molding and casting because I don't want my models to break. BUT I Never sold Anything! At one point I found a Job for making toys and I messaged this toy company and they asked me to show them a picture of my model but I never did because I wasn't finished with my model so I messaged this toy company way...too soon. About five years earlier before 2024 I had an Eye Problem that I can no longer deal with Chemicals like Clay, Paint charcoals for drawings all that! I had to STOP EVERYTHING to do with Physical Art and only do Digital Art. My World went downhill for me because I was Only good with Physical Art not Digital Art so I had to Retrain Myself to do Digital Art. Digital Art is Awesome but let me tell You, NOTHING is more Amazing then to hold the Model of what I Physically created with my very own Hands! It was AMAZING and there's not a Day that goes by that I wished I can Physically Sculpt Again! To hold my own work like if I feel Sad I hold my Model, If I feel Happy I hold my Model in my hands as a celebration! So my Point to You is Money is important for everyone but you need to Expand your Artwork like instead of drawing a Cute object drawing something you Normally don't draw like something Manly or Aliens or something because that will Open your Mind and Eyes! I'm a Man, and I've sculpted some female people and bought female clothes for my female Models I've Sculpted. That is Weird RIGHT for me as a man? But guess what, it opens my mind that WOW it Showed Me just how Truly Beautiful Women's Truly are! Love your art, Expand your Art and don't focus too much on Money because your Skills and Open minded is something money can't buy! Your Video all I heard is Money, Money, Money. Let me ask you if you rather lose your Art Skills or have No Money which would you take? I'm pretty sure most people would take their Art Skills or their passions over Money. Money doesn't buy Happiness. So my life Now is about spreading my Art and Sculpting skills to my Nephews, Nieces and Relatives so when they grow up they'll be Amazing Artists as well. I take care of my parents and I don't make a dime from Art but again I do Digital Art as experience Nowadays. So if you can still do your Art DO IT Because the Worst thing that your body can tell you is "No more Art" like what my Eyes told me "No more Sculpting for Me....FOREVER! You Don't want that in your Soul.
i think the pressure of generating art out of ur passion does ruin ur creative momentum, how could it not be when ur starving and cant even lift your pen. So ofc money would lift ur worries and let you focus on creativity.
Watched the whole thing through. I do art but as a hobby, not really interested in making it into a job. I think the message her still applies to many people who don't want to be illustrators. Sometimes you just have to try stuff. It may not work, or it just might. It'll teach you things, show you new experiences, bring you out of certain headspaces or might even thrust you into new ones positive or negative. And maybe if you try you'll realize it's not for you. But if you think it might be, go for it.
Hi everyone!! ヾ(＠＾▽＾＠)ﾉ I just wanted to hop in here and say, "WOW." Just absolutely, wow. I am in disbelief at how many of you actually watched this video. Not only that, but the *whole* 1+ hour thing!! The many extremely thoughtful comments from so many of you have me tearing up. I can't believe how much we all share in common through our feelings, our struggles (especially with self-doubt and anxiety!), and life experiences. I'm still working through responding to as many as I can, and I sincerely apologize if I am unable to respond to yours, but please be assured I have read each and every one. And each and everyone has brought a *huge* smile to my face. Some a laugh, and some an eye-brow raise...? (☉‿☉✿) Ahahahaha!
Thank you all sososo much again for taking the time to listen to my story. I feel so connected to so many of you. I feel this overwhelming sense of warmth within my heart. And I feel this renewed sense of excitement to get going with this new comic project I've been dreaming of releasing. I'm crossing my fingers that the story I share through this comic will touch many of you in similar ways. And to those of you who are like me - getting up, and falling down, and getting up again to chase your creative dreams - I wish nothing but all the best to you on your journey!! It's not easy surviving as an artist in this world, but to those of you who are brave enough to keep getting up even when you get knocked down (and after taking a well-deserved break to recover, of course!), I commend you. And I believe that although you may not be making any money from the work you put out there, your work is priceless nonetheless. You are sharing a real part of yourself with the rest of the world - a part of you that is likely to touch and inspire someone unexpectedly. And how beautiful is the thought of that (｡◕ ‿ ◕｡) It's likely that you've already touched someone with your creative work! Try to think back and remember. It's so easy to disregard and sweep kind comments under the rug, especially in a world full of so much negativity and criticism. Just keep hold of all the memories of you have of reaching others with your art. Keep hold and let that continue to fuel your fire.
(✿◕ ‿ ◕✿) Love, Riniapple
Good luck. 🍀
Loved the video, inspiring and relatable. Just a few ideas, hope it's ok. Have you considered selling signed prints of your illustrations, post cards, gift cards, calendars? And possibly producing a series of hand drawn versions of your most iconic works - stockpile them as your reputation increases, and sell them for an appropriately exclusive price. Your work is really good and you can definitely make a rewarding career out of it. Keep building your profile and RUclips channel and you'll have no problem selling your work. Just don't sell it too cheap - high prices are reassuring to art buyers. Good luck
I was there with you
@@ClayKraze you *absolutely* were. Thank you so much for that 🥹💕
Luckily ur still a cute girl on youtube and simps bailed you out. There u go I didnt even had to watch the video
You didn’t fail. The fact you left an unsatisfying job to pursue your dreams is a feat conquered.
No. She failed. Let's not sugar coat it, alright?
@@venomm4563 nope. failure = not trying.
@@nrspinelli Exactly! When one door closes, another is waiting to be opened.
I think a better way to put it, is that she did fail, but failing it's ok. Failing is part of the process. And that failing is not something that you are, it's something that you do to learn.
@@azzalan Nope. failure = not trying. Putting it your way gives a conclusion. the path is ongoing, it's a continuous process of discovery. the only ``failure`` is not trying = letting fear win, keeping you from your path
This is probably the riskiest move for anyone who's trying to make art as their career.
Unless you have a lot of savings, it could work but still risky. I went to cons and asked professionals and I assumed making art was their only job but I was wrong. Some of them still have to keep their day job to support their art and only minority of freelancers are able to do it.
This is pretty much the reality of pursuing art so dont fall for those "take a leap and chase your dreams" advices or videos that you see on Instagram or other social media. This doesnt only happen with art specifically but other creative careers as well like music.
I'm not saying that you shouldn't do it but just be smart and really think about all the consequences and sacrifices that you need to make to take that "leap of faith". Lastly always dont forget to have fun while making art.
some other advice is to try to seek work that doesn't drain your mental energy. i wish when i was younger i had the mindset of try to find something stable that is p*ss easy for the way my brain works so that i can do art at home without feeling like i'm extremely tired at the end of the day.
your comment is very realistic... you also have to consider why that is: that our culture simply isn't equipped to appreciate how much time and effort and passion go into making art. and thats why there isn't enough funding for it.
so i guess i have two takeaways: maybe someone who likes making art could find a job in arts promotion/fund gathering, and that just cuz we live in a depressed society don't let everyone in your life whos obsessed with status etc. create guidelines that you as an artist move by.
@@isabellal2840 that is a really cool advice! I am going to try this out. I am looking for work to support myself while I write my book and I don't want to be a software engineer again while doing that. With engineering at the end of the work day I just wanted to go sleep.
@isabellal2840 This is why I work from home. Driving and dealing with people in an office drained me...I actually did less mentally draining work in office than now but because I have a lot more free time and don't have to be exhausted driving 2 hours round trip daily...it's so much easier.
@@427skieswhat job are you doing now? Is it still the office job as before or is it different?
Yeah most my friends are con-artists (haha) and they either have full time normal jobs or are... unemployed and just tried out this thing to see if it works for them, if not they keep on being jobless. Idk how tho because attending cons is SO expensive.... (and SO time consuming so idk how the full time peeps do it either). I'd love to be a con-artist too but I have neither time nor money to start...
The captain of a ship doesnt see the desired destination for 99% of the journey’s duration, and not for 1 second during that time does he think ‘I’ve failed’. You haven’t failed, you succeeded the moment you wanted this goal and set yourself on the path to achieve it, simply keep moving forward. You’ve succeeded.
Good point
To be honest as an artist myself I've noticed the ones that typically succeed in the long run, keep their day job and spend a few hours over months, years decades working on their craft after. Keep the source of income and dream alive until it's at a level ready to be professional, you can follow what you love but not have to worry about income for some time. This is as someone that's tried and failed over and over since I left foster care at 18, and has pursued art seriously all my life. I've also lived in complete poverty for many years while still studying and practicing relentlessly. This isn't something for the faint of heart.
Thing about it is can be VERY difficult doing your day job and building up your brand as a artist at the same time. Both require a lot of time that you can't finish all up in a day. I would know. Currently, im working on my art and building up my brand and it has been so very time consuming with a LOT of work involved. I'm busy literally 24/7 a day as you literally have to give that much time to it and more. Giving a few little hours a day won't really cut it with all that is cut out for you to do. Sadly, it ends up being that some have to put their passion on hold or even worst leave it to work in a day job they don't like to just pay their bills. I'm hoping to not be that way.
agree. saw this one Japanese artist show his day and it’s insane how he goes to a corporate job and comes home to work for HOURS on his manga. such dedication. my lazy self with ambitious dress could never 😭
@@MsInteresting alot of people are doing it (so am i). so yeah no excuse sorry.
@@Hamyhamster24 Anecdotes
@@star_light.g fr I saw a woman japenese artist doing the same, she got home, cooked because it was her turn she lived with her parents and brothers, drawed till exhaustion, sleep 4 hours, continued and then published it, manga is quite easy tho because it is black and white but still the passion, the ambition 🥲
i love the honesty of your storytime! we always hear of successful artists who make a living off their art,, but not much of those who weren't so lucky. thank you for this!!
The problem I see with a lot of success stories is that they don’t warn you about these possibilities but that’s cause they succeeded. I am proud of you for trying and please continue trying. Most scientists who won Nobel prizes failed for the first experiment to make a breakthrough. Resistance is important. Also many success strories don’t talk about diversifying your stream of income but just putting your eggs in one basket.
Agree, definitely important to set up multiple amounts of income you have for yourself coming in. Don't rely on just one source of income when working for yourself.
This is why I wanted to work in animation specifically; it was an art job that also happened to be a 9-5. But the job market is a mess for multiple industries right now, so I felt backed into a corner to try and start up a small business while at the same time trying to find a day job. But according to overall market trends, companies across the board aren't hiring at the moment. Even fast food and retail are increasingly more difficult to get into nowadays
As an artist, when people ask me for advice about becoming an artist this is my response. Only become a professional artist if you can’t be happy doing anything else. The financial uncertainty of being an artist is so hard.
There is a reason the arts are full of people with either rich parents or have a partner with a good paying job. You need years of financial runway to give yourself the time to be successful. The overnight success stories are mostly fake. They are years in the making. The few that are true are extremely rare.
I’m sorry you are struggling. I’ve been there. I’m close to being there much of the time. I’ve learned I can’t do a full time job and keep up with an art practice. When you feel ready next time maybe get a part time job while you’re also working on finding clients.
But it’s also totally legitimate to just do it for yourself and not turn art making into a job. For a lot of people the money side ruins art.
Good luck
This is so real 😭You and everyone else that has ever tried to pursue a career making art are *so* brave. I think so many of us have a beautiful creative spirit with a need to share our stories, and it's probably the hardest thing in the world to do, so it's nice to hear we're absolutely not alone. :) It's okay to try and fail, you will survive to try again some day. Don't give up, creative work feeds your soul, just like the 9-5 feeds your body. There is never shame in putting survival and mental health first.
i just finished up a two-year ux contract at riot and my first day without the job this month made me feel so free and full of hope. i felt so ready to become the person i've put on the backburner for so long. i have a small but mighty safety net, enough to keep me housed. i am totally open to failing but i just refuse to go back, i refuse to be golden handcuffed...if i'm going to take a salary job, i want it to at least interest me, and that's that! and if it doesn't interest me, i'll do other things for money! i'm trying my best to be determined. 27 is the youngest i'll ever be again so the second-best chance is now :')
i love your art by the way!
I was thinking a few days ago about how “the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence”, so it’s interesting seeing your comment right now. So many artists dream of the Studio Job™️but is that what we’d really want? 🤔 We artists spend so long chasing the perceived legitimacy and validation that comes from that regular paycheck for your work but we artists are also pretty weird and offbeat…. Is clocking in to a cubicle - even at an art-based company - really for us..? (Maybe if the company is really small and allows for a lot of freedom..?)
I’m really glad you’re free to make your own artistic vision come true now 🙂💓
Hey, I'm interested. You worked at Riot and you hated it? Golden handcuffed level?? Tell me more
Also interested, know many peoples’ dreams are to work in Riot’s concept art department and am wondering how it really is if you’re open to talking about it
@@jesterfeathers I honestly think there are fewer and fewer artists who actually want a studio job. Covid and tiktok got everyone thinking that freelance is a good idea when for most artists it's really really not.
Clocking into cubicle in art job is the best thing an artist can do for their mental health and bank account to build a safety net they can let go later on and try to pursue some deep passion and come back again if or when it falls through.
Also small companies are way worse bc there you are wearing many hats and almost inevitably have to overtime all the time.
Artist are not whimsical creatures, we are human who need healthcare and structure and who are often preyed upon by social media selling pipe dreams. I'm not saying studio work is the only choice but it's something a lot of your artists scoff at right now and they end up burning out and working retail, which is way sadder.
How did you get into Riot?
You are SO brave for sharing your story...
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for that.
Awee Aires! Thank you so much !! ヽ(；▽；)ノI really appreciate your support and for taking the time to listen
Very similar story here too - dream to be an illustrator, get scared of the difficulty to make art your living, working soulless jobs, giving up, etc. But in my case AI was the nail in the coffin.
Now I think that your passion should be a hobby, not the thing that your life depends on. It's just too much pressure. Also, if you make it your career, you can't just do whatever you want no more. You have clients, responsibilities, etc. That will bring down the enjoyment a lot. May even make you hate it.
Art career is just too much of a gamble. But do NOT give art up. Work at your passion. No need to give it up. I too have an all or nothing personality. It's not good. Art as a hobby is fine too.
Problem is having enough free time for hobbies of any kind. That's why I am trying to figure out how to make a living without sacrificing your time. That is the holy grail, not turning your hobby into work.
quitting bc of AI is weak af
@@MsMvsc You are right, I have a weak character. But how can you also ignore the facts? Being strong and working hard towards something too risky is just not smart.
@@MsMvsc I already have an art job that I love, but changing my career it's been on my mind for the past year... Just cause I'm anxious AF for the future, and I've already been replaced by AI in some aspects of my work. I'm good at it, but the industry (generally) is greedy.
(Still, I would never quit art as my hobby. I'm too passionate for that)
I don't agree due to the fact making art has always been a big passion of mine to pursue since I was a kid. Having already freelance experience, I've worked with over hundreds people doing work for them to build their vision and business and not once had any of those encounters made me grow out of interest for my love for art. Instead it grew my fondness of it more. I get satisfaction out of it. I was happy to share my gift in drawing to others to help pursue their own dreams. Imo, it really should be about sharing the gift you have to someone who does not posess what you have. Because let's face it there are not many people in the world that can actually draw. Its not a common thing. This is why they want to make AI be such a thing where anybody can use it and thus it make them 'feel' like such and such when they do. Although in reality a user using prompts to make AI generated images clearly does not make them be a skilled drawer or even an artist. Being good at drawing is a skill that requires you having certain traits and actual knowledge in art in order to achieve it.
Many of us here can understand your concern of having art as a career not bring stabled, but what you have to also keep in mind is that the world is always changing with things like AI having made its grand entrance here, making lots of jobs unstabled. A lot of your every day jobs are becoming obsolete, people are being laid off every year, every month nowadays and it's in places they have worked in for years. It's already predicted that cable and movie theaters are going to be no need for in a few years (or even sooner) because people do streaming on their phone/TV and prefer it more. I look at economy news and hear about these things. It is a full blown reality. And if anybody in this year of 2024 and so forth, actually believe they are in a stable job or can find one, your greatly mistaken because the reality is NO job is actually stable out there anymore. It's not like how it use to be years ago. When Covid came, it did a whole 💯 of changing this world upside down and a lot known companies 'failed' and collasped cause of it, ones you wouldn't ever thought would have either. Again the world is always changing. The world is filled with uncertainty. Me solely pursuing after my art as a career does not make it out that I'm not being 'realistic', far from it actually, I'm aware of the failures and uncertainty that lies ahead of me in doing so. But again, everything in the world is like this nowadays. There are people sitting in their houses or places worrying over what will the next day bring to them here as how things in the world are always seemingly changing, no one can be too sure.
I'm an optimistic realist, that means I can take the reality of things being bleak and opportunities being thin around me while still remaining hopeful for success throught it all. It is the attitude I have when pursuing art as a career now. You honestly shouldn't live in this world being afraid or afraid to take risks because it will majorly hold you back in life when you are like that. That's a fact, not a opinion.
Overall, failures are a part of life, you should ultimately learn to embrace them and learn from them, not try to avoid them or run away from them.
And that's just my two cents. I know it was long, but hey I'm very passionate about the topic. 😅
@@MsInteresting You are right about the risk taking. I am struggling with it (or I would have went hard on art before).
Yeah, nowadays there is less stability in everything, but surely art is even more so? I don't really know how to overcome the fear of failure. I'm definitely making a mistake somewhere in my (subconscious) mental model, I just don't know where. "Everything is risky, so you might as well do art" is not enough for me somehow.
But that's not all. Let's consider making some boring online business that saves you from wasting your time at a job. You can do art then too, but it won't be tied to your livelihood, so you can do whatever you want, whenever. Much less pressure, much more enjoyment. Surely this is smarter than going hard on a field that has high skill requirement and is very competitive, and then there is the AI too (which by itself is scary enough to make you quit).
Also maybe I don't want to paint other people's ideas. That is a huge factor too. If you make art your career, you pretty much won't be able to make money with the worlds in YOUR mind. A couple of youtubers might be the exception, but don't expect oneself to be in the top 0.01%.
I am pretty much same as you. I followed my parent's advise to study bioengineering. Ever since then, it has been eating me out during my undergraduate studies and I barely passed. After I graduated, I took on a full-time job for about 3 years till now, and I am saving up for my leap of faith to start doing composing and music full-time. Please give me luck... I am very sad writing this, because I know I have a limited time on Earth and I sorta need.... NEED to get my songs out of my system and sorta give the universe my piece of contribution. Otherwise I feel very stuck. But now I have quite an amount of savings, I'm thinking of going to a laid-off place like Vietnam for several months and work solely on music. (All the while meeting with my other half) Yeah, thank you so much for making this video, it tells me that I am not alone in my quest. Yeah my parents are still not very supportive, but I don't care and I am tuning them out. I kinda sorta hate them, but you know they are getting old and asian have this mindset so yeah. Not caring about them anymore. Handling a job is already very respectful, and while doing it you do art too. It will definitely be a challenge. People always say do both until art takes off, but it's crazy ya know. It's not like a full-time job doesn't has it's own stress. I really hope you make it and be successful in your own way. Be at a status quo where you can say that you're satisfied with your standing and where you are, I guess that will be the best and what I will want for myself too.
dang. im no illustrator but i watched the entire thing, this feels like a parallel universe where you took path of going back to a job, while i took the path of dreams, in other words, unemployment (im on year 2). i'd like to assure you the grass is always greener as if you took the non job route like i am, you'd still have financial concerns like i do everyday
thank you for sharing your experiences, it puts into perspective my decision and doubts, and this whole video resonated so much with me i feel less alone in my experience.
the thing is, you need a plan, a strategy, savings or at least a stable income UNTIL you are stable in your dream. That's the thing, you only failed once you have given up. If you figure out you don't want to actually pursue it, then alright, but if you still want to do it, you should always go for it. The road is not a a straight road, it's normal to have setbacks.
What a genuinely delightful human being. Beautiful, openly emotional and honest, please universe keep this precious lady safe!
As someone who is 30, just learning to draw for the first time ever, and wants to pursue illustration as a career, this is probably the very last video I should watch...
Awe, I just want to give you the biggest hug right now ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥᷄⌓˂̣̣̥᷅ )‧º·˚ I really hope this video doesn't work to discourage you! And if it helps you feel any better, I am just about 30 myself! If anything, I hope my story shows you that self-doubt is the biggest obstacle when chasing your dreams. I think it's easy to see that if I had just stuck the course and trusted myself, I may have actually made something of all of the effort I started the journey off with. All I know is that this is going to be a long game and the only way to see things through to the finish line is to enjoy the journey and keep believing in myself the whole way. Although I may have fallen down once (or maybe a few times) I am choosing to get up again. And I will choose to keep getting up because I honestly don't think I can help myself. I just love making art too much ヾ(＠＾▽＾＠)ﾉ
I wish nothing but success for you and hope you choose to keep pursuing your amazing dream (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ You can do it!! Seriously, you can!
@@Riniapple well said ❤
@@Riniapple I am so sorry but are you 30? omg...I really thought that you are max 20-21...lol
@@anadwhyahahah!! I am 28! Turning 29 this October. I get that I look a bit young for my age pretty often 😅 It’s probably the asian genes (°▽°)
I’m 38 and starting.. 😅 best of luck
Do NOT beat yourself up over this you adorable macaron of a person. You did nothing wrong. If there’s one thing humans are good at, its reaching for something they want bc everything be damned. And its chaotic, got its risks, struggles - but we’re not all knowing. Its the only way we get what we want. But we need to keep reaching or we’ll never grasp whatever it is we’re after. You took the first step and hardship towards the life you want, and its going to be yours bc this is YOUR journey. Also, i appreciate the truckstop compassion you’re giving by making vids like this as you continue your story.
I can really relate to this. My dream was also to be a children's book illustrator and then I ended up making comics. But there was a point where it was like, "What am I doing this for?" It lead me down a road of questioning why I was making art... was it for money, to be seen by others, self esteem? I definitely think depression is linked there because I felt seen and even if someone offered me a ton of money to make a kids book, I think my attitude would have prevented me from wanting it or enjoying it. It made me really dig deeper to as to what I had really hoped for with "making it" in my art practice. Part of it was community... wanting to be connected to others. Other things were fantastical... living in Japan and working with other illustrators. As I made friends with an illustration community in Japan and visited there, I found out they're facing the same struggles. It's just a superficial goal that doesn't lead anywhere.
To me, it all boils down to how much are you enjoying and feel invested in your every day life, regardless of the art. The art is a practice, not a goal. When I hear your stories about the different jobs you do, I don't hear how your every day life is fulfilling. I think until we face head-on those issues, we won't find that passion for our practice.
This is a great comment. I realized my mistake was that I unconsciously placed "art" over "life". A little ironic and a strangely easy mistake to make. Thank you for sharing, this was incredibly helpful! I'll be thinking about this a lot.
sorry im a bit slow but what does art is a practice not a goal mean? and what if i enjoy art but can’t make much money from it then do I just keep trying?
@@estelle8757 goals are fine but also short-lived. Once you hit your goals, it’s easy to crash and lose momentum. And if you can’t hit your goals, you may feel defeated and give up. But when your art is a practice, something you do every day or so without expectations other than your own personal improvement, you’ll be more likely to continue working without the ups and downs disrupting you. You won’t be so precious with everything because you’re constantly making. It’s just like exercising… you do it because it makes you better and you’ll continue to get better from repetition and showing up.
@@Windy2468 I’m glad it resonated with you.
@@estelle8757 I'm not sure it's the same for OP, but for me, it means that we do art for the sake of the process, not for what we hope to get out of the end product. I want to draw even if I don't have an audience. I still want to improve, but I will get enjoyment out of the practice regardless. Like living for living's sake
Love hearing other artists’ stories and I’m excited for your new work! After realizing that I preferred a job with routine, I decided to become a teacher so I could work on my art in the summers (and because I enjoy it). It was definitely the best decision for me but I still feel like a failure sometimes. I remember seeing the same Minnie Smalls video and being so inspired. It took me a long time and quitting posting my art online to remember that I started doing art because it was fun and meaningful to me, not just so I could post it. I admire full time artists but I have to remember why I chose my path. One day, I hope I can make a successful small and local art business to do part time but I don’t dream of going viral anymore.
I love hearing about your story as well!! What a brilliant choice in career, especially with the whole summer off to focus on your art! Honestly speaking, after scouring the web for the experiences of other practicing artists, I’m certain that the majority of them have some sort of supplemental income - whether it be teaching, part-time work, or a full-time job with art as a side project. You are certainly not a failure for doing so! (Even though it may feel like that at times. I totally understand 🥹)
Amazing how one video touched so many of us! I’m glad we share Minnie Small’s inspirational video in common. I’m so glad you’ve found your way back to art and I’m so glad you’ve found a path that makes you feel comfortable enough to continue without feeling overwhelmed. I think that’s the most important thing when trying to trying to maintain a sustainable artistic practice 💕
@@Riniapple thank you so much for replying! This reply was really what I needed to hear right now🥹❤️
Honestly? I wish I was you. I feel fantastic about my art but wish I was focused enough to complete 4 years of college for a special Ed teaching degree. I struggle with focus and motivation when it comes to college classes so I always end up dropping out and feel like a failure. Sometimes I wonder if the world mocks me or if it is teaching me something. When it comes to art I feel far more motivated and determined, but with work and careers I'm a sputtery mess 😂❤ I do send this with love that I don't think you're a failure; you're someone I'd look up to!
Thank you for sharing your story, I relate sooo much. I quit my secure job too for illustration and I expected not easy, but I didn't expect it to be quite this hard 😅. It's pretty heavy on my mental health and I am currently trying to find a part time job, so I don't feel like I am doing nothing, even though I know I work every day for it, but yeah. I understand why you felt the need to get back to that feeling of security. Your style is so so nice, I don't understand why people, especially those in the industry, tend to give out advice like "this is not what people prefer right now". I mean how do you know? Isn't it the point to be diverse? And there are 8 billion people on this planet and most of them are on the internet, so I can't believe all of us prefer the same style or whatever. Granted not all of them read comics, but I think each of us can have our own crowd. I am looking forward to following your journey 💕
Hii randomsquirrel!! Thank you so much for taking the time to watch my video and for sharing your experience! 🥲💕 It sounds like we've been through something very similar Isn't it funny how we don't consider work that we aren't being paid for "real work"? When really, that's not the case at all!! If anything, working on our art is the most honest work there is. I sincerely hope you're taking care of yourself and doing whatever you need to do to keep yourself happy and healthy. It's not easy jumping into something like this, so I don't blame you for seeking some sort of stability again. Honestly, if I could go back, I wish I would have chosen to return to a part-time job rather than full-time. It affords you some peace of mind while still offering plenty of time to work on your art! So, I think a return to part-time is an excellent decision (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
And thank you very much for your lovely comments about my art (> //
I loved hearing about you stepping outside your comfort zone at around 41:00. It was incredible watching your face light up to and reminds me that every time I step out of my comfort zone, it's scary at first but so so worth it in the end. It's just so tough stepping outside my bubble, UGHHH. Thank you for your amazing testimony. You are an incredible inspiration and I hope you find the success you are looking for.
I've never seen your channel, but your title totally caught my eye because that's EXACTLY what I went through too. Around 1:02:00, I realized that the things I loved to do don't make enough money, and art is REALLY REALLY REALLY competitive. In my art classes, very few people MADE it. But I love doing art. I keep drawing, sketching, and doodling a lot. Like you mentioned, creativity and artwork don't have to go away; they'll come through in other ways. It's not so much about finding a 'job that you love and you'll never work again' but more about finding a job that pays well and you can tolerate. The key word is tolerate.
Leaving is one thing but admitting your failures all out in the open takes an immense amount of courage. Youre brave and thank you for this, i learnt so much.
Thanks for sharing your journey, the honesty and self awareness you had going through it all is admirable.
I can relate to this - always wanted to pursue art but never had an 'in' - there were years I would forget about it and then passionately reconnect with it. For me I think it helps to find inspiration and pursue it without thinking too much about the money otherwise it is too much pressure. It depends on the situation but I find it easier to stay dedicated to making art when I'm not trying to get anything out of it. If you're a full time artist i guess it is a different story.
Hello riniapple! I just stumbled upon this vid while I was making my merch for an upcoming con, its been about a month or so since I was laid off from my corpo job and decided to take a leap of faith with my art and started working on my art merch business. your story has been so inspiring, not only because of the achievements you've accomplished but because the struggles and fear you had doing all this, reminded me so much of everything I've been going thru myself. I wish to continue my art career and not fall back into the corpo job space, but hearing your story its been eye opening that if I do get to the point I have to look for a new job, you reminded me that I am not a failure. that I can pursue art again when I feel like it. or that I can do both with a healthy balance. you've reassured me that I can still be an artist. thank you for sharing your story and experience, I wish you the best riniapple!!
Hii paositive ヽ(；▽；)ノ💕Reading this made me feel so happy! I’m so glad my story helped you realize that you are not a failure despite the setbacks you’ve faced. As long as you chose to keep getting up, you are still on your way to achieving your dreams 🥹And yes, you certainly can still be an artist - always ❤️
Thanks for sharing your story, I have a lot of feelings on this topic, and I appreciate your perspective. It's really difficult to monetize art. Whether you're self employed or going from contract to contract, it comes at a steep cost: changing your art to suit the market or the client, spending most of your time on business management, the stress of feast and famine. I've been self employed for 10 years now and I'm honestly exhausted. The last few years have been so hard, I've gotten into debt to try to tough it out. For a long time I loved it. I was a workaholic and thought I thrived on the excitement of it, but in the end, it was unsustainable both financially and emotionally. In an ideal world, people would be able to devote themselves to art and other worthwhile pursuits without worrying about financial survival, but we live in this world, so we do the best we can with the choices we have. From where I sit, that's exactly what you've been doing :)
I resonated with your experience, especially the part where you talked about feeling like you were drifting in the ocean with no purpose, giving up on the dream you were chasing or wanting most of your life would be like giving up a part of yourself, a big part. Thank you for sharing your story with us.
It is so commendable that you tried, and you have not failed, you have grown and learnt! You’re also really adorable and likeable even through the wonders of RUclips. Please make more videos, the world needs your expertise and experience. ❤
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am an online art teacher, but I've been sharing my art journey on RUclips for over 4 years now. I can understand the struggle of trying to "make it as an artist". I'm learning so much every day, but it does take a lot of time and effort, but, in my opinion, perservence is key. I've just come to realize that I'd still be doing this even if no one was watching. It's my hobby and it means something to me and I'm trying to go after my dream and that makes it worth it. I wish you happiness and success and I look forward to seeing where your art journey takes you.
Thank you for sharing your story. It's truly inspiring. Remember that you didn't t fail, you're still in the journey, not at the end of it.
Dear Rini,
As a 25yr old, your whole video is so relatable & relevant in my current circumstance! You didn't give up on your dreams as you're still here & have inspired 2.11k+ subs & 15k+ viewers--- other people(imagining that many people gathered in a room is impressive!) along the way who are here with you now to follow you in your creative endeavors. CONGRATS! Keep up the grit---daily, weekly, monthly, yearly---& beyond---a lifetime! From start to end listening to you I could feel & see your soul, character, & self-compassion developing. You are not alone in the life long wrestle with uncertainty as that is exactly the mark of a true artist & you've survived to continue telling your story. Thank you for courageously sharing it as you've given me & countless others further encouragement & personal reassurance in our own creative paths as a fellow artists. It would be cool to work on something with you, maybe a podcast, in the future if possible haha! 😆🙌❤🔥🕊✨
Much love, Cheers!
I feel that we put so much pressure on earning money through art that we tend to forget to enjoy the creation process. Maybe it is a good option to have a supporting job that lets you have free time to create and enjoy the art that feeds your soul. Also the freedom to create whatever is in your mind without the need to conform anyone for money sounds pretty good. Like you said, it's not all black and white. Thank you for opening to us with so much honesty. I'm sure your story will help many people. This made me dive into thinking, I'll see where that leads me. 🥰
I don't think anyone can tell you that you did it wrong ultimately you just did what was right for you depending on the situation.
But I want to say to everyone in regards to the anxiety if you're anxiety prone you need to trick it. Anxiety hates taking risks, keeping the risks at minimum is easier for reaching goals. For example instead of quitting cold turkey, cutting down your hours instead as you gain more work, or temping every few months or going back to education, taking a career break if that is accessible to you, condensing your hours...It's a bit longer this way but it could help manage the anxiety so it doesn't stop you completely from doing what you want to do. There's probably some other options but this is all I can think of. My anxiety would never have let me quit the unfulfilling job to pursue my dream so I've had to find other ways.
This advice is great, thank you ;-; I've been very anxious lately, so thanks for sharing your experience
I am only in 20 minutes, but I really appreciate the honesty and unedited feel of this video - so refreshing in the jungle of videos that feel so fake
Ahh!! Thank you so much for watching so far in Anjuliiii ＼(T▽T)／ I debated editing all of the "umms" and "ahhs" out, but I wanted it to feel like a sit down with a good friend. I'm glad you enjoy the format!! 🥰
Even if this did not go to plan, I am sure that when you are old you will not regret this leap of faith. Later in life nobody wishes that they had spent more time working and less time following their dreams.
Your work and style is absolutely gorgeous! It's just a matter of getting it in front of the right eyeballs, and that unfortunately IS a numbers game with a fair amount of luck as well. Sounds like you're in a much better headspace at this point which is so important, and I do not doubt for a SECOND that you will get the opportunity to share you work with many, many more people. Keep at it, and thanks for sharing your story.
It has that comfy art vibes honestly. Reminds me a bit of Mark Crilley's stuff in a way
Going after one’s dream is always a win and such a journey can’t ever be just a straight road from a to b, because there’s growth that needs to happen along the way. It’s all love and as long as there are people like you, I have love for humanity.
Yes, create to express yourself.
Just like this video is self expression, this is your art, live. You can include your toons and anything else in your videos and posts.
my goodness! this is so hard. I quit my job at Apple in October of last year and YES i am on this journey of self doubt and fear, the almost recoiling and trying to figure out HOW... "how am i gonna make any money!?!?" That 6 month checkpoint is such a big moment where you feel like you can "make it or break it" Especially as you start digging into your savings and you watch it dwindle.
BUT i loved your really heavy shares about an hour in and im so glad your are back. I tried to be an artist in the way that the "art world" and my art school expected me to, now im taking a completely different approach and it feels so fulfilling! SO SO SO excited to see what you do coming back to yourself and your creativity again after leaving. 💕
This is so sincere and heartfelt. As someone working towards being a full-time artist after some time away from it, it's so comforting hearing you share your realistic experiences
As someone who also struggles balancing my 9 to 5 with making art and trying to find my place in the illustration world, thanks for sharing. I also stopped making art for some years and it has been difficult to restart that spark.
its very brave of you to jump into an industry that you werent specifically prepared for in college and perfect your skills regardless and relentlessly follow your dreams despite all that anxiety (not to mean that in a way that you were ignorant and jumped into things without properly being aware because i believe that you gotta start somewhere if youre serious about fulfilling ur hopes). i definitely think stuff is gonna work out for you in terms of ur artistic career so dont give up on social media and art !!!
You are indeed super brave! I am so glad you found your own way to follow your passion! You definitely didn’t fail, or, if you will, you failed the “artist way”: you realised what wasn’t working and changed it, as opposed to completely giving up due to frustration. That’s failing successfully 👌
Its the uncertainty that weighs on us which makes us question ourselves daily. "Failure" is an opportunity for growth. ironically I just started doing art and learning anything i can to improve. The thing i say to people that asks "what should they do?" I usually tell them to go find themselves - really look into what youre really passionate about. It seems like you have a true passion in art which is amazing but the weight of uncertanty is preventing you from doing your best. Dont let uncertainty stop you. With risk comes reward. I am currently looking for a full time job right now and while i wait for a response (hopefully very soon) I want to continue learning art.
Hi from a fellow Canadian! So much of your story resonates me with me, especially the black and white thinking. I left my job about a year and a half ago, originally giving myself 6 months to just chill out. I didn't originally leave to focus on trying to make illustration a career, but I ended up figuring out that that was my longer term goal. I don't know if I would've figured that out if I hadn't taken some proper time off work.
I'm starting to apply to regular 9-5 jobs now and have found myself slipping into that all-or-nothing thinking -- completely putting off drawing or reaching out to illustration-related people for long periods of time 'cause I feel like I can only concentrate on one thing at a time. I hope if I do get a regular job, that I can still find the energy to make art outside of work and keep chipping away at the larger goal. I'm hoping that identifying the goal is the first big piece of the puzzle and at least now I have a better idea of why I'm working in the first place (for stability while I work towards this goal!).
So glad to hear at the end of your story that you're making art again. I hope we can all find the right balance of creative fulfillment and not having to worry about money lol!
I totally stumbled upon this video and think it was meant to be cause it really resonated. This is a really hard topic to even say out loud and share so I commend you for it. Showing that vulnerability and being real in a way is refreshing.
I'm going through something similar and the financial burden of everything really does weigh heavy. It feels like it takes every ounce of energy to just do anything creative with that burden hanging over.
Its sad that as creatives we are forced to choose between what brings us joy versus what we have to do to survive. (Even at the cost of us turning our art into money)
That being said, its great that you still have a joy and love for illustration and storytelling.
That's something that will always be with you and that year that you stepped away was healing you needed (Especially after powering through your portfolio)
Glad to hear you won't give up--your art reaches people and I'm sure has inspired someone to pursue their own creative journey!
I look forward to seeing your creative journey in the future!!
You got this!!
As an aspiring writer, I do appericate creatives who are transparent about their story, and it takes a lot of courage to take the risk. It's awesome to hear that you aren't giving up on your artist dreams. Can't wait for the next chapter in your journey 😊
You tried, and that's more than most people will ever muster up. It's not a failure, it's an experience and you will never regret what you've accomplished!
As someone who's reaching the crossroads of deciding what I want to do for a career after school, this video is so comforting. I relate so much to your connection with art since I've always been obsessed with stories, illustrations, animations etc. and am now wanting to write and share stories through comics. I always decided as a kid that I wanted to do something creative. Yet now that I'm older and reality seems closer than ever, I'm scared of regretting either doing art or not doing it.
It's comforting to watch a video about the hardships that come with art and even more so the mental difficulties. Just the idea of giving up something that I've worked so hard all of these years to maintain and the one dream I've held onto for hope has really made me feel depressed. Your video just makes me feel so understood. Thank you for sharing
the similarity i share with your story is wild. Even down to the month and year I left my 9-5 with a similar plan and circumstance with my partner and savings to pursue my dreams. What I found interesting was that my story went very much the same. The first year or so I loved it, but soon enough it became hard to do the things I loved because of the worries about the longevity of the lifestyle and when I would start making money again. Eventually I realized I too would be better off getting a 9-5 again.. to allow myself some peace of mind while I continue to pursue the projects I started. So far, I'm at the finding a 9-5 job part of my journey again and hoping it comes with that sense of relief you talked about as well as the balance I need to continue my projects. I can't thank you enough for sharing your story, as its felt incredibly validating of what I've been feeling the past two years of this wild journey.
You never ever gave up on the dream. You let go of the pressure.
You are amazing for sharing this and I can relate so much! 🙏 I am always afraid to talk about it, but this helped me to process what happened for me. Thank you!
You are very brave for making this video and of course for trying to pursue your passion, most people don't even get to the point of trying! It's a tough career to break into and comics is some of THE toughest, along with animation.
I very much relate to your story, my parents also pushed me into a "safer" career and I ended up getting 3 unrelated degrees before I've decided to give it a try after all in my late 20s and got my first art job at a game studio. I loved it but it was an entry job with a very small wage so I've tried going freelance for over a year and failed to make it a sustainable career even though by that time I was drawing for 10 years and had pretty good skills but not a great portfolio or idea what I want to do. I've also spiraled down into a pretty bad depression (and it was in the middle of covid too). But then I've managed to get a good game studio job and even though it wasn't anything particularly fun, to draw all day and be off and free by 6 and to get a VERY nice paycheck for all of that fixed my mental (and physical) health and helped me improve my skills. After two years opportunity presented itself to pivot to the job with smaller pay but the one I was more passionate about (book cover illustration!) but I was cautious this time and worked both for a couple of months. Not sure I recommend that but I was determined to feel it out before the jump this time and then I did jump. Been working with the same company for 2 years now and overall pretty happy!
I don't know if everyone could or should be going the same route I did but now I'm very passionate about discouraging artists from taking risky leaps because I've seen SO many people burn out completely and abandoning art forever. It takes strategic thinking and some luck for those who want to do it full-time, it's absolutely possible. But of course to keep it just as a creative outlet is also a valid way to go!
One thing I want to advice you please NEVER sign up to Originals. It's the way for them to exploit unexperienced artists and not worth it at all. RUclips and slow and steady rise of your audience is a much healthier way to go about it! I wish you best of luck in your journey!
Hi Kateryna!! o(^▽^)o Thank you so much for taking the time to watch my video and leave such a thoughtful comment ❤ I agree that the comics industry is probably one of the toughest illustration industries to break into x_x;; Despite that, I can’t help but be intensely drawn to this medium. Although I may never make a living from it (or any income at all), I will continue to make comics for the pure joy of it nonetheless (о´∀`о)
It sounds like you’ve had quite the journey!! That’s amazing that you were able to complete three degrees in subjects you weren’t all that interested in :o that takes some *serious* self discipline!! I’m glad you were able to find something you enjoy for work and I think it’s wonderful that you’d like to share your hardships with other aspiring artists to give them more realistic expectations and to help save them from the all too common burn out that comes with exerting yourself too hard to pursue your passion. Also!! Thank you for the warning about Originals! I’ve heard similar things and agree that if the opportunity ever does present itself, it’d probably be wiser to maintain control of my work and continue building up my own following ❤
Going through a similar period of anxiety at the moment and trying to fight through it, so I really feel what you are talking about. You have my biggest respect for everything you did and how you're finding your way through. I don't see any failure there at all. I just see someone with a lot of courage to figure out what is acutally working for yourself. And I think this is just the beginning of a great story that you're gonna tell. Just keep on doing what truly makes you happy:)
First of all, I want to thank you for taking the courage to sit in front of a camera and tell your experience. For introverts, this is really difficult, so I really appreciate it.
I feel very identified with everything you have experienced. I am at a point in my life where I could consider that I already know how to draw to "sell" but still not enough to make a living from it. It is quite frustrating at times, and having to think about that "tug of war" in which you enter a "normal" job and then return to your projects, again and again, is truly exhausting. I never had the opportunity to go to a university and live the experience of learning to do that type of work with colleagues and receive that feedback, I have simply been myself. I see many of my colleagues on the internet come and go, all trying to make a living from what we love (illustration) but it is certainly very overwhelming to see incredible artists having to put their projects aside, for one, two, or several years... It is inevitable to feel that concern, and I do not want to be negative, I just feel that it is nice to be able to empathize with other artists knowing that many of us are going through the same thing!
Even so, we all know that there will be nothing in the world that fulfills us more than illustrating, honestly all the depression, bad days, stress, go away when I see art, I create art, when I see someone like you Riniapple, it honestly fills me with life and hope, and that is why I get up every day, to be able to touch people's feelings just like you did with us!
Thank you for making art, thank you for feeling, thank you for being so genuine and so real.♡
Hii Shiro!! You’re so very welcome ヽ(；▽；)ノ💕 Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to my story. I’m so glad you were able to resonate with my experiences in so many ways. I absolutely agree with you when you say that being an artist is such a difficult thing in this world. It’s even harder to see artists you love be crushed by all the pressures of society 😞 But just as you’ve said, for many of us creatives, there is nothing other than art that has the ability to replenish our souls. And so we continue to create despite what others say and despite all odds ❤️ Thank you so much again! Wishing you all the best in your own creative pursuits!
I am an artist/illustrator with dreams, and I am very grateful to you for sharing your story. Don’t give up; your art is amazing, and I know you will go far. You are very brave, and this video has inspired me a lot. I also dream of dedicating myself to art, but sometimes life doesn't go that way. I am 29 years old and have tried several times to pursue art. I won’t give up because it’s something I love, and I would like to live a life where I can dedicate myself to something that makes me happy.
I just moved to Canada and left everything behind... my family, my friends, my home. But I brought my dream of being an artist with me in my suitcase :) At the moment, I am not working until I can get my work permit, so I want to take advantage of this time to become a better artist and pursue my dreams. I would really like to get involved and be in touch with the artist community in Canada. It would be nice to make new friends, share our art, and our passion for art.
I hope the best for you and your future! 🥰 Thank you for making this video
YOUR ART IS AMAZING. LIKE LITERALLY WHEN I SAW FOLLOW YOUR ART I CRIED (IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL), AND YOUR OTHER WORK IS NO WORSE. I LOVE HOW YOU CAN DO SO MANY DIFFERENT STYLES. I HOPE YOU MAKE LONGER WEBTOONS IN THE FUTURE AND GET A GOOD MARKETING AGENCY. I BET YOULL HAVE NO ISSUES GETTING MORE FANS AND PERHAPS PERUSING YOUR DREAM.
Ahh (⋈◍＞◡＜◍)。✧♡ Thank you so much starlight!! (; _ ;) That literally makes me so happy to hear. Yes! I fully intend for my next Webtoon project to be long-term and my hope is to have it published as a book one day (∩˃o˂∩)♡ Thank you so much again for your comment and support
I’m 31 and going into the art career world and it’s something I wish I would have done sooner than later for sure. But as an older person I feel more confident in what I wanna produce and the future comics that I’m going to publish one day is something for me and other (whomever they are )to enjoy and that’s the best I can hope for ❤
hey thanks for making this. i just graduated and have been sitting at home with no goal or path in mind since i'm also uninterested in further pursuing my major. i find myself feeling a deep sense of purposelessness due to the lack of direction and similar pressures from family. either way, i know i want to become independent, and i need to take a step for that to happen and just figure it out from there. hearing about your good job experiences was sweet and i appreciate you recounting this time in your life :)
I really resonated with your feeling of drifting in the middle of the ocean and not knowing where to go or swim. I have also been trying for so long to break into the illustration industry. I'm probably more frustrated by the fact that I put myself into so much debt, and well, there's nothing to show. I also feel re-ignited sometimes by new project ideas, but a lot of my old ideas - I feel like I'm forgetting them. And quite frankly, at 35, I'm about ready to put it all down. I felt such sadness, I've not processed it yet, tbh, and kind of just realized, I want to go to therapy....
This is such wisdom that you are sharing, and everyone who has thought about taking a similar path to this NEEDS to hear your story, especially young people who aren't sure what to pursue as a college major/career
I'm not an illustrator, but definitely adjacent to that, as a motion gfx artist. I went to design school, and I'm very thankful to be using my degree. But if I was starting over, I definitely would've considered going into a career that wasn't art/design related, for similar concerns of employment opportunities. There are pros and cons to the job, and what you said about feeling like you HAD to make a career out of it to be successful is what many people likely feel.
For anyone thinking of going into art/design, know this: unless you're fully self employed, you won't get to create all the art you want 100%- when working with clients, you are ultimately catering to THEIR vision. And that can get frustrating.
For those thinking of quitting, really reconsider if you don't have a game plan...and I'd say try to make use of your PTO if possible to take days off to focus on art!
Thank you so much for this video! I'm someone who has constant self doubt because of my age, still living with my parents, not having a job and wanting to persue a career as an artist/writer/game developer (I guess creator would be a better term haha), so your video was really inspiring and even informative for me! It answered questions I never found the answer for, it made me a little more determined, even if my conditions are so limiting... So yeah, I just wanna thank you a bunch!
I accidentally came across your video and realized that I am currently in a similar situation. Your words are exactly what I really needed to hear, thank you))💙
Gosh dang. I'm 30 minutes in and I am hanging onto your words.. a lot of the highlights you share ring similar. I won't bit by bit compare... but I was always praised for my art as a child, and as a late diagnosed ADHD a lot of insecurity and overthinking has lived in me. Always loved to create, loved animation. But I've struggled a lot, and going for art felt like an impossibility to live on given the human being (creature?) that I was. I went for anything else, had over 20 different jobs. As a caregiver, I hurt myself during the pandemic and post-pan, I went from working 100+ hours a week to barely being able to deal with 30. More drama, mental health, scary stuff- I know we all went through our own thing. I left my most recent job six months ago with huge burnout. with the support of my partner, and as we speak, I am at the very beginning of an illustration-as-earning-a-living journey. I trust that I want it, and am hopeful.. but damn is it scary. I have little savings. 😅 But I'm very grateful to have this time to figure things out.
Very relatable! I'm a creator in his 40s and all of this still applies. Love your illustration style; thanks for the video.
Cool to find someone with same feeling and that emptyness and depression with good jobs making money and being stable. I quit drawing for 1 year as well just working, but I was getting that feeling as well. I got so frustrated and depressed that I didn't even wanted to grab a pen. I'm still fighting against it, but you got further that I got. This year I worked again and took a pen without a bad feeling. When I say you got further, it because you fought, and you shared your art, and worked a lot, I worked a lot but all is just a memory now. Keep working, don't give up, not as I did. I still procrastinating a lot due to my bad experience with art, but maybe one day I will get that spark you got that made you move :3
I am inspired, you're so brave for sharing this. Thank you for pep talking me into staying in the middle. I also have a tendency to go all out or none at all. Balance is the key
I am a musician who works full time and makes music by night. I was always too scared to pursue music as a career, as I was pretty sure it just wouldn't be commercially viable for me. But in doing that, I have found that in some ways it's the best of both worlds. I get to work on something I find creatively and existentially fulfilling (music) but it doesn't have to be a make or break, sink or swim source of income, as I support myself in other ways (my boring 9-5). But through that I've been able to pursue really fun little experiments that I don't know if I ever would have let myself dedicate time to if I needed projects to put food on the table. I've made tons of friends through collaborating with other artists on little hobby projects online; there can be a lot of perks to the approach you're taking. And who knows, in the future as things develop and you get your name and work out there more, opportunities may present themselves and perhaps your art can be an additional source of income, enough that you can transition into part-time work, or even leave behind your job all together again. There is certainly a spectrum to existing as an artist online.
I have never related to any video more in my life. This is the exact journey I've been on from start to finish. I'm currently at the point in my journey where I'm trying to quit my 9-5 job to pursue art, but I’ve been putting it off because of the exact insecurities you described with the possibility of regrets and financial instability. But I still have the tiny voice telling me to pursue my art and my passion. I've gotten to the point where I have so much anxiety about pursuing art as a career that I haven't drawn for years now, but I recognize I'm giving up my dream without even trying.. I very much so have the all or nothing, black or white thought process as well which isn't helpful :') I hope I can find the same middle ground as you to pursue art for the love of creation, but I feel like I'm a long way away.
You are super brave to push past your anxieties and move forward ❤ I really hope this next part in your journey fulfills your artistic passion
I've been following you for 6 years and had no idea you were struggling with the same things that I have been. I'm so happy and proud of you for making it this far and pursuing art and your dreams once again. You're a huge inspiration to me. Thank you for sharing your story :D
It happened to me exactly the same as you, this was really helpful and you are so brave and kind, thank you for sharing your story. I cried with you during the video. I remember saying the same words to my psychologist. "i quit my dreams, i losing the light that had guided me since childhood" and finding myself in that ocean lost and without support. I am also happy to know that your friends supported you and you have a very nice space to do art. I would like to be able to live alone one day, that is a great relief since you do not owe anything to anyone except yourself and your dog hehe but other younger people demand that we generate income or study something else at the university, because we are at their house, so it is not easy, besides in my country we have ugly and tiny, dark rooms (at least mine is like that jaja ) your room is beautiful and I bet it motivates you to create, it goes a lot with your style (you art is beautifull) and your desk is healthy for your back, what you can be most happy about is knowing that now you will not be exploited by a company that will make you draw whatever they one quickly and badly. You will create true art in your own style and desire. Creative freedom is also a gift that professionals do not have because they are told to do things they do not like in very short periods of time where they have to stay up all night every day to finish or stay in the office long hours for free, is stressful.In general artists are not valued, so don't feel like it's your fault, you are an artist for what you know how to do, not for whether they hire you to do what they want. You do your art freely and I assure you that many of us will connect with it.
I felt very touched by your story. Just like you, I was really drawn to art since I was a child- I felt comfort in it, but I always felt I was not for it. Even when I practiced and started a degree, I gave up and sometimes I feel I did it too easily.
Your work is wholesome, you should keep trying even if you sometimes feel uncertain. Believe me, I understand you in a deep level and you almost brought me to tears, but you are talented- even if it's hard for you to believe it right now, keep trying. Send your portafolio. I'm sure you'll be able to achive your dream.
you can still have a stable full-time job while chasing your dream on the side. Don't put al your eggs in one basket. learn tio prioritize and manage your time...and you can do both.
this is the longest video I have watched on youtube I guess and it was worth every second. I am soooooo thankful for your honest words and sharing your true story. thank you so so so much. you are such an inspiring person and a very lovely artist I just discovered your channel and now insta too because of my youtube algorithm. I am very happy and I wish you sooo much sunshine and love. ♥ you are doing great. you are on your right path. and I am so in love with your characters. they are so lovely.
I think a lot of people can relate to this - have gone through or will go through something similar. I went through a different story, but ended up at pretty much the same conclusion, about taking things as they come.
Like you, I'm also back to an inspired point in my life now, but with it still lingers a sense a fear... because of getting hurt by my own unrealistic expectations in the past. I'm fearful I'm still the same naive person, just in a different way? Worrying that there's something I'm not seeing right now, and this peaceful time will also crash.
It's very touch and go, with cycles of confidence and doubt/loss. Beyond art, a lot of things happened that changed my attitude about life, and consequentially what I want from art. Sometimes I believe I've "wised up" and have finally learned how to just be okay with everything, and sometimes I worry I'll regret this time in the future too. Maybe the real answer is that this uncertainty is permanent.
I'm seeing similar quarter- or mid-life "crisis" experiences from my non-artist friends and their professional careers as well. But I think it affects artists/musicians or anyone with a "passion project" the most, because those passions just take so much time, effort... and emotional investment.
Anyways it looks like we're probably going to go through the next phase together, of whatever this is 😂
Thanks for the video, it helped me do some self-reflection. It also helped me get out of one of my "lost" cycles, and I have some new answers for myself. So thank you, it was truly meaningful to me 🙂
This has been soooooo healing to listen to! I first started trying to do my own thing in 2020 and had very similar doubts, always running back to a job and trying again. I can understand the struggle so I am routing for you! You've got this, believe in yourself and your talent and know you have your own back!
P.S. YOU ARE SO SO BRAVE! And you are brave now for doing the video, sharing all this and trying again. You should be so proud of yourself
Thank you so much mariah!! ヽ(；▽；)ノ💕 You’re actually the sweetest! Thank you for believing in me and thank you for your support 🥺❤️ It’s a tough thing - chasing your creative dreams with self-doubt and financial insecurity constantly looming over. I completely understand running back to a job when things get really uncertain (x_x;;) But at the end of the day, all that matters is that we get back up and keep trying!! ٩( 'ω' )و Wishing you all the best on your journey!!
in a smimilar situation so was nice to hear this story while making webtoon. Hope you enjoy your day and journey!
Omg, this was like listening to my own story! 😮 Except that I worked as a freelance artist for ten years and then had to quit due to mental exhaustion. I took my first "normal" job in years last year and felt a huge relief after that. I lost my Northern star in life (the dream of being a full-time artist) and I don't really draw anymore but I hope I will find the spark again. I want to make art just for the self-indulgence as well. No pressure to succeed, just to have the luxury of being able to create. 🙂 Thank you for making this video! I think it's important to hear all kinds of stories and this definitely comforted me a lot. ❤
cheer up, for us!!
feel so tired and lost, and saw this video, thank you sooo much !! may we always be walking on flowery roads..
Your art is absolutely gorgeous, down to the perspective to the quiet, comfy way you illustrate things. I resonate greatly with you as I similarly left to pursue children's graphic novel work after art school, but found that environment had burned me out. I did freelancing for a while but it gave me the same anxiety you described, and got a stable job at an art agency thinking I would be better off with stability, but realized doing art for someone else was really hurting me. I recently got part time work at a retail job and started doing art more for me and I am far better emotionally than I have been since I left school eight years ago balancing the two. They say if you love what you do you will never work a day in your life, but in my experience its far better to leave what you love to things you are passionate about and be kind to your creative soul. I really wish you the best of luck with your comic cause I read and really resonate with your first one--its such a shame that editor discouraged you cause it really is quite special. I don't comment this much on things but your journey really got to me haha
I think it's heartbreaking that we live in this world where an artist as skilled, passionate and hard-working as yourself struggled so much to get paid for their work. I think you've reached a really good mindset now though and it's really inspiring!
Congratulations on finding a path that works better for you! It can be hard to take risks, especially when you tend to get very anxious. But it sounds like you took that experience, have grown from it and are continuing to grow now. I wish you the best!
When so many don’t try to change, just trying is a triumph. Treat yourself kindly today.
I was waiting for you to get to the part where you failed but it never came 🥺 I don't know if you chose this title for virality but I'd say your experience was a testament to your bravery and passion for art, not a failure at all!! Just give it more time and I'm sure you'll find more opportunities for your creative talents! You're inspiring and gave me a sense of peace for my own pursuit of my dreams
Hii bobo! ヽ(；▽；)ノ💕 Awee (>\\
Hey, I’m from Brazil and this one is probably my first time commenting on any video, but I just felt the need to say that sharing your journey this way is so courageous and inspiring at the same time! In my country art is really hard to pursue, it’s most commonly seen only as a hobby and nothing professional, probably not so different from other countries I guess.. but I’m still gonna try doing it, cuz experience and the courage to give the first step is something else! I’m rooting for your success 🎉
It could take you to a different country or city that would support your dreams more :) many cities in the world have more money to give to the arts. I hope you find those cities ❤
Hi!
I just honestly did the same thing as you just a few months ago, and I'm scared but also excited to finally pursue illustration again. It's so nice to see a kindred spirit. ;-;
I've been quite hard on myself recently, but this video just gave me the boost and kick I needed to tough it out! Thank you so much.
You didn't fail, you're brave and you're doing what it takes to pursue your dreams.
I know how you feel when you said you come home with little motivation to draw. After a long day at work staring at a computer all day its hard to find that inspiration. A lot of that has to do with the pressure to succeed as well. Have you considered a sidecareer in selling your works at conventions? They're usually on the weekend so it may provide a nice balance.
It’s okay I’m kind of in the same boat but barely started up my business. I had good savings to pursue my business but a series of unfortunate events happened to where I couldn’t work on my business enough and then the savings are running dry. Back to a 9-5 grind now.
I realized what I did was smart (having good savings before quitting my old job), but in all honesty I couldn’t have foreseen certain things - like a parent getting cancer…
As long as you learned skills along the way that helped you grow, it’s going be okay. I finally understand the saying, ‘The experience is the journey’. Hope you realize such now too.
And I’m still pursuing my business idea, but yeah on the side now too.
Women in business we got this! 💪
I love your content. I just started practicing illustration a few weeks back, just to find my human side by myself after getting bombarded by AI content, my workplace forcing me to use AI to survive...made me feel so lost..so i started a new project - i illustrate a Pride and Prejudice book from scratch. Make it the way *I* like without letting AI and tech giants dictating what I should and shouldn't do.
I saw this video twice. I am in the same boat as you, except that I am a writer. I havent left my job, but I only work part-time. The rest of my time I try to devote to my hobbies and passion but there is always the spectre that something may happen and that I need to find more work. Im not there yet but your story was very inspiring to me and is one of the best videos I have seen on RUclips. I feel like I have a lot to say. First of all, I think the messages you recieved from your parents got to you. They may have meant well but they are not an illustrator like you. You see the world uniquely and have stories to tell, a light in you that wants to come out. This is very special and needs to be nurtured. Like a seed it needs to grow. And the way you do that is with love. I saw your comics and they are really really good. You have ant style that is just pleasant to look at. I love your character designs and the attention to detail you put in your drawings. I just think that you need some crazy goal like doing 100 comics throughout your life or something like that. For sure then you would be making money. But yeah its a love and like being in love, when separated from it, life is less than life. Your really good, I think you'll be fine.
We love success stories. They inspire people to work towards their dreams. But how about the people that didn't succeed?
Thank you for sharing your life experience. It inspired me, and I wanna share my life experience to the void of internet too. Maybe I'll also make a video some day.
I'm an older dude that gave up my dreams of drawing, and animation because of financial struggles. Now, I'm trying to pursue my dreams again in my own ways.
Just knowing I'm not the only one is inspiring in its own way.
you have a lovely voice, it was very nice to hear your story while working. I identify with a lot you said, adding the pressure to make an income, specially a first source of income, to art, is so taxing for the process. I don’t think you failed, you tried it and realized it was not for you, and now you have a stable job that gives you a fixed income to be free to explore the art in the way however you want ❤ thank you so much for sharing!
That's one of the most important videos and comment session I've ever seen. Thank you so much for sharing ❤ I hope everything goes well for you, that you be happy, healthy and feel you're not alone 🤗
As a full time freelance illustrator for 4 years, it’s easier to make money by drawing what others want, like commissions and fanarts - which can be a sacrifice of ‘not drawing what you 100% want’ but can still be fun and great learning experiences! Original art is harder to gain interest but possible in ways like Patreon and Ko-fi. So I still feel like my original art is a side job 🤭 Definitely still always feel insecure even 4 years in 🫣
Not having a Plan is a big step to failure, Plans are always important, you need to investigate, search for the right decision and apply it step by step, maybe you should considerate looking for a illustrator job? This could work in the meantime you make your comic and you can learn a lot about how's illustration and comic market, yes! Investigate about these 2 markets Ilustration and comic and do it until you accomplish been a great Illustrator and a Great Comic creator! I wish you success and I give you strength to this Marvelous trip called been an Artist! 🌟
I found my fav artists and writers from series I already adored!
My first "all in" at a dream ended up flopping. It was disheartening when didn't go as I hoped. However my life needed structure so I double back into my old line of work to support myself while in the mean time going after my dream in my leisure hours. During this time, I have been saving money in order to either take time off to work on my dreams, or transition into something better. I plan to transition and leave by next year, take some months off to persue creativity full time and see how it feels. I don't expect myself to make money in that time off, but I feel like giving myself the time to do my creativity will be a gift to myself worth giving. I am aware of the pitfalls of negative self talk and fear- so this time around I feel a bit more confident in my decision. However, if I do need to double back into a 9-5 I am okay if things need to flow that way in order to support myself.
I was a Sculptor for 13 years. I was always thinking about how to sell my Models all my life but the thing with me is I always wanted to improve my Sculpting and I need to buy molding and casting because I don't want my models to break. BUT I Never sold Anything! At one point I found a Job for making toys and I messaged this toy company and they asked me to show them a picture of my model but I never did because I wasn't finished with my model so I messaged this toy company way...too soon. About five years earlier before 2024 I had an Eye Problem that I can no longer deal with Chemicals like Clay, Paint charcoals for drawings all that! I had to STOP EVERYTHING to do with Physical Art and only do Digital Art. My World went downhill for me because I was Only good with Physical Art not Digital Art so I had to Retrain Myself to do Digital Art. Digital Art is Awesome but let me tell You, NOTHING is more Amazing then to hold the Model of what I Physically created with my very own Hands! It was AMAZING and there's not a Day that goes by that I wished I can Physically Sculpt Again! To hold my own work like if I feel Sad I hold my Model, If I feel Happy I hold my Model in my hands as a celebration! So my Point to You is Money is important for everyone but you need to Expand your Artwork like instead of drawing a Cute object drawing something you Normally don't draw like something Manly or Aliens or something because that will Open your Mind and Eyes! I'm a Man, and I've sculpted some female people and bought female clothes for my female Models I've Sculpted. That is Weird RIGHT for me as a man? But guess what, it opens my mind that WOW it Showed Me just how Truly Beautiful Women's Truly are! Love your art, Expand your Art and don't focus too much on Money because your Skills and Open minded is something money can't buy! Your Video all I heard is Money, Money, Money. Let me ask you if you rather lose your Art Skills or have No Money which would you take? I'm pretty sure most people would take their Art Skills or their passions over Money. Money doesn't buy Happiness. So my life Now is about spreading my Art and Sculpting skills to my Nephews, Nieces and Relatives so when they grow up they'll be Amazing Artists as well. I take care of my parents and I don't make a dime from Art but again I do Digital Art as experience Nowadays. So if you can still do your Art DO IT Because the Worst thing that your body can tell you is "No more Art" like what my Eyes told me "No more Sculpting for Me....FOREVER! You Don't want that in your Soul.
i think the pressure of generating art out of ur passion does ruin ur creative momentum, how could it not be when ur starving and cant even lift your pen. So ofc money would lift ur worries and let you focus on creativity.
Watched the whole thing through. I do art but as a hobby, not really interested in making it into a job. I think the message her still applies to many people who don't want to be illustrators. Sometimes you just have to try stuff. It may not work, or it just might. It'll teach you things, show you new experiences, bring you out of certain headspaces or might even thrust you into new ones positive or negative. And maybe if you try you'll realize it's not for you. But if you think it might be, go for it.