I have just read that Barbara Pointon died in 2020 shortly after breaking her hip. She had been suffering from dementia "most probably Alzheimer's" for the final two years of her life. She was correct in saying that life isn't fair. She was an absolute angel and may she rest in peace.
Oh that’s so tragic! Thank God it was the last two years and not 15 years like her poor husband! I hope Barbara was able to find some sort of piece in between 2005 when Malcolm died and around 2018 it when she got dementia
trust me be glad life isn't fair we would all go through this if it was as horrible as this sounds glad that this isn't every1 fate it better when they don't know sad for the family tho
I'm so sorry for the couple, .What they had is a terrible. My Mother and Aunt had Alzheimers is really a long goodbye. My mother's was shorter, but she was 99 yrs old when it. really got bad, shy died at 101 yrs old. My aunt suffered for over 20 yrs.
Paul Watson needs to be given credit as well. He tread a very fine line between becoming almost a surrogate family member and remaining impartial for the sake of balancing the tone of the documentary. The result is utterly visceral. Well done Paul!
my darling husband asked me two days ago...'you won't leave me?'...He has been diagnosed with Alzheimer a little over a week ago...I responded '''I would never leave you Darling"...His smile and beautiful eyes...showed how comforted he was...23 yrs together....I suspected he had this illness for nearly 12 yrs...but refused to see a Specialist...now, in my research, I understand and feel so guilty for I thought he lost all common sense, in denial, agitated, etc etc...I need to forgive myself and just show him Grace and dignity as he deserves...
Barbra deserve more than a medal for all her her beautiful qualities, love, patience and dedication to the man she loved so very dearly. God bless you, Barbra I am sure you made a difference in helping your husband Malcolm to be in true peace knowing you cared so deeply for him.
Good god. My mother has Alzheimers at 97. I wish her grand old age to take her before the awfulness takes over. Such a shame this wonderful lady had the same.
My mother has dementia. I feel my mom left long time ago. I miss so much her previous personality I miss my Mother so much! Because she invested time and gave so much love, respect against all odds to me, no judgement only unconditional love . My mother is so loved, respected and looked after now that she can no longer take care of her self . It is challenging to care for patients with Alzheimers. They need love and unconditional love. Caregivers need support and a break as well. Take care folks.
She herself was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2018, and died June 21 last year (2020). What a heartbreaking reality this program presents us. He lived for 16 years after his diagnosis, she, for two. May their sons and grandchildren be delivered of ever having such a diagnosis or life.
My husband was hospitalized the last 3 months. Then he passed away. He had cried Please don't send me away. I only did when he collapsed. I spent days beside his bed. I just lost him moñths ago.I cry a lot. We were married 38 years.He was a cop for 33 years.I never want another man I am75 and get his full retirement if I never remarry.I have my son with me.I know your pain
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my grandfather to it in 2012, and he raised me in place of my father. It's so cruel and nothing can really prepare you for how you feel both during and after the passing. I found solace in trying new activities, which in my case were things like acrylic painting and nature walks. I also try to smile as much as I can because it helped me see just how precious every moment of my life is. I hope you find inner strength, peace, and happiness. God bless.
I'm literally over here crying over a man I didn't even know. Wow. As a healthcare provider myself this story really just hit me really hit me hard in the heart.
Indeed very sad. Crying too. I can imagine those who went through this illness without anyone to care for them. Malcolm was blessed to have his wife Barbara to the end.
My mother's final day... I begged the doctor to please end it as had this been my animal suffering I cld put it out of it's suffering so how much more so my beloved mom... he angrily said he cld'nt do anything even when I informed him that as a Nursing Sister she admitted to administering extra morphine to end the suffering of a patient... he looked at me and shortly after that she fell into a coma... I thanked him... I wld never divulge his name but am still grateful for his compassion....
Thank you for sharing this. My mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, but, fortunately, she only suffered a year of it. While I miss her, seeing this makes me grateful she never needed to go this far. It’s heartbreaking to watch someone once strong and vibrant falling so far from themselves. Love to Barbara.
Sad, many will never have someone to care for them, weather never married, wife doesn't care, no kids, other dies first. Will Barbra have someone to care for her. It's all sad!
@Southern Mema you are not the norm. Just because you did the honorable thing doesn't mean, most Americans do. I've seen old people cast aside to die in a facility. Outa sight outa mind.
I am going through this right now with my Husband. I am his caregiver 24/7. He has early onset Atypical MSA Parkinson's. No help, Medicaid only covers 1 hour per week. Not sure how long I can do this. A very lonely place to be. God Bless you for taking care of him as long as you could💜
@@ksbordersjville "how cruel." No! The way big business and greedy shareholders profit off the backs of the sick in the USA isn't cruel. It's a bloody disgrace! How a so-called "civilized" country can treat its people this way is beyond comprehension. What has politics got to do with basic decency and humanity? Why not just keep bare-faced Capitalism away from the suffering of others?
Big virtual hugs i lost my dad to this horrible disease I felt I lost a bit of myself when he left he was one of the most beautiful men I've ever had the pleasure of knowing and proud to be his daughter.
*DEMENTIA CURE:* Thanks for sharing some of your own story. I am a 74-year-old man, I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease 15 years ago, I always like to use my experience in a positive way to educate others. It is common knowledge that Alzheimer's robs people of their ability to remember. Having dementia for me was lonely, isolating and scary. But when people share their stories, it can provide inspiration, hope and a welcome reminder that you are not alone. Homeocure Worldwide is natural cure medicine. The professional had earlier told me there is no cure, I asked a professional to explain this to me? They said it is a miracle. All the patients I have directed to Homeocure Worldwide return with thanks. Don't let drug companies keep you as a slave to their mediocre medications. Don't let them tell you there's nothing that will help you. Today I can say that I'm living life instead of surviving it. For more info, contact Homeocure Worldwide
I lost my father to Alzheimer's in 2001. It was a five year journey for him/us. Thankfully he received excellent care (my parents lived in an apartment in a fantastic senior retirement place. My mother lived ten years after his passing and her mind was completely sharp til the end. From what I understand we were very fortunate as dad never showed any aggression or anger. Before Alzheimer's, he was a gentle soul and that never changed. He was much different from some of the behavior we see from Malcolm in this video. I'm very grateful not to have experienced that. Barbara took so much on herself, she was in dire need of respite throughout. I'm sorry to hear about Barbara's passing from the same illness.
I hope their children know what a wonderful woman their mother was. Truly someone who helped make the world a better place for others. May she and Malcolm rest in eternal peace.
Denny Smith ,this lady was full of abounding love for Malcolm.She had to have some wonderful years with him in the past.I guess if u get enough love and caring from someone you can give back without limits.The end of this was difficult to watch.
Not if it's killing you too. Like Malcolm my father must have had this from a very early age.It takes a massive toll on the carer and in our case, the children too. Of course no one expects a young, otherwise very healthy and active man to have Alzheimers so it took forever to have it diagnosed. The whole time we thought my father was just an awful person and that our mother was out of her mind for staying with him. I mean we didn't even remember him being normal so how else would we know he hadn't always been, well lets just say not great. Anyway apart from the violence aimed at Barbara, my mother wasn't physically abused by my father, he actually started out a very aggressive person to every one and became softer and softer as the disease progressed. Oh and yes like Malcolm the total opposite to his normal personality (as we knew him any way) My mother had an autoimmune disease and another very painful condition besides that. The absolute worst thing for autoimmune diseases is stress, it makes any autoimmune disease worse and my poor mum had plenty of stress with my father and her mother needing to be cared for at the very same time. My mother had both my grand mother and my father to look after together. Them both being the most demanding and least appreciative creatures on earth. My father with Dementia and my grandmother....... Well let me explain. My grandmother was 83 and had been living on her own and so was doing very well. She got unsteady on her feet and was told to use a walker. She went out one day without my mother and apparently wasn't using her walker and fell and shattered her knee. The Dr's wouldn't operate to fix her knee because they thought she was too old and would most certainly die on the table. Effectively them not wanting to operate on her made her bed bound and because my mother absolutely couldn't care for her physically, any more she had to go into a nursing home. My mother was physically unabIe to care for her once she couldn't walk, or do much of anything for herself any more. ( my grandmother lived until she was 98 and did end up having the surgery, which certainly didn't kill her) Unfortunately because she had been bed bound for too long, and she never walked again and had to stay in the nursing home. My father became too much for my mother too. After only 1 month being in the nursing home another man in the nursing home attacked my father and he fell and broke his hip. They thought he would be fine with surgery but all the drugs they gave him finished the job that Alzheimers started. We all think as terrible as it was a broken hip was a blessing in disguise. It was better for him and every one else that it didn't drag on and on, because I am sure my mother would have carried on caring for him until it killed her too. I don't think any one one would want that to happen. She deserves to enjoy the rest of her life. She had cared for others since she was 8 years old, would you people have had her die still caring or maybe die even before my father?
@Southern Mema Thanks, you seem like you are an empathetic as well as sensible person. There was so much more to our story that could speak to my mothers decency. Life is so much more complicated than just staying with your husband no matter what. If I believed in an all knowing, all loving God, or any God at all I would say that he saw my mother was going to kill herself trying to care for both my father and grandmother at once, so he acted. I don't believe in God though and I was just glad my mother got a break for once in her life.
@Southern Mema Thanks for your comment. Oh so much more to our story, than the simplification I wrote. You sound like a sensible and empathetic human being.................so rare in the comments section of RUclips, So glad to have come across you.
Love and care has to be unconditional. I see this and I truly am homesick for my Nursing days at the Geriatric homes. I felt I had a place there everyday, the warm smiles and greetings no matter how jumbled made sense to me because I would look in their eye's and search for their light. You grow so much in your youth from learning how precious life is, to have sweet and gentle compassion. I still have a tender place for elderly in my heart. The wonderful stories I was blessed with from some of the residents were the most wise, profound, hilarious, and memorable. What treasures we have in these aged persons, what blessed treasures. May God bless and ease their burdens.
I find this story to be so profoundly, deeply, emotionally painful that I literally feel weak...How I long to wrap my arms around Barbara in a comforting & loving embrace...I pray she's made great strides in healing her heart, & that perhaps she's found such enduring love again...
This is what dad went through while he looked after mum.I called him after I watched this documentary and I talked to him how much he means to me and how much I love him and we were talking for 3 hours ❤️ Thanks !
I worked for twelve years looking after people like Malcolm in residential care. I am in my late sixties now, and knowing what I know about the reality of dementia I will take my own life before I lose the ability to do it.
I worked just as a cleaner in a care home aged 17-23. It’s worse than cancer the only death I saw that was worse than dementia and it was a lady with every arthritis in her whole body who slowly died in agony in bed. With bed sores to the bone all over her back. It’s horrific, human enthansia is much more kind than keeping you alive that sick.
Dementia is a "living" death... you witness the inexorable loss of everything you hold dear about your loved one. What's worse is fact that you can do NOTHING to stop or slow down the progression of the disease. It truly doesn't matter how much you love that person because dementia is a incredibly cruel and heartless disease.
*DEMENTIA CURE:* Thanks for sharing some of your own story. I am a 74-year-old man, I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease 15 years ago, I always like to use my experience in a positive way to educate others. It is common knowledge that Alzheimer's robs people of their ability to remember. Having dementia for me was lonely, isolating and scary. But when people share their stories, it can provide inspiration, hope and a welcome reminder that you are not alone. Homeocure Worldwide is natural cure medicine. The professional had earlier told me there is no cure, I asked a professional to explain this to me? They said it is a miracle. All the patients I have directed to Homeocure Worldwide return with thanks. Don't let drug companies keep you as a slave to their mediocre medications. Don't let them tell you there's nothing that will help you. Today I can say that I'm living life instead of surviving it. For more info, contact Homeocure Worldwide
Same here x although it's heart breaking its an absolute honour for me and I love our residents like family x have such deep love and smiles even though they are going through this, bless them
Thank you for adding this film. I've not watched it since broadcast for personal reasons. But tonight, for whatever reason, I decided to, despite owning my own copy on DVD. Which I've never watched. The story behind this film is just as important as its message, contrary to the media hell that surrounded its second release in 2007. Paul Watson painstakingly filmed the family over many, many years. There was no direction or mission, just the truth of this horrific illness. Paul turned up and pointed his camera at what happened, however brutal. He even chose to film it by himself, no lighting or sound person - just him and a camera using, at the time, the latest Sony digital camera. Not to be clever but because he cared that Malcolm would not react well to a full film crew surrounding him. Paul was a family member. Paul is a wonderful, sensuous and caring filmmaker - not the hard story-chasing hack some would have you believe. He points a camera and lets the pictures tell the story. Malcolm is my father. The music on this film is all his composition. I am his youngest son - the one who did 'nothing' and kept 'putting it away'. Still doing that!! Paul has my utmost, utmost respect for this film. He is a gentlemen, an artist and a filmmaker only ever interested in the truth. Thank you for putting the film up here. However painful it is, this film lays bare the truth of this evil illness. People, and the powers that be, need to understand how brutal the world of Alzheimer's is.
MrSoaringMan thank you for sharing your Mom and Dad with us. My grandma had dementia and it was so sad to watch her just slip away. She was gone long before she passed away. Such an awful disease. Beautiful documentary 💕
MrSoaringMan Thank you for sharing. It brings a very clear, concise, and often painful reminder to love as much as we can because we never know when we will not have our loved ones taken. I commend you and thank you. God Bless You and loved ones.
Where were their 2 sons???!!!! How could they let their mother suffer to exhaustion that way??? They should be ashamed of themselves. That woman gives us all an amazing example of unconditional love that marriage should represent
I lost my dad two months ago. He was diagnosed with slow progression dementia several years ago, but 3 weeks before he died he was diagnosed with stage 4 metastatic prostate cancer (by the time it was found it was in his bones, brain, and most internal organs) My sweet 15yo son made the statement “I’m glad it was something quick that took him and he got to go knowing who we all were and that we were there, and he got to take most of his memories with him”
Mark Haywood thank you for your kind words and thank you for a lifetime of giving to others. I also hope that soon that option is available to people, I’m here for you mark,
*DEMENTIA CURE:* Thanks for sharing some of your own story. I am a 74-year-old man, I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease 15 years ago, I always like to use my experience in a positive way to educate others. It is common knowledge that Alzheimer's robs people of their ability to remember. Having dementia for me was lonely, isolating and scary. But when people share their stories, it can provide inspiration, hope and a welcome reminder that you are not alone. Homeocure Worldwide is natural cure medicine. The professional had earlier told me there is no cure, I asked a professional to explain this to me? They said it is a miracle. All the patients I have directed to Homeocure Worldwide return with thanks. Don't let drug companies keep you as a slave to their mediocre medications. Don't let them tell you there's nothing that will help you. Today I can say that I'm living life instead of surviving it. For more info, contact Homeocure Worldwide
This is a true example of a woman honoring her wedding vows, despite his physical aggression, his hateful words to her, and “losing” the man she married. Barbara, you are an inspiration
My mom had sundowners. It was the hardest thing to watch for her to go thru. When she past I was called horrible things by people who didnt understand that it wasnt a sad thing for her it was a relief because she wasnt the person who raised me. I Love her....
My sister in law is suffering from Alzheimer’s Disease too. She still can stand a conversation. I started watching this Documentary to learn and understand how it develops, so I can be with her as much as possible. Thanks so much for sharing your lives adventure with the rest of the world! We are all siblings in our Lord’s Love. I’m sure both Malcolm and Barbara are well together up in Heaven! God bless you guys!!! ❤❤❤
I'm afraid she was NOT brave when it really counted...she put her own needs before Malcolm's when she lets 'love gets in the way' of mercy...she couldn't let him go (due to her own selfish need to keep him alive even though he is suffering to the extreme.). IF she was so brave, she would have let him pass away sooner with the little dignity he still had left.
Lynette what was she supposed to do? Overdose him? Smother him in his sleep? Have him starved earlier on so he would’ve died faster? I mean honestly, what other humane options did she have? No, she wasn’t selfish! If she was selfish, she would’ve thrown him in a home and forgotten about him. Instead she loved him and stayed with him throughout it all.
It’s amazing how much music is an innate part of him. Even though his brains and communication are failing him, he can still play the piano so beautifully.
My mother is exactly the same. She’s 96 and it began last year. It’s been quite rapid. I’m 67 and her son, and moved back from the USA to live with her and look after her when she had cancer years ago, and now I’m taking care of her with Alzheimers. I don’t regret it and declined help which was offered from the District Nurses and Dementia Unit as my mother gets distressed when anyone visits. Yes it’s difficult when she gets aggressive and violent, but I’ve had to become more detached when this happens and not take it personally. She used to teach and it’s heartbreaking to see her now, a shell of her former self. She is sometimes coherent and can have brief discussions, other times screaming and talking gibberish, cuddling a giant toy dog. I don’t see this as a duty, just a journey we are completing from when she looked after me, and now our situations are reversed. I look for no pity or praise, it’s just a fact of life, and I’m fortunate to have had so many good memories of her. None of us are here for very long, and it brings into reality how pointless our accumulation of possessions are, and the need to prioritize. In the end there’s only love that’s left, and ‘our little lives are rounded with a sleep’.
You are so correct. Thanks a lot for sharing a very beautiful true account of caring for your mother and the reality of life that Love is truly what plays the role when a person is no longer able to take care of himself.
Such a wonderful woman, she was loving and devoted to her husband beyond compare. The blessing is that they were reunited once again in their love until eternity.
Barbara, you are an amazing woman. I wish everyone who had an illness such as this or dementia had a person like you to care for them. I don't know what else to say that would not just seem redundant. My heart goes out to you.
It’s so very familiar to me. I helped care for my dad as he grappled with Lewy Body Dementia. It was a nightmare. So much of what poor Barbara dealt with is exactly what we dealt with. The only difference is my dad would have ups and downs, with periods of mental clarity and physical normalcy for several weeks at a time, every so often, right until the end. My poor dad expressed such fear and anxiety when he was able to express it. This breaks my heart, and I wish that no one ever had to endure such misery. It’s a monstrous disease.
Hi, Valerie, My Dad Kelvin suffered from Lewy Body Dementia and died in 2018 Aged 80 I was his first born Son, and as i lived close, helped my mum care for him. Watching his physical decline and general sadness and confusion. My mum did have a hard time looking after him but wanted to keep him at home as this was his wish and my wish too for him to be at home as it was home! Much of my help meant I would drive him around daily if I could, hold his hand while walking, help dress and go to the toilet. The Palliative care in his last week was so good and comforting knowing I many changes to say goodbye, now I remember his faith, love and family life. 😊
its an evil disease. it distroys the person ever so slowly, inch by inch. l live with my parent when l was in my 20's after my marriage fell apart while there my grandfather was moved in. it wasnt too bad at the start, but slowly it turned him into a stranger. he was put into a home. he didnt knows us for awhile then he did. it was so very sad, heartbreaking. all the best to all those carers and families who go through this its a nightmare
It's horrible.. worse is the early onset alzheimers.. Imagine having a loved one in his/her 50s diagnosed & living with this, whilst kids graduating, getting married & having kids themselves.. Truly awful..
My mum was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s,the first year she lost all her friends as she became paranoid and combative and frankly very hard to manage. She was always threatening to kill her self and eventually she did by throwing her self down three flights of stairs,the long goodbye they call it😞
Ive never seen a stronger willed woman than Barbara she was very amazing, her husband a fighter to the end, I find it heart wrenching this disease steals our loved ones from us, life isnt fair, and life is long at the shortest, God bless this lovely family
Beautiful family and wife. As a retired nurse, I appreciate her analysis of the abuse of patients in steeling funds away from supportive care to people with Alzheimer’s and other debilities diseases. Yes, it takes much love to persist in care. Such care givers need care also. God bless you.
I never comment on RUclips videos but this documentary is by far the most touching , emotional programme I’ve ever seen ❤ what an amazing women Barbara was ♥️ Alzheimer’s is an evil disease !
The fact he was still able to play the piano is amazing and also troubling because he couldn't do much of anything else. Seeing him be combative with Barbra was hard to watch.
this summer my husband has been diagnosed with same condition by the Addenbrooke's team in Cambridge too. He has issues with understanding and processing language but at the moment it's quite mild . By the end of the film about Malcolm I was in tears for him and for Barbara. But also tears for what will happen to my husband too. I look at him now and find it hard that it will go like that as at the moment he is independant and driving. Most of the time is fine. We have good support from a lovely Dementia nurse for basic information. Thank you for this film that sadly shows the raw reality of this wicked disease that robs people's mind, thoughts and awareness of life and their surroundings. So very sad for Malcolm as so gifted and talented man.
I have to be honest with you. You should get help now. For both of you and all family members. Nurses and therapists to talk to. Each time it will get worse, it will be like a new death. At the end you'll be "glad" it's all over. Plz don't hate yourself for that coz you're probably a very good person.
In Australia we have day care for those suffering from this and other diseases. Govt funded. So the carer as well as in home help can have time out for themselves - to keep their mental and physical wellbeing in line
Even towards the end, his skin still looked in remarkably good condition. It is clear that Barbara cared for him so much despite how difficult he was to care for. Rest In Peace Barbara and Malcolm.
Stephanie Richards , ... I’ve stopped caring what goes through people’s minds when they dislike. I’m sick of having to digest everyone’s opinion on every subject. It was not like this before the Internet. It can be overwhelming. And after watching this video, I feel gutted, so I just couldn’t care less about stupid ppl and their opinions on everything. They must think that anybody noticing their feedback, will give a toss about it. Nope. I don’t.
I'm so deeply honored that you let us into your lives to show the world this horrible disease. Barbara I hope that you as well have found happiness in your life, you were a loving and respectful and caring wife, whom til the end took such devoted and loving care of Malcolm. You will be in my prayers dear lady 🙏❤
My heart goes out to you Barbara, I thought my story was worst but watching you! God bless you for taking such a good care of your husband. I took care of my husband until he took his final breath at forty one he was six years older than me, God and my family have been my strength raising very very young kids.
Barbara, you are a true inspiration to anyone who has to take care of a loved one suffering from Alzheimer's or dementia; God bless you for helping us all to understand xx
Thank you Barbara for showing us what Alzheimer’s is and how it takes effort, love and patience to take care of their loved ones. Bless her family 🙏🏼❤️ she was such an angel.
This is truly heart breaking, my Grandmother which was my Mother's mom had Alzheimer's, my Mother had Dementia. And yes, it can run in families, 2 years ago my Dr told me i have Alzheimer's. Oh i can see some changes, but i told my Dr that both Mom and my Grandmother took meds, it didn't help, so I told him i don't want anything, he smiled at me and he agreed with my decision. I gave care to both of them, and i have no regrets. May my sweet Mama and Granny Rest in Peace. My Father who passed with cancer, may he Reast in Peace also. ❤️ 🌹 ❤️
I worked in Nursing Homes and saw staff yelling at people like him. They are in the wrong profession. These people need love and nurturing and understanding. It just made me cry. They can't help it. The poor wife. What a trooper. It is hard living with this. That poor man. Love and Prayers for both of you!
I couldn’t imagine my husband like that,, it would shatter me and me as a person my whole life would stop. This wife has strength to keep pushing forward and i admire her for it.
I watched my great grandma, grandma and grandfather slowly deteriorate from it. I lost the three people in my life who truly cared and loved me. 1993, 2007 and 2016 are the years I lost them. It broke me when I visited my grandma in the nursing home and she was afraid of me because she didn't recognize me. It absolutely broke me.
I’m sorry for your losses. The grandma you knew is gone, that is why there is no recognition and only fear is left. Try to come to terms with the fact that she has already died, even though her body is still alive.
This documentary is extremely moving. I truly hope that it will help folks get better help and care. Barbara. ...you are an amazingly strong, loving human being! We didn't get to see much of Malcolm before Alzheimers, but I can tell he was definitely an amazing person! Many blessings to you all!
This story was probably the best, and most real Real Stories that I've ever seen! It was just beautifully put together with such a loving couple. Thank you Paul! Thank you for your entire 11 years you put into this story! JUST BEAUTIFULLY DONE!
Oh thank you so much for putting this on youtube. I saw this on telly and looked for it for a long time with no luck. The experience of this couple feels so like the reality of the disease. My mum had early onset and my dad looked after her until it became completely impossible. The decline of Malcolm, his behavior and symptoms so closely mirror those of my mother its quite heartbreaking. If someone has no idea about this disease I think this film more than anything else I have seen will take you on the inevitable journey that awaits everyone who loves someone with Alzheimers
Barbara is an angel, her voice is soothing and amazing. It's almost like a song. I'm not surprised she and Malcolm fell in love with each other. It's perfect. I'm so ashamed of nature, and of the fact that Alzheimer's did this to them. It's so absurd, and so sad. His son is amazingly talented and I'm crossing my fingers for him, that he did well for himself with the absolute talent that his dad imparted on him. The entire family is gorgeous. Sad, but gorgeous. I had a family member in this position, and it was heartbreaking. They did the best they could, and more than most. I admire them.
Barbra was an Angel. Malcom was so lucky to have a woman with a heart of gold. Saddly Barbara has passed now, in 2020 i think. Im sure she suffered with Dementia in the end. RIP Malcom & Barbara together again, pain free 🕊🙏
Such a shame for Malcolm and others who go through this horrible death, Barbara is an inspiration to others, looking at Malcolm at the end and how ill and thin he was, i do not understand how any one can let another person suffer like this, why keep him alive and in pain for so long is cruel, if your pet was dying and in pain the first place you would go to is your vet and help your pet to die peacefully ....I truly think more should be done to help people like Malcolm die with dignity and without pain. Bless you Barbara and for taking care of your husband.
I think that anyone that crosses the street to avoid saying hello to them or chat when someone is in a situation like this and (she might just want some comfort by a friendly talk ) is utterly disgusting and it really shows your true self you should be proud We need more like you around
As a nurse, I remember a family member becoming angry at the care staff for not doing things to her satisfaction, she was always so demanding and angry at us. We never had enough staff. The family just couldn't handle it and decided she could give better care at home so he took her hubby home to care for him. Three months later her husband returned to the facility. The wife looked so tired and haggered. She never complained to the staff again. This is the hardest but most fulfilling job I've ever had. 😔
I thought that Malcolm was in his 70's. Barbara? At least in her 60's. This illness certainly took its toll on each of them. It must have started in his late 30's! He kept mentioning a strange 'vision.' So whatever his Alzheimer's is, it began with hallucinations. There's got to be some kind of abnormal deposit of proteins that the body attacks, perhaps similar to an autoimmune process.
No, Barbara was born 1939 and Malcolm 1940. He was 51 when diagnosed with Alzheimer. At the time they documented this they are in their late 60:s and hen was 67 when he dies. Barbara died recently in 2020 at the age of almost 81.
English (British) people usually looks older than what they really are I remember when i was 10 when i lived in Belgium i had a teacher who was pregnant. I thought to myself why this old woman pregnant come to find out she wasnt even in her 40tis she was in her 30tis But yea english people age faster than thier age
What a beautiful wife, women, soft spoken, intelligent, kind and compassionate person they must have been best friends and had a tremendous love between them most women would have walked away forgetting about the love and life they had sometimes taking other men before they even died she truly still loves this man until he died Barbara no amount of the violence she was put through but continued to be there every step of the way until the very end so that he could die in dignity i
I’ve been careing for dementia and Alzheimer’s residents for over 30 years! Ive watched them over time deteriorate. Very hard at times to watch, especially the family photos around there rooms! Old Wedding photos, family photos really bring everything home. Bless them & there families🌺🌸🌼
*DEMENTIA CURE:* Thanks for sharing some of your own story. I am a 74-year-old man, I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease 15 years ago, I always like to use my experience in a positive way to educate others. It is common knowledge that Alzheimer's robs people of their ability to remember. Having dementia for me was lonely, isolating and scary. But when people share their stories, it can provide inspiration, hope and a welcome reminder that you are not alone. Homeocure Worldwide is natural cure medicine. The professional had earlier told me there is no cure, I asked a professional to explain this to me? They said it is a miracle. All the patients I have directed to Homeocure Worldwide return with thanks. Don't let drug companies keep you as a slave to their mediocre medications. Don't let them tell you there's nothing that will help you. Today I can say that I'm living life instead of surviving it. For more info, contact Homeocure Worldwide
I lost my grandmother to Alzheimer's three and a half years ago and I've also worked with those suffering and it is suffering dementia. Barbara, her love and determination to care for her husband is what true love is. This was filmed a long time ago but what would happen to Malcolm if she wasn't there as his champion? Over medicated or given medication that was clearly having a detrimental effect on his wellbeing, Barbara was doing a better job seeing the harmful effect the meds were having on him over the doctors!. Dementia is one of the very cruelest diseases alongside MND. The families would come to visit their loved ones and I will never forget the pain on one daughters face when her parent didn't recognise or interact with her yet responded to the staff. My Gran travelled the journey very much like Malcom. She had a UTI and was taken to respite care where she attacked two members of staff and broke two windows with a walking stick she found. That night she was escorted off the property by the police and taken to a psych ward. She was never aggressive as herself but Alzheimer's took her down that path as it does with many. It took a couple of years for them to get her meds right and by that point she was in a care home, she wasn't capable to look after herself and home care just wasn't enough. Where Malcom remembered the piano my Gran remembered her cats some from my early memories. Alzheimer's and the UTI's took their hold (they often go hand in hand and have a severe effect) and over two weeks she had two major heart attacks, the first of which the doctors couldn't believe didn't kill her, the usual UTI and she even beat sepsis. She suddenly became very tired like her body had just had enough and she passed away a few days later. My last contact with her was on FaceTime and for all she was very much like Malcolm and nonverbal at that point when she heard my voice she opened her eyes and smiled that devilish smile I grew up seeing. If the comment below is true to Malcolm' and Barbara's sons I'm so sorry for your loss, your parents were wonderful people
Malcolm looked at the end like my dad did when he came back from the Burma Siam railway in the Second World War. It took the love of a woman to get him back on his feet so that he was able to live a reasonably normal life although he was ill most of his life and died quite young. My parents were an inspirational couple and I was privelaged to care for my mother in the last few years of her life after she developed dementia and had strokes. It is a gift from God to be able to care for a loved one
It is a privilege. God gives us very little we can do for our parents, but this is according to His plan.It would be wrong to expect a stranger to care for someone who has loved you and given you life. terribly difficult, but you have the assurance that you have done all you can, and loved them at the same time.
It's heart wrenching to see Malcolm changing before our eyes; my heart breaks for Barbara, though she is so strong. My parents just moved to back to Holland, they're 71 & 74, & my biggest fear is this reality happening to them.
Barbara is an amazing and remarkable human being! So very sad to watch what both Malcom and Barbara had to endure. But thankful Barbara was willing to share such a personal and intimate time in their lives in order to help others to understand the what Alzheimer’s is really like.
Barbara was an absolute Saint! I am almost angry at the sons and my heart hurts for Barbara, knowing she tried with every single breath to do this on her own.
What a wonderful , loving woman she was, she never gave up looking after him and in his final days she was still comforting him and stroking him to keep him calm, how lovely. My mum now has dementia and we are having her and my father move in with us and I hope I can give them as much love as Barbara did as they are wonderful parents. What a good example she was.
I watched my parents die within 5 months of each other. It was sad seeing their health deteriorate over the years but they didn't loose their mind to Alzheimer's or Demintia. I could not imagine anyone that has to watch their loved one's go through such a process. It would kill me inside to watch such a thing and I commend anyone that has to go through this. God bless the families that are faced with this situation.
Drakos 67 ~ it happened quickly with my mother. At times, it was heartbreaking. I watch the fear in her eyes when even some of her children would visit and she didn’t know them. She would look at me with fear in her eyes, look to m e to be sure I was going to protect her. At times it was amusing, such as when she constantly told me how she was keeping track of her family by watching them on television as cameras followed them around...it wasn’t happening, but the things that came out of her mouth were funny. Also heartbreaking was preparing for the funeral of my sister, the youngest of my mother’s many children. My niece was curling my mother’s hair and my mother looked up at me, asking about my sister, “Do you think she’ll show up for this thing? You know how she hates these family gatherings”. I assured my mother that my sister would be there. My mother’s siblings and very close friends, started dying, there came a point where my siblings and I decided that telling her about deaths was only giving her pain, we no longer told her. Perhaps the most heartbreaking was walking into her room and she was sitting up on the side of the bed, she was making piles of toilet paper squares. I asked, “Whatchadoin mom, do you need something”...My mother looked at me and said, “I’m keeping my hands busy. You know, I’m going to die and the only thing I wish for is to see my mother before I die and take her for a walk on the beach. You could go too, I know how much you love the ocean. It’s not very far you know”. My heart shattered, my Memere had been dead for many years at that point, my mother was born and raised in Maine and as a child, she almost drowned which caused her to hate water and never learn to swim. I told her that I would check into making plans. I was blessed that my mother never forgot who I was and that when the last breath left her and she stepped through the gates of Heaven, I was there, at her side. I’ll see her when I get there! ❤️🌻❤️
katebaby100 ~ I’m very sorry to hear this. I’ll give some really good advice...when people say, “You should go home, she doesn’t know you’re here. Tell them “I know I’m here”. Please never stop praying and never stop being there for her. 🙏🙏🌹🌻🌹🙏🙏
katebaby100 ~ I’m sorry, that’s a tough situation to be in. Luckily, my mother didn’t ever have to go into a nursing home. I hope you visit her often and I’m sure she knows you love her. 🙏🙏❤️🙏🙏
Malcolm is my age. I just turned 57. I often think about how young I still feel. Alzheimers has got to be one of the cruelest things that can go wrong with us. I felt so sad for Barbara. I think many times, the Doctors over medicate the patients, so they don't have to deal with them. I have a mentally disabled daughter, and that has happened to her. The whole thing is just heartbreaking.
Barbara. You are such a beautiful person. I lost my darling husband after 55 years of marriage a few months ago to Dementia. After 6 years of home caring I put him into a most wonderful private nursing home. He was there for three years. The deteriation over the years was heart breaking. It brought back so many memories. After watching it, I just broke down and sobbed. The love, care and support I got was wonderful. This dreadful illness is slowly being recognised thank god . Charities have been set up, but we still urgently need Goxverment to put more money into care. Kindest regards to a truly inspirational lady ❤
I've worked in the care sector and I must confess looking after those with dementia especially in the advanced stages is emotionally draining, it really was for me the hardest part of the job, it often left me teary eyed and for me it was a job I could go home from & have holidays from whereas loved ones who are carers don't get to home, they are at home... I have so much respect and admiration for Barbara and all carers who care so selflessly for their relatives, it really is like a living death. Such a terrible illness.
*DEMENTIA CURE:* Thanks for sharing some of your own story. I am a 74-year-old man, I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease 15 years ago, I always like to use my experience in a positive way to educate others. It is common knowledge that Alzheimer's robs people of their ability to remember. Having dementia for me was lonely, isolating and scary. But when people share their stories, it can provide inspiration, hope and a welcome reminder that you are not alone. Homeocure Worldwide is natural cure medicine. The professional had earlier told me there is no cure, I asked a professional to explain this to me? They said it is a miracle. All the patients I have directed to Homeocure Worldwide return with thanks. Don't let drug companies keep you as a slave to their mediocre medications. Don't let them tell you there's nothing that will help you. Today I can say that I'm living life instead of surviving it. For more info, contact Homeocure Worldwide
Johnson Jack Enough of the advertising, “Jack.” You’ve advertised your product repeatedly in the comments here and it starts to come across as crass. You made your point.
@@johnsonjack4611 please stop posting about this....at present there is NO cure so your constant comments in this comment section are completely inappropriate and actually verging on exploitative.
My gradatude to that lonely man who did the video my deepest respect for his compacionet heart to be able to film this, thank you for an amazing job! God bless you
omg so sad that women was such a lovely person life can be so cruel it's hard enough to grow old then for this to happen. R.I.P Malcolm hope barbara knows how wonderful she is can't imagine so hard it must have being God Bless you and your family
I have just read that Barbara Pointon died in 2020 shortly after breaking her hip. She had been suffering from dementia "most probably Alzheimer's" for the final two years of her life. She was correct in saying that life isn't fair. She was an absolute angel and may she rest in peace.
Oh that’s so tragic! Thank God it was the last two years and not 15 years like her poor husband! I hope Barbara was able to find some sort of piece in between 2005 when Malcolm died and around 2018 it when she got dementia
trust me be glad life isn't fair we would all go through this if it was as horrible as this sounds glad that this isn't every1 fate it better when they don't know sad for the family tho
If sure hope that some family took as good care of her!!!!
I'm so sorry for the couple, .What they had is a terrible. My Mother and Aunt had Alzheimers is really a long goodbye. My mother's was shorter, but she was 99 yrs old when it. really got bad, shy died at 101 yrs old. My aunt suffered for over 20 yrs.
@@angelbabysqueaky3985 oh! Your poor aunt!! And poor you all. 💔
Paul Watson needs to be given credit as well. He tread a very fine line between becoming almost a surrogate family member and remaining impartial for the sake of balancing the tone of the documentary.
The result is utterly visceral. Well done Paul!
my darling husband asked me two days ago...'you won't leave me?'...He has been diagnosed with Alzheimer a little over a week ago...I responded '''I would never leave you Darling"...His smile and beautiful eyes...showed how comforted he was...23 yrs together....I suspected he had this illness for nearly 12 yrs...but refused to see a Specialist...now, in my research, I understand and feel so guilty for I thought he lost all common sense, in denial, agitated, etc etc...I need to forgive myself and just show him Grace and dignity as he deserves...
Barbra deserve more than a medal for all her her beautiful qualities, love, patience and dedication to the man she loved so very dearly. God bless you, Barbra I am sure you made a difference in helping your husband Malcolm to be in true peace knowing you cared so deeply for him.
0
She passed away I believe 12 years later, from the same thing. Just so sad. She was a remarkable woman.
Good god. My mother has Alzheimers at 97. I wish her grand old age to take her before the awfulness takes over. Such a shame this wonderful lady had the same.
@@beckyshebesta3567 oh god no 😔
She honored her vows, "in sickness an in health" very rare thing these days
My mother has dementia. I feel my mom left long time ago. I miss so much her previous personality I miss my Mother so much! Because she invested time and gave so much love, respect against all odds to me, no judgement only unconditional love . My mother is so loved, respected and looked after now that she can no longer take care of her self . It is challenging to care for patients with Alzheimers. They need love and unconditional love. Caregivers need support and a break as well. Take care folks.
@@ggav2356 Oraying 🙏🏽for you and yours.
She herself was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2018, and died June 21 last year (2020). What a heartbreaking reality this program presents us. He lived for 16 years after his diagnosis, she, for two. May their sons and grandchildren be delivered of ever having such a diagnosis or life.
I agree.
Amen🙏🏽✝️
My husband was hospitalized the last 3 months. Then he passed away. He had cried Please don't send me away. I only did when he collapsed. I spent days beside his bed. I just lost him moñths ago.I cry a lot. We were married 38 years.He was a cop for 33 years.I never want another man I am75 and get his full retirement if I never remarry.I have my son with me.I know your pain
God bless you🙏
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my grandfather to it in 2012, and he raised me in place of my father. It's so cruel and nothing can really prepare you for how you feel both during and after the passing. I found solace in trying new activities, which in my case were things like acrylic painting and nature walks. I also try to smile as much as I can because it helped me see just how precious every moment of my life is. I hope you find inner strength, peace, and happiness. God bless.
@Ron Harris I was thinking the same the way her wording was but idk.
God Bless you 🙏
I doubt it helps, but you are in my heart and I would hope you find a happy time and good memories. Sorry.
I'm literally over here crying over a man I didn't even know. Wow. As a healthcare provider myself this story really just hit me really hit me hard in the heart.
Raymond Burton Me too , I’m sitting with tears in my eyes
Laverda Jota me too, towards the end it was hard to watch
Indeed very sad. Crying too. I can imagine those who went through this illness without anyone to care for them. Malcolm was blessed to have his wife Barbara to the end.
😭😰 I wish they could have find some kind of cure one day because this so painful for everyone and even harder for the family and caregivers.
💜💗🙏🏻💜
What a loving wife to be by the side of her husband to soothe him care for him body and soul. God Bless You both.
What a wonderful story of love, loyalty and devotion. You are an amazing lady Barbara.
She passed away in 2020 after falling and breaking her hip. She to was sadly diagnosed with dementia in 2018!😢
So sorry to hear that. Rest in peace Barbara.@@LynetteA68
My mother's final day... I begged the doctor to please end it as had this been my animal suffering I cld put it out of it's suffering so how much more so my beloved mom... he angrily said he cld'nt do anything even when I informed him that as a Nursing Sister she admitted to administering extra morphine to end the suffering of a patient... he looked at me and shortly after that she fell into a coma... I thanked him... I wld never divulge his name but am still grateful for his compassion....
I think this happens a lot more than people let on.
Thank you for sharing this.
My mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, but, fortunately, she only suffered a year of it. While I miss her, seeing this makes me grateful she never needed to go this far. It’s heartbreaking to watch someone once strong and vibrant falling so far from themselves.
Love to Barbara.
caheddr qd
Falling so far from themselves. That’s so powerful.
How old was she?
He looked a completely different man towards the end, so skinny, poor soul x His wife is an inspiration, a true hero, my heart goes out to you
People talk about others losing the light in their eyes, it was very apparent with Malcom to me.
What a beautiful woman.
I live in America and old people are cast away and all but forgotten.
What a great woman to honor her husband till death.
Salt of the earth...
Sad, many will never have someone to care for them, weather never married, wife doesn't care, no kids, other dies first. Will Barbra have someone to care for her. It's all sad!
@Southern Mema you are not the norm.
Just because you did the honorable thing doesn't mean, most Americans do.
I've seen old people cast aside to die in a facility.
Outa sight outa mind.
I am going through this right now with my Husband. I am his caregiver 24/7. He has early onset Atypical MSA Parkinson's. No help, Medicaid only covers 1 hour per week.
Not sure how long I can do this. A very lonely place to be.
God Bless you for taking care of him as long as you could💜
You just gotta love for profit medical care!
@@sandgrownun66 how cruel. This dear lady deserves compassion not a political statement.
@@ksbordersjville "how cruel." No! The way big business and greedy shareholders profit off the backs of the sick in the USA isn't cruel. It's a bloody disgrace! How a so-called "civilized" country can treat its people this way is beyond comprehension. What has politics got to do with basic decency and humanity? Why not just keep bare-faced Capitalism away from the suffering of others?
Big virtual hugs i lost my dad to this horrible disease I felt I lost a bit of myself when he left he was one of the most beautiful men I've ever had the pleasure of knowing and proud to be his daughter.
*DEMENTIA CURE:* Thanks for sharing some of your own story. I am a 74-year-old man, I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease 15 years ago, I always like to use my experience in a positive way to educate others. It is common knowledge that Alzheimer's robs people of their ability to remember. Having dementia for me was lonely, isolating and scary. But when people share their stories, it can provide inspiration, hope and a welcome reminder that you are not alone. Homeocure Worldwide is natural cure medicine. The professional had earlier told me there is no cure, I asked a professional to explain this to me? They said it is a miracle. All the patients I have directed to Homeocure Worldwide return with thanks. Don't let drug companies keep you as a slave to their mediocre medications. Don't let them tell you there's nothing that will help you. Today I can say that I'm living life instead of surviving it. For more info, contact Homeocure Worldwide
I lost my father to Alzheimer's in 2001. It was a five year journey for him/us. Thankfully he received excellent care (my parents lived in an apartment in a fantastic senior retirement place. My mother lived ten years after his passing and her mind was completely sharp til the end. From what I understand we were very fortunate as dad never showed any aggression or anger. Before Alzheimer's, he was a gentle soul and that never changed. He was much different from some of the behavior we see from Malcolm in this video. I'm very grateful not to have experienced that. Barbara took so much on herself, she was in dire need of respite throughout. I'm sorry to hear about Barbara's passing from the same illness.
I hope their children know what a wonderful woman their mother was. Truly someone who helped make the world a better place for others. May she and Malcolm rest in eternal peace.
"In sickness and in health... 'til death do us part..." wonderful to see loyal love ... kudos to his family for their caring ...
Denny Smith ,this lady was full of abounding love for Malcolm.She had to have some wonderful years with him in the past.I guess if u get enough love and caring from someone you can give back without limits.The end of this was difficult to watch.
Not if it's killing you too. Like Malcolm my father must have had this from a very early age.It takes a massive toll on the carer and in our case, the children too. Of course no one expects a young, otherwise very healthy and active man to have Alzheimers so it took forever to have it diagnosed. The whole time we thought my father was just an awful person and that our mother was out of her mind for staying with him. I mean we didn't even remember him being normal so how else would we know he hadn't always been, well lets just say not great. Anyway apart from the violence aimed at Barbara, my mother wasn't physically abused by my father, he actually started out a very aggressive person to every one and became softer and softer as the disease progressed. Oh and yes like Malcolm the total opposite to his normal personality (as we knew him any way)
My mother had an autoimmune disease and another very painful condition besides that. The absolute worst thing for autoimmune diseases is stress, it makes any autoimmune disease worse and my poor mum had plenty of stress with my father and her mother needing to be cared for at the very same time. My mother had both my grand mother and my father to look after together. Them both being the most demanding and least appreciative creatures on earth. My father with Dementia and my grandmother....... Well let me explain. My grandmother was 83 and had been living on her own and so was doing very well. She got unsteady on her feet and was told to use a walker. She went out one day without my mother and apparently wasn't using her walker and fell and shattered her knee. The Dr's wouldn't operate to fix her knee because they thought she was too old and would most certainly die on the table. Effectively them not wanting to operate on her made her bed bound and because my mother absolutely couldn't care for her physically, any more she had to go into a nursing home. My mother was physically unabIe to care for her once she couldn't walk, or do much of anything for herself any more. ( my grandmother lived until she was 98 and did end up having the surgery, which certainly didn't kill her) Unfortunately because she had been bed bound for too long, and she never walked again and had to stay in the nursing home.
My father became too much for my mother too. After only 1 month being in the nursing home another man in the nursing home attacked my father and he fell and broke his hip. They thought he would be fine with surgery but all the drugs they gave him finished the job that Alzheimers started. We all think as terrible as it was a broken hip was a blessing in disguise. It was better for him and every one else that it didn't drag on and on, because I am sure my mother would have carried on caring for him until it killed her too. I don't think any one one would want that to happen. She deserves to enjoy the rest of her life. She had cared for others since she was 8 years old, would you people have had her die still caring or maybe die even before my father?
@Southern Mema Thanks, you seem like you are an empathetic as well as sensible person. There was so much more to our story that could speak to my mothers decency. Life is so much more complicated than just staying with your husband no matter what. If I believed in an all knowing, all loving God, or any God at all I would say that he saw my mother was going to kill herself trying to care for both my father and grandmother at once, so he acted. I don't believe in God though and I was just glad my mother got a break for once in her life.
@Southern Mema Thanks for your comment. Oh so much more to our story, than the simplification I wrote. You sound like a sensible and empathetic human being.................so rare in the comments section of RUclips, So glad to have come across you.
You've evidently never cared for anyone with dementia.
Love and care has to be unconditional. I see this and I truly am homesick for my Nursing days at the Geriatric homes. I felt I had a place there everyday, the warm smiles and greetings no matter how jumbled made sense to me because I would look in their eye's and search for their light. You grow so much in your youth from learning how precious life is, to have sweet and gentle compassion. I still have a tender place for elderly in my heart. The wonderful stories I was blessed with from some of the residents were the most wise, profound, hilarious, and memorable. What treasures we have in these aged persons, what blessed treasures. May God bless and ease their burdens.
You’re a beautiful person.
Now you have seen what unconditional love looks like. I stand in awe of you Barbara.
The honesty of this documentary is heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time. Wow.
I find this story to be so profoundly, deeply, emotionally painful that I literally feel weak...How I long to wrap my arms around Barbara in a comforting & loving embrace...I pray she's made great strides in healing her heart, & that perhaps she's found such enduring love again...
This is what dad went through while he looked after mum.I called him after I watched this documentary and I talked to him how much he means to me and how much I love him and we were talking for 3 hours ❤️
Thanks !
How lovely!
I worked for twelve years looking after people like Malcolm in residential care. I am in my late sixties now, and knowing what I know about the reality of dementia I will take my own life before I lose the ability to do it.
I agree.
I'm with you. There are worse things than dying and we just watched. RIP Barbara!
Same, especially after years of being a nursing home CNA.
I agree with you. I'm watching my mom go through this and she is only 61 years old. I do not want to die like that.
I worked just as a cleaner in a care home aged 17-23. It’s worse than cancer the only death I saw that was worse than dementia and it was a lady with every arthritis in her whole body who slowly died in agony in bed. With bed sores to the bone all over her back.
It’s horrific, human enthansia is much more kind than keeping you alive that sick.
Dementia is a "living" death... you witness the inexorable loss of everything you hold dear about your loved one. What's worse is fact that you can do NOTHING to stop or slow down the progression of the disease. It truly doesn't matter how much you love that person because dementia is a incredibly cruel and heartless disease.
@Denise Vasquez Lemrick alzheimers IS a form of dementia. Smh.
*DEMENTIA CURE:* Thanks for sharing some of your own story. I am a 74-year-old man, I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease 15 years ago, I always like to use my experience in a positive way to educate others. It is common knowledge that Alzheimer's robs people of their ability to remember. Having dementia for me was lonely, isolating and scary. But when people share their stories, it can provide inspiration, hope and a welcome reminder that you are not alone. Homeocure Worldwide is natural cure medicine. The professional had earlier told me there is no cure, I asked a professional to explain this to me? They said it is a miracle. All the patients I have directed to Homeocure Worldwide return with thanks. Don't let drug companies keep you as a slave to their mediocre medications. Don't let them tell you there's nothing that will help you. Today I can say that I'm living life instead of surviving it. For more info, contact Homeocure Worldwide
Heather Mefford , you said it ! A living death. It’s appalling.
There is more than one kind of dementia. Only Alzheimer's is a death sentence.
@@johnsonjack4611 this is a scam. If it was real the whole world would know about it.
I have taken care of many people in a nursing home just like this poor soul, his wife is a saint,
Same here x although it's heart breaking its an absolute honour for me and I love our residents like family x have such deep love and smiles even though they are going through this, bless them
God bless you for taking care of him and not abandoning him as you surely could have . No one of good conscience would fault you for that.
Thank you for adding this film. I've not watched it since broadcast for personal reasons. But tonight, for whatever reason, I decided to, despite owning my own copy on DVD. Which I've never watched.
The story behind this film is just as important as its message, contrary to the media hell that surrounded its second release in 2007. Paul Watson painstakingly filmed the family over many, many years. There was no direction or mission, just the truth of this horrific illness. Paul turned up and pointed his camera at what happened, however brutal. He even chose to film it by himself, no lighting or sound person - just him and a camera using, at the time, the latest Sony digital camera. Not to be clever but because he cared that Malcolm would not react well to a full film crew surrounding him.
Paul was a family member. Paul is a wonderful, sensuous and caring filmmaker - not the hard story-chasing hack some would have you believe. He points a camera and lets the pictures tell the story.
Malcolm is my father. The music on this film is all his composition. I am his youngest son - the one who did 'nothing' and kept 'putting it away'. Still doing that!! Paul has my utmost, utmost respect for this film. He is a gentlemen, an artist and a filmmaker only ever interested in the truth. Thank you for putting the film up here.
However painful it is, this film lays bare the truth of this evil illness. People, and the powers that be, need to understand how brutal the world of Alzheimer's is.
My heart goes out to you and your family, specially your wonderful mother, sending you my love all the way from Egypt
God bless you and hello from Corpus Christi, Texas!
MrSoaringMan thank you for sharing your Mom and Dad with us. My grandma had dementia and it was so sad to watch her just slip away. She was gone long before she passed away. Such an awful disease.
Beautiful documentary 💕
I'm sorry for your loss. Both of your parents seem to be quite amazing people. It must have been a very neat childhood. Take care
MrSoaringMan Thank you for sharing. It brings a very clear, concise, and often painful reminder to love as much as we can because we never know when we will not have our loved ones taken. I commend you and thank you. God Bless You and loved ones.
It is so heartbreaking for Barbara, losing someone you love a little more each day.
Where were their 2 sons???!!!! How could they let their mother suffer to exhaustion that way??? They should be ashamed of themselves. That woman gives us all an amazing example of unconditional love that marriage should represent
I agree.
As the filmmaker pointed out, there was in home help available but she refused it. This was her choice.
You tube Dr Tam Cummings
did it come to you that they have families of their own they have to take care of. i bet they visit from time to time.
Probably working all hours God sends in this terrible day and age.😢
I lost my dad two months ago. He was diagnosed with slow progression dementia several years ago, but 3 weeks before he died he was diagnosed with stage 4 metastatic prostate cancer (by the time it was found it was in his bones, brain, and most internal organs) My sweet 15yo son made the statement “I’m glad it was something quick that took him and he got to go knowing who we all were and that we were there, and he got to take most of his memories with him”
Mark Haywood thank you for your kind words and thank you for a lifetime of giving to others. I also hope that soon that option is available to people, I’m here for you mark,
*DEMENTIA CURE:* Thanks for sharing some of your own story. I am a 74-year-old man, I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease 15 years ago, I always like to use my experience in a positive way to educate others. It is common knowledge that Alzheimer's robs people of their ability to remember. Having dementia for me was lonely, isolating and scary. But when people share their stories, it can provide inspiration, hope and a welcome reminder that you are not alone. Homeocure Worldwide is natural cure medicine. The professional had earlier told me there is no cure, I asked a professional to explain this to me? They said it is a miracle. All the patients I have directed to Homeocure Worldwide return with thanks. Don't let drug companies keep you as a slave to their mediocre medications. Don't let them tell you there's nothing that will help you. Today I can say that I'm living life instead of surviving it. For more info, contact Homeocure Worldwide
Jesus mercy,Mary help !...🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻
❤
Did he not go to the doctors? They should have caught prostate cancer. How old was he?
What a woman. Barbara Pointon is a hero. May she Rest In Peace.
This is a true example of a woman honoring her wedding vows, despite his physical aggression, his hateful words to her, and “losing” the man she married. Barbara, you are an inspiration
My mom had sundowners. It was the hardest thing to watch for her to go thru. When she past I was called horrible things by people who didnt understand that it wasnt a sad thing for her it was a relief because she wasnt the person who raised me. I Love her....
I have never held such respect and admiration for a human being like I hold for Barbara. What an astonishing display of love
My sister in law is suffering from Alzheimer’s Disease too. She still can stand a conversation. I started watching this Documentary to learn and understand how it develops, so I can be with her as much as possible. Thanks so much for sharing your lives adventure with the rest of the world! We are all siblings in our Lord’s Love. I’m sure both Malcolm and Barbara are well together up in Heaven! God bless you guys!!! ❤❤❤
The brain is amazing. He can’t take care of himself, yet plays the piano wonderfully. OMGOSH, poor Barbara !
What an inspiring, brave women Barbara is.
claire99
claire99
I'm afraid she was NOT brave when it really counted...she put her own needs before Malcolm's when she lets 'love gets in the way' of mercy...she couldn't let him go (due to her own selfish need to keep him alive even though he is suffering to the extreme.). IF she was so brave, she would have let him pass away sooner with the little dignity he still had left.
Lynette what was she supposed to do? Overdose him? Smother him in his sleep? Have him starved earlier on so he would’ve died faster? I mean honestly, what other humane options did she have? No, she wasn’t selfish! If she was selfish, she would’ve thrown him in a home and forgotten about him. Instead she loved him and stayed with him throughout it all.
@@Danielle33384 people dont abandon their love ones when in a care home. Some cannot cope anymore
It’s amazing how much music is an innate part of him. Even though his brains and communication are failing him, he can still play the piano so beautifully.
My mother is exactly the same. She’s 96 and it began last year. It’s been quite rapid. I’m 67 and her son, and moved back from the USA to live with her and look after her when she had cancer years ago, and now I’m taking care of her with Alzheimers. I don’t regret it and declined help which was offered from the District Nurses and Dementia Unit as my mother gets distressed when anyone visits. Yes it’s difficult when she gets aggressive and violent, but I’ve had to become more detached when this happens and not take it personally. She used to teach and it’s heartbreaking to see her now, a shell of her former self. She is sometimes coherent and can have brief discussions, other times screaming and talking gibberish, cuddling a giant toy dog. I don’t see this as a duty, just a journey we are completing from when she looked after me, and now our situations are reversed. I look for no pity or praise, it’s just a fact of life, and I’m fortunate to have had so many good memories of her. None of us are here for very long, and it brings into reality how pointless our accumulation of possessions are, and the need to prioritize. In the end there’s only love that’s left, and ‘our little lives are rounded with a sleep’.
This is such a beautiful post, I’ve saved it. Christ be with you and your beautiful mother.
@@KristiLEvans1 thank you, and God bless you and your family, always…
You are so correct. Thanks a lot for sharing a very beautiful true account of caring for your mother and the reality of life that Love is truly what plays the role when a person is no longer able to take care of himself.
What a lovely son you are. She must be so proud.
Such a wonderful woman, she was loving and devoted to her husband beyond compare. The blessing is that they were reunited once again in their love until eternity.
Barbara, you are an amazing woman. I wish everyone who had an illness such as this or dementia had a person like you to care for them. I don't know what else to say that would not just seem redundant. My heart goes out to you.
It’s so very familiar to me. I helped care for my dad as he grappled with Lewy Body Dementia. It was a nightmare. So much of what poor Barbara dealt with is exactly what we dealt with. The only difference is my dad would have ups and downs, with periods of mental clarity and physical normalcy for several weeks at a time, every so often, right until the end. My poor dad expressed such fear and anxiety when he was able to express it. This breaks my heart, and I wish that no one ever had to endure such misery. It’s a monstrous disease.
Hi, Valerie,
My Dad Kelvin suffered from Lewy Body Dementia and died in 2018 Aged 80
I was his first born Son, and as i lived close, helped my mum care for him.
Watching his physical decline and general sadness and confusion. My mum did have a hard time looking after him but wanted to keep him at home as this was his wish and my wish too for him to be at home as it was home! Much of my help meant I would drive him around daily if I could, hold his hand while walking, help dress and go to the toilet.
The Palliative care in his last week was so good and comforting knowing I many changes to say goodbye, now I remember his faith, love and family life. 😊
its an evil disease. it distroys the person ever so slowly, inch by inch. l live with my parent when l was in my 20's after my marriage fell apart while there my grandfather was moved in. it wasnt too bad at the start, but slowly it turned him into a stranger. he was put into a home. he didnt knows us for awhile then he did. it was so very sad, heartbreaking. all the best to all those carers and families who go through this its a nightmare
It's horrible.. worse is the early onset alzheimers..
Imagine having a loved one in his/her 50s diagnosed & living with this, whilst kids graduating, getting married & having kids themselves..
Truly awful..
My mum was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s,the first year she lost all her friends as she became paranoid and combative and frankly very hard to manage. She was always threatening to kill her self and eventually she did by throwing her self down three flights of stairs,the long goodbye they call it😞
I hope you are doing well? I had to realize that there are some things I can not change
Omg. I'm so sorry. That's horrible.
I’m actually crying for someone I never met. This story made my heart ache. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Ive never seen a stronger willed woman than Barbara she was very amazing, her husband a fighter to the end, I find it heart wrenching this disease steals our loved ones from us, life isnt fair, and life is long at the shortest, God bless this lovely family
Beautiful family and wife. As a retired nurse, I appreciate her analysis of the abuse of patients in steeling funds away from supportive care to people with Alzheimer’s and other debilities diseases. Yes, it takes much love to persist in care. Such care givers need care also. God bless you.
I never comment on RUclips videos but this documentary is by far the most touching , emotional programme I’ve ever seen ❤ what an amazing women Barbara was ♥️ Alzheimer’s is an evil disease !
The fact he was still able to play the piano is amazing and also troubling because he couldn't do much of anything else. Seeing him be combative with Barbra was hard to watch.
this summer my husband has been diagnosed with same condition by the Addenbrooke's team in Cambridge too. He has issues with understanding and processing language but at the moment it's quite mild . By the end of the film about Malcolm I was in tears for him and for Barbara. But also tears for what will happen to my husband too. I look at him now and find it hard that it will go like that as at the moment he is independant and driving. Most of the time is fine. We have good support from a lovely Dementia nurse for basic information. Thank you for this film that sadly shows the raw reality of this wicked disease that robs people's mind, thoughts and awareness of life and their surroundings. So very sad for Malcolm as so gifted and talented man.
I have to be honest with you. You should get help now. For both of you and all family members. Nurses and therapists to talk to. Each time it will get worse, it will be like a new death. At the end you'll be "glad" it's all over. Plz don't hate yourself for that coz you're probably a very good person.
In Australia we have day care for those suffering from this and other diseases. Govt funded. So the carer as well as in home help can have time out for themselves - to keep their mental and physical wellbeing in line
Even towards the end, his skin still looked in remarkably good condition. It is clear that Barbara cared for him so much despite how difficult he was to care for. Rest In Peace Barbara and Malcolm.
Brutal end of life! And no one know how it will for us 😢
How have people disliked this video? It’s suppose to teach people and show commitment n love
The dislike may not be about the video itself. It might be about loathing the condition.
It's sad that's why all the dislikes..
Maybe somebody thought that showing that poor man babbling was disrespectful
Stephanie Richards , ... I’ve stopped caring what goes through people’s minds when they dislike. I’m sick of having to digest everyone’s opinion on every subject. It was not like this before the Internet. It can be overwhelming. And after watching this video, I feel gutted, so I just couldn’t care less about stupid ppl and their opinions on everything. They must think that anybody noticing their feedback, will give a toss about it. Nope. I don’t.
Because most people in the world are evil heartless people that shouldn’t be given the chance to be happy it’s disgusting and horrible
I'm so deeply honored that you let us into your lives to show the world this horrible disease. Barbara I hope that you as well have found happiness in your life, you were a loving and respectful and caring wife, whom til the end took such devoted and loving care of Malcolm. You will be in my prayers dear lady 🙏❤
Barbara you were a very devoted, patient and caring wife. Rest in Peace Malcolm. The suffering is over, at last.
My heart goes out to you Barbara, I thought my story was worst but watching you! God bless you for taking such a good care of your husband. I took care of my husband until he took his final breath at forty one he was six years older than me, God and my family have been my strength raising very very young kids.
Barbara, you are a true inspiration to anyone who has to take care of a loved one suffering from Alzheimer's or dementia; God bless you for helping us all to understand xx
My wife has AD. You have inspired me with your courage . I hope you now have peace of mind and able to get on with a normal life.
was such a wonderful program to watch, as I lost my mother to this terrible thing. rest in peace malcolm and barbara you have the heart of an angel.
Thank you Barbara for showing us what Alzheimer’s is and how it takes effort, love and patience to take care of their loved ones. Bless her family 🙏🏼❤️ she was such an angel.
She’s such a wonderful woman! She never abandoned him and loved him the whole way, through the good times and the bad!
This is truly heart breaking, my Grandmother which was my Mother's mom had Alzheimer's, my Mother had Dementia. And yes, it can run in families, 2 years ago my Dr told me i have Alzheimer's. Oh i can see some changes, but i told my Dr that both Mom and my Grandmother took meds, it didn't help, so I told him i don't want anything, he smiled at me and he agreed with my decision. I gave care to both of them, and i have no regrets. May my sweet Mama and Granny Rest in Peace. My Father who passed with cancer, may he Reast in Peace also.
❤️ 🌹 ❤️
How old was your dad?
AMAZING. I cried and smiled. This woman is a beautiful person and the film maker was one of the best I’ve seen. Wow, I am so touched by this story.
God bless you, Barbara. R.I.P. Malcolm. A true love story.
If this is your god's blessing, then what is your god's wrath?
I worked in Nursing Homes and saw staff yelling at people like him. They are in the wrong profession. These people need love and nurturing and understanding. It just made me cry. They can't help it. The poor wife. What a trooper. It is hard living with this. That poor man. Love and Prayers for both of you!
Anyone who abuses the elderly and or children need to be euthanized.
He was so young for this to happen. Barbara was so good. I'm now so very sad. I took care of my Mother. This reminds me of her, I miss her everyday.
I couldn’t imagine my husband like that,, it would shatter me and me as a person my whole life would stop. This wife has strength to keep pushing forward and i admire her for it.
I watched my great grandma, grandma and grandfather slowly deteriorate from it. I lost the three people in my life who truly cared and loved me. 1993, 2007 and 2016 are the years I lost them. It broke me when I visited my grandma in the nursing home and she was afraid of me because she didn't recognize me. It absolutely broke me.
I’m sorry for your losses. The grandma you knew is gone, that is why there is no recognition and only fear is left. Try to come to terms with the fact that she has already died, even though her body is still alive.
I hope they at least lived a long life.
This documentary is extremely moving. I truly hope that it will help folks get better help and care. Barbara. ...you are an amazingly strong, loving human being! We didn't get to see much of Malcolm before Alzheimers, but I can tell he was definitely an amazing person! Many blessings to you all!
This story was probably the best, and most real Real Stories that I've ever seen! It was just beautifully put together with such a loving couple. Thank you Paul! Thank you for your entire 11 years you put into this story! JUST BEAUTIFULLY DONE!
Very handsome man, he has mischievous eyes, I bet they were a hoot when younger. My mom had Alzheimer's, very horrible diesease
Oh my gosh, I cried so much, it's so sad how cruel life is sometimes
OMG, what a tragedy for both of them. RIP Malcolm and Barbara.
Barbara is a saint. Bless her heart for being such an incredible woman and a true example of unconditional love!
I've been a nurse for 15 years and I work at a center dedicated to Alzheimer's Disease. It's such a horrible disease that impacts everyone.
Oh thank you so much for putting this on youtube. I saw this on telly and looked for it for a long time with no luck.
The experience of this couple feels so like the reality of the disease. My mum had early onset and my dad looked after her until it became completely impossible. The decline of Malcolm, his behavior and symptoms so closely mirror those of my mother its quite heartbreaking.
If someone has no idea about this disease I think this film more than anything else I have seen will take you on the inevitable journey that awaits everyone who loves someone with Alzheimers
Barbara is an angel, her voice is soothing and amazing. It's almost like a song. I'm not surprised she and Malcolm fell in love with each other. It's perfect. I'm so ashamed of nature, and of the fact that Alzheimer's did this to them. It's so absurd, and so sad. His son is amazingly talented and I'm crossing my fingers for him, that he did well for himself with the absolute talent that his dad imparted on him. The entire family is gorgeous. Sad, but gorgeous. I had a family member in this position, and it was heartbreaking. They did the best they could, and more than most. I admire them.
Barbra was an Angel. Malcom was so lucky to have a woman with a heart of gold.
Saddly Barbara has passed now, in 2020 i think. Im sure she suffered with Dementia in the end.
RIP Malcom & Barbara together again, pain free 🕊🙏
Such a shame for Malcolm and others who go through this horrible death, Barbara is an inspiration to others, looking at Malcolm at the end and how ill and thin he was, i do not understand how any one can let another person suffer like this, why keep him alive and in pain for so long is cruel, if your pet was dying and in pain the first place you would go to is your vet and help your pet to die peacefully ....I truly think more should be done to help people like Malcolm die with dignity and without pain.
Bless you Barbara and for taking care of your husband.
I think that anyone that crosses the street to avoid saying hello to them or chat when someone is in a situation like this and (she might just want some comfort by a friendly talk ) is utterly disgusting and it really shows your true self you should be proud We need more like you around
As a nurse, I remember a family member becoming angry at the care staff for not doing things to her satisfaction, she was always so demanding and angry at us. We never had enough staff. The family just couldn't handle it and decided she could give better care at home so he took her hubby home to care for him. Three months later her husband returned to the facility. The wife looked so tired and haggered. She never complained to the staff again. This is the hardest but most fulfilling job I've ever had. 😔
I am just shocked that they are both in their 50s, I would have guessed in their 70s...man that really took a toll by aging them both...so sad.
I thought that Malcolm was in his 70's. Barbara? At least in her 60's. This illness certainly took its toll on each of them.
It must have started in his late 30's! He kept mentioning a strange 'vision.' So whatever his Alzheimer's is, it began with hallucinations. There's got to be some kind of abnormal deposit of proteins that the body attacks, perhaps similar to an autoimmune process.
No, Barbara was born 1939 and Malcolm 1940. He was 51 when diagnosed with Alzheimer. At the time they documented this they are in their late 60:s and hen was 67 when he dies. Barbara died recently in 2020 at the age of almost 81.
English (British) people usually looks older than what they really are
I remember when i was 10 when i lived in Belgium i had a teacher who was pregnant. I thought to myself why this old woman pregnant come to find out she wasnt even in her 40tis she was in her 30tis
But yea english people age faster than thier age
@@thegracetofollow4194 it's the harsh cold weather I think. It's so drying on the skin.
What a beautiful wife, women, soft spoken, intelligent, kind and compassionate person they must have been best friends and had a tremendous love between them most women would have walked away forgetting about the love and life they had sometimes taking other men before they even died she truly still loves this man until he died Barbara no amount of the violence she was put through but continued to be there every step of the way until the very end so that he could die in dignity i
I’ve been careing for dementia and Alzheimer’s residents for over 30 years! Ive watched them over time deteriorate. Very hard at times to watch, especially the family photos around there rooms! Old Wedding photos, family photos really bring everything home. Bless them & there families🌺🌸🌼
Well... bless YOU ! I lost a family member to it. Thank you sooo much for your work.
*DEMENTIA CURE:* Thanks for sharing some of your own story. I am a 74-year-old man, I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease 15 years ago, I always like to use my experience in a positive way to educate others. It is common knowledge that Alzheimer's robs people of their ability to remember. Having dementia for me was lonely, isolating and scary. But when people share their stories, it can provide inspiration, hope and a welcome reminder that you are not alone. Homeocure Worldwide is natural cure medicine. The professional had earlier told me there is no cure, I asked a professional to explain this to me? They said it is a miracle. All the patients I have directed to Homeocure Worldwide return with thanks. Don't let drug companies keep you as a slave to their mediocre medications. Don't let them tell you there's nothing that will help you. Today I can say that I'm living life instead of surviving it. For more info, contact Homeocure Worldwide
What a compassionate, loving woman you are. God bless you
I cried after watching this. The poor man. He had an amazing wife. May they both rest in peace.♥️
I lost my grandmother to Alzheimer's three and a half years ago and I've also worked with those suffering and it is suffering dementia. Barbara, her love and determination to care for her husband is what true love is. This was filmed a long time ago but what would happen to Malcolm if she wasn't there as his champion? Over medicated or given medication that was clearly having a detrimental effect on his wellbeing, Barbara was doing a better job seeing the harmful effect the meds were having on him over the doctors!. Dementia is one of the very cruelest diseases alongside MND. The families would come to visit their loved ones and I will never forget the pain on one daughters face when her parent didn't recognise or interact with her yet responded to the staff. My Gran travelled the journey very much like Malcom. She had a UTI and was taken to respite care where she attacked two members of staff and broke two windows with a walking stick she found. That night she was escorted off the property by the police and taken to a psych ward. She was never aggressive as herself but Alzheimer's took her down that path as it does with many. It took a couple of years for them to get her meds right and by that point she was in a care home, she wasn't capable to look after herself and home care just wasn't enough. Where Malcom remembered the piano my Gran remembered her cats some from my early memories. Alzheimer's and the UTI's took their hold (they often go hand in hand and have a severe effect) and over two weeks she had two major heart attacks, the first of which the doctors couldn't believe didn't kill her, the usual UTI and she even beat sepsis. She suddenly became very tired like her body had just had enough and she passed away a few days later. My last contact with her was on FaceTime and for all she was very much like Malcolm and nonverbal at that point when she heard my voice she opened her eyes and smiled that devilish smile I grew up seeing. If the comment below is true to Malcolm' and Barbara's sons I'm so sorry for your loss, your parents were wonderful people
Malcolm looked at the end like my dad did when he came back from the Burma Siam railway in the Second World War. It took the love of a woman to get him back on his feet so that he was able to live a reasonably normal life although he was ill most of his life and died quite young. My parents were an inspirational couple and I was privelaged to care for my mother in the last few years of her life after she developed dementia and had strokes. It is a gift from God to be able to care for a loved one
It is a privilege. God gives us very little we can do for our parents, but this is according to His plan.It would be wrong to expect a stranger to care for someone who has loved you and given you life. terribly difficult, but you have the assurance that you have done all you can, and loved them at the same time.
A wonderful though extremely painful tribute to real love. Whoever finds love like this is truly blessed because it's very rare.
It's heart wrenching to see Malcolm changing before our eyes; my heart breaks for Barbara, though she is so strong. My parents just moved to back to Holland, they're 71 & 74, & my biggest fear is this reality happening to them.
Barbara is an amazing and remarkable human being! So very sad to watch what both Malcom and Barbara had to endure. But thankful Barbara was willing to share such a personal and intimate time in their lives in order to help others to understand the what Alzheimer’s is really like.
Barbara was an absolute Saint! I am almost angry at the sons and my heart hurts for Barbara, knowing she tried with every single breath to do this on her own.
Barbara passed away June 2020 aged 80.
So sad to hear this.
She also died of dementia 😢 RIP BARBARA 🙏🕊️
What a wonderful , loving woman she was, she never gave up looking after him and in his final days she was still comforting him and stroking him to keep him calm, how lovely. My mum now has dementia and we are having her and my father move in with us and I hope I can give them as much love as Barbara did as they are wonderful parents. What a good example she was.
I watched my parents die within 5 months of each other. It was sad seeing their health deteriorate over the years but they didn't loose their mind to Alzheimer's or Demintia. I could not imagine anyone that has to watch their loved one's go through such a process. It would kill me inside to watch such a thing and I commend anyone that has to go through this. God bless the families that are faced with this situation.
Drakos 67 ~ it happened quickly with my mother. At times, it was heartbreaking. I watch the fear in her eyes when even some of her children would visit and she didn’t know them. She would look at me with fear in her eyes, look to m e to be sure I was going to protect her. At times it was amusing, such as when she constantly told me how she was keeping track of her family by watching them on television as cameras followed them around...it wasn’t happening, but the things that came out of her mouth were funny.
Also heartbreaking was preparing for the funeral of my sister, the youngest of my mother’s many children. My niece was curling my mother’s hair and my mother looked up at me, asking about my sister, “Do you think she’ll show up for this thing? You know how she hates these family gatherings”. I assured my mother that my sister would be there. My mother’s siblings and very close friends, started dying, there came a point where my siblings and I decided that telling her about deaths was only giving her pain, we no longer told her.
Perhaps the most heartbreaking was walking into her room and she was sitting up on the side of the bed, she was making piles of toilet paper squares. I asked, “Whatchadoin mom, do you need something”...My mother looked at me and said, “I’m keeping my hands busy. You know, I’m going to die and the only thing I wish for is to see my mother before I die and take her for a walk on the beach. You could go too, I know how much you love the ocean. It’s not very far you know”. My heart shattered, my Memere had been dead for many years at that point, my mother was born and raised in Maine and as a child, she almost drowned which caused her to hate water and never learn to swim. I told her that I would check into making plans.
I was blessed that my mother never forgot who I was and that when the last breath left her and she stepped through the gates of Heaven, I was there, at her side. I’ll see her when I get there! ❤️🌻❤️
Drakos 67 my mum has dementia
katebaby100 ~ I’m very sorry to hear this. I’ll give some really good advice...when people say, “You should go home, she doesn’t know you’re here. Tell them “I know I’m here”. Please never stop praying and never stop being there for her. 🙏🙏🌹🌻🌹🙏🙏
Angel For Animals she’s unfortunately in a nursing home and had a bad heart to 😞
katebaby100 ~ I’m sorry, that’s a tough situation to be in. Luckily, my mother didn’t ever have to go into a nursing home. I hope you visit her often and I’m sure she knows you love her. 🙏🙏❤️🙏🙏
Malcolm is my age. I just turned 57. I often think about how young I still feel. Alzheimers has got to be one of the cruelest things that can go wrong with us. I felt so sad for Barbara. I think many times, the Doctors over medicate the patients, so they don't have to deal with them. I have a mentally disabled daughter, and that has happened to her. The whole thing is just heartbreaking.
Barbara. You are such a beautiful person. I lost my darling husband after 55 years of marriage a few months ago to Dementia. After 6 years of home caring I put him into a most wonderful private nursing home. He was there for three years. The deteriation over the years was heart breaking. It brought back so many memories. After watching it, I just broke down and sobbed. The love, care and support I got was wonderful. This dreadful illness is slowly being recognised thank god . Charities have been set up, but we still urgently need Goxverment to put more money into care. Kindest regards to a truly inspirational lady ❤
I've worked in the care sector and I must confess looking after those with dementia especially in the advanced stages is emotionally draining, it really was for me the hardest part of the job, it often left me teary eyed and for me it was a job I could go home from & have holidays from whereas loved ones who are carers don't get to home, they are at home... I have so much respect and admiration for Barbara and all carers who care so selflessly for their relatives, it really is like a living death. Such a terrible illness.
*DEMENTIA CURE:* Thanks for sharing some of your own story. I am a 74-year-old man, I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease 15 years ago, I always like to use my experience in a positive way to educate others. It is common knowledge that Alzheimer's robs people of their ability to remember. Having dementia for me was lonely, isolating and scary. But when people share their stories, it can provide inspiration, hope and a welcome reminder that you are not alone. Homeocure Worldwide is natural cure medicine. The professional had earlier told me there is no cure, I asked a professional to explain this to me? They said it is a miracle. All the patients I have directed to Homeocure Worldwide return with thanks. Don't let drug companies keep you as a slave to their mediocre medications. Don't let them tell you there's nothing that will help you. Today I can say that I'm living life instead of surviving it. For more info, contact Homeocure Worldwide
Johnson Jack Enough of the advertising, “Jack.” You’ve advertised your product repeatedly in the comments here and it starts to come across as crass. You made your point.
TundraWoman Says man
@@johnsonjack4611 please stop posting about this....at present there is NO cure so your constant comments in this comment section are completely inappropriate and actually verging on exploitative.
My gradatude to that lonely man who did the video my deepest respect for his compacionet heart to be able to film this, thank you for an amazing job! God bless you
omg so sad that women was such a lovely person life can be so cruel it's hard enough to grow old then for this to happen. R.I.P Malcolm hope barbara knows how wonderful she is can't imagine so hard it must have being God Bless you and your family
If this is your god's blessing, then what is your god's wrath?
“We can’t expect life to be fair when it never is” truest words I’ve heard.